Mages guild: Mageball League Edition

>>55293045
I like the rules as they are, except we could put some more chaotic stuff in there?

We have to checkmate all the other team's captains to win, right?

>>55293100
Could it get any more chaotic? I guess we could make is so Wild Magic is cast every-time someone makes a pass.
>>55293133
That's a possible win state. Most teams hide their captains at the back and force you to win by points however. We're currently in a stale meta.

>>55293100
Not throwing them over a lava pit like last month?

>>55293230
That is quite frankly still not enough. Only everytime someone makes a pass?

>>55293045
>From the back comes a voice of reason
>Quick, crush it before it's vial illness infects the others
I say we simplify the scoring system then make moves to make the game less lethal for players and spectators alike

>is wearing a referee's outfit, looking irritated
Why did all the magical girls get put as cheerleaders and referees...

>>55293230
What's the team limit again?
I can't remember if it was three or 30...

>>55293279
Every other round the teams have to pause the game and rotate team position counter-clock wise.

>>55293326
No need, we have it so healing alchemy is poured on all contestants at all times, right?

>>55293358
but that causes chaffing- err or so I heard

>>55293372
Is there a point system for chaffingness?

>>55293358
Counter clockwise? You´re aware that this game only uses an hourglass?

>>55293279
Alright. Then every-time somebody trips as well.
>>55293326
Both of those suggestions would strip the fun out of the game! What's wrong with you?
>>55293350
Because your department is just plain wired, and filled with weirdos.
>>55293358
Well, at the start of the match two pentagonal trapezohedrons are rolled, one for single digits, the other for double digits, and that's how many players are on both sides.

>>55293427
No I say! I would make it so that the players and fans actually know who's winning! and you know die less

>>55293464
Everyone knows who's winning! That's what the announcers and commentators are for.
...and you know. Those of use who predict the wins.

>>55293427
>She throws a large rock at Aphelion's head

>>55293045
MAGEBALL STATUS: RULE-BLOATED
POTENTIAL VERDICT: ADD MORE RULES
AWAITING CONSENSUS

>>55293414
Yeah, but that's for time, not movement rotation.

>>55293427
True, but then you roll the funny bones and kick the amount of rolled people out of your group to be part of the barbarian warherd group.

>>55293427
And how do we make them trip? Making them need to drink before gaming?

>>55293563
Why not making the field itself move then? Would be fun to see.

>>55293558
Sounds good, we can use the new rules to overwrite the old rules while still keeping the old rules a part of the game for unnecessary reasons!

>>55293581
Because it already does backflips!

>>55293555
OW! Why'd you do that! I don't try to predict these things in meetings! Takes the fun out of them.
>>55293558
A fantastic idea! I agree wholeheartedly. We should print the tome in multiple editions and then include links to previous editons for rules, but not the actual rules themselves.
>>55293563
I thought it was two funny-bones and a tibia?

>>55293598
Oh right, the halfway point rotation when the teams are changing the field sides, kinda forgot with all those rules. Thing is, the rules are part of it´s charm.

DON'T FORGET TO DECIDE WHO IS THE BALL THIS YEAR! I vote for the angry poser in the referee outfit!

>>55293045
>>>/qst/

>>55293640
We switched to using five patellas instead of a singular tibia twenty seasons ago.

>>55293676
I thought we stopped using people when we decided that a flaming chimera would be more fun?

>>55293693
Chimeras are stupid, you're stupid, and none of you know what fun is.

>>55293676
D..Did you just call me a poser?!
A poser?! Who do you think I am! You fool! You naivist, conformist prick!
>She starts screaming a hundred insults at him

>>55293706
Oh shut up and go do the same thing all your "non-conformist" friends are doing.

>>55293676
I vote we use one of the guild leaders, or maybe that idiot in the corner who keeps screaming about quests to himself.
>>55293693
Damnit. My edition of the rules must be out of date. Does the goalie still have to cast a warding ritual at half time?

>>55293676
SUGGESTION: THIS ONE PROPOSES CONSPIROMANCER CONSPIERRE FOR MAGEBALL ORB

AWAITING CONSENSUS

>>55293750
No, Antruthius was banned in the twelfth edition rulebook. Too OP, the ball kept winning.

