>A child, the size of a tangerine

>>80982821
hey but your thumbnail says "Peach time" lol

>>80982842
Sarcasm, the size of a tangerine

TANGERINE
NICE AND BIG

An orangutan, the size of a chimpanzee.

when I finish my Airplane 2! movie script based entirely on /tv/ greentext, it's going to have a guy say ">In English, Doc" which will be followed by Michael Caine spewing nonsense gibberish in the thickest english accent imaginable.

WHEN AY WUS EN BUHMA

AFLONG AFLONGKONG

>>80983937
just looked that up

i can't stop laughing

>>80983839
Kino desu

>>80983879
I ATE A TANGERINE THE SIZE OF A CHILD

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>A blockbuster, the size of a rotten tomato

SAM MEHN JUST WONT TO WAUCH THE WHORLD BURNH

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>>80984800

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I failed yeh mastuh wayne

A ruby, the size of a tangerine-sized ruby

A man, the size of a ruby

Was this the predecessor to baneposting?

>>80985226
that would be a really small guy

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>We burned the whole fucking forest down kid and all to destroy that tangerine.

Wow dark knight got edgy

>>80985402
For England, James

SHE WAS ONLY SIXTEEN YEARS OLD

>>80983839
Airplane 2 already exists

Why did he burn all those tangerines?

>>80986081
shum peeple arnt loookin fur anything juishy, loik a tangerine. They cahnt be fed, memed, or childed. Some men just want to baynepohst.

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...Tangerine.

>>80983879
TANGERINE

>>80985843
That's probably why his movie is called Airplane 2!

>>80986312
Doke-tah Pahvel, Ah'm TANGERINE

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A plane, the size of me, my men, but only one of you.

Haha guys are we witnessing the birth of an epic new meme?

>>80986923
>me
>my men
>but only one
>TANGERINE

>>80984800
KEK

>>80985843
He'll need to call his Airplane Too!

>>80986963
First one to ripen gets to stay on my juicing machine!

>>80985517

lmao
based rendezvousposting

Perhaps he's wondering why you would skin a tangerine before putting it in a juicer

When I was in Burma I saw a child eating a ruby on the side of the road, the size of a tangerine sized ruby in Burma.

>WITH ALL RESPECT, MASTER TANGERINE.

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But their tangerines were being raided in a tangerine north of Rangoon by a tangerine. So, we went looking for the tangerine. But in six tangerine, we never met anybody who traded with tangerines. One day, I saw a tangerine playing with a tangerine the size of a tangerine. The tangerine had been throwing tangerines away.

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>>80987967
>a tangerine playing with a tangerine the size of a tangerine. The tangerine had been throwing tangerines away.

someone explain this maymay

>>80988184
tangerine

>>80983879
OH GOOOOOOD FOR YOU
AND HOW WAS IT?

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>>80987967
>One day, I saw a tangerine playing with a tangerine the size of a tangerine.

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>>80987441
my sides are the size of a tangerine

>>80988370
>They told me i could be anything, so i became a tangerine

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IF YOU CAN TEWL ME DUH RUSHAN FOH APPLY YA OWN BLOODY TANGUREEN

WHEN I WAS A TANGERINE
RUNNING THROUGH THE NIGHT
AFRAID OF WHAT MIGHT BE
HIDING IN THE DARK
HIDING IN THE STREET

TO TO TO TO TO TO

THE TANGERINES OF LOVE ARE ON ME

TO TO TOT OT TO TO TO

IVE ALWAYS BEEN THIS CAVALIER

A LONG TOYME AGO, AH WAS IN BUHMA. MY FRIENDS AND I WERE WERKIN', FO DA LOCAL GUB'MENT. DE GUB MENT WAS DE SOIZE OFFA TANGERINE.

WE BURNT DA FOWEST DOWN

I HAVE DIS, FANTASY. I SIT DOWN, HAVE ME SOME BRANDY, AND I'D SEE YOU WITH SOME FLOOZY ACROSS THE BAH

>>80988703
... a floozy the size of a tangerine

AND YOU'RE SITTIN GTHERE, EATING A TANGERINE. MAYBE WITH A COUPLE OF TANGERINE OF YOUR OWN. AND YOU LOOK AHT ME, AHND WEE DONT EXCHANGE WAHRDS, BUT WEE BOTH KNOW THAT YOU MADE IT.

