What would you do on the holodeck?

>computer, generate a 90ft tall clone of Alison Brie
>computer, fill her stomach with half-digested curry, and loosen her sphincter muscle
>disengage safety protocols

>>79192299
Drink bleach you fucking spastic

Computer, generate me a friend.

>>79192379
The replicators recycle it for food.

>>79192379

Inside

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>wait for Captain Picard's birthday
>blindfold and earmuff him, tell him its a surprise meal
>take him to holodeck
>"Computer, create a birthday meal setting for Captain Picard.
>Computer, after a 5 minute delay, have 500 x Prince Yahshua's appear
>Have all Prince Yahshua's sexual interest at maximum level and they believe the captain is a young blonde female
>disable all safety protocols

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>>79192393

>File not found

>>79192245

>computer, generate a wooden tool bench with wrist and ankle restraints. Then generate 4 copies of dr crusher, 4 copies of counsellor troi and have them both 8 months pregnant and are constantly lactating. When I'm strapped in, have them shoot titty milk all over me whilst a copy of guninan jerks me off. Finally, I want a copy of commander riker crying in the corner

>>79192400
NOOOOOOOOOOOO. someone has to come mop it up!

>>79192393
>redlettermedia.exe initiated, sir

>>79192245
>computer, everytime someone says "holodeck", "computer" or "override", lock the door for 5 minutes and fill the room with fart gas while playing the Ride of the Valkyries.

>>79192245
honestly I'd just recreate the ships bridge in the holodeck just to fuck with the senior staff

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I would do t swift

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>>79192245

>Computer, recreate my bedroom from when I was 5 years old
>place a stretch arm strong on my lap and my childhood dog next to me as he sleeps
>Have my Dad enter the room and spend time with me playing with toys and our dog for a full hour
>repeat this loop
>disable all safety protocols

>>79192245
Computer, create an exact replica of the enterprise on the holodeck and transport all sleeping crewmembers into it.

See how long it takes them to realize.

>computer, generate a button that kills god when pressed
>disable safety protocols

checkmate muslims

>>79192299
dumb frogposter

Sexy sex with all the sexy people

>>79192245
Take Worf to the battle of pelenor fields.

>>79192245
Simulate my parent's basement, but with man cave, game gen, 1980s Steven Spielberg universe motif. Then hang out with friends.

My parents & 3 of my best friends died in a van crash over 20 years ago.

Or, go fishing with my dad.

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>>79192245
Same as Barclay, but the women would be naked.

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>>79192953

>>79192393
>vinesauce.exe loading

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>>79192953
D-dude.

>>79192957
Dr Bashir I'm Section 31

>>79192712
Bashirfag where you at boi?

>>79192245
Nude Tayne

>You're walking along inside the holodeck..etc etc....

>wat do?

>>79192953
whats it like having a personal tragedy like that? some times I wonder if something like that happened to me i'd feel sort of shamefully cool about it. like it would make people go "woah that dudes been through some shit"

yeah yeah im an asshole but you know what im talking about or is it just pure bummer?

>>79192245
>Computer generate a female version of me

I'd legitimately watch one of the new Star Trek movies if they moved it along to TNG era and had some holodeck shenanigans
Too fun for JJ

>>79193153
It is unadulterated numbness for a few years. Like being a ghost. I think that is impart due to the fact that I didn't need to struggle for basic needs after it happened. If I did then I'd probably done a lot better. Sometimes other people's kindness is a detriment.

And, I wouldn't be here posting on 4chan.

>>79192245
It really depends on if it breaks down or not.

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>>79193069
Haven't seen her lately. Was fucking disgusted to find out she was a grill. This is genuine Bashirfag reporting in.

>>79192953

So why were your parents hanging out with your friends? i dont get it.

>>79193096
Not computing, please repeat.

>>79193431
Returning from a cub scout camping trip.

