ITT: Pokemon are real. What would your gym be like? Rules

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>>9117595
It's fine, man. It's fine. ...And, uh... thank you.

...So uh, what's your name?

>>9117460
(Oh, also, yes, this is what we want. Sorry for not replying earlier. -Chespin's RPer)

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>>9117410
yep
pokemon league champ of both kanto and johto
gonna add hoenn to the list soon
probs strongest battler around atm
ruby might be stronger but fucking
four legendary team doesnt count

>>9117604
im gay

>>9117681
same

>>9117681
>Not being pan master race

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>>9117627
>he smiles and writes
>"my name is luca"
>"that was what granny said"

>>9117705
>trusting and liking females
how?

>>9117681
im a girl

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>>9117718
Luca, huh? ...That's a nice name.

...I uh... I'd tell you mine, but... I don't really have one yet... my first trainer just referred to me by the number she put on my egg before I hatched, and... well, my second trainer didn't give me a name, either. All he gave me was... well, these burns...
>Chespin gives a sigh.
I uh... I guess... just call me Chespin?

>>9117734
There are a few, on occasion

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>>9117773
>"i can't call, but i'll write it"
>"and when you give yourself a name i'll write down too"
>"you are a nice friend chespin"

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>>9117669
Well that sure is some kinda rap sheet. Here I am little Johnny farmboy talkin' to fancy pants Dave.
...You've seen legendary pokemon before?

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this almia place is pretty quiet
the beaches are also pretty nice

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>>9117841
>Upon hearing that, Chespin lets down his guard a bit. Or, well... what little guard he had.
Yeah... you are too. ...Thanks.
>Chespin gives the kip a relieved smile.

>And now, purgatory until someone adopts them or something else happens.

>>9117861
oh man just wait until you meet n
the living cabbage
just wait

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>>9117924
>luca puts the notebook down
>he smiles
... .... ...
>he tries to talk again, but to no avail

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>>9117861
pffft yeah
>Dave gestures a thumb at Necrozma
aint your average rock
plus ive met zekrom through n aaaand registeel rayquaza latios and kyogre through ruby
oh also
>Dave pulls a Pokeball off of his belt
ive got this guy
>Out goes Heatran

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>>9117926
Yes? Did you need me for something?

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>>9117926
Living cabbage?
>>9117988
>Johnny seems sort of flabbergasted.
...That's really something.
>He watches Dave's Heatran from his mudsdale.
What's it do? Don't they all have legends or somethin' they do?
>>9117997
...Are you the cabbage?

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>>9118050
...I have been called such, yes.

im poke-ayyy

>>9118100
are you a clefairy?

>>9117924
>>9117982
(sorry for taking so long)
(what region is this in, by the way?)

>a man walks into the adoption center, looking around nervously
>his venomoth flutters in behind him, looking around at all the other pokemon before gliding over to luca and the chespin who probably also has a name but if he does I've missed it
>the guy, whose name is robert, is busy talking to the staff about all the different kinds of pokemon they have available for adoption and what they think would be best for a novice trainer like him
>venomoth lands nearby
>curious moth noises

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>>9118111
(Adoption center's in Lumiose, and the Chespin has no name)
>The roasted Chespin blinks softly, then smiles at the moth.
Uh, hello there. Who're you?

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>>9118111
>he looks at the venomoth
>he smiles, but doesn't say anything

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>>9118050
uh yeah
theyre supposed to be volcanoes
check it
heatran?
magma storm that tree
>Heatran roars, the ground beneath him glowing and cracking
>A split forms along the ground up to the tree, at which point magma and fire spew forth in a twister of heat and rock, catching the tree ablaze
pretty cool right

Trainer here.
What's a good place to meet some strong trainers? Somewhere that isn't the underground battle clubs or Catalyst.

>>9118188
You could do the Gym Challenge, then challenge the Elite 4 of a region. Who knows, perhaps you'll become a champ

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>>9118188
Um... I go to the Battle Tree! I think most regions have something like that...?

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>>9118097
So you know about the Zekrom thingy? Is that your name, by the way, Mr. Cabbage?
>>9118184
Woah...
Isn't havin' something like that kinda dangerous?

>>9118200
I don't think my team is anywhere near good enough for that. I've got a few bugs.
>>9118225
Hoenn doesn't really have anything like that but I'll see.

>>9118271
Well, from what I know of the Gym Challenge, it does a decent job of stepping trainers up from your level to being ready to face the E4. Just take it step by step.

Start with your first gym and work your way up.

If you aren't ready for that, you could always be a gym trainer for a while.

>>9117737
>Girl
>4chan
>My sides

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>>9118227
No, my name is "N". Yes... Like the letter. Zekrom is my partner. I believe most people refer to it as an "Ace Pokemon" now, but I prefer not to do so.

>>9118155
>>9118178
(alright, thanks)
(of course right after I post my internet decides to kill itself for a bit, fuck)
>venomoth flaps it's wings a little and tilts it's head, then looks back at rob, who seems to have finally taken notice
hey there, found some friends?
>the staff member leads rob over to the three pokemon
>rob smiles at the chespin and then at luca
I guess you two are friends then?
want to come with me and venny here?

>>9118271
Isn't the battle frontier a Hoenn thing?

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>>9118227
i mean
yeah
if you dont know what youre doing
ive had heatran for a long time though

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>>9118351
>Chespin glances over to the kip, smiles up to the nice-looking trainer.
I wouldn't mind that. ...Thank you.

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>>9118271
I thought you guys had the Battle Tower thingy... Or the Battle Frontier... Or something like that?

