Haha I hate myself. Comfy edition.

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I hope you're all having a nice day today!

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>>10879083
Not really, cause it's really really early in the morning and I've got stuff to do.

Also has anyone here played Ghost Recon Wildlands? Is it worth getting to play with a friend?

>>10879121
Personally I'd assume it's not worth getting because it's Ubishit, but that's very much a matter of personal taste. But I got tired of buying their games and discovering that, yet again, the game was half-baked or obviously padded out.

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>>10879188
That's kinda how I feel. 99% of stuff they make either looks terrible or looks good but actually turns out to be terrible. On the other hand it's cheap enough that with my discounts I could pay like $15 at my local game shop.

Maybe it's worth getting this one on Xbox just so I can refund it within a week if I hate it.

>>10879083
Thanks, anon! I hope you are too!

>>10879366
Thanks, I'm lazing around on a hammock and drinking while dicking around on the laptop, so it's pretty nice. Very comfy Sunday so far.

>>10879264
Yeah, definitely make sure you can refund it if it's shit before pulling the trigger on it.

>>10879264
I've heard that it's fun with friends, but I feel like a lot of games are like that. Still, if it's cheap, you might as well go for it.

>>10879410
Damn, that does sound really comfy.
What are you drinking, anon?

>>10879438
Cheap-ass pinot grigio lol (cheap enough that it comes in plastic bottles)

Tastes pretty good and has a decent alcohol content though, so it hits the spot.

>>10879490
Haha, nice, man.
Enjoy the rest of your Sunday!

>>10879083
I need an opossum in my life

>>10879912
Thanks, same to you!

>>10880327
Don't we all? I'd love to have a pet opossum someday.

>>10880327
I'll be your opossum. :3

Where the heck is everybody?

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>>10881940
Playing possum.

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>>10881940
Lost in thought.

>>10881940
busy occupying myself with watching "If the Emperor had a Text-to-Speech Device."
it's pretty good, would recommend even to people who know shit all about w40k, since i didn't either.

>>10882070
Haha, nice one, anon.

>>10882090
What are you thinking about, anon?

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>>10879083
>Gum under tooth has been swollen for the last couple of days
>Can't afford to go to a dentist or doctor to have it checked out
>Getting small intensity headaches for the past three days
>Trying to fight off anxiety because I'm a hypochondriac
>Still failing to do any progress on my project
>The only time I feel okay is when I'm eating/after eating and fapping/after fapping
>Still no possum to hug

>>10882165
I like those videos even though I never played anything warhammer related, I just have a cursory understanding of the lore.

>>10882483
Oh no, anon. :( I wish I could hug you, dude.
What's your project?

>>10882537
It's a game, I'm currently stuck on writing the scene node class to load and manage objects, but YouTube and Doom II mods keeps getting in the way.

>>10881940
busy sleeping in my bed every 5 minutes because of my lack of motivation to even stay awake

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>>10882483
i haven't touched anything warhammer before, only thing i knew was that orks were cool and had weird meme powers. i'm on 16 now and it's like a 20 minute lore dump, it's great.

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>>10882476
Just life, and how mine has stagnated.

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>Live with family because Mother is old
>Cousin is moving out after staying with us for a while
>Help move his stuff to his apartment in my car
>Entire family comes to help him move in
>Be super tired so I go home before everyone else
>Spend some quality time drawing while home alone
>Gotta piss
>Bathroom is locked
>Bathroom door can only be locked from the inside
>"Oh I guess they're home early"
>Knock
>No Response
>Check outside, their cars aren't there
>Knock again
>Still no response
>Notice the light in the bathroom is on

Jesus Christ possums someone explain to me how fucking locks work so I don't start thinking that there's some stranger in my bathroom. I put something leaning on the door so I'd hear it fall if the door opens.
I'm too fucking spooked to look through the keyhole and check if someone's in there.

>>10882633
Sounds really cool! Good luck with it!
I believe in you, dude!

>>10882698
I know how that is, man.
I don't really want to be awake right now, haha.

>>10882968
Oh. :c I understand.
I hope you find a way to make things better, man.

>>10883009
Sometimes someone can accidentally hit the lock closed while shutting the door. It happens to mine sometimes. No one's in your bathroom I can promise you that, if you're not certain then see if you can get it open and bring a knife just in case.

>>10883094
Yeah you're probably right anon
Forgot that we got a new lock for the door so that's probably what happened.
Now I just need to find the key to the bathroom

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>>10883073
thanks, have a possum.

>>10883620
Oh, thank you for this. :3
It's very cute.

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>>10883011
>Scene nodes
>Sound really cool
Actually it's fairly boring, the cool part will be getting to actually implement datatables, UI and entity lists, it's the part where gamedev gets into full swing.

The actual scope of the game (FPS roguelike) isn't even all that large, I'm just lazy.

>>10883964
>FPS roguelike
sounds like my kinda thing, fellow gamedev opossum. I've been working on a dungeon map generator lately, myself. What are you developing the game in?

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>>10883964
Ah, well, I meant that it's really cool that you're even making a game.
Sorry that you're currently stuck with the boring stuff.

>>10884116
I'm using OpenGL and SFML (inputs), I don't plan on writing physics, just getting an understanding of it and then using BulletPhysics.

I'm trying to ignore the fact that I don't know how to make actual assets (even though it's voxels) at the moment, I actually have more skill in math than I do in art.

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>>10884170
Thanks for the cute possums.

