As my good luck's had it, I've managed to go for almost 15 years of gaming without having to deal with a That Guy. I made sure to always play with people I know, trust, and like, and my gaming buddies were usually my general purpose real life buddies anyway so this was never an issue. Unfortunately, my sister just moved to Massachusetts for her new job and we were missing a player, so another member of the group - my oldest, best, and most trusted friend - brought in an army buddy he vouched for.
Said army buddy... well, the problem is I can't really say he "doesn't work", or something. He's a good player, clearly an intelligent guy, he doesn't do anything bad on purpose. Doesn't disrupt the game itself or anything. However, he's kinda obnoxious and he's got some bad habits. He constantly hits on another player, he takes every opportunity to bring up politics/make stupid political jokes, and a few times already he's had one of those "Why aren't you all laughing/praising me? Can't you see how crazy/edgy/brilliant I am?". You know, the type of dude who always makes sure to show up with a death metal t-shirt with the sleeves just short enough so you could see his dragon tattoos and asks whether clerics and black people get Int penalties.
Like, it's uncomfortable. The other players seem to get along with him mostly fine so long as he doesn't try to hit on them so I'm reluctant to flat out take disciplinary measures, but I don't know the guy so I feel like it'd be impolite to straight out tell him his shit's grating. I dunno, it's a delicate situation. I'm used to players just getting along and being excellent.
Any advice?
>>55190111
Have you tried talking like two adult human beings?
My advice would be to talk about it with your group, and ask them what they think of his behavior, and then discuss with them how it's bumming you out. Once you're sure your group will support you, then talk to the guy about it.
The best way to do it is with a smile and a laugh and say something like, "Hey man, I appreciate your jokes, but maybe save them for when the game is over." I don't know how to word it, because I am not you. But I notice if you do it with a smile and a laugh, they will take it better than if you went up to them seriously. The trick is saying your piece while still keeping the mood of the game going.
If your group agrees with you beforehand, they can support you on your brief confrontation.
Let this go on no longer. The GM has to be a referee. Referees call out troublesome players. They don't brood on it for weeks and then have a big confrontation where they list off all the player's fouls. If something unacceptable is happening at your table, it has to be dealt with then and there.