>>80986493
I SAW A CHILD PLAYING, WITH A TANGERINE. DU BANDIT, HAD BEEN THROWIN EM AWAY.

"S-"

WELL BECAUSE HE THOUGHT IT WAS GOOD SPORT.

Baneposting>Tangerineposting>Justposting>Hahahahaposting

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>Did you ever hear the tragedy of Tangerine the Tangerine? I thought not. It’s not a story the Justice League would tell you. It’s a DC legend. Darth Tangerine was a Dark Tangerine of the League of Tangerine Shadows, so powerful and so wise he could use the tangerines to influence the child to create rubies… He had such a knowledge of tangerines that he could even keep the ones he cared about from getting scurvy. The dark side of the Tangerine is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be the size of a child. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his tangerines, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his tangerine everything he knew, then his tangerine killed him in his sleep. Tangironic. He could save others from tangerines, but not a tangerine.

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>Massa Wayne, if you ever get stuck in a forest because a thief stole your tangerines, you must keep your composure, try to bend the mechanics, start a fire for example, burn down the forest

>>80988932
>>80988665
>WE BURNT DA FOWEST DOWN
Why isn't there a movie about how monstrous Alfred and his cronies were for burning down a forest for one man?

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>>80988955
I don't get how burning the forest down got them to catch the bandit. Did they have so many men that they could station them all around the forest and wait for the bandit to come out? how did they even know that the bandit was inside the forest? did they check that there weren't other people there that they accidentally burned down?

DA LAMBORGEEENY DEN. MUCH MORE SUTTLE

>>80989030
ET WAS SUTTLE. YU WOULDN'T UNDASTAND, MAHSTA WAYNE

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>>80989066
What was even his point? Was he advising Bruce to burn down Gotham? Some men just want to see the world burn, indeed.

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10/10 I heard that in his voice.

>>80988891
God I hate when a shitpost makes me laugh.

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Oh fuck im dying

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>>80988891
>Tangironic

>>80985794
AND WHEN HE GETS LOUDLY, HE GETS VERY LOUD INDEED

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>>80988891
>Tangironic
lmao

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6SuTLMp6Ytw

>inb4 The Tangerine Knight - that came first, but this one's better.

>>80989990
The Tangerine Knight is superior because it has the narrative that Alfred is keeping Bruce from doing anything, as seen here: >>80988829

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>>80989990
>working for the local tangerine

>>80989990
nah fuck your inb4 this ones always been better https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZS6bD3SpIvk

>>80985517
For Burma, Master Wayne

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>>80983879
toplel

>>80989030

They were brits in some kinda post-colonial country, right? Sure as fuck they burn the forest down, can't catch a criminal without crushing a few tangerines!

>Remember when you left Gotham? Before all this, before Batman? You were gone seven years. Seven years I waited, hoping that you wouldn't come back. Every year, I took a holiday. I went to Florence, there's this cafe, on the banks of the Arno. Every fine evening, I'd sit there and order a Fernet Branca. I had this fantasy, that I would look across the tables and I'd see you there, with a wife and maybe a couple of tangerines. You wouldn't say anything to me, nor me to you. But we'd both know that you'd made it, that you were happy. I never wanted you to come back to Gotham. I always knew there was nothing here for you, except pain and tragedy. And I wanted something more for you than that. I still do.

>>80989030
>Did they have so many men that they could station them all around the forest and wait for the bandit to come out?
they were trying to kill the bandit. Have you ever seen the uncontralable hell that a forest fire is? its impossible to escape if you'r caught in the middle of it.
>how did they even know that the bandit was inside the forest?
same reason drug farming and cooking takes place deep inside dense (usually) rain forests
>did they check that there weren't other people there that they accidentally burned down?
people don't live in forests. maybe one or two indigenous groups per 1000km but idk about africa

>>80990452
>people don't live in forests.

