I'M MARY POPPINS, Y'ALL

>you look like mary poppins
>was he cool?

Shit writing desu.

>>82737239
glad I skipped this

that was an EPIC moment

>>82737276
>hell ye he's cool
It really is the best. You know its good your just mad that you like the same things Reddit likes

>>82737239

>"I ain't done nothing right in my whole life, Rat... You gotta let me have this."

TOO BASED TO LIVE

>>82737276
yeah what the heck? Don't the writers know Mary Poppins was a SHE? 0/10

>too autistic to enjoy a lighthearted joke

>>82737449
you cant actually be this dumb..Im being trolled right?

1/10 since you made my reply

>>82737430
>>82737449
>was he cool?

It's just a stupid response. You can tell they wrote it as short as possible because they were only falling for 10 seconds and they apparently just had to have him say a funny line about him thinking it was cool to be Mary Poppins, but for some reason they couldn't put in a line earlier where he is told about her and how she flies.

how can a blue alien have southern accent?

>>82737448
>Rat

Rude.

>>82737476
Pointing out shitty writing is autistic

Yeah, bro, just turn your brain off!

>>82737276
>>82737449
Are you seriously assuming Mary Poppins gender??

>>82737546
> for some reason they couldn't put in a line earlier where he is told about her and how she flies.
shit I just realized how much better than joke would have been if it was delivered like this

>>82737556
lots of places have a south.

I'm Groot :DDDDDD

>>82737573
It is autistic, though. All criticism is fundamentally null and void. Maybe instead of wasting your time crying about blue aliens talking about Mary Poppins you could actually care about real issues.

Fucking loser.

>>82737608
I'm a fucking idiot and I realized that right away. That's how shit it is.

>>82737637
Not bad. I give that response a 7.

>>82737681
>hehe anyone who challenges my retarded worldview is le baiting XDDD
Kill yourself you actual fucking idiot.

>>82737714
That one wasn't as good. 5, maybe 6 tops.

>>82737773
Haha, okay buddy. Keep living your sad delusional life where everyone who isn't stupid and disagrees with you is simply "le baiting XDDD bro". Cancer.

>>82737546

>Yondu falling down with his cool ass flute or whatever, he thinks he's suave as fuck
>Starlord sees it and compares him to someone he doesn't know, while smiling in a way that seems genuine and not trying to poke fun or anything

No need to explain everything you literal autist. That's not how normal people talk. Why would Starlord go "Uhhh, AKSHULLY, Mary Poppins is a girl and isn't cool at all but she does this thing with her umbrella etc etc"

>>82737787
7/10

>>82737787
That was about the same as the last one. I'd give it a solid 5. Work on that.

>>82737801
Yeah man, just turn your brain off and have fun!

>that's not how normal people talk

MOVIE BASED ON A COMIC BOOK

Q U I P S
U
I
P
S

>>82737655
No that only would've worked if he had randomly used his arrow to float like that previously, but he never does, and it's cooler to see him use it like that for the first time later on in the movie. The line was fine as is, I dunno why you're overanalyzing it.

>>82737801
This

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>>82737871
Epic, le troll bro. U mad XD
>>82737880
You are definitely autistic.

>>82737880

No need to turn your brain off. It's just effortless dialogue because most people. Who gives a shit if it's based on a comic book, Starlord is clearly very attached to his human side and Yondu is also very humanoid. Keep spouting memes and coming up with no real arguments

>>82737609
And if you go to far south you hit Space Mexico.

>>82737900
Right on, bro. Just turn your brain off!

>>82737916
3/10.

>>82737944
>who gives a shit if it's based on a comic book

lmao

Pump the breaks retards, it was two lines of lighthearted dialogue, it got a few hearty chuckles. If you're seriously picking apart three sentences, you have something wrong with your brain. No one judges a movie off of one quip. The rest of y'all, shame on you for making fun of the retarded.

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Who was in the right?

>>82737556
That little thing behind Quills ear is a universal tranlator, Quill thinks he should have a southern accent so it translates that way. The veiwers are hearing the same thing Quill hears

>>82737963
>if i keep posting my autistic """"bait"""" ratings, he'll get MAD! XD
God you are an actual mongoloid. Do you have anything better to do with your empty, sad fucking life?

>>82737546
his ignorance of the character is the reason the joke works.

>>82738056
Jeez anon, let it go

2/10

>>82738106
>IM LE EPIC TROLE
Really bro you should leave the house sometime. Pathetic.

>>82738056
Another 3. Your first attempt was your best. Work on it.

>>82738130
I hope you realize several people have probably replied to your shitposts with these shitposts, lowering the overall quality of this board

>>82737963
>Just turn your brain off!!

Dunno who you're directing that at, but I never said that lol

>>82738098
No, it's the reason the joke would work if it was set up better. It's the kind of joke that should have been set up in some way earlier in the movie but they instead they crammed the setup immediately before the punchline.

