ITT: Pokemon are real. What things do you like to do with your

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>>7275158
Zekrom likes telling me about all the things I should change in the world.
He gives good advice on how to go about it, but sometimes I think he's a bit unrealistic.

..... I am not sure the Battle Tree is actually on Poni Island.

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>>7266912
>He moans his lover's name quietly, panting a bit.
>The tentacle brushes against a bright red beak which sends Darkrai into another fit of shuddering and moaning.

>>7275096
Hell I know, I lost count about a week in.
In two weeks you got transformed into a pokemon, sailed a yacht, made a good group of friends, stole the godfreakingdamned S.S. Anne, made friends very up high, obtained a flying ship through time/space fuckery, found your other half, had a kid and survived two simultaneous nuclear blasts.

One hell of a winter vacation.

>>7275169
That's the problem, truly non-sapient robots are still in the early stages and only a few super nerds have actually considered battling with those. So the best alternative is indeed more clones, genetically perfect clones that only think about the battle and otherwise need to be put away in a ball at all times.

And well, the Smogon U. simulators that nobody but themselves take seriously because life isn't fair. What a shame.

>>7275201
Oh it is, it's literally a massive tree where people battle.

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>>7275263
...I think I took things a little too fast. Definitely too fast on the kid thing.

My mind has also been fucking conditioned to respond to Lucy using double team, so now every time she uses it my face turns red enough to hide my markings. She is using this against me. Send help.

>>7275322
>My mind has also been fucking conditioned to respond to Lucy using double team
Yeah because you have the mental capacity of a Zangoose.

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>>7275158
Well, Amy likes taking baths with me, and getting cleaned off. She also loves it when I polish her, as she adores being reflective. I don't use any chemicals; just a buffing cloth and some water.
She also loves having contests of strength with me. Breaking rocks, lifting weights, you get the idea. Naturally, I lose every single time, but we both enjoy it.

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>>7275158
I used to go camping and hiking with my houndour, and he seemed to like running around while I set up the tent and whenever we went walking.

>>7275263
Forgot that you also became the star of the world's most popular reality show.

>>7275322
For a girl with deep seated mental traumas she's surely a frisky one.

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>>7275158
I used to have an Aron. We played together in my backyard a lot but some shithead snagged him from me.
I haven't lost a fight since then.

>>7275340
It works the same on humans dude, Classical conditioning. I took psych in high school, I know what's happening here and I am helpless to stop it.

>>7275374
...right, yeah. Reality TV show, what the fuck happened to my life.

I've got deep seated mental traumas too mate. Doesn't help that we both seemed to have repressed sexual desire for years before we met and then got aphrodisiacs dumped on our heads by Palkia.

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>>7275415
(fuck, not again)

>>7275397
So, Carter where are you headed to?

>>7275415
I don't know why is that these past two weeks colluded to completely wreck and remake yours and many others live, but maybe you could say that you're now freer than before, less repressed and with society expecting less than you. Apart the occasional show on camera, of course.

>>7275463
'Laying low' involves not giving out locations, my dude. But hes crashing with his buds for a bit apparently.

>>7275397
Ever dreamed about being a pokemon in the last few weeks?

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Take long walks to babbling brooks hidden deep in secret forests
>>7275360
Wow Amy is amazing

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>>7275463
Sorry. Can't give my location out right now.
>>7275525
I don't remember my dreams very well. I do remember having a dream about waking up and feeling like it was hard to move my body. There was rock surrounding me and I remember clawing my way out.
I saw the sun and then I woke up.

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>>7275514
You've got your show now, mate, this is how everyone finds out exactly how much I suck and Lucy rocks at video games:
>Insert video of the two playing Kingdom Hearts and being cute here

>>7275131
A whole day, that matches with the other know cases. Consider that very few actually remembered that particular dream, which is why I ask everyone that might know.

>>7275671
These controllers aren't exactly designed for claws and paws, haha.

Cameras are ready, now to get them sent so we can stop with the low bitrate dex streams.

>Stream announcement
>Z&L Plays EP1 starting right now

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>>7275360
amy sounds like a cool girl to hang around.

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>>7275692
I remember that dream.
I was a Zekrom.
It was very awkward, considering Zekrom was there as well.
>>7275271
I see.
Can you point me to the correct town?

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>>7275767
No they're not, but my thumbs work just fine and Double Team does the rest.

My fucking face though, god I'm looking back through this vid and it's so fucking red after that double team boop.

so glad Lucy doesn't seem to realize she can control that reaction.

Also, might want to hold off on those cameras, we might be leaving this place soon. We'll know once Page hatches.

>>7275610
>There was rock surrounding me and I remember clawing my way out.
>I saw the sun and then I woke up.
That's fucking weird, dude.

>>7275831
Er, it's a bit off the beaten path, you gotta go up the coast and through a path up to the thing. Locals call it the gauntlet.

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>>7275852
Oh yeah, uh, Jirachi, if you're here, miiinor wish for you, because I'd really like to avoid accidentally giving Page brothers or sisters in the future.

Not that we're having sex any time soon anyways, we realized our relationship went waaaaaaayyyyyy too fast and we're trying to slow things down and learn about each other before we go back to that. But I might as well get this wish out of the way now.

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>>7275572
>>7275812
Yeah. I really enjoy my life with her.
She's very prideful, confident, and competitive, but she also has a sweet side that she doesn't like to show in public. Only to me, and her close friends.

