>He's totally clean. Not even a speeding ticket.

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>>80158344
> it's like he didn't exist until two years ago

>>80158382
>before that, he was a ghost. No records

>Keep digging, I know he's hiding something

>I know I've seen this guy before, but where...

>I've nearly got a trace I just need 10 more seconds

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>tfw completely clean not even a speeding ticket

The thing is that I do often speed 5mph over the speed limit, just have never been caught.

>>80158344
>Here's the evidence, send it over to the eggheads at lab.

>c'mon, think dammit, think!

>He did a nickel upstate for armed robbery.

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>>80159980
>You've got 6 million

>>80158344
literally me

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>>80158344
stop making these threads
they stopped being funny and original

>No prints, he must have worn gloves. We're dealing with a professional here

>This guy played too many videogames

>>80159989
Monsters like you belong on death row.

>>80158344
>these right wing militias just won't stop murdering innocent colored people

>>80159989
nice blog reddit

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>don't do it, Jimmy
>Jimmy does it anyway

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>>80160293
>HAVE YOU EVER LANDED A PLANE
>NO BUT I'VE SPENT A LOT OF TIME IN PLAYSTATION SIMULATORS

>>80160182
Its responses like these that make me come back to tv

>>80160829
> Wants to keep it in thr family
> Keeps it in the pussy instrad

>his record is crisp
>you know what that means, right
>agent. possibly russian

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>In english, Doc?

>what does this do?
>NO! DON'T TOUCH THAT BUTTO-

>>80162103
> that _was_ plan B

>>80162131
>RUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNN

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> great, you shot the invisible swordsman

>>80160232
>find any bullet casings?
>No
>Exactly
>this guy's a mastermind. Probably not his first kill.

>>80158344
>Heh, not bad ...
>... for a human

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>Who IS that guy?

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>>80160868

>come on baby
>pulls accelerator to max
>HOLD ON
>shhhhhhhhhhhhrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

>two days before retirement

>>80160829
>put it back in his pants!
>it's too stiff, just let me slicken it up a little and it'll slide right in..
pure kino

>>80162422
and here comes the degenerate ruining the thread
let me remind you that this is a sfw board
I'm outta here

>same MO...
>you know what this means right?
>serial killer

>>80158344

I'm totally clean. Not even a reprimand for littering.

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>Just like the simulation

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>>80160182

>>80160182
>>80161913
>>80165347
Explain pls

I don't get it

>>80159989
5 over is not even speeding

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>>80160829

>>80159843
10/10

>>80163149
>Hey, calm down. You've done this over a million times in the simulator.
>Yeah... Yeah you're right. *deep breath* okay, lets do it.
>*BEEP BEEP BEEP*
>WHATS HAPPEBING

>>80159997
>>80159980
Kek

>>80162212
Yup

>>80162303
Fuuuuug

>No records, nothing. How the hell are we gonna find this guy?
>Uh, sir? He's at the front desk... just requested a meeting with you

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>>80158344
>"Let me just run this smudged, partial fingerprint through the database and-... We got a hit!"

>What?! This guys taking about 5 places on the most wanted! Arrest him!
>No can do, we need him.

>>80160182
I don't get it.

>>80160868
My mother and I went to see Fool's Gold literally because they had a line like that in the trailer.

>You're a loose cannon Gronkowski
>If you pull another stunt like that you're off the case
>Turn in your badge and your gun

>>80163149
WATS THE MATTA WITH YOU? WATS THE MATTA WITH YOU?

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>detective and partner enter coffee shop
>"hello have you seen this woman" *slides photograph across the counter*
>coffee selling woman: "oh im not quite sure i have bad memory tee hee. so anyways she came by about three weeks back wearing light blue jeans that were ripped on the left knee and a yellow blouse, she was there with a nervous looking man that kept fingering for something in his jacket pocket, that guy weirded me out. they paid cash for one espresso and one vegan late with extra foam"
>"alright call us if you remember anything else"

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>The question isn't WHERE are we?
>It's WHEN are we?

>>80159989
Kill yourself, scumbag.

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>Your little stunt in the public square yesterday nearly cost us 3 men! Not to mention property damage!
>But chief, I got the perp didn't I?
>listen here kid, you operate by MY rules, no more of this reckless behavior!

>He's so clean he's practically Canadian

One of the cringiest lines from Psych

All of these tropes seem so familiar but I can't remember a time when I've actually seen any of them on screen

>>80158344
It's parking ticket

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>How did you know?
>I designed it.

>>80162212
Mr Brooks did this,holy shit it was bad


>it's him
>how do you know
>the bullet casings are missing,we never reported that to the press

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>Sir, this is a no smoking zone!
>[character proceeds to smoke anyway]

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>wait
>go back
>there
>zoom in
>ENHANCE
>that's our guy
>let's move

>>80167322
That speeding ticket remark happens in Law & Order all the time.

