ITT characters whose storylines you didn't expect to make you cry

>>79127816
Why the FUCK didn't Newt just put him in his suitcase until the whole thing blew over?

>>79127842
>traveling around with a strange twink you just met the other day

the ending made sense. he wasn't gonna uproot his life to accompany people whose world pretty much will never accept him.

Did he remember in the end?

>>79127900

There's other non magic losers in their world though. He could have hung out with them.

Also I really hope the guy notices this thread.

>expect him to be the fat wakey sidekick
>hes actually the best character in the movie

>>79127918
Implied that he did

>>79127921
It's not like he knew that. Like what he said to his 3 waifus, "it was for the best"

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>>79127900
>Not wanting to uproot his life to ravage Newt's sweet virginal boi cunt every night with his fat Jew dick

Is Jacob gay or something?

>>79127816
He was a very likable character. I was surprised how much they really captured the magic of the original saga and repurposed it into something new. Truly a great flick.

>>79128105
I wonder if he will accompany them in the next movie. That would be great.

>>79128105
yeah i liked how he's a war veteran and he's actually the most level headed and practical out of all of them. felt refreshing desu. and he was able to snag a hot chick who still wanted him even while being able to read his mind and know all of his disgusting fantasies about her.

finally a character who's like me in harry potter.

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>>79128209
I bet you're not a war veteran, you're not level headed, and you don't have a hot gf either.

If anything we are like Newt. Autistic, borderline retarded, hated by everyone and forever cucked.

>>79128105
>Truly a great flick
This is bait right?
It was awful. Disconnected plot. Fat dude was the only character even remotely likable.

>>79128271
>It was awful.
I enjoyed it.
>Disconnected plot.
I thought it was pretty straightforward.

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>>79128271
>disconnected plot

My 10 year old daughter understood everything quite well. Are you sure you don't suffer from etsubatsu?

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>>79128253
>If anything we are like Newt. Autistic, borderline retarded, hated by everyone and forever cucked.

Not to mention carrying around a briefcase (folder) full of little frogs and shit (pepes)

>>79128432
Holy shit anon

Why did the floating chair in the execution room dissolve in the death potion? Do they have to bring in a new chair every time they execute someone?

>>79128738
Yeah why didn't they just use a gun or something?
Not magical enough?

>>79128432
>Also carrying around an evil by-product of abused children that was illegal everywhere
>was "studying" it

Did Newt get caught with CP on his browser?

>>79128799
Or why not just Avada Kedavra them? Was that not invented until later? Is it like a wizard atom bomb?

>>79128738
death potion only went crazy when they threw a wand into it.

>>79128271
more proof that morons only like characters who quip. newt is an antisocial weirdo which makes sense for someone who works with animals. pretty easy to relate to him if youre an introvert.

>>79128432
kek

>>79128819
It's an ancient spell, but literally tears apart the soul whenever it's used.

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>>79128801
That's why Newt was expelled from Hogwarts. Pretty sure he also wanted to fuck Credence who is basically a child.

>>79128864
>be just like Newt in almost every way
>love animals more than anything
>local wildlife rehab has a vacancy
>find out that literally everyone else employed there is either a Chad or a Stacey
>Staceys laugh at me every day
>get told to fuck off after I'm caught crying in the bathroom

Felt bad man.

>>79128913
The killing curse doesn't do that, where does it say it treats apart your soul? That's what the curse to create a Horcrux does

>>79129151
You literally use the killing curse to create a Horcrux retard

>>79129198
So what? The act of splitting your soul into multiple repositories is what diminishes it, not the use of a killing curse. Slughorn says that the killing has to be a really evil killing, not just an average self-defense or execution killing, and it's strongly implied that a complex ritual has to be prepared for the killing to achieve the creation of a Horcrux.

That's like saying that a knife is evil because some knives were used in human sacrifices

>>79129272
Well yes I agree with you there, but you insisted that the killing curse is not what creates horcruxes which is not true.

>>79129151
It fucks up your soul but jkr hasn't revealed how

>>79129118
I thought people who love animals are supposed to be all autists?

>>79129314
Point taken. The killing curse is the apex of a dark ritual which must be completed in its entirety in order to manifest a horcrux. In that context the Avada Kedavra is soul-damaging.

That doesn't mean the killing curse is intrinsically damaging to the soul, such as if the American magical congress used it to kill condemned prisoners. Which is why my original question may not have an answer.

