What happens when the guy gets hard?

Saltpeter.

Suckie

he puts his peepee in her vagina

>>81566527
They let him sit in the trailer and look at porn

Also when you see someone naked enough it doesn't automatically make you hard

Maybe they stop getting erections when the women become hairy from not shaving

>>81566591
Thats when the real men get hard

He uses it to test which way the wind's blowing.

>>81566527
Protein for 6 days

>>81566581
Beside the point. Boners happen, sometimes for no damn reason at all.

>>81566527
They're all on roids, they can't get hard without viagra.

I would really hope i got hard, if not i would be fucked, not in the literal sense. i'm an extreme grower, like my dick is 1-2 inches(depending on the temperature etc) soft and 7 inches hard. It's insane the look of relief on girls faces when my dick goes from soft to hard for the first time. Really made me realize how awful life must be for guys with a micropenis. I'm pretty sure i had a couple girls almost walk out on me before my dick got hard.

Guys being more shallow then women is a meme, they are awful people. Seriously having a micropenis must be the worst possible thing for a guy. Even if you get a bunch of money and convince some whore to gold dig you, if you have a micro penis i bet she never fucks you and cheats constantly. Then divorces you and takes half.

>>81566645
When you're between 14 and 24

>>81566683
Aaaaaand a pastais born.

>>81566691
t. beta virgin

>>81566676
Steroids (most) make you hard af. It's when you cycle off that the problems begin

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>>81566683
>Really made me realize how awful life must be for guys with a micropenis.
Only for men who desire to give pleasure to a girl.

>they don't know
they get some sort of injection in their pubic area to stop it
The same thing happens in films if the cock block sock doesn't work for the actor

>>81566581
Seeing a semi attractive woman naked in person would absolutely give me a boner.

>>81566740
>implying you can even find a Fin
Their entire country is afflicted with crippling autism

>>81566718
Not him but I'm 26 not a virgin and I never get random boners anymore

mhmm nookta mhmmm

I have a use for you

>>81566780
Its different when you see them all the time

>>81566808
You might want to get that checked out. I'm 32, married and I still get random boners all the time and wake up with one everyday.

>>81566833
I always get morning wood and rock hard erections around my gf so I ain't worried

>>81566527
He chases the girl around with it until it goes down again

I only jerk off exclusively to hentai porn nowadays.

>>81566527
>being able to get hard around a girl

fuck off normie shit

>>81566602
You like mustaches?

benis'd

I wonder if they ever start fucking like wild animals. Being out there naked in the wild probably activates some primal instincts

>>81566823

Be very care... ful now.

>>81566728
Yeah, that's why the most common thing bought together in Thailand pharmacies is Tren and Viagra.

>>81566982
not the married ones but maybe the single ones, I mean people go on the show thinking sex is possible

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>>81566607
>>81566956
_K_E_K_!_

>>81566527

I think the producers of naked and afraid sometimes pair people up just to fuck with them. The guys that go out there that won't cuddle for warmth are really cruel and shouldn't be out there in the first place and every time I see a guy fall short and fail, usually because they're stupid and keep using energy when they're not eating, it's really embarrassing for all guys.

Like last week when that skinny tall guy tapped out on that chick like a week before they were done. I kept thinking she was perfect partner to get stuck with and all he had to do was ride it out and he just burned out.

It's really weird sometimes. Most of the time women come in with less usable skills for the environment than the guy and she was basically a survival scientist, she was figuring out tons of useful shit to build and he pussied out.

>>81566645
Not when you're cold hungry and trying real hard not to die.

>>81566744
> this sock isn't working for me... maybe you can just jab a needle in my dick

>>81567018
my favorite episode was this survival specialist female and this lazy fatass stuck in the desert next to an oasis and the fat guy sat in the shade for a month while the female bitched at him for being lazy. The girl ended up passing out from heatstroke two weeks in and the fat guy just rode it out in the shade

>>81566999
You're a fucking idiot. I've done roids before, I know what they do or don't, for the most part. You're just some goof on the internet

>>81567129

I know the episode you're talking about and it was hilarious, when she got super hungry her real thoughts were all spilling out and I was like, that is really refreshing. The mask comes off and you can see what they really think. Then she realized how bad it made her look and she apologized.

>>81566744

Chemical castration for movies and shit, I can understand if you keep having to do movies with love scenes but come on, you're not going out into wilderness for a month, there is no way they're going to fuck themselves up then basically starve for weeks.

>>81566527
>ITT 13 year olds wondering if they'll ever be able to control their boners
Trust me, once you hit a professional level of mindset you won't get boners randomly

is this kino? dling season 1

>>81567146
>You're a fucking idiot.
>I've done roids before
And I'm the fucking idiot, LOL.

