do you guys think mystique ever leaves skidmarks on chairs or sofas

Fuck off retard

>>82865276
No thats one pf her superpowers

Another one of her powers is not having a pussy or butthole

>>82865276
OP do you not know how to wipe?

>>82865276
Why no guy going "BRAAAP" for 300 lines? Disappointing.

>>82865344
>wipe
>not having a bidet attachment
So if you get shit on your hands, you just rub it in with dry TP and call it a day?

>capeshit thread
>star wars thread
>capeshit thread
>company wars thread
>video game movie thread
Do I spend my time here with teenagers?!

>>82865432
>using 4chan after the age of 13

Grow up.

>>82865507
are you implying youre younger than 13?

>>82865276
Worst capeshit casting decision ever made? That includes new Lex too.

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>>82865406
>getting shit on your hands

why doesnt superman just fuck her? open goal right?

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>>82865276

>>82865406
>>82865563
...how do Bidets work exactly?

>>82865598
Blast water at your ass and rinse of any remaining shit.

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>>82865276

>>82865406
I dont eat and use keyboard with my asshole

her pusy juice probalbly leaks everywere

>>82865598
>>82865624
I also give myself a wipe with triple-ply to dry off my undercarriage.

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>>82865327
Does mystique actually have no genitals? I don't remember them ever showing a shot with her legs spread open, but Im assuming you see enough of her to know there's no pussy on that costume. if that's true you could argue that it's cannon for her to have no vag

>>82865539

She was fine in First Class, but after her career blew up huge you could tell she thought the role was beneath her and really phoned it in in Days of Future Past and Apocalypse.

>>82865690
I shove a sponge up my ass

>>82865563
Kill me, Pete

>>82865698
>cannon

>>82865563
Kill me, Pete

>>82865709
How loose is your butthole if you can penetrate it with a sponge?

>>82865792
It's not, I bleed a lot

>>82865276
Does she war panties?

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>>82865698
Wait hold on guys I just thought this through. She's a shape shifter, she could just hid her vag/bunghole while in public using her shape shifting powers

>>82865851
but its still there...leaking...

>>82865835
So you use the sponge to absorb the blood until you need to shit again. thats pretty clever.

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15-sheet master race reporting in.

The first wipe must be done with 4 sheets of 2-ply. The comfier the paper, the better. Really rub around and scoop up that shit. If you clasp it between your pinky finger and your ring finger (with other fingers underneath to stabilize it) you shouldn't get any shit on your hand.

The second wipe (and THE most important) will be done with 3 sheets of 2-ply paper, with a generous helping of sorbolene cream on it. (Pic related). This will ensure that everything can be contained properly like when they put that foam on oil spills. Really wipe around with it, make that mess goopy with cream for the following wipes.

The third wipe, with 3 sheets of 2-ply, is something of a "containment wipe". Ideally you want to scoop the goop in closer to your butthole where the fourth and fifth wipes will take care of it.

The fourth wipe, again with 3 sheets of 2-ply, will need some sorbolene cream because the previous wipe will have left things rather dry and clunky back there. There's a good chance that paper will have become caught in your asscrack-hairs as well.

The fifth wipe is more of an after-thought, with 2 sheets of 2-ply. This is where you can round up the last of the sorbolene cream and really poke up in there to pick off nuggets that might have been caught in your anus.

Happy wiping!

>>82865276
BBBBBRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPP

>>82865904
How does her power work? Is she a changeling like odo or is it just fooling people's perceptions? If shes like a changeling than her junk probably gets covered up/ retracts into her

>>82865971
I dont believe in anything good anymore.

>>82866003
that would really hurt though. although im p sure she can change into dudes though, so i guess she grows a dick then

but then in theory she could transform into anything?

>>82865598
You use it AFTER wiping to clear the dingle-berries.

>>82865406
....Did you just imply that you clean your hands with a bidet?

Are you ACTUALLY literally pig-disgusting?

>>82865344
>not know how to wipe

Hey man, sometimes after taking a really greasy shit, you just don't get in all the crevices, and it seems/feels clean, until hours later after working a sweat, you get swamp-ass.

