If the american wizards are supposedly way stricter in their

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>>79795225

What were you expecting from a prequel to one of the dullest franchises in the history of movie franchises?. Each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody, just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

>Uses accio only once for any practical reason when it could have been used at least three times to solve major problems
>takes a boat to the US instead of apparating (in the 1920's)

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Who gives a fuck, Jacob was fantastic and Queenie was best waifu 2016. Best blockbuster of last year easily.

>>79795225
TL;DR?

>>79795629
Progressive president was a shitty actress though.
Also,
>newt has a black girlfriend
>she's a lestrange
lmao

Why is JK Rowling so liberal when her works promote such a strong cultural solidarity? Wizards go through great lengths to separate themselves from everyone else.

>>79795699
Except that is constantly being portrayed as a bad thing in the potterverse.

>>79795629
Do redditors actually believe this piece of studio upvote groupthink trash whyfoo is good?

>>79795696
I agree with that, that actress was awful, but the main 4 were so damn cute together.

>>79795768
Actually, thinking that Fantastic Beasts was the best blockbuster of 2016 is /tv/ is fuck, Redditors would argue it's some MCU dreck or Deadpool until the day they die.

>>79795825
Actually you fucking star wars redditor, thinking Independence Day: Resurgence or London Has Fallen are the best blockbusters is /tv/ as fuck. Both promote VA and the things this board likes to pretend it promotes

>>79795917
No one is that contrarian bro

>>79795225
>If the american wizards are supposedly way stricter in their non interaction with muggles and want to distance themselves from them so desperately, how come they are copying literally every aspect of normie culture while the brits and every other nationality of wizards are actually living on their own terms with their own customs and traditions etc.?

America is a very young country anon, most of the Americans magic folk we see are probably second or third generation at best. Wizards and witches are born into nomaj families and that probably made up a sizable portion of the ones we see, so they assimilate quite easily compared to the UK's brand.

The elves and goblins being in on the scene was probably mostly exploitative.

>Everyone apparates constantly
>shield wall in the end
>flying wizards again
>priori incantatem yet again except this time the beam is blue because lol 1920's america amirite
>bigger on the inside suitcase, except this time it's bigger!
>pensive, except this time it's bigger and kills you!
>Leaky cauldron, except this time it's a speakeasy!
>Dragon shit referenced in a far away land
>Ministry of magic, except this time it's bigger!
>remember that enchanted roof with the inside weather from hogwarts? Here it is again!
The entire movie I felt like I was watching a demoreel of shit from the original series.

Did they introduce even a single original idea with any sort of effort put into it's conception?

>>79796182
Then how come they are being presented as if they are at the center of all governments in the wizarding world?
Seems like they were going after the "america fuck yeah" factor really hard. It's clearly marketed to an american audience.
Even the the character you're supposed to relate to and experience the introduction to the wizarding world through is a fat, bumbling american.

>>79796195
Yates shouldn't be allowed to touch these movies any more, DH 1 is literally the only passable one he's made.

>>79796294
I'm pretty sure the Salem Witch Trials happened in HP canon so their muggle relations are tense. I don't think that necessarily means they hate being American or American culture. They're still their own people like they are in Britain, but they have a much shorter descent from non-muggledom due to being only a couple centuries old and their government obviously being much newer.

>>79796195

I'm more concerned about their brutal execution methods like throwing someone into a vat of acid without fair trial or due process

>>79796643
Fair enough.
>>79797174
Yeah, what the fuck was the point of extracting their memory and making it seem like it would be a humane execution when they just place them into a fucking floating chair in the center and lower them into the acid at an agonizingly slow pace anyway?

>>79797283

fr, these guys didn't have guns or swords? surely it was more humane than "lets literally melt these fucks away"

The movie had an absurd amount of plot holes/terrible decisions. Like how Tina tried to get through hell and high water to warn her boss about the threat and her boss just goes "LOL YOU DIDNT DO SHIT YOU'RE JUST A CONSPIRATOR OFF WITH YOUR HEAD".

Also, they didn't wiped the memory of the bank administrator, who presumably later faced Jacob again and conveniently forgot he had broken into the vault.

And a fuckload of journalists took pictures of the magic storm, their memories might have been wiped, but you're not gonna tell me the spell destroys pictures too

>>79797568
>bank administrator
He was shown getting his mind erased by the magic rain during the MIB mindwipe scene.
>you're not gonna tell me the spell destroys pictures too
They literally showed it doing just that to newspapers.
That one still counts though as things had to actually be in contact with the rain for it to happen.

>Twice he takes a boat instead of apparating or using a port key

>>79795225
Just watched a rip.
The movie just felt too sterile and meh.
>CGI
>blatant 3D effects
>wand pewpew laser guns
>generic smoke cloud monster #846

>>79795225
>It's fucking shameful how creatively bankrupt hollywood has become
here... let me fix that for you
>It's fucking shameful how creatively bankrupt JK Rowling has become

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>>79798246
what do you expect from a literal Nazi?

>really want to see the American wizarding community
>fuck you here's another wizard government building

>>79795629
how the hell did someone like Queenie fall for Jacob

>taller
>blonde
>can read minds

HP movies are irredeemable piles of dull trash, which are extremely hard to sit through.

This one is a mediocre blockbuster.

Improvement all around, good for them.

>>79799466
>can read minds
You just answered it yourself. He's one of the few men to look at her and not immediately think lewd thoughts, she more or less said that herself, that he was one of the few people who was kind and genuine on the inside.

>>79795615
You can't apparate across continents

>>79799466
It was a different time

>>79795225
thought this was a nice movie to watch desu. It had fresh ideas, wasnt filled with pandering and some of the execution of the third act was shoddy.

but i liked the new characters, they werent rehashes and its nice to see scenes where characters just sit down and talk.

>>79799673
Brooms. Portkeys. Magical creatures. Magical vessels.

>>79799647
Literally the first thing she says to him is that most men think the same things he did when they first meet her. So he was most certainly thinking dirty shit.

>>79799837
Newt used a boat because he knew he couldnt get his creatures through wizard customs. why is that so hard to understand?

>>79799877
to be fair he was also drugged out of his mind

>>79799742
>It had fresh ideas, wasnt filled with pandering
Name some. Also, how was it not pandering? The entire thing was like a 4th of july parade with a democratic float of progressiveness at the front.

>>79799879
Probably because it is never even implied in the movie and you are just pulling it out of your ass right now as damage control.

Newt literally had no reason to bring Jacob along when he was trying to catch his creatures All he did was put Jacob in danger by asking him to hold on to that rhino musk an nearly got Jacob killed

Also he brought him inside his suitcase for reasons? Just to show off the creatures?

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>>79799927
>What makes...ALBUS DUMBLEDURR
>*long pause so audience can get hype at the mention of LE EPIC WIZARD*
>...so fond of u???

>>79795629
Daily Reminder that Michael Cera was shortlisted for the role of Jacob

>>79799974
The impression I got is that newt is pretty much and autistic loser and manchild.
So yeah, he just wanted to show off his awesome collection.
This makes sense especially given the comment about his brother and the fact that when he first showed off his suitcase zoo he flashed the swooping death thing right in his face.

>>79795760
Passive aggressive Monarchists. The Brits so love the class system no matter how they try to write against it.

>>79800029
literally makes sense in the context of the film since turns out he's grindelwald so hes actually jealous that dumbledore is banging newt's boipussi

>>79799927
how is it progressive when the black muslim female president is shown to be incompetent as fuck?

>>79799955
does everything have to be explained to morons like you?