What do you buy to start your journey? >you have 30 Gold

Sword and 2 health potions

>>55099944
Can I buy the cutie?

>>55099944
Potion of invisibility, steal the rest.

two swords and one heath potion

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>>55099984
Look at what you've done
Now how will she feed her family

>>55100011
I will resell everything at a higher price and give her a 99% cut anonymously.

>>55100011
Is she going to cry?

>>55099954
Correct question.

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>>55100027
She'll need to make money some other way to cover those losses from >>55100011. Of course, her honour would prevent her from accepting a handout, but I'm sure we can come to some form of agreement.

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>>55099954
>>55100027
>>55100052

15 daggers. I'm a rogue of the assassin's guild: I don't need anything else, kid.

>>55100079
okay, give her back half the staff, we only need the glowy bit
we're thieves, but we ain't heartless

We ought to equip two people and send them to a local quest, get some loot, and restock her place with better gear. Granted, we keep the best of the loot.

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>>55100079
Give 100 gold to milady

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>>55100108

>>55100149
Stab her, can't afford to leave any witnesses now.

>>55100149
Can she clean the rusty sword up for a price?

QUEST FAGS LEAVE REEEEEE!

A GOOD GENERAL OR FAPBAIT THREAD DIED FOR THIS.

GO BACK TO YOUR CONTAINMENT BOARD!

WE DON'T WANT YOUR KIND OF FUN HERE!

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>>55100157
Well done...

>>55100149

Give back all the items except for the sword. Give her the gold for that and walk away doing a dance so she is appeased.

>>55100184

Get behind the counter and pretend to be the shop owner. We have to play it cool til close.

>>55100193
Think we should wipe the blood off the wall first. . .
Use the rags she was wearing.

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>>55100184
This was inevitable. Nothing to do now but loot her corpse and run for it.

>>55100199

There is no time for that. Goblins are notoriously screechy. We need to take down the invisibility potion price and body block the wall smear.

>>55100193
>>55100210
WE CAN'T WE'RE INVISIBLE
FUCK
BURN THE SHOP DOWN USING MAGIC

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>>55100186
>>55100193

>>55100218
>WE CAN'T WE'RE INVISIBLE
oh shit

>>55100218

NO SHE SAW US ITS OKAY THE INVIS HAS WORN OFF

Fuck all that. Use the staffy stone to animate the corpse. Command the so blind to run the shop and stay open 24 hours. We have a place to sell loot at full market value, we can get consumables whole sale and we have free,tight goblin pussy any time we want it, just a potion of invigorating warmth mixed with some olive oil away

>>55100218
Let's use the mage staff to turn back time.

>>55100233

This is fine. All we need to do is play it cool. Act casual and everything will blow over.

>>55100233
we can salvage this

just uh

uh

hang the goblin corpse from the sword mount hooks and write FRESH CORPSE over RUSTY SWORD in her blood

>>55100246
Command the zomblin *
Stupid auto correct.

>>55100246
>>55100247

Guys, it's a second-hand staff. It has Magic Missile and Light in it or some shit.

>>55100265
Does it have Fireball?

>>55100255

BEST IDEA DO THIS

People sell corpses all the time!

>>55100233
Jump to >>>/qst/ before the mods nuke this thread

>>55100265
We can use it still. Second someone sees the body pop the staff head like a flashbang and cast Light.

Ain't nobody takin' us!

>>55100270

Of course it doesn't have fucking Fireball. Fireball is a 3rd level spell or some shit. A staff w/ Fireball is a first-hand staff.

>>55100282

We don't have to worry about that because no one is going to notice shit.

We put the body up for sale just like any respectable merchant would.

>>55100292
We're fucked.
Use the healing potions to cover up the wounds and sell the gobo corpse as a sex doll.
It's our only hope.

>>55100292
Maybe it's a low level spell created by a student for practice? It might just have a lot of penalties
>raise dead
>only creatures under 4 feet tall
>must have cute ears
>must have round booty
must be filled with cum once a day or will collapse

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>>55100218
>>55100234
>>55100238
>>55100246
>>55100247
>>55100255
>>55100262
>>55100270
>>55100280
>>55100282
>>55100292
>>55100300
FUCK, YOUR PANICING, ALL YOU WANTED TO DO WAS GO ON A QUEST!!