I've been there on her bad days. It was terrifying, for both of us.

>>7275831
Guess people destined for greatness dreamed of being even greater.

>>7275852
Or maybe she's feigning ignorance.
Don't worry about the cameras, these are a different model. Less sneaky, easier to relocate without literally losing a marble.
Even if you were to stay in that cave I doubt you'd get mail up there, this calls for exceptional circumstances.

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>>7275881
Yeah I wouldn't know anything about it. Probably just some rock type. The sun felt nice though.

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>>7275938
you need to be there even on her worse day to support her, you are a good trainer.
you remind me off my boyfriend when he was a human

So, uh, you guys? Do Rockruffs go through, like... heat or something? Petey's been wired all day, and when he came out to have dinner and hang out, his... thing has been half-out. Should I be worried? Should I take him to a center?

>>7276215
Naw man, that how it's like for all dog pokemon, unless he's trying to hump yo leg THEN have him checked

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>>7275925
Well you see... Changing really special stuff like that is more Arceus's thing.
Ahaha...

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>>7276215
Male Pokemon do not go into heat. Some go into ruts, but Rockruff is not one of them.
He may be going through puberty - either that or he really likes you.

>>7276215
Little dude might be smellin' some other rockruff gals in need, nothing to worry about. Unless he goes missing and comes back with a clan.

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>>7276263
Well, I'll uh, keep that in mind.

You're fine mate, I understand we've been asking a lot of you lately.

>>7276263
I wish you'd take a day off.
You could definitely use one after the last few days.

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>>7275997
She's been with me for a very long time. I rescued her from an abusive trainer as a teen. It took a lot of time to set boundaries and warm up to each other, but we eventually managed.

Over the years, I have done some bad things to her. Actions that I hate myself for. Actions that I still deeply regret.
But, I try my best, everyday, to make her happy. Because that is what I want for her. To be happy.

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You're a 10 year old boy with a baseball hat out in the long grass, and you see this thing coming toward you, what do you do?

(half finished pastebin of rules, recap and characters (missing recap and probably several characters) here: http://pastebin.com/ZqKZhGjY )

>>7276334
Become a man.

>>7276274
Well... I guess that's good to know. I mean, I think he likes me, but I dunno if he LIKES me likes me like that. We've been together a while, y'know, best bros, but... Shit, I dunno. Seems bad to just let him trot around with a boner all the time.

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>>7276295
M-maybe another time.
>>7276322
Well okay I'll see you guys later then.

>>7276357
Suck his dick anon, do it.

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>>7276359
Have a good rest!

>>7276406
Is that really necessary? Like... I could just... jfc I can't believe this I could just jerk him off to cool him down, right?

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>>7276353
And what if it's this one?

>>7276440
suck the doggo dick

>>7276476
I'm not gonna do it. But, like, how do you do it.

>>7276475
..Become a woman.

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>Tfw having a smoke outside
>News talking about the slaughter of people in the Orre based Aether chapter
>They're calling this the worst string of murders since the Alolan Psycho
>Citizens are urged to be careful of the Aether Evicerator
Not as good as I hoped it'd be.

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>>7276334
>>7276475
Arbok do not look like that
please take your twisted human fetishes away

>>7276558
Shhh go find a box to play in.

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>>7276571
but I am in a box right now
I am posting from a literal box castle

>>7276295
This will have to be solved the old fashioned way.

>>7276593
..Carry on then, forget I said anything.

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>>7276595
Unfortunately they don't make condoms for pokemon and I'm not interested in getting a vasectomy because I get the feeling I will want more kids in the future.

Took a good while to make him fit, but nowadays my Charizard rails me almost every night.
I'm pretty sure he enjoys it.

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>>7276558
It's not a Arbok, it's a human. Look at her human clothes. She just wants to give you a hug.

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Crap this place looks familiar, to bad I don't remember the way. Funny I don't remember a lot of things now

I'm armed with those machine guns those Aether guards had with several hundred thousand rounds so I'm good on ammo, I'd use my move set but I don't remember that honestly

Welp it's going to be with a while before I find my way outa here again, and I'm sure I have no one waiting for me so I guess I'll just take my time? Yeah that sounds nice

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>>7276359
Good night.
>>7276475
That is disgusting.
Zekrom would obliterate it to end its pain, after I speak to it to find those responsible.

>>7276533
>Aether Evicerator
No thats beautiful

>>7276533
So...I'm curious.
What is Guzzlord like, personality wise, as a Pokemon/ultra beast?
Kind? Aggressive? Etc.?

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Hey I just wanted to say thank you to that nice little zangoose and her friends for helping me find little aron!

sorry for breaking your door earlier i was just mourning a loss and i didn't want to lose another.......

Oh fuck. Okay. >>7276494 here. Shit. I tried to, like, jerk him off a little, but Petey got really aggressive, and he knocked me back, and... I didn't suck his dick, he like fucked my mouth for ten seconds?

Shit. Okay. This is bad, right? It... Fuck. I didn't like it or anything. He's not gonna do it again.

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>>7276751
Understood, I uh, don't really mind honestly, as a fellow parent I know how you feel, kid's not even out of the egg and when Maylazzle threatened to take her from me I just about lost my mind with anger.

>>7276793
Did you spit or swallow?

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>>7276676
Hahaha. Maybe it is.
>>7276745
I haven't really let him out besides in the base but he seems kind of snappy. Aggressive.
Not really "I'll murder you." Aggressive but more like "I wouldn't mind eating you if I get the chance."
I'll update you if anything new comes up.