>>81567195
>>81567108
The most basic of blood pressure pills can make it damn near impossible to have an erection if you have normal BP to begin with.

>>81566527
nothing, unless you're an amerifat, then you get thrown into hell and have to watch rosie o'donell get penetrated by roseanne barr

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>>81566527
>naked and afraid
>girl is clearly wearing a bra

>>81566858

>only gets erection around his gf

ahahha what a faggot

>>81567329
My favorite type of retard here: the know nothing know-it-all.

Listen, let the real men live life while you sit back and watch your fucking tv shows and animes. It'll help you forget what a spineless pussy you are

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>>81566683
Ha, yeah. dicklets will never learn.

>naked and afraid
>neither of them is naked
I bet they gave the guy a cup or something under his loin cloth since they're clearly not even committing to their premise.

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>that fucking bigfoot episode

>>81567398
>calls others spineless pussies
>hates himself so much for not being a real man that he injects liquid Jew into his ass to become one in hopes his father will come back and tell him he's a good little boy and everything will be ok

>>81567340

Do you see how often they starve out there and go down for simple shit like nutrient loss? There is no way any company would allow them to go on a medication that would fuck them up.

Same reason they always have stand by medical teams, I just don't see it happening and they've already shown behind the scenes stuff where chicks are talking about dudes dick so honestly, I just don't believe it.

>>81566645
They become way less frequent after puberty. By your mid 20s your sex drive will find an equilibrium and stop making you randomly horny throughout the day. You still get morning wood but that's about it as far as unwanted uncontrollable boners.

>>81566782
Jokes on you, I live with a Finish girl, we've been together for 5 years.

We met on WoW :^)

>>81567398

He's saying your ego allowed you to delude yourself into doing chemicals that permanently damaged yourself.

Vanity and insecurity are not hallmarks of masculinity, you deluded yourself into doing that and you're still in denial when you defend the behavior. Accept that you made a mistake.

>>81567518
>permanently damaged yourself.

How? All my bloods are perfect. I did it safely and carefully. Do you know what you're even talking about? And life isn't a competition to see who lives the longest; quality matters, and testosterone improves it.

>>81567468
And you're just the picture of health and masculinity, right?

> liquid Jew

Oh, you're one of those retards

>>81567517
How is the sex with your girl (male)?

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>Is that really as big as it gets anon?

>>81567129
>>81567164
Sounds fascinating. Where can I watch this?

>>81567613

Your thinking is what led you to do that in the first place, much like a drug addict rationalizing his behavior.

Nobody is telling you how to live your life, but stop acting like your doing yourself or others, favors by espousing nonsense that has a likelihood of physically changing your body.

I've been playing sports all my life and working out my entire life and have never needed to cycle, and many others do the same shit.

It's a choice and one that is looked down on unless you're trying to look like a freak.

>>81567613
>And life isn't a competition to see who lives the longest;
Why not just spend all the money you can get your hands on right now and kill yourself then? Clearly that would be the most efficient way to proceed.

>>81567699
Bigger than your you fucking bitch ill jam this wood pike so far up your cunt THEN you'll be saying "look at my big wood"

>>81567622
It's a girl(female) and it's pretty nice.

>>81567784
can you post her pusy?

>>81567129
my fave episode is the one where the guy, knowing nothing of the woman's life, correctly called her out on being raised with a maid and she got super defensive (cause it was a housekeeper, not a maid) and it all related to her mom.
She finally sucked it up, admitted she was being a fucktard, and started pulling her weight.

I also enjoy the ones where the girls are into the guy, but he's gay. She might look hot naked, and be around a naked guy with a big dick 24/7, and she still aint gettin laid.

If i were on the show Id run away as fast and far as possible into the jungle. Come back at night killing the camera crew one by one.
And hunt the bitch like the Predator. One night she swears she sees me. I throw a spear hitting Billy. Later that night his corpse disappears, consumed by the jungle.
One by one.
They start setting up traps. Fuckin hell like they'll get me like that. I stay away from large hanging logs.
It's raining and they hear shit. One of my wild boars is set loose, to sacrifice hisself on a trap. Fuckin lightning strikes, they see me as I fuckin roar at them. I've got billy's fuckin toes n thumbs on my face, my mandibles. His fingers and other body parts as my make-shift dreadlocks.
I fuckin rape someone on live tv mates

>>81567803
I mean I could, but that wouldn't prove anything.

>>81567912
im just so horny

>>81567896
Now THAT'S a show I can watch!