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>>10884207
No, problem, friendo.

>>10884297
*No problem, friendo.
Fuck

>>10884170
not him, but I find the boring stuff to be pretty fun to write, personally. but I'm the kind of guy who gets a kick out of writing shit like memory allocators

>>10884189
ah, neat, I've used SDL before but never gave SFML a shot.

>I actually have more skill in math than I do in art.
here's a pretty good series on learning to do art, from a programmer's perspective: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOpeoDNlbwUFpO0MHxyQHh_fQjgnvG8M0
It's about 2D art rather than 3D, but I think at least some of it should translate over fairly well, especially with voxel art. I assume you already have a toolset for creating it, but if you don't, I've gotten the impression that MagicaVoxel is pretty good.

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>tfw I want to spend money I don't have on expensive music memes

>tfw want to fap but have The Sound of Silence stuck in my head
Hello darkness my old friend~

>tfw no opossum discord

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>tfw I have a song in my head since yesterday.
Curse you, Mark Crozer and your damned Broken Out in Love.

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Any other slightly suicidal possums around?

>>10888303
Not suicidal, but years ago I struggled with suicidal ideation.

>>10888303
Define "slightly".
Because clawing at self neck might not qualify.

>>10888303
the only three reasons I haven't done it are

>I'm lazy
>"tomorrow the sun will rise, who knows what the tide will bring in?" -Cast Away
>I piss the entire universe off just by existing and that's kind of cool now that I think about it

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>>10888303
Yes.

>>10888373
Pills aren't helping and I'm too lazy/pessimistic to see my therapist
>>10888401
Slightly as in I'm only holding off from doing anything because my family doesn't have the money to afford a funeral
>>10888425
Well same, I guess

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>>10888303
>slightly

Hoo boy do I wish slightly described it.

>>10888571
For fuck's sake man, go see the doctor and get your prescription adjusted, if the pills aren't helping. You owe it to yourself to find a way to live without wanting to die.

>>10888680
Not a man lol and nah I wish it was that easy

>>10888710
>Not a man
Well, I meant "man" in a general sense, but my bad anyway.

>I wish it was that easy
Fari enough, I know it's not going to be easy. But you really owe it to yourself to do whatever you can to beat this thing (again, I know it's hard to even get motivation in this situation). I mean, I know these threads are for those of us who are chronically depressed, but it's just such a waste to end your life. I'm glad I realized that before I actually tried to off myself.

Hey lads, been working on an ftp downloader that downloads e621 pictures and performs heuristics on their tags and ratings to make sure they are of some use. It also uses an ini file, where you can specify what types of images you want to download. Feel free to use it if you want.
https://mega.nz/#!AZ501Lob!BzUUrnlBPvBVI0FnlwBYNlQE4iK_p4nwS5SlBODtydQ

>>10888883
stop spamming this

>>10888571
Stop being an edgecunt and use your willpower you faggot. Fuck, whole thread's full of soft cunts.

>>10888832
Owe myself what? Struggling with bullshit that'll eventually end up killing me? I've already accepted that its better that I can distance myself from people and that I've stopped seeing the point in establishing meaningful relationships so not too many people will get fucked up from it.

>>10889012
They like to make shit up, faggot. I was """diagnosed""" with """depression and anxiety""" a couple years ago. Off the brain altering meds and living life.
Toughen up.

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>>10888954
>having a diagnosed mental illness that's been dealt with by doctors and medical professionals makes you an edgy faggot
Thanks for the words of encouragement, anon. I bet you're a lot of fun at parties

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>>10888303
yeah hi

>>10888303
Yeah but I won't. I've already built up my series of plans and fall backs for when I feel the dread of living come back, it's not hard to beat if you can manage to put the effort into mantras and etc.

>>10888303
Before I decide If suicide is the my answer, I want to 1: experience living alone
2:Find someone I love who loves me
3: experience living with someone I love
4: expirience college

>>10888303
Not really. I had suicidal ideation before, but currently I just feel indifferent about pretty much everything.

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>>10888954
>>10889057
>projecting

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>>10890599
>Pseudoscience

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>"Hey Anon, you've been acting kinda strange lately. Do you need to see the chaplain?"
>"No sir."

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Ugh, I've got to get up early for my course tomorrow. The worst part about it is that it starts at 9am and I normally don't even wake up until 10am.

>>10891845
good luck

>>10890814
>boring

>>10891845
That sucks, but it could be worse. One semester I had a class at 7:30 at a secondary campus an hour away from my house. Somehow I managed to be late only once, though.

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>>10891845
WOW ANON YOU HAVE TO WAKE UP A WHOLE HOUR EARLY FOR SCHOOL

Try getting called into weekend duty at 2am because some asshat decided to take the day off when there's aircraft needing to be ready to launch and head to places in Africa you've never even heard of.

>>10893238
oh, that's not so bad you big baby

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describe how you feel in 8 words or less

>>10893487
I cant stop masturbating to one specific picture

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>>10893487
i am unsure how to be

>>10893511
show us

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>>10893545
I dont know why, but somehow this hits all the right spots for me

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>cover up my window
>sleep 10pm to 10am
>uncover window
>sleep 11pm to 6:30am
sleep is weird

>>10893712
>Go to bed at 11pm
>Fall asleep at 4am
>Wake up at 6am
Yay.

>>10878896
I'm going too start my day today. I sure hope my cocaine last till payday.

