ITT Warning Signs

>>54736498
Any time the players are confused why something in a game world would exist when it's not an immediate obstacle or something they can use.

>>54736498
I usually give my characters a bag of holding in the beginning. It's less of a headache and can lead to some cool or funny situations.

>>54736498
>The DM forces you to keep track of encumbrance, food, water and ammunition

>complex encounter with multiple enemies
>Ok Feril, your turn
*rolls dice without saying a word*
>I attack with my bow
...

>>54736587
fucker was trying to carry 8 spears and medium shields out of a dungeon, by himself, while already carrying a full survival load including his own armor, an arming sword, a medium shield of his own, a handaxe, great helm, and foot mace. he had a bundle of torches, spare water, iron rations, 50 feet of rope, among other shit in his backpack.

so fuck you. there's a breaking point. I don't run an anime campaign. you have fucking limits.

>>54736593
make him play a caster. then he has to learn how to make decisions, and doesn't have dice to fuck up.

>>54736587
always tell my players if this is gonna be important before the game starts. usually its not. they get mad the few times it is. tell them, "this might not be the game for you then, you're welcome to go home and play again when i run something else." the ones who leave are usually not invited back. if you're gonna show up to a game KNOWING what the rules are gonna be then get mad enough about having to follow the rules like everyone else at the table to leave then i dont want you in my home.

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>Okay guys we're voting on genre for the next campaign
>all but 1 vote for alt-history 1914 wartime espionage using shadowrun
>only 1 player makes a remotely stealth or subterfuge capable character

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>>54736693
>Show up at Anons place
>"Okay so for my new setting I'm going to play a bit of a survival thing, you're gonna need to keep food, water and ammo, oh, and you can't carry a lot of shit at the same time."
>"Nah thanks, I'll pass this one, doesn't seem like my kinda thing.."
>"this might not be the game for you then, you're welcome to go home and play again when i run something else."
>"Great anon, thanks, shoot me a PM when you're done with this one, I'm glad we could come to an agreement.

>Five months pass
>Still no text from anon
>That cunt ditched me for not wanting to play his retarded le realism game
>MFW

>>54736587
Fun for zombie apocalypse campaigns.

>>54736498
>I want to play an intrigue game.

>>54736662
Why do shitbags always blame their autism on the anime?

>my character has a pre existing connection to organized crime

>>54736593
>*rolls dice without saying a word*
FFFFFUUUUCKING THIS! Every session, EVERY. GODDAMN. SESSION. FOR THE PAST TWO AND A HALF YEARS, I gotta remind the Mentalist player to TELL. ME. Just WHAT THE FUCK he's rolling the dice for BEFORE HE FUCKING ROLLS.
Other than that, he's an okay player, if a tad uninterested in shit that ain't combat, but I can deal with that.

>>54736974
way to only read part of my post. i said i inform them before hand and that they show up at my house already knowing the rules for the game.

>>54737073
only an asshole would wait until everyone was there to tell the players about the game

>>54736974
>>54736587
>the DM enforces and follows the rules that are there for a reason

>>54737027
because shonen anime protags are the type of characters who could carry like 30lbs of additional steel, on top of a survival load, while still expecting to have both hands free.

>>54737151
>you can't do this

Wow, I didn't realize fa/tg/uys really were that fucking useless.

>>54737174
see >>54736662
he had a bundle of torches, 50 fucking feet of coiled, heavy rope, water, rations,... the backpack was fucking full. and he had 3 weapons strapped to him, in addition to a full suit of armor.

yes, he might be simply mildly encumbered by the additional weight, but he had no place to put it, and expected it to all go magically into his backpack, because HE EXPECTED TO HAVE HIS HANDS FREE despite picking up 8 spears and 8 shields.

you either haven't read th thread, or you are actually mentally retarded and think that "weight" goes into a cosmic hammerspace when a person picks up an object.

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>They demand to use point buy after everyone else rolled their stats

Warning signs, as in player red flags? I've got quite a few.
>getting excited when they roll a natural 20
>having depression or any kind of "soft" mental disorder
>not wanting to roleplay hunting / camping / survival stuff at all, while playing a ranger or druid
>not wanting to RP buying magic items (though this is understandable when there's a lot)
>metagaming about how doing X would be better for his character's "story"
>pointing out cliches/tropes in the campaign during actual play, out of character
>replying to OOC comments with "what's X (modern thing)?"
>constantly switching between IC and OoC
>not speaking in character at all
>not taking the initiative to the point where the GM asks "so you are doing [obvious way forward]?"
>making genderless / bisexual / transgender characters
>spouting tumblrisms in-game
>having the GM create an entire adventure involving the character's backstory including a huge ruined castle with over 200 areas, then quitting the campaign
>inviting his girlfriend to the game
>using the "world made of magic" argument for why his fighter can conjure tools not listed on his character sheet
>abusing vaguely worded abilities and getting into semantic debates
>getting salty when they take a critical hit
>blaming the DM when they run into an "unbalanced encounter"
>whining about a player using his own knowledge of a monster then retroactively justifying it with a knowledge roll, then continuing to get salty over it 30 minutes later
>wanting to play a non-core race
>wanting to play a non-core class
>saying that core wizards will break the campaign then realizing an actual campaign isn't his theorycrafted hugbox and getting BTFO then getting salty about it
>trying to plan the campaign for the DM then complaining when a "sidequest" takes longer than 2 sessions
>actually using the word "sidequest" in character.

Hmm... can't think of any off the top of my head but >>54737348 gave me an idea

>letting players BUY magic items
yeah that'd set off some alarms

>>54737348
Your group sucks.

>>54737348
Are hard mental disorders not a red flag?

Some more:
>saying shit like "I only have a 12 charisma"
>whining about rolling 12 13 14 14 14 13
>whining they don't start the campaign with an 18+ in a stat
>whining about actually having to think tactically for once
>whining and asking the GM "what CR is this encounter"
>whining when the GM tries to narrate combat and can't come up with a pulitzer-prize-winning description for every single hit
>whining when a character who takes 39 damage from a frost giant mace is "knocked backward onto the ground" for flavor but can get back up before he can bring his mace to bear again
>whining when a longbow deals 14 damage because they forgot that weapon specialization exists
>whining that they can't use second wind while unconscious and having to explain the unconscious condition
>whining that the magic item they want to buy is not available in town
>whining that almost all of the NPCs are human
>whining that there are no gay characters in the campaign
>whining that they were lured into a trap that would have required actual perception to get out of because "my character has a 23 perception"
>making sarcastic comments to the GM months after he forgets a minor detail and using this episode to gaslight him into getting free magic items until the other players cal him out on it
>whining about fighting 1st level orcs when the majority of orcs are 1st level warriors
>whining that they fight stuff in the wilderness that is "too easy" when they are level 15
>whining that the fight is "too hard" when they fought an owlbear at level 1 despite having spotted it from over 1000 feet away and it having not noticed them yet
>whining when the ranger in the party who never gets an spotlight time wants to RP hunting and setting up camp, when the player whining got an ENTIRE session dedicated to him wandering off and solo-ing a side adventure
>whining when you get BTFO after wandering off alone and explicitly saying you weren't telling anyone where you were going.

>>54737502
this.

depression is manageable. stuff like violent schizos, or registered democrats are the crazies to watch out for.

>>54737404
>letting players BUY magic items
I mean, I like making the setting a little bit "vidya" ish, like making most of the guards pretty tough to beat to kind of "reign in" mischeivous PCs and such. I don't know why i started doing this recently, it's some weird nostalgia kick I was on. I never even played Runequest or World of Warcraft of any of those MMOs. I just felt like putting a tinge of that into my settings.

>>54737502
Well depression isn't a real thing, for one. Everyone is depressed and suicidal sometimes, it's a normal part of life. If I could deal with it, they can. I don't spend my time saying "yeah I'm depressed" I just shut the fuck up and get on with life. If you want to kill yourself, just do it and shut the hell up already.

>>54737507
>whining about fighting 1st level orcs when the majority of orcs are 1st level warriors
This actually pisses me off. I'm currently playing a campaign, where our enemies are consistently too weak to pose any kind of a threat to us. There are a lot of them, yes, but we crush them like ants and barely get any XP for it.

>>54737348
What the fuck is wrong with people getting excited over rolling high?

>>54737404
There's nothing wrong with magic shops, unless you want an ultra low magic setting

>>54737521
>implying anyone who ideolizes either current party doesn't where their underwear as a HAT

>>54737554
People who cant stop talking about being depressed can be real annoying cunts, but you are just human filth if you really think people should kill themselves.

>>54736974
Maybe the guy is still running the campaign 5 months later?

Some more:
>constant off-topic conversation
>interrupting the GM talking to talk about some gay-ass youtube video
>PULLING UP THE FUCKING YOUTUBE VIDEO DURING THE SESSION
>raping immersion constantly in every hole by making retarded anime references
>getting offended by a doomsday cult because it's similar to christianity
>whining about fighting something that actually thinks and uses spells
>whining that they ran into a spellcaster 8 levels above them when hinted at not to
>whining about the hint and blaming the GM for the encounter even though no one actually died
>getting mad at another GM for having a deity act even slightly outside of alignment
>getting angry at the GM for making the story more interesting
>getting angry at the GM for not wanting to start another campaign for you and three other friends after you quit the group
>missing sessions because you feel depressed
>literally sitting in the next room playing video games
>quitting a campaign out of spite because people didn't like your campaign
>quitting a campaign because your character died
>using phrases like "tank" and "face" while talking in character
>constantly trying to bring in homebrew races
>using 3rd party content
>throwing dice at the wall after you roll a 1 and breaking a painting
>grabbing another player by the throat to mime what you did to him
>sexually assaulting a captured female NPC during a game in which a 13 year old child was present as a player
>throwing a bitch fit because another player won't lend you dice
>throwing a bitchfit because another player won't give you a ride home
>throwing a bitch fit because you went below 0 hp in a hilarious way and someone laughed at it
>throwing a bitch fit because you rolled three natural 1s in a row and accidentally hit another party member with your arrow
>throwing a bitch fit because wealth by level is too low even though you casually BTFO every encounter anyway

I could go all night.

>>54736587
It's appropriate in certain situations, but tiresome for most adventures where all you do is go to the dungeon, kill everyone, and then go back to town.

>>54737556
Well in that case it was a hunting party they ambushed and were angry that they didn't just happen to be 3rd level orc rangers. When they fought the orc leaders then it was an actual higher level encounter cause they had spellcasters and such. But yeah your frustration is valid. Personally I like to have encounters with gnolls or bugbears because at level 1 you need the entire party to fight 1 or 2 of them, but at level 8 or 9 a single party member can BTFO several dozen of them. It's a good way to show progression; they start a bit below the bar, then push themselves way above it. Whereas with orcs they start at the bar and just keep going. So, valid point.