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>If I was stuck in the wilderness naked with another woman she wouldn't even snuggle to keep warm let alone have sex with me

>>81567896
Everyone cryin and Im just standin on tree branches yelling out, shooting my shot like a shoulder blaster but it kinda just dribbles out by my knees but its ok because im the fookin predator

>>81567731
>espousing nonsense that has a likelihood of physically changing your body

Lol that's the whole point (yeah I did get what you meant).

The reason I got mad in the first place is because this >>81566999 guy was speaking nonsense he knows nothing about.

To each their own, I guess. I did no permanent damage though, I'm 99% sure.

>>81567741
I'm done speaking to the stupid

>>81567731
>unless you're trying to look like a freak

You'll never make it with this attitude. Now I very much doubt you even lift.

>>81567613
>And life isn't a competition to see who lives the longest
that is literally what life is
if you die you lose

>>81567699
>>81566527
what the fuck is the point of this show on a network that censors nudity

>>81567129
livin the dream

>>81568142
TV-equivalent of clickbait, because nudity==sex

>>81566574
what does that mean?

>>81567803
>>81567935
Based Pusyposter.

>>81567714

episode is called Dunes of Despair, chicks name is Honora.

and for life of me, I just checked like 6 sites and everyones links are all messed up so having a hard time finding it at the moment.

Why don't I find any women attractive anymore? I used to be a walking boner and now nothing

>>81568142
>>81568160
Yeah, its ratings are probably 80% young teenagers sneaking off to the less used TV room to watch it because they saw the title in the channel guide.

>>81568201
How do you type? Do you use a cluster of pubic strands? Please donate your body to science. I've never seen a walking sentient erection.

>>81568201
4chan made you gay, many such cases.

Alternatively you're a low-T cuck and steroids/lifestyle changes that facilitate testosterone production would do you wonders.

>>81568082

I workout to stay in shape, I never got into it to look better.

Being 6'8, my insecurities ran a different way, I never needed to lift to get big or have to prove myself that way.

by sixteen I could leg press 1k, I was doing 350s in bench (I avoided deadlift, clean, most of the other advanced lifting things, honestly) and I could get close to 400 but honestly, I was pretty happy where I was and to be honest speed was prioritized over strength since I was already big for my age.

My point is pushing your personal views on people is shitty when you know deep down your own insecurities lead you to wanting to reshape yourself.

>>81568100
That's wrong. I'd rather live fully and die at 60 than make it to 90 as some lonely shut-in

>>81568201
Porn and ageing. You should start getting into expensive alcohol. They say taste experiences and the effect of alcohol are some of the few things that are as enjoyable when you're old as when you're young.

Anyone else really like women but prefer to see them in clothes as opposed to naked?

sure, I like a nice smooth axilla and contoured necks as much as the next guy but I must admit I enjoy clothed women more. A nice tight skirt is sexier than that same woman just sauntering around naked.

If anything shows like this have made me double down on this belief.

>>81568359

if you're a lonely shut in on the inside it doesn't matter what everyone else believes because you're always going to be alone in your head and it will turn your behaviors into same repetition that your trying to escape. Relationships become monotonous. Work is a routine, and only person you're lying to is yourself.

Acting like you're better than some neet but you're going to end up in exact same place regardless and shoving your existential dilemma onto some random anon is a dick thing to do.

>>81568294
Highly unlikely that a long-limbed guy like a 6'8"er had lifts like that. Almost impossible without you being a complete genetic freak. With that size and power combo how were you not a basketball, baseball or football recruiters wet dream. And all this at 16! Shaq couldn't do this at that age, or maybe ever. I call absolute bullshit on these claims

>>81568444
Whatever dude, live your life how you want, idk.

>>81568408
I prefer seeing a woman in one of those really short sleeved shirts that cover only a little bit of the upper arm, with armpit hair poking out, than just seeing her flaunt her pit hair, so yeah.

>>81568294
So you're genetically within the top .001% of people and hit most people's natty limit at the age of 16 - of course you don't need to fucking cycle. But what about the androgynous pencil wristed 5'6 dude who struggles with benching 85 lbs when he's 6 months into weight lifting? Would you look down on him for wanting to compensate for the utter garbage genetics he was handed?

>My point is pushing your personal views on people is shitty

please have even the slightest amount of fucking self awareness if you're going to post here

>>81568408

very few of the women look attractive after they go full holocaust mode by week 2.

Some of the women you can see their spines and ribs through their backs and that always messes with me. It's hard to be attracted to literal walking skeletons. And because most guys bulk up before going out, they figure they can just weather it while women can't do that as well.

The first episode this season was hilarious like that. She was all over that dude and wouldn't let up, it was like getting yelled at by your mom and gf at same time and he just tuned out for about two weeks.

>>81567129
>>81567164
Here's part of it https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BhwJuG12Ooc

why do the girls finish more often than the men?

