Flavor Text

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"Of course you should fight fire with fire. You should fight everything with fire."
—Jaya Ballard, task mage

>>54649558
>having to put up with the Diet Jaya that is Chandra
>for over a fucking decade

Just fucking kill the franchise already.

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>>54649254

That's Jinxed Idol.

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>>54649760
Wasnt this one the one you wanted to post?

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lets stop with the Red, and lets go with some Riddles

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The humor flavor texts are pretty hit and miss.
The serious ones have more consistency in making me say "Aw, fuck man."

>>54649896
Nah that one is shit.

>>54650302
But hibs puppji!
Soo saab

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>>54649254

>>54650224
The answer MIGHT be a dick

>>54650333
I read that as "being-in-the-way-of-a-millenial-old-vampire"

>>54650334
It has to be genitles in general.
The first part is almost certainly phallic but the two questions after that are very reminiscent of vaginal behavior while the last part can relate to both genders.

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>>54650317
>>54650302
The dog is really important
protect the puppji!

>>54650410
>millenial-old-vampire
Oh gee i'm literally shaking right now. I mean.. Really shaking, how do you just cross my way like that? no, seriously, are you, like, retarded or something? That's not cool. Can't you see how that's not cool? i mean---
*the creature kills itself"

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its his dick?

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>>54650986
He's talking about his 4 arms, so he doesn't know what the 4th one is for.

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>>54649254

I love goblins.

especially ones with big ol titties

>>54650224
the winds

>>54652493
How does it bite?

>>54652493
That's what I'm thinking.
>>54652533
A cold, biting wind?

>>54652533
You've never heard of a biting wind? Must be from a warm place. It's a term for very cold wind, the kind that blows right through whatever warm clothes you have on. And chill to the bone.

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>>54652610
Not only warm, but also non-english speaking

>>54650224
Sheet music.

>>54652984
Don't start

>>54653004
I don't get it

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>>54652457

>>54653240
That's Ancient Grudge levels of bad.

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>>54653004
ok, ok, for realsies this time
I love old wishes' flavor text

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With the removal of damage on the stack rules, this flavor text is no longer accurate.

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Torment flavor text was a competition between Kamahl, Chainer and Terok in triatlon of edginess, saltiness and snark but this guy's flavor text was top notch.

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Odyssey of course was in the same vein of the torment, most flavor text solid with some gems

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This baller of course if my favorite mana dork ever.

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I miss dwarves. I miss barbarians.
That is all.

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This could apply to alot of posters here

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>>54653914
Do you mean
"I miss Zombies. I miss Minions"?

>>54649712
>Jaya Ballard

WHY ISN'T SHE A PLANESWALKER?

SHE IS SO FUCKING AWESOME

>>54650986

That is some brilliant flavor text right there.

>>54652457

I really hated this flavor text.

>>54654112

I love the idea that he is spiteful that you are using him like this, and so will help out your opponent in any way that he can.

>>54654670
She is.
Guess they didn't used her because she wasn't young enough, or some dumb shit like that.
Liliana is old, but she looks like she's 25.

>>54654734
Indeed, that's clever AND a relative way to make sure he's not overpowered.
Now when you ask what's the deal with a character abilities you get shit like "she's a speeder".

>>54650459
Well yea, the dog can hunt.

>>54652359
I haven't seen that card since my balls dropped.

>>54650333
ugh. worst flavor text.

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>>54650224

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>>54650224

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Imagine all the butterflies that die on each mtg encounter.

>>54658847
>THE LAND CONTINUES TO BURN

Fuck. It never gets old.

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Then Serra was like batman?

>>54658903
I genuinely cannot tell how this came into being as a card. Is that flavour text?

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Flavor Text have never be more important

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>no one has posted the greatest lore on a magic card yet

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Kamigawa block is top tier when it comes to flavor text.

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>>54659943
True.
It's been more than ten years and I'm still fucking mad. What a waste.

>>54649719

I like the original flavor text more.

>"Here."

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So apparently only the Pidgeon were inmortal and young forever in this town.

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>>54649254
I have a soft spot for this guy. Something about that flavor text is really evocative.

>>54649254

Negates flavour text is the best.

