What went wrong?

he was killed as a mutant for having 3 arms?

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202KB, 682x1020px

Actual competent sorcerer coming through.

>>55314786
He decided to follow Abaddon instead of doing his own thing.

>>55314786
The Dark Eldar waifu didn't help.

>>55314786
>ADB
he just thrive on tg's rage

>>55314786
Why does that guy has a axe bigger than his own body? Is he secretly a Khornate? And more than this, why he has a bigger hat than the average chaos dwarf? I mean, i apprecciate a big hat, but when you can headbutt a titan in the groin with your hat, i think it's definitely too big.

>>55317783
Stole it from a Space Wolf.

>>55316721
She's an interesting concept for a character, but she's largely irrelevant to the books, especially Black Legion.

>>55316721
>>55318926
I agree. I think I liked Talon of Horus more because it was Khayon and friends adventure, where they acted out of their own will to achieve as a warband.

With Abaddon in the mix, Khayon felt so dependent, he gave a bunch of stuff that made him interesting, while having to act at command of Abby, instead of being a Thousand Son warlord.

And his role of assassin makes sense, but c'mon, a Thousand Sons general is so much more interesting.

>>55314786
shitty author self insert mary sue

>>55314786
It shows chaos marines as complicated messes of oaths, lies, bonds and internal conflict. Hateful but still caught up in wanting fraternal relations. Pawns of chaos and struggling to get vengeance before they're consumed.

The bits about the passage of time in the warp were great. Biggest problem is too many characters. Too many sidekicks, the spaceship, spirit animal and DE is too many. Makes the impact of any of their actions muddied/undeveloped. Too many side characters/super friends, not enough time to make any of them seem meaningful. I get how all four gods have to be represented, but I would have preferred a book from each of their perspectives to give a more interesting tale of the same events.

/tg/'s butthurt about adb is really enjoyable though.

>>55320925
Helllooo Carnac. How's your fine morning? Assuming you're not in some time zone where you're currently slaving away Chaosposting in the middle of the night like some slimy toad.

>>55320958
/tg/'s butthurt about carnac is pretty enjoyable too.

>>55320925
The new Death Guard ally Ilyaster wasnt very interesting or useful. The new book has almost the same number of support characters like Talon, but I felt Talon developed them better.

I know Abaddon is the poster guy for the book, but I definitly feel like if he wasnt there and the story focused a bit more on the other character it would be far more engaging.

And yeah, /tg/ is butthurt about ADB. Though I only disliked his take on Angron, everything else is either neutral or cool.

Aren't Rubrics repairable? I thought in the old fluff they could just be fixed with magic if broken.

>>55321101
>The new Death Guard ally Ilyaster wasnt very interesting or useful
Totally agree, there just wasn't enough time/space to be able to write everyone there as interesting or useful, but they all had to be there. 4 God representatives because 4 chaos gods, sidekicks because previous book and adb seems to write better when there's 4 characters to bounce shit back and forth with. But there's only so many pages and its not enough to make enough of that interesting, or I don't think he did a very good job of it this time.

If they'd done 4 books, one from the perspective of each major god's champion and one of the other 4 legions per book, showing their conversion to black legion instead of their previous affiliation, focusing on their different parts of abaddon's plan for getting out of the eye I think it could have worked better. Given a more conflicting and fragmented view of him, keeping him mythological rather than explicit. Its chill, they're not trying to be great literature, but I think it could have been made to work better that way.

>>55316721
At least ADB was smart enough to minimalize her in book 2.

>>55321323
She will important in book four where she dies.

>>55321369
>where she dies.
>he doesn't know
he doesn't know

>>55321323
I thought that was the worst part. I know people dislike her because "WAIFU", but Eldar characterers are rare, Dark Eldar characters even rarer. It kinda felt Khayon didn't care about her as much as he did before (which storywise it kinda makes sense).

>>55321608
>It kinda felt Khayon didn't care about her as much as he did before

Her is enraged when he finds out that Lyras is keeping one her feathers and is stalking her. It was presented as one of the reasons they came to blows later.

>>55321467
know what?

>>55314786
They made his hat too hueg

>>55320925
I don't have a problem with adb, but he is ultimately a subpar writer.
See, khayon is a typical example
>was a unknown sorcerer in the HH
>is now sorcerer of the black legion
>is now powerfullest sorcerer of the black legion
>is somehow equal to arhiman
>have somehow defeated magnus
Adb should have stopped to step 3, there was no need to make him powerfuller, we get it, he's a scary guy. Making a random dude the equal of the most powerful sorcerer in the setting, not to mention defeating a fucking primarch(who's also nb2 behind big E in term of psychic power) make adb looks like a child saying "nuh uh, mine's best because I say so"