WHY DON'T YOU GET A JOB!

My friends got a girlfriend and he hate that bitch
He tells me every day

>>82143684
based

*throws envelope at your head*

*steeldrum playing in the background*

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... our Graham the resident pedo is on the show...

>>82143669
why dont you not cheat on your wife and destroy your family all for some slag nanny

why is your new series so shit

>>82143737
gary glitter looking motherfucking

>>82143782
He'd literally beat Gary Glitter in a Gary Glitter lookalike competition.

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>>82143684
How do you do, fellow kids?

Put something on the end of it.

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>>82143836
Do you want to see my pog collection? Maybe my dracco heads?

Not sure what this is but fuck you
You don't know me

>>82143891
Nah, i'm kinda down since my Tamagotchi died

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>>82144071
Here, I bought you Psycho to cheer you up.

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>>82144361
Thanks, he can be friends with my Scuba Attack Skeletor.

Is Jeremy Kyle kino?

https://youtu.be/oB0hfZtEbOY

>>82144488
Hey Skeletor, for this mission against He-Man you will need to strap these spinning metal blades to your body, do you want them next to your feet?

Okay, where?

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HOW ABOUT YOU STOP MAKING EXCUSES, GET OFF YOUR BACKSIDE AND DO WHAT'S RIGHT FOR YOUR OWN CHILDREN?

>>82144620

*CLAPPING INTENSIFIES*

I'm a pretty mild-mannered guy, limp wristed LibDem voting college dropout stoner type now working a lazy office job, never thrown a punch in my 30 years of life. But I can't watch more than 30 seconds of this cunt without wanting to glass him.
How does he do it?

>>82144573
Put your shoes on, walk into a bank and say you want to be a manager.

It's that easy when you get up off your backside.

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>Its a Pep Guardiola episode

>>82144651
Why don't you go to a bank
IN A BODY BAG

>>82143737
>*disdain for plebs*

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I guess here's your answer

>>82144683
*calls forth ten security guards*
What, are you a big man? Sit down and get a job, little boy.

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>>82144361
>>82144488
Original Lion-O with light-up eyes checking in.

I'm trying Jeremy. I've been getting interviews once every week or fortnight at least. But so far none of them have led to anything.

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if jeremy had any qualities besides extreme shekel lust, he would euthanise the dregs that he parades and mocks on daytime tv

>>82143669

Why don't you tranny Mason freaks fuck off back to Hell? Life is full of questions.

>>82143669
Because I'm retired, kid.

http://www.mirror.co.uk/tv/tv-news/jeremy-kyle-guest-says-made-5110530

>Jeremy Kyle guest says he was made to wear shabby tracksuit so Jezza could mock him

>>82143669
why should i

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>>82144735
Hammerhead hand puppet reporting for duty.

Yeah but, right, at the end of the day right, I love my kid right but she wastes all the money I send her on drink.

get a job? get a job? oh sure let me just put on my job helmet and climb into my job cannon that shoots me into jobland where jobs grow on jobbies!

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>>82144848
Biker mouse from Mars reporting in.

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>>82143669
You have a job?

Do you think he has ever fucked on of the guests? I'm sure they'd be up for it as well

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>>82144947

>>82143669
I'm literally at my job right now

>>82144641
>lib dem voter
kys

>>82145132
>lays

You lie in bed. You lay traps. You lay eggs.

>>82145413
They were actually an appealing party to an 18yo looking to continue education, m8. Times change.

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>>82143669

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>It's a Dr Who crossover episode

>>82146690
Not a cheat if he didn't act on it desu

I have severe social anxiety that's why

VULGAR PLATITUDES

YELLED LOUDLY!!

The show.

>>82147629
That's what I keep telling the dole too.

>>82147709
I do though, I'm on medication and I'm exempt from job search.

>>82147751
Not him but how bad does it have to be to get medication?

>>82147806

not him but I imagine it would have to be something like this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q5AkBBQWZR4

>>82147806
You can go to the doctor and say you're depressed yada yada and you'll get a sicknote and pills. Give the dole the sicknote, bin the pills, put your feet up, and watch the world go by. Ahhhhhhhhhhh

>5,524 USD has been deposited into your account

>>82144666
fucking christ

>>82147913
>USD
Get out of here ameritard. Jezza threads ain't for you.

HIDE IT NOW!

PUT SAMMIN' ON THE END OF IT

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Americans must watch this show and think fucking hell those Brits are ugly fuckers.

>>82147871
Fucking Lynn can't shut the fuck up.

>>82143669
A lot of people can't because jobs are becoming more scarce, and leftovers are low-paying and/or taken by illegal works or work visas.

And it will only get worse as automation becomes more prevalent. Meanwhile, both parties will continue to ignore it until the next few generations will have to pay for our generation and above ignoring that it's coming.

>>82148210
Dude, it's a rhetorical question. No need to get all DEEP in this mo fo.

>>82148210
It really depends where you live. There will always be work, like you said, the immoral ways to earn money (hoarding and market fixing, etc) will always exist.

>>82148210
>leftovers are low-paying and/or taken by illegal works or work visas.
And the employers expect unrealistic experience for that pay level.

