Nu Star Trek

>>79288549
Because the plot needed him to. We can't have a Star Trek movie where actually earned the rank through hard work and dedication because that isn't cool enough.

>>79288549

Something like that the entire regular fleet was away, and they had to fill up brand-new ships with cadets, and the captain assigned them field ranks. NuKirk was made field-first officer and later couped the acting field-captian. For some reason the field ranks later were confirmed as regular ranks.

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>>79288549
D R O P P E D

>>79288549
Uhura kept her honor and refused to ride the Starfleet Commanders' cock carousel.

Kirk reveled in the chance and begged to be Bukkake in the end

>>79288620
this is why I hate NuTrek

Nepotism

Captain liked the kid, bent every rule to put Kirk in Starfleet, pardoned all of Kirk's shenanigans, and tolerated the fucktard because 'muh dad'

>>79288549
White privilege

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>>79288682

>All of Shatner's grandparents were Jewish immigrants (from Austria, Poland, Hungary, and Ukraine);[7][8] and he was raised in Conservative Judaism

>>79288549
That series never happened in this timeline.

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Yes, yes, well done Starfleet Academy Class of 2258, well done Cadets. All of you certainly deserve a promotion to the rank of Ensign.

HOWEVER, recent events must be taken into account, and I have a few last-minute promotions to award.

To Master James Rebellious Kirk, for being the son of the father who taught us all the true meaning of heroism, Lieutenant (junior grade).

To the Kobayashi Maru programmer anew, for having great untapped potential and a fateful destiny which beckons in your future, Lieutenant (full).

To the student whose actions weren't always prudent, for following your gut instincts and not the chain of command, Lieutenant-Commander.

To the sex king of your dormitory wing, for saving the universe with naught but two proud American fists, Commander.

To the boy who's beastie not in the leastie, for the hundreds of millions of dollars that we shall reap in ticket sales, Captain of the Federation Starship USS Enterprise NCC 1701.

Yes, yes, well done Kirk, well done Kirk.

THE HUMAN ADVENTURE IS JUST BEGINNING