>>82738140
attempt at what, you fucking retard. everyone realizes how much of a stupid sperg you are and all you can say is BAIT XDDD. literally kys

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RIP best character ark and epic meme in the film
You will always be remembered, Commander Worf

>>82738222
3/10 but I'll bump it up to 4 on account of those trips.

>>82738225
Tazer Face.... whole theater erupts in laughter. Every fucking time they say Tazer Face the theater erupts in laughter. Have no idea why other peoples joy bothers me. Autistic I guess

>>82738269
autism is the only answer to that question. you're an idiot who thinks, because you SOMEHOW didn't really like a shallow capeshit film while other people do just for fun, you are superior. but you're not. you are fucking autistic, worthless and dumb. fuck off.
>>82738254
faggot

>>82738296

I didn't say I didn't like the movie I actually did like it and the first one, just I couldn't figure out how the whole theater thought it was insanely funny every time they said Tazer Face?

>>82738269
Don't mind them, I agree it was extremely forced and not-funny. My summary of the movie would be just "forced humor: in space"
And as >>82738296 said, autism is strong in those who don't have empathy. I understand the type of people who enjoy that shit... Not fully, but I've worked with/talked to enough people who like these movies that I have a good idea of what makes them laugh.

>>82738296
Faggot? That's it? 1/10. No trips to save you this time.

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>>82738269
>"Tazerface"
>light giggles and chortles from the audience
>"What kind of guy names himself Tazerface?"
>audience erupts with laughter, some wipe tears from their face
>"Did you wake up one day and just say 'Tazerface sounds like a cool name"
>audience is roaring in a hysterical fit, some women have feinted and are passed out on the floor, some men are bending over attempting to catch their breath
>"Tazerface huh"
>one man suffocates from the kino-tier comedy, the theatre had started to become depraved of oxygen from the rampant usage
>"What was your other idea,"
>the audience leans in with curiousity, the Earth trembles slightly
>Rocket takes in a light breath of air and opens his muzzle
>"Scrotum-head?"
>the reaction from the audience is so untamed that space itself distorts, causing the Earth to collapse onto itself condensing into a radius of 8.7mm, creating a new singularity

>>82738400
mad because you're retarded

>>82738535
You're not even trying. 2/10.

How many times have you replied to me at this point? 8? Holy shit.

/tv/ really is such a sad place. I would love to see it put out of its misery, however all the subhumans would spill over to other boards.

>>82738610
get out of my petri dish, REEEE

>>82738030

I just want Karen Gillan to step on my balls. That's not so much to ask.

>>82738607
you're such an epic troll dude wow xdd

>>82738183
Don't ever try to make movies

>>82738610
It's really the same as /r9k/ but the autists over there don't even watch movies and tv

>>82737544
You are beyond retarded.

>>82738738
If only someone had said that to James Gunn and whoever wrote this movie.

>>82738705
3/10. A slight improvement.

>>82738183
Holy shit dude you are definitely on the spectrum. Do you ever interact with other people? That moment was as natural as the sun rising. Never fucking comment on interactions between people again. Fucking dumbass.

>>82738829
>he's actually implying that people in a goofy sci fi comic book movie should act like real people

You know there is a difference between reality and the movies, right? That people in movies don't usually act exactly like people do in reality? Do you need this explained to you?

>>82738869
Cause yondu had been in 2 good movies, and not 2 good movies and like 10 shit ones

>funeral in space movie
>they throw his remains into space

wtf he wasn't born in space, put him somewhere that doesn't suck

>>82737239
MUH STEPSON

>tfw american
>always thought the 'americans clapping' thing was a joke
>usually see movies at 10am when they're half off so theres never anyone else
>went to see guardians on a saturday night because i couldnt fit it in me and my wifes schedule
>jam packed
>everyone claps like a retard when movie is over

i'm never doubting /tv/ again

>>82738959
Yeah but the funeral scene in Wrath of Khan is still kino of the highest order.

>amazing grace bagpipes
>that shot composition
>his was the most... human

So this guy speaks with a southern american accent but can't understand a reference about an american movie?

Fucking stupid

>>82738978
I saw it at 3:20 on a Thursday afternoon. Me, my brother, and my cousin were the only 3 people there. It would have been pretty nice if the movie was good, but I'm glad I didn't have to sit amongst a bunch of faggot nerds chuckling about all the meme quips. Actually, now that I think about it, I'm pissed. It was the first time I've ever seen a movie with no one but me and the people I came with, and it was this shit.

>>82738978
>Glorious UK cinema experience.
>No one talks
>Quiet laughter during funny scenes
>Hear the occasional whisper as plot points explained to old grandma who can't follow the film

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>Drax talking about impregnation

>it's beautiful, and so are you... on the inside

kind of cute I guess

>>82738896
Weak bait

>>82739208
2/10. Still trying though I guess.

I want to fuck the mantis

>>82738183
Give me an example of how you would do it.