>>79129366
Ugh is this more interview "canon"

Rowling is seriously getting as bad as Lucas about going back to revise her work in retarded ways

>>79128913
But then why did the entire MACUSA pelt Credence with like 100 killing curses?

>>79127816
This movie made me sad because I know I will never be able to find a boyfu as cute as Newt.

>>79129414
she only provides info when asked very specific questions. but other than that she presumably reveals it in other ways.

lucas can't keep his lore consistent. jkr already knows the lore, she just doesn't want to reveal it yet for some reason, like how horcruxes are made and stuff.

>>79129485
those weren't killing curses

>>79129660
Then what were they? The killing curse is special because it's the only curse capable of killing a person on the spot.

>>79128253
>and forever cucked

But he gets married to the woman he was interested in right from the start. And I doubt any of us have his boyish charm, our autism is the irredeemable type.

Are they doing Potter X-Mens? Regular girl reads minds, Grindelwald is doing heavy telekinesis with hands, not wand. What else?

>>79127816
>storylines you didn't expect to make you cry

Too many anon,too many.
When you try to repress you depression you cry like a bitch all the time.

>>79129711
Queenie > Tina, he lost out however you spin it.

>>79129727
When the fuck did Grindelwald do heavy telekinesis? Wandless magic has always been a thing. All he did was flip a car.

>>79129727
Queenie can read minds because she's a legillimens, it's just an innate thing for her like Tonks being able to shapeshift without a wand. Wandless magic has always been possible, you just need to be exceptionally talented and powerful to do it.

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>>79129711
Also doubt /tv/ anons could look like a girlier Jessica Chastain just by throwing on a wig.

>>79129786
>he lost out however you spin it.

He never wanted her though. You can't lose something you never wanted to begin with.

>>79127842
I kind of figured he'd invite him back to Britain where muggles are allowed to know shit about the wizarding world without being mind wiped.

Not permanently or anything, just until the heat's off.

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>>79129786
>Queenie > Tina, he lost out however you spin it

Why would he even need either of them when he himself is obviously best girl?

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>>79129838
I wonder how many people who worked on that movie groped, fingered or fucked Eddie. He did say in interviews that he found the role scary and humiliating.

>>79129887
I think muggles can only know in Britain under special circumstances, like if they marry into it or their kid is a muggleborn or they're a high level government official.

>>79129958
>He did say in interviews that he found the role scary and humiliating.

That sounds like it would trigger SJWs, did he really say that?

>>79127942
witnessed

>>79127918
>>79127918

LOVE CONQUERS ALL EVEN MAGIC

Seriously, he was a cool dude and a pretty good baker. Newt was the quintessential autism asperger crusader.

>>79127816
Wait just a fucking second...

Is that the Balls of Fury guy?

Holy shit.

>>79130052
>Newt was the quintessential autism asperger crusader

That's pretty rare to find in the main protagonist desu

>>79128105
I thought the film was garbage, looked like some shitty slapstick comedy with cartoon animals everywhere

>>79130091
Fanboys too. He made it...

>>79130013
https://www.google.co.za/amp/www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/films/news/eddie-redmayne-reveals-he-found-full-frontal-nude-scene-embarrassing-in-the-danish-girl-a6747256.html

Eddie's smart. He got a lot of shit for his role so he quickly learned how to pander.

>ywn subject his sweet, vulnerable, trembling body to your vicious and predatory cis male gaze

>>79130149
He gets to work with some fucking babes, then.

Kristen Bell, the Asian chick from BoF....

>>79130160
>Just walking onto a set filled with men, watching the difference in how you’re treated, or the scrutiny…the gaze was overwhelming,” he said. “A lot of the women I worked with said, ‘Yeah, welcome to our world.

Sounds like he got a stiffy from being looked at lewdly by men.

>>79129682
we will never know because yates is a hack who loves when spellwork is just a bunch of flashes of light. but for example even when grindelwald and newt were duelling they were firing similar shooty flashy spells at each other

>>79129887
yeah but why would he want to do that? he'll never be a wizard, it'll just depress him more knowing he cant do magic. i'd rather go back to not knowing a superior world exists rather than live life realizing i'll never be part of it because of my genetics

>>79130091
he has a tony award. glad he finally got the attention he deserves desu.
>at comic con people asked him if he was sad that he was the only non magic-user in the film
>he quickly replies "han solo wasn't a jedi"
pretty based

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>>79130160
well this just confirms my suspicions that redmayne really does want to be a grill

boner no

>>79130352
Han is a shitty meme character though

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>>79127816
why do you make me sad like this. this whole film seemed to me like an alternate universe planes trains & automobiles, and now i really see why. that man's a damn john candy lookalike.