>>55293704
You´re here again? You damned cat.
>Clutches her reverse tinfoil hat protectivelly.

>>55293763
I CONCUR. Oh, you sad sacks are IN FOR IT NOW!
>>55293770
Oh look, the woman INSISTING ON MAKING A MOCKERY OF THAT POOR HAT!

>>55293763
I vote yes.
>>55293733
>her face turns red with anger.

>>55293786
Oh right, you already are. Poser. Real non-conformists play as the ball.

Sorry to break up the discussion guys, but someone summoned a weird orange monkey in the east wing of the library. Do any of you know how to banish summoned literary figures?

>>55293763
No no no, the ball is supposed to be at a disadvantage. I've heard enough from Secretus to know this is not a favorable idea.
>>55293764
Really? He used to love playing the ball.
...Wonder if we could draft Secretus or Lupa. Lupa would make an interesting ball. Death's would probably triple.
>>55293831
Return the books on time. Easy.
...You HAVE taken out some books recently, right?

HEY GUYS! THE CAT VOLUNTEERED TOO BE THE BALL THIS TIME AROUND!

>>55293783
Tinny is no mockery! He is a proper tinfoil hat with an penchant letting things out and not keeping them in! And you will refer to him as such! He deserves SOME RESPECT!

>>55293704
So are we gonna change it this year?

>>55293750
I thought the goalies were replaced with koalas that shit bricks!

>>55293831
Bring the orangutan, he shall be the match's dragon.

>>55293846
>THE CAT VOLUNTEERED TOO BE THE BALL THIS TIME AROUND!

SELF-CONSENSUS: THAT SASSY-ASS FELINE IS GONNA GET WHAT'S COMING TO IT IF IT TRIES TO INTRUDE ON THIS ONE'S GLORIOUS MAGEBALL

>>55293860
Yes sir, right away sir.

>Muffled shrieking comes from the library

>>55293884
We should have FIVE balls this game!
Instead of the usual one ball, three discus, twelve pucks, and 24 birdies.

>>55293897
Sounds like the dragon has tasted blood already!

>>55293860
That was 8th edition! Back when they were literally allowed to build brickwork in front of the goal posts. Now there has to be at least fifteen feet of empty space aside from players.
>>55293917
You forgot the Javelins! Please tell me the Javelins are still part of the rule-set, I've been missing from the guild for some time.

>>55293917
CORRECTION: 1X BALL, 3X DISCUSS, 12X PICKS, 24X BIRDIES, 100X EXPENDABLE GOBLINS

Bah! Rules...

In my day we left it up to our row talents and mastery! I say we throw the rules in the rubbish and start anew.

Rule 1: A mate from the hosting region provides one of their apprentices to serve as the ball.

>>55293951
If we're using expendable goblins, can I bring my prototype inter-planar goblin flinger? "It thrills as it kills!"

>>55293979
RESPONSE: PROTOTYPE GOBLIN FINGERS ARE NOT WITHIN CELESTIAL BUREAUCRACY-APPROVED MAGEBALL RULES

>>55293884
Oh, that trophy is gonna be MINE you infernal polygon!
>>55293846
YOU RUINED ALL THAT HE STANDS FOR!
>>55293842
Secretus is terrible at ball and you know it.

>>55294011
SELF-CONSENSU: MY FORM IS EXCEPTIONALLY AERODYNAMIC IN 5 OF THE 7 GRAVITY STATES WITHIN A MAGEBALL GAME. YOUR ASS IS THE GRASS.

>>55293934
Are javelins scoring tools?

>>55293977
Boo!
That sounds like simplistic talk to me!

>>55294000
Can we make them part of the rules?

>>55294011
I think all catboys must do the Kitty Cat Dance every time a person scores a point via bull-frogging!

>>55293977
It seems my magical ink is changing itself again. Troublesome.

What team was it that won last year? I can't remember if I forgot or if I forgot to remember.

>>55294011
No, I did not! I raised him from when he was a mere sock!

>>55294028
But don´t you need 7 gravity states to function?

>>55294043
I think it was red team number 63.

>>55294033
POTENTIAL VERDICT: GOBLIN-FLINGERS ADDED TO MAGEBALL RULES.