I didn't say they do, but there might have been a few children berrypicking or hacking wood or whatever. It's not like only one person can be inside a forest at a time. And while the thief may be hiding in forests, it doesn't have to be THIS forest. That entire story is fucking retarded, but it actually fits the nature of colonial Brits I guess.

i wont bury anuva membah ov da wayne famaleigh...

...the size...

*breaks down in tears*

*clenches fist to mouth*

... ov a bloody tangerine...

wasnt it during Burmese civil war? a lot of guerrilla warfare. rebels hid out in the forests like the vietcong did in nam

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>>80990452
o shit for some reason I always thought this country was in africa. But yeah they have dense tropical forests and those are dangerous af so I doubt anyone lives in them
>>80990612
nigga those kinds of forests have snakes that can crush and eat a 200lb man like its nothing and small animals like frogs and spiders with venom to kill an elephant in 2 minutes. People don't go into them just like that, maybe in the outskirts but like I said, if you want to hide you have to go deep. This is not comfy pine forests like in america. The only people that live in them are very (very) rare small indigenous groups and I don't even know if they have them in burma

>>80990612
>>80990840

>>80990845
>people don't go into them
>but thieves do

Make up your mind retard.

>>80990899
haha u got me :^)

>>80990437
Suttle!

>>80985843
It's a soft reboot.

>>80986513
2! = 2

or is that the joke

durin deh wahr me an me men wa stack in de bloody forest ou der in burhma
awl we ad to eat wer dees fackin biscuits made ye sick as a pawwot mr bruhce
won tiem a was so chonstipated i shat ow a turd was da soize of o tangerine an me mate archie the kant took a pigture of me arrishole corrr dey was some goad ol memowees
heah ehaheah da soize of a fackin tangerine

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>>80988891
>Is it possible to learn this power?

>>80985794
>>80989834

YOU WERE ONLAH SUPPOSHED TO BLOW THE BLOODAH DOORS OFF

>>80991222
>not from a tangerine

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>>80983937
my sides

>>80991175

>>80983937
>>80984294

remarkably unfunny. especially considering the tangerine knight is next in queue and is tippity top tier

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>>80991175

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S4mY4FHyT80

AV BURRY ANOFF MEMBAS UV DAH WAIN FEMMILY

What the fuck is wrong with this place?

What the fuck did i just find
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZS6bD3SpIvk

>>80991641
a tangerine

>>80991598
wot da fack is wong wiv dis pwace, master wayne?

>>80982821

SHE WAS ONLY 15 YEARS OLD

>>80983839
C-can we collab anon?
Seriously though am interested in that

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>>80991598

>your badge and your tangerine

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>>80985137
Hilarious

>>80984800
Underrated post

>>80987441
>>80987967
>>80988891
Jesus christ

>ruby
>tangerine

who wins?

>"Remember when you left Gotham? Before all this, before tangerines? You were gone seven years. Seven years I waited, hoping that you wouldn't come back. Every year, I took a holiday. I went to Florence, there's this tangerine, on the banks of the Arno. Every fine evening, I'd sit there and order a tangerine. I had this fantasy, that I would look across the tables and I'd see you there, with a wife and maybe a couple of tangerines. You wouldn't say anything to me, nor me to you. But we'd both know that you'd made it, that you were tangerine. I never wanted you to come back to Gotham. I always knew there was no tangerines here for you, except pain and tragedy. And I wanted tangerines for you. I still do."

ONE DAY I SAW AH TANGERINE PLAYING WITH A CHILD THE SIZE OF A TANGERINE

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>>80988891
>Even Master Wayne doesn't have a tangerine count that high!

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>>80992115

>and your *other* tangerine

>>80991175
KEK

>WE HAD TO BEAT HIM TO DEATH WITH HIS OWN SHOES

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>>80992115
>furiously mashes tangerines with hands
>"I'm in"

You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become a tangerine

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFIQIpC5_wY
SHE WAS ONLY SIXTEEN YEARS OLD

>>80992572
>peel the tangerine!
>they're both tangerines!

>>80984800
checked and keked

WHERE IS THE TANGERINE!!!!