>>7276835
Like... both. I kinda choked on it? It was a lot, and it was... thick and creamy. I think I swallowed some and spat out the rest, but I dunno. Fuck.

He's a lot calmer now, he's lounging and eating his dinner. That's good, at least.

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>>7276751
no problem.
i understand you about loosing someone important, like when i found out what happened to my parents, and why i was all alone since i was a young child

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>>7275158
I like to snuggle up with Faith n' Joy. Winter was kinda cold, but we did well, Going out for a run or getting groceries or preparing the truck, then head back inside, shivering, and wrap a blanket around us both watching tv, or playing some of the old 30's radio shows, like the Silver Spearrow and the early Zubatman, back before the campy 60's show and that goofy overly-gritty remake.

Then there was the lang-haul driving, as we'd take to the road going from place to place, delivering loads, or if there was no freight to carry, we'd take thescenic way back, stopping at every little tourist trap that caught Faith or Joy's eyes.

I think that's where they got a taste for dill pickles, because they always sold those individually packaged pickles at every gas-station and truck stop.

When I get back home, I am never, ever going to ever respond to a Call again. I'm prolly also gonna get a gallon jar of pickles.

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>>7276909
Let him know it won't happen again. If he respects you it won't, if he doesn't then that's what you need to work.

>>7276658
That's one small market but there must be a market somewhere.
>Actually considering searching for pokemon condoms for a stranger on the Internet
What is wrong with me.

>>7276669
You posted pictures of that same place before. Are you sure you're still in Sinnoh?

>>7276751
All's well what ends well.

>>7276862
Have fun with the IP on your ass for the rest of your life.
Someone get the Policefag on this guy.

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>>7277046
Yeah get the IP on me, Guzzlord is hungry.

>>7276936
Okay, I tried to talk to him about this, but he crawled onto my lap, looked up at me with like the saddest look in his eyes, and then nuzzled his mane against me. Like... It made him so happy? And I didn't... hate it.

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>>7276794
>>7276910
>>7276975
seriously i help protect this mountain. if you need an extra hand give me a call... I will rip our enemy's APART.

Also have you seen a smelly salazzle around? I need to wring it's intestines out of its eye sockets.

>>7277046
Not smart to try to start shit with someone like him, not to mention he did the world a favor with all that.

>>7277122
HE KILLED PEOPLE

I WISH POKEMON WERE HUMAN FOR 24 HOURS

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>>7277096
Humans aren't the only ones capable of manipulation, anon.
Stay firm in your answer or he will never respect you or your boundaries.

>>7277156
Yeah? He killed people, shitty people. Bad people.
Did you want more nukes or something?

>>7277195
ITS STILL FUCKING MURDER
WHY ARE YOU ACTING LIKE THIS IS OKAY? IS THIS WHY YOU FUCKS NEVER STOP PEOPLE LIKE TEAM ROCKET?

>>7277181
I told him we'd talk about it later, and he's snuggled on my lap right now. He's actually kinda pressing against my crotch a bit.

I mean, like, I love him as a buddy, but not like... that kinda love him. I think. I mean, if it makes him happy to do... that... I can put up with it. Right?

>>7277225
Gee I'm having trouble remembering when team Rocket nuked a continent when aiming for like, a handful of people. Or doing unholy experimentation on innocent pokemon.

>>7277282
fuck you fuck cops

>>7277282
well the experiment thing... kinda, Mewtwo exists

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>>7277256
It would be best for a friend to take care of your Rockruff while you evaluate your relationship.
You are seeing the start of a very abusive relationship where you are whim to your Pokemon's every wish if you continue this.

>>7277282
What about Mewtwo?

>>7277296
That was more creation of one fucked up entity than mass experimentation.
>>7277290
I ain't a cop, bud. But they probably don't appreciate that.

>>7277334
Fuck cops. I'm taking my pokemon to burn the shit out of the local precinct.

>>7277326
oh, fuck

okay he rolled over and squirmed in my lap and gave me that look and his cock was kinda out again and I rubbed his tummy and, like, next thing I knew he was kneading his neckrocks against my crotch and I nearly came on the spot...

I definitely sucked him on purpose this time. Mmf.

>>7277334
Is that really going to help anything? At all?
And if you DO go and do that, and they dont immediately catch you, you just admitted to it in a public forum so uh..yeah. You'll be in jail because you're a hotheaded moron and the people you think should be in jail will be out here actually helping.

>>7277522
>>7277468
Aaaand misclicked. Nice one, me.

>Be in Alola
>Some guy runs into Hao'uli with a fucking Charizard
>Torches the police station and runs
What the fuck is happening?

>>7277557
..Arceus damn it.
Just some whacko who thinks he knows everything. If you can, try and get the fire under control.

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>>7277557
that kind of behavior is not acceptable. rip his tail off!

>>7277600
Yeah god I think some fucking pokemon were in there. I'm helping with the evac.

Is anyone else afraid of those Mimikyu's?
Especially after... well, you know.

>>7277609
And I'm not ripping the Charizard's tail off, it was probably his trainer that made him pull this shit.
>4 injured and 3 dead.
I'm so fucking scared.

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>>7277631
any pokemon weak enough to obey that kind of command deserves death.

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>>7277225
Woah, there pal. I ain't gonna say that Team Rocket was angels. It was like a mafia, higher up, but they had some strong rules. Yeah, there were a couple psychos and a ton of losers, myself included. But even fuckups like Jesse and James had at least some sort of moral core.