> Did you really have to break so much furniture?
>You tell me, you had a pretty good view from behind your desk

>>80162639
holy shit kek

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>"sir, SIR! this isnt a designated street"
>character shits anyway

>>80167858
not many people here will get Bollywood memes, anon

>>80166096

and your other gun

>>80168258
and your other badge

>WAIT STOP
>There
>Zoom here
>"We got him"

>>80165521
nice blog, reddit

>gimme a cup of joe

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>Police chief loudly calls out a Hispanic officer by their last name

>>80159989
They only start to care if you're 10 over

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>>80168625
>HERNANDEZ YOU FUCKING BEANER GET THE FUCK IN HERE

>por que el cheffe?

>WE GOT A FUCKING SUSPECT AND I CANT UNDERSTAND HIS FUCKING MONKEY LANGUAGE

>>80159989
Has anyone ever been pulled over for doing less than 10 over?

>>80166096
>>80168258
And your OTHER other gun

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>>80168783
This actually made my day, thank you anon, thank you

I GOT THE MAYOR BREATHING DOWN MY NECK

>Jesus Christ, that's Jason Bourne

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>>80162212
>He policed his own brass

These made-up words mean nothing

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>>80159989
>tfw I've been pulled over right after smoking weed
I sucked down half a cigarette waiting for the officer to get to my window and he either didn't expect a thing or didn't care.

>Villain calls the police department
>Every officer in the building picks up the phone at the same time to listen in
>Villain makes it clear he knows they're all listening

>>80169131
>officer who first picks up the phone says "yes"
>silence
>officer places the phone on his shoulder make shout motions and points to his phone violently
>WE ARE TRACKING HIM, 50 SECONDS
>villain and lead detective carry out their battle of wits
>10 SECONDS
>detective: "you had a troubled childhood, didn't you villain"
>villain: "well well detective i have misjudged you"
>2 SECONDS
>villain hangs up
>FUCK

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>You're gonna be breaking in a new partner today Kockoraboraski
>But chief, I work alone

>>80169238
>Polish are stereotyped as stupid
>all movie cops are Polish

What did (((they))) mean by this?

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>>80169131
>>80169214

>>80167322
NCIS and CSI are the worst offenders. Law and Order used to be better, but SVU ruined that.

>>80167858
>>80167932
sensible chuckle

>Get back in there and get me a confession

>>80169214
>everyone looks at the guy on the tracking device
>shakes his head
>DAMMIT
>lead cop throws phone

>>80169379
>lawyer walks in
>"don't tell them anything"
>"this is a violation of my client's rights"
>"i'll have your ass for this"

>>80169506
>cop disconnects the camera
>roughs up the suspect

I swear this happened every episode on The Shield.

>There's absolutly, positively, no WAY I'm doing this
>the next scene is the character doing exactly that and saying "I can't believe I'm doing this"

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>>80159989
>pulled over twice
>each were a year apart
>able to expunge them from my record by playing CS:GO while some 6 hour video plays about driving safely in the background
>did the video thing for a friend for $300 because he really didn't wanna do it

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>>80169599
>>did the video thing for a friend for $300 because he really didn't wanna do it

>>80167226
90% of the show was tongue in cheek anyway

the parts that weren't really brought it down in later seasons

>>80169095
That must've sucked.

>>80168844
>>80168258
>>80166096
>Tfw rob gronkowski will never star in a buddy cop comedy with tom brandy

Feels bad man

>>80158344
>tfw no speeding ticket
>I still drive like complete shit tho

>>80169837
two cops who don't play by the rules while the chief looks the other way

wow, art imitating life, imitating art.

>>80166096
Bobrovsky!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=omZPhiT2PeQ

>But I didn't tell you my name.....

>>80158344
> give me ten miniutes.

>you have five

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>>80170719

>and you'll never have to

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>The baneposting was actually a CIA psyop

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>>80170719
hmmm...

good day.

These threads are infinitely better than baneposting. At least original content comes out of here.

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>>80159989
>get pulled over the other night for rolling a red light on a right turn
>officer comes up to my window
>sperg mode kicks in
>shaking like fuck
>stuttering
>"h-hello officer"
>"why are you so nervous"
>"I dont know, sir"
>"come on tell me what's going on, why are you nervous? Do you have illegal substances in the car?"
>exchange goes on for like 5 mins, guy probably thinks I'm on drugs, asks to search my car. Decline because I don't want my shit getting damaged, even if my car is a piece of shit.
>get a warning and two citations for missing docs
cool as a friggin cucumber

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>>80159989
>when a cop stops you for not wearing a fucking seatbelt

>>80169294
>I hate fucking polaks, officer
>Officer Kowalski

>>80170386
>tfw after several years of driving never properly learned how to park a car
Every time I try to park into any spot that isn't surrounded by empty spaces I dent somebody's shit like 50% of the time. I think I've scratched up like 3-4 paint jobs with my shitty driving. Now I just park in spaces that are completely empty or just a straight drive-in, I try anything more and I'm guaranteed to damage someones car.

how do I git gud?

>character goes undercover
>is asked a gotcha question about someone
>"yeah I worked with him. until he died 2 years ago"

>>80171968
How to handle it properly:

>officer knocks on window
>roll down window an inch
>inform officer that you are not a citizen of whichever state you're in, you are aware of your rights and that you do not consent to any searches

>undercover movie
>informant betrays the protagonist and tries to tell the gang that he's a cop
>cop outs him for doing shady shit
>gang kills the informant and completely forgets his accusations
name one movie where this scenario goes any other way.