>>80992412
IN ENGLISH DOC

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>I was in Burma
>
>the tangerine

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>>80988891
>Tangironic

>>80988311
KEK

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>>80988891
>Tangironic

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Guys I don't have twitter somebody please ask Michael if he likes tangerines:

https://twitter.com/themichaelcaine

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6SuTLMp6Ytw

>>80988311
The size of a tanjarene

>>80986923
You're the size of a tangerine

For you

>>80993803
>

>>80993803
>died before he could tell her that her dad didnt know about the tangerine

>>80993803
Can't even joke about what he was saying there because I didn't understand a word of it

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>>80982821
>ONCE, I SAW A CHILD THE SIZE OF BURMA PLAYING WITH A TANGERINE THE SIZE OF A RUBY CHILD. I WAS A TANGERINE, MASTER BRUCE. THAT IS WHY WE FALL. TO LEARN TO PICK OUR TANGERINES, RUBY-SIZED TANGERINES, UP AGAIN.

These tangerine memes will never get old.

>MAHsta wayen, did eyeh evaj tehw yew abowt tangerines? I fought iz dad awn a tangerine clawning faciwity. Ee wuz a good tangerine frweind.

>>80988703
>tfw niggas never had a fernie brancah

>>80983937
WUTSWONGWIHONKON

>>80983937
I don't even get it and I'm laughing

WE BURNED THE RUBIES TO THE GROUND

>>80988891
>Tangironic
Stuff like this is why I come to /tv/

>I woen dew it mastah wayne I will nawt barry another tangerine

>>80989439
does shitposting mean contributing with something funny or do you just spout words you've heard to fit in

>I fingered a man in eh buhma, he had prostate the of a bloody tangerine

>>80989321
his point was Bruce was trying to figure out Joker's "motives" and the Joker is just a shitposter

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>And old Danny fell. Round and round and round and round, like a tangerine.

>>80986945
fuck you newfag

Dr. Pavel. I'm Tangerine.

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>You think tangerine is your ally? You merely adopted the tangerine. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the ruby till I was the size of a tangerine and by then it was Buhma.

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>>80988184

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>>80988891
>Tangironic

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So, me watching, he takes the tangerine to her, laughing while he does it. ... He comes at me with the tangerine. "Why so serious?!" He sticks the tangerine in my mouth—"Let's put a tangerine on that face!"

>>80988891
someone please save this

>>80988891
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0jVgkjscsvw

I tried

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Hold on a minute lads, I've got a great tangerine

>>80998302
Hi, Michael.

>>80982821
Ret me tall u sumfin missa Wayne, JawJawBreenks wuz duh bess charactuh in duh whole bluh-ee series mate, u fink dat Yedi fella had the bravery o' dat Gungan, me no finks so

>>80991222
>>80991294
My heckin sides

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>>80998481
>Heckin'

>>80998537
A swear word the size of a t*ng*r*n*

>>80991175
I almost felll of of my bed

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>>80991175

>shum mehin ahnt luwken fowh innehtheen luwjickol
>shum mehin ghousht whaun uh tauhnjuwhrene

>>80984800
Heartily keked.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=930-WGuRJu0

This thread.

Some men aren't looking for anything logical. Some men just want a tangerine.

>>80998804
This looks Welsh crossed with Dutch.

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>>80986312
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0z9bBFSW88t

>>80998302
9/10

a wooby

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>>81000604

>>80983937
oh my god im dying here

its so stupid too

Tell me about Caine

>>80988891
The dark side of the Tangerine is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be.....acidic

>>80991175
i spit all over my new laptop

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>>80982821
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0KQCweZXAHv

>>80988891
i understood that referance

>>80991817
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFIQIpC5_wY

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>>80987967

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A long time ago, I was in Siam. My friends and I were working for the local government. They were trying to buy the loyalty of tribal leaders by bribing them with precious stones. But their caravans were being raided in a forest north of Bangkok by a bandit. So, we went looking for the stones. But in six months, we never met anybody who traded with him. One day, I saw a child playing with an emerald the size of a grapefruit. The bandit had been throwing them away.

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>>80988891

Lotta loyalty for a hired tangerine

>>80988589
lold

https://youtu.be/ZS6bD3SpIvk

>>80991067
>soft rebooting just the sequel
That's genius!

>>80984800
>>80984800
>>A blockbuster, the size of a kíno
You had one job, no wonder you have so little (you)s rëddit.

