ITT: Pokemon are real. Who is the biggest shithead? Info:

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>>7884674
Me

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>>7884610
Don't you mean message?
And they will get that when they found out their buddies are defeated, dead and their business ruined.
There is no need to prolong their suffering, there is no need for it, and its an awful thing to do.
>Lays around Zorro

>>7884674
...

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>>7884677
>Dubsfail for intimidating glare
>Dave accidentally the bedroom eyes

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>>7884635
...
>tell the goobab to spin him around
>in a mute way
>>7884677
>nice
>ill get a sledge sometime then bruh
>shrug
>>7884750
...

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>>7884674
Is that even a question? It's me

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>>7884610
We all have to die someday.
>>7884696
You know for being made of metal you sure are warm, why is that?

>>7884674
My boss.
I'm finally up to hit my mark, making sure my team's up for it.
I'm bringing a shock rod and a tranq dartgun to the party, too. Illegal as fuck, but that's business for you.

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>>7884760
>he can read minds so he can understand what he is thinking
>grins
dave you better get ready,
LET IT RIP
>dave starts spinning

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>>7884542
>this is nice
>Sandslash is lying on the ground with Yanmega on top of him
>Sandslash relaxes, still hugging the bug
>happy Sandslash noises

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>>7884696
Why is it awful? they want to harm us...

>>7884788
I do not. I will not.

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I come again,

bearing gifts.

Three wishes.

Go.

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>>7884760
what
dude thats no
>>7884802
>GIRLY SHRIEK
>Grab the nearest thing
>Evens Jacket
>Odds Goobabby

>>7884837
I wish for everyone in this thread to be happy.

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>>7884820
Death catches up to even the greatest of heroes, Zorro.

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>>7884837
I wish to own Dragontits tits

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>>7884802
>>7884851
>oh boy
>watch this mess
>>7884837
>...

>>7884837
i wish for the humans to be pokemon for a while

>>7884837
I wish that the requirements for having a child for any sentient being be to have sex AND desire to have a child together

>>7884815
>whispers of the wind attempt to tickle the nethers of the shrew
>'lets get this party started'

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>>7884788
I eat metal.
That metal needs refining to fill up any nicks and scrapes.
I'd imagine I have something that does all that inside of me.
I do not mind you rubbing against me.
It tickles.
>>7884820
There's a diffirence between killing someone fast so you can defend yourself or eat.
And torturing them and playing with their intestines while their still alive.
Don't go do the latter, it only makes you as twisted as the ones you disapprove off.
>>7884837
I wish that I have something with Zorro's scent so I have something of him around when he's not with me.

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>>7884837
A specific Ninetales.
This Ninetales: >>7884820

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>>7884815
>Happy dragonfly noises
>Cuddle Sandslash

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>>7884851
>>7884875
>get pulled and goo flies everywhere
don't pick me you idiot
>tries to stop spinning
>evens stops spinning
>odds spins faster

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>>7884750
Uhhh what's that look for?

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>>7884854
This is not possible.
>>7884864
... Why not?
>Poof.
>They might be attached to him.
>>7884877
>>7884879
I'm making humans pokemon for just an hour.
And yes that third one is granted.
>>7884893
>>7884897
Hm...
>They both get something with Zorro's scent on it.
How's that?

Yes I know I granted more than four. I will return later.

Goodbye.

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>>7884917
>SHRIEK LOUDER
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
>>7884875
>>7884932
>EVENS GLARE ODDS BEDROOM EYES
>>7884940
>DAVE IS NOW A BLAZIKEN
>BIRDLY SHRIEKING

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>>7884858
I do not believe that! I will fight death if i have to!
I do not want to die...

>>7884893
Sometimes to fight monsters you have to be a monster. That is what my parents always said....

>>7884897
huh? What could i do?

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>>7884962
Hahaha now there's two chicken chans!

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>>7884940
>A blanket that Zorro rolled around in extensively poofs on her head.
...
>Loud inhale.
Yessss.