>>9118315
I'll see about it. I put in an application with Catalyst a few days ago and none of them have gotten to me.
>>9118379
>>9118396
(Sorry I'm going by it never having been completed since it wouldn't make sense with Anabel.)
Not as far as I know. Seems like they never finished the Frontier.

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>>9118351
>he nods happy
>>9118382
>he picks the notebook
>"that's great, we found a friend"

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>>9118413
(Oh, I know. Sun doesn't know that it's not an actual thing - he just one mention or so on the news and assumed it got completed a while ago)
Awww, whaaaat? The Johto one was really cool, that sucks!

>>9118413
>I put in an application with Catalyst a few days ago and none of them have gotten to me.

you know N posts here
right

>>9118413
What Region you in, kiddo?
I'm a hardcore Trainer and I'm always up for a fight.
Just be sure to bring your A-game.

>>9118382
>>9118435
>rob has no idea what chespin is saying, but notices the smile
>what kind of noises would a chespin make anyway?
alright, I'll take that as a yes
>walks off to go fill out a bunch of paperwork for the adoption
>venny the very creatively named venomoth does a little loop in the air, hovering near the two scarfed pokemon

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>>9118467
(*He just saw one)
>>9118413
Hmmm...? Where did you apply at? They must have failed to send the application to me... Or I merely missed it, in which case I apologize. This happens from time to time.

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Clothing business isn't going too well.
Any suggestions for selling surplus garments?

>>9118467
Sorry, champ. I don't think they had enough people to staff it and dropped the project. Kinda a shame.
>>9118490
...He does?
>>9118513
>kiddo
>hardcore Trainer
Sorry but my team is not really cut out for the hardcore trainer zone. Shedinja, Ninjask and a Nincada are really only enough to keep little jerk kids out of my apartment complex.
>>9118539
Uh, Mauville. I was hoping I could do some fieldwork? Maybe get moved somewhere that isn't Hoenn?

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>>9118538
>Well, a Chespin is a cross between a chestnut and a hedgehog
>Probably a bunch of squeaking, assuming it didn't come out as something along the lines of "Ches, chespin ches-pinches"
>Chespin smiles brightly, following Rob.

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>>9118490
As do at least two of his Admins.
>>9118413
What's the name on the application? I can take a look at it, if you'd like.
>>9118539
Good afternoon, commander.
We've got no confirmed sightings on our high-lethality problem since he bugged out of Hearthome. Still, I've got high hopes he'll be brought down soon.

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>>9118538
>luca writes and shows to vennu
>"hello, who are you?
" are you friends with the man?"
>>9118565
>he stays to the chespin the whole time

>>9118559
Hmm.... What are your qualifications, and which region would you prefer to be stationed in?
>>9118589
I see... Who do we currently have tracking him?

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>>9118673
(D R I N K)

>>9118589
Rodger, sir.
>>9118673
Uh, I can work in any, sir. I sort of took this job to see new things and because I've been in a funk.
I like to think I'm at least a decent battler, not a front liner or a champion destroyer but someone that could at least take down lesser threats? I'm also very good with bug pokemon.
And my, uh... I'll get back to you in a second, Shedinja got himself under my bed again.

>>9118565
>I think the squeaking is cuter, so lets go with that
>adoption forms are all filled out, rob's trainer's license has been checked and the chespin and luca have been registered in his name
>rob turns around to the two pokemon, smiling
alright, you guys are with me and venny now, I have a present for you both
>rob reaches around and opens his bag, which has a little logo with a pokeball with a star on it
>rob reaches inside and brings out two pokeballs
>each of you roll for your favorite looking pokeball, as long as it's not something dumb like a master ball
>venny flutters up and lands on rob's shoulder, nodding at luca

>>9118826
(meant to also reply to >>9118637, sorry)

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>>9118750
Understood, Rodger.
I'm thinking that we have several open positions that would work, ranging from intelligence and recon to Pokemon rehabilitation and safehouse operation.
>>9118673
We've got Dave on his ass, mostly because if anyone can wipe this guy off the map it's him.

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>>9118826
>luca smiles and goes to the ball
>roll for a great ball

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>>9118826
>Thinking about it, a Nest Ball would almost certainly be the balltist's choice for a non-shiny chespin because color matching, so rolling for that
>Chespin presses a paw against the button of the ball offered, to go inside. Three shakes and a click.

Hey, /par/.
Anyone know where a Sinnohfag could get a Surf HM on short notice?
I've got cash, I just need to teach one of my squad members Surf.

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>>9118750
Hmm...You could assist in recovering abused Pokemon and rehabilitation.
>>9118864
Ah. Yes, Dave certainly would be capable of it.
>>9118966
You... Do realize that the move Surf is not necessary to ride an aquatic Pokemon, correct?

>>9118914
>nice

>>9118939
>looks like all rob had left was a regular pokeball for chespin, oh well

>rob lets both pokemon back out of their balls and downloads the latest version of the poketalk translator app onto his pokedex
alright, I hope you like your pokeballs, I wish I could've brought some nicer ones from the shop for you but it seems I forgot
just so you know you're both allowed to stay out of your pokeballs unless we go somewhere that requires you all to be inside, like venny here
so now what, do you two want to go explore the rest of kalos together?

>>9119095
Well, shit. Looks like I just gotta head south until I reach the coast, then!
Greninja's a good enough swimmer to handle open ocean, right?

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>>9118864
Dave has Necrozma as well, I haven't tested how far does it teleport goes but it seems to be far ranged enough for Dave to call in reinforcements.
And I'm real fired up to get that scumbag caught.

>>9118750
Any region in particular?

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>>9119127
All right, sounds good to me!
>Chespin smiles brightly up to Rob. The pokeball he'd gotten didn't turn out to be any different to the one he was used to, so he wasn't complaining anytime soon.

