Stephen King

>>82227408
Who cares, it's all capes hit tier.

He sucks ass, fuck that hack

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>>82227408
The Stephen King cinematic universe is just a dull evolution of the Harry Potter franchise, the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises. Seriously, each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though r-right
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

>>82227547
You're taking a good copypasta and warping it into shit. Stick to Harry Potter threads.

>>82227516
>>82227450
This

>>82227408
>Stephen King

Hack writer/pleb enabler.

>>82227408
He is an alcoholic, right?

Or thats something I remember reading about somewhere.

Hey is Mr. Mercedes worth reading?

>>82227408
Stephen is so fucking ugly it's scary

he looks like a pedophile

>>82227450
>capes hit tier
None of the upcoming King's adaptations look like potential hits.

>>82228515
He used to be a massive alcoholic and cokehead. He got sober in the late 80s and has stayed sober since. The first novel he wrote after becoming sober was Needful Things.

>>82228882
The first It movie will probably make a shitload of money, the trailer broke records. The Dark Tower screams FLOP though.

>>82227408

Wasn't the dark tower trailer supposed to be out last week? The leaked trailer from a few months ago looked really fucking awful

>>82229350
I don't know. I'm pretty sure the studio has no faith in the movie. Everyone hated the leaked trailer and since then we've gotten barely any word on the movie. We're less than 5 months away from the movie hitting theaters and we still haven't gotten a trailer. This is what happens when you hire that hack Akiva Goldsman to write your movie.

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>>82229446

The first book was a bit thin but I really do think you could have made a film on it with no intention on making a sequel. I fucking hate they are rolling elements from the first 3-4 books into one movie.

>>82228535
Holy shit no. Im a stephen kingfan and I want to beat him dead for this shit book(s)! And he got an arward for this pile of shit

>>82229543
Yeah, they could've easily made a good film adaptation of the first Dark Tower novel but instead they decided to make some meta alternate universe bullshit that takes elements from the other novels of the series. Who's responsible for this retardation?
>Sony Pictures
Oh, now everything makes perfect sense.

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STILL NO LONG WALK REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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>>82227408
>It: Part 1
>It: Part 2

>>82230901
It is one of the few novels that should be split into multiple films. Hell, it should be three films instead of two. It's a massive novel, you would have to horribly butcher it to make it into one film.

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>>82230901
>It: Part 1
>It: Part 2

>>82228546
He probably is a pedophile.

He adds so much unnecessary graphical sex scenes that it makes you wonder what kind of fucked up fantasies he has.

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>>82230901
>thinking It can be a single film

>>82232056
Yes, Stephen, your spoopy clown fantasy aint that complicated

>>82228535
no

>>82231028
Will they ever re-make The Stand as a trilogy of feature length films?

>>82232125
Have you read it?

>>82227408
They're doing another Firestarter? I actually thought the Firestarter tv sequel was pretty good. The Shop shit is cool

>>82232241
No he didn't. He just watched the mini series and thought it was one movie and thinks every adaptation thereafter should be just like it. Even though the only reason anyone still cares about the mini series is Tim Curry's performance.

>>82232241
I have. Over saturated as hell. There's like 8-10 important scenes yet it's over 1000 pages. Even The Stand has more, though that's needlessly long too.

>>82229350
Leaked trailer where?
Can't find shit on youtube

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>>82227408

Why does King look like that guy from Hannibal who cut his own face off?

>>82232232
For the last three years has been a ton of talk of adapting The Stand but every time it seems close to happening it hits a wall. First it was going to be a 3 hour movie, then it was going to be 4 movies, then it was going to be an 8 episode miniseries, then they abandoned the miniseries idea. A year ago they said it would be 2 movies but we haven't heard anything since.

>>82227408
Really looking forward to Gerald's Game, and I'm interested in what Castle Rock will be. If they're careful, it could be the GOAT King adaptation

>>82227408
>Gerald's Game (2017)
I hope they keep the sexy Daddy/Daughter scene.

>>82232493

Those books are miniseries only for me. I thought the one with Sinese was fine. I guess they could redo it with modern tech and gore it up a bit, but the other was serviceable.

>>82233345
I think The Stand could work as on the big screen but it would have to be a trilogy. A single 3 hour movie would be way too short.

>>82233448

I don't think there is enough in it for 3 movies. They'd have to do massive changes to structure it to work in a theater. Hell, I like the book, but I would not pay 40+ bucks to see it, not to mention the time lapsing in between.

>>82233789
What about 2 movies?

>>82228535
It's an okay detective novel. Nothing special but not terrible either. If you've already read all of Stephen King's good novels and like detective stuff then give it a shot.

>The Dark Tower (August 4, 2017)

What the shit? I thought this was still years away with the casting not even finalized.

>>82235766

The trailer for it looks beyond awful.

>>82235799

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vZfiB4L7_vg

Yeah that looks pretty goddamn terrible.

Damn shame such a great casting for the man in black is going to waste, too.

>>82228546

His philtrum height (distance between upper lip and bottom of nose) is of the charts!

A normal Philtrum is between 9 and 13 millimeters.

His is over 25 mm...which is horribly deformed... this trait is shared with chips and gorillas

>>82227408
>>82228546

He's literally a fucking Reptilian.