AWAITING CONSENSUS

>>55294057
I vote we make a rule to ban them, then make another rule specifically to unban them.

>>55294051
PROCESSING RESPONSE
PROCESSING RESPONSE
PROCESSING RESPONSE
...RESPONSE: THAT IS IRRELEVANT

>>55294057
Goblin Flingers can be added but with the rule of thumb that the goblins have to have large chain balls attached to them!

>>55293977
The hosting regions are already afraid of losing their star players. Besides, I'm from the first age and we only had 100 rules then.
>>55294011
I know it, but I'd just like the chance to see him in uniform again so I can laugh at the picture of him in the team lineup from the ninth season.
Glad I found it in one of the drawers.
>>55294033
They are if you throw them sideways.
>>55294057
Only if they're in the wing back position!

>>55294043
Team stank wrangle won it.
>>55294033
BULFROGGING IS ONLY ALLOWED AT THE APOGEE OF AN ORBIT YOU IMBECILE!
>>55294028
Non-euclidean hexahydra is going to take your lunch money just like he does every year!
>>55294051
THERE IS NO POINT TO A TINFOIL SOCK, NOBODY IS GOING TO TRY AND READ MY FOOT'S MIND!

>>55294077
Where do you score them? In the pig skin baskets?

>>55294080
YOUR POINT!?
I'm gonna do it at least five times to spite you!

>>55294073
No logic bomb? Damn shame. Say could you tell me about the first rules ever made again?

>>55294080
Which is why he grew up to be a hat! And besides he exposes your mind, not protectign it! HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO REPEAT MYSELF!?!

>>55294080
>Non-euclidean hexahydra is going to take your lunch money just like he does every year!
SELF-CONSENUS: GOOD THING THAT THIS ONE IS BRINGING HOME LUNCHES LIKE A TRUE PATRICIAN

>>55294101
No no no, in the bat wing nets. The rule was added specifically to make the ball retrievers work harder. It was always so exciting watching them dodge sharp objects!

>>55294127
>Say could you tell me about the first rules ever made again?
MODIFICATION: FOR SIMPLICITY'S SAKE THIS ONE WILL ONLY LIST THE FIRST 7, SINCE IT IS THE MOST AESTHETICALLY PLEASING NUMBER.

RULE ONE: KICKING THE BALL IS FORBIDDEN

RULE TWO: EXPLOSIVE FROGS ARE ONLY ALLOWED IN THE BACK QUADRANT

RULE THREE: NO GREMLINS

RULE FOUR: MAKE SURE TO ADHERE TO THE POINT COST

RULE FIVE: SNACKS ARE ONLY AVAILABLE TO THOSE WHO KICK THE BALL

RULE SIX: 4 OF THE SEVEN GRAVITY STATES MUS TBE ACCOMPANIED WITH AS THE DOCUMENT SAYS, "TRIPPY LIGHTING."

RULE SEVEN: RULE SEVEN

>>55294162
Wait wait wait. I was ALIVE when those rules were made. You've mistaken rule Seven for rule Eight.

>>55294162
You do remember that there where only 7 and a half rules at first, right? I mean who exactly forgets - RULE 7 1/2: ADDITIONAL RULES MAY BE ADDED AT THE WHIM OF THE MAGES CURRENTLY ALIVE:

>>55294187
RESPONSE: YOU ARE CORRECT. PLANAR SELF-FLOGGING SCHEDULE FOR THE TWENTY-FIFTH HOUR.

SELF-CORRECTION:

RULE SEVEN: ORCS ARE AN ACCEPTABLE ALTERNATIVE TO GOBLINS IF THE GOBLIN SUPPLY IN THE CURRENT MAGEBALL PLANE IS RUNNING LOW.

>>55294213
>>55294162
CAN WE START ALREADY!?
This outfit hurts!

>>55294227
CORRECTION: THE GAME HAS ALREADY STARTED. TEAM SLOW-MOVING BACTERIA IS CURRENTLY HEADING FOR THE BALL AS WE SPEAK.

>>55294158
So, what about the Juggernaut Frisbee?
That's still a thing, right?