>At this point he seems mostly healed. Burn heal is a godsend.

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>>9119131
Not for extended periods of time, no. Particularly not when carrying a trainer. I would suggest ... renting... a Pokemon for the trip.

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>>9118864
I can do pokemon rehab or a safehouse, sir.
>>9119095
That works, thank you.
>>9119196
No preference, really. Anything but Hoenn would be fine, this place has had me not feeling great.

>Rodger packs up a few of his things between answering messages.
>The ruby red uniform with the large "M" plastered on the chest is one of the last things in his closet.
>He stares at it for a few moments...

>>9118966
YOU CAN RUN BUT YOU CAN'T HIDE BOI

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>>9119127
>luca nods and smiles
>and luca follows rob

Why isn't anyone who posts in here able to pick up speech patterns I swear to goy you've all got the tainted humors.

>>9119336
Except this guy. Good job.

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>>9119358
If you entertain them it's easy to figure out where they plan on heading next. Outing them simply makes them stop posting and continue what they were doing in silence.

>>9119405
As if he could be silent for any amount of time.
You could have just told him the frog would be fine, and he'd have met with either a gang of Sharpedos or the frog would have given out along the way.
Would have solved your little problem without much of any effort at all.

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>>9119506
You seem to be under the impression that I would find putting his Pokemon in harm's way to be acceptable. It's not. The goal is to save Pokemon from him, including his own Pokemon.

>>9119566
...You've got me there, I'll admit. I don't suppose pokeballs float, eh?

>>9119285
>>9119354
(really sorry, I need to leave for today, I'm gonna have rob just go back to his hotel room, you guys can still do stuff on your own if you want though)
>rob's phone starts vibrating in his pocket
>it's a call from his boss, something something urgent, something something do it now
well, I guess that ruins that plan for now, sorry guys I need to go do some things back in my hotel room
you guys can walk around and stuff if you want still
>rob walks them both back to his hotel room so they know where it is
if you're going to go out on your own that's fine, as long as you're careful and come back here when you're done, alright?

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>>9117604
Less actual battling and more knowledge and care of your team. The late Viridian gym leader had the right idea.

>>9119599
Only the apricorn balls float.

>>9119316
There's a safehouse position in Kanto unfulfilled as of a while ago, interested?

>>9119656
Speaking of Viridian... who the fuck runs that now? Is it Blue again?

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>>9119684
Youngster Joey, I believe.
>>9119599
Not modern Pokeballs, no.

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>>9119646
(It's okay)
>Luca nods hugs rob as he goes away
>he tries to talk again even of no words come out

>>9119656
That sounds good. Am I paying for travel expenses myself?
And.. Uh... Where would it be? Would there be any high priority people there?

>Even.
>Rodger sighs a bit before cutting the old uniform up and discarding it into the trash.
>He sits on the edge of his bed as he waits for replies.

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>>9119684
>>9119753
Youngster Joey and Olden Manus. Apparently there's a game of telephone involved.

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>>9119803
We can pay for the travel expenses. Last I recalled the safehouse was located in Viridian city. I do not believe there are any high priority people there, unless you count the elite four, seeing as the entrance is in Viridian city.

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>>9117604
Like Halloween. But with more alcohol. And pumpkaboo. Pumpkaboo everywhere. All the pumpkaboo.

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>>9119646
>Chespin nods, giving Rob a salute.
>>9119767
>Chespin blinks softly... Luca brought the notepad and pencil, right?
...So uh... mind if I ask why you can't talk? ...I mean, you obviously aren't mute by choice or by birth, since you keep trying to talk...

...If you don't wanna say, that's fine.

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>>9119940
>he nevers goes out with out them
>"got attacked when really young"
>he lifts up his neck showing a big scar
>"i almost died, it hurt alot, sometimes it still hurts a little"

>>9119851
Really appreciated. I packed all my things up.
Is catching a boat from Slateport alright?

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>>9120040
Oh. ...That's horrible, I'm so sorry...
>Chespin pulls the kip into a comforting hug.

>>9117705
(ayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy)

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>>9120083
>"it's okay, i got to meet you"

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>>9120062
That should be fine. Whichever method of transport works best for you.

PAR IS DYING
>roll to kill self

>>9120418
but
it isn't though

>>9120418
it's just tuesday

>>9120234
>The nut doesn't have much of a reply other than more hugs.
>...Well, this turned into a bit of a sugar bowl. Not that I'm complaining.

>>9120418
(It's just ded hours m8)

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>>9120502
>DRINK

>>9120376
Alright. I'll get down to Slateport. I'll post when I'm in Kanto.
Am I going to be staying at this safehouse?

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>>9120418
Someone say dying?

>>9120418
Do it already then

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>>9120582
i am not dead

>>9120582
i wish i were dying

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>>9120638
Yes you are. Sorry to be the one to tell you buddy. Bug/Ghost.

Did you not notice that you have a hole in your back? And are a pile of dead skin?

>>9120684
Everyone is dying all the time. Every time you breath you oxidize your body a bit more. Drink a lot. Trust me, it makes everything better,

>>9120746
when i drink i end up hurting people

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>>9120746
if im dead
how am i talking to you??

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>>9120746
>A burnt and wounded kartana portals in
>Weakly sets a origami crane on the floor

>>9120502
>>9120511
>he smiles and tears up a little
>a shaky light wheeze and an attempt of talking
-luca

Hello,
I am back again,
I still have yet to confront the two on my feelings...

What is the best way to do this,
Should I tell them outright,
Or bring a gift?

-Anonymous

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>>9120759
Try weed. Get some of that Ransei gold. The real stuff, not the fake mass produced stuff they grow in Unova

>>9120785
It's kind of my gimmick.