>>82148210
Finish College.

another good thread about to be ruined by /pol/tards

why don't you just fuck off? I'm from /sp/ but you don't see me shoehorning football into every fucking thread on every board

>>82148367
You do realize that the majority of college degree holders are very much underemployed below their education level, correct? Jobs are magically springing up to meet the demand. If every person in the country got a college degree, that doesn't mean jobs are suddenly available for all of them.

>>82148448
>realize
it's time to leave

>>82148384
Football is irrelevant.

>>82148448
>If every person in the country got a college degree, that doesn't mean jobs are suddenly available for all of them.
If anything it'd just make things worse, since employers would start to expect people to have a degree, for jobs which really don't require one, which is what a lot already do.

>>82143891
>madcaps
>pogs

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>ameriniggers
>people


ugly cunts

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>>82144781
What the fuck is the thing

>>82148335
There will always be "work", but overall quality of life will continue to go down for 90% of the country further and further as wages continue to stagnate (and older higher paying jobs, and even many lower paying ones, are replaced by automation).

I hate Trump, but a lot of middle America didn't vote for him because they're racist (despite what some like to say). A lot of middle America was fucked over the past several decades, and we never fixed it.

At some point in the next couple decades, things will reach a level where people will start getting violent and things will get really ugly. Not exactly a future I'd like to see for the next generations. People are only civil to a certain point, up until things get bad enough that personal lines get blurred and broken.

>>82148535
>>82148545
>triggered bong

>people don't realize how easy it is to start your own businesses these days
>instead they can't comprehend not working for someone else

>>82148501
>since employers would start to expect people to have a degree
It's kind of a little bit there already. Employers have ridiculous requirements, because the pool is filled with kids all with college degrees with nothing to really differentiate them.

Because we had a few decades of counselors telling every kid "you need a college degree", with no mind for trades or other work. Then government got involved with student loans and crap, and everything ballooned to ridiculous levels money-wise.

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>realize

>>82148477
>>82148673
your autism is leaking
you need to take a step back, nobody else cares

>>82148545
Dr Zaius out of costume.

>>82148708
not them, but fuck off yank cunt

>>82148032
Yeah, Jerry Springer was famous for his 10/10 guests...

>>82148210
>>82148649
Both my parents are in their 60s and work 12 hour shifts for minimum wage, what you're telling me is I should just kill myself now correct?

AT THE END OF THE DAY, RIGHT?

>>82150966
ah luv 'em to bits

'We asked you "___? You said no, Why did you say 'no''?
'Because I was lying of course you fucking retard'

>>82151576
This test says you were telling the ttttr.... LIE!

*audience boos*

*Brings up pre-recorded baby footage to guilt-trip guests*

>>82143669
I WON'T PAY, I WON'T PAY-AH, NO WA-A-AY

>>82150966
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=48HUdzoKiPA

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>>82143891
>>82144071
>1999 was 40 years ago

"What would it mean to you, if he was your son?"
"Nothing Jezza, you fucking stupid cunt. What else am i meant to say?

YOU SMOKE CANABIS DONT YOU? DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE SIDE EFFECT OF CANABIS IS?! PARANOIA

>>82152232
*leans in close and quietly tells you you're a waste of space and how she can do better than you*
now get off my stage
*audience applauds

ITS CALLED THE JEREMY KYLE SHOW, IM TALKING, SHUT UP AND SIT DOWN

>>82143669
I seriously hate this cunt,
fuck him

>>82152288
OH HERE WE GO, IT'S THE KYLE OLYMPICS

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STEEEEEVE, THIS CANT BE HAPPENING IM IN CHARGE HERE

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*unsheaths Steve-tana*
*teleports behind you with Lie detector results*
Pshhh-this test says you're a liar kid

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... Janet's Boyfriend Gary is on the show!!!...

*Gary comes on shouting*

*cuts to camera shots of Jeremy's frowning face, with beeped audio of swearing and boos on stage*

*camera cuts back, a chair has been knocked over. Steve has Gary in a full-nelson*

...Get him outta here get him of my stage!!!!!

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>>82152544
Fuck me, you got it spot on

We asked Mark, apart from the 2 people Lucy knows about have you passionately kissed anybody since the start of the relationship.
You said no, why did you say no?

>>82152826
tellin the troof

>>82152826

This test says... Mark, you are indeed Lucy's biological father

>>82143684
BASED
A
S
E
D

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Have you ever been in a relationship with a thieving no-toothed alcoholic with several STD's who steals your shit while you're at work?

..Or maybe you're a woman who was raped and kept the kid, and now your Husband is struggling to raise the kid as his own knowing he'll never love it?

If so you can contact the show at.. 0800..

>>82152875
This test sayss........

>>82152923

You're a dirtt liar, and if i were you love id run for the hills because this man doesnt have an ounce of respect for you and doesn't deserve a woman as good as you

This shit is too accurate, it's freaking me out

>>82153040
It's more accurate than his lie detector, anyways

There's quite a lot of human scum in Blighty dontcha know

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*blocks your path*