>>10893487
back hurts, need stop putting off chiropractor appointment

>>10893765
damn, that really sucks. i'm glad i don't have trouble falling asleep, i just read a book for a little bit and i'm out

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>>10888303
Yeah. I look at suicide like my backup plan for when things get too fucked.
>>10893487
Why do I bother?

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>>10893487
getting there, slowly

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>>10893487
Useless, autistic and easily distract with no discipline.

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>>10888303
had really strong suicidal ideation for 13 years. The only thing keeping me from killing myself was drugs and cutting. Now I am on paxil to keep it at bay. Still have depression though just not so intense as before.Currently deciding whether to say fuck everything and start writing rather than putting myself through another slog of bullshit I don't have the fucks to give

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>>10893487
nature, scatterbrained, depressed, suicidal, virgin, peace, caring, nihilist

>>10893765
I feel yah. Do you smoke weed? I feel like that happens with me more frequently if I smoke too often

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>>10893487
I just don't know what to do.

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>>10893487
Language lacks the vocabulary to describe my feels.

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haha ahhhhh

>>10893487
I'm scared I'll keep getting worse over time.

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Hey possums. You've taken your meds havent you?

Come talk to me

>>10896968
mind altering meds scare me

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>>10896981
Do they make you feel better? If you dont tak them consistantly, they'll just hurt you more anon

>>10896968
Twice a day every day, anon. Although once in a while I forget to take the second one before going to bed. Doesn't happen enough to have an effect on my emotional state, though.

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>>10896968
i ve got some antidepressants since a week ago. they should help with me being anxious all the time too, but at the moment im not feeling much besides it being harder to cum somehow. they can take up to 2 weeks to properly work though.

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>>10897169
You're doing great anon :D

>>10897181
You've just been perscribed? Likely a low dose. They may not have an effect for a while, or even until you up the dosage. You just have to keep taking them so your body can become aclimated, so you can up the dose. Sorry abt ur cums tho.

>>10893487
surrounded by people who make me feel alone

>>10897269
>You're doing great anon :D
Best decision I ever

>>10897181
Yeah, it takes a little while for their effects to "build up" in your system. Delayed ejaculation and/or anorgasmia (difficulty orgasming) are known side effects of some antidepressants, too. If that ends up being too much of a problem, you should talk to the doc about it and see about having your regimen changed. For me it took switching to a different med entirely; the one I'm on now doesn't cause those kinds of side effects.

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>>10893487
Lonely despite wanting to be secluded from friends.

>>10896968
I don't do drugs.

>>10896968
I don't need to eat jewish mind control drugs to keep my composure thank you.

>>10896981
Same. I'll never take them.

>>10893487
It would be good to go away someday.

>>10896968
My anxiety pills and buttload of vitamins I need, yeah I take them.

>>10893487
Back and shoulders are fucked, want to change.

>>10893487
Buy it, use it, break it, fix it.

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>>10896968
Smoking my daily dose right now. Better living through sweet sweet Mary Jane.

>>10900222
Bop it?

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>>10899999
>>10900222
Nice

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>>10900222
Trash it, change it, mail, upgrade it.

How is thread tonight?

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>>10901170
Haha I hate myself

>>10896968
Got a wax cart, but I need to wait for my battery to charge.

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>>10901170
>New possum art
you're the best, anon

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>>10893487
Numb, except for anxiety

>>10901294
Haha we all do. Connecting through self loathing.

>>10901326
What's a wax cart? I'm an innocent idiot and don't know what that is.

>>10901345
You're the best. Thank you for being you.
I need to get back into drawin possums. I had some shit that was going on but it's hopefully almost done.

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>>10901777
A cartridge filled with THC-containing wax/oil for vaping.

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a

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>>10901937
b

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>>10902132
how did you make that backwards d

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>>10902191
the same method used to make the upsidedown n

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>>10902242
Holy shit!

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>>10901170
>suicidal thoughts
>into a panic attack
lmao
smoking now.

If you had a pet opossum, what would you name it?

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>>10903794
Fat Balls.

>>10903794
scuzzy

>>10903794
fidgit

>>10903794
fleshlight

>>10903794
snackpack

>>10903794
Trash-can, or Durry

>>10896968
Not yet, but I took yesterdays pretty late and the tablets have a life of like, 40ish hours?

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>>10903794
cashew

Any Michigan/Ohio possums want to meet up/just get a hug? Detroit possum here. Drunk and looking for something to do.

>>10901857
They're way rad and convenient, but they also like to break or otherwise not work as well as intended.

>>10906538
Lansing possum but I don't have a way to get to Detroit

>>10906644
I've never had a problem with mine. Are you using the recommended battery? I'd just smoke flower if my brother wasn't such a faggot.

>>10906682
If I started driving out there now, would you be down to hang when I got there? Also, do you smoke?

>>10906726

Dude that is like an hour and a half. And it is near midnight.

>not the guy, just a concerned possum

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>>10906538
is detroit as bad as everyone says it is?

>>10906761
it's 1am

>>10906761
>implying time matters
I'm used to a night schedule. I worked it for the last six years. If the other anon isn't used to a night schedule, I wouldn't go out there now.

>>10906824
Downtown isn't bad at all. If you want to die, head to the east-side.

>>10906842
I should be going to bed so hanging out tonight isn't possible. It would be kinda cool to meet another possum poster irl. Maybe the weekend could go to the bar so we're in public and less likely to murder each other.

