Wrestlemania 33

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I've gotta say, the set looks like something from the future.
Feels weird to live in the future.

>>81184957
Yeah the set looks great, and supposedly that rollercoaster is actually functioning.
we better see aj and shane go on it

>>81184773
GOLLLLLLLDBERRRRRRRG

>goldberg
he sucked even when he was good

>>81184773
>>inb4 /asp/
No nigger, just because you inb4 something doesn't make it true. They made that fucking containment board for a reason, so please go the fuck back.

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>roster only has indy jobbers with no charisma or personality on it
>zero interesting storylines people just have matches for the sake of it
Yeah no thanks, nu-WWE is trash.

>>81185059
>functioning
Have to disappoint you, but we had pictures of the construction sites. You would have needed a lot more to make this rollercoaster functional. It will roll around, sure, but not a lot if at all. You need to get contracts from the city to build one which would be publicly available as well.
It is safe to say that this rollercoaster is not functioning, neither likely is the ring above the ring besides Shane climbing and jumping off it. Which seems to be the case, as it was announced he would do another mega stunt this year. This seems to be it.

>>81184773
The match is going last, it's already been reported that Roman will likely win and that this might be the Undertaker's last match given his severe condition.
I got less of a problem with that as I don't care about either character (and never did since I never watched the show as a child, regarding the Undertaker).
Moreso, the match between Miz and Cena seems to be fun. I don't care much about technical good matches because I'm not a redneck who appreciates some fucking wrestle work this much. I do appreciate, but it's second or third to everything else (the characters, story, etc). Having said that, I liked Mizdow vs Miz, but their matches have been horrible because Sandow really is a rather bad wrestler (moreso than Miz, I would think). Had he been much more of a good wrestler, then their feud would have been much more memorable / all-around great.

Technically, I should be very excited for Jericho vs Owens, but I just don't like Kevin anymore. He's become too stale for me and I don't really care much anymore. Adding to that, wrestlers always talking in the ring about their motivations for 20 minutes is one of the main points as for why such shows are looked down upon and are terrible, stale and boring.

>>81185734
>complaining about a lack of muh soap opera

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FAAAAAAAAAT ASSES

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>>81185651
OP here, /asp/ has been taken over by the fattest autitic mongs. It is no longer safe to post actual wrestling threads there anymore.

>>81185851
yes because thats what makes wrestling wrestling and not just 2 half naked guys fake fighting

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>>81186069
they're predetermined not fake

>>81186175
>nothing connects
>the ones that do are specifically preformed so that the person takes the least amount of damage possible
It's fake.

Carmella's going to win the SD Women's Title, allegedly.

I'm hype as fuck for THE BIG HOG James Ellsworth

>>81184773
I've heard that only people with low iq watch this.

>>81186541

Well, I hear your mum isn't a whore.

Must be a lot of liars in the world.

indy wrestling is the true kino

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>>81186541
i got perfect score from the mensa test and i'm gonna stay up until 6am watching this

>>81184957
Looks like something from an 80s movie about a gameshow where people fight to the death.

>>81186676

Wrong.

The Final Deletion is the true kino.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kiktBcRHABU

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>>81186175
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BvTNyKIGXiI

>>81186781
>tfw you saw matt hardy and brother nero wrestle live
DELETE DELETE

>United States Championship Match
>Wrestlers are both Canadian

>>81184773
Based Big Dog is finna retiring the Undercarder

>>81186837

I'm jealous lad, was it fun?

>>81184773
I'm just tuning in to see Roman Reigns beat the Undertaker, turn full heel and get the biggest boos he will ever receive in his life.

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THE ULTIMATE THRILL RIDE™

I'm looking over the card now, and this seems like one of the worst cards in history.

And what the fuck is a Non-sanctioned match? Isn't Triple H the CEO? Will the match even have a ref?

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>mgw I heard Goldberg was back in the ring

>>81185875
make poppa pump again

Goldberg is bland as fuck.

>>81187088

It's basically a no holds barred match, but more dramatic.

It's non-sanctioned because the story going into it is that Seth Rollins is injury prone, so doctors won't officially clear him for the match. In order to get the match, he signed a contract saying that everything is at his risk, and WWE does not officially sanction the match.

Is Roman still a face?


If he retires Taker as a face I'm gonna punch him

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>>81186930
it was as matt would say WONDERFULL

>>81184773
been watching old wrestling videos all day, to get pumped up for wrestlemania. realize its not nostalgia from when i was a kid. wrestling was alot better 15-20 years ago.
80s everyone was on cocaine and fucking awesome. crazy characters
90s wcw attitude era. lots of skeezy bra and panties matches. big papa pump

new shit is just boring guys with normal names. and terrible plot lines. women's "wrestling"

>>>/asp/

>>81187172
>non sanctioned
>still held in a venue used by WWE in an event held by WWE

how the fuck do people even pretend to like this

>>81187172
>WWE does not officially sanction the match.

This does not make any sense.

