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Why do you pretend to dislike elves, /tg/?

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Why do you pretend to dislike elves, /tg/?
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>>54942767
What exactly is the difference between humans and elves?

They are just boring
>>
>>54942767
The insecure are intimidated by their superiors. Traditionally speaking elves are objectively superior to humans.
>>
>>54942767
Because they're boring and everywhere
>>
>>54942767
they are kind of faggy
>>
>>54942767
I like Lizardfolk more, am indifferent to elves but humans usually have a better racial in RPGs.
>>
Repetitive threads of any kind get abrasive.
>>
>>54942767
That's not an elf you mong.
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>>54942767
Didn't we just have the daily elf shitposting thread, that thankfully got deleted? Your second is not a worthier contribution to this boards overall quality.
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>>54942767
i think ill need sauce.
For... science things, yeah.
>>
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Obligatory
>>
I consider myself elf neutral. It really annoys me when people go out of there way to make them weird unrelateable shit though
>>
>>54942891
You keep responding.
And quit spamming Mar while you shitpost.
>>
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>>54942916
Luthandriel speaks the truth, after a while sex just gets boring and elves live for millennia.
Talking about stars is probably they closest he can get to an erection.
>>
>>54942928
>You keep responding
And so does everyone else, so me not responding doesn't matter.
>>
>>54942767
I don't, I like them.
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>>54942804
The length
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>>54942767
I'm a full-blown unironic elf-fag, don't attempt to speak for me.
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I have an actual fetish for pointy ears. Catgirls also do it for me, but I literally can't get it up for anything that doesn't have them.
>>
>>54942767
I don't, I play dark eldar
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>>54942767
I don't dislike them, I'm just tired of them. I was around for the boom in the 90s and early 00s when there were a hundred thousand varieties of elves all over the place in every setting. Sky elves, cloud elves, winged elves, high elves, low elves, middle elves, swamp elves, sea elves, ocean elves, water elves, dark elves, shadow elves, cave elves, wood elves, forest elves, tree elves, leaf elves, dirt elves, earth elves, ground elves, mountain elves, hill elves, plains elves, light elves, sun elves, moon elves, star elves, magic elves, and so on and so forth into infinity. And each and every variety of them is better than humans at everything, because of course they are.

Everyone had to make their own fucking snowflake elves that were different (but not really) from all the others. In my heart, there are and always will be only two kinds of elves, ever: high elves and wood elves.
>>
>>54942767
I don't. Elves are fantastic. I prefer playing elves to humans. I think that may be my autism making them more relatable/interesting than they are for most people.

Half orcs, gnomes, and halflings are shit though. They can get fucked.

Human
High elf
Wood elf
Drow
Hill dwarf
Mountain dwarf
Duergar
Derro
Hobgoblin
Bugbear
Goblin
Mountain orc
Orog
Thayan orc
Grey orc

Much better list.
>>
>>54942767
it's fun to be pretend racist
>>
>>54943210
>elves over gnomes
Gnomes have a more interesting difference to dwarves than elves do to humans. My opinion is fact.
>>
>>54942892
Warning; you're not going to like it.
wakfuta academy
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>>54942767
>>
>>54943288
>futa
This is even better than I tought.
Thanks anon, +10 internets for you.
>>
>>54942767
Elves are icky
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If Elves we're real, a bunch of people would fetishize them, but a fuckton of people would hate them by virtue of them being inhuman. Xenophobia combined with a possible inferiority complex.

All in all /tg/ has both responses so it's reasonable.
>>
>>54943380
>we're
Goddamn phoneposting
>>
>>54942827
Stupid meme runs contrary to all the elves I can think of on fiction.


Here, have some examples:
Araevin teshurr
Seiveril miritar
Fflar starbrow melruth
Legolas
Nuada
Nuala
I level miritar
Elaith craulnober
Amnestria moonflower
Amlaruil moonflower
Kymil nimesin
Zaor moonflower
Durothil

So, what kind of bitch ass elves are you talking about?
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I like them.
I want them to sit on my face.
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>>54943600
Is legolas inferior because of his living much longer than humans, or his superior senses and dexterity?
>>
>>54943684
What, neither.

>>54942827
Oh. Fuck my reading comprehension. That'll teach me to skim.
I was listing elves who are not insecure or intimidated by their superiors, but confident and capable of standing behind their decisions.
>>
>>54942767
Same reason I pretend to dislike huge breasted blonde girls at the beach. Sour grapes.
>>
>>54943775
I read the "the" as "they" and thought dude made an editing error and missed the subsequent "are".

>>54942827
>The insecure are intimidated by their superiors. Traditionally speaking elves are objectively superior to humans.
I read it as:
>They are insecure are intimidated by their superiors, even though traditionally speaking elves are objectively superior to humans.
Hence my refuting that elves are meek little bitches.
>>
>>54943799
Why would you want to have giant tits, bro?
>>
>>54943890
How else am I going to have giant tits in my life?
>>
>>54943775
>>54943843
Fair enough, I'm honestly glad that's a misunderstanding because it's apparent that you know far more than I do about elves in this context, I didn't know like 75% of that list. Thought I was about to get embarrassed on the internet again.
>>
>>54942767
The context of that image isn't questioning elves and you know it.
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>>54942767
I pretend to dislike elves because I dislike elves.
>>
>>54943912
You take out a big-bosomed girl out for a nice date
>>
>>54944036
The shared character flaw of elves is that they're overconfident and arrogant, and prone to underestimating their nonelven opponents (not that they're cowardly and meek, because they're definitely not that)

But I disagree with the assertion that they're objectively superior to humans, for that reason. I find them more interesting than everyday stock humans, but they're not objectively superior.
>>
>>54944036
>>54944393
That racist superiority complex (hubris) , and a lot of squabbling and infighting which leaves them distracted and vulnerable, and overthinking problems when immediate action is necessary, are the problems with elves. They're awesome, and they let it go to their heads.

Frankly I don't understand how anybody doesn't find elves more interesting than boring everyday humans.
>>
>>54944492
Generally

Elves
>live in woods
>archery
>pretentious
>spooky magic

Whereas humans
>live everywhere
>use anything
>generally nice
>spooky magic

Generally elves are just kind of "meh"
>>
>>54942767
I HAVE MY REASONS
>>
>>54942767
Cause >>54943600 >>54943775 >>54943843 are the kind of people who like elves.
>>
Name ONE setting in which Elves aren't assholes.

>LotR
Assholes

>Warcraft
Assholes

>TES
Gigantic fucking assholes
>>
>>54944393

Nah. That's an incredibly common flaw in fantasy. Hell, it's probably the most common trait for sapients.

