What pagan mythology has the coolest stories to adapt to film?

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>>80730171
None.

>>80730171
Sumerian. Would actually be perfect, we would show their practices, but since we do not actually know why, we could not show why and it would just have this eerie air of mysticism.

>>80730211
kys.

>>80730171
most stories of mythlogy dont really make sense in a modern context desu, their motives and decisions can be pretty off kilter

half of greek/roman mythology were about rape and extramarital affairs, but in their stories its so normal and everyday

>>80730433
>half of greek/roman mythology were about rape and extramarital affairs
was the greekoromans gods niggers

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>>80730890
SO ITS TRUE

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>>80730171
in a less PC world I can totally see a zany, kooky western take on Journey to the West, its not a serious story anyway.

most people are familiar with the theme but dont know the actual tales

it wouldnt make a lot of money, but it'll be a fun thing to watch while drunk or stoned

>>80732099
>its not a serious story anyway.
Kek, how to tell someone hasn't read the books. It's an extremely serious novel which takes on comical themes.

>>80732099
Name me 1 character more powerful than the Monkey King.

>>80732143
ok i have not read the books, and I suppose it can be done in a serious fashion

but i dont think morality/eastern philosphical lessons will work well for a modern audience, and the source material is flexible

>>80732272
buddha who pwned his ass and imprisoned him for 500 years

>>80732434
It can be very depressing.

>>80730171
>the coolest stories to adapt
DUDE ATE HIS KIDS LMAO
DUDE TURNED INTO A FEMALE HORSE AND LET DADDY PLAY WITH HER COOTER LMAP
DUDE JEALOUS OF HIS BRO RIPS HIS HEART OUT AND HIDES IT FROM BRO LMAO

>>80732474
interesting, I might really find some time to read the books now

>>80732520
>DUDE TURNED INTO A FEMALE HORSE AND LET DADDY PLAY WITH HER COOTER LMAP

w-which episode was this?

>>80732649
The One Where The Gods Try To Jew The Mason.

Please no more fucking Grecians.

Why the hell hasn't Hollywood made a film about the Epic of Gilgamesh yet?

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>>80732099

Scene: Loki enters the mead hall, where the Gods are pelting Baldr with a bunch of random junk. Baldr stands there and takes it.

LOKI: ...What the Hel are you guys doing?

BRAGI: Oh, we're trying to kill Baldr!

LOKI: You're trying to do what!? What the fuck!?

BRAGI: Dude, relax, he's practically unkillable.

HODR: Yeah, his mom had a nightmare about Baldr dying, and she went round and made everything swear not to kill him. Like, everything, dude.

BRAGI: Seriously, yeah. Baldr's mom is kinda nuts.

BALDR: Hey, guys, can you stop throwing hard stuff at me? Just because it won't kill me doesn't mean it won't hurt - Hey! OW! What the hell? Are you using a -catapult-?

ODIN: Yeah, Weyland made it! This thing can throw -anything-. Boulders, barrels of pitch, other people, it's the best.

BALDR: It hurts!

ODIN: Oh, don't be such a baby, Baldr!

NANNA: Ahahaha! Little baby Baldr!~

LOKI: ....So, wait, wait - let me get this straight. Baldr's mom went round and asked EVERYTHING not to kill him?

BRAGI: Yeah, dude. Everything.

LOKI: Absolutely everything?

BRAGI: Well, yeah, dude, I mean...pretty much everything.

LOKI: Are you -sure- about that?

BRAGI:...


http://alexanderlozada.com/iasip/?IlRoZSBHYW5nIEtpbGxzIEJhbGRyIg==

>>80730171
Any of them besides Greek/Roman gods. Seriously, they've been done to fucking death.

Prostagma?

>>80734603
I really hate that marvel left out the part where Loki fathered Odin's horse.

>>80730171

Honestly? Old Testament, they get up to some cool shit.

I know nothing about Aztec mythology, but I assume it's pretty rad. I would also like a Norse setting that isn't americanized to hell and back.