>>10907057
Sounds good. Can't do it this weekend though, I'll be in Baltimore. Also, lower any expectations you have for another possum.

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>>10907057
>Not wanting to be murdered by another possum
What are you, fucking gay?

>>10907159
I'm not out to murder anyone. I just want to get drunk and hug the fuck out of someone who needs it.

>>10907159
attn david can you remove those opossums to my house thx in advance

>>10907194
I'd love for someone to hug the fuck out of me but i live on the other side of the country

>>10878896
What are these threads about?

>>10907695
Where?

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Well I just finished my school for the day

Why when you sit alone does some retard always come up and be friendly? the worst part is I'm too insecure to tell him to piss off.

Literally the grossest, dumbest person I've ever met and he's like 27 while I'm 19. I also accidentally gave him my steam username because he wanted to be friends.

I know I'm a bad person but that doesn't change the fact I hate him and never want to speak to him again.

>>10907734
Sharing our problems and helping each other along the way.
Finding love.
And of course, opossums.

>>10904542
>>10906179
Cute names.

>>10907968
in shitty hot southern california

I had a good thing going with a really great person, but about a month ago I decided 'wait...he deserves better and I'm awful!' and stopped talking to him.

I don't know how to stop doing this.

>>10907989
I've had dudes try that shit on me when I'm chilling outside doing work. Usually I just say I'm working on Illustration work and wanna concentrate.
Most dudes get the hint and slouch off to hassle someone else

>>10908168
Fuck, I do this too

>>10908182
Yeah, maybe next time I'll bring a sketchbook and say I need to concentrate. While I just draw doodles of gay furries. That's a good idea thanks.

Also now I have to change all my steam account details cause I don't want someone from my course knowing the kind of stuff my online accounts are. Ugh.

>>10908235
It's awful. I've ended every single one of my friendships like this. Depression is a hell of a thing and I can manage most of my symptoms, but not the shitty mind games that convince me that I'm a burden to everyone and deserve to be alone.

>>10908272
Can I see one of your drawings?

>>10908586
>tfw I only have like 3 people that I talk to anymore and one of them is my fucking ex.
Kill me.
I hope you can get past it, man. You deserve happiness too.

>>10908734
My drawings are literally stick figures and ms paint. It's awful but I just do it to calm me down and have a bit of fun.

>>10908155
I thought about going out to Cali to see a friend in San Diego. I have no idea where in California that is though.

>>10908857
Dude, go for it. Road trips are fun.

>>10908857
do it. I'm in cali. san diego is on the coast either just south or just north of LA i don't fucking remember

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>>10903794
Trash Bandicoot.

>>10911125
I like you, anon.

>>10903794
Swedish Chef if male.
Bingo Barbara if female

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>>10893487
I'm just glad to be here.

>>10908272
>gay furries
ey me too

>>10882165
Great series, funny thing, I found that 1d4chan has an article on the show. Surprised people are still editing the wiki. Thought /tg/ was on the decline, especially with the way they seem to bitch.

>>10882165
it's unironically a good entry point to warhammer
if you actually want to be part of that for some crazy reason

how do i stop being utterly worthless

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>>10916065
>implicating

you must be good at something, anon

>>10916077
maybe but im not good at anything that matters to me
i have goals and things that i want to do but they keep seeming to getting less and less likely to happen as time goes on
maybe im just whining at this point i dont fucking know anymore
i dont know what to do and im scared

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>>10916153
tell me of your goals and wants, anon-sama. why are they becoming less achievable?

>>10916200
i want to continue with my job and hopefully get a decent position one day but i keep making stupid mistakes and im afraid my boss is going to just stop being patient with me one day and tell me to fuck off
i want to meet up with some friends i met online but they dont seem interested anymore so that probably wont happen
i guess long term i want my own place but that requires me to be a functional human being and i doubt thatll ever happen
a relationship would also be nice at some point but again that requires me to be not shit

>>10893487
tired, nauseous and sweaty

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>>10878896
Hey guys, 2 questions.

1. What 3 bands/ musical artists do you like? Trying to expand my musical tastes and you guys will probably have good taste.

For me its Mountain Goats, Mice Parade, and King Tuff, definitely check out Mice Parade, their shit is golden. I'll leave a link to my favourite track by them but definitely post your own too!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Td49RkiIdU

Seocnd question, and this is a longshot: anyone living in Leicester starting next September? About to start my second year of university and I feel like I need new friends.

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>>10918052
1. Andrew jackson jihad, frontbottoms, neutral milk hotel
https://youtu.be/9Ooj6pEd6YM

2.sorry, but no

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>>10918175
Will check out the andrew jackson jihad, already heard NMH and frontbottoms, seen both live even.

I should probably state to not bother answering the second one unless you are, to save you time. In a weird state with current uni friends so wanna meet new friends ideally, and I only seem to open up on /trash, so worth a shot.

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>>10918257
Im in a sorta same state. Going into second year of uni, never had more than 2 barely friends in unitown, but im in therapy now and hopefully i can get over my social paranoya and get to meet some new people.

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>>10918368
Yeah man, I know the feel. I had to go to my GP a lot for narcolepsy/ alcoholism meets. Would just drink bottles of wine for a few days and be completely unresponsive to any social interaction for all of it. Fucked with my grades pretty bad, only passed my first year because I got one of the highest grades of the year in my final exam.