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>>7884940
Wait before you go, can you make the plasma frigate pink? Like REALLY GAY PINK, and gay club and disco music is now added to the play list of song

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>>7884917
>mess
>>7884940
>WAIT WHAT
>fuck it lets make it fun and make him the poke equivalent of each mask when he changes it
>probably a zoroark but shh
>lycanroc time
>>7884962
>mess

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>>7884888
>>7884911
>Sandslash is getting aroused, both bug the cuddles from Yanmega and the fucking desert wind
>embarrassed squeaking noises
>Sandslash attempts to shift around to hide it

>>7884940
>hobo Is now a Garbodor
>at least he smells better now than he did before

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>>7884962
what what happened?
did spinning too fast make humans turn into pokemon?
i need to stop now
>evens stop spinning normally
>odds barfs on dave, passes out and stops spinning

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>About to kiss Archie.
>>7884940
>Suddenly a Camerupt.
>Oh god I can't see
what the fuck is happening

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>>7884980
>Am suddenly covered in Zorro blanket
Why did it just get dark and very musky smelling?

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>>7884972
>Quickly stows away the blanket.
Yes, sometimes.
Not all the time or right off the bat.
Just because you do it does not mean that you have to fully surrender to becoming a monster.
We can always work on ourselves for the better.
And I don't want to see you turning into a torturer, I don't know if I could bear to protect you from anyone trying to kill you for being a monster like that.

>>7885011
>whispers of the wind
>'There is no hiding that spine my friend'

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>>7885011
>dubsfail
>You can hear Stitches whisper thicc from somewhere.

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>>7884940
>I'm making humans pokemon for just an hour.
Wait what the...

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>>7884940
>is suddenly a fugging sharpedo

>>7885040
dude
mate
i'm a shark.
what the fuck is going on.

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>>7885076
>Panicked metal-on-metal noises that may resemble human speech
..FUCK

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>>7885011
>Good job hiding it
>You pressed it directly into Yanmega
>She goes from 0% embarrassment to 100% in an instant
>Freezes in place
...
>Slowly gets off
Um...I, uh...

>>7885011
>>7885102
These series of events please me greatly

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>>7885083
Fantastic. I wish I could see you to actually confirm this.
>Squint hard.
Why can't I see?

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>>7885011
>dubsfail
>turts uses his new found shitpost ghost powers (that fug u, imma do it)
>and sends him a VERY important

It'͟s̶ meant t̨o̧ hap̡p̸en͝

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>>7885076
Hey.
Can I come in? It's John.
Don't laugh.

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>>7885004
>>7884976
>ANGRY CHICKEN SOUNDS
>If the goop isn't stopping this ride Dave will
>Roll to Mega Evolve using his Blaziken's Mega Stone
>>7885039
>I guess it isn't necessary
>Still though, roll for mega chicken

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>>7885151
>goop is uncouncious on the floor with goo everywhere

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>>7884980
>>7885044
Hey how did that get out here?

>>7885057
Yeah.... The others tell me different though.
I am glad you believe that because I do agree. Hurting others is bad...
>looks around and whispers
do not trust them though.

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>>7885151
bork?
>...
>observe fail chicken

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>>7885141
SCHRRRRCHYES
SCCRRCHCANBARELYTALK

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>>7885141
Uhh.
John?
Your not John, your a pokemon.

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>>7885129
you don't have glasses anymore, nerd.
you seriously can't see at all without those, huh?

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>>7885151
>No Mega Chicken
>Guess self Mega Evolving isn't a thing
>Up the heat and evaporate that vomit
>>7885209
>Plop on the couch and hope you don't catch it on hire
>>7885224
... baaaawk.
>Pet the doggo

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>>7885255
>Faildubs
>He's too hot to handle bb
>Light the couch on fire
>And accidentally stab Jacket with a talon
BAAWWK??
>Panicked chicken sounds

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>>7885237
>Walks on in.
>Well, hell.
Looks like you're waiting this out, huh.
>>7885238
Ha ha, Smeargs. I still have the whoopin' stick.
Looks like Wishening Round Three.

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>>7885255
>COUCH IS ON FIRE OH GOD
>SCIZOR TIME
>PUNCH THE FIRE
>>7885280
>PAIN

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>>7885220
W-what got where?
>Hides the blanket with Sylveon bundled into it.
...
Yes, I am glad you feel that way.
But if you feel unease we could go to the cave?

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>>7885121
>Sandslash rolls over onto his belly
>Sandslash is staring at Yanmega, trying to think of something to say to avoid further embarrassment
...Um...What's wrong, Yanmega?

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>>7885281
Oh yeah?
What's Ray's favourite berry jam?
>>7885237
What the hell?
>Pokes the belldum.
Are you alright?

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>>7885248
>Grab glasses.
>Face is too big to put them on.
>Squint though a one of the lenses.
What the fuck?