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>the tangerine was this big, man

>>81002412
Literally DUDE WEED LMAO the character

>>81000291
I don't see any welsh.

>>80992599
Underrated

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>>80988891
>Tangironic
>mfw
>>80991222
fuckin checked
>>80991294
fuckin keked

Who do you think gets a laugh out of these threads?

My guess is 17 year old britbong highschoolers on a launch break

>>81002582
t. Neogafer

>>81002582
Hi, bandit.

>>81002683
>>81002630
(You)'s indicate I was right

thank you

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>>80982821
>I SAW A CHILD PLAYING WITH HIS FAMILY JEWELS, THEY WERE THE SIZE OF A TANGERINE

>>81002716
Hi, bandit.

>>81002582
These are the threads that make /tv/, /tv/. It reminds of a time before BLACKED and pedo posting. A good time. Anyway here's your (You).

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>"Hey can we get some tangerines in here?"

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A long time ago, I was in /tv/. My friends and I were working for the local janitor. He were trying to buy the loyalty of hired guns by bribing them with precious memes. But their threads were being raided in a forest north of /GOT/ by a hothead. So, we went looking for the memes. But in six months, we never met anybody who laughed at them. One day, I saw an autist playing with a meme the size of a big guy (for you). The autist had been throwing them away.

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>>81002854

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>>81002854
7/10

>>81002854
>The autist had been throwing them out of a plane.

>>80982821
Warsh fer dinger der ay yer wat mehs Weyne

ARRR DONCALMEWANEIMBATMANARRRRR

>>80989030
"Some men just want to watch the world burn" was referring to Alfred, not the bandit.

>That's a beautiful tangerine. Reminds me of the one that belonged to my mother. It can't be the one - her tangerines are in this safe...

>>80993803
>I lied.. there was no tangerine

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T A N G I R O N I C

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>>81002582
>You're probably an expert on tangerines, right? Probably know all the genuses, species, what climates they grow in. Maybe you even bought a tangerine at a store once. But you've never been to an orchard. You've never plucked a tangerine straight from a tree and bit into it until you could feel the juices run down your face. You've never drilled a hole into a tangerine, microwaved it and then fucked the hole. You're just a kid.

>>81001577
Another privileged lowercase poster whose parents buy him laptops all the time because he keeps getting mad and destroying them.

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I HAVE A TANGERINE!

WHEN OI VOZ IN BOHMAH, OI SAW AY BENDIT THE SOIZE OF A RUHBY THROWING AWAY TANGERINES

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>>81002582
t.edgelord

wun day, ah sawr a choild playin wif a rubay the soize of a tangerayne. da bandit had bin frowin dem away

a' slight'ly more chinese tangerine, i hopes.

>>81002582
>launch break

Houston, we have a fag.

>>81002582
>in england students are allotted 30 minute intervals in which tangerines are launched across smouldering forests in an attempt to thwart bandits
>it's called a "launch break"

WHEN I WUS EN GOFFAM, tangerine.

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>>81003446

>I've been working for the government in Burma for FIFTEEN YEARS
>What's your name?
>TANGERINE that' my name

>>81001734
Wow, fucking took long enough for this to get posted.

I came into the thread to post it but had to check if someone had already done it.

So, why exactly was le tangerine man in Burma? Was he a superhero before deciding to retire and become a butler for the Tangerine family?

>>81001734
haha, that's awesome.

>>81003446
MFW I read that in Robin Williams voice.

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>>80988891
>He had such a knowledge of tangerines that he could even keep the ones he cared about from getting scurvy

Fucking kek

>>80991175
...SHAT ON A TURTLE!

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>>80988891
>Tangironic

>>81004260
>>80992685

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So there I am, in Burma, at about 3 o'clock in the morning, looking for one dozen tangerines to fill a brandy glass, or Ozzy wouldn't go on stage that night. So, my Jeff Beck pops his head 'round the door, and mentions there's a little tangerine shop on the edge of town. So - we go. And - it's closed. So there's me, and Keith Moon, and David Crosby, breaking into that little sweets shop, eh. Well, instead of a guard dog, they've got this bloody great big ruby the size of a tangerine. I managed to take out the ruby with a can of preserves, but the shopowner and his son... that's a different story altogether. I had to beat them to death with their own tangerines. Nasty business, really. But, sure enough, I got the tangerines, and Ozzy went on stage and did a great show.