>>81187391
>hero of the movie is in a life threatening situation
>still going to save the day in the end

how the fuck do people even pretend to like this?

worldwrestling-->ENTERTAINMENT<--

>>81187391
You can only call a No Holds Barred match so many different things before you run out of ideas. Next year there's going to be a "Geneva convention breaching, technically a war crime" match.

Pageantry is stupid.

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>tfw he still can't go

next year

>>81187391
>>81187411

Kayfabe, you've got to suspend your disbelief a little bit. It is, frankly, dumb as fuck, but it's also fun if you get into it.

This Wrestlemania is also the culmination of the following stories:

>A man who thinks he's a snake and hears voices challenges a cult leader who believes he's imbued with the power of a demonic nun for the main championship title. The snake man burnt down the cult leader's shack.

>A lone wolf fights the town drunk in a feud that has seen the wolf crush the drunk with a forklift.

>A fat canadian and a middle aged canadian fight over the United States title

>A big dog and a undead guy fight to decide who's yard this truly is.

>A man assaults his boss, and is sacked by his boss' assistant. Instead of letting this stand, he's rehired by his boss, who wants to fight him.

>John Cena gets engaged

>>81187665
Yeah...

>>81187714
I hate you for trying to make it sound ludicrous and worthwhile when their characters never show much if any personality and never these things at all. If anything, are just mentioned on commentary once or twice while the actual stories are awful, shallow and sometimes not existing.

>>81187714

top kek describing the shit wwe pukes at everyone

and im still gonna be up til 06 am to watch the whole goddamn thing

>>81187714
this isn't like lucha underground, that shit hardly comes into play.

>>81187714
>>A man who thinks he's a snake and hears voices

Orton?

>A fat canadian and a middle aged canadian fight over the United States title

kek

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>watching NXT on the big TV last night
>Nakamura vs Roode
>dad walks in
>looks at the screen
>'Back in my day we had Andre the Giant. Now you worship Jack Chandre the Chinaman haha. You really must be gay to watch this'
>grabs 3 slices from my pizza and 2 chicken wings and eats them

Fuck I hope he doesn't try and watch tonight. I'm too hyped for it to be ruined by him

>>81187854

Orton/Wyatt HAS been that ludicrous

>burning down a shack
>bathing in ashes
>stabbing a grave with a crucifix
>demonic possession

These are all things that have actually happened as part of the story.

>>81187961

Yeah, that's Orton.

>>81187854
>>81187917

The only one of those stories that's embellished beyond what we've been told is the Reigns/Taker match.

He's actually pretty spot on with the majority.

Is that ugly bong slut that got caught getting spitroasted by two dudes and letting them jizz on her shitty gay wrestling belt gonna be there?

>>81188782
Hey she's not ugly faggot.

>>81188095
lel your life is fucking shit

stream where

>>81188095
That match was the shit. Your dad is a closeted faggot.

so whats the most hyped match?

>>81189038
The gay greased up guy in panties vs. the other gay greased up guy in panties.

>>81189038
Undertaker vs. Roman because it is likely Taker's last match

>>81188782

No.

>>81189038

By WWE:
>Roman Reigns vs The Undertaker
>Goldberg (c) vs Brock Lesnar for the WWE Ugly Red Belt

By fans:
>Bray Wyatt (c) vs Randy Orton for the WWE Championship
>Seth Rollins vs Triple H
>Chris Jericho vs Kevin Owens

>>81185945
>Watches wrestling
>Says he's not a fat autistic mong

lelokay

>>>/asp/

>>81189038
best tv build is miz/cena or owens/jericho

most interesting on paper is taker/reigns

>>81189106
SEETHING

>>81189038

For normie marks, Goldberg vs. Lesnar, Reigns vs. Taker
For virgin smarks, Jericho vs. Owens, Aries vs. Neville
For both, Wyatt vs. Orton, HHH vs. Rollins, Styles vs. McMahon

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>>81189122
>ABOUT TO BE 404'D

Stay on your containment board, fat manchild.

Lucha Underground on Netflix™ is wrestlekino and also /tv/.

>>81189127
>Styles vs. McMahon

>Boring 1v1 with no pops
>just watching AJ grab Shane by the pussy for 16 minutes

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

>>81189278

Everyone loves AJ and everyone loves Shane spots. The matchup itself is kinda ehh but guaranteed there will be something in the match people will enjoy.

>>81189278
They should do a twist and make it a street fight at the last moment. A Mania needs a twist.

>>81189278

Rumours are that there's gonna be a twist.

In the contract signing, Shane repeatedly asked AJ if he was actually going to read the contract.

The speculation is either that the match is No Disqualification OR that the match is actually AJ Styles vs A representative of Shane McMahon

is it tonight?

>>81189092
>GOLDBEERG VS BROCK
I dont watch wrestling anymore but when I did these two guys fought at mania with Austin as ref. The match sucked because Botchberg can't wrestle.

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>>81189566
>Actually you're going to fight... this man!
>VIOLENT VIOLIN STARTS PLAYING
Would be cool, but probably won't happen

>>81189589

Tonight is the night

>>81189691

The good news is that this time round, they're both older, goldberg still can't wrestle AND there's no potential Austin banter.

I confuse good and bad a lot.