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>>7885312
Sitrus, same as me.
Little guy put it on pancakes, in malasadas, even in booze.
Then again, so do I.
>Looks around
Seems like not everybody's adjusting so smoothly. Ray's on calm-people-down duty, since I'm not good at that.

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>>7885280
aaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH FIRE!

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>>7885280
>>7885286
>some of the goo that stuck on the celing dripped on top of the fire
>roll to stop the fire

>>7885213
Red-7 here, sir. Sorry for the slow reply.
Made contact with Cipher and I'm working on the deal. Uhhhh, everyone turned into pokemon so, very minor inconvenience.
Ein should be in contact with you soon, sir.

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>>7885289
Yeah i would like to check out that cave!

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>>7885320
i have no idea.
but i'm a sharpedo and that's really fucking cool.
>do the squirty thing at the nerd camel

>>7885355
>the goo is flamable

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>>7885344
...John?
It is you.
What happened?
...You sure have wide hips for a guy now.

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>>7885310
...
Uh...
>Flustered squeaking

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>>7885366
You're a Sh-
>KfuckingOed.

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>>7885355
>>7885373
>doesn't stop the fire
>it gets stronger
>there is a trail of good that goes in his direction

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>>7885281
SCHHHRHOPEFULLY

>>7885312
>Attempt to use these psychic abilities
>Owwww why is it everything so bright as of sudden
>Is this what it feels to be more aware of your surroundings
>Attempt telepathy on Smeargs
>"No I'm not alright"

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>>7885286
>Dave is the worst chicken here
>Are you sure being a 4x fire weakness bug and punching the fire is a good idea?
>Be a helpful birb and stone edge the couch
>>7885355
>THE GOO IS FLAMMABLE OH GOD

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>>7885361
Lets go then.
>Takes the blanket and Zorro with her.
>Sylveon might still be inside the blanket.
>Goes to the caves.

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>N is a Zekrom again
.... well. This was awkward enough the first time.
>Relocate to the floor because tfw too big for the couch

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>>7885413
Oh.
Could I do anything to help you out?

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>>7885428
This is a pretty comfortable cave!

>starts sniffing around....

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>>7885355
ZZZORRR!!
>>7885423
>fuck try a different mask
>alolan rattata?
>smack the fire with a baseball bat

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>>7885395
oh god damnit not again.
>finslap
get up, lava ass.

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>>7885428
>it's dark, I can't move, and it smells strangely good
>is this how I die?

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>>7885476
>Fucking Stone Miss
>Better idea
>Throw Heatran on the couch and wait for Flash Fire to activate

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>>7885505
>jeatran falls on top of nirie
>somehow a some of the gel coushioned the dameage
>roll of severety of the damage

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>>7885471
>Quickly puts the blanket on a freshly stolen sofa.
>Out tumbles the sylveon.
I'l show you around.
>Its basicly a showroom for sofa's at this point.
I got lights, a lot of sofa's and couches.
Some rugs on the floor.
I tried to make this place comfortable in case I got any visitors.
And these were told to be comfy.
>plops on a pillow and cushion pile

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>>7885390
>sends ANOTHER important message

Yo̽̆̌̀u͗̇̇̔̚͠ ̔̀ͤ̐̈w͋͗̐̈͊̀a̛ͮ̈́ͬ̑n̾̄͛͒ͤt̛̍ͬ͌̊ͫͤ̈́ ͠t̽̌̏ͧͬȟ͛͑̐͌ͩ̑i̸sͨ,̾ͩͣ̊̏̇́ ̛̓͛ͣ͒̈́̓̑dͬ̋͐öͤ̿ͣ̀n̂̅͂͛̑̌'̧̈́t̍͑ ̄lͦ̾̅̓͗͒iͤͯ͗eͪ̂̃̄̇̇ ̊̇ͨ́ť̓͝ò̈́͂͡ ̂̃ͣ̒̎ͭyͧ̍̏o͑ǘ̂ͣ́̽r͌͆ͧͩ̿͝s̶̅̔̒̽̒̽ͩeͪ͋ͦ̍͒l̸̑f͗͋̈́.ͣ̋͋͂ ̵͂̌ͬ̂̃͑ͩY̷̐͊ͭ̎̾ͧ̍o̸̊͛͗ͯ͆̚ū̿͘ ̀̆ͭͧ̐ͭ̆lͮ͊͋͛ov͗͋ͬ̈́̀ě̉ ̾h̨ͧ͗̈́̑̇iͯͯ͟m̀̈̀ ͪ̐̔̊ͦ͑͗̀ṙ̌̿̍̽̏i̡͑ͯ̐ͨ̾g̓̉ͨ̔̑̚͠h̆̉ͦ̄t͗͂̍͞?͋̆͋ ̶ͯDͫ͛͐ͣ͗̕o̕nͩ͐ͦͭ̐'t͛ͨ̔ͮ͡ ͨ̈́̀͋͢h̴ö̢́ͫͯͨͨ̒l̅ḋ͋͛ͯ̏ͬ͑ ̧̇̑̊̏̏̈́i͑ͬ͗̑͗̍̓͝t́ͦ͐̆̎ b̐͞à̵̈́ͮc̵ͭǩ̴͒̀͑ͯ