Yeah, I did some questionable stuff with Team Rocket. But even at my worst when I was with them, I would never do some of the things I keep hearing about.

Then again, the last three days, I've done more harm than I did in the 8 years I was with R. I can't claim a moral high ground any more. What I do know is my life experiences. Take it as the ramblings of an old man.

>>7277282
Well....there was some experimentation. I don't know the full extent, but I heard rumors in the ranks like everyone else. But you're right on one thing: Rocket was not a genocidal organization. They wanted to unite all flags under one nation. And hit very hard when push comes to shove.To extend our reach to the stars ab-

Dammit! Not again! Sorry about that. Old habits die hard.

>>7277654
( ignore that accidental punctuation-link)

>>7277651
This really isnt the fucking time.
Oh my fucking god he's back, I think he's heading for the fucking school. Any Alola bros over by there? I'm fucking scared

.... Did anyone see that Aether facility go up in flames on Poni island? No deaths, the police are saying it was an electrical fire.

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>>7277654
team rocket had potential. I wish i was there to straighten them out before they gave up like pussies.

>>7277723
I would help your small weak ass out but i live to far away.

>>7277723
Grab a blunt object and channel your inner Alolan Psycho. Do it for the kids.

>>7277755
>>7277757
I'm going man

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>>7277771
Make sure you break them for me.

>>7277771
Good luck, anon.

>>7277730
No deaths? Could be N, he was on Poni Island last I heard.

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>>7277755
kinda hard for Rocket to go on when the leadership imploded, and suddenly the law hit hard from all directions. Did you see the show trials they did back in Goldenrod City? I was lucky, I was just a low-end transport driver. By then, Holly had been dead for three months and I was a shell. I was considering just taking credit for every horrible thing and just curl up in a cell for the rest of my life, but my girafarig apparently talked to them. I got questioned and probed by some psychic. Ended up getting acquitted and had to go to counseling for two years. That was my rock-bottom time.

Seriously though, there are some small groups, all claiming to be true heirs of Team Rocket. Feel free to build them back up or not.

>Running over to see what the fuck this anon is talking about
>This fucking guy sweeps over the goddamn school with a flamethrower

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>>7277914
organizing humans is like trying to herd skitty. I would like to but they are to far gone.

>>7277934
This shit enrages me.

>>7277982
Heh, sounds like you tried to do so at one point.

>>7277982
I'm trying to help evacuate the school. I don't know where the fuck he went off too.

>>7277326
>It would be best for a friend to take care of your Rockruff while you evaluate your relationship.
There's a lady friend of mine who wants me to do that for her Umbreon, but I don't know if I can do it. She says she'll put out for me if i "take care" of him for her... should I go through with it?

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>>7276975
Yes I am, after I escaped the Distortion Zone due to aether trying to take pokemon from there I killed all of those fuckers and left the base to find myself in the wasteland once more

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>>7277934
Which island is this?
>>7278074
If you aren't comfortable with the idea tell her that. You can always hire someone to take care of him for a few days.

>>7278186
Melemele I don't know where he wen't but I'm fucking scared. I didn't see the other anon so I don't know if he ran away.

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>>7278032
I once... yes... that was an interesting time of my life...

>>7278040
good! you are a good strong human!

>>7278186
Go get them N!!!

>>7278098
Well, keep walking south.

>these faggots trying to sexualize moves while Alola burns
Yeah you guys REALLY want to protect pokemon.

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>>7278301
We're literally several continents away and N is in the same region, we're also trying to NOT do something stupid and dangerous that gets more pokemon killed, literally everyone says we should.

>>7278319
I am online :^)

>>7278186
>If you aren't comfortable with the idea tell her that.
I just think it's really gross, is all. Like, she bathed him and offered to make him wear a condom, but I don't really know if I can go through with it. We made out for a while, now she's sitting behind me right now on the bed, and he's all excited and drooling all over the sheets.

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>>7278301
You sound in need of a good broken face.

>>7278319
Speaking of the moves, what's the ETA on that egg?

Because I'm getting those cameras delivered and I'm already at the airport.
Holy fuck this is going to be one long ass flight.

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>>7278428
...still fluctuating between a week and two weeks

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Should I grab a flying type and head over to Alola?

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>>7278210
>>7278240
Zekrom, Bolt Strike at that Charizard, please.

>>7278439
Just enough time.

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What is a meme?

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>>7278301
A lot of people and pokemon don't deserve what happening out here. And the very few people who *do* deserve it aren't on the news. I've already done my part in doing something horrible to stop something worse. No saving the world, but I took care of some people who were ruining lives in the worst ways.

I'm not a good man. I just want to go home now.

>>7278487
A funny pictures, usually with block text, that people keep spamming image boards with.

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>>7278472
I hope you fried that scum.

https://picarto.tv/Flygon
Ampharos in the stream

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>>7278439
h-hey! f-f-fuck you! you got me grounded!

>>7278487
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qyN5tNYhfSg

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>>7278579

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>>7278579
Watch your profanity, young'n.

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>>7278557
>A funny pictures, usually with block text, that people keep spamming image boards with.
What is the point of them? A human showed me a Meme of myself.
>>7278590
I see...

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>>7278599

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>>7278579
Don't you fukin swear little guy, just cause you're a kid and I like kids doesn't mean you can just say shit like that

>>7278283
K thanks man

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>>7278654
Stop swearing at the child.
Aren't you supposed to be deceased?