The problem with evles is that they don't "think" they are better than humans: they are. Shit should be re-defined taking that into account.
>>
>>54945334
The only thing better with elves is a higher lifespan and better dexterity

Give me a team of geneticists and 2000 years and we can make humanity far better than elves
>>
>>54945383

Sigh.

Anon, I meant in fiction.

More beautiful, more wise, more attuned ot nature, more magical.
>>
>>54945415
Who gives a crap about nature.

For their long lifespans and "superiority" elves sure don't do a lot
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>>54945268
I hate you because I can't disagree with you.
>>
>>54945445
D&D says Elves don't reach maturity for 100+ years.
>20-30 years of potty training
>60-80 years of whining screaming CRAWLING IN MY SKIIIIIN angst
>>
>>54945066
>live in the woods.

Wood elves stick to the woods. That's why they're called wood elves.

Elves: stuff to make them interesting.
Humans: bland modern day american personalities.

>>54945218
Because people who like elves skim stuff and miss details sometimes? You're gonna need to explain why that matters, anon.

>>54945268
Faerun? The asshole elves exist, but are the minority.
You could argue also the witcher. The local elves are fine, better people than the humans, in a shitty world. The wild hunt elves are assholes.
>>
>>54945881
Humans don't need different races like ice humans.

The humans who live in the north typically have their own culture, whereas snow elves are just elves but cold
>>
>>54942767
Because I'll never be drowned in slender cow-titted nympho elves. It hurts, anon.
>>
>>54942767
I'm just honestly bored with generic fantasy races as a whole. 20+ years of playing and running games will do that.
>>
>>54945268
I hate knife ears just as much as the next guy, but the high elves in lotr are pretty based, in the end.
>>
>>54942767
I don't dislike elves. I dislike elves drawn with disgusting animu horizontal pig ears.

Enjoy your Oinkers.
>>
>>54943380
That's what I was thinking about the xenophobia, and I would think that would also apply to monstergirls.

>>54945066
>>humans
>generally nice
Humans are usually either hostile or want to fuck your ass. Seldom are there generally nice ones.

>>54945483
Slow maturity is generally seen as a liability in survival unless you can make up for it with development potential. Humans mature slowly because they have brains that trade instinct for knowledge absorption and retaining, also the fact that big heads are really hard to give birth to, so it is all made easier by having the baby start off dumb.

>>54947204
Anime elves are heresy that is made to pander to otakus. See shit like >>54942937
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>>54945445
What about that one time they started a reality altering war to retrieve some magic gems of fuckwad, which ended with Beleriand being slammed into the sea by the Valar?

Fucking Feanor.
>>
>>54946363
You only need 4 kinds of elves.

Wood.
High.
Aquatic.
And Drow.

The cultural differences are the reason.
>>
>>54948004
They are also physically distinct.

Woodelves are your hearty nature types. High elves are your frail intellectual magic using type.
The aquatic ones breathe water instead of air. And only come up in an aquatic or seafaring campaign.
And Drow are stealthy assassin types with infra vision and magic.

Theyre both physically distinct and culturally distinct.

If you have humans living under water, they're gonna be more than "a different culture".
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But anon, I love elves
>>
>>54942989
>you will never give oral sex to a smoking hot three thousand year old elf while they gaze at the stars through a telescope and teach you about cold fusion
>>
>>54943107
I'm just curious, but do you get it up for vulcans? What about ferengi?
>>
>>54945066
>Humans
>Nice
Half the time they're genocidal xenophobes who do nothing but kill other races
>>
>>54942989
You see, this is why dark elves exist. Eventually the vanilla stuff gets boring so they get into other stuff. Other stuff leads to light bondage, light bondage leads to BDSM, BDSM leads to hard BDSM, and hard BDSM leads to... Whatever you call that.
>>
>>54942767
The only acceptable kind of elf is the Harlequins. I love my clownpussi.
>>
>>54945268
>LotR
Elves are the objective good guys in that. Sure there are some moments of dwarf levels of greed and pettiness but not a single elf has ever served Sauron.

>Warcraft
K

>TES
Only the Thalmor and Ayleids could be considered assholes and even then they're not assholes. Half of the Ayleids helped the humans before being killed in Alessian order pogroms. The Thalmor also aren't that bad from an objective standpoint, they only want peace on Tamriel.
>>
>>54945483
That's how long it takes them to become physically mature, but that doesn't mean they remain infantile for their entire lives.

Drizzt was old enough to begin his weapons training when he was only ten years old.

And he was already considered a young adult by humans when he reached the surface around the age of 60.
>>
>>54948056
Magic humans with crazy spells

That's a pretty distinct culture.

Why did they move there?
Why do they live there?
What is their architecture like?

With water elves it's like, I dunno they have gills.

Humans have to deal with other climates through ingenuity, elves deal with other climates by being totally different races than elves.

I mean why even have elves in the first place, just have a bunch of different races that fill the same shoes but are unique
>>
>>54948145
But that's a Harvin.
>>
>>54948056
You're forgetting that in a setting with elves, there's also bound to be fucking magic.

They are all the exact same species, as well as race. The differences exist only because of magic. Not genetics. Humans can use spells to breathe water instead of air. Does that make them a different species? No. It makes them able to use magic.

Elves just figured out a way to first make it permanent on themselves. Then figured out a way to pass the magic on to their biological children.

Find a way to strip off all those layers of inherited magics from a Drow, and they will be indistinguishable from any other elf "race".
>>
>>54948348
This, in order to adapt humans use and create tools to alter their environment.

In order to adapt Elves use magic to alter themselves.
>>
>>54948301
>Elves are the objective good guys in that. Sure there are some moments of dwarf levels of greed and pettiness but not a single elf has ever served Sauron.

Yes, because evil elves are called Orks in setting. If they flip to evil, they're no longer called an Elf.
>>
>>54948301
>No elf joined sauron
Sauron was an elf.
>>
>>54948523
Actually Sauron merely took the form of an elf because he desired perfection and that was the closest thing possible.

>>54948449
>Orks
What's that? Some type of fungi?
>>
>>54948449
>Orks
Fuck right off.
>>
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>>54942767
> they got that meat on them
>totally kills by boner.
>>
>>54942767
I like elves. A lot.
>>
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Drow autism is best autism.
>>
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>>54942767
I never claimed to dislike elves. The ones with chocolate filling are fine by me.
>>
>>54945483
no on the potty training, that's just learning the skill of bowel control, probably would happen just as fast as human (eh, maybe not quite as fast, humans do pick up skills quicker than most races, but close enough. We're talking months not decades)

Probably correct about the angst though, given that's more hormonal and neurodevelopmental.
>>
>>54948966
To be fair, if there's anything Lolth loves more than spiders its making her worshippers suffer and be dependent on her, so they can't escape the suffering.