>>9120791
Ooooh fuck me running, nope, you're ass isn't passing on just yet buddy.

>slam that mf potion
>heal a paper

>>9120759
i hurt others without meaning to
also cut down on the drinking if you are so worried about that

>>9120531
Preferably, yes. However, you could possibly live nearby.
>>9120823
Some may view the gift as a way of pressuring them into saying yes. I would suggest perhaps inviting them somewhere... Perhaps to a place such as a park? A picnic may serve well for something such as that.

>>9120823
People tend to like things, so, give them some things.

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>>9120850
>Paper unburns
>Happy paper noises
>Scatter paper cranes everywhere

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>>9120871
(FUCK YOU 4CHAN ENTER WAS SUPPOSED TO BE FOR ANOTHER LINE, NOT TO SEND. )
(DRINK)
>>9120867
>>9120759
Maybe you two could find ways to moderate yourselves. I can not offer suggestions, since I don't know you, but that would be myadvice.

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>>9120785
The shell expired but the self endured, a new shell.

>>9120871
>>9120874
I see,
Thank you,
I will hold off on the papercraft.

-Anonymous

>>9120894
(how the heckie does that even happen did you already fill the captcha or do you have a pass or something)

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>>9120850
whats a gimmick??
>>9120898
im the shell??
>Take the Dex.
>Pat the bug.
>>9120871
Yeah, I can live in there. Thank you.
I'm on the boat now, probably going to get some Zs and let Shed shitpost a bit.

>>9120894
(Calm down skitts)

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>>9120960
(I had filled out the captcha with the intent of sending it and then another post caught my eye, so I had intended to respond to that one as well.)
>>9121031
(m8 I'm fine. Ain't even angry. Slightly irritated? Yes. Angry? No. )
>>9120965
Sleep well. I do hope your Shedinja enjoys posting here.
>>9120915
Hmm... We know basic information about your crushes, is there anything more you can offer to allow us to improve our advice?

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>>9120965
My observations have led my self to your self particular case.
The self comes before the shell.

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>>9121057
hello cabbage!!!
>>9121059
...
ok
i see

>>9121057
Ah, the first is rather tall?
The second... Tall as well, rather large, enjoys eating.
Perhaps... A picnic in a park?

-Anonymous

420

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>>9121095
Alas, I have been confounded. It was not you the one who lost the shell but endured, but your companion.
My apologies.

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>>9121095
I prefer to think of myself as a salad, personally. How are you, Shedinja?
>>9121183
I see. Yes, a picnic in the park sounds like it would be ideal given the two individuals you have described. Perhaps a more casual type of food? I have heard the standard picnic involves watermelon and sandwiches.

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>>9121252
oh him? he doesnt talk much
sorry
>>9121436
im okay
my trainer used to not talk a lot and always sleep a lot but i think you fixed him
so thank you mr salad!!!
none of the stfuf i tried worked so youre better than me at the fixing humans thing

Hoo boy do I have a story to tell you guys.
So I finally decide to enter civilization again after... fuck it's been five years since I had my cabin built. Anyways, finally hit town, everyone's giving me weird looks for no reason, and then the police try to arrest me! I asked them why and they said pokemon cruelty! I got out of it, but what's going on?

>>9121668
wat
more details required.

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>>9121668
... are you wearing Pokemon furs?
>>9121499
Ah. Well, that may be because I am a human. If you need more advice do not be afraid to contact me.

>>9121681
Alright, yeah, I should probably clarify.
They didn't like my coat. Five years ago everyone was fine with me having a coat.
I just wanted to get this new pokedex thing I heard you guys talking about, god damnit.

>>9121688
Yes? I don't see the issue here, they attacked me and we fought back, I wasn't going to let it go to waste!

>>9121702
pokemon rights right?
now we cant have furs and anything fun
next theyre going to want to fucking vote

>>9121702
well that's weird. no idea why they'd attack you for wearing a fur coat.

>>9121717
No no you misunderstand, I fully agree that living pokemon should have rights... but it's a fucking dead body, from a pokemon that attacked me on sight, dead bodies don't have rights. Ghosts get new sorta-living bodies, so they also get rights, even if I think they're creepy.

>>9121726
...The police didn't attack me, the pokemon that I made this coat out of attacked me.

>>9121717
>next theyre going to want to fucking vote
Good god can you imagine that? That's a fucking ton of new people we have to register...
Would we give pokemon the same punishments as humans or...? Knowing how entitled they are they'd tell us that they don't deserve any punishments.
How would we punish all the scummy legendaries that kill anyone they want?

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>>9121717
There are still non Pokemon animals from which you can obtain fur. This is also a cheaper source. I would highly suggest you there for your clothing.
>>9121726
The issue is that it's a Pokemon fur coat.
>>9121702
The killing and skinning of Pokemon is considered illegal - the former can only be waved off in a case of self defense, and the latter is... Disgusting, and only waved off if you have a license. Not that license mitigates the disgust factor.
>>9121753
And that would be why. You are wearing the skin of their brethren. They consider it both disrespectful and a threat. To them it registers as you showing off a kill and warning any others of their kind against you.

>>9121726
..oh.
well yeah i suppose that makes a bit more sense.

>>9121804
what else are we going to get fur from? people?

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>>9121753
...which pokemon?

>>9121804
...I think I'm having clarification issues again.
No one attacked me today, the police tried to arrest me, that's it.
About six years ago, me and Allie were walking along and a Mightyena attacked us, we killed it in self defense, and I decided not to let the body go to waste, Allie seemed fine with it then, and she's still fine with it now.

>>9121816
>>9121804
i seem to have misplaced my eyes, sorry.
the question still stands though, what animals are you talking about?