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>>7278642

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>>7278684
Long story short, Aether opened a Portal into the Distortion World to kidnap pokemon who've passed on, I couldn't stand for that shit AND I was also dragged there by giratina so I kinda went into the portal to the aether base and killed them all, here I saved a picture

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>>7278734
Google says that is an "anime horror."

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>>7278752
All anime is horror if you look at it the right way.

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>>7278778
That is humor, correct?
And Emrys I would like you to know I go by "it."

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>>7278718
maaaannn

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>>7278815

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>>7278560
He and his Charizard were knocked out. The voice of his Pokemon.... It told me it wanted everything in its path to burn.
There's nothing I can do for either of them, so I've left them for the townspeople to deal with however they wish.

To whichever anon asked about Coltess' satellite data - he confirmed that the location of Aether Paradise is inconsistent. Take from that what you will.

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>>7278863
>he confirmed that the location of Aether Paradise is inconsistent. Take from that what you will.
not if i have anything to say about that
19.987062, -157.864419

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>>7278863
I hope they get their justice. you did a good thing today, N.

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>>7278804
Yes, my words were mean as humor.

But going back to memes, sometimes they reveal thoughts that may not have been noticed as much prior. Like for example, if you watch a kaiju movie backwards, it's about a giant monster that goes into desolate ruins and builds cities for people.

>>7278863
Is that their main Alola installation that got busted already? If so, I meant like, a different island type..thing, elsewhere. I know they have to have another hole they're hiding in.

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>>7278914
really? now i have to try this....

>>7278947
Where's Jirachi? I wanna wish you back into a Ziggy.

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>>7278884
Then I guess Colress is either intentionally feeding false data or can't read anymore.
Thank you for the clarification, Gladion.
>>7278903
I hope they do as well.
Many of my friends were injured in the police station fire. It was the least I could do.

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>>7278884
what happened?

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>>7278967
no problem i mean yeah it moves but thats the area we try to keep it in
>>7278972
DELETE THIS

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>>7278992
who hurt you?

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>>7278884
>19.987062, -157.864419

neat.

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>>7278947
Also, if you watch the first Zubatman movie, it's about a crazy guy in a costume, fixing buildings, pulling people off the ground with magic fist-pull moves, and eventually turning into a normal, if traumatized kid after looking around in a cave full of zubats.

>>7278992
Awwww what happened to the Cleffa?
You would have been an adorable battling pair

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>>7278961
y-you do? I don't know if thats a good or bad thing....


>>7279021
well now i have things to do this weekend.

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>>7279011
lusamine
>>7279019
haha
>>7279023
you... know my mom has a clefable right?
its hers

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>>7278967
How would you suggest we purge the evil from this land? I cannot think of a good method.

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>>7278942
I can't say I know what you're looking for.
I'll send you the satellite imaging...
There.
>>7279019
Blue? Is that you?
>>7278992
I'll keep that in mind once I clear these other islands.

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>>7279103
.....yes

>>7279103
Thanks, N. I'll pour over every inch of this until I either find what I'm looking for, or the heat death of the universe occurs.

Okay maybe not that long I still have a job to do, but thanks.

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>>7279058
Yo Gladion look at this pic I found in your sister's bag
Gotta say you look nice in a dress

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>>7279103
if you need help i dont have any problem burning aether people
>>7279188
hell yeah i do

>>7279188
..Yes, yes he does.

Dang.

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>>7279148
i miss my old form.... I hate being a pokemon.

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>>7279253
...Hi.

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>>7279301
hey kid i'd sign an autograph for ya but these claws a- HEY WAIT A MINUTE I KNOW YOU.

You know maybe wishing everyone into pokemon wasn't a great idea for the people who didn't want to be a pokemon.

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>>7279328
Yeaaaah... Good thing you're not here, at least I hope.

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>>7279102
Evil will always exist.
Without it we cannot have a concept of good.
>>7279148
>>7279253
... Are there two of you...?
Regardless, there are positives- you no longer have to worry about being cold.
And you can fly.
>>7279209
Undoubtedly I'll at least need help finding my way around the island.
I will let you know when I get there.
>>7279159
Let me know what you find.

>>7279370
They were young(er by 2 weeks) and had found a source of practically infinite wishes.

>>7279370
I thought everybody plays a pokemon because they just like being pokemon.

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>>7279378
cool hit me up
i know a great place to get some ice cream floats

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>>7279370
>>7279378
it's not all bad yeah flying is cool. I just can't sign autographs any more very well... and i don't know how to speak pokemon and i can't human language. it's weird.

>>7279373
Why did you steal my FUCKING boat? I'm going to fry you!

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>>7279386
Feels like years to me, and uh, yeaaaah, not my best decision, I was hopped up on goodra pheromones at the time trying to cure them and the idea just popped into my head.

>>7279397
You think it's great and cool to be a pokemon until you wake up being one but also missing fingers, color vision, rights and representation.

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>>7279426
WAIT THE ANNE WAS ACTUALLY YOURS!?!?
I JUST WABTED A BIGGER BOAT SO I DIDNT HAVE TO HEAR MY FRIENDS HAVING SEX OKAY!?
I HAD NO IDEA WHAT THE FUCK I WAS DOING

>>7279432
>I was hopped up on goodra pheromones at the time trying to cure them and the idea just popped into my head.
Can we get Arceus to like... Erase the last two weeks of history? Because holy shit the property value in Sinnoh is at an all time low.