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>>7885481
>You smacked his camel ass.
>You are the worst boyfriend ever Archie.

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>>7885390
...You uh...definitely felt that didn't you?
...Yanmega please, I really don't know what to say here.
>more embarrassed squeaking

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>>7885541
>nirie is bleeding and uncounsious
>someone save him

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>>7885543
>blinks several times
Huh where am I?

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>>7885505
>AAAAAAAAAA
>>7885541
>>7885574
>take off the mask fuck
>definitely a zoroark
>one that doesnt drop illusion from being hit i guess???
>anyway apply bandages

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>>7885543
>plops down right next to steelix.

Where did you find all these?

>>7885591
A cave!

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>>7885591
>stares at the sylveon.
Your in my cave.
Were you inside that blanket?
I am so sorry.
>>7885606
I found this building where they had all this stuff.
I tunneled inside and then took it when It was dark.

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>>7885469
>"A way to shut down part of these.... senses would be nice"

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>>7885546
I don't know...
I love him, but...

>>7885558
...
Um...
Yeah...
>Nervous, flustered squeaks
I don't know what to say either...

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>>7885541
>>7885574
>PANICKED ROOSTER CROWING
>>7885598
... bawk
>Sit down on the floor and try not to fuck shit up more

>>7885642
FUG THE SLASH

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>>7885574
>paws at the jelly
Niichan wake up... are you okay?

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>>7885636
>Paints over the hopefully robotic eye.
Like this?

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>>7885598
>>7885648
>bandaes succesfully applied, nirie will not die
>still uncounsious

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>>7885549
...
>smack camel ass again
>those are some fluffy buns matey

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>>7885628
>>7885606
It's okay, it was kinda nice to be honest.

Nice cave you have here
>since she's fun and warm lets climb Mt Steelix one last time

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>>7885664
>is not dead
>but it's okay
>roll for how bad it looks

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>>7885648
...aaark?
>>7885673
>spray him down with some potions
>please arceus why

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>>7885642
Well...uh...just so you know, it wasn't on purpose.
...I would have asked first if it was intentional, at least.
...Sorry for ruining the moment...

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>>7885723
>Giggles.
Well there's room enough here.
>coils around both Sylveon and Zorro loosely.

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>>7885679
>Good, you're smacking a Camerupt ass in public.
>Why are you like this?

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>>7885670
>Blinking, vision has a green tint now
>Dejected metal noises
>"Sensory overload, I hear too many things and see too many things at the same time"

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>>7885731
>no effect
>nirie fainted, so use a revive

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>>7885731
>Ramble nonsense in the chicken tongue
...........
>Poke him with a foot instead
>Hopefully fluffy foot feathers will prevent impalement

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>>7885793
Uhh.
>Hugs the Beldum from the front, pressing himself against the eye.
Just focus on my voice then.
Or try.
Or I'l shut up and get you somewhere silent.

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>>7885628
Oh cool!
>snuggles up to steelix a bit...

>>7885723
she is really fun to climb huh? I like to climb her as well...

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>>7885781
>okay so i MIGHT be a butt pirate
>sue me
>okay that's enough booty
>slap the camel face
WAKE UUUUP.

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>>7885654
>More squeaking

>>7885757
...
>Sighs
I'm still not sure about that stuff...
...
So, uh...How long until it... Retracts?
I want to fly you back to the ship, but...

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>>7885813
>yes i knew that
>use that revive
>>7885822
>fox noises
...
>more fox noises
>damn that is fluffy

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>>7885760
Well this is different
>rubs up against Steelix
different but nice.
>>7885863
Yeah...