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My fellow frogposters, are we a normalfaggot board?

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>>80171968
>guy is right behind me on the road with incredibly bright headlights
>brake check him
>it's a cop and he pulls me over

didn't even get a ticket

>>80166639
>detective and partner enter coffee shop
>"hello have you seen this woman" *slides photograph across the counter*
coffee selling woman: "oh im not quite sure i have bad memory tee hee.
>detective pulls out $20 bill
>"Maybe THIS will refresh your memory?"
>"Oh, yes I know who that is!"

>>80172327
No you fucking retard.

>officer knocks on window
>roll down window an inch
>"AM I BEING DETAINED OR AM I FREE TO GO AM I BEING DETAINED OR AM I FREE TO GO"
>inform him that you weren't driving the vehicle you were traveling and that you aren't a subject to US laws
>drive off if he insists you cooperate further

>>80172379
The Departed
Infernal Affairs

>>80172327
>>80172780
t. amateurs
let me tell you how its done
>light up a fatty
>roll down window a half centimeter
>"AM I BEING DETAINED?"
>before he can answer yell about your rights as a sovereign citizen and how he has no right to detain you, slip a printout of your list of rights out the window
>shoot the cop in the back while he's distracted reading your bullshit

>hello sir may i see your license and registration
>no i am a free citizen of earth, you may not detain me
>okay then you may go
its pretty easy of you use the proper language

>*types furiously on keyboard for 5 seconds*
>I'm in.

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>how do I know you're telling the truth
>you don't

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>>80174960
>but I'm the only chance you've got.

>character is shot
>"you've shot me."

>>80173870
>>80173131
>>80172780
>>80172327
>'license and registration, do you know how fast you were going?'
>'do you know how fast I was going?'
>officer groans, 'I'm gonna.let you off with a warning, I better not see you on my streets again'

>>80174960
>because you'd already be dead

>character opens up /tv/ front page in a new tab
>CIA.jpg is on the front page

>>80159989
>tfw after driving for 8 years got in my first accident a month ago

My life is OVER

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>"I love you"
>"I like you too"

>>80175195
>I love you, wife

>>80175226
Fucking lost in space.

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>>80158344
>movie take place in the future
>he's totally clean. not even a curse word

>YOU CAN'T FIRE ME, I QUIT!

>YOU CAN'T QUIT, I'M FIRING YOU!

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>I'm getting too old for this shit.

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>you don't know shit about space

It's not your forte

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>I don't need to remind you that _______

>>80162212
jack reacher was a good movie

>>80167479
Jesus christ this is every video with survellience of any kind

Also why does zooming make it CLEARER

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>>80167401
DUN DA DUN
DUN DA DUN

>>80175882
It doesn't. That's why you have to enhance.

>>80175882
>reminder that google is literally developing real ENHANCE technology to create accurate pictures from pixels

>>80175882
>zooming
you forgot the "enhancing" you retarded nigger

You know what you greasy fucking hater shitlords, why don't you write your own movie script if you think it's so god damn easy. You can sit here and post shitty frog memes and criticize """tropes"""", (which are really just expedient storytelling devices) but I can guarantee that if you were forced to write a script it'd either be full of them or terrible, or more likely full of them AND terrible.

You lazy NEETs have no idea what life for a script writer is like, tirelessly toiling over the existential metaphysical properties of your script, meticulously selecting the greatest storytelling device to convey a character's inner struggle in an easily understandable way, pumping out good (though, not masterful) script after good script week after week and month after month just so you can put a fucking can of Spaghetti-O's on the table for your family at the end of the month.

My life is a living hell, and I'm only reminded of just how terrible it is every time I come on /tv/ just to see my hard work criticized by unemployed racist assholes.

>>80175882
Of course it doesn't just get higher quality if you zoom in you fucking IDIOT

E n h a n c i n g you dip

>>80176511
>...and your OTHER copypasta

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>>80176511
>"No!"

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>Jesus, go to a lot of gun shows?

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>>80176511
saved AND checked

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>>80176187
>the supposed perpetrator is always a victim and vice versa

>>80173131
>>80172780
It's time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QCozh_vbYdM

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>>80175492
>takes place today
>He's totally clean. He doesn't even register on the Dominator!

>>80172327
Lawfag here. Do NOT do this.

Law enforcement now has a policy of essentially detaining sovereign citizens/freemen of the land on sight instead of engaging them and accidentally granting legitimacy to their bullshit. Instead of providing you with youtube footage to laugh at you'll get detained pretty quickly.

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>>80176779
>I DO NOT CONSENT
>I DO NOT CONSENT
>THIS IS POLICE BRUTALITY

>>80159989
MOM'S GONNA FREAK

>>80162212
>>80165651
>>80167433
>>80168975
>>80175854
i dont understand what the problem is

>>80167479
>>80175882
>>80176348
>>80176372
https://youtu.be/2aINa6tg3fo

>>80176779
>help, call the police
>we are the police
how retarded can these people get kek