>>55294227
Then get in a cheer leading outfit.
>He tosses Dove a heavy fur outfit that looks like it will cover Dove head to toe

>>55294209
Yes, but that got corrected in the 4th expansion - RULE π: ONLY MAGES OF A NON-HIVE MIND INTELLEGENCE CAN ADD RULES

Had to be added after the sentient ozzes kept trying to get the mageball plane moved to the semi-elemental plane of hydrochloric acid.

>>55294213
Oh! Never forget rule about using moon elves as flag-posts. I love that rule.
>>55294227
You started the game the second you threw that rock. Shame the pitch is outside.
>>55294244
It seems to be, however one is only placed on the field every seventeen and a half minutes. That's IF the keg is still empty as well.

How do I into this?

>>55294227
Show a bit more pride in your clothes. They make the woman!

>>55294276
I heard about that era. Wasn´t born yet then. Wasn´t that the one with the hardened ooze balls as equipment? Gave alot of broken bones.

>>55294306
Pick a name and act like you're the only sane one in the room. It's what we do.
The Mageball topic is essentially Calvinball,
make up some rules!

>>55294337
No no no, that was the era before that, besides, we just made sure we all knew how to cast 'Ooze to gas'

>>55294337
RESPONSE: INDEED. IT IS A GOOD THING THAT RULE 870, "ALL OOZE BALLS DETONATE WITH GREAT AND TERRIBLE FORCE UPON ENTERING THE MAGEBALL PLANE," ELIMINATED THAT META. UNFORTUNATELY MANY TEAMS STILL TRIED TO BRING IN OOZEBALLS, RESULTING IN EVEN MORE BROKEN BONES.

>>55294279
It still explodes if it's held by the same person for thirty seconds, right?

>>55294306
Well you slap your nametag on.
aka enter a character name into the Name Field
Make sure you got at least a short version of your tragic back story memorized.
Best to be prepared, but it's fun to make things up on the fly too!
And suggest rules for this year's Mageball that are totally logical and are definitely not silly in any way or manner, just like goblin-chucking and exploding frisbees.

>>55294399
Goblin throwing is a perfectly sensible rule! Plus I get to use orcs now too.

>>55294376
And got gas attacks banned as a result.
>Hold up a copy of Mageballs: A history

>>55294379
Just a question. Do you get that info from an archive or where you there? I don´t see a dent in you.

>Steals the ball and makes his escape Via diving out the window

>>55294399
Twenty nine and a half seconds. So basically yes.
Do you remember if the war drums were legal or not after the finals in the north? I got thrown through time before I could see the match.
>>55294431
Gas attacks were the best! Gods, this new season is going to be a drag.
>>55294442
AAAAAAAND HE'S OFF!

>>55294442
Stop thief!

Wait, isn't the ball a dragon?

>>55294431
>Just a question. Do you get that info from an archive or where you there? I don´t see a dent in you.
INFORMATION: WHAT YOU ARE SEEING IS ACTUALLY THIS ONE'S SHADOW ON THIS MATERIAL PLANE, ALL SCARS ARE SITUATED ON THIS ONE'S MUCH LARGER "NATURAL" FORM. THAT BEING SAID, THIS ONE IS MOSTLY HERE TO OVERSEE POTENTIAL VERDICTS.

>>55294457
You look like the guy that used farts as a substitute last year. Didn´t last long the moron.

>>55294488
And what´s your verdict on the game? I don´t know the other team.

>>55294442
OH NOOOOO~ DONT GO RUNNIN OFF WITH ME NOW!

Rolled 5 (1d20)

>>55294428
Remember, Orcs are more dangerous than goblins!

>>55294442
>>55294512
>The sea-elf runs after through a paper wall for dramatic effect

>>55294457
>Throws a birdy to Aphelion
>Roll is for birdy throw and for possible interception

seriously gentlemen cut it out , s
w

Rolled 2 (1d20)

>>55294506
I've never played, I mostly just do post match analysis.
...and I set the odds for the betting. Because all the other divination mages seem to have run off.
>>55294531
I KNEW YOU WERE GOING TO DO THAT!
>Catch attempt

>>55294506
VERDICT: EVIDENTLY THE BALL HAS BEEN STOLEN BY SOME IDIOT.