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>>9121874
The more popular ones for fur coats are foxes and rabbits. They are similar to Vulpixes and Buneary, respectively.
>>9121785
How tragic, a species physically superior to yours wishes to be on equal ground. Can you imagine how tragic it would be if there were suddenly more individuals from which your countries could draw taxes?
>>9121862
Ah. I see. I still find the wearing of Pokemon skins to be disgusting but... The police are obliged to investigate on probably cause when they see things such as that.

>ray reveals hes deletman yet again

>>9121981
Honestly I don't think pokemon care what happens to their bodies, they're either in the distortion world or they're ghosts and have new bodies, what does it matter if someone uses what they left behind to protect themselves?

>>9117604
No losers or Plasma wannabes allowed, that's what it would be like!

>Shitty Trainer stumbles south, towards civilization.
>He lets out his Greninja and his Salamence.
Look. We've got fuckers coming who will make the Daycare look like a goddamn vacation for all of us.
I need out of this shit Region. Can either of you do it?

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>>9117604
probably fugging
music themed or some shit
turn tables or whatever
>>9122098
so
no challengers whatsoever
great gym dude
>Dave heads out for Twinleaf Town
>Rolling for how long it takes him to get there

>>9121981
>physically superior to yours
Is that why I can stomp a Zigzagoon to death?

>>9122015
Anon can you please control your insane homolust for ray?

>>9121981
You need a source of income to pay taxes.
That's millions of new jobs that pokemon would need to get, right?

>>9122015
>Ray states the obvious
>You state the obvious
(In other news, I'm gay.)

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>>9120891
I hope to hell that's not how paper... never mind, not even gonna think about it.
>pet paper

>>9120965
A gimmick? It's what my entire existence is.

>>9122183
Came out of lurking to post this.

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>>9122072
Ey, dude. I'm, uh, kind of a former shitbag who turned informant and mole, so I can kinda tell you what people assume.
Most people see a Pokemon-fur coat, they're not jumping to the conclusion that it's a case like yours. They're assuming you're more like my, uh, ex-cartel-boss' clients.
Those people didn't do stuff so things wouldn't go to waste, they did it so they could show off just how above the law they were to their other depraved rich friends.
I'll be honest: I did, and enabled, some fucked up shit. The usual person who wears those coats, they're still in that place. That's why people freak out.

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>>9122098
>Salamence turns away from deletman and begins vomiting the moment he's let out of the ball

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>>9122223
>Almost quints
>I'm just going to give this to you
>Very good pets
>Happy paper
>Give her a paper origami hat

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>>9122098
>Greninja is shivering from the cold

>>9122274
Fair enough.
...I probably shouldn't let anyone come near my house then, I kept getting attacked while Allie and I were walking around our property so I uh... kinda built a collection.
...I should probably get rid of this stuff if I don't want the I.P to throw me in the slammer for using what idiots left behind, but like, all of it's USEFUL, I'm pretty sure dark type fur protects me from psychic attacks, I've made tools from bones, blankets... a lot of stuff.
Jeez, looking around, I probably look like one of those assholes that actually hunts pokemon.

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>>9122366
>dubs for paper hat
>it's a hq hat
Nice. Thanks little paper dude.

>>9122341
Alright, get it outta your system. We're gonna have to move.
>>9122369
Same for you, we stall here too long and we're fucked. And not the good kind of fucked, either, the knives and needles kind.

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>>9122466
>Greninja keeps shivering
>He tries to get to the water
>Rolling

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>>9122446
>Bows respectfully
>Looks around the wagon curiously

>>9122594
sniffers you arent allowed to have UBs

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>>9122466
>Salamance finishes heaving and starts beating his wings, panting with each wing beat
>Rolling to see if he's expelled enough to fly

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>Look for Guzzlord's ball.

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>>9122403
I know somebody I might be able to ask on the down-low about this. I.P. probably won't be the ones dropping the hammer if that shit happens, though.
They worry about things like inter-Regional smuggling rings, or psychoes that are too tough for local cops to stop.
>>9121981
Uh, boss? Can we, like, not go full door-kick on this guy? Maybe just talk things over with him?

>>9122540
>>9122670
>Both evens.
(Yeah this is what I mean. Deletman is going to be safe from anyone.)

>>9122628
(Hb you aren't allowed to be such a faggot.)

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>>9122594
>it's full of junk, trashy light novels, weird occult stuff, a few battered grimouirs with odd markings, and empty bottles
>there might be more piled under the heaps of dirty clothes and ecchi
Uh... can I help you with something else bud?

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>>9122722
...
>Shrugs
>Drop a origami charizard, then portal out, waving goodbye

>>9122540
What's wrong, I thought you liked water?
Anyway, we gotta go, this League bigshot's probably bringing an entourage, death of a thousand cuts style.
>>9122670
You airborne? You seriously need to be airborne here soon. These guys are coming to kill all of us.

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>Leave Hilbert's apartment because oops I think I did a bad.

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>>9122174
>He's here.
>Roll to see if anyone in Twinleaf has seen deletman

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>>9122671
>>9122827
>You didn't find Guzz's ball
>Hilbert also didn't really pay too close of attention to you, because he has a Kartana that wanders around the apartment as well
>Keep looking for Guzz's ball?

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>>9122770
>As he approaches the cold war, he shivers more
>Weak Greninja sounds

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>>9122765
>put paper charizard on the shelf
When did I get so popular...?

>Sniffs has too many chars
>keeps picking up more

>>9122896
ok

>>9122896
>GMs and people like him do that to keep thread alive
>Oh wait you don't care do you hateboner?

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>>9122887
"Don't bother."
>Salamence grabs Greninja and tosses him onto his back
>>9122770
>He huffs at deletman and stands up taller, making getting on his back as much of a challenge as possible

>>9122896
Jezz anon
Is sniffs all you think about?
Are you in love or something?