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>>7885868
>Wait how can a fish stay out of water for so l-
>Smack'd.
AHH! What?

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>>7885863
Go ahead, I like the feeling of paws and fur against me.
Its soft.
>Rolls over slowly, going belly up.

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>>7885877
>I really overestimated the amount of good Blaziken art there was
>It's all either shit or fetish art
>Which is to say it's either shit or shit
>Pet that floofy ass mane

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>>7885848
>Focus on the Smeargle
>Focus on this mind link thing
>The surroundings become less bright, less deafening
>"It seems to be working"

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>>7885933
>Dubsfail
>Man Dave is fucking terrible at being a chicken
>He forgot about the spurs

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>>7885877
huh? what happend? who are you?
where is jacket?

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>>7885933
>>7885967
>oh god sharp
>pained fox noises
>>7885976
>more fox noises

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>>7885890
you passed out from getting squirted with water.
literally just squirted, not even a move.

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>Helix comes back an hour or more late with Starbucks.

The pokemon to human wish is over for now.

>Poof humans back to pokes.
>I guess humans that want to stay pokes forever can say.
>But no poke-human shifters.
>Not yet.

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>>7885963
>Sits down and just drinks coffee with the turned Streambro.

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>>7886047
Thanks. Of all the Wishenings, that was by far the most pleasant.
Streambro, you alright?

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>>7886003
>Retract foot
>Sad peeping sou-
>>7886047
>Poof
fucking hell
sorry dude

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>>7885910
>climbs up on steelix.
>worried a bit

I sure hope you are right...

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>>7885873
I know, I'm sorry.
...It's just you were lying on top of me along with the hugs and kisses...
...Maybe it's best if I just make my own way back to the ship, it might be slightly less awkward for us both that way.

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>>7886047
>Human again.
>>7886007
>Put glasses on.
... You aren't a Sharpedo. You just hit me with a brick, didn't you?

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>>7886089
what happened?
why everything hurts, i'm on my core body exposed, how did that happen?

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>>7886091
I am alright.
Just tired.
And your comfortable for a small guy.
>Yawns
Hard to stay awake.
(Gonna go sleep, good night dude)

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>>7886047
>is no longer a fugging shark
well, that was a thing that happened.

>>7886118
i was though!
i had fins and everything it was so cool.
why the hell would i brick you after i just carried your ass to the center for exactly that?

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>>7886089
>ow im bleeding and human again
>get bandages
>kiss the dave
>>7886135
...
>put goo bab in shitty fish tank
>dump as much goo in too
>better i hope
...?

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>>7886073
It would have been pleasant with the ability to produce noises other than screeches and without almost getting overpowered by my own psychic abilities. Also the prospect of no more coffee.

>>7886053
Which is to say..
>Grab a mug and drink coffee the proper way
>Not even nudity can stop me from my brew

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>>7886173
i guess, thanks for the help, it might take a moment for my external body to take shape again, but now it will be faster

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>>7886157
Are you sure this wasn't just a bad dream? Mass hysteria?

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>>7886092
...
You sure...?
I wanted to talk to you about...That stuff when we got to the ship.

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>>7886137
(no problem)


>sits at the cave entrance alone.
>looks up at the stars.

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>>7886173
>kiss kiss
you alright man?
>>7886294
dupe
the burned couch and sliced neck would like to talk to you

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>>7886362
>Slugma quietly slithers up next to Zorro
>Says nothing, but stares up at the sky

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>>7886224
>thumbs up to goo bab
>drop a pizza slice in for new fish
>>7886370
>give him a thumbs up
>roll for badness of kickin chicken scratch

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>>7886431
>smiles
oh hey! Glad you made it to the cave!
>hugs

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>>7886362
>sits down next to Zorro and Slugma and wraps a ribbon around Zorro,
Whatcha two thinking about?

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THIS IS HNN WITH A BREAKING STORY

TEAM AQUA HAS TAKEN TO RISING THE OCEAN LEVELS AGAIN

TAKE A LOOK AT THIS REPORT FROM JANE

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>>7886475
>Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh

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>>7886448
>Hugs Zorro back.
>Smiles at him and >>7886469
I was thinking about how glad I am to have you guys as my friends.

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>>7886353
...Oh...
...Well I think I've...calmed down now.
>Sandslash gets up out of the ground, still feeling embarrassed

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>>7886370
Listen I can ex-
>>7886475
THEY WHAT?