Seeing as how Dirzzt caused that in spades, and making him her champion is salt in the wound, I can't really see her NOT doing it.
>>
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>>54949818
>Drizzt didn't escape to the surface
>the surface is just where Lolth stores her ultimate weapon of PURE DROW AUTISM
>this way he stays nice and fresh for when she needs him
>>
>>54945483
110 is 15-ish according to 3.5 materials, so I wouldn't say "young adult." Preteen is closer.

>>54948312
mmmm. There's no way those map to human years in any sensible x:1 ratio then. Because you'd probably start sword training around 5? so that's a x2. But max 750 vs max 100... definitely not x2...

The only way I'm seeing this working is if Elves are born even more prematurely than humans are, and have a proportionally much longer childhood. Like human/dog years.

Tinkering with the stage of life age numbers in the PHB to find a line of best fit confirms my suspicions. Childhood is about 1/3th the average lifespan to human's 1/5th, and are definitely birthed less developed than humans.

Of note, while as best I can guess most don't live past 400ish, just like most humans don't live past 80ish, an elf of particularly long life might spend nearly half his life in the crippling grind of venerability, while the equivalent human would have only spent about 1/3.


As for interesting conclusions of the (relatively premature birth, In order for a mother to bear and externally carry around what is essentially a fetus for several years... I can only assume elves must be some kind of marsupials? Which... makes sense if you squint hard enough, I guess?
>>
>>54942767
That's not an elf. That's a human.
>>
>>54951052
>pointed ears
(((human)))
>>
>>54950518
That's basically what happened in the latest book I read. Demogorgon is going to fuck shit up, so Matron Baenre, now in Quenthel's body and possibly avatar of Lolth, hatches a plot to bring Drizzt back to Menzoberrazan. Once he's there he gets tortured for a bit then sent in the caverns where big D dwells. Drizzt actually does the smart thing and runs away back to town, where Kimmuriel puts a kinetic barrier on him followed by every mage and crossbow shooting Drizzt with everything they have, followed by Drizzt stabbing Demogorgon and unleashing all the accumulated energy. He's literally the savior of Drow civilization and Lolth's champion.
>>
>>54951079
Cra are canonically human.
>>
>>54947539
>Humans are usually either hostile or want to fuck your ass. Seldom are there generally nice ones.
It's sad you think that's true. There are scores of people working everyday to help the less fortunate.
>>
>>54951260
Everyone doing a good honest day's work in general is a good person you fucking asshole.
>>
>>54943280
your opinion is shit
>>
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>>54942767
>implying
>>
>>54945268
>LotR
>Assholes
have you only watched the films?
Because in the films they skipped all the parts where the elves jokes around and are fun and made them much haughtier than they were in the books
>>
>>54951839
those were different elves.
>>
>>54952017
no, all the elves loved to joke and play around.
in the movies they gave elves the personality of dwarves and dwarves the personality of elves.
Dwarves were the ceremonious stuck up ones, sticklers for rank and roles, while elves tended to love to play around but were more detached due to their nature of being half physical half spiritual creatures
>>
>>54952039
Nah, pretty sure Thranduil's ilk were always jerks.
>>
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I don't mind female elves, because elves embody all the traits that we end up likening to being feminine. Dainty artists who drink lots of wine and eat vegetarian food, focused on speechcraft and finesse.

On a woman, that's a feminine woman. On a man, that's a fruit.
>>
>>54952089
they weren't jerks, they were just suspicious because they lived in a dangerous area
>>
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>>54952146
>posting bit titted animu elf that basically doesn't exist in the settings we play around here
I see, you are an expert on this topic. How about not basing your views on elves on pics you masturbate to on gelbooru, since you can actually find elves in fantasy that are badass. Also vegan elves are a meme, they barely exist.
>>
>Me magic bigger than hummies
>We wuz kings n' shiet
>Hummies ruin da world
>>
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>>54950996
You are so fucking retarded. It's magic. Quit making it more complicated than it needs to be.
>>
>>54952146
>Dainty artists who drink lots of wine and eat vegetarian food

Where the fuck did this meme come from?
>>
anime ruined elves
>>
>>54953582
What hasn't Japan ruined for western civilization?
>>
>>54953582
other way around
elf´s ruined anime
>>
>>54953582
Hentai ruined elves, anime just makes barebones copies.
>>
>>54942767
I don't. Elves are my favorite
>>
>>54953582

Worse than Drizzt?
>>
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>>54952208
Bitch plwase, Warhammer elves are for sexual.

Murder afterwards, but sexual first.
>>
>>54942937
So how do the elves reproduce, with humans?
>>
>>54942767
GM was a dick, every time an elf turns up shit goes bad. I have survived 3 party deaths that were caused by elves and the fucking dark elves torture my favourite character and send him up as an enemy when I think he died.

good games but I just cant stand them after that.
>>
>>54952146
Uh, anon, where I come from (europe), elves are vicious feuding bastards who'll often kill you as soon as look at you, but only once they're bored of playing horrible practical jokes on you, your wife, your family, and your little dog too.

Except for the nice elves. They'll usually let you go after if they thought your flailing in their web was amusing enough.

Your daughter is still going to be a changeling now though.
>>
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>draw an elf
>call it a human
For what purpose?
>>
>>54942767
Most of /tg/ consists of fat neckbeard manlets who self-insert as dwarves.
>>
>>54945483
You got that wrong.

100 is ther ''legal age'' when they are considered adults by society.

Elves are physically adults at 21.
So you got only the part where they have 80 years of teen angst right.
>>
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>>54953711
So you are deliberately ommissing all the badass male elves, probably because you don't care about their lore when you can't masturbate to them. Elf-masturbators are the worst elf-"fans"
>>
>>54942767
Most people that use 4chan are bitter lonely overweight "men". The idea of elves make them insecure and they start screeching autistically.
>>
>>54954020
Male elves are sex gods too. Slightly less likely to kill you, though.
>>
>>54943107
...Is that a tentacle monster disguised as an elf?
>>
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>>54954020
>heh, he doesn't like fapping to guys
>that makes him inferior
>>
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>>54951260
If only you knew how bad things really are.
>>
>>54945268
>LotR
>Assholes

This is the opinion of plebs who have only seen the shitty Hobbit films. Elves are very much the good guys in Arda.

>Warcraft
>Assholes

Honestly, I don't remember much about Warcraft, but none of the elves ever seemed like assholes. The Night Elves were fine doing their thing and the High Elves seemed like good allies and friends with the other races.

>TES
>Gigantic fucking assholes

Almost everyone is a huge asshole in that setting. Only the Thalmor are really 'bad', even the Ayleids weren't intrinsically awful, and the Thalmor have pretty good reason to see humanity as a plague.
>>
>>54944492
Because a boring, everyday human can start out "not awesome" and then develop into "awesome." It's called a character arc.
>>
>>54943069
and the girth
>>
>>54948449
1. There's nothing called an ork in LotR.