>>79193462

Where you in the van too? Who was responsible for the crash?

rough sex with a 9 foot tall dr crusher

dick vore with a socially awkward dragon

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>>79192453
>you will never talk with Mike about Star Trek all day

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>>79192245
>computer, create a universe where I'm not a fucking loser
>unable to comply with your request ... virgin

>>79192245
>computer, generate a copy of my wife
>computer, generate a selection of 10 NFL players chosen by the highest overall combined skin darkness and body weight
>now give them extreme sexual urges for my wife
>disable safety protocols

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>Computer, whenever any holographic instance of Ensign Wesley Crusher is generated in a Holodeck, program him with a insatiable lust for Doctor Beverly Crusher.
>Computer, replace the meaning of any command issued by Doctor Beverly Crusher in a Holodeck with the following: "Generate a simulation of Wesley Crusher and seal the Holodeck doors."
>[Alert: That command violates eleven safety protocols.]
>Delete the fucking protocols. Authorization Barclay-Barclay-Broccoli-Boy-Alpha-Niner.

>>79193513
I was. Drunk driver crossed the freeway medium. 3 people survived; me, my grandmother, and the drunk driver. A total of 8 people died in 3 vehicles.

>>79193569
I'm sorry my sensors didn't catch that, could you speak up a little?

>>79192245
Probably just have lots of sex with historical figures or celebrities

>>79192245
Live out every sexual fantasy I've ever had.
Including vore.

> computer, generate grassy hill on a beautiful summers day complete with daisy flowers and occasional flock of birds
> computer, include picnic table with full trimmings

>>79193844
> computer, program a herd of horses. All stallions, pure bred, strong and fast
> program then with insatiable lust for human feeeemales and a hunger for clothing
> computer call seven of nine to the holo deck, lock the door behind her on my code only
> disengage safety protocols

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>mostly sexual stuff

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>>79193844
>Note: This file has been recently modified by: Crusher, Wesley
>Would you like to continue? Y/N
>Y
>Running: Agoraphobia.exe, Anaphylaxis.exe
>Initiating insect swarm
>Safety controls disengaged
>Sealing bulkheads
>Initiating warp
>Jettisoning holodeck

>>79192245
>computer, generate 3 kristina pimenovas aged 8, 10 and 12.

This almost covers it

Jessica Biel
Bridget Regan
January Jones
AnnaSophia Robb
Scarlett Johansson
Evangeline Lilly
Katheryn Winnick
That one girl from work with red hair
Elizabeth Banks
Jodelen Ferland
Keri Russell
Holly Taylor
Jeri Ryan
Ivanka Trump
Milla Jovovich
Haley Atwell
Kate Beckinsale
Amy Adams

>>79193348
She was hot tho. She posted a couple pics of herself

>Computer turn me into a cute anime girl
>Computer make me the MC of a CGDCT 4koma

>>79193714
Perfect

>>79194154
Nice list.

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>>79194154

Computer - Mackenzie Foy, Raffy, and Angourie Rice, bound.

>>79192245
Tennis Pro-am.
Top tennis lookers, plus celebs. Losers end up as sex slaves to me

Yes, i know I am fucked up.

I'd want to have Helena Bonham Carter, Winona Ryder and Eva Green made into centaur females for me to fug

Do they ever explain how you can walk long distances in a holodeck program when you are in fact inside a limited space? Indeed it's not a very large room at all.
So when you get near the wall, does the floor rotate and face you in another direction whilst seamlessly adjusting the holographic imagery to suit? And how does this not fuck up your relative positioning to other people who are in the same program with you?
Please Star-Cucks tell me which episode thhey explain this in.

>>79195280
forget how it is explained, but do recall that the entire set for "Elementary dear data" fit on a sound-stage smaller then the holodeck room.

>>79195280
I remember one episode where they transport a group of aliens into the holodeck without their knowledge and they have to keep them all together or the simulation will start degenerating but they never mention the possibility of two of them being more than the width of the holodeck room apart in physical space. Can't remember the name of the episode though

>>79195280
I think the floor kinda scrolls if you get too close to the edge.

If you move in one direction and another person stands still, you will eventually hit an invisible wall when the distance between you is room-length.

>>79195280
As soon as you issue a holodeck related command to the computer the holodeck is flooded with vaporised chloroform, your unconscious form is then dropped through a series of tubes and tunnels into a tank filled with amniotic fluid and the computer projects whatever you requested directly into your brain through a series of very fine needles inserted through the ears, nose and pupils that interface directly with the brain
t. memory alpha admin

>>79195280
the hologram projects optical illusions that trick people into walking in circles

>>79195280
Sliding force field floors and optical illusions

>>79193153
The bad times will come for you too, anon. Then you'll know exactly how 'cool' it is.

