Evenin' son You seen any Paladins 'round these parts?

>>54821532
Sheesh, fuck all these corrupt wight cops.

>>54821532
Evenin' officer.

ain't seen no dins, but some warlocks been a tad nosy around town lately.

>>54821583
>implying
Paladindus are the ones dragging this society down

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>>54821532

Officer I'd like to report my friend. He's started doing Paladin stuff after school and isn't as cool as he used to be, I don't like how he's become.

>>54821792
Your wight privilege is showing.

>>54821583
>>54821792
>>54822554
Under rated bants

Reminder that paladins make up only a tiny fraction of population, but commit 80% of anti-undead crime.

>>54822554
You like to bitch and moan about skeletons, but you all know that you rely on them for support.

>>54822683
Also, paladins typically use intelligence as a dump stat.

>>54822738
Oh come on, really? That's exactly the kind of disgusting rhetoric that increases the divide between the undead and the paladins. You call the entire class violent idiots, and you're surprised they distrust and fear the undead?

Do you know who the real enemy is?

Clerics.

They provide paladins with holy symbols. They are the ones preaching anti-undead rhetoric. They talk about converting all the heathens and how everyone is equal, but ever notice that in their holy city, only clerics are allowed in?

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Friendly reminder that race traitors will be the first to go on the Day of the Bone

>>54822685
clever lad

>>54821583
>>54821792
>>54822554

10/10

>>54821583
FPBP

>>54822683

That's because the fucking wights are harsher on them. Clerics and Fighters all commit anti-undead crime, but Paladins are the only ones arrested for it.

>>54821532
>Watertown

Cops from there will let you get away with anything.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FZJcv_rdFAQ

>>54822883

Rangers are way worse.

I live in a long-forgotten cemetery (unlike you necropolis fucks) and Rangers lead groups to my home every fucking night.

>>54824763
sheeeeeiiiiit it's da wight man to blame for muh mistakes an shortcomins sheeeeiiiiit

gibs me money?

>>54824804

This is the problem with you fucking cages. You just spout fucking memes and stereotypes while eating bread and drinking vinegar.

>>54824804
>wight man
Slayed me

>>54824791
>blaming rangers

Druids are the problem.

>>54824835
sheeeeiiiiit cuz what dis mans say

u got a rap contract yet gnomie??

gibs me money?

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>>54821532
Yes officer the holy shits went down that way!

>>54821583
Racism is a combination of prejudice and power, specifically the power of level drain.

>>54825650
Guys, seriously, it's 5E. Level drain shouldn't even a thing anymore. Isn't it time for wight people to get on with times?

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they breaking through your doors they smashing your undead up.
they tryna smite your zombies
so you gotta hide align hide your wight
hide align hide your wight

>>54825671
>oy vey fellow goyim don't they know it is CURRENT YEAR

lmao every time

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>>54821532
I ain't seen nothin', ham-bone

>>54825671
>5E
>Still using level drain
There's no better illustration of wight privilege than this.

Ugh, there is no difference between undead and other races. Wightness is a social construct.

Ugh, the level drain myth is just undead supremecist nonsense.

Ugh, wights are appropriating paladin culture. Only paladins should be allowed to wear armor and cast spells, because they invented it.

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>>54825742

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Hey guys, look at me, I'm a paladin lol.

*smacks lips*

Ayyooo, where the wight women at?

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>>54825784
>Ayyooo, where the wight women at?

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So

*Smacks lips

you be sayin

*smites*

so you be sayin'

*ressurects his dead homie*

so you be sayin'

*lays on hands*

we sum finna

*sins then repents*

AVENTURIN SQUUUAAAA?

*Evolves into blackguard*

>>54825858
>blackguard
more like redguard amirite

>he was a lawful good boy, he came to the temple every week
Oh please. You just know he was out raiding dungeons with his rogue friends like every other Paladin.

>>54826200

CURVED. SWORDS.

>>54821583
FPBP

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BONEDRONES KEEP MOVING

THIS IS NOW A PALADIN THREAD

>>54826733

THIS IS NOW A PALADIN LAW ZONE.