THE OTHER TEAM IS COMPOSED OF EXCEPTIONALLY FAST HARPIES. AS SUCH THEY ARE KIND OF DOOMED WHEN COMPETING AGAINST THE TRIED-AND-TRUE TEAM SLOW-MOVING BACTERIA.

>>55294550
>>55294546
>>55294531
Go team...
>she makes sure no one is looking and throws off the stupid pom poms

Rolled 18 (1d20)

>>55294442
Head for the 4th gravity state, that's where all the best cover is, I'll give you covering fire.

>Charges up goblin launcher

>>55294550
Harpies VS Bacteria? That´s unhygeniec fight if I ever saw one.
...
Can I play on Bacterias side?
>Tries to grab the ball or what now counts as ball from somewhere.

Rolled 9 (1d20)

>>55294586
>Uses the diving board to do a triple flip and throw a bomb-kid at the goblin launcer

What the fuck is happening in here right now?
>Suddenly entered

>MEANWHILE THE BALL WORKS ON HEADING TOWARDS ITS OWN GOAL!
I'M ALREADY THROUGH FRESHMAN YEAR OF COLLEGE SUCKERS! LIFE GOALS IS THE REAL PRO STRATEGY!
>>55294570
Psst, I'll give you a knighthood if you write my term paper.

>>55294631
You wouldn't happen to have any undead minions would you? The one issue with a goblin launcher is that it burns through ammo fast.

>>55294652
I don't want to be a pompous knight..
..where is green.
>She looks around, absolutely annoyed.

Rolled 19 (1d20)

>>55294512
Too late monsieur
>a spanish guitar plays in the background when he speaks
Assure you my intentions are honourable

>>55294531
>Fuck that was cool
>in the spirit of one upmanship, Heyzues leaps out a window

>>55294586
My thanks mon amie!

>>55294666
What, you think I just carry around undead all the time?

I mean, I do have undead anyway, but still.

Rolled 8 (1d20)

>>55294609
>>55294600
>>55294586
SELF-CONSENSUS: YOU FOOLS. HAVE YOU NO SKILL IN THIS GAME. NOW IT'S THIS ONE'S TIME TO ACT.

>Omega-Kappa's shade changes from a calm blue to a sinister purple, as red eye markings appear on each of its side! It is surrounded by a miasma of MAGEBALL ENERGY!

MAGEBALL ACTION: CITING RULE 738, THIS ONE SHALL CAST SPEED EXCHANGE. WITH THIS ABILITY THIS ONE WILL SWAP THE SPEEDS OF SLOW-MOVING BACTERIA AND FAST MOVING HARPIES! THIS ONE SHALL SACRIFICE TWELVE EXPENDABLE GOBLINS. THAT SHOULD DO IT, I HOPE...

>>55294691
SELF-CONSENSUS: FUCK. THIS ONE SHOULD HAVE SACRIFICED EIGHT!

>>55294672
Then don't be pompous, idiot. And I do believe your idiot friend is having the time of her life saying something horribly racist to some of her admirers.
>>55294681
Well, I hope you can finish your goal before I finish mine. The 30 second college rush needs absolute perfect timing to pull off.

Rolled 18 (1d20)

>>55294691
Stop stealin' my goblins!

>Makes to retrieve goblins with suction end of the launcher.

Rolled 7 (1d20)

>>55294681
>Glug uses his patented mole technique to chase after Heyzues
>Glug, laying on a sofa and sipping apple juice, is moved by the cheery mole folk carrying his sofa

Rolled 18 (1d20)

>>55294730
SELF-CONSENSUS: SHIT.

>Omega-Kappa's shade shifts to a bright yellow, eye markings becoming orange and with the addition of an angrily furrowed brow.

MAGEBALL ACTION: CITING RULE 54, "NEGATIVE SPELLS CAST BOTH ON YOURSELF AND THE ENEMY WILL NOT REQUIRE USAGE OF EXPENDABLE GOBLINS", THIS ONE CASTS REVERSE MOMENTUM ON BOTH HEYZUES AND THIS ONE'S SELF! WITH THIS PLAY HE WILL BE SENT ROLLING BACK WHILE THIS ONE WILL SIMPLY BEGIN ROTATING IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!

Anonymous ## Mod 2017-09-09 12:27:26 Post No.55294872
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