>>7279426
Did becoming a pokemon make you also unable to watch the news? The IP recaptured it days ago and it's waiting for you at Coumarine.

>>7279478
>implying this is a bad thing
INVEST! Radiation doesn't last forever!

Just a really long time.

>>7279473
>representation
You're literally EVERYWHERE.

>>7279507
I invested on a gas mask and I really hope it's enough for what I'm about to do.

I'll be honest, I actually I had invested on it in case of Palkia.

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>>7279501
does it LOOK like i can operate a remote control, smart ass?

>>7279507
PROPERTY IS WORTHLESS WHEN PEOPLE ARE AFRAID OF NUKES BEING DROPPED ON THEM

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>>7279473
are you me?

>>7279543
So wait for them to not be! Then you have prime real estate on a suddenly VERY large open area PERFECT for housing!

>>7279513
Go ask the goddamn league about representation, I'm waiting.

>>7279532
You look like a whiny bitch.

>>7279573
I'll be a fucking Froslass by then! And I'm male!

>>7279532
Yes, actually.
>>7279531
I really hope you're not going to do what I think you're going to do.

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>>7279578
and you look like a loser, nerd.

>>7279591
I need to take a Claws 101 class then...

>>7279583
And by then pokemon rights will be so good that even a froslass can sell real estate!

>>7279570
No but I still remember that "dream".
Imagine waking up on a nice weekend day with a long day of shitposting ahead of you and realizing that you not only have no hands, you can barely touch your own traditional HDD having PC because you became an electromagnetic robot.
I invested on more SSDs after that day, just in case.

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>>7279426
The Pokemon language is just like any other language - it takes work, but I'm sure you'll get it.
As for the signature, have you considered either learning to be a psychic or making a new one?
Manipulating flames to burn a signature mark would undoubtedly leave an impression.
>>7279409
I'll be sure to. I've cleared out Melemele, Poni, and Ula'Ula, so it shouldn't take long.

>>7279616
With the shit that Zangoose has pulled in the last two weeks? Hell fucking no, I've heard they've been legalizing stricter pokemon control laws.

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>>7279613
Double team helps, you phase the clone through yourself and change it's hand position and it's basically extra digits. Worth the move slot.

Also, seriously thought that the S.S. Anne was abandoned, didn't realize it was your honeymoon boat for Red, sorry!

>>7279591
As I said before, these are exceptional circumstances. I have never been this much ready.

>>7279646
>stricter pokemon control laws.
Like what?

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>>7279646
That is unfortunate. I really hope they reconsider.

>>7279646
You underestimate how long the fallout from not only a nuke, but a nuclear reactor going critical, will last. It'll be plenty of time for development! Both for housing AND rights!

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>>7279640
hmmm. this is a really good idea! I think you're smart enough to become a league champion one day. You really think outside the box.

>>7279646
they better fucking not be.

>>7279652
>honeymoon boat for Red
I UMM NO IT WASN'T

>>7279676
Things like battle curfews and no battles being allowed in towns anymore. Having to have tracking collars on your pokemon.
I heard they want to start putting killchips in pokemon in Unova so they can kill any pokemon instantly.
>>7279684
Me too man. When I become a Frosslass (male) I'm gonna be fucking salty.
>>7279687
I KNOW ITS LONG BUT FUCK YOU
>>7279701
Kanto and Johto haven't been nuked so they're probably fine.

>>7279710
Only if you take me out to dinner first!~

>>7279710
Shitcunts, I just recently obtained my trainer license. About two decades late.

>Kanto and Johto haven't been nuked so they're probably fine.
They're close enough that I would be amazed if the winds haven't spread fallout there already.

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>>7279710
.......

I am making team rocket again.

>>7279710
..That sounded a lot like 'Bomb unova please!'.

>>7279740
Shut up!
>>7279745
When you tak your pokemon to a center if they ask to take a "thorough checkup" get your pokemon out of there. I heard they're doing it without trainer consent.
>>7279747
This isn't going to help. Just let people like N do their job.
>>7279764
THATS A BAD IDEA

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>>7279701
...holy shit, you don't recognize the other me, do you.

I'm the guy that kicked your ass a few days before everything went to hell, the most recent Kanto Champion, with the Aegislash and Umbreon.

But hey, water under the bridge right? I'm an outlaw, you've got your boat back, and I think it's got infinite supplies, so you and Red can sail the seas for a long time~

>>7279710
Killchips. KILLCHIPS.

They better fucking reconsider that or they're going to have a very angry mob, not even from me, I'm in fucking Sinnoh, but Plasma's still got cells last I heard.

>>7279778
It sounds like a fantastic idea to me.
And my boys seem to share the sentiment.

>>7279782
I don't know man I haven't seen anyone talking about them. It's scary.
>>7279808
Please god don't.

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>>7279778
I am on N's side. putting killchips in pokemon cannot be aloud to happen. I will not allow it.

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>>7279782
I'm going to enjoy frying your loser ass.

>>7279808
Please god do? Well since you asked so nicely, why not.

Just gotta get these Helix-damned things working.

>>7279782
>and I think it's got infinite supplies
Uh yes it totally does (no it doesn't).

>>7279778
I'm really relieved that I'm not going to Unova right now.

>>7279880
>>7279848
Gah, hands still got the shakes.

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>>7279872
...I beat you once, and I'm stronger now, dude, reconsider this.