>>81568450

I was being scouted for D1, I was playing basketball for gym because some of the coaches liked to run skrimmages during the day so I got out of classes I didn't like when they wanted to run shit during school hours.

I dove out of bounds and cracked my ankle trying to save it and had go to doctor to get x-rays, and they found a cyst in my foot.

They had to cut it out and by time first surgery was over with, because of my size they gave me an extra bone graph, but that basically killed my momentum and doctor wouldn't release me because he was worried my arch would collapse, so I was looking into military and sports at same time and it killed both.

I ended up needing a second surgery to remove the extra-bone graph and put my foot back the way it was before.

I did atkins the first time I was down and I actually lost something like 60 to 70 pounds, because family was worried I would balloon up moon booting it around.

>>81568607
nice blog post

>>81568408
I kind of get you. Like, a lot of times I think a girl pulling tits out of a bikini is hotter than just taking it off altogether. And an upskirt revealing girly panties can be hotter than just having her walk around with nothing down below but a thong. There's a lot at play psychologically. There's the forbidden aspect, and also the fact that clothes are designed to flatter, and when they come off you're left with a vaguely defined mass of flesh. Even a sash or something helps break up the mass.

>>81568190
https://youtu.be/awF3dMC57Vk?t=183

>>81566782
Some of us are right here in this thread.

>>81568650
>breasts so big they have to blur them from behind
>blur
show is pointless

>>81568706

I honestly got into the show because I was curious about survival skills and a lot of the contestants showed a wide array of skills depending on environment.

cassidy flynn most qt girl

too bad she couldnt complete the challenge

>>81568727
You'd think they'd put uncensored episodes online, and only take contestants who agreed.

>>81568650
Them medic titties.

>>81568650
>Americans blur the BACK of boobs
holy fuck haha

>>81568768

I enjoy watching to see whose bullshitting and just out there to get on a tv show and those that put time and dedication in to prepping to be there.

Some people come up with good ideas like building feet calluses up to toughen the feet up since going out shoes for a long time creates breaks in the skin make it really shitty to walk on.

Which is also why I had a lot of respect for creepy rat lord guy coming up with cordage to make shoes. He has a weird affect but he knew his shit.

>>81568607
>they found a cyst in my foot.

Funny, I just used Google to find out what this hard, bb like thing was just under my ball skin, and I found out it's a cyst

>>81568727
the problem is that a lot of these people are still pretty retarded despite their "survival skills". And the funny thing is that the guys who are REALLY good at survival are treated like psychopaths. Like that guy who set up a million traps and killed enough rats to last them a month. Guy was awesome but the girl was a dick to him

When I'm staying at my grandmother's I have zero internet access.

Not ashamed to admit I fapped to this show.

>>81568930

Well I don't know about all that but a bone cyst can turn into cancer, so they were worried I'd lose my foot.

>it's a no food and ready to tap out and a random turtle appears episode

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>>81566718
>>81567392
I forgot how much I love this board

>>81568957

That's the guy I was talking about, Rat Lord. he's also on the first season of Naked and Afraid XL, he seemed much more mellow and less weird there.

I mean he did act pretty weird so I understand but women that are into survival and nature and stuff tend to vary from like military chicks to hippies and are all more or less normalish even if they're bitches.

I think the personalities attracted to this stuff tend to be loners. So like us, they tend to be a little weird from the get go.

Women just get off easier because usually they're pretty and well..we're guys. We get brunt of everything.

>>81568962
At...your grandmothers house?

>>81567380
she made it out of the bag

>>81568217
My grandma loves this show, she calls it nekkid and afraid. I think it's because every episode has a same, basic formula

>>81569003

I started noticing this too because of snakes magically always appearing and it really killed it for me.

They started to need to help people because people with actual skills dried up so they started padding seasons with gimmick episodes and that new uncensored episodes and naked and afraid xl and all sorts of shit.

I think they started to not have enough people to do this stuff because people with actual survival skills didn't want to be on their show so they started sending fans and shit to go do it.

It's also a huge timesink to, I think you need to take off a couple of months to go do this.

>>81566858
Same here. I'm 25 now and i never get random boners anymore except when my gf is around. I pop random boners talking to her or touching her (non sexually), but never when she's not around.

Makes me sad honestly, i miss getting rock hard out of nowhere so easily and often as a teen. Makes me realize i'm older, feels bad man.

>>81567380
shes crotchless tho

>>81569057
something else. the bag holds the microphone transmitters

they only use the bag when the dude taps out

>>81566833
This
37 , random boners , and not even horny

whats the point of a tribal style survival show if the woman doesnt get pregnant in the first 5 minutes and survives by eating the protein from the guys cum and left over trash?

>>81568824
Cordage for feet.