>>82738030
Probably not the one whose entire purpose for one and a half movies was to try and kill her sister and then attempted to deliver a "I ONLY WANTED A SISTER" line with a straight face.

Shit character.

>>82739008
>A blue alien has a southern accent so he must have an extensive knowledge of earth's entertainment

>>82739327
I wouldn't do it at all. They should have written a different kind of joke there. What kind? I don't know, just sure as fuck not the one they went with.

>>82737239
>Rednecks
>In
>SPAAAAAAAAAAAACE

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>>82739390

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the line that literally destroyed DC

>>82739416
You can meme back at me all you want but it's not unusual at all to notice a problem but not necessarily know how to fix it right away.

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>>82739390
you're mad

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>>82739477

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>Yondu Character Development
>Make him even more Likeable
>Kill him off

>>82739482
>>82739507
3/10.

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>>82739598

>>82739446
why do i imagine i've seen a picture just like that from some BLACKED.com thread

>>82737882
QUILL
U
I
L
L

>>82738030
In that picture it's obviously Gamora.
Unless we're suposed to be looking from the other side.

actual spoilers
My biggest complaint in this movie is how Kurt Russel is so soon to impale his son/turn him into a battery after getting shot up by him.

I mean, if you're a god and the form you're making up is simply a form,
what shit do you give that some idiot just shot it up in a bout of anger?
Wouldn't you realize that the best option would be to show compassion to forgive their anger? His character seemed less like a god and more like a rich man who doesn't get social norms, which still doesn't even fit because he fucked aliens all over the galaxy. He was even smart enough to hold off telling him the truth.

I don't know off the top of my head how else they could have created a conflict faster. Maybe if he said, "I have to kill your friends because they know too much" or some shit, but the route they took seemed so out of character.

>>82739618
5/10. Decent improvement for how badly you've been doing.

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>>82739660

>>82739551
that's movie writing 101.

they wanted you to feel something for his passing so they had to make you care about him

>>82739652
His name is literally EGO, they couldn't have it made it more obvious that he's egotistical. He didn't care about Peter, he just wanted to purge the galaxy.

>>82739707
I might be retarded.
I forgot his name.
Never put that together.

This thread made me realize that Peter is the same character as John Chrichton, how did they got away with that?

>>82739682
1/10

>>82737546

hello r*ddit

>still bitching about a single joke most people found funny a month after you saw the movie

and people say /r9k/ is pathetic

>>82739652
Because he wanted to consume the universe really badly. Also he doesn't give a fuck about people, he just attacked Peter because he knows he's immortal and will eventually get over it like he did in a million years or so.

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>>82739894
That's the response when someone likes this movie, anon.

>mfw I just realized clueless redditors are coming here and calling anyone who disagrees with them reddit

Jesus Christ...

>>82739968
How deep does the rabbithole go?

>>82739652

My main grip was:
>have this power that's natural to you
>been using it for literally millions of years to do all kinds of crazy shit like building a whole fucking planet
>get your halfbreed son
>teach him a bit on how to use the power
>he becomes so good at it you can barely keep up with him
>finally die because you couldn't fight back

This wasn't acceptable in TFA and it's not acceptable here.

>>82740061
Honestly, he's pretty distracted with everything else going on, I'm sure there's enough to keep him busy from using the full potential of his power.

Why did Yondu give his space suit to Quill?

Isn't Quill's mask a built in space suit too?

>>82737544
fucking ret

>>82740128
quill put his mask/suit on drex, didn't he?

I liked everything about this movie except the Taserface bit.

felt forced every time.

>>82739551
he's been around in the infinity war filming

>>82740254
>everything
This was worse in terms of humor from the first movie. I was expecting a funnier movie, but everything felt forced or fell flat.

From a story perspective, I found this movie more engaging, because I actually liked the villains they involved.

>>82740284
I felt 50/50. some of it was very funny and felt like it was made by James Gunn.
other parts felt like Disney told him "it isn't GotG enough!".

that was the only part that I absolutely hated though, everything else was excusable.

>>82740316
imo, most of rocket's lines in the movie were lame.

>>82740284
Best main villain out of the last few MCU movies, and decent side villains as well. We really got to know Ego a lot more than with most of the villain lineup, and him being a total prick came through personally, rather than a vague grandiose "I'm evil" characterization.

>>82740345
imo, most of your face is lame.

>>82740365
Damn, I'm going to sleep and that's the last thing I've read tonight.

Thanks, jerk.

Disappointed in the lack of Mantis R34 so far tbqhwy

>>82738269
Nah it feels like James Gunn is in his own bubble and that everyone should laugh at his shit jokes. Honestly that scene went on for way too long and wasn't at all funny.

>>82740316
>I felt 50/50. some of it was very funny and felt like it was made by James Gunn.
Ah yes, the same man that brought us this cinematic masterpiece?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FgYr00Scelc

>>82739361
Apparently you've never dealt with a psychotic sibling. You are lucky.