>>7279889
...huh, wasn't sure if that part of it got transferred over. was supposed to be a replica of the ship at that moment, so it was kinda unclear, but even then, plenty of space to store food and stuff, and that waffle iron was really nice.

>>7279851
PLEASE WE CANT START HAVING POKEMON KILLING PEOPLE THIS ISNT GOING TO MAKE THINGS BETTER
>>7279902
We need to fucking talk to
oh my god my fucking growlithe
oh my god oh my god

>>7279927
Talk to whom? Unless they've got meds to keep my damn welding arm in check I'm not sure I care to speak to anyone.

>>7279925
Replica of the ship right before it got stolen, just to cover up for the original being rebuilt into a flying ship of mass and ass destruction and getting some flak off you.

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>>7279927
What happened to your growlithe?

>>7279949
You need to shut the fuck up. Oh my arceus I think my growlithe is fucking dead
fuck
i need to go

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>>7279925
I am learning psychic. I will be unstoppable. The envy of women.

>>7279975
Please don't start any fucking fights over this ffor my growlithes sake
Please I don't want to lose my job I work as a pokemon land owner i help the breeders

>>7279991
Unstoppable in that little fantasy where a Charizard can learn Psychic, you mean.

>>7279977
Sorry for your loss, bud.

Now then, I gotta get back to work on these damnable things if I want my ass over unova in one piece. Good luck with the real estate bud!

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>>7279991
Uh-huh, and that doesn't really matter, we've got bigger problems now.

Also it'd be the envy of men, right?

Or are you gay? no judging, just curiosity.

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>>7280033
but N said I could!

>>7280044
I said WOMEN.

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>>7280075
so you'd be the envy of women... who are usually trying to get men, alright, got it, you have fun with Red, dude.

>>7280075
And I actually checked Bulbapedia, now what?

>>7280075
That would mean women are jealous, implying homosexuality.

You're not good at hiding it, just come out of the vastly undersized closet.

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>>7280001
I'm going to Unova to stop this. I need those weirdos up in the spear pillar to watch aron for a little bit. this war will be over soon.

>>7280110
Are you aware that there's an ocean and two regions between right? Over 12 hours of flight?

>Be a Unovafag
>Have a Ghost Type
I don't need to worry about this do I?

>>7280110
Uh, I'd have to recommend against that.
Unless that guys bullshitting or you like explosions.

>>7280144
Can you even chip a ghost type?

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>>7280092
did you read the article on bulbapedia that said you were a loser too?

>>7280087
>>7280096
YOU KNOW WHAT I MENT

>>7280155
I don't know. How the fuck are they going to chip something like Mimikyu?

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>>7280144
>>7280155
nah fampai.

well at least i hope so...

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>>7275158
>What things do you like to do with your pokemon?
Bareback doggystyle three times a day with my gardevoir.

... nah, I'm just kidding.

But we sometimes cuddle together with a movie or a book in the evenings. Comfy stuff.
With the latter, she just reads my thoughts while I read the text. It's pretty cool to be able to read together quietly like that.

>>7280158
I searched for loser and your face showed up.

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CASTELIA CITY YOU HAVE 20 MINUTES TO STOP THIS CHIPPING BULLSHIT
WE HAVE AN ICBM TRAINED ON YOUR CITY

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>>7280110
...wait for the bombs to drop first, dude, then if there's a mess to clean up you're the one for the job.

I'm staying out of this one, I've caused enough trouble already and I've got a kid on the way.

>>7280199
Nice museum piece you got there, take care of the rust.

>>7280199
Woah, shit dude, I leave for a bit and someones already beating me to the punch? Well hell, son, hope that thing doesn't critically fail on launch.

They tend to do that these days.

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>>7280125
you are aware I can flatten entire mountains?

>>7280155
what about that growlithe?

>>7280206
I can't just sit back and watch this shit!

>>7280252
Yes, but can you breathe underwater?

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>>7280199
Hey nice toy can I borrow it?
>hoops.

>>7280252
Wrong guy, buddy.

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>>7280257
.....
well i........

I dont have a plan yet!

>>7280263
..Uh..can I have my tv back?..

>>7280263
WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING

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>>7280289
Yeah sorry I left it in the Oort Cloud.
>Dumps it in your living room.
Close enough.
>>7280294
Putting your dumb toy in the Asteroid Belt!

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>>7280199
LOOK AS MUCH AS THOSE FUCKERS DESERVE IT, STOP NUKING SHIT

IM LIVING IN A NUCLEAR WASTELAND AND I STILL CANT FIND MY WAY OUT

So if you fucks are going to fuck UNOVA RIGHT UP, do it the Conventional way. But if they still won't stop their fuckery and fight back... DO IT NUKE THEM STRAIGHT TO HELL WHERE I DON'T BELONG

>>7280314
It's not nice to steal things like that, you should return it. Right over his head.

>>7280314
(implying you missed your roll bud)

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>>7280343
No way! My toy now.
>>7280350
(Ah I thought it was fine since the anon was acting like I made it.)

>>7280379
(we all forget that odds = fail, evens = success)

>>7280379
Can you nuke Spear Pillar for us?

>>7280414
It's not even a nuke, im pretty sure it's just a regular old 'boom' missile.

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>>7280388
(I gotcha bud, if the anon comes back and calls me out on it I'll reroll. For now its in purgatory.)
>>7280414
Nope.

>>7280440
I don't think it's even functional, but lets test that on his house.