>>54737568
It's more the "LOL NATURAL 20" meme autism that wears on you after a while, to the point where I just irrationally hate nat20s. I wish d20s only went up to 19. I swear to god.

>>54737662
Why? If someone's really gonna kill themselves then they are in a lot of pain. You want them to keep suffering? Protip: it doesn't get better, no matter how many YouTube propoganda videos they make to keep betas from becoming an heroes, so they can keep working their asses off to support Tyrone and Laquisha's weed habit and six bastard children.

>>54737587
I've only had supporters of one particular party bring up their politics in the middle of my game. The Hillary shilling was particularly galling as we are in Canada.

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>>54737348
>getting excited when they roll a natural 20
A good thing you have 1/20 chances happens to you has occur? How dare you be happy about it!

>>54737662
I have clinical depression. Listen to me very closely: people who commit suicide deserve 0 sympathy. they are selfish, single minded idiots.

>>54737743
Exactly, I dont mind being reminded that carrying something while retaining a semblance of mobility would be odd, but for crying out loud, if it would take several trips to move the goods from point A to point B, don't make me detail everything and every trek if there is no way anything interesting happens during that time.

Along with having to manually move shit on the map with accuracy when moving between town 1 and town 2 for 15th time absolutely kills any interest for the game and makes the session drag out despite lack of actual content.

>>54737507
>>54737348
Is this all the same human being?
Also
>where are gays\i'm gay\why all of them are humans\etc
I'd GM this dipshit just to wreck his expectations.

>>54737770
That kind of nihilistic bullshit attitude is the reason you have to play with such people in the first place.

Dice falls off the the table and the GM doesn't demand that it be rerolled

Player doesn't roll openly

GM doesn't imply that it would really useful to invest in certain skills, then acts butthurt when no player has that skill

>>54737915
lol no it's not, it's because they are my good friends and because without me they would have no one to GM for them.

>>54737743
If you're just handwaving everything that you're doing on the adventure you're missing out on so much of the fun. Tracking turns, movement, wandering monsters, torchlight, and carrying the treasure back and forth makes a great experience.

>>54737969
You call someone who you think should kill themselves good friends? What?

But beside, the point, my sentence was somewhat misleading, what I meant to say was that others people attitude made them depressed, rather than it being your own doing.

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>>54737908
>Is this all the same human being?
Yes. I just realized how fun it is to vent my frustrations.

>>54737743
>tiresome for most adventures where all you do is go to the dungeon, kill everyone, and then go back to town.
Then stop running those adventures. They are shit anyway.

>>54738040
>You call someone who you think should kill themselves good friends?
I had a friend who committed suicide and while I felt sad and cried for him I agreed with his decision.

>>54738042
Boi, do you GM online or IRL?
Also, why don't you give him proper CATHARSIS?

>>54736662
Tie the spears together with the rope, tie to top of backpack. Watch for doorways.

The shields, I got nothing. Eight shields is a fucking awkward load no matter how you slice it.

>>54737554
>Everyone is depressed and suicidal sometimes, it's a normal part of life.
Is a three year streak of crippling apathy and frequent suicidal thoughts normal in your view?

>If you want to kill yourself, just do it and shut the hell up already.
If I were motivated enough to do the things I wanted to I wouldn't have this problem.

>>54737348
This is some serious autism, and it deserves to be answered in kind.

>>getting excited when they roll a natural 20

What's wrong with getting happy that a good thing has happened?

>>having depression or any kind of "soft" mental disorder

I see where you're coming from, but have had great players with depression and shitty ones w/o

>>not wanting to roleplay hunting / camping / survival stuff at all, while playing a ranger or druid

At some point, you get kind of tired of being passive observers to one guy doing his specialty that few others tend to be able to help with, see also Shadowrun and hacking


>>not wanting to RP buying magic items (though this is understandable when there's a lot)

>Letting your players out and out buy magical items.


>>metagaming about how doing X would be better for his character's "story"

Understandable, but some people really like things to be narratively satisfying, and that's not necessarily a crime. Talk to your players, you fucking sperg.


>>pointing out cliches/tropes in the campaign during actual play, out of character

Yeah, okay, this gets to me as well, especially if they're fucking smug about it.

>>replying to OOC comments with "what's X (modern thing)?"

This one is also a legitimate annoyance, especially when they do it over and over

>>constantly switching between IC and OoC

Sometimes necessary, but yes, a bit annoying.


1/?

>>54738461

>>not speaking in character at all

I kinda get the frustration, but some players need a bit of work to grow - my group's had one wallflower coming out of his shell and really getting into playing his character after kind of a switch was flipped


>>not taking the initiative to the point where the GM asks "so you are doing [obvious way forward]?"

A fair frustration, but sometimes you as the GM just plain don't do a good enough job of telegraphing your railroad

>>making genderless / bisexual / transgender characters

Eh, I've seen bisexuals work out just fine, and it'd make very little sense for, say, a Warforged to have a gender. And trans characters are fine if they actually make use of the magical items in the setting to set things right and then never complain again

>>spouting tumblrisms in-game

Yeah, fair

>>having the GM create an entire adventure involving the character's backstory including a huge ruined castle with over 200 areas, then quitting the campaign

I'll take "Things that never happened" for 500, Alex

>>inviting his girlfriend to the game

If she stays, she plays.

>>using the "world made of magic" argument for why his fighter can conjure tools not listed on his character sheet

That's just being a powergaming fuckstick.

>>abusing vaguely worded abilities and getting into semantic debates

Fair and reasonable frustration. Talk to your player like an adult

>>getting salty when they take a critical hit

To be fair, some systems have exploding damage or the like and I've personally had a character be taken from full health to dead because of that before, or knocked out in i.e. D&D before my turn in initiative due to high damage from a crit. Kinda sucks.

Besides, players get attached to their characters, you turbo autist.

>>blaming the DM when they run into an "unbalanced encounter"

Anon, are you pulling a JRPG "supposed-to-lose" fight, or waving your GM willy about and throwing cryohydras at level 3 characters?

>>54738482


>>whining about a player using his own knowledge of a monster then retroactively justifying it with a knowledge roll, then continuing to get salty over it 30 minutes later

I...what?

>>wanting to play a non-core race

Sometimes Non-core is an actual viable alternative and not just snowflake wank, but I understand where you're coming from.

>>wanting to play a non-core class

Sometimes a better alternative than >Suck
or
>Be caster

>>saying that core wizards will break the campaign then realizing an actual campaign isn't his theorycrafted hugbox and getting BTFO then getting salty about it

Some GMs are too permissive with the theorycrafting fucknuggets, though, and let the 3.5 caster supremacy meme actually rule the day. Silly of the mofo to get salty though.

>>trying to plan the campaign for the DM then complaining when a "sidequest" takes longer than 2 sessions

What the fuck even goes on in the mind of such people. That said, "sidequests" can really fucking suck, especially if they're focused on one character and their redemption and nothing else, and just sometimes it's like pulling teeth - I'm looking at you, priest, you know who you are.

>>actually using the word "sidequest" in character.

Actual legitimate gripe.

>>54738187
Nigga. You use a shield like a sled. Put everything including the backpack on the sled. Even better is he doesn't lose value on the sled shield when he sells it. Sell that one on the D&D version of etsy at a mark up because "Vintage."

Not my fault y'all can't IMAGINATION

>>54738170
I run games irl. I have never GMed on roll20. I played on it with friends once when a player wants to run a game but we couldn't meet up so we did roll20 instead. I fucking hated it. Oh wait I did run a couple sessions of an already-existent campaign over Skype when a player was out of state for an extended period of time, but we ended up playing once a month during that time because we'd all rather just play IRL for fuck's sake.

>>54736662
I've handled the whole loot thing a few different ways.

My first attempt was just to rule that any dungeon that would be "safe" when the players finished their objective would be automatically looted. I didn't really like this though since it left a lot of tallying to keep track of, and it always frustrated my players when they got to the end only to have some of the more lucrative dungeons come crashing down and trap everything inside after their escape, or for reinforcements to show up and make them have to enter again to get everything.

So then I tried creating a mage spell, Midas Touch. It would convert a target item into its value in gold pieces. This led to further munchkining where players would instead sneak around town Midas Touching whatever they could find with high value, and a certain wizard who replaced all of his spells with Midas Touch, and then wrote Midas Touch scrolls, and finally a Midas Touch potion, which didn't work as planned since the value of living entities was usually low, but did function as a wonderful assassination item leaving only a bit of gold dust behind by whoever drank it.

Finally, I just lowered the resale value of most dungeon loot to nil by either making enemy weapons out of worthless materials and boosting their damage with buffs and higher stats, loot was provided as either a specific item (Magic swords/armor/etc) or as a valuable object (Gemstones, statuettes, etc.).

During all this, there was a player who took a page out of Dungeon Siege and had several packmules follow him around everywhere, which caused great frustration to the rest of the party because of the time spent managing them and the complete lack of stealth or flexibility the group had. This culminated in the player refusing to navigate places where his mules couldn't follow, and made frontal assaults the only choice for a lot of places.

>>54738461
>What's wrong with getting happy that a good thing has happened?
Because it's a 1 in 20 occurrence you don't need to have a fucking orgasm each time like my group does.
>I see where you're coming from, but have had great players with depression and shitty ones w/o
The problem is not the depression, it's them constantly bringing it up, or using it as an excuse not to attend games.
>At some point, you get kind of tired of being passive observers to one guy doing his specialty that few others tend to be able to help with, see also Shadowrun and hacking
Except those same players will also take the spotlight for an entire session and no one else got mad because they were being polite.
>Letting your players out and out buy magical items.
Yeah I do allow this, assuming the store actually has the one they want, which is rare.
>Understandable, but some people really like things to be narratively satisfying, and that's not necessarily a crime. Talk to your players, you fucking sperg.
That's fine except when they do this during the fucking game. Or trying to narratively control the story and make the whole thing into some gay-ass creative writing exercise. If we're going to do that, we might as well play FATE instead of D&D and stop pretending we are roleplaying.

Also quit fucking reddit spacing, you don't need to hit the Enter key twice after every line. It makes your post look like spaced out gibberish. It's disgusting.

