Why couldn't he get laid?

>>83005978
He was only 5'9

>>83005978
he was gay all the time

he was a cartoon

In Universe: He tried to hard.

Generally speaking? Because its funnier that way.

he was a big guy

The show was a numale power fantasy

>>83006083
it was literally the opposite.

A nufemale one maybe. This was the most feminazi toon of its time.

He put the pussy on a pedestal

This show was a psyops to reduce white birth rates and breed a virgin population that is clueless and repulsive

It worked.

it was a kids show

He disrespected women.

This message is completely lost on kids under the age of 10 who are watching Cartoon Network
Jews and women are stupid.

DO THE MONKEY WITH ME, CMON!

He probably wasn't as muscled or good looking as he was portrayed
Just how he saw himself.

>>83007532
Dude he was just in a coma the whole time!!!!!

>>83007532
I like this

>>83005978
We only saw the times he didn't get laid

He was probably pulling major league poon off camera

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But he did.

I don't know, probably the jews or something.

>>83005978
did you watch the show? half the time the woman outright rejected him based on who he is, and he would go out of his way to try and pursue the chick despite all the injuries and embarassments he'd gain along the way

the other half was a woman that was perfectly into him but some form of nonsense would hamper things repeatedly until the whole thing falls through

dude just had bad luck generally

he lived in an alternate universe where chads can't pick up women

jews tried to demonize hyper masculinity in non-jewish non-hispanic white men

>>83005978
Same reason as r9k: wanted it too much, while simultaneously being scared of it.

There was an episode where he was kidnapped by space babes and they were going to have orgies with him until forever, but at the last second they saw Braveheart on tv and decided to replace him with Mel Gibson.

there are some theories that jonny was actually a small kid and all this shit was imaginary

it also explains him living with his mom and being besties with like a 7 year old girl

>>83005978
he was a /tv/ poster

>>83008988
Fucking stupid, he lives with his mom because he's a loser like you. He's friends with the girl because his mom is friends with her's.

Hes the proto-chad, the missing link that lead to the creation of the ultimate Chad, thats why he couldnt get laid because he was imperfect

>>83009209
oh anon, i dont live with my mom, but you do

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>>83005978
>ywn be a buff loser with good hair

>>83005978
he was a beta masquerading as an alpha

>>83008418

kek