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>Well hello beautiful. And you ARE beautiful.

YOU AND ME? WE'RE FUCKING DONE.

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>>81005749
>Gets in deep and gambles with tangerines

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>>80988891

Tangerine? More like, heh, TANGER the size of a child

God-tier thread

>And den, mum trew me lad mags, in da bin

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>>80988891
>Tangironic

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>>80989990

>>80991641
My sides have been massacred. How did this slip by?

http://vocaroo.com/i/s1agJmJkdOgt

>>81002582
35 years old... woke up laughing like a tangerine

>>81002854
>Why would we do that?

>>80983667
Heh.

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>you will never be a younger you again

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>>81003889
KEK

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>>80982821

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>TFW been trying to think of something funny for half a day and have nothing

>He doesn't even have a tangerine policy

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>>80988891

>>80983839
They already did that joke in Austin Powers, complete with Michael Caine

superior Fall On Your Sword video:

Shatner's climbing a mountain the size of a tangerine

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HU2ftCitvyQ

YOU WERE ONLY SUPPOSED TO BLOW THE TANGERINES OUT OF THE BLOODY THIRTEEN YERS OLD

>>80998302
>http://vocaroo.com/i/s0jVgkjscsvw
incredible

>>80998302
how can i record this masterpiece

>>80998302
>http://vocaroo.com/i/s0jVgkjscsvw

lmao

>>80982821
I fucking hate Christopher Nolan and every last one of his imbecilic pretentious fans.

>>81001610
>http://vocaroo.com/i/s0KQCweZXAHv

how did he get away with this?

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>you lived long enough to witness tangerine posting

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>>80988891

funniest thread on /tv/ in ages

>>81005709
Kek

>>81011113
tangerineposting is like at least 4 years old, you're just a newfriend

>>81011422
Please go back to le eddit, tangerineposting is brand new. Sorry faggot.

>>81011113
TANGERINE
is older than BANE

>>81011483
kys

>>81011491
>>81011522
wow you guys are new, go back to le eddit please k thanks.

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>>81002582
>Good evening, little shitposter! What can I do for you? If you're looking for guaranteed replies we've got some nice cozy faggot-sized threads available, always proud to cater to autistic folk, Mr...

>Hothead. The name's Hothead.

>>80998302
fucking kek

>>80998302
but you don't do the broken voice...when he get's very emotional, and when IT GETS LOUDLY, IT GET'S VERY LOUDLY INDEED.

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>>80988891
>. The dark side of the Tangerine is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be the size of a child

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Billy Nomates?

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>>81003446
I'm fucking crying
jesus crhist my lungs hurt so much

http://vocaroo.com/i/s0i6IvHAHqXv

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>>80998302
holy fuck

>>80988891
Brutal. Absolutely brutal.

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>>81002854

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>>80998302
Lol

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>>80998302
>this is considered funny on /tv/

WE MIDDLESCHOOLERS NOW

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>>81003446
underreplied post

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>>80998302

>which some considered to be... the size... of a child

>>80991175
Kekked and screencapped

>>80993803
do not go gently into that good tangerine

Bruuuce...Bruce..Did I ever tell you about tangerines? They were fruits the army used to fight scurvy in the jungles of Burma, until the day the resistance got a hold of them and poisoned them, leaving many of my men dead. They were good friends

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>>80988891
>Tangironic.

>>80982821
Did you catch him?

>>81003446
lol'd

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>>81003446

>>80998302
I thought you'd fuck it up. but you did the voice and pronunciation of "tangerine" perfectly.

>>81011876
Wear some fucking underwear, stupid slut.

WHERE IS AUSTIN POWERS 4? MICHAEL CAINE CAN'T LIVE FOREVER.

THE FUCKING DUTCH.

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>>81012994
never

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>>81011937
>tfw you actually are Billy Nomates

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>>81013125
LISTEN TO ME.

Somebody needs to go up and ask Caine to sign a tangerine.