>>54738482
>I kinda get the frustration, but some players need a bit of work to grow
They've had almost 7 years to grow. It's not gonna happen and it's not up to me to babysit them anymore.
>A fair frustration, but sometimes you as the GM just plain don't do a good enough job of telegraphing your railroad
It's not a railroad at all. They literally do fuck-all when presented with the situation. They don't ask additional questions, they don't take initiative. Only one player did that and he quit the group because his girlfriend died.
>I've seen bisexuals work out just fine
Yeah, so long as they shut the fuck up about it. Which they almost never do.
>I'll take "Things that never happened" for 500, Alex
Hahahahahaha oh I wish it had never happened, that's a dozen hours of my life I can never get back. At least it was fun to make. Oh and this fucking nigger knew I was doing all this work, too, but no he wanted to hang out with his 400 pound girlfriend on Friday nights instead. Fuck him.
>If she stays, she plays.
I wish she'd just piss off. She gets involved in the story then starts skipping sessions. Like most women, she doesn't give a fuck about the game, only the beta orbiters.
>That's just being a powergaming fuckstick.
It's the same when they want to do unrealstic bullshit without the aid of magic or high skills.
>Talk to your player like an adult
They just get pissy and start lashing out passive aggressively and never hear the end of it. Worst part is the player found out his class is underpowered so now he feels entitled to DM pandering.

>>54738745

>Because it's a 1 in 20 occurrence you don't need to have a fucking orgasm each time like my group does.

I mean, sure, if they're actually shrieking like howler monkeys at every nat20, fine. Otherwise, I do figure a little "Yes!" or somesuch is fine.

>The problem is not the depression, it's them constantly bringing it up, or using it as an excuse not to attend games.

Okay, that's legitimate

>Except those same players will also take the spotlight for an entire session and no one else got mad because they were being polite.

Well there's a bunch of fucking context we didn't have before. Fucking cunt.

>Yeah I do allow this, assuming the store actually has the one they want, which is rare.

I guess that's fine, even if magic item stores really cheapens the experience for me

>That's fine except when they do this during the fucking game. Or trying to narratively control the story and make the whole thing into some gay-ass creative writing exercise. If we're going to do that, we might as well play FATE instead of D&D and stop pretending we are roleplaying.

Yeah, okay, if people are completely trying to circumvent or bend the rules, then I get it


Also, nigga, I have never been to plebbit, I just have some fucking compassion on poor fucks trying to read the thread and not wanting to be assaulted by walls of text.

>>54738482
>Besides, players get attached to their characters, you turbo autist.
Yeah so did I but I didn't throw a bitch fit even when my first character died when I was a fucking 12 year old child. Thirteen years later I expect people to be a bit more mature.
>waving your GM willy about and throwing cryohydras at level 3 characters?
They cannot expect that everything they run into is a fight they can win. They need to pick and choose their battles. If I was being "realistic" they would have a good chance of running into owlbears at level 1 and maybe even being ambushed by them and dying in the first encounter. I don't pull that shit, but when they see an orc one-shot the orc leader that beat up two party members, they decide "yeah let's attack"? Or they run into an owlbear knowing that it takes an experienced fighter to fell such a beast, and they are level 1? Or they rush into a challenging encounter 2-3 levels above them (which is perfectly fair game) without scouting or thinking at all? If you think that having encounters of level above the PCs is a dick GM move, then you are the kind of cancer that is killing D&D. Stop metagaming, stop whining, stop doing all this other gay shit and just play the fucking game.

>>54738844

>They've had almost 7 years to grow. It's not gonna happen and it's not up to me to babysit them anymore.

7 years a spineless beta DM

>It's not a railroad at all. They literally do fuck-all when presented with the situation. They don't ask additional questions, they don't take initiative. Only one player did that and he quit the group because his girlfriend died.

Shitty players for what sounds like a less-than-engaging DM

>It's the same when they want to do unrealstic bullshit without the aid of magic or high skills.

Wow, you've got shitty players. You either deserve better and are too spineless to get it, or you deserve these fucks

>They just get pissy and start lashing out passive aggressively and never hear the end of it. Worst part is the player found out his class is underpowered so now he feels entitled to DM pandering.

This is fucking cartoonish. How have you not just fucking quit yet?

>Yeah so did I but I didn't throw a bitch fit even when my first character died when I was a fucking 12 year old child. Thirteen years later I expect people to be a bit more mature.

What is empathy, you shitheaded chucklefuck

>They cannot expect that everything they run into is a fight they can win. They need to pick and choose their battles.

Not entirely untrue, but holy fuck, dude, read the goddamn room. Work with your players, not against them. At the same time, they also need the stupid beaten out of them, but they clearly have been enabled for too long, and are now set in their ways.
Good going.

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>>54737148
>Implying rules are always there for a reason

The thing about tabletop RPGs is anyone can make them.

>>54738693
>I handled this poorly in many ways

>>54738500
>I...what?
They got mad that a player knew X monster was immune to X, then he rolled a planar knowledge check to justify it, then the players continued to argue saying that his character shouldn't have known to make the knowledge check (???) because it was started with out of character knowledge.
>Sometimes Non-core is an actual viable alternative and not just snowflake wank, but I understand where you're coming from.
I don't care if it's a viable alternative. I'm sick of putting new races in my setting. Kitchen sink settings suck more shit than a toilet drain at a Chipolte's restaurant. Fuck that.
>Sometimes a better alternative than suck of be caster
Then play a spellcaster. No one is stopping you. Playing a special snowflake class does nothing to fix that.
>What the fuck even goes on in the mind of such people.
He wanted a sidequest for his character but didn't want it to take up time then got pissed at me for turning it into an actual adventure. Even though they weren't doing shit as it was.

>>54738943
>7 years a spineless beta DM
Kill yourself faggot. I've DMed more games and created more enjoyment for these people than you have probably ever brought to anyone. And despite everything I'm bitching about I still enjoyed it, and got to game more than you probably ever will. Now, get off 4chan, you need to keep an eye on the little guy, if you wife gets home from clubbing with Tyrone and Jamal and finds out you haven't changed her son's diaper she might not give you sex this month.
>Shitty players for what sounds like a less-than-engaging DM
See, I don't have this problem with my other group, who say I am a very engaging and flexible GM. So, no, they just suck ass at playing these games. Also, when I play, I take the fucking initiative.
>Wow, you've got shitty players. You either deserve better and are too spineless to get it, or you deserve these fucks
I choose to continue DMing for them. So I guess what I "deserve" doesn't really matter.
>This is fucking cartoonish. How have you not just fucking quit yet?
Because have you seen the desperation in roll20 threads? A stable group of good friends to play RPGs with is like being a millionaire with a banging hot girlfriend, in RPG terms. Sure they have a lot of issues but it's better than what most fa/tg/uys have.
>What is empathy, you shitheaded chucklefuck
What is, expecting a modicum of maturity?
>Not entirely untrue, but holy fuck, dude, read the goddamn room.
You mean, suck their cocks because that's what they want?
>Work with your players, not against them.
I do, faggot, I basically created the entire campaign around their shitty backstories and gave them shittons of opportunity to develop and pursue their individual goals. They did nothing. They want to be spoonfed. Fucking millenials.
>Good going.
You think this is my fault? I didn't teach them to be like this.

>>54737348

Jesus, how many more buzzwords could you have fit in there?

>>54736662
Most of that sounds like his basic starting gear. The only thing that's tricky to carry is the spears and shields.

Of course, this is also only a problem if you A) encourage players to scrounge for every bit of loot by making them think mundane weapons are really worth anything to re-sell, B) don't give your players easy access to some sort of cart or wagon that would allow them to carry this loot, as well as the hundreds of pounds of gold they'll surely get later on, and C) actually caring where he's carrying all this stuff and if he has his hands free, when apparently the dungeon is already empty and there's nothing that would demand his attention.

If he did get surprised in a fight, it wouldn't take any sort of action to drop all that crap anyway. It might break, but who really cares?

>>54739266
Jesus, how much more of a useless pointless reply could you have made?

>>54737554

You should be more sensitive to mental disorders, given the huge amount of autism you're showing.

>>54737800

Or they also have other deep seated mental disorders. There are no absolutes, you can't just lump everyone into one set and call it a day. Yes, it's pretty much the most selfish thing you can do but they still deserve help.

>>54737072
I'm really sorry about this, I do it a lot. The problem is that my brain tells me to get the information, then inform, instead of inform, get information, inform again. I skip a step this way which can be useful, games always get bogged down, but I know it's important. I once got a very large critical success on an action I hadn't declared with permanent consequences and I still feel bad about that even though the ref gave it to me.

>>54739326

>bitching about useless replies while making pointless replies

>>54737662
Honestly, a sadistic part of me wants them to fucking goes through with their suicidal moaning, especially when some of their complaints are so first-world problem that I can't wrap my head around it.

I know depression is debilitating, even if I can't understand your reason. Fuck, I used to go through some bad time myself. Still, at least go see a psychiatrist or something cause none of your gamebuddoez are qualified as life counselor.

Bringing your personal shit into the game kills the one thing that brighten up my shitty week.

>>54737662
>but you are just human filth if you really think people should kill themselves.
They shouldn't because it's incredibly selfish and cowardly, but they deserve to die in the first place for being so amazingly selfish and cowardly.

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>>54739439
SARCASM ALERT
So why not kill them yourself? If you don't want to put up with bullshit and they're the problem, then solve it for them instead of expecting them to solve it themselves.

>>54739480
Because eugenics is unfortunately illegal, anon.

>>54738693
Yeah it looks like you fucked up multiple times. Especially the midas touch on the gold pieces. That kind of weird "meta" mechanic / item just drives me nuts. My DM had something similar, he had chests that would teleport the loot back to town for us once we "completed a level." Whole thing felt like a video game. He's also teleported us and outright used his "DM powers" to move us to other planes. Like, that was the in-game explanation, too.

>>54739331
I don't have autism, though. Like, it's been proven with a fucking test. Unless not tolerating bullshit like (((depression))) is considered to be autism.

>>54738875
>Otherwise, I do figure a little "Yes!" or somesuch is fine.
Except when they call it out and the entire table laughs. Fuck it.
>Okay, that's legitimate
Yeah damn right it is. Glad you see sense on something at least.
>Well there's a bunch of fucking context we didn't have before. Fucking cunt.
I literally put it in the post. Read further up the thread and read my posts again.
>Yeah, okay, if people are completely trying to circumvent or bend the rules, then I get it
No they are trying to circumvent events taking place naturally in the game because they suck at roleplaying and want me to do it for them.

>>54737348
>core only

You're boring. Every other point you make is right though.

>magic item shop
Do people actually frame things this way? All I do is tell the GM what it is I'm getting for my character and we work together on how that appears in the story.

>>54737404
>letting players BUY magic items
>yeah that'd set off some alarms

Depending on the system this is the correct way to do it. 3.5/PF is the obvious one, where magic upgrades and weaponry are baked into CR. The game makes the assumption that players are completing their "builds" in a certain amount of time (the time is usually expressed in wealth-by-level, but Pathfinder actually has systems where players automatically get the equivalent of "Belt/Headband of X" or "Magic Weapon +X" at certain level-based benchmarks), and if the GM is not making those items available to the players by those times he is literally doing it wrong.

There's nothing stopping you from just figuring out what stats they need and having all of those items coincidentally drop or something, but that's far less efficient (and more work for you) than just letting them buy the damn things, and it seems kind of disingenuous to boot.