>>82865971
and they say autistic people can't be productive

>>82865406
I don't have a BD. Usually I just wipe once and then jump in the shower to blast my ass clean.

using only toilet paper is fucking disgusting

>>82866483
Why not just shit in the shower and save yourself some time? Way more efficient, plus you don't use up any toilet paper. It's a win-win.

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>>82866483
>be in the navy
>going months without using a bidet because Trump won't put them on navy ships
Remember me on Veterans Day.

>>82865276
HERE....

IT....

BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP

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>>82865507
MODS

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>>82866077

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>>82865971
>ideally you want to scoop the goop in closer to your butthole

You actual fucking mong

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>>82865276

>>82865971
>using anything less than 4 sheets (2 ply) per wipe
Enjoy your finger punching through the paper into your asshole, retard

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>wrap toilet finger around finger
>sting finger up asshole
>squeeze asshole
>no poop

>>82867436
>Navy

Must suck having to eat out your shipmate's shit covered asshole, faggot

>it's a subhuman doesn't understand how ass wiping works episode

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>>82870132

>>82865276
who /uses 20 baby wipes per shitting every other day/ here

>>82870132
>toiler finger

>>82865648
Fucking Singer man, Rebecca has some serious brass to be basically naked, but that god-awful hairstyle...

>>82865598
Fucking love bidets

>>82870186
I suffer a crusty butthole for your freedom I deserve some god-damn respect.

>>82870786
i love you lad. fight the good fight

>>82870438

mai nigga, can't believe I spent most of my life wiping my ass with dry toilet paper

>>82865698
She has kids in the comics, so yes, she does. Mother of Nightcrawler and Sabretooth's kid.

>>82866104
She can't change her mass. Apparently. So if she goes bigger or smaller her density or something changes? I don't know how that works as I'm a retard, but I know if she takes on a big muscular dude form she still has her base strength and would be 'lighter' than the dude, so like, if she became Arnie then you could knock her over and lift her up and it'd look like you had super strength. Conversely if she became Tyrion she'd be harder to knock over or pick up.

>>82865563
Kill me Pete

>>82865406
>not shitting in the shower and waffle stomping it down the drain while cleaning your ass after

>>82871109
I miss bachelor frog threads

>>82865971
I thought I was the only one who plucked the nuggets out with my hands. These dumb niggers dont even know how to shit properly kek

>>82871067
what a whore

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Obligatory.

>>82865387
The brap is dead, bury it

>>82865971
>Going through all that instead of using Booty wipes
>>82865406
>Shooting water up your ass and getting all wet instead of using Booty wipes

Seriously how is everyone not using booty wipes? Literally use two - three and your good to go

>>82870186
t. A 16 year old who wants to join the muhreens that thinks all branches just hate on other branches all day, and that we're not really all bros

>>82871772
>wiping with chemicals and clogging pipes and septic systems instead of using the next best thing to a shower

>>82871772
Cause booty wipes clog the toilet and don't dissolve in the water like normal toilet paper does.
Seriously, if you're using some fucking wet wipes instead of just applying small amount of water onto folded tp..

>>82871500
I'm in suspense, do you have the next issue?

I think I'm in the minority here, but I have no idea.
I'm a naked pooper. I have to take my shirt and pants completely off to continue the deed when I sit down. There's this inexplicable feeling of being chained when I'm wearing clothes while pooping.
Anyone else here do the same, or am I alone here?

>>82871500
fuck i remember reading this on /b/ years ago. like 9 years ago. any more classic's in your folder?

>>82871540
>t.hothead

Listen here, kid. Braap will NEVER die, EVER

>>82872428

I do that too sometimes but only because it feels more comfortable.

>>82870132
I do this too.

>>82865406
What is the sink in your bathroom for? Do you think it's just there for show?

>>82874468
I pee in mine.

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>>82865276

>>82865648
Who's the fatass on the right?

Only dumb westerners get skidmarks.

>>82870786
Thank you for your service

>>82865276
>>82865563
>>82865658
>>82865690
>>82865709
>>82865971
>>82869093
>>82870438
>>82868807
I just want you all to know that you're absolutely disgusting and if I found out that you wipe your ass in real life, I would probably just end you right there and then.

>>82865276
Maybe when she morphs, poo particles fall off. Like maybe she can manipulate her skin to be smooth and clean.