Why did they have an axe on a spaceship?

>>80122090
To cut the wheat

>>80122090
Look at how cool and futuristic the bent handle is.

へ

>>80122110
real funny

>>80122090
to chop space trees

>>80122090
Why did they only bring flat asses with them?

>>80122110
the heck??

>>80122110
:へ)

Axe the director

>still no shoop turning the axe into a scythe

>>80122110
whyyou posting straw emojis

>>80122090
Wheat harvesting was a secondary objective.

>>80122600
Was harvesting wheat part of your plan?

>>80122090
Same reason they have axes on submarines, presumably.

What... You think they'd be able to fit a combine harvester on there? Pssh gimme a break kid.

you don't use axes for wheat harvesting you idiots

>>80122090
For real now, why did the axe ever become a meme? Were there really that many RLM-wannabe autists around that desperate for a reason to hate a new science-fiction sequel that the space-axe is still being posted about that many years later? This has to be the most confusing meme-criticism in existence. It's a fucking axe. It cuts things.

>>80123159
Why are you advertising ecelebs itt?

>>80123189
Because I am but one of several million members of a vast network of shills who are employed solely for the sake of selling popular things and promoting Israeli interests on 4chan. We're encouraged to occasionally confess this openly to confuse opposition.

>>80123026
>space axe
>space wheat

Different ballgame, kiddo.

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For wheat harvest.

>>80123232
wow you seem really smart and witty

>>80122090
To break down spacedoors in case of a spacefire or other such spacemalfunction on the spaceship. Or for spaceharvesting spacewheat as others have spacesuggested.

>>80122090

It's a space axe.

You know this because it's bent and probably not very good at chopping up firewood.

>>80122090
To axe that shitty series.

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>>80122090
>>80122108
Its a fire axe...

Please tell me I took bait and that you are not all legitimately retarded.

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>>80123380
fuck you

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>>80122090
why not?

IRL cosmonauts carry shotguns into space

https://warisboring.com/soviet-cosmonauts-carried-a-shotgun-into-space-a9e7852c6da5#.8r6t0hwi4

>>80122090
to be used in the exploration of the planet they were visiting ?

Why did they carry rovers armed with miniguns onto an asteroid in armageddon?

>>80123487
fire axes are meant to chop down doors and walls made of wood.

what good is a fire axe in a steel spaceship?

>>80124559
It's part of the lifeboat that crash lands. It could be needed to pry stuff on the ship to get out and then it could be used more outside the ship.

>>80124055
It was in case they re-entries into the fucking Siberian wilderness and needed to, you know, survive.

Fight primates

There's axes on the wall of the closet of Alien near the end. When she hides and climbs into the spacesuit in the escape shuttle, they're behind her in the shot.

>>80122163
the best post ive ever read on this site and not a single response

>>80122100
Is this board really so retarded that they can't comprehend plants and grains existing on other planets?

>>80124559
They are also used as crowbars, hence the shape - you can use it to lever open metal doors

>>80124727
>>80127347

Someone please screencap these so we can finally put this shit meme to rest.

>>80122090
Every ship has farming tools, in case they land on a planet with wheat

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>>80122090
really does imply thoughts

>>80123415
Under space rated

>>80122090
Because Lindelof is a retard.

>>80127613
If you legitimately think that axe has no use on a ship meant to land on planets then sorry, but the youre the retarded one

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>>80127536
They got the space axe, but they always forget the most important detail: the space bush

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>>80124749

>implying they are really in space, and not a swimming pool mock-up

>>80127536
thread over. nice try you fucks.

>>80127397
>>80127347
>>80124727
Should have bought a crowbar then

>>80129232
You can't fell giant wheat stalks with a crowbar

>>80122100
>>80122600
>>80122665
>>80123026
>>80123364
>>80123375
>>80123415
>>80127493
>>80129345

Any reason why wheat is suddenly a meme?

>>80122090
THIS MOVIE WAS TERRIBLE

>>80129893
http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi1466283545?playlistId=tt2316204&ref_=tt_ov_vi

>>80127536
That is one monstrous bush. Intriguing.

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>>80130604
Hey that's not true

>>80129893
marketing

>>80130869
Oh wow the alien thing burst into life .05 seconds after being removed from her womb, and it splashed ichy non acidic goo on her

Was this movie made for fucking children?

>>80122090
Space fires obviously.

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>>80131004
Maybe try not to take sci fi so seriously and you'll enjoy it I don't know man. I liked it. David was my favorite character.