Now, if we're talking about something like Lamentations of the Flame Princess then sure, it's made explicit that the equivalent of the magic marketplace doesn't exist and the game isn't intended to support it. But it's worth pointing out that not every game is LotFP. It seems like every GM's first instinct when handling magic items is "they should be powerful and rare! The players realistically shouldn't be able to expect to purchase the ones they need with any degree of consistency!", which, while probably realistic, breaks some games.

For example, the Pathfinder Fighter who cannot for the life of him find a belt of +physical stat is literally being denied the intended game experience.

>>54737554
>Well depression isn't a real thing, for one.
Well damn, is the person behind this post a team of medical researchers with MDs and PhDs? I thought it was just some fuck in his mom's basement.
But please, enlighten us, anon; where is your peer-reviewed journals suggesting you're correct?

>>54739514
I mean, you're here.

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>"My character is fat"

>>54739144
>They got mad that a player knew X monster was immune to X, then he rolled a planar knowledge check to justify it, then the players continued to argue saying that his character shouldn't have known to make the knowledge check (???) because it was started with out of character knowledge.
Obviously they don't know the whole 'I know trolls are weak to fire, but let's roll to see if my character does' trick.

>>54736974
What? I ran a basic as fuck dnd campaign and it lasted nearly a fucking year and was only starting to wrap up, relax you fucking baby.

>>54737141
you're an outrageous faggot. just saying. but most roleplayers are these days it seems.

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>>54740736
So witty, anon; have a (you) for (you)r vast and amazing intellect.

>>54737348
>>54737507
Why do you even bother playing if all this shit upsets you?

>>54736713
I do this shit all the time.
>GM: It's an espionage game guys!
>Me: Guess I'll make a 'Go Loud' character to fill the niche if/when we fuck up
>Everyone else has does the same
>We are AMPLIFIED

>>54737800
>>54739439
>>54739390

How the fuck is committing suicide "Selfish"

>>54743190
It's incredibly inconsiderate to pretty much everyone who knows you; not only do they now have to mourn, they also have to deal with the possibility that they could have done something about whatever warning signs you were throwing off and didn't.

>>54737569
Bullshit, even in high magic the "ye olde magic shoppe" trope is still a vidya flavored crap solution.

If you treat magic like mundane stuff it will stop being 'magical'.
Magic can be powerful, pervasive abundant... but never expected. The 'magic shop' archetype isn't consistent enough to fit in said concept, unless it's elaborated in a convincing way.

E.g. if my players in my high magical setting ask about some place where buy 'magical charms' some npc will say to them "well.. there are stories about an old hag living by the woods who, they say, will be willing on selling strange, sorcerous objects to whomsoever is willing on face some 'risks'"

>>54744420
Generally agree with you.

Also if you're going to have a "Magic Shoppe" in the middle of a city, don't give it a set catalog. All things should be ordered on demand with a big chance of some sort of failure to make the item or the player getting gypped by the shopkeeper.

>>54743190
Because it totally destroys any and all investment anyone had in you as a person; whether it be physical, emotional, economic, etc.

As an act, it is extremely costly (you die) for an immediate benefit (you don't feel bad anymore), but is ultimately nothing more than an impulsive act to "fix" a problem.

It's effectively saying "I feel so fucking shit all the time, I'm actually going to kill myself to escape this torment. Ignore the fact that while it'll get rid of suffering, it'll also get rid of EVERYTHING, and I'm potentially leaving behind loved ones or friends because of my own selfish cowardice to just take the easy way out and not actually deal with my problems."

Fuck suicidals, and fuck anyone who calls them "brave".

It's wrong to kill yourself, but they should anyways because of just how much of a shit person they are to even consider it seriously in the first place.

>>54738943
>Wow, you've got shitty players. You either deserve better and are too spineless to get it, or you deserve these fucks

In either of those cases he deserves it though.

>>54737330
>Player tries his hardest to "roll" his stats out of view/on his own

What a surprise, the lowest roll was a 14

Hell, I'd even say
>Insisting on stat roll for a low level start campaign

>>54744847
>Somebody feels so bad they want to kill themselves despite all these things I'm bringing up
>Fuck them, they should continue being miserable for my sake because I enjoy having them as a bobblehead around my life
>They're the ones who are selfish
Of all the stupid arguments that are non-conducive to actually helping anybody this is the worst and most prevalent. The only purpose it serves is high-horsing and guilt-tripping. Let's make the person who already feels like a burden and full of guilt feel even worse! I'm helpful! Stupid.

Suicidal deserve reality checks and compassion, not self-entitled holier-than-thous such as yourself. I dearly hope you never interact with one. There's also a significant chance you were one yourself. If the only thing keeping you alive is guilt then please seek help. I mean it.

>>54739559
You're autistic because you're a sad fuck and one of the worst GMs I've ever heard about. I am genuinely sorry that not just your players, but other human beings, must interact and deal with you on a regular basis. Given your responses and opinions throughout this thread, I can safely say that you would be a nightmare to have a simple conversation with, let alone play an RPG with.

Kill yourself, you absolute cuckold. Nobody will even notice you're gone.

>>54737148
Usually the reason is that the writer is an autistic grognard who is more concerned with building a medieval peasant simulator than an actual fun game.

>>54737770
Mang
I can tell you from experience that you're totally full of shit

>>54746081
Only on /tg/ could you find someone so autistic that they would claim that deleting yourself from the lives of everyone who loves you and cares about you isn't inherently a cruel and short-sighted thing to do.

When you commit suicide, you vanish from the lives of the people who care about you. They don't get to say goodbye or hello or bullshit with you ever again. You just decide that they aren't worth seeing anymore, and fuck their feelings, because yours are so much more important. Death is fucking permanent and people don't seem to get that. Those people are going to walk through life knowing that their friend is fucking dead and there wasn't anything they could do to help. It's a really unpleasant thing you force upon other people, for chemical imbalances in the brain. Nightmarish though these problems might be, they do not warrant an action so drastic that it scars everyone around you for the rest of their lives.

>>54737241
The encumbrance rules are there because no-one gives a fuck, anon.

>>54746734
>M-muh fee-fees!
That only applies to people directly within the family. Odds are anybody beyond first cousins won't give a shit.
Take it from me. My uncle killed himself for no readily apparent reason about 10 years ago. It sucks, but everyone aside from my grandmother has moved on. If I were to ask my father or other uncle about him, they wouldn't break into tears, at least not in front of me. They'd say "What a shame, I miss him," but then they'd get on with their lives.

>>54737554
>Well depression isn't a real thing, for one.
Oh, another of THESE retards.

>>54736498

> Player complains that other players take too long with their turns
> Same player takes the longest to take a turn

>>54746734
>Death is fucking permanent and people don't seem to get that
Everyone dies anyway, so fucking what.

>>54746734
Not that anon, but surely there are circumstances when suicide is okay.
I spent four years being indoctrinated into sex slavery by my stepfather, and obviously I didn't actually kill myself, but I wanted to every day until I got out of there.
He was three times my size, controlled all my funds, and arranged things such that I was isolated from everyone except him most of the time and he could keep a constant eye on me. He sabotaged my relationship with my mother and every attempt I made at making friends.
He raped me every week, and threatened me with death in front of company, framing it to look like a harmless joke. The message was clear: "I can get away with whatever I want."
He placed himself in a position of abolute dominance and ruthlessly cut off every means of resistance or escape. There was simply nothing else I could do to change the situation, and the only reason I got out was luck.
Under those circumstances, would suicide have been acceptable?

>>54746973
Patricide would have been.

>>54746973
Yeah, what >>54746995 said. If you're gonna kill somebody, why kill the innocent one and let the guilty party get away with it?

>>54746995
I agree, but it's also very illegal, and decades of more of the same in prison didn't really appeal to me.

>Forces rolled stats for a "long game"
>Asks for 5 page backstory for a "short game" or for a "deathly game"
>Core only, specially on worst editions
>Human only when the setting has many races
>"This NPC is going to acompany you because I think your group is weak"
>Refluffs his class into something different and expects to bend rules to favour that fluff
>I'm the last one, the chosen one, of this special family, etc

>>54746430
Now I know you've never actually played with those rules.

>>54747358
I agree with him on pound-based systems. Adding up many double-digit numbers into a triple-digit number sucks.

Item count or encumbrance-based systems are fine though.

>>54746081
Your problem is that you're still thinking on an individualistic mindset, as evidence by
>>Fuck them, they should continue being miserable for my sake because I enjoy having them as a bobblehead
No, it's not for MY sake, it's for EVERYONE's sake. They owe it to EVERYONE that they interact with, whether it be their significant other to work friends they chat around the water cooler with.
They are part of this world; they have a place, no matter how small, and they have duties and responsibilities to the world and to others around them.
Killing themselves, shirking all those duties and responsibilities and personal connections, is nothing more than utmost selfishness and cowardice. It shows that they care only about themselves and their feelings, to the point that they'd kill themselves just to stop suffering.

>>54746845
>m-muh fee-fees!
That is literally all suicidals are. Selfish failures of people that think their feelings, their emotions, their suffering, take precedence over everyone else.
They are cowardly because they have given up hope that things might get better, that life is worth living, and that they believe that they are too week to fix themselves.

>>54746955
>Everyone dies anyway, so fucking what.
And? Die when the time comes by natural occurrence or by the action of another; willfully ending your own life (in exceptions such as terminal illness or extreme age) tells only two things. One, you've given up hope and stopped caring, and/or two, you think life and everyone around you isn't worth your time.

>>54746973
I'm very sorry to hear all that, anon, but the fact that you escaped at all proves that suicide wasn't the right choice. There's always an out, no matter how slim or unlikely, but there is always an out.
Suicide is tantamount to accepting failure; no matter how unlikely escaping or surviving is, suicide ensures that you will never escape or survive.

>>54747574
>And? Die when the time comes by natural occurrence or by the action of another; willfully ending your own life (in exceptions such as terminal illness or extreme age) tells only two things. One, you've given up hope and stopped caring, and/or two, you think life and everyone around you isn't worth your time.
Suicide isn't a selfish action, but a nihilistic one.

>>54747574
>>54747622
Guuuuuys stahp
I'm listening on this thread for related content, not your stupid bickering

>>54747574
Way to miss my point. Part of your argument was that suicide affects the family's and friends' feelings. My points were that
>the feelings are usually limited to the immediate circle of family and friends
>family and friends eventually move on
A suicide isn't going to leave everyone the person has ever met with Metal Gear-tier PTSD. People move on. Sure, they obviously owe things to others, but it works both ways. If they're depressed or whatever enough to become a burden, then they might as well leave. Maybe not fatally, but definitely out of everyone's way.

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>>54747733
Also, I have double dubs so I order everyone to return to complaining about TTRPG warning signs instead of playing Freud. Here's my biggest warning sign:
>I've never played the system before
Lurkmoar. Watch some sessions and RTFM before jumping in.