>>80732746

More like "the one where it isn't actually Loki's fault for once"

>>80730171
>hinduism is pagan mythology

Nope, can't use it fool, theres a almost a billion adherents it won't go down well..plus its not mythology, if you don't call the bible mythology, you can't call this mythology..

>>80734854

Metales.

>>80735100
A lot of indigenous American mythology is epic as fuck.

>>80730171
I don't know.
I think there's so much to work within a lot of different pagan mythologies.

Personally I'd like to see more of indian mythology in movies, but I honestly would prefer to see it outside of indian cinema.
I watch some indian cinema and it's good action comedy romcom shlock, but a straight up semi serious hollywood action fantasy set in some hindu story would be neat.

>>80730171
doesn't matter, all religions are copies of eachother
Hardly any original stuff.

Only Norse/Egyptian/Indian

>>80735166
>Nope, can't use it fool, theres a almost a billion adherents it won't go down well..plus its not mythology,

I remember when kali or someone showed up in supernatural and I thought it seemed a bit offensive in how they treated the character, but reading online I couldn't find any offensive hindus.
one comment from an indian guy was that they tend to just be happy that their stuff is portrayed and included.

That may very well have changed though with another of indian americans having gone through college.

>>80730171
Probably Norse or Roman, but looking at these pictures I think Zeus would be the best

Zeus
>once transformed into goose to fuck one of his grand daughters

Odin
>eats the balls of the men he's slain

Kali
>batshit crazy

Chaac/Tlaloc
I dont have anything to green text, Mayan mythology is pretty shallow and it's mostly about killing or being a deity to some sort of element

Ra
>WE

Amateratsu
Okay this is actually the most interesting just due to her family being pretty cool. Her mother is Izanami and was thrown to hell by her husband. Her brother is a samurai who killed a 9 headed serpent by getting it drunk.

>>80735002

It's Always Sunny in Asgard

http://alexanderlozada.com/iasip/?Ikxva2kncyBTb24gaXMgYSBIb3JzZSI=

ODIN is showing off his new mount, Sleipnir, pointing out all the extra features to the gang. LOKI staggers into the mead hall, covered in straw, pale and sweaty, a delirious smile on his face.

LOKI: AHA!

THOR: ...Woah.

BRAGI: ...-Dude-.

NANNA: Loki, what the Hel happened to you?

LOKI: You thought you'd bested me! You all thought you'd bested me! But at last, I have had my VENGEANCE! I have been AVENGED!

NANNA: ...I have no idea what he's talking about. Do you guys have any idea of what he's talking about?

BRAGI: No.

THOR: Nuh-uh.

ODIN: Loki, calm down, you're drunk. You been hitting that serpent venom again?

LOKI: No, Gods damn it - I've been avenging myself! You guys always treat me like a joke, well, today, the joke's on you, my Asgardian friends!

The Gang look at Loki, then at each other.

BRAGI: I don't get it.

ODIN: Me neither. What joke?

LOKI: The - The horse! Sleipnir! Your new mount!

ODIN: Yeah?

LOKI: (smugly) I'M the father.

Silence...

BRAGI: I still don't get it.

NANNA: Yeah, me neither.

ODIN: -You're- the horse's father? Is that why it has eight legs?

BRAGI: Yeah, what's up with all the legs, dude? Is this a Jotunn thing, like - are you related to the mother? Is that why it's got all that extra stuff?

LOKI: What?! No, that's not - It's - The joke! The joke! The joke's on YOU!

THOR: Aaaahaha! Loki slept with his own mother!

ODIN: Loki, that's disgusting. Don't sleep with your own mother. Hey, guys, did you know that the extra legs make it go faster?

BRAGI: I did -not- know that. What about the heads, do they do anything?

Slow zoom on Loki's face. He twitches. Cut to credits.

Anyway else want in on this? I feel like the only way ancient myths and legends would work in modern television would be to make it a comedy.