2. Orcs being 'fallen' elves is something Tolkien quibbled over, and either way, it wouldn't be elves who chose to turn to Sauron, but rather those that have been stolen away and twisted by Morgoth's corrupting essence.
>>
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Because they're usually very long living and elitist.

Personally I prefer my immortal betters to have a little more tragic class about them.
I don't think theres any setting where elves are definitively likable, perhaps too much damage has been done for me.
>>
>>54942767
I don't.

But the female ones should all deepthroat dicks constantly with their ears being used as handlebars.

Itsjustscience.gif
>>
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>>54954341
Actually, she's part dragon and not an Elf at all.

That's Yorshka from Dark Souls 3, if you want to go find out more.
>>
>>54955019
>no Priscilla covenant in the first game
>not!Priscilla covenant in the second game
They redeemed themselves alright.
>>
>>54954435
Warcraft elves are kind of assholes. They only helped humans during the second war because the orcs were also attacking their lands, then immediately fucked off and closed their borders when the immediate threat was over. While Garithos from WC3 was little more than a strawman character to justify Kael'thas joining forces with Illidan, he had a reason for hating elves, namely that he felt they refused to do anything to help humans recover from the damages of the war or dealing with the plague, instead just isolating themselves from the rest of the world again as soon as they could.

Also, blood elves are almost universally assholes, and night elves were pretty assholish back when they still ruled the world (also, pretty muche evrything wrong on Azeroth can be traced to queen Azhara trying to summon Sargeras, the lord of the Burning Legion himself, because she craved his big burning cock).
>>
>>54942767
Because I've already seen you naked.
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>>54954636
That's lewd!
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>>54955061
>tfw I killed Priscilla in Dark Souls 1
>tfw I killed Yorshka for her chime in 3
>tfw the guilty pay the price
>>
>>54955068
Whenever there is someone that wants to degrade elves, there is always some anime-elf fag ready to give him ammunition.
>>
>>54955120
what about if someone wants to kill/enslave the elves? whos there then?
>>
>>54942804

You can't rape an elf
>>
>>54955120
animafags ruin everything everywhere, starting from anime.
>>54955206
the flames of hell as only the servants of the dark lord are interested in such things
>>
>>54955257
then I guess I'm going to hell

UMBUBU BRING MY ELF GUN
>>
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Depends on the setting, but the general go to of narcissistic, tree hugging, isolationists with a fetish for telling you how great their ancient civilization once was, seems pretty hard to enjoy hanging out with.
>>
How do I make an elf fit in a band of brigands, mercenaries, and low-lives?
>>
>>54955328
according to /tg/, as a slave
>>
>>54942767
They're special snowflakes about how great their specific breed of elf is best.
Its Tumblr genders but for subspecies.
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>>54955470
A-cheers
>>
>>54955328
>>54955470
A cock slave
>>
>>54955470
>>54955533
you disgust me, you truly do. you would give quarter to these filthy beings. and let them defile your superior forms. EXECUTE THEM I say, may we exterminate them all.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1CQ7Vwz8Eo
>>
>>54942767
I don't mind elves I simply would prefer a race more dominating in terms of presence and morality. A race of 7 foot humanoids who conquer massive empires and subjugate other race in order to show their superiority is my ideal race.
>>
>>54955328
Raised amongst them?

Took a series of choices in life that lead to them doing so, maybe they're a thrill seeker? Elves still have personality and are as pliable as any other race. Why does someone become a brigand, mercenary or low life? The answer won't be all that different for an elf.
>>
>>54947165
Indeed. But you kind of undercut that sentiment when you use a scene exclusive to the movie.
Legolas was the only elf at Helms Deep.
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>>54955120
I'm here for you, anonymous.
>>
I don't, I like elves.
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>>54955328
Make that one eyed terrorist from Witcher 2
>>
>>54942767
I don't. They are fine, usually. Eldar, elves, wild walkers, tuatha... If they aren't Hel Vanir. Fuck Helheim Vanir.
>>
>>54956106
I'm sorry, but I must ask you why.

are you brain controlled, have you never met the devils?
>>
>>54955328
his elf town was destroyed by whatever enemy you wish to use when he was young, he ended up a vagrant, had to do bad things to survive, other elves didn't want him for that, humans chased him as a criminal, he ended up joining or forming his own band of brigands, mercenaries, low-lives
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>>54955328
What flavor of elf?

Nigh-immortal Tolkienites?
D&D races?
Anime-style, super-long eared, easily flustered ero-bait?
Dragon Age style, short, basically just humans with a chip on their shoulder?
Or one of the thousand flavors of "My elves are different?"

Because the answer differs for each.
>>
>>54955328
The elf is several thousand years old. As such, he is going through his "rebellious teen phase."
He's just out to have a little fun for a few centuries before his parents realize he snuck out of the house.
>>
>>54955328
Kicked out of his home for whatever reason; former prisoner of war; went out of his home and took the life of mercenary work to pay debts or something else; his territory was conquered by another nation of elves or other races, which caused the elf and his family to lose status, etc.
>>
>>54948277
Bloodsports.
>>
Elves in my world are adrenaline junkies.

I tend to use all-human settings, but I have used elves once or twice. I like to play up the immortality (or near immortality) angle.
An elf can spend 10,000 years in their home kingdom and never be surprised, never have a bad day, and never realizing time has passed. They get along with everyone, know everyone else, and barely notice the humans and other non-immortal beings they sometimes meet. An elf can have a human as a house guest until they die of old age and sometimes not realize something is wrong until a decade later. The dreamlike nature of their existence is part of what keeps them immortal.

However, when an elf leaves home, by choice or by force, or if something manages to cause a major change at home (such as an orc or dragon attack), the elves sort of "wake up."
Every new experience and activity is a drug-like high.
Traveling and seeing new places. Meeting new people. Trying new foods. Actually suffering from things like pain and hunger and loss.
All of this is extremely engrossing for the elf. They pursue such experience with a dedication humans find frightening.

An elf doesn't mind being a slave for a few hundred years. The humiliation of subservience to lesser beings is a thrill.

And elf can learn to love being a bandit or a brigand, fighting daily to get enough food to survive until tomorrow. Struggling to live makes life worth living.

Helping some humans set up and empire can be fun.

An elf can fall in love, feel as though they are dying of depression when that love is lost, and wallow in self pity for years.

However, in the end, an eternity of new experiences will eventually just become another prison of sameness. A universe of chaos is uniformly chaotic, and is therefore orderly.
Eventually the elf will return home. They don't forget their memories, but they become lost in the endless nest of repetition.