>>54747786
>Lurkmoar. Watch some sessions and RTFM before jumping in.
Neither watching other people play nor RTFM is playing, so what you're essentially saying is that no-one should ever play anything. Get out of /tg/, faggot.

>>54747622
Nihilism is selfishnes.

>>54747733
>A suicide isn't going to leave everyone the person has ever met with Metal Gear-tier PTSD.
You're right, people do move on. Ultimately, people are replaceable, but my point is not just limited to immediate emotional harm on the part of the dead's family.
They have obligations and responsibilities to not only their loved ones, but to their community and world at large. They are a part of society, and other people depend on them in ways both small and large.
Finally, suicide denies what they could have done in the future. Unlike other forms of death, suicide is 100% preventable; it's entirely on them for being so selfish as to think that their immediate suffering is greater than the rest of their life.

You and I both know that it's not only sunless NEETs who sit in their bedroom all day that commit suicide.

>>54747858
>Nihilism is selfishnes.
No it isn't.

>>54747846
This is for before joining, dumbass. I've dealt with players before that have offered to join a campaign despite knowing jack shit about the system.

>>54737743
>where all you do is go to the dungeon, kill everyone, and then go back to town
Why don't you just play a video game instead?

>>54747882
>This is for before joining, dumbass.
But you said "never having played" before is the warning sign, not "not doing your homework"

>>54737348
Hey man, getting excited when someone crits in a big fight is awesome.

Most of the rest I agree with but you're a bit anal about the IC / OOC stuff

>>54747867
It is

>>54748156
Acknowledging that you're meaningless is in many ways the exact opposite of selfishness.

>>54748267
It also acknowledges that everyone and everything else is equally meaningless.
In an arithmetic sense, it implies that you are equal to the sum of everything and everyone else.

>>54737698
Please Do.

>>54736587
If they don't they are doing it wrong and eat shit at being a game master. Period.

>>54736662
This shit ain't skyrim. Skyrim fags need to get out.

>>54748786
>If they don't they are doing it wrong and eat shit at being a game master. Period.
90% of the time it's meaningless busywork that does nothing whatsoever to make the experience better for people who don't do it without being told to. You're just autistic.

>>54738967
>>54746430
>the writer is an autistic grognard
sometimes
>the writer is selling something to a hobby audience with a massive austistic grognard demographic
always

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>>54737348
>>getting excited when they roll a natural 20
It's something that doesn't happen often and is a good thing so yes people will be happy when it happens
>>having depression or any kind of "soft" mental disorder
This is uncontrollable and generally doesn't make a difference, it's like saying "having green eyes" or something
>>wanting to play a non-core race
Fuck you, frog people are fun and not evertone wants to be an elf ranger, dwarf cleric or human fighter again
>>wanting to play a non-core class
It's fun to be able to punch stuff without being a religious nerd, or to make potions without taking 10 feats, or to hit stuff and cast spells without being level 15 and taking a prestige class and multiclassing

>>54736498
I played with a guy like that once that was an insufferable douchebag.
As It so happens, he was invited to go camping with a group of friends that went every other weekend when we were in our early 20ies. When we go camping we pack everything we need to survive and hike 5 to 7 miles in to set up camp.
This guy predictably brought 8 billion pounds of bs gear he's never need and damned near died by the time we got to camp. It proved a massive point to him because we all are in the same game group (besides him) and nagged his bitch ass about it all weekend

>>54737698
So is this all one dude or what? Is his name Alex?

>>54739689
Sometimes I do, but only for stuff that I wouldn't consider rare in my settings (I tend to run very high magic games). It's not like you can just go buy a talking sword down at the corner store or something

>>54737151
Sounds more like Doomguy to me.

>>54746973
Hot.
Sure hope you're a girl because I'm fapping right now

>>54749887
hope you like traps

>>54737348
>playing D&D: the post
Wow. Stop...everything.

>>54750910
i'm pretty sure this guy has been posting on /tg/ over the last week complaining about literally every single thing a human being is capable of doing.

he was in the roll20 red flags thread, and now this one, and i'm not convinced he wasn't the guy complaining about a woman existing in /5eg/ either.

dude needs a mental health check.
that's not a joke. this isn't good.

>>54736498
>rolls a die off the table
>picks it up, then shows a 20 to everyone and tries to argue it's still valid

>someone else rolls a die off the table and yells "still valid!" well before the die lands
>tries to argue it's invalid

Both of these are annoying on their own, but apparently it's possible to have them in the same player.

I know this isn't the best outlet to tell my story, but I hope this helps anyone feeling suicidal.
Dungeons and Dragons saved my life.
When I turned 18, I tried to kill myself. Problems with family, friends, and my education convinced me that it was better to end my life than continue on in suffering. I attempted to overdose on prescription meds and nearly died. After the long period of "rehab" and therapy, I was released. I had lied and told everyone I was feeling better and that my feelings had changed. They hadn't. It all changed however when I decided to play a small game of Dungeons and Dragons with my brother and his group of friends. The DM's name was Josh. Josh is my savior.

This was my second time ever playing Dungeons and Dragons. While planning my character, the DM decided to do point-buy for stats. I was shy and kept looking at my character, and in that moment something came over me. I looked Josh in the eye and said "Point-buy? What? Why can't I roll for stats? That's not fair."
He looked at me with an annoyed look in his eyes. My cock twitched. I felt the urge to smirk but fought it. He got pissed off at the tiniest bit of whining and I loved it. I dug in again. "Everyone wants to point-buy, but I want to roll. I almost killed myself recently. What? Do you hate people with depression?!"
He shifted awkwardly and I could tell he was biting his tongue and my cock was rock hard. He eventually gave in to my whining.
That session was incredible. Every time I'd roll, I'd wait until after my roll was finished to detail what I was doing. And when Josh looked at me, I would fudge my roll to a natural 20 right in front of him. He tried to stop me but he was powerless. I'd always reply with "That's not fair!" and he was powerless to stop me. I think I came my pants 4 times that session. From that day forward, my life had gained meaning. I was born to piss off Josh the DM.

>>54736498
I have a player like this. He can't roleplay weakness very well, so if a character he's playing turns out to, for example, not be able to carry 50lbs, he spews salt for an hour over how "broken" carry weight rules are.

He doesn't seem to grasp what 9 Strength means.

My DM to be has a furry avatar on Roll20 and a pony on DiscOrd, how fucked am I?

>>54743916
If your suffering was really that bad and protracted through the years they're selfish for wanting you to keep living through that to stop them being sad. Being suicidally depressed can be worse than the sadness of losing a loved one.

>>54736662
Anime campaigns never care about looting. Who cares about a fucking bandits 8 spears when your soul manifests a blade of pure soulstuff.

Looting is a symptom of DnD.

>>54744420
Depend how magic is the setting, if magic is something common then a magic shop is a logical thing

>>54752730
I actually like the way 5e handles it in the DMG, fluffwise(and I'm not a fan of magic mart overall)
It says that by default, while there is a market for magic items, it's very exclusive and elite, operates not unlike the market for antiquities and fine art, and has the exact same tendency to attract thieves.
The uninitiated might have trouble finding someone to sell their magic items to, since only very wealthy collectors can afford them, and it might not always be possible to buy an item with money; owners might expect them to pay off the cost in services rendered(i.e. quests)

>>54752071
Depends on how willing you are to put on a horse costume

>>54737072
*rolls dice without saying a word*
>I attack with my bow
>Ok roll for it
>But I just did
>You playing with the dice before declaring does not count

If they ignore you telling them, just let them roll that 20, celebrate and then dryly tell him to do the actual roll now.
He will forget the 100 times you tell him, but he will remember the one time it cost him his 20.

>tfw nothing to plan at work because I stayed up till 4am planning stuff by accident
I'm so fucking bored

Someone post some interesting side quest ideas

>>54751122
Check'd and kek'd.
Here's mine

>planning on killing myself to avoid paying taxes
>friend invites me to play homebrew campaign
>two other friends are there, but the last guy can't make it because he was deported
>we start and things go smoothly for about two hours
>huge battle breaks out in game
>enemy commander is out in front lines killing everyone
>decide to shoot him because fuck that
>DM doesn't bother to roll and says the bullet doesn't do anything because he is wearing plate armor
>he proceeds to throw his weapon (a pike apparently) which not only kills my character, but everyone else in my party who was apparently behind me
>i try to protest this and say my character was wearing chain mail
>DM suddenly turns red
>ITS PRONOUNCED MAILLE YOU STUPID MOTHERFUCKER
>the sheer force of his rage plasters everyone against the opposite wall
>I HAVE 20 YEARS OF YOUTUBE EXPERIENCE AND I WILL NOT TOLERATE THIS PEDESTRIAN TRIPE IN MY HOUSEHOLD
>the windows shatter but everything else is fine because the guy has a fetish for acoustic dampening foam
>DM flips table so hard that it instantly achieves escape velocity and blows out the roof of the house
>FRATELLI D'ITALIA L'ITALIA S'E DESTA
>police arrive on scene
>the nightmare is finally over
>nope
>get shot for tax evasion

Probably goes without saying, but I ended up not going through with the suicide attempt.

>>54738042
Come work in retail, we have much to teach you.

>>54736713
I remember once, our DM pitched a game that was a high fantasy political campaign set in not!China.

I rolled up a charismatic cleric of a foreign deity trying to improve his god's standing via political means.
The others played a murderhobo paladin and a Turkish oil wrestler.

I had to make a lot of apologies IC that game.

>>54746594
Experience being a beta fag?

>>54751049
>dude needs a mental health check.
Cause I post on /tg/? Fuck off.

>"I attack with my bow"
Okay, roll to attack
>*pulls out smartphone*
>*tap tap tap*
>...
>"Eighteen"

>>54754881
No because you don't seem to have a firm grasp on reality, causality, or social dynamics.

>DM: you enter town
>Rogue: is there a thieves' guild in it?
Doesn't matter whether it's a village of 100 or a metropolis of 10,000.

>>54737662
I agree. Lets try to keep the conversation as civil as we can.

>>54754932
Ok I don't understand this one. Why is that a red flag?

>>54754970
99% of the time, it's because the player wants to "get in on the action."
I understand that people of different alignments and goals can work together, but if one of the players starts committing crimes in what should be a safe base of operations, it puts the entire party at jeopardy while also doing something that most of them probably hugely disapprove of.
It's not a healthy thing to do when playing as part of a group.

>>54736498
>[DM describes the rough layout and contents of a room.]
>Player: "38 Perception, what do I find?"
Nigger, tell me what you're doing. If you need to roll dice at all I'll let you know what to roll and when to roll it. You don't get to find every interesting thing by yourself just because you rolled well.