>>82739774
>might

>>82740128
>>82740165

His mask cracked in half, then he gave his spacesuit/jetpack to Drax, which hurt his nipples.

>>82737239
i always thought yondus actor was a cracked out nigger. turns out its that white guy from walking dead

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>>82737239

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>Ego is the entire planet
>Yet he needed to use his physical manifestation to try and get the bomb
Why couldn't he just light tentacle into his brain and grab the bomb?

>>82740061
>he becomes so good at it you can barely keep up with him
>finally die because you couldn't fight back
no, dumbass. peter got good enough at throwing rocks to keep him distracted while groot BLEW HIS FUCKING BRAIN UP

>>82741783
There's so many plotholes in this movie its ridiculous

>retard son barely able to create a hadoken beats someone who has trained millions of years
>revealing you put cancer just to tick of son who was upto that point on your side
>will that is strong enough to support a planet is influenced by a "fleas" sleep-no-jutsu

>>82741870
The point is how was he able to hold his own to begin with. Ego is an entire planet for fucks sake.

>>82741938
>>will that is strong enough to support a planet is influenced by a "fleas" sleep-no-jutsu

forgot that part

>>82741961
>Ego is an entire planet for
like you are your computer. his fleshy avatar is clearly more than JUST an avatar. his brain might be in the planet, but he lives through the avatar. its not like he can just go from planet to giant rock monster. he was making rock constructs and so was peter, after yondu taught him to not over think it and use his heart instead of his head. its not like peter was running circles around his dad. he was just competent enough to throw rock fists and make a big yellow sphere.

>but he should be able to do this
>he should be able to do that
clearly he cant and couldnt since he didnt do it. and peter could and did since he did it. youre forgetting that he was in his element and was basically a god. your gripes are all non valid

>>82737239
He goes on a 10 minute murderous rampage in the middle of a "family friendly" movie, stabbing everyone in the heart.

I'm ok with this.

>friend loves marvel movies
>thinking of seeing GotG2 since the first one was fun
>he said it's garbage

Was he right ? The trailers looked pretty awful.

>>82742127
>his fleshy avatar is clearly more than JUST an avatar.
Says who? He didnt care two shits about getting shot up

>he was making rock constructs
The entire planet is egos rock construct. He has full control of it there was absolutely no need for a fist fight

>after yondu taught him to not over think it and use his heart instead of his head
This is anime tier levels of shit

>he was just competent enough to throw rock fists and make a big yellow sphere.
Ego was on the backfoot for a large duration of that fight

>youre forgetting that he was in his element and was basically a god.
Pratt or ego

>>82742296
why are you trying to analyze a capeshit movie
youre just supposed to turn off your brain and enjoy the ride
this aint mulholland dr

>>82738183
why are you latching onto this one minuscule thing insisting that it's poor writing? why are you so insecure about your intelligence?
it's not bad at all, you can't have every single joke set up beforehand or your movie is going to be stupid as shit

>>82742286
It focuses on character arcs rather than the stop the villain story.

>>82742407
>Yondu was literally a cuck who raised his wife's son and was proud of it

Based cuck.

>>82738896
Yo youre pretty autistic desu

>>82742528
And you sound like a DCuck desu. When was the last any dc character acted like a real person!

I hated the first flick and thought this one was an imporvement, the pacing was off though and a lot of jokes fell flat like Taserface. It managed to stay serious throughout the emotional climax of the film which is more than I can say for the first one

>>82742557
I have no idea what youre getting at and you really should stop replying to this thread because of how big of a fool youre making yourself out to be

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LOOK KIDS! IT'S BABY GROOT™! LOOK HOW CUTE BABY GROOT™ IS!
DON'T FORGET TO PURCHASE THE OFFICIAL BABY GROOT™ TOY AT YOUR LOCAL TOYSTORE!

lel i read it in the voice of Spring Breakers' Alien

>>82742563
They were still making quips through the emotional scenes

>>82742613
looks like reddit is here

>>82742626
I only remember two fairly minor ones, nothing as bad as dance off

>>82742613
worst part of the flick

>>82742591
The point is its fantasy with fantastical characters and situations. They're not real and wont act as real people. You're the one thats too autistic to understand that

>>82742656
More than two iirc. They were minor thats why it was passable but still annoying, they even quipped during yondus funeral

The opening titles went on way too long. The concept of Baby Groot™ doing naive shit while everyone else was fighting in the background was neat but it didn't have to be dragged out so much

Were we really just meant to be distracted by "aww look how cute Baby Groot™ is!" for three minutes?

>>82742748
normies eat that shit up

>>82740055
you mean the reddithole anon

>>82738183
You are a fucking dunce

>>82737546

It was a scene to show Peter looked up to Yondu and was considering his feelings instead of shitting on him. Because he was peter's dad.

>>82738530
kek

>a bunch of outlaws
>have a CODE
Truly the worst film trope

>>82742905
I have come to expect nothing less than stupidity from fans of these movies.