Common sense skill

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>>81567896
this place cures my depression

>>81569322

yeah but I think he is only 1 of like 2 people who have ever brought cordage though, so it may be commonsense but as a climber, his skills so far have been pretty unique. in terms of the show.

most people bring cutting tools or mosqito nets or duct tape or stuff like that

>>81566552
mhmm i have a use for you

>>81569369
He bought his own?
What a faggot
A real man (like me) would have just made it

It's not hard to do.

It's practically what all humans did at night before electricity

What does it matter if you get a random boner.

Seriously why would it be "embarrassing"

>>81567896
You should try and sell this.

>>81569447
Cus in the past when humans actually lived like this a man would just rape the nearest female if he was horny.

>>81569436

I thought making cordage out of plant matter was time consuming though?

and yeah he brought his own, he brought a climbers roll and then cut it up to make shoes for the chick and used it for a whole bunch of other stuff, made a deadfall out of their bananas that they found.

>>81569089
Prove it

>>81569509
Depends on what's available eg tree bark has to be boiled etc
When you are good at it you can make about 10mtrs per night

>>81569710

yeah but a lot of times they literally don't have a pot to piss in out there, so they'd have to make something to boil it in.

There was a guy on the Wheel that was making tree/cordage furniture that I thought was pretty neat.

when is it normal to have wet dreams until?

>>81569910
14 at the latest.

>>81569928
wait, for real? I'm 25 and not a virgin and get them like once a month still

>>81569910
I've never had one, I think I jack off too much.

>>81569967
Maybe you don't get enough sex.

>>81570003
that makes sense too

anyone noticed how women never do any hard work? sure they do weaving and maybe they can make fire, but not anything more than that really

>>81570302
What's wrong with that?

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>>81567492
>You still get morning wood but
Not necessarily.

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>tfw only my clothing fetishes get me hard

The excitement before the act of sex might do it but I'll never know as I'll likely die a virgin

>>81567492
>tfw never gotten random boners

>>81569164
better than horny and no boner.

>>81570302
>anyone noticed how women never do any hard work?
because men monopolize this activity by finding purpose through hard work and legitimate themselves as provider

plus women have no problem letting men believe that men matter

>>81566527
It's fake

The version in my country didn't censor.

>>81566527
>naked and afraid
>they're both wearing clothes

what did they mean by this?

>>81566782
I married a Finnish girl. Took me long enough to find one who wasn't insufferable though.

Also, that book isn't worth the walk to the library, it's supposed to be funny, but where's the humour?

>>81566683
I can vouch for this. One morning after a girl said she couldn't believe it was the same dick.

>>81571038
>16 days alone
>Cheers when getting on boat
>Armpits are freshly shaven
Durhur

>>81566683
post pics or gtfo

>>81571570

>>/lgbt/

>>81569164
This
42 here, still got random boners

>>81566527
rape

>>81567896
>One of my wild boars is set loose, to sacrifice hisself on a trap.
hahaha you fucking retard

>>81566683
basically what happened to that amazing atheist faggot

>>81566552
it's a meme I still had to jack it every night in basic

>>81568274
>sentient
Whoa there bud no need to make rash assumptions like that
Also, >>>/r/eddit

>>81566744
I think the threat of having a needle shoved anywhere around my dick would be motivation enough to stay soft

>>81570895
show your boobs

>>81570302
Because men are naturally stronger?

>>81566683

Exact same thing here. Soft, that things barely exists. Hard it's about 6.5-7.

>>81569928
>tfw I havent had any dream in years

Nothing, everything goes black then I wake up. Not a single image or colour.

>>81572780
that's good no do meditation to reduce sleep until you no longer need to sleep

>>81567492
i wonder whats in your diet.

>30+ yo male
>boner city still
>whacking off every day

BONERS, BONERS EVERYWHERE.

at least i stopped watching porn. but seriously at least 3x day bonertown. plus morningwood. plus wake up middle of the night with bone.

CANT STOP ME NOWWWWWWWW

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>>81567896
>this fucking post

>>81566527
Seriously though, I've never watched this show. Do people get laid on it or not? Is a camera on them at all times?

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>>81567492
Low Test

>>81572956
are you a virgin? for me i was still getting this until after i had a girlfriend who i had regular sex with. even when im not sexually active now i dont really get horny out of nowhere anymore.

>>81566602
this

>>81566527
Is it more uncomfortable for a guy to be naked?

>balls are on your crotch
>might scrape scrotum if you sit somewhere rough
>ants can easily reach your balls

>bitches get saggy tits

>>81574074
If you're a chick I'd imagine you'd have to worry about bugs and dirt getting up in your snatch.

>>81574284
do you worry about getting bugs in your anus?

>>81574315
Are you a girl?