>>79128253
Newt did fight in the War. He just wasn't a war hero like his brother.

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>>79130307
>ywn mercilessly sexually harass Eddie on the set of The Danish Girl
>ywn make lewd comments about his body while he blushes furiously and walks away on his high heels
>ywn sneak your hand up his skirt or down his blouse any chance you get, laughing as he calls for security in his panicked little voice
>ywn wait until there's nobody around and pull him onto your lap, one hand around both his skinny wrists, the other tugging his panties aside to expose his cunny
>ywn penetrate him over and over with your fingers and cock while he struggles feebly, first threatening to call his lawyer then moaning and begging pitifully as the pleasure becomes too much

>>79127816
best theme
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=36SepIs5cHk

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>>79130160
>>79130307
>>79130388
>>79130551

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>>79127816
Lol, what kind of pathetic millennial numale faggot cries at one of the dullest franchises in the history of movie franchises?! Each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though r-right
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

eddie is, without a doubt, the ugliest fucking actor i have ever seen in my life and i feel physically angry when i have to see his face

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>>79130551
The fact that this most likely happened to him makes it even better.

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>>79130635
>and i feel physically angry when i have to see his face

That's just because he looks female and it confuses and scares you

>>79130782
no i think its his mouth, its too big and it just unnerves me (so does the rest of his face actually)

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>>79130782
What do I have to do to get inside Eddie, man

>>79128819
>>79128913
In the Order of the Phoenix (I think), Harry tried using the Cruciatus Curse on Bellatrix, but it didn't work right. "You need to mean them, Potter! You need to want to cause pain - to enjoy it - righteous anger won't hurt me for long..."
So using AK as a just, execution spell wouldn't work. You have to want to murder someone, with hate and malice.
>>79129682
No it isn't. If you hit someone just right with a Stunning Spell, it can kill them. Or, whatever Molly used on Bellatrix killed her on the spot.

>>79130552
the music was indeed pretty kino. I liked the HP soundtracks 1-3, 4 onwards was really forgettable but the music in this one was catchy.

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>>79130817
>its too big

All the better to suck your dick with.

>>79129682
the killing curse is special because it kills someone but leaves no trace of damage on the victim's body

>>79130817
That's IT!!! He's got an oversized mouth like the Mouth of Sauron or the door gunner guy from Rogue One.

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>>79130932
he knows

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>>79130635
>this qt lady
>ugly

literally no taste.

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>>79130986
I-i-is this real?

>>79130986
Post that interview he did where he acknowledges his DSL

>>79129151
The act of killing splits the soul. A horcrux just holds a piece of it.

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>>79130932
DICK

SUCKING

LIPS

>>79130986
>yfw Eddie browses these threads and sometimes even posts in them
>yfw Eddie's fingering himself to our posts as we type

>>79130837
>tie Oscar to a fishing pole
>dangle it in front of Das it mayne
>slip your penis into his boypucci while he's transfixed by the award
>continue holding the fishing rod while jackhammering into his tight cunt
>the possibility of getting another Oscar is enough for him to cum untouched
>let Oscar drop into his grasp as reward
>he'll be so overwhelmed that he won't notice you cumming inside him and discreetly slipping away after

I did this before and it worked, good luck anon.

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Best character in the movie

>>79130629
Good job anon, this pasta doesn't get posted nearly enough.

>>79131717
Teddy is a boss. Watched this film with my gf last week and had to try really hard not to cry at the end.

>>79127816

The whole movie made me cry, because it sunk in that I actually paid money to see such a piece of shit movie.

>>79132161
>insults made up by grade schoolers

Sad!

>>79131389
But then I won't get to fuck him with the Oscar.

>>79127816
Literally Hermione Granger and Harry Potter

Yates did it

>>79127842
>>79127918
>>79130052
It's been a while so I don't remember it, but there was an offhand line about the thing that bit Jacob that could explain why he memory came back.