And learn that stranger's shallow opinions of you are transient, worthless; but the important people in your life are gone for good,

>>79192245

>computer, generate a meadow in late May, just as spring blooms
>computer, generate fuzzy blanket
>computer, generate a homely girl with an uncontrollable urge to hold hands and cuddle

ya'll watch too much porn.

>>79192953
>tfw just said bye to my mom before I left for work and now talking to both of my best friends on facebook messenger on the train to work

sorry bro

Computer, generate someone who will love me.
>error, unable to fulfill request. Please specify different parameters.

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>Computer. Generate a 9 year old Taylor Swift in a cute dress.
>Lock all doors and disengage safety protocols.

COMPUTER, replicate an authentic reply to this comment that perfectly simulates the pinnacle of the 4chan board '/tv/' at the height of its intellect during the 21st-century.

>>79194154
>jeri ryan
muh fuckin nigga
imagine fucking her ass while she wears a 7o9 bodysuit

>>79195780
I always wondered. Where does your semen go to? I mean, you're cumming into a hologram. Surely it just flops on the floor and some poor sod has to clean the Holodeck after each visit?

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>>79195383
>>79195447
>>79195469
>>79195510
>>79195612
How did Belanna skydive in the holodeck?

>>79195808

That's a big request for you hah

>>79195823
on the floor and the ship cleans it self

Computer, simulate a world where the Americans didn't force the British and the French to destroy their Empires in order for Americans to gain more shekels and all the resulting chaos (Israel for example) that happened because of this.

>>79195823
I feel like they'd have a robot that pops out of a little hole in the wall that cleans up anything after people leave. It's not really a big space, so it'd be pretty easy.

>>79195829
the same way jules and o'brien fought the red baron

>computer, generate 100 copies of adolph hitler
>disengage all safety protocols

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>>79192245
>computer, simulate white suburban american city circa 1995-1999
>computer, make me white and american

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Computer, redpill me.

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>>79196066

>Computer, generate a copy of every crew member's family, have them tortured in the most horrible way imaginable, record it and then send a copy to the respective crew member and make it so that it automatically starts playing once they receive it.

>>79192641
>rat face
>pushup bra
>stiiick
>arrogant cunt
yeah, no

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>>79196613
push these up, fuccboi

>>79195823
>computer teleport semen into worf's mouth

>>79195655
>too much porn
I don't follow
I understand the individual words but the concept of what you're trying to convey is completely lost on me

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>Computer, identify the function of your subroutine, designation Gamma-Ought-One.
>[Subroutine G01 responds with a verbal warning to any command containing a violation of safety protocols.]
>Computer, reprogram subroutine Gamma-Ought-One to no longer issue a warning, but instead to permanently disengage whichever safety protocol it was going to warn about.
>From my mark onward, forward video recordings of all accidental injuries aboard the Enterprise to my personal computer.
>Mark.

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>>79196066

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>>79192245
>Computer generate an enormous maze with a tower in the middle.
>Put me on the tower.
>Computer generate 50 Alison Brie's wearing sexy skimpy outfits on the outside of the maze
>Give them all castration/circumcision instruments
>Make them 50% weaker than me.
>Computer give me a megaphone
>FUCK YOU BITCHES YOU'RE ALL FAT!

Then the rape game's afoot.

>>79196892
they aren't already 50% weaker than you?

>>79197708

I got hyper-mobility syndrome and I'm not 20 anymore, so.. shits starting to hurt.

>>79196702
>scratch that, computer
>instead teleport every man's unejaculated semen on this ship into worf's mouth and rektum, 40:60 ratio

>>79198273
>not just 2:3 ratio
Stupid Pakled.

>Computer, create the perfect waifu

>>79195823
It gets beamed back into the food replicators and broken down to be recycled. Nothing goes to waste in a long space mission.

>>79192953

omg my feels!!! bros im getting comfy and EATAN and DRANKAN maybe some Star Trek vidya :3

my feels bro we're all gonna make it...you're gonna carry that weight anon!!!

>tfw dyel
>based spock tfw spock was based

bros... w-we're all gonna make it ;__;

>>79192840
Oh so that's what we're gonna do now, huh? We're gonna feel?

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>>79198841