>>55100281
This wasn't even supposed to be like this, it started as an honest question

>>55100306
OR
OR
We can embark on our EPIC QUEST and attempt to go back in time and stop ourself from killing the gobbo merchant
Then roll to seduce

>>55100306

We aren't fucked and corpse sex doll is too specific to sell. They'll know we are up to something. We just label it as a regular fucking corpse for sale, 10 G and everything is golden.

>>55100316
Put it out!
Pee on it, use goblin blood, spill the potions.. Something!

>>55100316

FUCK WE GOTTA BAIL

GO ON THE QUEST

GET THE FUCK OUT THIS HAS ALL GONE TO SHIT

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>make a silly post about stealing a potion
>close tab
>come back later to see if the thread is still there
>mfw

>>55100316
GO ON THE QUEST IN >>>/qst/ AND THEN DO >>55100318

>>55100327

BLOOD AND POTIONS ARE TERRIBLE FOR PUTTING OUT FIRES JESUS FUCK WE ARE SO BAD AT ADVENTURES

>>55100335

THE FUCKING SHOP IS ON FIRE AND YOU WANT TO GO TO ANOTHER BOARD? WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THAT YOU STUPID FUCK

>>55100316
The best things come about by accident!

Also AAAAAAAAAAAAA

GRAB EVERYTHING WE CAN CARRY AND RUN FOR IT

At least the gobo cops and fire department haven't shown up...

>>55100350
WE'LL COME BACK, OR RATHER, WE'LL HAVE COME HERE BEFORE AND PREVENTED THSI WHOLE SHIT FROM HAPPENING

>>55100354
*gobbo

>>55100357

TIME TRAVEL DOESN'T EXIST

STOP DEALING IN WHAT-IFS AND COME UP WITH SOLUTIONS FOR RIGHT NOW

>>55100366
HENCE WHY WE GO ON THE QUEST

>>55100366
STEAL EVERYTHING AND PRETEND THE GOBLIN WAS OUR WIFE AND WE OWNED THE BUISINESS

>>55100370
Now this is the kind of Oedipan asininity I can get behind!

"I must avenge my wife!"
"Loyal squire, we have journeyed far together... and now I have a confession to make."

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>>55100331
>>55100335
FUCK THIS, YOU GRAB YOUR ZOBLIN AND GTFO

Embarking on your new epic quest!!

tommorow... on /qst/... sometime

>>55100387
Wait!

We burn the Elf Shit down first.

>>55100387
Wait. Don't we have healing potions? how do we know she's not just unconscious?

>>55100387
Quality shit, OP. I'll probably poke around /qst/ tomorrow looking for it.

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>>55100390

>>55099944
Sword and Invisibility Potion. Either I can thief my way out of everything, or fight.

>>55100408
Oh good, now we think about not fleeing through the woods.

>>55100408

This town really should look into guards.

>>55100414
We can also panic our way out of everything.

>>55100419
Maybe we were the guards?

Cast water, give goblin a health potion, drop the money AND RUN.

>>55100416
We have a Zoblin waifu with us, and did you really expect a 4chan hive mind wouldn't kill the first elf we see? Elves were never an option.

>burning houses
>stealing cuties
Are we Vikings yet?

>>55100430
They also killed the first goblin they saw, also it's just a burning house.

>>55100429
>restore health on the gobbo
>this destroys the zomblin waifu
Are you mad?

>>55100424

This town needs to get better guards.

>>55100408
While guards/villagers are dealing with the two fires, steal a horse, travel west as fast as possible.

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>>55100430
>Elves were never an option.

This sounds like the opening line to a really great game, anon.

...did we leave the Goblin kids to burn?

Goddamit, /tg/
Can't you even manage one (1) shopping episode without setting everything on fire?

>>55100883
Yes. But unfortunately we can't manage a trip to the gobbo pawn shop without some of that delicious green apple poon.

>>55100911

Don't try to deflect shit onto poon. You always light the store on fire.

>>55099952
fpbp

>>55100926
That reminds me of a sorcerer character I had who gained the title "Tavernbane" due to his habit of using fire spells in barfights, leading to exploding alcohol and angry innkeepers a lot of the time. He even tried to take someone down with a "non-lethal fireball" at one point. That didn't end well.