"The greatest archmages study for decades to master a single power. The ability to say no"

Or something like that.

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>>54659943
>>54660002
Kamigawa was such a gem in terms of flavor and story, a pity that it's so mechanically all over the place.

That said, they managed to get the essence of characters down with their cards pretty damn well.

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>>54664379
This one?

>>54664265
I hope this guy gets erratat as a dinosaur, for my planned dino edh Deck.

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It's not flavour text, but it is flavourful text.

>>54664419
Fuck no.
Those pieces of shit shouldn't exist to begin with. Dinosaurs are either beasts or lizards.
Especially when they are in Naya colors Jesus Christ.
It's like they're being retarded assholes on purpose.

>>54664387
>so mechanically all over the place.
Yeah, they tried a lot of things. But some of them were pretty interesting tho.
Ninjutsu is still a favorite of mine, shame it'll never get mlentioned again since the name is too japanese-focused.
Not Kamigawan, but I wish they'd bring back Provoke

>>54664527
They should have just made them Dinosaur Beasts. Easy fix, works fine, and has inbuilt support with older stuff like Tyrannax.

>>54664569
Provoke was great, and I think they could totally bring back ninjutusu if they changed the name to something a little more generic. Maybe with the return of core sets they might be experimenting around with it.

>>54664588
Exactly. But noooo. We HAVE to fuck shit up.
Naga could have been snakes too while we're at it, if they had to ABSOLUTELY introduce a new type.

>>54653240
The tenses are out of whack. It shifts from past to present mid-sentence. Shit like that makes my skin crawl.

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this happend to me once....
I ask the principal to leave early that day because the odor was horrible i couldnt even stand myself.

>>54659229
I feel like adding a "Brawk!" or other bird noise every time I say it.

>>54650986
This is subtle but good.

>>54656276
You got it yesterday?

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Objectively the best flavor text

>>54653004
Liliana, the necromancer from Dominaria, a plane, insisted on coming to Amonkhet, another plane, to confront one of the two remaining demons to which she is bound, whose name is Razaketh, the Foulblooded, named after his foul blood, which filled the Luxa, the river that runs through Naktamun, the city that Liliana insisted on coming to to confront one of the two remaining demons to whom she is bound.

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>>54665093
I ship Gerrard and Hanna.
I dont know really the story of this 2.
But Gerrard have 2 RR and Hanna 2 NN next to each others.

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An old favorite of mine.

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>>54665111
....
English is like a second language to me.... but Im not sure If I understand what the hell this mean...

>>54653486
League of Legends Orianna stole this word for word. or maybe it's just a reference to a vague card.

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I always liked this one, as much as it screams blue smugness.

>>54665191
Considering they've been stealing shit everywhere for years I wouldn't be that surprised.

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>>54665255

>>54665321
If there's anything Anon hates, it's bad flavour text - especially Ancient Grudge, the symbol of poor literary choices.

>>54654670
She is, but she (probably) died at some point and Chandra inherited her goggles.

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>>54665395

>>54665433
>implying Chandra running away post Bolas-Beatdown isn't going to end with her running into older Jaya Ballard, who teaches her how to *actually* pyromance.

>>54665433
In the novel for Planeshift, Jodah implied that Jaya had died offscreen at some point.

Then Wizards realized oh, shit, no, that was really stupid, so they retconned it (something about mumble mumble Time Spiral alternate history cough).

Now Jaya's status is officially unknown; she may still be out there somewhere.

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>>54665445
Wish the art didn't crop out the actual monster.

>>54665464
That would be cool. Imagine the subtle difference between Both of their burn spells. Maybe lightning bolt gets reprinted when Chandra finally sorts herself out.

>>54665321

People give a lot of shit to that flavor text, but if the thing didn't spell out what was happening, I would have no fucking idea that that weird angular metal thing was supposed to look like a collar.

>>54665645
It's on every fucking card that involves Avacyn in some way. People are seen praying to it everywhere and it's basically Innistrad's cross. I think it would have worked if they truncated the "symbol of her church" part. All you need to know is that werewolves hate it and that it's a prominent religious symbol. It being a "collar" doesn't matter desu.

>>54649986
I'm not familiar with the story of that war in the lore, can anyone explain to me what this means?