>>54826372
>Claims to belong to a lawful good religion
>Breaks into a lich's crypt while they're asleep and steal all their treasure
>Lich wakes up and goes to see what's going on
>Beat the lich up and leave them in critical condition
>Never hear about this in the divining pool.

But if one pally gets killed, it's all you'll hear about for the next 4 months.

Fuck the manastream media.

>>54826733
>>54826761
BROTHERS IN ARMS, SHALL WE JOIN IN EXTREMELY LOUD PRAYER TO BAHAMUT

>>54826372
>>54826821
#NotAllPaladins

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>>54826733
>>54826761
>>54826868
How come paladins always have to form holy orders? This sort of petty piety should have been left in the holy lands.

They're clearly too primitive to live in a modern necropolis.

>>54826933

THOSE WHO INSULT BAHAMUT SHALL BE SMITED!!!

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Cathedrals for Paladins, Chapels for Clerics, Necropoli for Everyone?

They say the LIFE problem will be solved when the living world pours into EVERY necropolis and ONLY necropoli

Undercity and Sylvania are more crowded than Altdorf or Thorolund, but they don’t say the Altdorf or Thorolund will solve the LIFE problem by bringing in millions of living people and ” assimilating ” with them.

They say the final solution to the LIFE problem is for EVERY necropolis and ONLY necropoli to “assimilate,” i.e., intermingle, with all those living beings

What if I said there was a LIFE problem, and the solution to this LIFE problem was to bring hundreds of millions of undead into EVERY Cathedral, Chapel and Sacred Grove?

How long would it take them to realize I’m not talking about a LIFE problem. I am talking about the final solution to the LIVING problem?

And how long would it take living people to notice this, and what sane living being wouldn’t object to this “solution”?

But when I tell the obvious truth about the ongoing program of genocide against my people, the undead, Paladins AND respectable Clerics agree that I’m a lichwhowantstoressurectsixmillioncorpses

They say they are Enemies of Darkness, when what they really all are is Enemies of the Undead

Evil is a codeword for Undead

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Kelthuzad did nothing wrong. He only attacked Lordaron because the Silver Hand were smiting ghouls. The cursed grain is a myth, there is no way one necromancer can grow enough wheat to infect an entire kingdom.

>>54827037
Paladins and non-undead (except necromancers) are too intelligence dump-statted and too combat-oriented to achieve a first-world developed civilised society with a high quality of afterlife and low smite rates, which is why they all want to live in our undead necropoli.

non-undead hate us yet want to live among us because they envy us, our success and our civilisation. They also want to date, have sex with (or in most cases necrophile) undead corpses because their own women are so hideous.

non-undead fear the very thought of being sent back to their own countries because they don't want to live among their own savage low-int non-undead people born in their natural habitat, instead they enjoy living among us Necropolitans, with all the benefits of living in our more advanced societies than their own.

when we undead are gone then so is our civilisation, meaning there will be no more high quality of afterlife and low smite rates for non-undead to leech off of because they would've replaced it all with their own minmaxed stupid and violent people, non-undead brought this on themselves because of their own existence.

>>54826733
>>54826761
>>54826868

please go back to /pal/

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>mfw lifers in lands that weren't colonized by glorious superior necromancy have never produced anything of worth
Why didn't lifers ever figure out how to make skeleton workers? This is just proof that lifers are genetically inferior to the master race

>>54825858
Looks like Geno lol. A shitty green Geno.

>>54826953
Smote.

>>54821583
Living lives matter.

>>54825740

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>>54821532
FUCK DA POLICE COMING STRAIGHT FROM THE UNDERGROUND !

>>54822883
Clerics are the chosen people of their gods. There are plenty people of clerics of the gods of death - you just don't want to aknowledge them, or paint them as enemies, because it doesn't fit your agenda of
>Hurr durr, clerics of death can control undead
And never ONCE you show the proof of it, beyond some crazy conspiracy theories and pointing out coincidences.

>>54830015

you go back to deddit

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y'all muhfuggin bonebois cant fight lmao

ever noticed how it takes 15-20 skeletons to bring down one Paladin?

yeah, there IS a genetic difference between the living and the dead. the living are SUPERIOR

sorry if your fragile skeletal structure can't handle the facts

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stylin' on you boknee pipo lol

>>54835722
>>54835799
Why do paladins always feel the need to dress up in gold?