>>82742528
1/10

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>tfw the theater audience literally fucking "awwww"ed whenever baby groot was on screen

>>82739834
because Ben Browder is actually in the film, I'm sure he's cool with it

>>82737880
Fuck off Dcuck. Go make a thread about LE BASED AQUAMAN XD

>>82743902
Right on, bro. A tip o' the ol' fedora to you my good sir. Stay epic.

>>82737580
9gag tier humour

>>82743749
kys.

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>>82744030
k

>>82741783
Because Peter was fucking with his ability to control the planet. They make a point of showing Peter forcibly dismissing the energy tendrils and releasing everyone from the traps ego put them in. At that point he had as much control over the planet as Ego.

Peter wasn't just holding the avatar back from the core, he was holding the core back from doing anything remotely.

Even if you think it is stupid that he would suddenly be able to fight on Ego's level it still ties into the overall theme of the power of love and family. Ego was self absorbed and couldn't see what was really important despite all his power. It took him millenia to gain the level of control that he had because he was trying to brute force it through will alone.

How the fuck are the GotG meant to team up with the avengers without being OP as fuck thanks to all their scifi shit?

>>82744299
>At that point he had as much control over the planet as Ego
>This halfbreed who just learned how this light thing works yesterday has as much control over it as the guy who was born with it and has been working with it for millions of years
>This is okay because love trumps everything

Literally low quality anime levels of writing

>>82744533
in the comics Thor and Hulk have a higher power level. they literally went toe to toe with thanos

This is just like "The Cake is a Lie".

You're taking an amusing or funny scene and spamming it over and over again until it becomes forces and awkward. Why do you do this?

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>>82743586
how else would they be so organized?

>>82744770
In the comics everybody is stronger except for maybe Captain America

>>82744886
how the fuck is iron man stronger?

>>82744918
>what is Superior Ironman?

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>raccoon was unlikable for most of the film

>>82737430
Pretty much the reason anyone hates either film on this site.

>>82737239
>>82737276
>Marry Poppins came to take care of kid with daddy issues and taught him how to be a proper English gentleman
>Yondu Udonta took care of kid with daddy issues and taught him how to be a space pirate
>Both had to leave forever at the end
Yondu truly were Mary Poppins. And he wanted to be seen as a cool guy by his adopted son, hence the "I'm Marry Poppins y'all!"

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Hey kids don't forget to ask your parents for a Zune™!

>>82744989

stop phrasing answers in the form of a question you dumb american

>>82744995

that's the point

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>>82737430
Everyone in the movie behaves like a stupid American child.

The writing is just fucking awful, far beyond the level which could have been somewhat forgiven delivered with colourful CG action.

I wouldn't even recommend people pirate this online, it isn't worth the effort it takes to write the title into a search engine.

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>He said we're the frickin Guardians of the Galaxy; Only he didn't say frickin.

>>82745777
Rocket swears all the time, why was he hesitant to say the F-bomb in this scene? Why would he reprimand groot for swearing when he swears all the time himself? It didn't make sense

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>>82745777
I WAS LITERALLY IN TEARS WITH LAUGHTER! MY SIDES ARE IN HOSPITAL RIGHT NOW

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>>82744886
Nah, Captain America would beat the shit out of most sci-fi fags too. People don't realize Earth is actually OP as fuck.

So is Stan Lee now some interdimensional being and every single one of his appearances was the same person in-universe?

>>82737239
I really thought he was chuck liddell.

>>82739834
It's been obviously since the first movie. Disney just knows that not enough people have watched farscape for it to really be a big deal. It's not even like it stops there.

Gamora=former member of big bad's army who grows a heart and learns not to be an asshole=Aeryn sun (also nebula being a relative trying to kill her AWOL sister parallels aeryn's mum doing the same thing)

Drax=generic klingon-type alien warrior whose family has been killed by the big bad that he's trying to get revenge for=D'argo

Groot=very peaceful plant-based alien with strange abilities=zhaan

Rocket=tiny asshole character who is always trying to steal shit, always gets mistaken for a pet, and is brought to life with a novel special effect (rocket is mocap, rygel is a puppet)=rygel

Also as far as the first movie goes you could also draw comparisons between the mcguffin doomsday weapon nature of the power gem in GotG1 and the wormhole tech in farscape. There's so many similarities I'm really surprised more people haven't pointed them out, even with farscape's limited popularity

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Now that GotG2 is a confirmed flop (or at least greatly underperformed because of its massive drop off in its second week) do you think Disney's Marvel's Studio will cancel part 3 or just cut back its budget??

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>>82746467
god damn...

>>82741312
Pure kino right there

>>82744299
>Peter wasn't just holding the avatar back from the core, he was holding the core back from doing anything remotely

Shut the fuck up dude you are just making shit up

>it's an "adult male goes to see a litttle kids movie made by a multibillion dollar international corporation and he can't stop talking about it" episode

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>>82742548

>>82739627
because you've been brainwashed :[

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>>82737239
Star-Lord is now a more tragic character than Batman.