Most races think elves are fucked up.
>>
>>54955533
But he's a guy elf, guys can't be cock slaves
>>
>>54956167
>have you never met the devils?
thankfully no, but I'm preparing for that day
>are you brain controlled
wearing a skullcap lined with lead specifially to avoid this, you never know when mindflayer will come
>>
>>54956628
you sir, you are blessed to not meet these fiends. may you stay that way

>>54956521
you......I like you. very very good ideas. if only they were not elves. but this idea makes them seem.......... usable without hate and contempt
>>
>>54942989
But then why does the elf's grandmother seem so willing to have sex with a random human? She obviously hasn't gotten bored of it, and she must have been around a long time.
>>
>>54956717
elves are a lewd race
>>
>>54956562
The cock renders then into a female elf (male).
>>
>>54956521
They damn are. Can I use that stuff you have here, good sir?
>>
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>>54956972
Go for it.
It's not like I could stop you even if I wanted to.
>>
>>54957000
You could. By saying "No, you can't." I'm weird, I know. Nice trips
>>
I think one of the underlying themes of Elves vs Humans in fiction, even if people don't reference it directly, is that while Elves are oftentimes individually "superior" to humans in a lot of ways, Humans as a collective culture kind of kick their pasty asses, even if Elves insist this isn't the case.

Generally speaking Humans as communities and societies expand to interact with much more of the world than Elves do, and develop more diverse, independent cultures based on regional assimilation (something Elves are much less prone to), which in an objective sense suggests that Humans have far more predisposition to absorbing and participating in a wider variety of cultures, making them more "cultured" than Elves, in spite of what the knife-ears may insist.

Furthermore, in spite of being oftentimes an older race, Elves innovate very little in a lot of settings, relative to their age-span, and while this is justified by them claiming to like classic art and culture, or taking more time to perfect their crafts, etc. etc., the reality is that humans have a key trait that Elves typically don't: Ambition.

Some settings (D&D included in a lot of cases) really don't actually care to accentuate these features in a lot of cases, and in these cases I often just think of Elves as another race of Humans, because that's what they wind up being; but in their defense, this is true of a lot of other fantasy races in D&D (and other settings) as well; where in order to appeal to a broader audience, the personalities and designs of humanoid, player-focused races are similar enough to what we recognize as "Human" that they might as well be.
Sci-fi doesn't escape this, either.
>>
>>54942767
Because I will never be able to fuck them
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My elves are nearly extinct. Some human alchemists discovered a way to distill a potion of youth from elf blood, leading to a generations (for the humans, at least) long war of genocide.
The only surviving elves are those who got really, really good at hiding, the slaves kept by the super-rich as status symbols, and the offspring of (mostly failed) breeding programs designed to keep those potions in production.

Totally stole the idea from [spoilers]Dark Crystal[/spoilers], of course.
>>
>>54942804
>They are just boring
Because you're playing boring games in boring settings.
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>>54942767
>pretend
>>
>>54942767
You misunderstand, I don't dislike elves, I love them. I take care of my elves, feed them, clothe them, shelter them, make them, and eat them.
>>
>>54956096
Why are anime elves always such sluts?
>>
>>54955310
Well Whites are indeed like that these days...
>>
>>54958131
They aren't, you will have trouble finding any anime elf girl that truly is a slut. Please don't bestupid and bring up porn
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>>54942767
I don't.

Any Elgi who can Gorog and swing an az is fine.
>>
>>54948523
Maiar are not elves, you dumb fuck
>>
>>54955328
Dragon Age Origins and Witcher did it fine
>>
>>54942767

It's a hate boner.

Most people wanna rape elves because they're both beautiful and need to be taken down a peg.
>>
>>54947204
>I don't dislike elves. I dislike elves drawn with disgusting animu horizontal pig ears.
If you hate Poison Elves you need to get the fuck off /tg/.
>>
>>54958465
Only if you are an edgefag, most is an exaggeration, since most people have normal self-esteem and don't feel triggered by a fictional race.
>>
>>54958507

Of course most people have normal self-esteem. Normal is dictated by the average. But the normal here is at least partially self-denigrating. Which is why we want to rape elves (specifically, haughty elves).
>>
>>54958641
You say "we", but I will never be convinced that it's not just a vocal minority of ugly little creature reeeing about a fictional race on an anonymous chinese cartoon board, plus some fags jumping on the meme-wagon.
>>
>>54958715

I don't give two shits about regular elves, anon. I just want to hatefuck the haughty ones.

Some people just get it in their heads that all elves are haughty.
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>>54942767
I genuinely hate elves because they are boring, overused, and do not fit my ideals of beauty while a select few try to claim they are the objectively hottest things ever, when there are many things more attractive than them.
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>>54958838
Did I say anything about regular elves or haughty ones? Learn to hold a conversation.
>>
>>54954613
Of the ears?
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>>54953876
>Most of /tg/ consists of fat neckbeard manlets who self-insert as dwarves.
I'm a leatherworker, carpenter, historian and scribe from a family of brewers and smiths (respectively gun, black, and copper). I grew up in a lumberjacking town on the side of a mountain - on top of one of the largest traps volcanoes in the world. I'm married to a five-foot pot-smoking bearded lady with hairy feet and a fetish for gingers with axes (which I am). What the fuck else am I supposed to identify as, if not an (admittedly tall) dwarf?

As far as people hating on Elves... Pre-Tolkien, if you asked the average peasant what modern movie best represented Elves interacting with humans? They'd probably point to "The Hills Have Eyes". Or "American Gods".
>>
>>54942767
Because 1d4chan told me it's the best mene to use to fit in around here.
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>>54958205
How are we defining slut?
>>
>>54958915
Tolkien elves are like the Tuatha de Dannan crossed over with Norse elves and with a hearty serving of Christian theology stuffs, so they're closer to some interpretations that predate the Fair Folk
>>
>>54946363
>Humans don't need different races like ice humans
You mean like Nord, Redguard, Breton, and Imperial?
>>
>>54959047
First by not posting a gun.
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>>54958899
>He says, posting an DC comics elf
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>>54955099
What was Yorshka's crime?
>>
>>54959138
The gun is an elf.
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They keep raiding my fridge at midnight and budding off clones.
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>>54959206
______No______
>>
>>54959237
>Finns
>Not elfs
I don't believe you
>>
>>54959209
This is fucking nasty, you should feel bad.
>>
>>54959413
Finland is not real.
>>
>>54959413
This meme is ebin and all, but ______No______
>>
>>54948382
The different races of elves (excluding Drow) existed before the dawn of recorded history.

And of those, only the wood elves and the avariel (winged elves) are native to the world. The rest immigrated.

Whether it was through selective breeding or genetic manipulation using magic is neither spelled out nor relevant.

Drow are as closely related to wood elves as mastiffs are to pomeranians.

Strip the inherited magic off of the Drow and they're not Drow anymore, they're funny looking high elves (dark elves). Such creatures are already a minority elven race in the forgotten realms.