>>54835831

BECAUSE WE WANT YOU TO SEE US AS WE ROLL UP ON YA AND POP YO TAIL BONE WITH MY 5 FOOT 3 INCHs OF STEEL

CLANK CLANK MUTHAFUCKA

>>54835831
so we can look fly stylin' on u jelly skellies

>>54835831
So that you can see who's woopin' your ass you no-eyed fuckers.

>>54835831
poorfag detected, back to the boneyard with you

>>54835831
Same reason all fleshies cover up; Because the flesh is ugly and shameful, even to them who choose it over their true selves.

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>>54826933
>>54827037
>>54827465
No guys that's where you're wrong, your not looking at the big picture. It's the gods who are controlling all the Paladins and Clerics. I was just like them before I got dead-pilled. #Oathbeaker #Blackguard #RAISED

>>54837065

TRAITORS GET THE HOLY ROPE!

>>54837065
undead tom

>>54837065
What do you expect me to say, "based paladin man"? Fuck off to the_arthas, where scum like you belongs. All paladins need to be killed, including "converts".

>>54837065
Fuck G*d and fuck Paladins

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Explain this, Boneheads

You claim to respect Paladins, and then do shit like that?

My culture is not a costume

>>54837750
>he fell for the Jew meme
Paladin propaganda

>>54835831
>Dress up in gold
>Complain you don't have enough money for food
And then you hear all the bleeding heart wights talking about how we need to lift them up out of their vow of poverty and give them even more treasure

>>54835626
FACT 1: Every theocracy on the planet is run by clerics.
FACT 2: Clerics hate secular governments and try to install a theocracy everywhere they go. They claim that it's the most benevolent form of government but really they just want control.
FACT 3: Once clerics gain full control of a country, they ALWAYS begin purging undead. You never hear about the 20 million wights destroyed in Kislev because clerics control all the oracles and heralds. They're already purging us, they're just doing it more subtly this time by displacing us and making us breed with humans to create half-dead who aren't even immortal.

I have a boner.

>>54839576
Oh and if you ever bring any of this up to a cleric, they'll just brush it away by saying "that wasn't TRUE theocracy", because to them theocracy is this perfect snd infallible thing that can never do any wrong.

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>>54827037
Ayyy yo you best shut the fuck up xylophone chest before things get TURNT THE FUCK UP know what I'm sayin'?

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>>54839689
If there were a holy war, you paladins would be fucked. You don't even know how to hold a sword right. You idiots hold it upside down. Us undead have been practicing swordfighting for centuries. We take our childes swordfighting.

>>54837730
>My culture is not a costume
Your entire body is literally just a costume for your skeleton, fleshbag.

>>54839597
YOU CAN'T SAY THAT IN A COASTIAN TOME

>>54821583
Kek :^)

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>>54835831
Why don't you?

>>54825858
I've always hated "sum finna", that's not even a real phrase

>>54840540
Gold is a very valuable commodity, therefore you are right and I must follow my Paladin instincts and bow before you.

>>54833847
>not just "lives matter"

>>54839597
I don't get it

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>>54839576
>>54839682
>You never hear about the 20 million wights destroyed in Kislev
Yeah you do? We fucking BRAG about it, bonebitch! You and your undead pals can't handle my holy swagga or my blessed steel!

We came for you in Kislev and we're coming for you in Sylvania, in Undercity, in Mordheim and everywhere else you've crawled out of your graves! Stay 6ft deep and we wouldn't have this problem now, would we?

I took 63 of you down in the Highlands march and Sol willing, I'll double that in the march on the Shrieking Wastes. You boneheads want to escape the purge, you better get back in your graves!

>>54845489
I'm reporting this post to the authorities

>posting cheap paladin-bait threads
Skeletons ruined this realm desu

>>54825740
Ayy yo man thanks for being cool. Cops don't let nothing go. What's so wrong with wanting to sell a little bit of Sacred Aqua on the side? I got kids to feed.

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You mad wight boy

I feel like we're not giving enough attention to the causes behind the socio-economic issues in the paladin community.