(Stop replying to the shitposters. They get more (You)s than actual RPers)

>>9122962
(He likes Ray as well remember? )

>>9122887
>He looks at his map. "Twinleaf"
Suck it up. You think the League rep's gonna show mercy?
>>9122938
>Deleteman scowls, and fails to clamber up the first time.
Having fun there?
>He gets up eventually, but he needs to roll for Complications cause by the stalling - evens are good for him, odds good for anyone pusruing.

>>9122983
(Nice, we got another poly going)

>>9122983
>>9123009
(STOP)

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>>9122829
>Apparently people in Twinleaf are blind
>Dave pulls out his map and heads south
>Rolling to pick up a trail

>>9122980
>Not knowing that by doing this they might give a hint or slip on who they really are
>But ok I'll stop

>>9123022
(Hey turts)

>>9123023
>Since OOC bullshit stole the dubs I'll give it to you.
>You've got eyes on him, just getting onto his Salamence now.

>>9123027
(Fuck off.)
>>9123045
(I fucking hate this shit, nevermind I'll just let the thread go to shit. Fucking maybe I'll drop all my characters too lol ecksdee)

>>9122691
That'd be greaaaat.
>Man and Bun: look around house and realize that if literally anyone walks in on what they've created they're liable to get FUCKED

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>>9122938
"Thanks... I can barely feel my legs"

>>9122992
>Tries to not make eye contact

>>9123062
(K)

>Applies Draino to thread and plunges vigorously in an attempt to get this dumb shit out of here

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>>9123062
(I hate it too desu, it's getting cluttered)
>>9123048
hey shitbag
guess who
>Dave sends out Blaziken!
>Blaziken Mega Evolved!
>Mega Blaziken used Swords Dance!

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>>9122861
>Yes.
>Keep looking.

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>>9123113
>Salamence backs up until his tail touches water
>>9122992
>Roll to get airborne
>>9123068
"Try to stay back. I don't want to have to dispose of you too."

>>9123181
no one that actually contributes
no worries

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>>9123113
GAAAH!
>Deletman freaks out.
>>9123212
Get us out of here, NOW!

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>slither slither
>sneaky seaweed sounds

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>>9123181
>No dice, the ball is evading you
>Rolling to see if Hilbert notices Kartana is acting off

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>>9123312
...
>Sweat.
>Make him a paper crane.

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>>9123277
>The tone isn't appreciated
>Salamence turns and glares at Deletman, hissing and flaring his facial fins

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>>9123212
>Holding tight

>>9123113
"Is this how it ends?"

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>>9123277
>>9123391
>>9123395
rip man
maybe dont treat your mons like shit
blaziken?
>Stone Edge on the Salamence
+2 252+ Atk Blaziken-Mega Stone Edge vs. 44 HP / 0 Def Salamence: 1106-1302 (529.1 - 622.9%) -- guaranteed OHKO

>>9123435
Fs out

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>>9123360
>The paper crane earns him a puzzled look, but he accepts it and sets it on his desk
Kartana? Are you looking for something...?

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>>9123435
>Startled
>Falls off Salamence, into the water
>The water is cold

>>9123435
>Deletman rages out.
Fuck you! I thought you were cool once!

Salamence, Dragon Dance!

>>9123537
Goddammit! Get back here!

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>>9123477
...
>Shake head.
>Attempt to make a paper version of Guzzlord.
>Rolling for craftmanship.

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>>9123435
>Stone Edge is dodged, but just barely
>>9123563
>Salamence growls and snaps at deletman
>He can't use moves with someone on his back
>>9123537
"Hey! Can you handle the Blaziken?"

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>>9123537
>>9123563
>>9123631
waaaah my idol isnt a murderous douche
>Blaziken goes for another Stone Edge on Salamence
+2 252+ Atk Blaziken-Mega Stone Edge vs. 44 HP / 0 Def Salamence: 1106-1302 (529.1 - 622.9%) -- guaranteed OHKO

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WHAT ARE WE
>>9123631
HEY FUCK YOU
>NECROZMA USES PRISMATIC LASER
4 SpA Necrozma Prismatic Laser vs. 0 HP / 4 SpD Salamence: 388-457 (177.9 - 209.6%) -- guaranteed OHKO

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>>9123563
>Angry glare in the general direction of Deletman

>>9123631
"Yes..."
>Greninja tries to hit Blaziken with Hydro Pump

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>>9123661
>Deleteman slides off of Salamance, less than gracefully.
What the fuck?
>>9123676
>He stares in utter disbelief.
What the FUCK...

>Deleteman sends out Mawile!
Get mega-fucked!
>He tries to use Mega -evolution - but it fails!
What the-!?

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>>9123573
>Odds
Uh... What's that?
>Roll to see if Hilbert can recognize Guzzlord in this

>>9123676
>Salamence: meet laser
>Also Salamence: get k the fuck o'd
>not eating images for this

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>>9123734
...?
>Point at it.