>>82227408
>The Mist (2017)
Haven't been following recent developments, but I've been looking forward to this for a while. Has to be better than that disgrace of a movie...

>>82235986
Wait, what the fuck - Was the Gunslinger always black?
I remember a grizzled old white guy who looked like he came straight out of an old western.

>>82237176

Roland is literally described as looking like Clint Eastwood and King admits that Clint was the inspiration for him.

>>82237244
Just fuck my shit up, senpai.

Isn't there a disabled black woman in there, anyway (who is strong, rich and independent)?

>>82237303

Yes but she is not in the movie.

>>82233345
>I thought the one with Sinese was fine
Literally the only bad scene he did was the one where he had to pretend King could act and I can't blame him

>>82228535
its a comfy read like most King novels -- good for a half hour on the train home from work, etc

his miniseries about the jfk assasination was quite good

>>82227408
dark tower should get good reviews and profit

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>>82232317
>Tim Curry's performance.
I went in expecting the clown to be approachable like my internet friends told me. Instead all I got was a chainsmoking pedophile. He sounds straight up evil from the get go. No child would feel at ease around that. 4chan lied to me.

>>82227408
>There's also a Castle Rock TV show in the works. Will it be the beginning of a Stephen King cinematic universe?- 55 posts and 8 image replies shown.
It will be Jar Jar up to his old tricks. He's a vampire.

>>82242734
Oh yeah, I forgot that J.J. is involved.

>>82237173
What a coincidence, I literally just finished watching it
It was meh, but it did leave me wondering what happened to the town

>>82235986
I just died a little inside, for fucks sakes there is none of this shit in the book

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>>82235986
THIS ISN'T THE GUNSLINGER WHATHT TEUIHF;XKJCFJGLKSJG

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Who should play adult Beverly? Reminder: they can't be fat.

>>82227408
there is also dozens of film students who are given the rights for stephan king stories for their student films for $1

there are so many king movies and adaptions.

>>82228546
I didn't know pedophiles had specific physical traits. Your knowledge would be extremely useful to law enforcement, anon.

Goodreads top horror list
>Stephen King
>Joe Hill
>Joe Hill
>Stephen King
>Stephen and Owen King
>Joe King

This and seeing King's stupid fucking name on the cover of any horror novel worth a damn that comes out these days pisses me the fuck off

>>82236816
We lookism now

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>>82228546
Me? A pedo?

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>>82228546
His son looks like eve more of an idiot pedo

>>82246900
Retarded people tend to like boys.

>>82237176
>>82244609
>>82246108
Surprise! The geniuses at Sony decided to do some alternate universe shit instead of simply adapting the first Dark Tower novel. Now you get to enjoy a steaming pile of shit that's nothing like The Dark Tower. I'm sure it'll be a box office smash. :^)

>>82247136

It's not an alternate universe, it's a sequel.

>>82247157
You sure? I swear I read somewhere that The Dark Tower movie is gonna be some alternate universe shit.

>>82246867

Don't be so triggered.

>>82247306

A while back King was promoting the movie and he tweeted a picture of the Horn of Eld with the words "This Time Around", and considering the book ends with Roland finding the Horn that all but confirms this takes place after he goes through the door.

>>82227408
>It: Part 1
>It: Part 2
fuck this gay earth

>>82247359
What's the problem?

>>82227408
So at that age my peers were having sex? God damn it.

>>82229543
Well it's not even a straight up adaptation. It's explicitly been said to be a sequel to the books. It's a new cycle so similar things will happen but not necessarily they did before. But the events of the books still happened prior to Roland getting sent back in time at the end. The movie is supposed to pick up from that. THat's why they used a pic of the horn to promote the movie and said he wouldn't have it.

>>82247624

People are tired of movies being split up for the bucks.

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>>82235986
The funny thing is that one of the biggest issues that takes place during the series is the relationship between Roland and Detta, and how their race comes into play.

The movie adaption totally shits on that now. I love Idris Elba as much as the next guy, but I think he was horribly mis-cast for this role, even if they got King's blessing

>>82247663
It is over 1,000 pages long. It's one of the few novels that should be split into multiple films.

>>82247793

>biggest issue
>Resolved in the second book

>>82247807
>implying it doesn't come up in literally every book after that

>>82247800

So make a 3 hour movie.

>no, we'll make 2 90 minutes ones

>>82247859
We got a 3 hour adaptation of It in 1990 and it wasn't very good. Well, the first half is good but everything falls apart in the second half. Anyway, there was a ton of great shit that was unjustly cut from the old adaptation of It. A proper adaptation of It should be at least 4 hours long. In an ideal world, Netflix or HBO would make an 8-10 episode miniseries that adapts almost everything from the novel. But that will never happen now.

>>82246867
>Joe King
Hol up, is Stephen's son seriously that popular? I've never heard of him before.

>>82228546
>Stephen is so fucking ugly it's scary
He was born to be a horror writer.

>>82247855
>implying it has any relevance to the main story whatsoever

>>82235766
>casting not even finalized

Where have you fucking been? It's been finished filming for months now.

>>82247157
It's been confirmed to be a sequel that takes place in the next cycle after Roland travels back in time at the end