But that's besides the point, how did you find your first year? Did you have an overall good experience or what? Socially I made some fair-weather friends but apart from that been socially disastorous.

>>10918052
The Eels
Streetlight Manifesto
Days N' Daze

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>>10918520
Vongrats on that high grade.
Its been so-so. Academically, my grades are way higher than they have any right to be to this point, but really i dont feel like i belong into uni-life really. Everyone seems so mature ( to some degree ), and i have really degressed in my time there. I live in a dorm with a shared kitchen, but i have been unable to use that after the first week cause of my hard social anxiety. Besides, im dealing eith some depression right now, so we ll see how that goes.
What are you studying, if i may ask?

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>>10918633
The high grades were needed to pass lol.

I kinda felt the same, all my friends would go out clubbing and all I would do is pre with them then go home. I lived in a studio apartment so if I went home no one would bother me, which I kinda loved. WHen I was alone I was truly alone, rarely any interupptions. The issue with that is that I never really expanded my social circle. I was gonna move in with a new uni friend and a friend I've known since I was 6 (who wanted to fuck said uni friend), but new uni friend failed her exams, so now I have to take the parental role of taking care of all my friends and finding a new housemate.

Idk man, I can only really be myself when I'm alone, I just wanna make some friends I can relate with on a natural level, not pushing myself, you feel? With all my current friends I'm more a guardian than anything as I normally take care of any issues.

It probably doesn't help that instead of developing any decent loving relationships I just had a one night stand every fortnight or so. I feel sick thinking about all that now though.

If you wanna vent about this depression I'll be here all night, my life is a void right now, so talking would be grand with me.

Oh, and I'm studying English and Journalism at De Montfort university. What about you?

>>10918175
Anon holy fuck you listed out exactly what I was going to list.
God tier tastes CONFIRMED.

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>>10919026
Nah, there is nothing much to vent about on the depression side, besides the void you also feel. Just got some abtidepressants.>>10897181
But really, i havent been able to leave my small apartment besides going to classes and going home to my hometown on the weekends. Also, im kinda beat down cause our internet and phone connection broke down today and i get really restless when i suddenly get my internet cut off, so i wont be around for much longer. Just respond if ya want, im gonna read it in a few hours.
I feel ya on the " i just wan5 a friend who i can share anything with and be super chill with" part.

I study enviromental engineering at university of applied siences muenster at an outpost location in germany.

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>>10919285
Eh, while medication is normally the best route for most, I would say some of the stuff I was given really didn't help, but that may have been because I drank with the medication. I had the odd situation where I wouldn't go to classes or home, but on my off days would go to the city and just hang around at the local marketplace or a bar for a few hours. I've come to terms that I have an issue with alcohol and socialising, but it's a really hard habit to quit when it makes you feel so good to be alone and inebriated.

Sucks about your internet though, my only tip is when you have internet download a lot of music and podcasts and just lie down somewhere comfy and listen. I would download lecturer speeches and listen to them and that's probably the easiest way I learnt anything. Again, would heavily recommend Mice Parade, particularly the album Ramda if you want an album you can just lose yourself in.

I'll check again in the morning if you've replied. I'll be moving to Frankfurt next year though, so hopefully I'll make cool german friends like yourself there.

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>>10918052
Fatboy Slim
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zYue820v02A
FIDLAR
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ioMuDdNPIxQ
Bauhaus
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o3Cpy6EaRHE

The more I thought about it the more I realized that my music tastes would be all over the place regardless of the three I picked.

>>10919506
That's what I'm looking for though. Only one I'm really familiar with on here is fidlar as everyone at my highschool fucking loved fidlar, so the more varied shit the better.

>>10919659
MF Doom
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MleJFkjPLRo
Lemon Demon
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7M2Qt0RjktU
Bad Religion
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yvx6V8rsu-I

Have another three, I've never come across anyone who knew fidlar but where I'm at has no less than four different country stations and zero rock stations.

>>10918052
Whitehouse
blank body
Black Moth Super Rainbow

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>it takes me upwards of 2 hours to fall asleep at night
>it takes no more than 10 minutes to fall asleep during the day
it's not fair

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>>10919732
Aw shit man, great taste. I lobe MF Doom but have been listening to Lemon Demon for probably around a decade now. I love anything neil Cicierega does though. Will check out bad religion though!

>>10919968
Only one I know off this is black moth super rainbow, bought the vinyl for dandelion gum. I'll check out the others though!

>>10920035
Cute pic! I had a similar issue where I wouldn't sleep at night and I'm the day would fall asleep at my desk when I got home from doing stuff mid-afternoon.

Wanna talk about it?

>>10918257
pic mad e me lol

>>10920035
Ha, I'm the same way.
We are creatures of the night.

>>10920035
>another nocturnal dude
ayy

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>>10918052
Someone already said DOOM so I'll just post Umineko BGM instead
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NuRRe1moVhY
Godspeed You! Black Emperor
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PZwQeZh6rP0
Wintersleep https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fQZSU_-KyGY

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Just discovered this thread, but I hate myself and I've loved possums since I was young.

Is this what it feels like to come home?

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I think I'm going to buy a french press. When I put more effort toward the quality of something, it feels more satisfying.
I guess I need a grinder, too. I'll probably get a hand grinder. Something feels nice about the whole process requiring no electricity.

>>10922435
Yes. Welcome home, friend.

>>10908586
This is what's killing my relationship with my gf, longest so far has been a week without calling. Each time it just gets harder to call her.