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>>9123696
>hit
252 SpA Life Orb Greninja Hydro Pump vs. 0 HP / 0 SpD Blaziken-Mega: 179-213 (59.4 - 70.7%) -- guaranteed 2HKO

shit
fuckign
frogs
blaziken?
>High Jump Kick
+2 252+ Atk Blaziken-Mega High Jump Kick vs. 0 HP / 0 Def Greninja: 1233-1452 (704.5 - 829.7%) -- guaranteed OHKO
>>9123676
oh hey
sup nec
>hey gladi
>how does one tell if theyve cracked a rib
>>9123713
rip
no mega for you
remember what i said about treating your pokemon like shit?
but yeah uh
say hi to necrozma
hes the best crystal gem

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>is throwin rocks around

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>>9123713
SORRY WHAT?
>NECROZMA USES PRISMATIC LASER
4 SpA Necrozma Prismatic Laser vs. 0 HP / 0 SpD Mawile: 260-306 (162.5 - 191.2%) -- guaranteed OHKO
>>9123818
HEY
I SORT OF HAVE A PLAN SO LIKE
ROLL WITH ME
>fuckin
>dictors man
>that was a typo of doctors but im keeping it

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>>9123818
>Salamence: down.
>Mawile: down
>Greninja: down.
>Deleteman throws out his last two Pokemon!
Gengar! Conkledurr! Drop these cucks!

>He pulls at something tucked in his backpack, fumbling with an injured arm...

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>>9123818
>Greninja stares in disbelief
>His friend has been knocked out, and his strongest move didn't stop the opponent
"Why.."
>And then the kick connects
>Greninja is thrown downwards into the water with a sickening sound
>"It's finally over..." thought before passing out

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>>9123838
>Frankie and Vapey walk by. Frankie's all greasy and Vapey's looking like she needs a little break too.
Heya, Zorro. What's up?
Sorry I haven't been around as much as I should be.

>Vapey giggles
We were working on plumbing
Its looking good
Real good

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>>9123676
>>9123862
>Watching
>Message to Necrozma: "Fuck him up"

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>>9123818
>>9123892
>watch silently

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>>9123937
what do we need plumbing for though!?

>excited to see frankie

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>>9123862
aight dude
whats your plan
>well shit
>its probs just a bruise anyway
>fuckin
>rip
>howve you been dude
>>9123892
ok but
how can i be a cuck if im a bachelor dude
ya dumb shit
blaziken
kick the shit out of the conkeldonk
>HJK the fucker
+2 252+ Atk Blaziken-Mega High Jump Kick vs. 252 HP / 0 Def Conkeldurr: 936-1102 (371.4 - 437.3%) -- guaranteed OHKO

>>9124066
>crit on the conkeldonk
+2 252+ Atk Blaziken-Mega High Jump Kick vs. 252 HP / 0 Def Conkeldurr on a critical hit: 1404-1653 (557.1 - 655.9%) -- guaranteed OHKO

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>>9123787
Oh. Guzzlord? He should be... Hm. I guess he returned to his ball.
>Hilbert walks off into his room, comes back, and lets Guzzlord out

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>>9123892
>run: ok.exe
OK
>PRISMATIC LASER ON THE GHOST
4 SpA Necrozma Prismatic Laser vs. 0 HP / 4 SpD Gengar: 798-942 (456 - 538.2%) -- guaranteed OHKO
>>9123943
LEND ME YOUR POWER SB
>>9124066
IF I SAY IT
HELL KNOW
>hope it feels better man
>did you hit yourself on something orrr?

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>>9124102
>Bow.
>Wave to Guzzlord.
How are you?
Well, I hope,
I have wanted to ask you something.

>>9124066
>>9124084
>Deleteman panics.

>>9124109
>[Splash Dama KO]
> He panics hard.

G-Get back! Back!
>He draws out a very large knife, still stained with dried blood.
I'll do it!

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>>9124109
You have my permission to teleport him to a nest of hungry Skorupi or another weak and hungry pokemon of your choice.
Well not really, but I wish I could give him an ironic punishment
>Message N, John, Colress, Ray
>Message everyone to see justice being delivered

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>>9124045
So
Um
We can take baths and have drinking water and stuff?
We still can use the firepits for fun though don't worry

>Frankie chuckles.
>Pat the phox.
Ah, Zorro. I love you, you know that?

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>>9124109
dude
dude
youre a fucking psychic type
p sure you can do telepathy shit
>nah i didnt get hit or anything
>parents dont do physical abuse
>just nonstop manipulation
>i fucking wore a binder for 72 hours straight like a dumb ass
>>9124178
do what
fucking cut yourself?
do i need to go fucking get gladions three days grace albums

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>>9124196
OH I HAVE SOME IDEAS
>>9124260
SHH
>fug
>WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT
>HOLY SHIT DUDE
>plz
>be careful
>>9124178
WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO
>NECROZMA: SEIZE HIS ARM
CUT ME
I DARE YOU

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>>9124260
FUCK YOU!
>>9124320
>Arm: Grabbed.
FUCK!
>He tries to toss the knife into his other hand, and throw it! (Failure except on 8 or 0.)

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>>9124367
>Knife wizzes by Dave's ear
holy shit
>>9124320
uh aight dude
you gonna fucking
whats going on here
>because fucking
>three shitty days in a row consisting of my parents be especially cunty in their insistence on calling me a little girl
>ill try man
>im kinda clumsy as fuck most days but like
>ill try dude

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>>9124485
GRAB HIS OTHER ARM
>fuckin hell man
>im sorry
>just be careful dude
>>9124367
NICE TRY
>BEND HIS ARM BACKWARDS
SO TELL ME
WHAT WERE YOU TRYING TO ACCOMPLISH
ID READ YOUR MIND
but this is more

fun

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>>9124565
alllright
other arm is get
>Grab the other arm
>alright man
>carefulness: hopefully happen
>guess ill just like
>stop wearing socks
>cause hardwood floor + cement walls
>anyway uh
>hows it going

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>>9124157
sup my fuckin karbro, hows it fuckin going? whats my up and bitchin paper origami friend got to ask from me?

>>9124565
I... FUUUCK!
I was... securing the existence of good Pokemon... AAAH! And a future for competitive battlers!
Everybody joked about it! I was just the one with the balls to do something!
>Screaming intensifies, eventually turning into delirious laughter.
You gonna kill me, Dave? Huh?