>>54754997
But a thieves' guild is a safe base of operations for him. It's a source of supplies and intelligence, especially potential leads on where the party can score some cash. If anyone's displaying a red flag here, it's you.

>>54755036
If a player rolls the dice without being asked to, he's learned bad habits from bad DMs. He must be reformed. By force, if necessary.

>>54755075
A thieves' guild is a criminal enterprise. If the rest of the party find out details about it, then depending on the type of campaign some of them might be obligated to take it down.
>score some cash
The only opportunities to be had would also be illegal. If that's the sort of game you want, fine. But the vast majority of D&D groups don't form around the idea of being criminals, and if most of the party is Good, you shouldn't get tangled up with Evil.
>inb4 stealing is Neutral

Fuck, guys. Look: if your at a table, and a player or GM keeps bringing up depression, anxiety, sexual identity, trauma, or any other issues that may be disrupting play, you should talk with them.

Not to tell them that they are ruining your gaming experience, but to try and help. The odds are, if they are bringing up this sensitive subject in the group, that they have no-one else to talk to about it. Recommend that they see a psychologist to talk out their problems, and potentially a psychiatrist for medications. A GP can help create a treatment plan for them.

The social contract of the groups we all belong to should be honored with this small show of decency for our close friends. Even if they may not be your closest companion, you can show them this little compassion, right?

Now, lets get back to the actual fucking subject at hand

>>54750608
You didnt survive, He just made you a fag. Hope you think of him when you spread.

>>54755075
>>54754970
Not that guy, but from my experience:
The question itself isn't so bad, because the rogue is just asking if they have any knowledge or possibly contacts in the region involving their underworld profession. Like if there's a gang that's known to run this town or something.

The problem is that, frequently, players who bring this up regardless of whether or not it makes sense for them to know of if the town has any strategic import to make the idea make sense tend to just be looking to see if there's an easy way for them to meme their profession all over town and pickpocket, rob, or murder every NPC they can find while using "well I can sell it to [NPC Name] later" as their excuse for disrupting the session every time a new proper noun gets dropped.

>>54755126
Nah you right homie.

>>54739590
No. Playing sixty different classes until they all blend together into some inane crap, is boring.

>>54739689
Yeah I do magic shops. What of it? I try to fit the item characters want into an upcoming treasure hoard, too. Or have them meet someone to craft it for them.

>>54747929
>you're a bit anal about the IC / OOC stuff
Stop playing RPGs.

>>54748735
I ran out of much else to say, honestly.

>>54737348
This is a good list. I agree, though finding players who never commit any sins (or even doing them yourself) is hard to do.

>>54755185
I just mean LITERALLY framing it as a magic item shop. A 'magic item shop' as in you get the stuff right away is fine by me.

>>54755099
The alignment of stealing depends on the context. Is looting an orc cave evil? Fantasy thieves guilds often involve stealing from monsters rather than just uppity noblemen. A strict code of 'thief ethics' is a common trope.

Again... you allow someone to make a certain character and then refuse to let them play it. Red flag. You sound like a horribly unimaginative GM.

>>54755160
>players who ask this tend to just be looking for a way to integrate their profession into the game

holy shit you don't say

>>54739590
>>54755185
Core only is only dumb in 3.5 where core is the worst offenders in class unbalance, and where doing something like "Bo9S and Psionics only" is sensible to limit the sheer mass of classes while keeping balance and variety. Core only in other games might be more sensible.

Be reasonable, lads.

>>54755160
Yeah, that too. The thief character will tend to want solo time to do crime whenever in town.

>>54755248
Fantasy thieves guild that steal from monsters is something I have never heard of. I'm not saying I don't believe you, but from my experience they tend to steal from locals, rich and poor alike for the most part.
You can also stop making assumptions about me. That would be grand. All you know is I don't like players to play criminals. That's literally all I've said about my personal games.
>you allow someone to make a certain character and then refuse to let them play it
Why would you think I would ever allow someone to make this character in the first place? This is something I often encounter when playing in others' games, not when I DM.

>>54755285
>Fantasy thieves guild that steal from monsters
That sounds pretty rad though. Like instead of "kill em all and take their stuff" they can do shit like scouting in, sabotaging their gear and swiping some key resources to make a future engagement from local adventurers or militias more likely to succeed.

>>54755273
Maybe you shouldn't make a character whose profession is "do evil things" when playing in a campaign not centered around enabling this.

>>54755345
I agree, it would be pretty sick.
>Orcs raid the town and steal a bunch of money
>guild thief gets into their base and steals it all back
However, that's not usually what people who view their characters as "thieves" want when they seek out fellow thieves. They want relatively safe jobs stealing money from townsfolk. I've seen it too many times when playing with rogues, which is a shame because I think it's a great class with fantastic RP potential without having to resort to crime.

>>54737348

Jesus Titty-Cunting Christ on a wiffle ball bat. Are you literally autistic? Your red flags for people who will be a problem is
>is a human being
>who interacts with others
>and wants to have fun

Fuck me sideways you sound like an insufferable tool.

>>54755179
thanks bruv

>Maybe you shouldn't make a character whose profession is "do evil things" when playing in a campaign not centered around enabling this.

thieves have been a staple of the game for the past 42 years, never have they required an evil alignment. stealing isnt inherently evil. if it were, all adventuring parties would be evil by virtue of looting the baddies they kill. quit being a tool.

>>54754881

No, because you literally show markers for high functioning spectrum disorders. You're either an un-funny troll, or legitimately have Asperger's syndrome. Get checked.

>>54755437
>thieves have been a staple of the game for the past 42 years
It was the class name, but they didn't HAVE to literally be thieves. There's a reason it got changed to "rogue" - it was an effort to de-emphasize crime as a focus for the class.
>stealing isnt inherently evil
Let's say I agree. Stealing from townsfolk would still be evil.
>evil by virtue of looting the baddies... quit being a tool
Changing the subject entirely and calling me names won't change the facts. Looting monsters is nowhere near stealing from townsfolk. That second one is a Bad Thing To Do. If you want to roleplay a sociopathic criminal, do it in a campaign that caters to sociopathic criminals. Or don't be surprised when your party members won't back you up when you're in trouble.

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>>54755437
>trying to pick random people's pockets because reasons is acceptable behavior
>RIGHT after you find a chest full of cash in a dungeon
>putting your buddies in trouble as a result of your actions
>"But I'm Neutral, so it's okay."

Disregarding that the rogue is not necessarily a thief (they can be a spy, a scout, Indiana Jones archeologist, investigator, the list goes on), simply being a thief does not in any way justify being an asshat. I concur that there is nothing inherently wrong with being a thief, but the concept is very attractive to the worst types of people.

>>54755510
>>54755577
>establishing strawmen to justify your shit arguments

im sorry your players are bad, but playing the most common background of one of the most common classes is not a red flag

>>54755577
>I concur that there is nothing inherently wrong with being a thief, but the concept is very attractive to the worst types of people.
Exactly, and hence the red flag.
If you're willing to put your party in danger to do something there's no good reason for you to do, you're thoughtless at best.

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>>54755600

>>54737698
>>raping immersion constantly in every hole by making retarded anime references
Unfortunately, since my buddy was shipped to the Army (Navy? fuck I forget the branch) the only people left in the usual RP group don't actually RP and just want to wargame. I'm planning an Only War campaign to cater to this.

>that one guy bitching about the shit this one player does, only like 10% of which seem like valid complaints

And here we see a monkey with its head firmly lodged all the way up its own ass.

>>54755934
Honestly describes 95% of this thread, not just that one dude. /tg/ GMs are fucking awful apparently.

>>54746430
peasant simulator is fun, you probably want to play something gay as fuck

>>54755380
But like 70% of the basic concept of rogues is "people who commit crime"
You can use the class to play people who aren't criminals but some degree of shadiness is expected to come with the territory

>>54756489
>But like 70% of the basic concept of rogues is "people who commit crime"
Not really. The concept (nowadays) is "people who specialize in getting things others don't want them to get." Which is obviously very useful for criminals, but has a wide variety of other applications, especially for adventurers (see >>54755577).

>>54755600
That's why the red flag is them asking where the thieves guild is.

99% of the time they just want free reign to solo loot the 50 copper pieces from peasant houses and murder the people inside and then whine when the guard show up because he started raping the housewife.

Then he had the gall to accuse the other players of betraying him for not showing up to kill the guards to save his sorry ass, despite him specifically saying he left without telling anyone where he went.

He actually had the gall to say he shouldn't have been discovered because of his +11 stealth modifier which only works if you're hiding, not if you're raping someone in the middle of a hallway!

The other one percent of the time is when they want to take over the guild and they try to tries to hijack the campaign with it. I just feel glad it's easy to steer them into the main quest but it is seriously selfish to other players if they were playing any sort of good character.

>>54736587
Most enjoyable campaign I've had just finished, and did that. Also had different effects based on weather etc, such as requirements for a restful nights sleep.
It wasn't a big deal, but it meant we did have to be careful not run out of rations etc, couldn't just steal everything not nailed down etc

>>54738461
stop making holes between every line
it makes it only LESS readable

>>54737507
>>saying shit like "I only have a 12 charisma"
what's the issue if its true?

>>54739419
So, 2 :^)

>>54736713
they think "James Bond".

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>Only want to play high-level games were they get to live out their power fantasies and complain endlessly when the rest of the group decides to run a low power game
I've got a guy in my group that do this constantly. I'm running a street level shadowrun game at the moment and this dude is constantly whining that he can't build a super cyborg assassin that used to do cleanup work for Ares or that I'm stifling his creativity when I tell him such a character doesn't really fit the campaign.
He acts like the very idea of playing a game were you're scrapping by at the bottom of the food chain and working your way into being a reputable runner is the worst thing in the world.

>>54760142
That does sound pretty boring. Why does he come to game if he doesn't like it tho

>>54760289
We play at his place along with 2 of his roommates and we're essentially his only social interaction outside of his work.

>>54736498
"I always restrict the party to humans only."

>>54737348
kill yourself

>>54737698
>using phrases like "tank" and "face" while talking in character
I cannot think of a usage for "face" that would be inappropriate in character and does not involve other inappropriate words (eg face tank)

>>54752730
'Common' don't equates 'Expected'
Magic CAN be common but that doesn't imply that it as to be treated mildly. If you take away the 'mistery' that ain't magic no more

>>54761462
I guess he means someone who isn't a Prohibition era gangster talking about a fast talker/negotiator as the "face" of a gang.

Like "That's Jimmy the Face, he does the persuadin' around here, and that's Knuckles McCluskey, he does the other sorta persuadin' when folks don't listen so good"

>>54748873
Nope, sorry to inform you, but you are wrong.

>>54761637
That's far enough removed from gaming slang that it should be appropriate, regardless of setting. It's not like you are going to restrict your language in a medieval setting to only words that would have been used then, it's basically an entire different language anyway.