>>10922435
It's less of a home and more of an abandoned motel room occupied by squatters but welcome nonetheless.

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>tfw took a swing and got shot down in flames
Life is short and life is shit. The North American opossum's natural lifespan is usually only about 2-4 years.
I envy them for that.

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>>10924433
You want to talk about it?

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>>10924544
Nah but thank you very much. At least I took a swing. All you can do sometimes.

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>>10924690
>took a swing

You're braver than I am.

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>>10896968
>take antidepressants
>get amnesia from antidepressants
>forget to take antidepressants
>smoke weed
>forget to take antidepressants even more
>get reality shattering visions and brain zaps
>Holy fuck make it stop!
>Take antidepressants for 2 to 3 days while I lose my shit and try to keep from offing myself
>start cycle over again

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>>10918052
Well as of late i've the most recent bands I liked that I listened to were Blanck Mass, Cavern of Anti-Matter, Sote, Danny Brown, and Lighting Bolt

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>>10919442
To what frankfurt? Therw are multiple here, hah. Im sure you ll make some friends here. I will try to get some podcasts if i can.

>>10922595
Fellow coffee enthusiast here. You may also want to check out the Aeropress as well (same level of convenience in use). I have both and they differ in taste. Get a burr grinder (hand); I use and recommend a hario grinder mini slim.

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>>10922595
I recently bought a french press and it tastes better than my old stuff. Its a cheap one one and i still need to bux a grinder and better beans, but its a start i guess.

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>>10924433
Hey, at least you tried!
Proud of you, opossum friend.

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Pocket possum.

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I'd like to introduce you possums to my favorite new game: "Mundane Would You Rather"

>Would you rather do the laundry now, or wear smelly clothes later?
>Would you rather eat McDonalds, or wait 20 minutes and make a real meal and feel healthy?
>Would you rather stay up late watching Youtube, or go to bed now and feel refreshed in the morning?

The possibilities are endless(ly boring)

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>>10929327
Wear smelly clothes
McDonalds
Sleep

>>10929327
Do laundry now.
Wait and eat a real meal.
Depends on how I'm feeling, but most likely stay up late.

>>10929327
i'm groggy as fuck in the mornings whether or not i go to bed before 11pm

>>10929327
>continue buying cheap clothes instead of cleaning them
>something out of a can or cigarette pack
>either stay up until 5AM or wake up at that time

I can't even do a hypothetical thought game right.

>>10888303
Yes, working through multiple anti-depressants and using painting to cope, but my parents just told me they feel like painting is consuming my life. Thinking about packing everything up and leaving for a big city to get more opportunities.

>>10893487
Lonely, tired, focused, forgetful, mostly empty.

>>10930188
I wish I had anything consume my life other than self loathing and time wasting. Best of luck if you do try a city, more opportunity also means more competition and higher rent.

>>10930223
Yeah, that's what I'm afraid of. Tbh I'm afraid of all possible outcomes from here, so I just want to go back to sleep.

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>>10929327
my clothes don't smell
mcdicks
youtube
no different from standard operations

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>>10929327
>depends if I plan to venture outside the living quarters, and how far
>McDonalds, assuming I haven't already been eating that for the past couple days
>I always stay up late watching youtube and doodling

>>10929327
>laundry, or smelly clothes?
Smelly clothes. I've got Febreeze in my car if it gets too bad.
>McDonalds, or make a real meal?
Real meal for sure. The problem is I can never decide what to make.
>stay up late watching Youtube, or go to bed now and feel refreshed in the morning?
Sleep, even though I feel the same no matter how much sleep I get.

>>10929327
>laundry
now because I like having fresh laundry
>mcdonald's or real meal
real meal, mcdonald's is usually disappointing imo
>stay up late or go to bed now
I wish I could do both somehow

>>10929327
these were meant to be example questions, haha
you guys are supposed to make up these scenarios throughout the day to make decision making more like a game

>>10934270
>would you rather think of something creative or just answer the example questions
yes

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>>10929327
>Clean my going-out clothes but allow my lounging attire to permeate the air with my man musk
>Pick up McDonalds and make some dipping sauce and fry up an egg to go in the burger
>Watch pornhub and fall asleep at ease with a pleased body

>>10934270
>do all the dishes now or once you've run out of tin cans to drink from

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>>10927269
I wish I knew, my university only says 'Frankfurt, getmany'. Would be working at Nintendo which while not planned would be a dream come true.

Podcasts are just such a great way to kill time, listened to loads. If you into games I'd recommend continuecast as well, is v good.

You got any hobbies at uni? I got into radio broadcast at uni at that built my confidence enough to try stand up comedy. As much as I clash with my friends, when I'm in a crowd alone I feel pretty great.

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>>10929327
Wear smelly
Cook actual food, an old coworker told me how good I looked after losing a bunch of weight, my true secret is crippling anxiety to the point where I would go days without eating.
I stayed up way to late last night I'm going to do it again tonight haha

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>>10934785
Its probably frankfurt am main ( a river ), its the biggest and most generally known one. Would you work at nintendo as an intern? Or how is that going to work?

I mostly listen to one german podcast and the h3h3 one occadionally. I think i will check out the hearthstone eppisode of continuecast as an entry tomorrow or so. It turns out the internet problem is a cable issue, and our landline and the landline of grandma is down now too, bzt at least o can relax because i know its neither a issue i can fix nor one i have caused.

