Alternative Quests Board

>I want to f*ck a monster. Wizard and adventuring party needed to capture and magically subjugate monster(s), then leave it in a secluded area. Pay is good, but my privacy is a must

>My neighbour's sheep are probably one-eighth to one-sixteenth Dire. Druid needed to bring me proof; laws are strict about this shit.

>Kobolds keep stealing bricks from my house. Find out why. Maybe stop them if it's not something adorable or silly.

>[mildly singed] Is my child a sorceror, a psion, possessed, or something weirder? He keeps doing things and I do not know what or how to stop it.

>>54762836
>Local dragon seeking adventurers to help impress father by pretending to be beaten, will pay in gold and/or favours

>Rogue needed to help break into my house. Forgot my key again.

>Now hiring people to make The Horny Toad Inn look busy to adventures, inquire within!

>Needed: schoolteacher to educate local children while town priest is otherwise engaged
>Advice sought for how to deal with inveterate gambler before he loses all our savings
>Cat missing, inquire at inn
>I, a trader in rare spices and foods, require good folk to deliver to me local edible funghi for appraisal
>Requested: List of local angling spots
>Good cook needed to help prepare local delicacy

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>Adventurer needed on how to catch the eye of an orc female.
>Requesting group of rangers to play cowboys and indians with daughter; toy weapons available; pay is good
>All the contents of my underwear drawer has turned invisible and I'm certain a guild mage is behind this. Need a band of intrepid adventurers to give him a taste of their own medicine
>HELP. MYSTERIOUS FREAKY BOY FOUND IN WINE CELLAR. SKIN IS RUBBERY. SAYS HE CAN SEE THE THINGS THAT HOVER IN MY SLEEP. EXPLAINATION URGENT.
>Looking for a wet nurse that has experience in draconic enconters. Compensation high.

>Kobolds stole my baby, and now are trying to return it. Convince them to keep it.

>Loli mage won't stop using my house as target practice. Property value has plummeted. Burly adventurers needed to spook her into stopping.

>For sale: Iron shoes. Allegedly when worn through remove curses. Suitable for long journey.

>For sale: Father's spell book. Never used.

>>54764740
For sale: seven-league boot. Worn once.
still looking for the other one