>>7280455
(Nah keep the nuke I was just shitposting.)

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>>7280470
(Thanks~)

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>>7280455
Thank you for that.

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>>7280414
There are children there you fool. I will break you when I find you.

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>>7280455
Hey, uh, do you think you could send that missile to me? I can dismantle it so nobody could use it.

Plus I've been busy and haven't been able to go scavenging lately, and I could really use the scrap metal.

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>>7280566
No problem!
>>7280596
You can have everything but the boomy part.
>Dumps it next to his camp making a huge fucking mess.

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>>7280638
...There goes my shack again.
>SIGH
Thank you, Hoopa.
Although I could certainly diffuse the explosives and use them for my own purposes.

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>>7280689
You're gonna have to work for it then.
>Drops it really fucking far away.

>>7280750
Hey I have a question do you know were that bottle thing is that unbounds you?

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>>7280750
....Is it in Orre at least? Because I'm not leaving this desert unless Arceus himself makes me or I have something important to do.

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>>7280767
Uhhh Neptune I think? I left it somewhere around there.
>>7280811
I think I dropped it in that Snagem Base? Somewhere around there. Heehehe.

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>>7280835
..Close enough for me to care, I suppose.
Thank you, guess I'll be on my way to pick it up before some goons find it.

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>>7280915
Oh and I left one of those cokes with it that Giratina won't shut up about.
Or maybe the whole machine, I dunno.

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>>7280944
..Okay, two sand sleds then.
Thanks, bud.

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>>7280984
No problem! Happy Holidays. Ahahaha!

Policefag here.
The shit I'm reading from Unova is Not Fucking Okay. I don't really give a shit what the pearl-clutchers in the legislature say, this is textbook abuse under local, Regional and IP statute and explicitly -fucking- banned. I guarantee this shit will get overturned in the courts, and good fucking luck trying to enforce it. Half this precinct office would rather turn in their badges than be complicit in carrying it out.
You know what? Last I checked the legislature was adjourned.
I'll see you fucks later, I'm going to the PokeCenter to take some fucking names.

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>>7281034
Hey you aren't gonna kill anyone are ya?

>>7281034
You're an okay dude, dude. Don't come to work for the next few days.

If you catch my drift.

>>7281034
Fuschiafag here.
>>7280638
Thanks for dismantling that thing, stranger. You did the world a huge favor.
>>7281034
Finally, someone with some sense. Good on you for checking that out, man.
>>7275158
My Vaporeon and I cuddle, watch TV, and sometimes go down to the beach or run in the rain. And, ahem, other activities as well.

>>7281077
Don't be a fucking idiot.

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>>7281077
Hey you know it'd be a real shame if you were a quadriplegic.
>>7281154
It's more on the bone guy, I just snagged it.

>>7281158
MUCH too late for that, bud. haha

>>7281171
It really would, y'kno?


Disclaimer: Not the guy who wants to drop bombs.

Policefag here.
>>7281072
Even if that killswitch legislation gets signed tomorrow, this shit's still illegal now, so fuck "pre-emptive compliance" or whatever their justification is.
I'm not killing anyone unless they resist arrest with lethal force.
>>7281077
I really should report that to my precinct captain. That said, disrupting assault and abuse in progress takes priority over filing the paperwork for terroristic threats.

>>7281217
Do they even have any idea how they will implement their magic instantly-kill-any-pokemon switch?

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>>7281211
You still sound murder-y.
Say bye bye to your limbs.
>>7281217
You get a pass for now.

>>7281240
They're already doing it when people take their pokemon into the center.
Make sure your pokemon isn't chipped.

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>>7281262
How the hell did this even get pushed through?

>>7281217
So all they've done is kill a few Pokemon and sign their own political death warrant, and you know, strengthened the very thing they were trying to stop.

>>7281249
Jokes on you, I ALREADY LOST EM! hahaa, fuck aether.

>>7281262
That part I know. How they are going to do the killing part is what seems unrealistic to me. Mammalian pokemon are easy but then how would you, lets say, poison a klinklang?

>>7281294
Explosive, maybe?

>>7281290
Don't ask me.
>>7281294
As far as I understand there's several different types. The most common is an electrical chip on the spine that delivers an extreme electric shock.
People are already being shocked by their pokemon being killed.

>>7281307
I don't want to give them any more ideas but that seems to be the way. Also the most potentially messy way.

>>7281240
The physics are simple. You take a very small charge, implant it on or near the brainstem so the size doesn't matter too much, and use a microprocessor to trigger it. The largest part is the detonator. It's the same basic physics as old-fashioned cell-phone-detonated bombs, just on a smaller scale. Can't tag amorphous or gaseous Pokemon with it, but I don't think they thought this all the way through.

Coming up on the Pokemon center now, I'm going to ask for a little tour. If they've already implemented this, I'll be leading a damn train of detainees to the station.

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>>7281293
Okay you know what? I'm dumping you in a jail cell. Now shut up.

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... Some sort of strange jellyfish knocked me off of Zekrom...
I apparently hit my head fairly hard on landing, because I blacked out and woke up in a strange cave.
I have no idea where I am, but I think I can see a desert...

Also Blue, I said you could learn to be a psychic, not learn psychic. Moving a pencil with mind tricks will be the best you'll get without becoming a different Pokemon.

>>7281338
Yes, put the innocent man warning the police in jail. He certainly hasn't gone through enough in his life.

Please tell me I'm not in unova.