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>>7886294
yes i'm sure, nerdo.
i can't prove it but i know what i saw.

>>7886475
what
i didn't do shit
have you idiots never heard of tides?

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>>7886469
Death.

>>7886525
Yeah i am not going anywhere!

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>>7886437
goes and tries to eat the pizza but the arms are too stubby
>tries to eat with only his mouth swimming, kinda,
ths is annoying the last time i was like this was when i was a kid

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>>7886437
>Did you know that if you go far back enough in the tags you get Dave Franco and Dave Grohl instead of Dave Strider?
>This is some weird shit, time to start up the drinking game again
>That scratch also looks pretty bad dude
>Chicken spurs are not to be toyed with
you sure dude?
looks pretty bad
>Control yourself Dave, absolutely do not touch
>... odds he pokes the scratch anyway because lol what is impulse control?

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>>7886538
...Did what I say earlier get to you or something?
>>7886525
I'd hug you but, yknow.

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>>7886537
Why would HNN blame tides on Team-
...Right it is HNN.

>>7886538
Red-7 to Cartier, I've got a visual.
Preparing to engage.
>Rolling for Sneaky Tranquilizer Dart
>Evens lowers stats
>Odds miss, dubsodds hits self with it.

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>>7886475
>These sensationalists fools again

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>>7886560
...
>tap the glass
>>7886583
>that sounds amazing
>oh god that stings
>i hope he didnt open a jugular
>roll to not pass out

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>>7886531
>Nervously glances at him, to make sure he actually is
>Breathes a sigh of relief
>Picks him up, and flies him to the S.S. Libra

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6

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>>7886584
Yeah i was-

>>7886645
.... did you guys just hear something?
It might be those voices again....

>>7886669
lel

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>>7886677
One day. For now I'm watching Bones dance around.

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>>7886538
I know you won't.
And I like that.

>>7886584
It's fine. I don't want to hurt you-

>>7886673
...
>Listens
Did you guys kill all the poachers?

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>>7886589
exactly.
fuck those guys.

>>7886669
nice try gem gremlin
but no dice.

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>>7886673
>ears perk up
I think i heard something but it could have been anything.

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>>7886660
>startled by the tapping
hey, have you never heard not to tap the glass

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>>7886660
>Yeah I mean
>Can't use Dave Franco when Dave Strider avafagging though
>Looks like I'll have to settle for only having a 200 image Dave folder
>You want in on this drinking game dude? Most of us are using water to avoid death by alcohol
shit
why did i do that
okay dude
come on
before you pass out
>Drag him off to one of the beds

>>7886748
2

>>7886673
>>7886707
>>7886740
MINER, GO!
>Poacher sends out Rhyhorn!

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>>7886661
>Sandslash fidgets with his claws while being carried
>he wants to say something to fill the silence, but can't think of anything

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>Meanwhile
>A bee is frozen in a block of ice

>Somewhere

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>>7886749
5
>>7886765
What?

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>>7886713
Yesterday you said something about having a lab.
Where?

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>>7886740
must have been-

>>7886765
THAT RHYHORN!


You better be ready....
>looks at the baton
Battle?!

>>7886795
9

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>>7886742
>jacket is not feeling good rn call back l8r
>>7886744
>pff ill probably be getting soda soon so hit me
>be dragged
>try to hug his arm

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>>7886781
>Roll to "bink" into.

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>>7886803
..you were asking if i had a lab?
why would i have a lab?
i just have a secret base.

>>7886795
>Miner (L50) used Drill Run!
>252+ Atk Rhydon Drill Run vs. 248 HP / 164 Def Sylveon: 85-102 (42.2 - 50.7%) -- 2% chance to 2HKO versus a L50 Sylveon

Take out the chaff, then leave the main target to the team lead!

>>7886862
>Bee does not notice something impacting its block of ice

>Kinda hard to when, due to the temperature being so low, bee's brain is essentially on pause

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>>7886867
>Why do I like this fucking idiot.
...As in a real secret base or as in a hole in the wall?

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>>7886774
>Yanmega is silent the whole flight
>As usual, she gently places him on the deck of the S.S. Libra.
Well, here we are...
...
Home.
I may have torn up the place a little...
I panicked while searching for you.
Sorry...

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>>7886908
>Stone Edge the ice block.