Anyone else went home and listened to Father and Son for a week straight? I forgot how much I loved that song.

>>82747127
I went home, read everything there is to read on IMDB, then I masturbated and fell asleep. This was two days ago. I saw it two days ago.

>7/10
>too much forced comedy
>not a big fan of that groot plant

>>82747127
I did go listen to a few ELO albums for the first time in a couple years if that counts

Why were there so many slowmo shots where there didn't need to be?

>>82744533
What do you mean, they are all mortals with good fighting ability at this point.

Quill lost his powers when Ego died

>>82738045
How do they all understand each other? Is they all wearing translators? Why is I am Groot untranslated?

I'm shocked Marvel didn't go all "Armageddon" feels at the end.

F

>>82739079
>baby/child starts crying
>mother swiftly escorts them out of the cinema

>>82737430

This guy gets it.

>>82747127

Good song, though I do wish "Two Fine People" would also get played more. He made it specifically for his "Greatest Hits" album.

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>>82737239
anyone else have sorta this look when groot jr started dancing?

>>82745486
>on 4chan
>doesn't like people communicating by memes

I'm not even american, you fag.

>lighthearted fun scifi movie
>/tv/ cant handle it

What do you think it is?

>>82737637
>real issues

Like whine and bitch about drumpf all day? Wow you sure showed them

DAVID HASSELHOFF LMAO

>>82747459
This actually happened to me yesterday at the alien flick

>>82745802
Groot is a baby. He's too young for cursing.

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>>82746520
I mean it is doing better than the original in terms of gross while only having a 3% higher dropoff in a worse month for movies so probably not.

>>82737546
I'm embarrassed for you

>>82747498
>lighthearted

Nah they tried to force a tragic backstory into a lowest common denominator kids movie and the ignorant consumers ate it up, just like Force Awakens

>>82747542
Considering the hype surrounding it pre release; thats bad

>>82747574
There was just as much hype around the original DC shill.

Plus wait until colleges let out next weekend, it is going to maintain and gross at least $400mil domestic

>>82741938
you have to base movies off their own world logic not real world logic
we've never had a giant sentient planet god in the mcu before
the only one i'll dispute is the revealing he put cancer in quill's mom is because he is basically autistic and doesn't know how to interact with people still
all he has done was go around the universe fucking alien pusspuss for a few millenia and then spending the last 30 years literally floating around looking for his son
mantis probably has better social skills than him

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>watched bvs
>Didn't like it
>watched gotg2
>enjoyed its mindless entertainment
>Would prefer to watch bvs again over gotg2

a-am i a DCuck?

>>82747661
>autistic and doesn't know how to interact with people still
>planted his seeds on countless alien puss over thousands of years

Something doesn't add up here

>>82747676
Yes. Now consider buying a rope.

>>82747529
Why does society have such arbitrary rules about swear words?
>you're not allowed to say this word because you're too young
It makes literally no sense. Too young to say a word? Bullshit. Either it's a word nobody can say without it being rude, or nobody can say it.

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>>82747772
he's a fucking celestial he just throws his god swagger around

fuck, even Notch got a wife after minecraft got popular enough
imagine what being a god could do

>>82744866
Because they have nobody who cares for them and think think that being obnoxious memers they will get some Internet love or something.

>>82747661
>you have to base movies off their own world logic not real world logic
this is the dumbest thing ive heard today...

>>82744866
The cake was delicious and moist, you just sucked and never got any.

>>82747616
>just as much hype
>literal who superheroes
>paraded around as the first marvel movie to tank
>its success and long life took everyone by surprise

you're a retard

>>82747863
t. 12 year old or worse, a 17 year old child who thinks he's an adult already

>>82747896
then why aren't you complaining about how a "space suit" is just a tiny forcefield? or how an interdimensional being is able to jump into our dimension without ripping the entire universe apart?
it's called suspension of disbelief you retard

>>82747542
>199 million
BWAHAHAAHAHA!

>>82747876
Nice head canon and who the fuck is notch

>>82747896
No that's how it works autist

>>82745344
Well there you have it

>>82748067
They'll never make their budget back, don't expect to get paid for defending them anymore.

>>82747977
Yes because when some cockroaches are trying to kill me by detonating a bomb in my brain the "logical" thing to do would be to shrink my self to have a fistfight

>>82748118
you're still applying our fucking logic you fucking idiot holy shit
how are you even able to post?
do you even read what i type?

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>>82748103
If you want to say 200mil more for marketing (Which isn't unreasonable for this movie holy fuck that marketing campaign)

It still made money and its not even the end of the 2nd week

>>82748154
you're the retard here. self preservation at all cost shouldn't be that much of a logical stretch even to a "god"

>>82747570

Even kids movies have someone dying or passing away

>>82747542
it needed to make 400 trillion in the first hour of release to break even.