>>81574315
The anus is tighter, but yeah I would be concerned about that happening actually.

>>81574315
The anus has a ring you idiot. But it's not just the vagina, UTI is possible as well. It's why they recommend females to wipe towards teh back so shit doesn't get in their vagina/ureter.

>>81567896
Sounds like Richard Laymon came back from the dead and had a child with Jack Ketchum..

>>81574374
i wipe toward to back so shit doesn't get in my penis

>>81574524
It wouldn't because the scrotum acts as a barrier against that shit.

Just imagine (not like it's not there) the film crew in comfy armchairs duel wielding snickers bars and chugging beers silently behind the camera.

>>81574315
>worry

>>81566581
What trailer? This show is about survival retard

>>81574558
>he protects shit from getting in his penis by rubbing it against his scrotum
gross

>>81566552
He puts his peter in salt?

Sounds painful.

>>81566602
Gay men*

>>81574524
pleb

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yecEF0pwJa8

The dutch version is way better

le discussion if frued had merit, ending in a debate on the uses of modern science as a selfexploratory devices

>>81566527
>improvised bra but no panties
why?

>>81566527
Anyone ever notice the woman is always a useless nagging parasite in this show?

>>81566683
Same here. Soft is around 2 inch and hard is 5.5. Nothing special but still a significant jump from flaccid. My ex thought my penis was a micro until I got hard and then she was relieved that i'm painfully average.

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>>81566833
Random boners made high school a hard time.

>>81566691
>14 and 24

14 and 16. who the fuck still gets public boners when they are 24?

>>81575063
Easier to hide the slit than the tit

>>81575554
Me but only if children are around

>>81575611
But the slit is the one that needs protection. Tits can just hang about freely desu.

>>81575292
CARLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOS

>>81567492
I'm 22, been with my gf for 2 years and I'm still masturbating everyday and whatnot. It all depends on your sex drive to be honest.

I get erect when kissing girls but everytime I am nude and engaging in foreplay I dont get hard until actual coitus, what is wrong with me.

Im 25 and I still get boners when I hold a girls hand

>>81575292
I will never udnerstand this
Whenever I got a hard on on highschool I would parade it out with a big fat smile on my face, winking around
Hell, sometimes I would even put down my pants and rock my boxer with it almost coming out

>>81575866
sure you did

>>81575866
t. eastern european

>>81575554
I get random boners and I'm 30.

>>81566527
>naked and afraid
>she's wearing a bra

what kinda fucking shit show is this

>>81576155

virgin detected

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>>81566683
>her: We can wait until you're hard
>me: I'm already hard

>>81566527
eat the dick.

>>81575866
true dat.
all those betas being ashamed of stiffies probably have microdick.

gotta present that schlong for the people to be mirin.

>>81575012
Doesn't work

>>81568650
>woman angry that guy is lazy
>passes out from heat exhaustion
Pottery kino

>>81572780
Stop smoking weed you retard.

>>81566527
just looking at a naked woman doesn't give you a hard-on
you'd know this if you were an adult

>>81576785
t. erectile dysfunction

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>>81570858
I feel you. I have a casual undressing fetish.

I watch porn until the fucking starts

>>81567492

I'm 27 and I get random midday boners at work now and then.

>>81576800
t. THIS IS AN 18+ SITE GET OUT REEE

>>81567340
>Take a blood thinner
>stub your toe
>die from internal bleeding

>>81566683
Having a small dick isn't so bad. I can hold it in my hand really easily

>>81566683

I can attest to being a grower. Except my penis is average when it's soft and huge when it gets hard. I don't get looks of relief, I get looks of amazement.

>>81567492
cuck

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>tfw my peepee only grows to an average 8"x6"
How's a wyte boi supposed to compete?

>not being a shrinker

>>81566683
Being a grower has its perks, you get travel size when you're not in bone mode for increased aerodynamics and ease of movement

>>81577048
I grow weary of cuckposting

>>81566683
pics please?

>>81574524
>Wipes front to back

Lmfao dude no way haha you can't be this fucking dumb haha why would you even do that? Back to front is the only way to go

>>81566683
I'm also 7 and go down to about 2 inches. Are big dicks always growers?

>>81577157
>7
>big

lad...

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>>81577157
>7"
>big dick

>>81567129
That guy must've made all lazy fatasses proud.

>>81566527
Any episodes with obvious sexual tension between the guy n girl?

>>81566780
that will change once you're out of puberty. There's two types of naked and only one of them is the sexual boner inducing type

>>81566683
tfw got grower peepee too

>>81577241
asking for a friend

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>>81566527
>>81566683
Ah yeas, the good ol daily dicksize thread on television and film board

also looking forward to height thread, and balding thread!