I didnt really do anything in unitown besides leaving the dorm for classes while being paranoid of meeting someone om my way out or way back in. The rest i was in my room studying or gaming/reading really. At least i still talk with my old friends online almost daily over teamspeak, or i think i would go insane. But im serious about my social anxiety. Noone on my floor even knows i exist, despite technically having to share a kitchen.

Why are you going to germany specifically, or is it just by chance?

>>10884544
This sounds best in 128kbps

>>10934270
Clean up or just move the mess?
Breakfast or cigarettes?
Clean the mold out of the shower or just shower anyway?
Shower or just throw on a hat and spray some Axe?

>>10935002
I had the opposite problem with anxiety. After losing weight, I ended up eating lots of sweets, and gained like half of it back. Old habits die hard.

>>10935193
move the mess a minimum of six times
both
shower the mold away
throw on a hat, screw the Axe

any possums in new england?

>>10937280
I knew one once. I thought I loved her and I've been regretting everything I ever felt for her.

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Haha I flew across the country to watch my favorite professional nerds win at video games for absurd amounts of money and they lost every game on the main stage.

>>10937707
EG?

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>>10938126

Yeah. FeelsBadMan :gun:

>>10937280
sup

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How do I help my bf get a job when I can't even get one myself?

>>10938463
how do you get a job in general
especially when you're a hs dropout

>>10938545
This is my exact situation. It feels bad.

People always go on about how everyone can find work and etc. but I've applied literally everywhere in town multiple times. Like I'll do anything for minimum wage at this point.

>>10938267
This is my first time watching Dota this year, so I don't even really have a particular team to cheer for anymore. Sorry your boys couldn't pull it out, but being there must be fun.

Is this like a webcomic, or is this thread for self hating furries? I've seen these threads in the catalog for a while now, but I've never known for sure

i feel sad
every time i try to talk about or write down my feelings my mind goes blank
i think I'm some kind of retarded

i have almost no opinion on anything at all
i don't care about that many things
ive become increasingly antisocial after this one acid trip. i felt like i was going crazy.

i can barely talk to my mom

i dont have that many feelings either
it never really bothered me until i got into a relationship
now i feel like everything I'm doing is fake
why does my s/o make me feel like such an asshole

you know what I'm really glad furry porn exists

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>>10938624
Basically anyone who's self-hating. If I remember correctly most people here tell themselves they aren't furries.

They are of course, but I'll let them figure that out themselves.

>>10938624
first it started as a thread for the comic "habits" or "terrible terrible terrible", but eventually turned into angsty/depressed teen hugbox #97689 with literal underages

>>10938701
Shit, describes me just about right save for the "furry in denial" part. What's the possum for?

>>10938717
I take the possum is a character from that?
>literal underages
they're a plague. Sure, we all started out as underageb&s here but christ almighty are they annoying.

>>10938744
the main character is a possum.

>>10938744
Main character of the comic is a possum. Turns out, a lot of people here identify with unwanted pests that have hilariously short lifespans.

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>>10938744
This is the character from the webcomic. Also yeah, the threads were about possums, then became a comfy hangout and chitchat place, now it's kinda eeeeeeeh though.

i feel like I'm missing some very important lesson from childhood or something
why am i gross

>>10938433
n'much

might be spending some time up north

sup with you

>>10938463
>>10938545
>>10938567
As a possum that managed to land a shit retail job and moved up to full time with benefits but is still pretty shit this is my advise.
>Keep applying everywhere.
>Try shooting for entry level shit like cart pushing, freight unloading, dishwashing, or cashier.
>If they take a few days to call you, call them up and ask about it.
>Never mention that you really need the job or the money.
>Try not to have an anxiety ridden meltdown during the interview. This one is important, I've learned from experience.
> lie through your teeth about how you're invested in whatever it is the place you're applying to does
>it's okay to take the bottle of water but only take a sip after answering like every other question or so.
>Try hard to stay positive
Hope that helps a little

>>10938820
What are you doing up north? I'm wasting the rest of the summer doing nothing until uni starts.

>>10938545
>>10938567
It's been mentioned before, but y'all should probably get a GED or whatever's equivalent in your country.

>>10938948
not confirmed yet but it's this farm in vermont that was looking for help. They have cows

how's uni

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>>10938796
You are, but most people are as well. We're all glaringly flawed.

>>10939377
VT sounds nice. I'm starting a new program, so I don't know what it's like. Hopefully it'll be good.

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>You're living
>You occupy space
>You have weight
>YOU MATTER

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>>10939588
>tfw perturbation in space-time

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>That feeling when you want to get laid
>But you manage to piss off the only people who would do so making them not want to
>You are literally cock-blocking yourself

I fucking don't even.

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>>10927812
The aeropress looks neat. Man, and I was already thinking the hard choices were behind me after debating between a french press and a moka pot.

>>10928987
Yeah, I was thinking (read: hoping) an inexpensive one would be more than sufficient for a grand improvement, so this is reassuring.

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>>10939588
Just another one of the trillions of life forms existing at the same brief moment in time on some cosmic grain of sand. It's pretty comfy tho.