>>82748227
this god has never encountered another person who is able to use as much power as he did he had no idea how to fight him
there's no metric for how a celestial SHOULD act in the mcu because we've never had a celestial in the mcu before
i'm literally fucking retyping shit i've said 3 replies ago holy shit fucking get it through your thick skull you fucking numb nut bitch fucker

>>82747459
Were we at the same show?

>>82748188
doest look good for GotG2.

hopefully they cut the budget for 3 which will keep Gunn in line. He really needs someone to tell him what to do...he goes off the deep end when left to his own devices.

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>>82738530

>>82747772
Thank you. He can't be both a guileless fuckwit and a beguiling lady's man at the same time. There were better ways to handle his character.

Speaking of which, they butchered Yondu's character, too. Not only did he murder an entire Ravager crew who were ostensibly the good guys in the situation, whatever their nebulous "code" may be, by t after the fact, he uses a built-in escape pod proving he didn't even have to do it.


>>82747676
You are breaking the conditioning. You might also be growing a brain.

>>82748274
Jesus you are dumb

>this god has never encountered another person who is able to use as much power as he did he had no idea how to fight him
He was on his turf. He knew excatly what pratt was. He could have crushed everyone to death as he displayed but chose to fight pratt.

>there's no metric for how a celestial SHOULD act in the mcu because we've never had a celestial in the mcu before
Theres atleast 3 instances of celestials being mentioned...

>i'm literally fucking retyping shit i've said 3
Because you're to stupid to grasp logic you dumb cuck becausr gods operate on a different field of logic right

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>>82746963

>Ravengers

>>82747429
Groot isn't wearing a translator because he's an undocumented space citizen. Every other spaceperson has one implanted, Rocket had one implanted when he was a test subject, etc.

Or they're all just speaking English because otherwise they'd have to come up with dozens of alien languages and write around language barriers, which would make the movie less of a lighthearted, pulp sci-fi story.

>>82737580
Epic meme, good sir!

>>82738530

I will force this into a meme. You'll see.

If spacesuits can be transported as small disks, why don't they just wear them at all times and pop em in the charger when they sleep?

>>82747616
>b-but dee cee

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>>82738222
>Spergs out while calling other people spergs
Is this advanced irony?

racoon and blue guy part was cool. planet dad parts were all awful

desu this 'joke' triggered me pretty badly in the cinema

>>82748627
They're for emergencies. Chances are Rocket has to do maintenance on them and if they carried them all the time they'd end up in sock drawers, under beds and who knows where else.

>>82741938

>revealing you put cancer just to tick of son who was upto that point on your side

Guess he just assumed Peter was so whacked out on his vision that he'd be cool with it.

>>82737239
DUDE EPIC REFERENCES: THE MOVIE LMAO
fucking plebbit normalfags please leave

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>This 100ft tall eldritch space monster is arriving in minutes to destroy the batteries powering an entire planet of people
GIVE ME A SEC I WANNA PLAY SICK 80's TUNES WHILE FIGHT

>Thanos one of the universes most powerful and destructive entities took me as a child and dismembered most of my body to perfect it for combat.
DUH I WAS THINKIN BOUT A NECKLACE OR SOMETING BUT OK

>This planet was once inhabited by billions of people with a rich and peaceful culture. they were exterminated brutally one by one at the hands of a cosmic evil.
DUH HUH WOUDNT WANT TO BE THOSE GUYS

>I was raped.. As a child..
WOw like I TOTALLY woudnt want to be you.

>>82740254
I think that whole bit was written that way, witb a huge payoff when he called the Sovereign and she laughed, too. Without it, you would have a Tarantino edge dark torture porn figure eight in the film, which is not the right tone.

>>82745344
>the average /tv/ user can't see the basic connection between the 2 stories and writes it off as "le plebbit" randomness

really makes me think

>>82750073
Yeah, Ego had already convinced Peter to abandon his friends and he probably wanted to take it one step further.

His narcissism lead Ego to believe that it would make him appear sympathetic, saying it pained him to kill Quill's mom in order to achieve his goal

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>>82738269
>>82738530
Why can none of you fags spell taser correctly?

>>82738959
>he thinks babies come from the ground

>>82749621
I think the Rocket/Yondu parts were much better then the Quill/Ego ones as well

>>82747529
And yet he still said fuck IN A KIDS MOVIE

>>82745802
Because it's a kids movie

>>82751545
Rocket got the best arc and the most character growth in this one. Yondu ties with on the latter but since he dies the value is diminished a bit. We got to see how broken Rocket and see him finally realize he wants to have friends.

>>82751919
I think they'll probably do a spin off or something focused on him. He's the most interesting character imo

>>82742748
its the opening credits dude, most movies dont have fun with that, usually its just overhead landscape shots

>>82737239
HAHA epic and awesome! xD good one bro *virtual fist bump* you win the Internet *upvotes* up you go!

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I usually think capeshit is boring but i think I might love this one. What's wrong with me?