>>80130869
>moments after this, stapled uterus still bleeding, she stumbles into a room full of people
>she neglects to tell them what just happened and no one asks because "oh my god the old dude is awake"
SHE JUST GAVE BIRTH TO A FUCKING ALIEN
WHY DOES NO ONE CARE ABOUT THIS

>>80131112
>My favourite character was bishop

>>80124055
IIRC they stopped using those cool cosmonaut guns though because they're too old. I think they just give them Makarovs now.

>>80131148
>>80131146
Crucify me dude I like a movie. Yeah they did not give a fuck they were getting prepared to go meet the engineers. I've seen the trilogy so what's the big deal. Prometheus is still nice to look at. Also this guy was great

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>>80131268
forgot the pic of course

>>80131268
Seriously how old are you?
16 is my unironicaly guess

>>80131004
That's amniotic fluid, not xeno blood.

When you hear a pregnant woman say her "water broke", she's referring to the amniotic sac rupturing and releasing the amniotic fluid.

>>80131322
24
should I kill myself too?

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>>80126586
Do I need to remind you this is actual dialogue from the new Alien movie.

>Oh look it's wheat
>Durr who planted it

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to keep in shape

>>80131337
Is it a typically green goo like fluid?

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>>80131112
>try not to take... [X] ... so seriously

STOP

>>80131346
Yes.

>>80131359
She's got great Grains

>>80131418
I unironicaly thought so

>>80131359
name?

>>80122090
We will never know

Thanks lindeldolf

>>80131337
>sploosh

>>80131373
It is, lots of iron content make it green.

>>80122090
Yeah lemme axe you sumthin?? *smacks lips profusely*
So you sayin? *sucks teeth*
So you sayin we wuz wheat n shiet??

>>80131440
Was Lindelof the greatest Hollywood conman I'm history?

>>80131146
You forgot the best part

>two doctors that she knocked out with extinguisher just calmly go with her and Weyland to the engineer, no questions asked

I guess they thought she disposed of it somehow, even though no one really knows what happened because no one asked.

That whole sequence is probably where the movie begins to follow its own dream logic and slowly dies.

>>80130869
One of the most disgusting gross out scenes I've ever seen. Alien is great for these moments.

>>80124559
Wow what was Ridley Scott this makes no sense now

>>80131373
It's a clear yellowish color.
Point is that it was part of her, not a foreign body like the chestbursters. Even then the chesterbursters don't emit any acid blood when they emerge.

IIRC the trilobite is never wounded in the film, so for all we know it doesn't even have acidic blood.

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>>80131591

>my face when they can't blame Lindelof for A:C and meanwhile he's 2 for 2 with The Leftovers

not saying he didn't help fuck things up, but it's clear that Ridley Scott didn't know what he was doing then or now

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>>80131635
pretty disgusting

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>>80131355
I really hope the underlying plot of this movie is weyland-monsanto trying to use the black goo to GMO supercharge the wheat they find on the planet. They take the xenos pure wholesome organic wheat farming and turn it into steroided cash crop wheat.

The rest is a look at the motivations of a simple farmer xeno, driven to be a killer because the normies took his land and his wheat and he is out for revenge.

A pure wheat kino and an expose on the motivations of the xeno, something we have never had in an alien movie before.

>>80131337
This guy is right.
This "machine" is holding the whole amniotic sac and when the alian is moving and breaking it, it releases all the amniotic fluid at once (which is about one liter for a average pregnant woman).

I am a paramedic in a rural area and i had to play delivery doctor 3 times.
The amount of amniotic fluid and blood is actually pretty correct, it even can be a bit green (not thaat much green, but i guess that it can vary).

It's funny.
There are sooo many things wrong in this movie, but you pick the one single thing which is actually not that much wrong.

I hope you guys will never witness an actual birth, if you can't believe this ;)

>>80126573
Go back to r eddit new fag

>>80130869
best scene in the whole damn film, best body horror in years

>>80127731
Source on that?

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>>80132010
This guy gets it

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>>80122356

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What the fuck was his problem?

>>80131954
wait... i have to clarify a few more things, because i bet that some "everything has to be 100% correct"-guy would complain about some other thing in this scene.

What you can complain about is:
1. that the amniotic sac did not immediately break when it got removed.. but the machine was holding it at the part of the alien, so i guess it's just a minor thing.
2. how she is ripping the umbilical cord out. (this would lead to massive bleeding)
3. the placenta is still inside and she would have to shit it out of her vagina 20min later

So basically you can complain that in reality an improvised abdominal delivery would look way more horrible.

>>80132755
Lack of wheat in his diet

>>80132188
that was his dad's axe

Have you ever heard the expression
Better to have it and not need it, than need it and not have it.

>>80132010
this desu

>>80122090
Very clearly a fire axe, you burke.