The trend of paladins and clerics teaching new paladins how to smite the undead and wear golden plate then running off without inducting them into an order is the primary cause for order-less paladins. The order is integral to the social development of a paladin; he's nothing without a code to teach him chivalry.

>>54839576
>>54839576
EXCUSE ME, I LOVE MY BONY CAGE WIFE. WE HOLD HANDS ALL THE TIME AND I DON'T LIKE YOU TALKING ABOUT MY IVORY PRINCESS LIKE THAT!>>54839740

>>54839740
Excuse me bone-san but I have to disagree with you there. The mace (the traditional paladin weapon) is the greatest weapon ever made. The steel is regularly forged by lifelong masters, blessed over 1000 times and can easily crush even a mausoleum door like it was butter. Frankly, it's superior even to the crossbow in the hands of a trained master, as a mace can be used infinitely whereas a crossbow needs to be reloaded. You baka-bonejin lack an appreciation of the finer points of mace-jutsu and I'm not surprised in the least that you would make such an ignorant remark.

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Paladin here
Ama

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Why is it that everytime a paladin """"""falls""""""" they become total bros?

>>54845865
>paladin runs up to a cross-bow skeleton with a mace
>gets shot in the face and dies

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>>54845865
God, stfu. You maceaboos make the rest of us look bad. The mace has its uses, but so does a good sword, or a lance.

Pic related. My little sister's making me so proud!

>>54845895
Mah Templar! You ever been part of an exalted march, bro? Shit's dope, knowing you've got hundreds of your brothers and thousands of the faithful at your back!

>>54845939
>Implying shields don't exist
>Implying blessings don't exist
>Implying you won't get a holy spear of light through the ribcage from 200m away

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>>54845916
>the only good kind of paladin is an Uncle Arthas
fuck outta here boneboy

>>54845965
Only on one, not much of a social guy. I usually just do jobs for the church and protect the clergy.

>>54845965
>mace with shield
You'd get ganked by shiv skeletons and die
>blessings
Any good lich will have hallowed grounds set up all over the place
>spear
>through the ribcage
>of a fucking skeleton
The spear fizzles out cause hallow ground or just goes straight through the ribcage because it's a fucking skeleton

>all these wights into hymn-hop
baka (shaking my helmet)

You have your own spooky organ music, why do you gotta appropriate paladin ritual chants

>>54822883
Pelorism - religion of peace.

>>54846020
I feel you man. You know what? I respect that. I'm more a vanguard-against-darkness guy myself, but there's no shame in running protection and doing church work. Someone's gotta do it and it takes a good paladin to know when he's more use in a job some people would scoff at. Keep the faith, Templar.

>>54846109
>Implying shiv skeletons can get through armour, faith and skill
>Implying that corruption won't be countered by consecration
>You've never been hit by a spear of light spell, have you? That shit explodes on contact with necrotic or demonic energy, bonehead! They'll be picking chips of femur out of the masonry for WEEKS!

>>54846219
We're very peaceful! We just wanna make sure the undead Rest In Peace. And if they won't do that, we'll make them rest in pieces!

Anyone else think Sir Halinal's 'Rest In Peace' engraving on his halberd it completely righteous? I'd get that shit on my sword, if it wouldn't be totally ripping him off.

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>Paladins are peaceful
Just look at that crazed look in his eye, he's out for marrow

>>54846319
Fucking pal-qaeda get out

>>54846319

These attitudes are why pal-quedans are incompatible with modern, civilized necropolis life. Go back to your cloisters where you belong.

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>implying all humans don't all support their Paladin brothers' misdeeds on some level

HEY HEY

HO HO

SQUISHY FLESHBAGS HAVE GOT TO GO

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>>54846589
>>54846653
Life comes before death. Skellies go home back to your graves.

>>54846698
You wanna fucking GO, you calcium-deficient pile of unprocessed fertiliser?! We all know you ain't SHIT without a necromancer!

>>54826554
>The fact I get that reference
god damn it

>>54822883
#NotAllCleris

We are zombies and we are wight, am I right ?

GAS THE CLERICS FLESH WAR NOW

>>54824835
>cages
this is the perfect skeleton slur for flesh beings and i'm gonna use it