Humans would live under water with tools that can fail, only because our genetic engineering isn't good enough to change ourselves.

Elves, under the same circumstances, would probably enact a high magic ritual altering the fundamental nature of their species in order to survive in the new environment. This distinction only means the elves in this instance have better tools.
>>
>>54959539
Well sure, just like the far courts
>>54959541
Oh I get it now, you're trying to protect the secret of Finland.
>>
>>54953782
>three billion names for the same vague malicious baby stealing mischief spirits.
Mythology needs more creativity.
>>
>>54959622
Nah, and fuck your shitty meme and whoever started it.
>>
>>54958915
>I'm a leatherworker, carpenter, historian and scribe from a family of brewers and smiths (respectively gun, black, and copper). I grew up in a lumberjacking town on the side of a mountain - on top of one of the largest traps volcanoes in the world. I'm married to a five-foot pot-smoking bearded lady with hairy feet and a fetish for gingers with axes
you know all these could describe the Noldor? they were taught by the god of smithing and metalworking, the same god who made the dwarves.
Except the hairy feet, that's a Hobbit trait, not dwarvish.
>>
>>54953847
They called them hylians, anon.

>>54953963
Depends on the setting.

>>54954066
Hahaha. Yeah, that's probably accurate.

>>54954515
>character arc
You don't need to start out boring to have one of those. And you can only fit so many character arcs in a story, you can't give them to all the extras.
Also, it's called variety.

>>54956865
Only in shitty porn.
>>
>>54959666
Fae Court Internet Defense Force pls go
>>
The more I play games, the more I realize that humans are literally the only race you need.

Why have wood elves when you could just have forest barbarians.

Why have high elves when you could just have normal human jerks.

Why have drow when you could just have really pale humans.

In fact watching the tactics of people change due to circumstances is infinitely more fun, the just "lol, they have gills"
>>
>>54956106
I'm a pretty faced dexfag IRL, so I find them easier to related to than dorfs.
>>
>>54959778
That's all you got, more nonsense?
>>
>>54959782
Why even use humans? We just play with vague, nondescript blobs as the only playable race, enemy race, terrain, form of governance, and currency
>>
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I don't hate elves, I hate that players don't know how to play them/design elves that aren't Dirk 'Edgemaster' Lonewolf.

So I ban their creation/existence in my games. It just makes for a better experience.
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>>54948145
That's a potato
>>
>>54959085
>Lotr
>videogame

How can you type when you clearly can't read?
>>
>>54959822
You can have other races, but the funky forehead and ear races need to stop.

Aliens need to be alien enough to be unique
>>
I liked Night elves in WC3 when they were savage warrior women

Now they're just gay and generic
>>
>>54959782
If an entire race can be completely summed up like that, without even another nation of the same race but different society, then you're right, there is no point for non-humans.
>>
>>54959890
It's more that the nature of aliens must be sufficiently different from humanity so that the conditions of that alien's existence may be examined.
Instead of just making the aliens "humanity but different" as a metaphor for examining some aspect of humanity itself.

This is going to be complicated because we're writing from a human perspective. How are we supposed to find and adopt a truly alien perspective when all we have to examine is humanity as a model?
Some would argue that it is impossible, and I see the full merits of that argument. How can we as humans conceive of something that is wholly non-human?
moreover, the basic requirements and needs of life probably do actually mean that aliens are not wholly alien to humanity, because the same basic elements of survival instinct still exist. It's kind of like the old 1800s-1900s idea of "finding new colors" because the knowledge of how the visible spectrum works had not been dispersed yet
>>
>>54960042
Lovecraft did a great job of making aliens unique, and semi-relatable
>>
>>54959782
Elves are like the ONLY standard fantasy race you can't make this argument for. If you hold this problem to elves, it just means that you're a shitty player with a shitty DM. By default, elves are mystical and nigh immortal, their depiction until people start tweaking them into something otherwise is one that should carry an alien mindset, thinking in different scales from humans and approaching issues with different values.

I MEAN, I agree that the standard fantasy races in general are kind of shit, and I prefer all-human settings, but if I have to keep one race it'll be elves.
>>
>>54960266
Typically elves aren't that special.

Humans beat elves in 3.5/pf and in a lot of games they just aren't worth playing.

I mean even dwarves have more culture
>>
>>54959762
Hylians are humans, at least in TP.
https://zelda.gamepedia.com/Human
>>
>>54960326
>I mean even dwarves have more culture
Ha! I remember we just had this thread and all dwarfags could answer was unsulting critics of being elves, like this was ever a good counter argument against anything,
>>
>>54960326
Dwarves are the absolute bottom of the barrel. Most of the time the non-euro human ethnicity are less human than dwarves are.
>>
>>54959807
All humanspeak is nonsense to your kind
>>
>>54960326
>I mean even dwarves have more culture
>HURP DURP WE DIG HOLES AND DRINK
Abbos have more culture than dwarves, m8
>>
Can someone provide me please with the picture of an elven woman explaining why she like to mate with humans, it's because it's like a love that could never get boring ?

Thanks in advance
>>
>>54960561
Anon, for elf to mate with human is like for human to mate with dog.
>>
>>54960266
the prolem is that most people stop at very superficial descriptions of charcters or setting they wish to use, often at most they'd have seen some movie depictions of them, and maybe they'd want to change them to be "creative" changing core concepts that made the characters what they are and leaving them as dumb caricatures.

So you have the elves who are just arrogant humans with pointy ears.
>>
>>54959951
Female night elves really got the short end of the stick. They had to do all the dirty work while the men slept for literal centuries and fucked around in proto-azeroth heaven, and on top of that they have to give birth.
>>
>>54960437
>non-euro humans less human than euro-humans

Euro-humans are part neanderthal, anon.

>>54960561
I don't think I have it, but I would think that elves would get over having their human lover's dying, kind of like >>54960585 how family pet deaths are easier to move on from than human deaths.
>>
>>54960561
>it's because it's like a love that could never get boring
That is really the most boring shit. And probably also some kind of self-insert fantasy.
>>
>>54960621
maybe it would be easier compared to the death of an elf lover, but it would still take her many decades at the least, if it was just a short fling
>>
>>54960414
>>54960437
>>54960472
Heavy industry, loving drinks, and being stubborn is more culture than.

>we like the forest, and bows and being jerks
>>
>>54960658
Or maybe never at all. If the elf saw something unique that they really liked in the human, the human's and by extension that thing's transience could make it all the more rare and difficult to let go of. Sometimes fleetingness increases appreciation.
>>
>>54959890
I would rather a very human looking race that seems different from humans in culture and mindset - take Vulkans, for instance - than a species of aliens that seem strange and inhuman, but have little that actually makes them different from humans in terms of their society and worldview.