>>81571176
>it's supposed to be funny, but where's the humour

there's nothing funny about finnish girls fucking black guys. that's just the reality

>>81577598
You forgot the exceptional 'virgin walk' thread we had this morning

>>81577598
Struck a nerve?

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>>81570858
>>81576819
>drinking with a girl
>flirting
>she proposes to fuck in a bathroom stall
>I ask no warming? (nor undressing)
>she's like welp too bad
>still a virgin to this day

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>>81577903
>I ask no warming? (nor undressing)
what

>>81569910
That was some awkward shit, glad I'm done with that

>>81577903
>I ask no warming? (nor undressing)
You made that up, right?

Right?

>>81567896
Hahahhahaha

>>81578036
i wish
it will haunt me for the rest of my days

>>81577903
>I ask no warming? (nor undressing)

what did you mean by this

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>>81577903
>bringing back those teenage memories
FUCK YOU I DON'T WANT TO REMEMBER
a-at least i eventually lost my virginity several years later to someone much hotter, right guys?

>>81567912
I know who you are, you britbong.

>>81567896
thanks

>>81578112
foreplay

>>81577903
good, it is not worth it to try to please a roastie

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>>81578276
>bathroom-fuck
>foreplay
holy shit, that anon.

>>81566591
Dumb underaged faggot

>>81566527

chastity cage and they give her the key to wear on her anklet

>>81578036
>>81578112
>>81578113
>>81578348

her proposal caugh completely offward ok?! of course I wanted to fuck. Given the circumstances I could have said something worse to spill my spaghetti out of my pockets.

>>81575292
CAAAAAAAAAAARLOS

>>81578426
you remained unfucked, so you said the worst thing anyway.

>naked
>everything's blurred
Typical American garbage. I bet if one of them got mauled by a lion, they'd show uncensored closeups of the half chewed innards.

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>>81578471

>>81566683
>tfw average benis but huge balls

Sometimes I have trouble sitting down because I have to rearrange them.
Running in anything loose is also out of the question.

>>81576407
>ashamed of microdick
>somehow ashamed of their boners

listen, if you have a microdick and get a boner no one is gonna see it so you have no idea what youre talking about man

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>>81577903
>be 16
>drinking with guy friend and two girls at my place (parents are out of town)
>guy friend and girl #1 are gettjng really touchy and starting to make out
>girl #2 puts her hand on my leg, right next to my dick
>asks me to "show her the bathroom"
>sure, I say
>she goes up the stairs ahead of me so I get a perfect view of her ass
>we get to the bathroom
>"there you go", I say
>turn and leave her standing there with a confused look on her face

>>81567129
Someone make a pepe/wojak edit of this

>>81572248

This
47... pitch tents for no reason randomly.

>>81566527
Why does the girl have a top but no bottoms?

>>81578732
probably she felt like rejected ugly shit unless she had high self-esteem

>>81578732
STOP IT!
STOP MAKING ME REMEMBER MY TEENAGE AUTISM YOU FUCKS

>>81575554
I think you're just unhealthy and low test

>>81577903
don't ask for foreplay
say "put it in your mouth"
if can't get erect, blame alcohol
if she sucked you in a bathroom, she's your bitch, in that she can't claim/think she is too good for you in the future.
fuck her later on boner pills.

>>81567961
>tfw the girl would rather die of hypothermia than sleep close to me

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>>81566527
You squirt it in the bushes, and go on about you business. Not everyone is a virgin like you who can't imagine being naked with other naked people not being aroused like you.

>>81566645
Maybe if you're in high school.

>>81579258
Once she dies, you can do anything with her body.

You both win

>>81567492
32 almost. The closest I get to random boners is when I am sitting down and in that 'falling asleep' mode. In my own experience, post 30, married with 2 kids under 3 I've got a much reduced sex drive. I don't fap every day, nor do I always feel the urge. I'm still at ~4 days a week at least.

>>81567896
10/10

>>81576182
not being a virgin doesnt make boners stop idiot, virgin detected

>>81567896
aussieposting is the best

>>81566527
He learns the true meaning of Naked and Afraid

>>81567492
I get boners when I'm tired or sleepy. Dunno why.

>>81580001
i like how there's literally an entire episode of south park devoted to this

>>81577903
>hurricane sandy
>chilling at a friend's house
>his older sister is there with her friend
>she gets close to me and tries to talk to me, she's a 8/10
>told her that her breath smelled, so I can hang out with my two friends
>girl goes quite and doesn't talk to me for the rest of the night
>friends are fuming that I rejected her and did it such a manner
It's the little things in life that makes it so great, the rage enough was to keep me dying of laughter.