>>54736662
This is more a symptom of shit like Diablo or Elder Scrolls than Anime. I've never seen a shonen protagonist try to carry 8 shields, but plenty of video game characters do.

>>54754881
Spergasaurus detected. Someone get a roll of bubble wrap to keep this kiddo busy

>>54754911
Those people can fuck right off out of the game

>>54746257
Leave us autistics out of this, if he's been tested then you can't blame him on us.

>>54737348
You missed one:

>playing anything but no items, fox only, final destination

>>54736587
Funny story about that

>playing pathfinder
>the idea of the campaign was "roughing it"
>low point buy for stats, slow exp track, actual bookkeeping on food, water, and supplies.
>making a risky expedition into an area where nothing edible grows
>prepare a mule train for supplies
>run into a logistical issue where the mules also require supplies, which in turn need more mules to carry
>kinda okay at calculus IRL, my character has a lot of ranks in architecture and engineering, so I set up an optimization problem to determine the most cost-effective mule train size.
>gm realizes the campaign will turn into a series of word problems if this shit keeps up
>decides to allow us to spend X amount of gold on 'exactly the number of packmules we need' which is in flux depending on where we're going
>and thus, the quantum packmule was born.

>>54759659
Does
it
trigger
you
snowflake
?

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>>54762421

>>54737554
While I agree that sadness is being increasingly treated as a medical issue to sell antidepressants, there are measurable differences in brain activity between a healthy brain and a medically depressed one.

Granted, with all the self-diagnosing tumblfucks out there, I can see where you would draw that conclusion.

>>54755276
And PF, is also dumb in PF

>>54760354
>>54760142

>[Player] is a massive obstruction to the game/faggot who shouldn't bother showing up
>...aw man why's that??
>Oh btw we play at his house/he's the DM/some other shit that means he cannot possibly be excluded :^)

Every time. why do you fucks never mention this in the first post?

Protip: You can't expect anything to change, play at another house.

>>54737348
some of these I agree with but i also have a lower view of you as a human being now

>>54737554
>Well depression isn't a real thing, for one. Everyone is depressed and suicidal sometimes, it's a normal part of life. If I could deal with it, they can. I don't spend my time saying "yeah I'm depressed" I just shut the fuck up and get on with life. If you want to kill yourself, just do it and shut the hell up already.
There's a difference between people that have "normal" depressions in response to something like the loss of a loved one, and clinical depression. Healthy people bounce back from depression. People with disorders do not.
I do feel people are too keen to self-diagnose, but that's a separate problem. Either way we all applaud your edginess.

>>54753980
Pretty good !

>>54736587
I would be okay with that if money in D&D did not weight a fuck ton. D&D money is 50 to a pound, western European coinage was 98 to a pound. In D&D a basic sword costs 15 gold coins. In Europe is was 4 to 7 sliver coins for a newly made sword. In D&D the next step up of coinage is ten times as valuable at the 50 to a pound weight. In Europe it was 20 times as valuable, but a bit heavier at 95 coins to a pound.

> A +1 sword take 46.5 pounds of gold coins to buy

>>54737348
>>making genderless / bisexual / transgender characters

Point of contention, 'bisexual' has nothing to do with gender. Please don't lump us in with the headcase trannies, we're just disgusting hedonists.

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>>54736498
>game of thrones inspired setting

>>54761462
I mean "face tank" no joke was used IC by a character. Get. The. Fuck. Out. Of. My Group.

>>54754912
Prove it.

>>54763520

Stuff like this triggers my autism

>>54761660
Something something fagtron something something hot opinions.

>>54738529
Why not just thread all the shields together and make a large sled that doubles as a supershield against arrow bombardment?

>>54747574
Ugh dirty collectivist, shame on you for forcing people to do their bidding for you. People should live only for themselves, if they have a miserable live and feel they need to end it they should, only immoral people like you want them to live in agony.

ITT: People getting triggered because not everyone enjoys what they do.

>>54749107
So the DM is supposed to mash in a new race into his, often carefully and lovingly made, setting just because a play wants his PC to be a frog and then crack 999+ jokes about kek, kekistan and /r/altright, all of which are garbage?

>>54752381
>looting is the symptop of DnD
What? Shitty goblin spears vs your +3 sword of not!Christ?

Nobody gave a shit about those spears, he obviously intended to sell them.

>>54755425
1) Being a human being does not automatically mean you are a good player.
2) Being good at social interaction does not mean you will be a good RPG player.
3) Despite the /tg/ groupthink, ((((fun)))) is not an acceptable metric of game design or of the quality of a campaign. Fuck off.

>>54755445
>No, because you literally show markers for high functioning spectrum disorders.
Oh really? Can you please post a picture of your fucking psychology degree before you continue to make such accusations? Practicing medicine without a license is against the law, FYI.

>>54760995
Encouraging someone to commit suicide is also against the law.

>>54738239
No one cares about your whiny apathy. Get over it. You have no one to blame but yourself.
>>54746850
>my fee-fees are an actual medical condition and you should feel sorry for me
Oh, another one of these retards!
>>54762854
>stating the obvious and thinking that that refutes my point
I applaud your stupidity. That takes effort.

>>54763838
>No no no, we're not special snowflakes, we're SPECIAL special snowflakes
No one cares. Fuck off. A bisexual character is just as obnoxious as a trans character, no matter the actual distinction between the two. And yes, if you want to fuck other men / women, then you are mentally ill.

>>54762655
>there are measurable differences in brain activity between a healthy brain and a medically depressed one.
So what?

>>54759677
It's the "only". In every edition 3.0 and forward, 12 gives you a +1 bonus, meaning you're significantly above average. It's like people who play 10 int as retards.

>>54746785
And no one plays with you because you are a shit player, anon.

>>54767191
>The end goal of a game is not to have fun.
Buddy, I got news for you. Fun is literally why games exist. If your players aren't having fun in a campaign, then you're a shit GM. If your and their definitions of fun are misaligned, then leave.

I was pretty much with you until you decided that "Who cares if my game is fun, games are for me to tell people a story because I can't otherwise write/for me to be edgy/to roll dice"

>>54767264
>You have a mental illness for thinking differently.

>You don't have a mental illness for thinking differently.

To be so blind.

>>54752381

When you octuple wield them like a true gangster.

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>Sets his heart on something that doesn't exist or is rare in the setting. If there's no magic in your world, he wants to be the very last sorcerer.
>Creates characters that provide RP excuses to be a fagmaster to the other players. IE, Kender.
>Only plays one system(autist uncomfortable outside his comfort zone obsessed with optimized builds)
>Offers to play any system(desperate and/or lacks experience)
>Character is designed to only do one thing. This is a challenge to you: make the game about nothing but my favorite element or I'll be bored and left out.

>>54767191
The biggest warning sign of all.
>"Games aren't about having fun," the GM says.

>>54766510

Don't talk shit about Donald Trump you faggot cuck.

>>54737348
Most of this is totally right.
Fucking D&D bullshit.

>My character is a lesbian/bisexual woman

Reddest of red flags. Traps are less drama.

>>54767556
>kender
stopped reading right there

>>54737348

>>having depression or any kind of "soft" mental disorder

Yep. It always turns out to be a lot worse. Like when the supposed lesbian whose characters were all vehicles for hetero rape fantasies started telling me I was triggering her.

>>pointing out cliches/tropes in the campaign during actual play, out of character

At this point, aren't most of just hoping for familiar tropes rearranged in a pleasing way(ala Stranger Things)? There really isn't a lot of new group to cover.

>>inviting his girlfriend to the game

If there's no favoritism and she actually wants to play(instead of just further monopolizing her boyfriend's time), let her give it a shot.

>>abusing vaguely worded abilities and getting into semantic debates

I once did this right back to a player as a lesson.

>>wanting to play a non-core race
>>wanting to play a non-core class

Yep. I miss when DnD was about elves and wizards and so on. Not stupid shit like psionics, half-ghosts, and spellblades.

>>54737554
>Everyone is depressed and suicidal sometimes, it's a normal part of life. If I could deal with it, they can.
So you've never had depression then. If there's someone who should shut the hell up and kill himself, that person just might be you.

>>54736713
Isn't espionage about perception and bluff? Also, you may have heard of restrictions upon generation.

>>54737698
Do go on, I hate almost every one of these. Glorious.

Especially
>sexually assaulting a captured female NPC during a game in which a 13 year old child was present as a player
Like, c'mon man. You were probably warned about this, and this game's supposed to be lotr style orc-killing spree. And your reatard rape fantasies just can't be controlled? I would've either left the game or kicked the player immediately.

>>54744420
>If you treat magic like mundane stuff it will stop being 'magical'.

if you're playing D&D you've already crossed that line

making magic items rare isn't going to change the fact that most PCs have magic shooting out their ass like it's nothing

>>54751049
>Complaining about a woman existing

I refuse to believe without context which would likely implicate you as a colossal white knight.

>>54767242
:^)

>>54737151
What anime does this actually happen in?

>>54736498
>Other players tell you to "be nice" to the GM
>Other players immediately jump up and suck the GM's dick if they feel the GM is being attacked or antagonized in even the smallest way

>>54767665

This. They are the one uniformly godawful character concept.

>>54737554
did you just step out of a time machine from 2002 by any chance?

>>54768066
>attacking or antagonizing the GM in even the smallest way during session
Talk to him after the game's ended or during a break you socially inept troglodyte

>>54736498
Haven't tried this but guess I will have a go.
>"A natural 20 is ALWAYS a success, you have to let me succeed."
>"Only five points this session? blech" (Playing GURPS).
>Rolling before stating action, the saying "I already did" when asked to roll for said action.
>ROLLING FUCKING CAROUSING TO ASK FOR DIRECTIONS FOR FUCKS SAKE IT IS NOT ALWAYS NECESSARY TO ROLL IT
>INTIMIDATION AS WELL, THIS IS LITERALLY A SEGMENT ABOUT INTERROGATION, ONE ROLL IS NOT THE END OF IT, WHAT IS PACING?
>Wanting to play a beast race at war with the realm we are playing in, then complaining that they are treated poorly by public officials and the general populace.
>"I have like a greatsword, but it's like super big, like final fantasy. I marked it down as just doing extra damage, that's all."
>"Can I roll to do (thing that is most definitely physically possible and plausible in the context)?". Yes for fucks sake you can roll for it just do it you knob, I'm not your dad.
>"I only play magic users because they are better".
>"Can I have this thing? it looks cool on the character art". Thing is definitely out of question for the power level.
>Starting a "campaign" every second session, so no more than 2 sessions per character group and plotline but it's ok because "It's in the same setting".

Not sure I am doing this right, but it feels good to vent.

>>54739266
It's not his fault if you don't understand the words.