Of course, ideally you could have a mix of both so that neither would feel overwhelming and there'd be a sense of variety in what kind of aliens you would find in the setting.
>>
>>54960706
Both are oversimplified meme versions of what the cultures of each races across different settings are, with the only difference that dwarf culture is almost universal as you described and the stereotypical Dwarf McBeard-Axe is all you get.
>>
>>54960633
If I recall the greentext he's talking about, it's because elves live so long and humans don't. A human romance will never last long enough to get into the dull monotony that most relationships will get into, so elves can always remember human lovers at their best.
>>
>>54960719
it's all about worldbuilding.
If you create a setting where it makes sense for a race similar but different from humans to exist and where the differences are a necessary part of that race and of their role in the setting it will work well.
If you just liked that race in some adaptation or just think they look cool or it's jusst somethign that everyone does so you want to use them to but have no idea of why they should be there, then you'll have those superficial "humans but a bit different" things.
Even so, this applies to every race, so it still doesn't explain why some peopel hate elves and are so vocal about it.
>>
>>54960782
Yea but dwarves are like an actual culture. Elves are just kind of ancient nature freaks.

Even Tolkien's elves are less culturally interesting then the humans.
>>
>>54960621
And Asians are largely Denisovan and Neanderthal, more so than Europeans.

What's your point?
>>
>>54960862
>Elves are just kind of ancient nature freaks
And dwarves are just kind of ancient mountain freaks. Really great job at portraying your argument, should have responded with
>t. elf
or something like this.
>>
>>54960910
Dwarves like money, and fighting, and being angry.

What do elves like?
>>
>>54960713
that was exactly what the picture described.
I'm having a hard time finding it on google
>>
>>54960924
Depends on the setting.
>>
>>54960897
It means whites and asians are technically less human than black humans due to interspecies mixing.
Most fantasy dwarves are "white", which is why they don't look very different from white humans compared to black humans vs white humans, so >>54960437 has that point. I'm just saying that implying that Euro-humans are the default humans is scientifically wrong.
>>
>>54960793
>>54960793
>A human romance will never last long enough to get into the dull monotony
No. This is the dumbest shit. First you have to define how long a relationship has to last until it gets into dull monotony. For us humans first, which is a huge topic and which you probably have no idea what you are talking about. I also don't know much about the actual hard science about long lasting relationships, so I would never make this a point in my world-building. Second, you have to assume that elves aren't suited for ralationships with their own kind, which is incredible stupid, because either nature hates elves and want them to go extinct, or the gods that made them hate them and want them to go extinct. Because there is no good reason why a race with a huge lifespan is not made to endure the consequences of such a long life. Third this is just an excuse to make elves and humans bang again, which never is to the advantage of the elves, but always empowers the point-of-view humans.
>>
>>54956058
You're right, from a literary standpoint, but they also left out a lot that was in the books about the elves fighting Sauron and the maiar throught history. The artistic license they took serves to show an (mainstream and casual) audience some of that.
>>
>>54960989
True, true. And I don't mean to disparage the movies, or even that particular change. Jackson's LotR flicks are about as good an adaptation as I think could be made, and I enjoy them immensely.
I just find it amusing you'd use that particular scene.

Never liked the Hobbit films, though.
>>
>>54942827
I mean having an objectively superior species is pretty fucking retarded. How are humans not extinct if elves are better in every way?
>>
>>54961070
Super low birth rates. If it takes several decades for a new elf to be born and even longer until they are viably independent, they'll be up against a species that can amass dozens if not hundreds of people to gang up on each elf.
>>
>>54961109
Then they aren't superior if I can meet elves 4:1 then I can exterminate them.
>>
>>54960981
It's not that elves aren't suited for relationships with their own kind, it's just that romances with humans are fun little flings that last the equivalent of a few months or years for them.
>>
>>54961241
There is nothing stopping elves from having the exact same relationship with other elves if they are into this kind of thing.
>>
>>54960974
How does that intermixing have anything to do with what the default "human" should be?

The "default" is whatever the writer is.

Euro writers, euro defaults.
>>
>>54961132
On a 1:1 adult basis they may well be superior.

They're just not multiplying like locusts.
>>
>>54961621
The whole way you tell if a species is successful is how much they breed.


Therefore humans are superior to elves, simply due to numbers advantage
>>
>>54961820
So locusts and rats are superior to humans, and all of them are inferior to just about any bacteria you can name. Good to know.

The way I see it, if both groups still have a stable population then neither can be considered "superior." One only wins when the other dies out.
>>
>>54951079
Lots of elves are human. Simple test:
1) Have a human fuck an elf.
- Can this union produce a child?
- If no, then elf is not human.
- If yes, proceed to 2)
2) Are half-elves sterile?
- If yes, then elf is not human.
- If no, proceed to 3)
3) Weep openly, for your elves are human.

There's a reason so many RPGs refer to it as your race and not as your species.
>>
>>54960924
Magic. Elves will inevitably be tied to magic in every setting.
>>
>>54961024
I agree. They were campy fun, but they probably shouldve only split it into two movies and kept it closer to the book. The hobbit was supposed to be more of a whimsical tale anyway.
>>
>>54948145

>Not the board for straight shota, anon.
>>
>>54948449
OrCs are the descendants of elves forcibily twisted, tortured and corrupted by Morgoth. An elf doesn't become an orc just because they are an asshole (see: Feanor)

.>>54948523

No he wasn't. He was a Maia.
>>
Related to the topic, the elven language summarized:
"Tree tree bush shrub flower flower moss, buttsex."
>>
>>54942767
I dont, hate Elves OP. In fact quite a lot of the hentai I have is.... Oh, you meant in the OTHER way right?

Okay, how can we put this?
Simply put, in every system or setting that Elves are in they are portrayed as some form of super intelligent, graceful, incredible race that is all high and mighty, powerful and arrogant. They are haughty, self centred, bastards and what is worse they usually get stupidly good abilities because "reasons". They are often portrayed as a dying race too, because they need a "tragic flaw". All this conspires to make Elves the biggest non-character mary sues in most settings, with the crowning title going to the Eragon series where Elves are better than Humans in every single aspect AND have magic to boot.

If you do not believe me then please look at any contemporary setting and prove me wrong. LOTR? Elves where all for ditching the other races and fucking of to their island paradise before their princess fell in love.
DnD? Most settings portray Elves in such faggish ways.
Warhamer Fantasy? Have you ever read the High Elf fluff? They basically fucked off and left the rest of the world to suffer.
40K? Elves created a Chaos god and now want someone else to clean up their mess.
Go and check for yourselves, Elves are horrible mary sues.

I hate to say this, but the only non-sueish Elf portrayals I have ever seen have been in anime. Make of that what you will.
>>
>>54961940
>So locusts and rats are superior to humans,

From a survival perspective, yes, they are.