>>81578631
sorry mate, just busting balls, pls don't be sad :<

>>81578732
>"there you go", I say
>turn and leave her standing there with a confused look on her face
getting a severe case of second-hand-cringe

>>81578732
>>81578426
>>81577903
>>81579188
>>81579254
>early adolescense
>several, like several years ago
>watched porn basically 24/7
>low grades because all I do is jack off
>teacher talks with my parents
>parents get me some extra tutoring after class
>they "hire" a qt quiet girl from my school to help me study
>my parents are cheap stakes, anyway
>quiet girl is "innocent and probably is stacked as fuck under that sweater" kind of hot
>she asks me where is the bathroom
>I miss understood that as a sexual invitation
>I take her to the bathroom and I forcefully enter with her
>she pushes me back and is clearly afraid and mad
>I think "she is just acting up, she wants to fuck"
>thanks porno....
>I push her into the wall, lift her skirt and forcefully fuck her until I came, not even out, inside all the way
>by the end she was crying and pissed herself
>oh shit she really wanted to come here to piss
>oh shit she didn't wanted to fuck me?
>I try to apologize but she just storms out of the house
>expected several days, weeks for the police or school to come for me
>never happened

And thats how my teenage autism basically made me do something that I will regret for the rest of my life

I still fap to what happened thought

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>>81580942
jesus christ
...
at least i feel better about all the chances i missed now

>>81580942
that's creepy af
turn yourself in, perv

>>81580942
assuming this isnt made up, it must be awkward if you ever see her again

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>>81580942
what in the world?

>sitting on bus
>its full of people
>have a random erection that you subtlety encourage
>suddenly realize your stop is approaching

what do?

>people call 6 inches "huge" and "average"
I never thought I would learn my penis is huge on a television board

>>81581204
become a ninja

>>81581204
cover it with my fanny pack, duh?

>>81567827
I dont know a lot of gay guys, but I would imagine being sex deprived for a while he would be down. Its like prison sex but opposite

>>81580942
reminder that statute of limitations is 7 years

>>81581259
it's below average, though.

>>81568201
Stop masturbating

>>81581283
What is the average? I'm 8.25 inches hard 5 inches soft and always considered myself average until this thread

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>Show is called "Naked & Afraid"
>Nobody is naked, given basic clothes and tools
>Nobody is afraid because fresh food, water, and medics are on set 24/7, ready to jump in the moment things start going south; being on the show is likely safer than welding at a construction site & many more day jobs

wowee my almonds have never been activated quite like this

>>81581204
I have a decent sized dong and I've got no reason to be ashamed of it. I have been in the situation you describe. I just let my dick be outlined in my trousers, I don't even use underwear when it isn't winter so it really shows when it happens. But if someone looks at my crotch that's their problem. Don't be such autistic spergs /tv/, it's just a boner.

>>81580942
The odds are good that she fantasizes about it too if she didnt turn you in or even say anything

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>>81580942
ITT: things that neve happened

>>81581354
I'm a little over 9 inches erect, around 5 1/2 soft. I always thought around 7 or 8 erect was average.

>>81581131
Is not made up, I was just horny 24/7, she was female and my judgment was blurred because of the porn.

Like, EVERYTHING she did or said I took it as some sexual invitation no matter how unrelated it was and I had a gigantic boner the whole time, when my parents went out for groceries and she asked me where was the bathroom I was like "YES SHE WANTS TO FUCK"

I genuinely believed she was just playing hard to turn me on like they did in several porno movies I saw.
All the things she said like "no, please stop, it hurts, etc" during the act just made me harder.

All I know is that she moved out of town with her grandmother by the end of the year according to one of my friends back then, she and I werent close or in the same class, we didnt even speak before my parents hired her.
It was just some casual forced sex because I was an idiot, I just hope I didnt got her pregnant

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wew lad, /tv/ is normalfag central
fuck this board

>>81580942
you should find her and fuck her again

>>81581554
If she was shouting no then I rescind my assertion that she might have liked it

>>81580942
>literally just straight up rapes his tutor
kek. It didn't happen though.

>>81578747
this
52 here - people still call me the boner champ

>>81574658
He's a big guy

>>81581825
this
I'm 73 and I get like 10 hard ons a day and am hard right now. The good thing about being older is that I can just walk around the supermarket with a stark erection and nobody gives me any business.

>>81581842
for you

>>81567492
>By your mid 20s your sex drive will find an equilibrium and stop making you randomly horny throughout the day.

late reply but 26 here, if I don't jack off in the morning I am almost 100% guaranteed to have boners at around lunch time. For this reason alone everytime if I knew that I have to leave the house for an extended period of time in advance I will have to jack off or risk having others seeing a python coiled up in my pants.

>>81569393
Be very...careful now...