>>54739419
You started though :)

>>54768292
>playing GURPS

theres your problem

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>>54737348
I'll shorten this for you, for future threads friend.
>doing anything in any of my games

>>54768464
>not playing gurps

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>>54736498
>"Eh, I dunno, I'll come up with the backstory as the game goes"
>"How do you think my character would react to this? Ideas?"
>"I don't feel like playing this character, he doesn't seem to have nothing going for him in hindsight. Does anybody have like a table I can roll on for a background? No, not the one in the core rulebook, I tried that and didn't like it".

>>54736498
>dm says they are a literature/english major
Chances are they are insufferable pretentious cunts. I'm only speaking from experience though, maybe I'm unlucky.

>>54768292
>>"A natural 20 is ALWAYS a success, you have to let me succeed."
>requiring rolls that have a 0% chance of success
??? what did he mean by this

>>54747574
>thinking on an individualistic mindset
>problem
You belong up against a wall.

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>>54737698
>throwing dice at the wall after you roll a 1 and breaking a painting

>>54737776
It has a 51.3% chance of happening at least once over the course of 14 rolls. It's not special at all.

>>54768464
It's what my local groups plays and have played for some five years or so. Have at least gotten them to upgrade to 4e instead of 3e, but it's an uphill battle.

>>54768676
More on the likes of.
>"I hit this giant with my sword."
>Natural 20
>"I chop his head off and shove it up his ass! It's a natural 20!"
or
>Roll Acrobatics to not slip on the wet staircase
>Natural 20
>"Alright so I dance down the stairs and end with a huge leap, dazzling my part member and having swag"

And generally just the smug face they give you when they roll a nat 20, like they beat you or something.

>>54767191

>fun is not an acceptable metric of game design or of the quality of a campaign

Either go and live in a cave where no one has to see or talk to your for the rest of forever, or kill yourself. Not joking.

>>54768930
Badwrongfun can only be measured in relative terms but it still exists.

>>54767854
I was one of the players. I was told we could use a caster (shadowrun 5th was the system), and i ended up with a charisma caster with lots of resources; wealthy family, high up friends etc.

But I thought I was building to fill in niches of the team. One other player made a purely physical sneak attack guy, and then we had a sniper with an artillery gun, and... just other shit I cannot describe accurately.

Good guys. Clusterfuck campaign.

>>54768617
no you're correct. as a long term GM myself, one of my biggest early mistakes was thinking I was writing some kind of fucking story epic, instead of you know, playing a fucking game with people.

that pretension is cancer.

>>54768971

That doesn't stop fun being the ultimate goal and the base measure of GM and campaign worthiness.

>>54768617
>>54769104

Eng Lit GM is not a bad thing, as long as all the players are also Eng Lit students. Anyone who isn't is gonna think "How the fuck was I supposed to know that? From some fucking obscure Greek mythology reference? Fuk u, guy" a lot.

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>GM consistently underestimates PC's strength with easy or annoying encounters
>Has creatures we fight explode and do area damage to make up for easily dealt with enemies

What does ITT stand for?

>>54769213
Welcome to /tg/, newfriend. ITT is short for "In This Thread".

>>54737348
This is a red flag for me, this guy as a DM is someone who I would be unable to play with. I want to play to have fun not to talk like an elf for 4+ hours. Sorry but I don't give a shit about role play as in dressing up or talking as my character. I just want to play as the character who ISN'T me which is kinda the whole point of the game. If I want to be a bard then I should be allow to without requiring to sing in real life. Maybe the whole point of being a bard is because I am bad at talking/singing in real life? You don't expect the guy who have 18 Str to be able to punch a hole in the wall in real life do you? Then why the fuck do I need a high real life charisma score just to play the game?

Sorry but you need to be aware there are many kind of players and many kind of groups. As a player I wouldn't belong in your personal group but nevertheless you should be aware it is as much your fault as it is my. If you call such players red flags then be aware you are a red flag yourself.

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>>54736498
>Invests in high carrying capacity
>Buy a ton of rope and latches, basically shit to strap items on to me
>"No anon you can't carry the loot lol where would you hold it?"

>Wizard never has to label his fucking components
>Casters don't need to explain how they cast
>Barbarian doesn't explain rage
>Rogue doesn't explain why he knows everything's anatomy
>I have to explain how I carry literally everything

>>54769502
you sure knocked down that strawman

>>54753516
Translation: we were too lazy to assign prices to magic items, so the DM makes something up

>>54743916
You can't force someone to mourn, if you really cared enough to be sad about them passing then you'd care enough to try and help them with their depression.

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>>54768124
Oh shit sorry I forgot it's the CURRENT YEAR. Now I have to be accepting of all kinds of bullshit. Trannies in Magic, pro-fag content in D&D, the new edition of D&D being dumbed down for normies, Age of Sigmar, the fact that if you roll a natural 20 the dungeon master HAS to let it happen or else he's a shit DM, rule of cool is now hardwired into DM guides, "yes and" is now the rule of law in roleplaying games, and if you allow a character to purchase a magic item you're a thought criminal. All while D&D continues to pander to video game players and their cheeto-encrusted dollars, despite the fact that if the collective playerbases of DOTA 2, Skyrim, Dark Scrolls, World of Warcraft, and the viewerbase of Critical Roll, were all put in a gas chamber, the world would be a better place. But sorry, I forgot that it's the CURRENT YEAR and that means that if you kick a player out of your group for missing three game sessions out of five due to his (((depression))), then you are being problematic white male and need to be publicly censured.

>>54767892
It's not my fucking character doing the raping, I was the GM you idiot.
>>54767764
>So you've never had depression then.
No. No one has. (((Depression))) doesn't exist.

>>54769726
Nice blogpost, you fucking autist. Hope you will enjoy your permaban and fuck off back to R e ddit.

>>54767421
>Fun is literally why games exist.
Nope.
>If your players aren't having fun in a campaign, then you're a shit GM.
They do have fun. But "fun" is not the goal. Sorry you have such a shallow understanding of the world that everything has to boil down to "fun," you hedonistic serotonin slave.
>I was pretty much with you until you decided that "Who cares if my game is fun, games are for me to tell people a story because I can't otherwise write/for me to be edgy/to roll dice"
Nice projecting. I don't railroad and I don't "write stories" for my campaigns, so fuck off.

>>54767439
You don't have a mental illness. You're just a whiny bitch.
>>54767647
Glad someone agrees.
>>54767632
They're not, though. Only for cunts who watch Critical Roll and are playing the game to laugh hysterically at nat20s.

>>54767746
>Yep. I miss when DnD was about elves and wizards and so on. Not stupid shit like psionics, half-ghosts, and spellblades.
Agreed.

>>54764807
You replied.

>>54769439
>You don't expect the guy who have 18 Str to be able to punch a hole in the wall in real life do you? Then why the fuck do I need a high real life charisma score just to play the game?
Because the medium of roleplaying games is talking. Therefore to be good at them, you need to be good at roleplaying. Deal with it. Also no one is asking you to actually sing as a bard. Just to not constantly talk out of character and get off topic.

>Sorry but you need to be aware there are many kind of players and many kind of groups.
Sorry but you need to be aware that no one gives a fuck about how many "kinds" of players and groups there are out there, they are all shit when they go off topic and bring up off topic bullshit and constantly talk out of character for no good reason.

>>54768971

It's Badong. Killing is badong!

>>54769502
Yet it was never stated that he invested feats and points specifically to fucking carrying shit.

>>54769623
Translation: magic should not be mundane and thus currency shouldn't always be enough to trade yourself one.

But I agree, it's bad that the newest edition of DnD encourage actually questing and generally doing things. That shits cancer.

>>54769905
We must be the opposite of Badong.
Gnodab.

>>54769995
>entiretyofKungPowinonewebm.webm

If only I wasn't a phoneposter today.

>>54769642
>of course you help him, he's your son.
>you do everything in your power to help him, all day, everyday.
>you pay for a psychiatrist,
>you try to be the little light in his life, but as the days go on you see the spark in his is lower, to finally be exhausted.

>one day, you find his corpse hanging from the ceiling suspended from the roof

Now, anon, imagine that you are in her position. Imagine that your son that you've loved and cared for 20 years has killed himself. Imagine the feelings of guilt you would feel - thinking it's your fault. Imagine how the grief would taste in your mouth. Imagine the anger you would feel at those that at his burial would speak of how good he was, yet they never lifted a hand to help him.

Suicide is horrible. Suicide should never be committed. Why? Because it's an impulsive reaction to pain - immediate relief of whatever is bothering you.

But all of your ambitions, everything you have built, is destroyed. Nothing will last.

You might imagine that the only ones that commit suicide are friendless nobodies permavirgins straight from /r9k/, but I think you're mature enough to realize that it's not like that.

My neighbour once killed himself, I was never close to him but his suicide taught me a lot of things about life. A great guy, really nice and generally a great husband and dad. Didn't do alcohol, healthy social life, etc.

One day his wife finds his corpse in the cellar, his brains blown out on the walls. He'd been there for hours. Imagine how his family felt.

That's why suicide is selfish.

>>54769780
Oh, yeah, because he wouldn't be banned immediatly from plebbit because he berated (((diversity))). Yeah, forgot that reddit was more hardcore neckbeard than /pol/.

>>54769788
Explain to me then, why else would a game exist if not to enjoy yourself? What other purpose could they possibly serve?

>>54760142
Player sounds like a dick but I see where he's coming from. So many campaigns start at a low level and end at a medium level, that a lot of us have never even gotten to experience high-level play before.

>>54769811
>You're mentally ill because you want to fuck something weird
>You're not mentally ill because you want to die

Whatever helps you sleep, man.

>Games aren't for fun, they're for "insert obtuse reason on why the thing that was literally invented for fun isn't for fun."

Sure thing buddy. I'll just playing my horror game that doesn't need to be scary and my eating my candy that isn't about tasting good.

>>54737348
>>pointing out cliches/tropes in the campaign during actual play, out of character
Not really a problem. I actually kinda like when my players do it for cultural references. Helps them to know the feel of the game.

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>>54736498
"I know you said to only use the core books and two supplements but after reading through the Monster Manual I want to play as a INSERT RIDICULOUS RACE HERE. You can homebrew that for me right?"

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>>54742037

>>54770259
Wanting to fuck other men is unnatural and thus you are mentally ill. Wanting to die is just being a whiny pussy. Also can be completely rational in some situations. As for your whinging about games, you prove nothing. A horror movie that isn't that scary can still be good, and an RPG that is "fun" can still be a pile of horse shit. But of course you have never striven for quality in anything in your life so you probably wouldn't understand.

>>54769748
>No. No one has. (((Depression))) doesn't exist.
I'm from /pol/ even I think you're an edgy faggot who is clearly a grade-a sociopath edgelord or overcompensating the 'tough ultra-aryan' routine. You aren't fooling me you crypto-cuck.