Stop being fat.

>>81073498
They should do an episode where he takes a day off and talks to the camera about what life has taught him

>>81073729

I agree. He's seen some shit

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"Just a taste, james," you say as he continues slurping down his gravy. "We both need our breakfast, correct?" Faintly nodding his approval, you get eye level with the yellowed crust flake on his toe. "An appetizer," you say. James eyes light up and he inquires, "where?" Ignoring him, you slide the tip of your tongue up the edge of the flake - a small piece breaks off and becomes soggy. Swallowing it, you tilt your head to the left and align your bottom teeth under the crust, moving slightly forward and shaving off the whole piece. "Mm," James grunts as the flake slides into your mouth, the oniony piece turning spongy. You swallow, but with an audible gulp - as large as it is, it didn't go down easy. "Now for the main course," you say wryly. James' beady eyes dart all over the room past his plate of gravy, looking for a fuller meal. Holding your nose up to the fold of his legs you take a deep smell all the way into your core. Cheese, mayonnaise and the smell of full rot enter your lungs. You gag, but you will not be denied your feast. Taking one of the leg pustules into your mouth, you bite down hard - thick, yellow pus shoots into your throat and strikes your uvula. With the taste of pure rot, your gag helps the half mouthful of disease get down your throat and into your stomach. This feels wonderful, as you haven't eaten in a full day. Finally you pull apart the crux of his legs to reveal half an inch of incredibly thick paste lining the folds. "Laygs" was yelped from the corpulent James, but you barely notice. Sliding a finger across the goop, you happily place your now heavier finger into your mouth and suckle the sour paste down. No longer can you help it and you go hog wild, drinking mouthfuls of what used to be skin and fat down your hungry throat. Stomach full and picking your teeth of bits of stringy flesh, you kiss James deeply through the remnants of sausage and gravy lining his lips. Falling asleep on his huge fatpad, stomach full, well, today was bliss.

>>81073498
I'VE SEEN CRAZY SHIT
SEEN CRAZY SHIT
I'VE SEEN FOOTAGE I STAY NOIDED

>>81073729
I wonder what he does for fun

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Steven, I'm Dr. Now.

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>>81073498

anyone else read this in his voice?

>>81074109
Seriously looks like something out of a body horror film

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MUH LEG

>>81074613
>that guy blinking in disgust

HOLY SHIT LMAO

>>81073498
In USA an obese man tells people to stop being fat

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*blocks your path*

>>81074613
KILL IT WITH FIRE

>>81074109
It's afraid? IT'S AFRAID!

>>81074613
i bet his house smells like the innards of a kfc restaurant

>>81074613
Does it burn? Idk why but something tells me it'd burn

>>81073498
I'm trying, doctor. I'm fucking trying for real this time, thanks in big part to these fucking threads.

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>>81076083

>>81074613
I want to scrape it off with some form of sharp object.

>>81076245

BASED

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>>81073498

>>81074138
>How y'all doing im dr now
>He wasn't full.
>uh you dont get to bring eggrolls
>It's only one lil'

>>81076858
She's clearly faking it for attention.

>>81076858
Does this count as exercise? I love the part where she manages to sit up for a few seconds and has to watch the wave coming to knock her over.

>>81076858
who the fuck brings their phone on the beach?

>>81076930
Why wouldn't you bring it?

>>81076858
She may be fat but it's clearly a dangerous beach with a drop off.

>>81074613
kill

>>81076955
niggers would steal it the second you left to go in the water

>>81077008
>going into the water
Anon, I...

>>81076930
Everyone?

When was the last time you even left your house you fucking loser?

>>81077033
hey i'm in flyover land, if i'm going all the way to the beach i'm sure as hell going in the water

>>81076858

How does man haev such great thicc white ass in face and not plunge tongue into sandy ashoel?

>>81077049
no they don't, chimp

>>81077083
Yeah, they fucking do you goddamn loser. Source: the beach is 100 yards out my fucking window.

Go back to /reddit9k/ shut in.

>>81077098
most people don't, kid

>>81076245
I actually had someone say something similar to me and it was my wake up call that I needed to lose weight

>>81076930

Literally every single person who has a phone.

>>81077154
nope try again

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>>81077126
Yes they do, flyover cow. Picture related from not that long ago.

Lose weight and stop talking about shit you don't know about.

>>81076930
To capture kino like this

>>81077213
>grabs a google image
>HAHA SEE
feeling insecure, sweet tits?

>>81077126
>>81077203

>People don't have phones at the beach in the movies I watch in mom's basement so people don't bring phones to the beach

kek go check instagram or maybe actually go to the beach and stay wrong brah

>>81077249
wew that autistic spazzout won't make you less wrong

>>81077246
>Google image

lel faggot that's directly from my fucking phone, I dare you to find it on reverse image search. Nice try at moving the goalposts though you fat ugly flyover cow.

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>>81077264

>Get proof you're wrong
>Stick your fingers in your ears and do the internet equivalent of "LA LA LA I'M NOT LISTENING I'M RIGHT LA LA LA!"