>>82747459
i fucking wish

>>82750207
WHY DOESNT THIS CAMPY SPACE ADVENTURE MOVIE FROM MARVEL TAKE ITSELF SERIOUSLY DURRRRRRRRRR

>>82752058
I'd pay to see an almost-horror movie about him being engineered into what he is and then murdering every scientist he can catch.

>>82738225
I miss GWAR

>>82746963
isnt her dad evil too

why is the father figure always evil

Huh, I see /tv/ hates GotG 2.It must be fun but not great then.

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I STILL CAN'T GET OVER IT

;A;7

>>82752734
>why is the father figure always evil
He said in a thread about a movie which focused the narrative on a possitive father figure

>>82739834
That's why I appreciated the Ben Browder cameo. I thought the similarities to Farscape were pretty huge in the first movie and obviously it wasn't by accident.

>>82752496
I know right. Just switch your brains of ya doofuses

COME A LITTLE BIT CLOSER

>>82752895
YOU'RE MY KIND OF MAN

>>82752888
Contrary, turn your brain on and try to understand what "tone of the movie" means

>>82745344
K I N O
I
N
O

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Now that the dust has settled, which one of them would you rather fuck?

>>82753136
i won't catch autism from mantis, will i?

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>>82753136
Mantis all day

>>82737239
I hope this isn't as disappointing as the "I've come to bargain" scene you faggots talked up.

That was epic unlike Christianity.

>>82753136
The snarky Sovereigns must like it rough.
I like that.

>>82752947
This is what im saying. Its a kids movie, why expect anything other than childish banalities for crissakes

>>82753136
Nebula

>>82753509
It is

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>>82737239
>/tv/ wants so desperately to hate this
>starts complaining about quips, merchandise and bad writing
>only bad writing in the whole film is "we're a family!" being shoehorned in
>faggots can't enjoy an otherwise cheap popcorn flick

relax you spazzes

>>82746520
>because of its massive drop off in its second week
The Fridays numbers are misleading because the first week included Thursday previews.

>>82745470
I thought zune was dead?

>>82746467
>The character who impales a dozen guys and uses them to crush another dozen guys.
>Peaceful
Top kek anon.

>>82742286
it's better than the first overall, your friend is unsurprisingly a tasteless pleb

>>82752282
this jesus christ. have you plebs never seen a film before 1980?

>>82753136
Nebula. She would hate every minute of it.
But she'll pull you back into bed if you try to get out and threaten you with death if you don't try harder than the first time.

>>82753873
The Pacman joke was terrible

>>82754099
idk if this is bait but tahts the joke.

>>82754258
Rocket in this is genuinely disturbing. It's the first time we've seen him shoot people as opposed to ships and he's really getting off on it. Hurting people seems to be the only crumb of comfort in his miserable life.

>>82754326
>i live for the simple things, like how much this is gonna hurt
>shoots starlord with a taser-gun thing

>>82754326
Rocket was a borderline villain in this movie
>is a genuine asshole
>takes great pride in causing immense pain
>his greatest joy is murder
Did you see his disappointment when he realized the golden peoples ships were unmanned?

>>82754278
Except no.
The powers came from the heart and just shows how Peter really REALLY wanted to do Pac-man

>>82754326
>>82754352
>>82754410

Have you seen Rocket in the comics?

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>>82737372
>>82737276
>>82737239
Living proof that this board is full of edgy contrarians. This was one of the only decent jokes in the whole movie, especially compared to the stupid poop joke during the asteroid scene and the pacman shit

>>82754352
Yeah, forgot about that one. It's still not pretty. He's not a happy creature.

>>82737556
The South is in the heart.

>>82754326
Well they had just tortured Groot and airlocked half the crew...

>>82754958
Sure, he was justified in killing them, but all the laughter is disturbing. He's not a balanced creature, he has real emotional problems. It's a case of "Yeah, he's crazy, but he's OUR crazy."

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>>82754562
>and the pacman shit
kino

>>82754326
>>82754352
>>82754410
Hurting people is simple catharsis for him. Before him and Yondu had their talk he only ever felt comfort in causing pain to others (and to be fair he only ever really shoots people that he's justified to shoot) as it is like pushing all the pain he has experienced onto someone else.

>>82755062
Well they're all supposed to be reformed bad guys at best, the movie just doesn't hit you over the head with it like Suicide Squad does.

>>82755090
This is exactly correct. Rocket gets by being the meanest thing in the room and he's been hurt and pushed around his entire life. Hurting people back brings him real pleasure.

>>82755069
Pacman wasn't nearly the worst joke in the movie but it still turned what could've been a really cool scene into a literal punchline

>>82748259
Underrated

>>82752413
Nothing. This is the kind of capeshit that works. No stupid heroes in silly suits using their retarded meme weapons like bows or shields thrown into realistic setting of modern earth. It's more Star Wars than a superhero movie

>>82753136
Mantis for looks. Gamora for personality.