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>>7886895
>is caught be surprise
Oh no!
You look at me!
>tackle the rhyhorn because of surprised.

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>>7886849
>Alright mate
>I'm reading through every single thread starting at the beginning
>Everytime someone uses a euphemism instead of saying dick, cock, or penis you take a drink, as well as anytime someone uses the wrong image
>I'm on thread five and we have 16 drinks so far, so get caught up if you want
>The arm is hugged
>Plop on the bed
aight dude
bring it in
the best pillow is here for you to pass out on

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>>7886917
yes.
>smug butt pirate™
>shitty jokes ahoy

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>>7886955
>A large crack forms in the ice block, and part of it comes off

>...Taking part of the bee's wing with it

>Not a good idea

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>>7886895
Chaff? How rude!
>use hypervoice on that rhyhorn

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>>7886955
Uh dude.
>>7886992
>Flamethrower the ice block.
Bink you ain't good at this.

>>7886974
0- Atk Ninetales Tackle vs. 252 HP / 0 Def Rhydon: 11-14 (5.1 - 6.6%) -- possibly the worst move ever assuming L80-ish Ninetales

>>7886997
>The cave rumbles, but the Rhyhorn doesn't take a hit.

>Poacher draws out a shock rod!
Miner! Drill Run that Sylveon!
Let Tanker take the Ninetales!
>>7886997
>252+ Atk Rhydon Drill Run vs. 0 HP / 0 Def Sylveon: 106-126 (62.3 - 74.1%) -- guaranteed 2HKO v L50 Sylveon

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>>7886921
Don't worry about it, I'll tidy the place up, seeing as it is my fault for making you look for me.
Anyway, it's nice to be home.
...So uh, what now?

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>>7886980
(member phallus organ rod uhh meatstick fleshpuppy diamond hard breedingstick fry. just made some extra drinks for you)
>oh boy better not use necrozma by accident
>hug the dave
>pain cuddles

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>>7887049
>Slugma tries to be helpful
>He leaps at the poacher, attempting to grab onto him

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>>7887049
How can screaming at somebody miss?
>hyper voice

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>>7886849
well bye jacket
i'll just be chilling here

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>>7887025
>Well, the good news is that the block that held the part of bee's wing that was knocked off by Carbink...
>It got melted.
>Bad news is that the main ice block isn't melted enough to release the bee. Half of its head is outside the block but that's it

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>>7887088
nice hit
>covering ears

>>7887049
Slugma wait!

>runs after slugma

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>>7887113
Fuckin'...
>Put hand on the ice to melt it.

>>7887086
>Yep, that's a grab all right.
AAAAAAIIIIIEIEIEEE!!!
I CANT FEEEEL MY LEEEGS!!!

>>7887088
>252 SpA Sylveon Hyper Voice vs. 252 HP / 0- SpD Rhydon on a critical hit: 71-84 (33.4 - 39.6%) -- guaranteed 3HKO
>Dizzy, stunned, and unable to help the Poacher.

>>7887122
>You catch up to him, and the Poacher drops the shock rod on those dubs.

>>7887113
Is it hip?

>>7887199
>Forgot Pixilate, that's OHKO
>Also, on faildubs that Poacher cant send out new Pokemon yet.

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>>7887181
>Well, this is going to take a while. A long while.

>At the very least this won't end up hurting the bee.

>>7887210
>Bee is currently not in a physical state, nor probably in an emotional state, where fucking it is a good idea.

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>>7887083
(God damnit. 10 drinks right there, we're up to 26)
(Good thing I'm not using the Vodka like I was at first jfc)
>Run a hand through his hair and rub his back
>Kiss the top of his head


(>since your slot B is too big for his tab A)
(We're up to 27, take a drink)

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>>7887199
>gets really close and readies a fire blast
>barks
Who sent you!?

>>7887255
Dang.

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>>7887071
I wanted to talk about some things...

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>>7887259
(>force some down your rod)
(DRINK. We're at 28.)

>>7887265
>Poacher can't feel anything but pain right now
>Slugma fucked him up good
Fuuuuck.... yooooou.....

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>>7887255
>Fire type should make this a little faster.
Yo can you hear me? Sorry Ocho over there did a number on ya.