But yeah we're the autistic ones.

>>81077273
haha are you literally shaking right now?

>>81076969
yeah. An old (but not fat) person wouldn't fare much better there.

>>81077264
http://www.marieclaire.com/culture/a9975/how-to-summer-proof-cell-phone/

Now fuck off.

>>81077302
>proof
haha
bringing your phone to the beach is already autistic

>>81077303
This is just embarrassing for you right now. Why don't you post your I was just acting retarded joke's on you image and close the thread already flyover cow.

>>81076955
Because you can very easily get sand or water in it and ruin it? I bring mine but I use it through a ziplock bag

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At least James was content with killing himself without being a complete piece of shit to everyone around him.

Steven is next level scumbag.

>>81077340
i leave it in the car or room like a normal person, sweetie

>>81077343
Get yourself a thin mesh bag it keeps the sand out and you can use it like normal they sell them right on the beach. Plus how old is your phone that it's not waterproof?

>>81077390
Flyover cow who goes to the beach once a decade please stop posting. Thanks for your tourist shekels and being a constant source of amusement to us that live there when your fat ass takes off your shirt though.

>>81077422
>*literally shaking*

>>81077390

Only fat tourists go to the beach to swim. Stay home and lose weight.

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>>81077438
I bet you are, fatass.

Sorry, let me put it in your language so you can understand it better: "MOO MOOO MOO MOOOMOO MOO".

>>81077442
t. can't swim

>>81077394
My phone's a G3 from 2014. And no phone is waterproof; they just have different degrees of water resistance.

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>>81077470
UPGRADE YOUR PHONE

>>81077460
>*trembling fingers slipping for the correct letters in rage*

https://youtu.be/a9_vljpwZyo

This song came out in .February 2016

If an episode takes a year to film, that must mean that he made this video while he was living in Houston

>>81077469

t. retard

Why would I swim in the ocean with you fatasses when I have a perfectly fine pool in the rear of my house? Only tourists and surf rats swim in the ocean like I said. You go to the ocean to sit in the sand and get a tan and shitpost on your phone.

>>81077535
someone has to feed the sharks

>>81077538

lol

>>81077501
Why should I? I take care of it and it still works fine and is undamaged

>>81077509
Be honest fatty, how red with rage and sweat are you right now? You should be thanking me I bet you've lost 10-15 calories from me making you upset with facts alone.

>>81077535
>going to the beach to shitpost because you can't swim

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>>81077548
>lol

>>/leddit/

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>>81077552
UPGRADE IT

>>81077422
I bet you're the guy who looks like a mexican but never takes his shirt off so everything above your elbow looks like mayonaise. You wearing your shirt on the beach is more distracting than if you'd just take it off, lardass.

>>81077561
i'm cool as a cucumber right now
i can tell you're extremely worked up over being made fun of for bringing your phone to the beach, though
literally cannot stop replying to me :^)

>>81077585
make me

Last night was PURE kino.

I fell asleep halfway through what happened to Steven and JUSTin?

>>81077575
>Anime lardass

kek gee what a surprise

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>shit posting about phones at the beach
>some fucker is getting triggered about it

what the actual fuck is happening here

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>>81077605
I'm not fat

>>81077613
Autism

>>81077561
my armfat is swinging around while i smash my keyboard

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>>81077598
YOU WILL UPGRADE IT

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>>81077596
>tfw just had to smash a fuckhuge spider that crawled down my wall and now I actually am triggered

I am sorry let me move in with you pls flyover friend I am throwing my phone in the ocean as we speak.

> TFW reading this while eating some leftover KFC, potatos, gravy, and mac n cheese using my fupa as a table and listening to foot fetish porn in the background.

>>81077736
>listening to foot fetish porn

But why?

>>81077721

Aussie shitposter spider necromancy you shouldn't have angered them now they're coming for you.

>>81076858
hahahaha what the fuck

>tfw frying all my food but keep gaining weight

Wtf am I doing wrong bros?

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>>81078144
You're supposed to bake the calories out of your food.

>>81078144
gotta fry it some more. double fry it. cook all them calories out of it,

can someone recommend a kino episode besides james?

i dont have enough time to watch them all

>>81073498
>stop eating non-proteins

>>81078170
Amber, made me cry desu

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>>81078162
Eventually the batter will suffocate all the calories

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>>81073498
no

>>81076858
imagine how funny this would be if the guy had a boner

They should just handcuff these people to a fucking radiator with a gallon of water and a bag of rice

>>81073498
Well when you put it like that.

>>81073498
any link to last nights episode?

>>81079446

The fucker is bedridden. It's not like he can even get up to find food if he wanted to. Just stop fucking feeding him anything.

>>81074137
browse /tv/

>>81077640
No, he's schizophrenic.

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>>81074613

>>81077613
>shitposting

Are you the retard who thinks people don't bring phones to the beach?

Let me guess, you were "just pretending" to be retarded?

Anybody got a link to the torrent? not on IP.

>>81080861
no links on any streaming sites yet