>>9124612
>Deleteman looks over, a crazed glint in his bloodshot eyes.
What you you gonna do, huh?

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>>9124612
THANK YOU
>yes im just gonna bubblewrap you man
>you got me
>its been okay
>not great desu
>>9124662
YEAH YEAH YEAH
I GOT SOMETHING BETTER
>TWIST HIS ARM UNTIL IT BREAKS
>NECROZMA: TELEPORT THE PSYCHOPATH+DAVE INTO THE RADIO STATION

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>>9124662
>>9124682
uh nope
not gonna kill you
not yet at least
i wanna see what necs gonna do
>>9124715
mmhmmm
so what we just
drop him off for seb to torture
>but babe
>i cant give the wicked cuddles when covered in bubble wrap
>aw man
>watcha been up to

>>9124715
>>9124776
>Incoherent Screaming: happen.
>His arm snaps like a twig.
>This is more pain than Deleteman has ever experienced in his short and privileged life.

>>9124776
>not hugging each other and then wrapping you both up in bubble wrap

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>Seb: ready and with his full team at the ready
>Even the little Agger

>>9124715
>>9124776
Well, hello!

>>9124804
Let me put it bluntly, kid: you're fucked.

(I don't know what's scarier. Finding out who Hateboner really is)
(Or never finding out)

>>9124859
>He tries to spit a threat through his clenched jaw.
>On a dubsfail he bites his tongue instead.

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>>9124776
MAYBE
YES
JUST GOING TO MAKE SURE NOTHING BAD HAPPENS
>babe
>bubble wrap suit
>nothing much desu
>college and shit
>>9124804
DOES IT HURT?
>NECROZMA: BOUNCE HIS HEAD OFF ONE OF THE DESKS AND DROP HIM ON THE FLOOR
>>9124859
GO WILD
ID SAY MAKE A SNUFF VIDEO BUT
WHAT ABOUT A STREAM

>>9124889
>Welp, that's a concussion.
Fuck...
Gon' killme?
...Splatalola?
My daaaaaad's with Devooooon....
>He's fucking incoherent at this point.

>>9124880
are we alone in the universe?
or is there life out there?
both are equally scary
-Arthur C. Clark

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>>9124882
Shut the fuck up while adults are talking
>Punch him in the face

>>9124889
As much as I would like tying him in the middle of Orre for the desert 'mons to feed upon and for the world to watch, have to follow the law, you know.
Removal of trainer identification, barred from life for ever owning a pokemon or even working with, a long time in jail and hopefully forced labour for the benefit of pokemon in need.
And we have a lot of evidence with all the videos this dumbshit himself recorded.

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>>9124845
>anon thats how either i suffocate on gladi chest or gladi suffocates on hair
>>9124804
jfc dude
no one likes a screamer
shut the fuck up
>>9124882
>>9124968
the fuck did i just say
>place a foot on his head
>>9124859
sup seb
whats the plan
>>9124889
you say as you make "bad" things happen to him
silly nec
>Poke the rock
>but
>what if i just
>do the burrito thing with a blanket
>just carry me around man probs pretty easy
>id ask about that but fucking
>i know jack shit about college

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>>9124999
>trips fail
>dave apparently cant balance on one foot worth shit
>he falls over and lands on delet man
fuck

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>>9124993
Good call.
He won't last very long in jail, rich kids generally don't.
I wonder if he's even realized that Daddy Dearest's cash won't get him out of this one?
Drop him with the cops it is, then?

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>>9124968
HAHA
>>9124993
ALRIGHT YOU SHOULD PROBABLY TAKE HIM THERE?
GIANT UB GEM ROCK MIGHT FREAK OUT THE GRAPE LADY
>>9124999
>>9125020
>PULL DAVE AWAY
PLEASE
>blanket burrito works dude
>college sucks thats all that really matters
>>9125029
COPS YES

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>>9125029
I don't think he has yet, let me break the news.

>>9124968
Hey, check this thing out: your dad was fired from Devon over a month ago.
Good luck hiring a lawyer with no money.

>>9125029
Cops indeed. Let me get the evidence ready.

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>roll to scream

>>9125065
>>9125044
>>9124999
>Deleteman passes out - possibly from being beat down hard, possibly from the shock of learning that he's actually going to prison and can't throw money at the problem to make it go away.

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>>9125044
>Dave: absolutely do not shriek like a little girl when you put weight on that sprained ankle
SON OF A FUCKING
GOD DAMNED MOTHER FUCKING PIECE OF FUCKING STUPID ASS MOTHER FUCKING FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
>somehow id still get hurt even in a fuckign blanket burrito
>choke to death on my own hair or something
>rip skitters
>died because he was too fabulous

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>>9125065
>>9125044
>>9125172
Ah, the struggles of trying to be a legitimate organization. Can't just make people walk the plank anymore.
>>9125187
You need a hand? A chair? A stiff drink?

>>9125187
>implying you won't die of imploding on your own gayness
>aka the best way

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That's just how the calcite crumbles.

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>>9125172
Pathetic.

>>9125228
Cops are incoming. Also messaged N, just in case.

>>9125044
That means you might want to hide. Or not, not like they don't remember that bar trip.

>>9125187
And guess I should have called an ambulance as well.

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>>9125253
Dude, niiiiice.

>>9125187
>touch butt

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>>9125253
>[Italian Laughing]

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>>9125331
Sorry I would have used my one about broken bones but I'd be pullin' yer arm.

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>>9125228
sure dude
bring out the booze
>>9125232
>what does that even imply
>what does imploding on gayness even mean
>>9125320
>hiss
im fine
hospitals are the devil
>>9125350
hey
no empty promises dude