>>81189702
if they do this it wwould be the best part of the whole show, god damn

>>81189702
I don't get the appeal of le wacky oriental man

>>81186175
predetermined means its fake you dumbass

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>>81191032
>boxer is paid to take a dive in the 7th round
>somehow all punches are now deemed fake

great logic, maybe go back to your capeshit

Says a lot about current WWE when the best moment of WM last year was HBK, Foley and Austin coming out for a 5 minute skit

>>81185851
Yeah bro, tell that fag, real men like us watch it for all the big sweaty men pretending to fight in their tight little shorts, god these fags make me sick, they can never know the joy of watching those dripping muscles clash in manly fake combat, their mighty chests heaving with barely restrained lust brah, totally sick brah.

>>81186726
Oh wow, you aced that test that means if you pass it you get the chance to give Mensa money? Oh tell us your wise insights o ascended one.

>>81191511
The best moment was Zack Ryder winning the IC title though.

Why did Paige make so many amateur porn films?

>>81184773
Normally I wouldn't understand why this is on /tv/, but I'm going to the theater to watch this on the big screen tonight so I get it

>>81191858
did you write this from inside the locker you were stuffed into?

>>81192212
but smarks are the losers, the people that want entertaining stories are the normalfags actually which is why viewership is currently in the toilet
smarks killed wrestling as bad as the PG era did

who /BigDog/ here?

>>81192430
BASED BIG DOG IS GONNA RETIRE TAKER

just looked at the card

GOLDBERG IS BACK?

AND WWE CHAMPION?!

WHAT THE FUCK LADS

>>81192497
WWE failed to build new stars so they brought back a nostalgia act.

>>81192212
Yeah bro, tell that fag, fucking puny queer, I bet he enjoys it when you fuck him in the ass that faggot, lets go watch the greased up muscle men touch each other so tenderly now bro, totally awesome!

>>81184773
thought this was a justice league promo at first desu

>>81189228
>Still not 404'd

Welp looks like you need to wipe that egg off your face.

>>81192430
bbdwts
>>81192121
wrestling lifestyle really

Anyone know a good place that will be streaming it?

>>81193331
WWE is giving it away for free if you're a new member.

>>81187714
Paraphrasing here but I believe Vince McMahon once said, "if you are a wrestling fan no explanation is necessary. If you are not a wrestling fan no explanation will do."

>>81185557
t. too young to see wcw

>>81188493
>bray wyatt
>fedora wearing jobber who literally hasnt won anything
lmao who still watches this garbage, the stories are boring and non-existent and they ruin all the characters they have with shitty booking

>>81191032
Predetermined means rigged, not fake.

Go back to /trash/

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who /ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOODE/ here?
the coolest motherfucker in the company by far.

>>81194452

i /glorious/ here

>>81194452
>le nearly 40-year old man in developmental as champion

there's no reason for this

>b-but nxt isn't developmental

the fuck it isn't, there's not a single person in nxt who isn't looking forward to their callup

>a-actually some of them want to stay because the booking is better there

wrestling is a job and nxt hasn't had a good story since 2014

>>81194953
Who are you quoting?

>>81195046
the first quote is a premise that I'm responding to, the next two are predicted responses to me

but you already knew that ;^)

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>>81195133
>predicted responses

>>81192739
what's the wifi like in the locker you are currently stuffed into?

>>81195133
>literally arguing with yourself
Pathetic

where can a poorfag watch this live?

>>81193952
t.reddit. he was always a shitty wrestler he was so bad he almost killed Bret hart

>>81196568

You can start a free 1 month trial on wwe network. That's what I've done

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I watched Wrestlemania last year and I haven't watched a single second of WWE since. I don't have to be up early tomorrow so I might watch tonight.

My only question is: what have I missed.

>>81197092
Not in leafland unfortunately, going to have to torrent.

>>81196568
http://taima.tv/r/wooo

stream link pls

>>81197332
they split the brands again, everything else will be explained in video packages better than the actual show ever would

>>81197332
Barely watched myself, but here's some key bits

>new brand split, new "world" title called the Universal Championship
>Goldberg came back, beat Lesnar in 90 seconds, also beat Kevin Owens in 20 seconds
>"The Future of TNA" AJ Styles won the WWE Title
>Finn Balor debuted on the main roster, was pushed to the moon, immediately got injured

So when does this start?

>>81197811
The pre-show is on now but you missed the two pre-show matches so it's just filler right now. The actual show starts in 30 minutes.

Who's got that stream lads

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WWE belongs on /tv/

>>81197924
can I watch the preshow for free?

anyone got a stream link?

YOU THINK YOU KNOW ME..

Wait, I'm watching it now.

I thought WWE events start at 1am UK time.

What there are german announcers now? I'm so confused. How long is this going to last. 2.5 hours?

>>81199235
This

>>81199380
3+

Is anyone watching?
Is this the official discussion thread?
Or this is a wrong board?

Shane still GOAT

>>81184773
based Aquaman front and center

>>81184773
Asian girl from NXT will interfere.

>>81184773

ITS NOT REAL WRASLING!