While we have a lot going for us, we're not most successful from a biological standpoint. Our biological failures are counteracted by our intellect and usage of technology.
>>
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>>54962572
>>
>>54959196
An abomination all the same as Priscilla. Really though I was just memeing, I didn't like having to kill Yorshka but did to get her chime.
>>
>>54959848
This.

I don't hate elves. I hate people who play elves. It doesn't matter if it's pen and paper, freeform rp, """MMO""" rp, wherever or whatever, almost every single elf character and player is shit. Diamonds in the rough exist, but they're rare as fuck.

Elves just seem to attract every single type of freak, from the degenerate erp lewd fags, to the PSH NOTHIN PERSONEL KIDs, the weebs, the selfinserts, the kid who just saw LotR for the first time, all of it.

Take a look at the WoW forums some time and take a guess who can't shut the fuck up about their character's race.
>>
>>54960613
>Female night elves really got the short end of the stick. They had to do all the dirty work while the men slept for literal centuries and fucked around in proto-azeroth heaven, and on top of that they have to give birth.

But since NE's are huge sluts, they get to get fucked a lot. Which makes up for practically everything else. Nothing is as good as taking a dick or three.
>>
>>54963629
NE are pure you dumbfuck
>>
>>54942767
You spend three and a half years doing campaigns where basically all you are doing is cockblocking and evil elf that wants her hummie boy toy back through killing all of creation and see how you feel.
>>
>>54952208
>vegan elves are a meme, they barely exist.
Restaurant to Another World has them.
>>
>>54953529
>lolmagic means no rules
I hate people like you

Magic means *different* rules. If it isn't self-consistent then that's just bad writing.
>>
>>54942937
this is what will happen with robots.
>>
>>54942937
>elves as sentient dogs with humanoid bodies
Yeah, alright.
>>
>>54943266
it is, isn't it?
>>
>>54942767
eva is my waifu, fuck off all of you faggots.
>>
>>54953847
Those are humans, they still have human proportions.
Their pointed ears have to do with their god Hylia. Apparently you have to have ears that shape to hear divine messages.

If anything, the Gerudo and Sheikah are closer to elves, with their slender proportions and innate propensity for magic.
>>
>>54964864
But she's happily married and has kids
>>
>>54964892
fuck you, i want to cuck dally and raise his kids as my own, and impregnate eva over and over
>>
>>54954066
if they get to be swooned over for looking svelt and androgynous, why is it unappealing on me?
It ain't fair I tells ya.
>>
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>>54955068
Wow, it's true after all.
>>
>>54954636
>use ears as handlebars
>not fucking their earpussies
fucking normie.
>>
>>54955310
ME GENERATION
XIR
ECONUT
MAGA
RACIAL SUPERIORITY
WE WUZ KANGZ

Wow, it's like if you concentrated all the cancer humanity has come to embody in the past 10 years into one race.

Did they even miss any points?
>>
>>54956562
There's still two holes.
>>
>>54955644
Orcs? Hobgoblins?
>>
>>54959890
>fantasy races
>aliens
You are retarded.
>>
>>54956521
If they live that long, why have they not overpopulated?

That's my question for all hypothetical elves. You should always have an answer for it.
>>
>>54964986
breeding like goddamn rats.
Keep in in your goddamn pants, third world.
>>
>>54948277
>the drow were just dominatrix play that went to far and kept going
>>
>>54958915
>What the fuck else am I supposed to identify as
A colossal homosexual.
>>
>>54960585
Bestiality seems like a pretty fresh angle for someone bored with all other manners of typical sex.
>>
>>54965104
let me educate you...
horse pussy is actually superior to human pussy in every way
>>
>>54961820
that would make orcs and south african humans the best
>>
>>54962917
does anyone have that cap where it was steve irwin hogtying and gender identifying a wild elf?
>>
>>54942767
But that's not an elf though, she's human (cra)
>>
>>54964916
M8, he's a god, he'll kick your ass
>>
>not having an elf bro and travelling and fighting with him for years to give him a grudging admiration for humanity and a form a deep friendship

It's like you don't like epic stories.
>>
>>54961301
There is though. The whole point is death brings about an abrupt end to the relationship, inevitably, with humans. Not with Elves. The idea is that love between two elves would continue either forever or until they got bored, and given the long lived nature and their general complacency in most settings, will take a long time.

There are inherent differences between a relationship with a human and an elf, and I think this is a possible outcome. Stating it as a universal truth is a little silly to me because it's just as likely that an Elf would find men too impulsive for them, but I think either way can be a totally valid option.
>>
>>54949698
>liking coal burners.
>>
File: Hey Mon'Keigh, wanna ss.png (800KB, 1394x2277px) Image search: [Google]
Hey Mon'Keigh, wanna ss.png
800KB, 1394x2277px
>>54965143
If I have it, I can't find it. Have a greentext about 40k /ss/, instead.
It's only spoilered for the sake of the ending.
>>
>>54965079
To be fair, it's heavily linked to death rate.

We used to breed that heavy too, because people died left and right.
Then medicine got better, nutrition got better, and wars got less frequent and less bloody. And population boomed because out births were higher than our deaths.
Then our births slowed. The entire first world now sits at about 1.5 children per household.

In fact, with only some very small and sparce exceptions, the global baseline is now completely in that second stage and, if you track the birth rates, has been slowly transitioning into stage three since about 1980 over all regions. Most since 1960.

The only region not already below average 3 children per household is south africa, and unless things change drastically they are set to reach it by 2060. Faster if their nutrition, medicine, or peace improve.

It's fine, and will be solved shortly, unless somebody goes full retard and starts another continent-sized total war to push number back up.
>>
>>54965116
Okay mlp. have fun.
Do remember that cartoons are more comfy than reality.
>>
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>>54965637
I'm just waiting on these fucks to stop overbreeding.
Then I can engage in my plan and show them how you properly overpopulate a planet.
>>
>>54961955
It's fantasy fiction.

Under this rigorous restriction , fire breathing dragons, immortal fairies, pixies, and all manner of inhuman demons and deities are also human, because one of the core conceits of a lot of these fantasy settings (particularly d&d) is that you can crossbreed basically anything.

>>54962447
Look at jrr tolkiens the hobbit. One, much better 4 hour movie, made from footage of the extended cuts of Jackson's films.
>>
>>54966309
>I'm just waiting on these fucks to stop overbreeding.
I already highlighted what you need to do to speed that up. Better quality of life. Make them first world, so that the 1st world 1.5 children curse can take hold sooner.
>>
>>54956359
>Black elf
Is there such a thing?
>>
>>54966351
I find amusing that they left out so many important stuff from the book in the extended cuts and keep adding new OC shit.
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