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>>7887199
>grab the shock rod and toss it into the cave

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>>7887321
>Slugma starts moving up his body, over non-charred areas
...
Uh...Talk.
Now.
>Looks at Zorro and Sylvie for advice

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>>7887259
>>7887305
(playing with real alcohol ewa a bad idea)
(phallus,, rod, organ, member, meat monkey, weenier)
>well at least theyre good pain cuddles
>kiss the knight

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>>7887327
>Fire type is how just putting his hand on it is working in the first place

>Eventually, the bee's head is fully out of the ice, with the rest of its body (it's still unclear what its gender is) to follow. It blinks, then looks up at Simisear, each action taking forever to accomplish.

>It... isn't saying much yet.

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>>7887321
>>7887379
.....
Go slower slugma. I want to hear him squeal.

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>>7887278
>Sandslash sits down and looks up at Yanmega
Alright, take your time if you need it, I'm patient.

>>7887409
>>7887379
You're gonna make a fine fucking coat....
One way... or another...

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>>7887379
Uh Slugma if you kill him he can't talk anymore.

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>>7887403
...You need a pokecenter bud? You're in Kalos.
It's uh...
>He checks his obviously stolen pokedex.
February twenty-fifth, twenty seven-teen.

>>7887433
>watches from distance

-Aloan Vulpix

(Joystick, lipstick, flesh Popsicle, baby batter dispenser, bad kiss area, )

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>>7887398
(Wellllll. I stopped when I remember how bad most people were about just saying dick here. That and I just like liquor desu. )
(Damnit dude. 8 more right there, we're at 34 and I just finished the XL soda I stole from my brother.)
(Time to move on to the gatorades)
>Kiss him
>Kiss the chicken
>Kisss the pain away

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>>7887476
>A minute nod comes from the iced bug. Doesn't look like the bug can do much else.

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>>7887409
...
>Is sitting on his chest, slowly burning a hole through it

>>7887454
I guess you are right...
>Gets off...
>But not before flicking lava in his eyes

>>7887446
You are messing with the wrong group.

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>>7887446
Is that so?

You are going to make a fine ash pile....

>fire now pouring from mouth.

How many of you are out here?

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>>7887498
(Fuuuucking. 39. Give us time to catch up damnit.)

Sure is cold lately
Gotta stay warm so I don't get frozen and become black ice
How are you all?

>>7887555
Better than you with those fail trips.

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(Member, Johnny, keycard, V card, D card, G card, play button, *power* button)

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>>7887555
(whoops)

>>7887454
>Poacher coughs up something red.
You... wouldn't...
>>7887532
FUUUUCK!
>>7887533
AhAHAHAHAAA!

We... it's personal now...

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>>7887526
Alright bud.
>Simisear gently picks up the bee and heads out to the Pokemon Center.
>The Carbink floats off somewhere else.

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>>7887575
(Fuuuuuuuucker. 45. DRINK.)

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<Anyone know where a decent bar is?>

gladi rper here

im not making it throygh this thread

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>>7887597
>squints
She wouldn't....
I will if you do not talk.

Personal huh? Likewise....

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>>7887581
Walking home with my team.
Well, more like stumbling home.
We have hot tea and an apartment waiting, at least.

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>>7887656
(What's up dude? Tired? Drinking game got you?)

>>7887656
dont die senpai
switch to water

>>7887609
>Bee doesn't react much to being picked up.

>Of course, proximity to fire type Pokemon means it's melting a little faster...

>>7887672
>>7887680
alcohol

did i mention my liver is shit

>>7887690
>drinking with a fucked up liver
(u dun it nao boi)

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>>7887433
...
This is really embarrassing to talk about...
But it's about sex.
I don't know how to feel about it, and I'm not sure if it would help our relationship...
I'm just lost on the subject, really.

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>>7887690
Dude I thought you were using water, considering what you said to me.
Switch to tea man, I don't want to have to hitchhike to Minnesota to slap your ass back to life.

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>>7887688
>Roll to get to the freakin Pokemon Center already.

>>7887658
>(finally, evens for interrogation)
>He squeals.
My boss... he's with Marshall... Carter, and...
>coughing fit
Wants you... dead or alive, don't know why you... instead of another Ninetales...
Marshall's dead, Darke and Cartier are hiding...
Johto and Hoenn...
>He shakes.
L-Let my Pokemon go...
>Proceeds to raise a pill to his mouth, and bite down hard.
>RIP Poacher.

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burn him.

>>7887734
.....
>flamethrowers the body until it is ash.

These guys mean serious business...

Everyone okay? What should we do with his pokemon? I vote we throw them into the ocean.