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Alright /tg/ I'm gonna tell you the story of Lunk the Barbarian.

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Thread replies: 29
Thread images: 6

File: beer_barbarian.jpg (97KB, 400x440px) Image search: [Google]
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Alright /tg/ I'm gonna tell you the story of Lunk the Barbarian.

Also looking to see if any of you artistic people out there would draw this olympian

>DMing a game over Curse Voice (was before discord)
>Group of mostly noobs and dime-a-dozen casters/theives
>One guy rolls a half orc barbarian named Lunk
>Lunk is Chaotic Good
>Chaotic only in that he would accidently break things from his size
>LOVED gardening, kept the party fed
>One day Lunk's garden is attacked
>Lunk goes BERSERK
>Takes smashed watermelon and wears it as helmet as he destroys every raider in his melon patch
>Never takes it off
>Party complains of its rotting smell weeks later
>Lunk goes to village
>Finds blacksmith
>"I want a helmet that looks like a watermelon"
>Asked him to roll persuasion for shits and giggles
> SUPER high due to his abnormal charisma
>Blacksmith makes him a gorgeous barbarian helmet stained in the likeness of a watermelon, even painted it with scratch resistant paint for him
>Fast forward a year later
> Group has made it to the final trial
>Fighting the Cult of Yig, the god of Serpents
> Psionic Archer captured and ready to be sacrificed
>Battle going south, assassin bleeding out, cleric unconscious
>Portal to Yig's Domain opens, serpentlike hand reaches out for the Archer.
>Lunk lifts his head from his character sheet

>" I charge the hand, I want to force it back through."

>Silence at the table

>"Its very possible you might miss and/or be dragged into the portal."
>" I know."

>Lunk rolls... and goes quiet.
>Picture Image comes up: Nat 20
(He had custom dice, watermelon themed for this character, knew it was his. Most trustworthy guy I've ever known)
>Group erupts in cheers
>Just as the hand of Yig is about to grab the archer, Lunk grabs it by the finger and lets out the mightiest of roars, ripping the hand of a god back into its domain, him with it.
>Portal shuts behind him
>Cultists in despair, and quickly routed.
>Party crawls their way out of the temple

continued..
>>
>>55363669
>Party crawls from the temple, barely alive
>Look up
>The skies are flashing with watermelon green lightning and serpentine fire
>As Lunk entered the realm of Yig, he ascended to godhood so that he might keep the Serpent King at bay and protect the world from his slithery tyranny
>Has been a god in every campaign I've ever run since

I miss that glorious bastard.
>>
File: Lunk The Melonbarian.png (195KB, 1357x923px) Image search: [Google]
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>>55363669
>>55363693
screencapped for eternity
>>
>>55364124
>p

Swear if I see this shit somewhere I will be a happy man. Lunk deserves to be remembered.
>>
>>55364158
I work fast, I shall spread this greentext
>>
>>55363669
>Lolrandum character
>Subversion for the sake of subversion
>"Wow nat 20 so epic" story
>>
Very cool, OP.
Very satirical. Me personally, I think this is a great thread, I mean, I, me personally, I love irony, and I think this is a great thread because it's so comically ironical.
>>
Ugh, I just hate thread like this. I think all this autistic faggot shit needs to get off /tg/, it's stealing board space from legitimate threads.
>>
>>55364201
>>55364169

Found the chads
>>
>>55364212
REAL chads don't shitpost here, my man, they shitpost /outside/.
>>
>>55363669
Is there a Reddit that takes Greentext stories from 4chan or something you're trying to placate?
>>
>>55364263

Nah. Just wanted to share my favorite personal D&D story.
>>
>>55363669
>watermelon helmet
>watermelon dice
>watermelon god

Wow what a whacky and funny game, OP!
>>
>>55364319
I'm sure people really enjoy playing games with you anon.
>>
>>55363669
Good story OP, made me smile.
>>
>>55364169
>>55364201
How about instead of saying it's shit, you all fuck off and let us enjoy it?
>>
>>55363669
>>55363693
I'm going to go with "Something that never happened" Alex.
>>
>>55367080

Agree it's a made up story. The custom watermelon dice. Gtfo
>>
LOL HE'S A GOD OF MELONS

GET IT GAIZ?
>>
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>>55363669
>Lolsorandomwatermelon
>HighChrarisma
>Making up stories for upboats on leddit
>>
File: 1500119027446.png (62KB, 230x261px) Image search: [Google]
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Guys I get it's pretty early in the morning, but still it's an alright story.
Story is probably still fake but whatever
>>
Ha ha, friend, you should not be playing the devil's game pretending to be anywhere close to God Jesus in even fantasy game. The LORD did not die for this.
>>
>>55367569
>>55367336
>>55367080
>>55367271

>posting on /tg/ and not knowing Tabletop Simulator has a custom dice feature
>>
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>>55367271
>>
>>55367964

OP here. Thats close to what he used, but this was on TTS so it was more striped than that
>>
>>55364303
My favorite DnD stories are the one of shoggy the seldom dog and EL TIBERON LOS LUCHA EXTRAORDINAIRE. TwoDee's amerika san inspired me to get shadowrun and shoggy's all guardsmen party is the best.
>>
>>55368512
I personally enjoy the saga of Sir Bearington.
>>
>>55368512
I fuckin love El Tiberon and Bearington, but its weird to see people can believe that was true and think that a dumb barbarian who likes gardening isnt>>55368610
>>
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>>55367044
Thread posts: 29
Thread images: 6


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