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>want to check out the new PoE update since theres apparantly 10 fucking acts now
>wait a year for it to install
>get in
>runs like shit even with the new resolution scaler option thing which makes it look like a fucking atari game
>stuttery as fuck and inputs are delayed as hell
>half the time it boots me to the title when loading an area
>it ran fine before, low frames but playable.
cool
i give up on having fun
it just never works out for me

>>10940006
Why not both? They cost roughly the same, i think. Here's some facts to help you decide:
Aeropress
> compact and easy to clean (literally just a tube)
> good, clean taste to the last drop (when using paper filter)
> the coffee autist's choice ( there's more than one way to brew coffee with this thing, because people cant stop fiddling with a piece of plastic tube like some coffee scientist )

French Press
> can also be used for cold brew coffee
> full-bodied flavor due to lack of paper filter; but results in residue at the bottom of your cup
> less portable in a sense ( it's very difficult to clean unless you bring a strainer along with you)

>>10940353
>apparantly 10 fucking acts now
What? Holy fuck. Source on this stuff? I haven't played in ages.

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>>10940396
yeah i forgot to actually check the map before i got frustrated but theres ten of em now
have some concept art of some nerd from the tenth one i think?

>>10940353
I run it ok but just died in HC because I'm a shitter.

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>>10940824
i used to play hc
had better drop luck in it for whatever reason
buuut dying before i even loaded in a couple times kind of
killed it for me
[badumtss]

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How do I stop hating myself?

People tell me that I'm attractive and pretty but I find myself absolutely repulsive. I have a disgusting body and I eat too much junk food and I never work out.

It makes me angry when I'm told that I'm attractive. I don't feel attractive. I'm ugly and gross on the inside and the outside and I don't know how to stop feeling that way. It makes me feel like they're lying or humoring me.

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>>10940366
Well, because the moka pot is also a consideration, and three coffee makers (on top of my drip machine) seems like an awful lot all at once. Though they're the same price, two machines is still twice the cost. Plus I want to get a grinder, too, which costs as much as any of those other things.

I think I'm going to stick with a french press for now, but an aeropress is definitely a future consideration. Eventually I know I'll buy them all because I'm basically a huge wad of caffeinated impulse held together with a veneer of self-control.

>>10941243
Yeah, you can't shake feeling like that away with compliments and people trying to yank your dick over whatever superficial appeal your body has. You'll always feel how you might right now, or like you have for a while.

Its easier to hate yourself because you're the only person capable of having the kind of perspective that lets you hate yourself in whatever ways that you might. Its unique and that's what makes it so devastating and consuming.

>>10941243
Hey, at least you're not obese and balding guy in your 20s that can only grow a beard on half of your face, and have a baby penis. [spoiler]:([/spoiler]

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>>10941243
I know that one. I've got some objectively good features to my face and build but started to hate myself around the age of twelve which caused a lot of neglecting myself and honestly didn't even expect to live as long as I have. I've spent my whole life wanting to improve specific individual aspects of myself but came to realize even the small changes were out of my grasp and the totality of my person bothers me to no end.

My life might have been nice if I liked myself.

>>10941332
Fuck.

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When you are feeling like shit because of reasons so you begin to read people's posts about relationships. Through reading it all, you realize how vile people are and you begin to detest them. You feel better now because you don't want a relationship any longer because you know what lies under the surface. You are not testing that water with both feet like so many others have before you and so many more will do after you.

>>10903794
Scaryface

i feel like shit

>>10942948
Me too
what's wrong with you

>>10942948
same.

>>10942948
same
really feeling the loneliness tonight

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>>10942948
it's a recurring theme.

>>10942993
i wish i knew. i just constantly feel unsatisfied with my life. i can't ever think of why and that just makes me feel worse.

>>10938603

Well, I'm wasted, that's fun at least. If what I've experienced thus far is of any indication, I won't have a hangover, but I can't be sure. Oh well, I'm having fun in the moment. Fuck future me. He's had it out for me ever since he started putting on weight.

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Haha i hate myself

>>10944920
this is so incredibly cute holy shit
i am in love with this picture this is adorable
i wow

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>>10944920
where is this from?
i also found pic related

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>>10945352
I dont have the source, just have it from a bnha thread on /a/. Or are you asking about the character?

>>10945434
<3

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>>10941310
An excellent idea indeed! I also started with a french press but after around 3 months of use I decided to buy an aeropress. Gonna shill the Hario Mill Mini Slim once more; can't go wrong with this fabulous burr grinder (hario skerton is ok too).

Once I get enough money (my wageslave resumes on 25th september) I plan to buy a electric burr grinder and finally a small espresso machine.

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is anyone here seriously happy with their life and if so what does it feel like

>>10946387
>>10946387
>>10946387
That's not the image I chose but okay.

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>>10941243
>>10941332
>>10941345
>>10941367

I am in the same boat. Have felt this way since I was 13. Neglected my body really early in life and got bullied pretty terribly especially because of my weight and body from me neglecting myself. Eventually, I lost about a hundred pounds and worked out every day until now where I am pretty muscular. You know what the problem is though, I still hate myself, I still find myself repulsive to the point that I can't look in a mirror or even see a picture of myself without having a panic attack or freak out. Even if you fix your weight and appearance it doesn't fix your mind. I am still a mess of mental illness and I feel like other people are just trying to humor me. Currently, trying to starve myself in vein hopes of feeling mentally better with myself. Also, as someone who went from being an ogre to somewhat approachable, looks mean a lot. I was definitely able to tell a massive shift in how people treated me just because I wasn't "fat" anymore. If anyone says that they aren't affected by looks then they are lying. Pretty people do get treated better, thats just ingrained in our monkey psych.

>>10943046
same, what was your childhood like