>>54665732
>It's on every fucking card that involves Avacyn in some way. People are seen praying to it everywhere and it's basically Innistrad's cross

That part's clear. The part that it's a collar is not in any way clear at all, because it doesn't look like one. Saying "werewolves hate collars" doesn't imply that in this particular picture the weird cross-like object being destroyed is a collar. And that's the whole point of the flavor text. Missing the whole point is kind of bad.

>>54654699
>>54665010
I don't get it. Is it for jackin'?

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>>54665841
Who knows.

Here's the best flavour in all of magic.

>>54658847
I watched that video too.

>>54665763
The little minion is reporting the last of Mirrodan's resistance had been wiped out by the Phyrexian invaders.

>>54665763
The good guys' overwhelming defeat

>>54665596
>Chandra tapping into other forms of elementalism
>sucking the heat out of one foe and flash-freezing him, then roasting another with the heat

I want it

>>54665790
If you have to explain how you're being witty, you aren't being witty. If they can't properly convey the joke without explaining it, they shouldn't try to make it. If a simple concept like "werewolves hate collars" can't line up nicely with the card, don't try to force it. This is entry level shit. There's no defending it.

>>54665111
checked

The necromancer planeswalker Liliana, a planewalker from Dominaria who is a necromancer from Domineria, which is a plane where she comes from, insisted on joining other planeswalkers who were going to Amonkhet, a plane where they were not from, to confront a demon Razaketh, the Foulblooded, which is a dark humanoid creature, which is named Razaketh, the Foulblooded because Razaketh, the Foulblooded has foul blood after which Razaketh the Foulblooded was named and which filled the Luxa River, the river that runs through Naktamun, the city in Amonkhet, the plane Liliana instisted on joining the other planeswalkers not from Amonkhet in going to, who is one of the two remaining demons to whom she, Liliana, the necromancer planeswalker from Dominaria, is bound.

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She is just to hot

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>>54666286
just get rid of her

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>>54668093
pls no

>>54665790
There's a card that spells it out, they didn't need to clarify in the flavor text. http://gatherer.wizards.com/Handlers/Image.ashx?multiverseid=262863&type=card

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>>54668230
Just if she get into more action with Sisay and Hanna, even if they are probably skeletons at this point...
But she use black magic, so that shouldnt be a problem.

>>54664527
>I'm an asshole and I hate fun

>>54660002
Makes me tear up to this day.

>>54665367
Why couldn't it have just stopped at the first line? It actually would have been a good, simple, flavorful text.

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>>54652457
So did Braids!

>>54653599
You know who wrote a good chunk of Odyssey block's flavor text?
Maro

>>54664527
>>54664588
Any card currently printed as a Lizard, Beast, or Lizard Beast that depicts a Dinosaur will inevitably be a Dinosaur Beast/Dinosaur Lizard/Dinosaur Lizard Beast. If the creature type is printed on the physical card and is still a currently supported type, they don't remove it.
They don't want people picking up a Beast for their Beast tribal deck and then finding out WHOOPS NOPE DOESN'T WORK ANYMORE despite it having the word 'beast' clearly on the typeline. Same reason they don't do functional errata unless it's necessary.
It's just going to be the new ones printed from Ixalan forward that are just dinosaurs.

>>54665153
Congratulations, they were canonically a couple.
And then Hanna died to Phyrexian plague.
>>54649760 depicts what her father did when he found out she was dead.

>>54671179
I'm aware. In an ideal world he would be doing that job.

>>54671304
well...
At least she probably had fun with that Null rod...
O wait.. it does nothing....
never mind...

>>54665863
My nigga.
I fucking love this card.

>>54669043
Are you retarded? How is spouting normie memes fun?
I've loved dinosaurs since I was a kid. Heck, i literally learned how to read with books of them.

Doesn't change a thing. This a shit marketting decision, dooming an once interesting tribe. Using the exact same colors as it. Either they could have printed them as dinosaur and beast, or just called them di,nosaurs and have them be beasts lizards.
There is nothing fun in this bullshit. Just a big, fat messy waste.

>>54673139
Why would you take a screenshot of that? And on a mobile? Kys

>>54673139
It's actually pretty goodin EDH

>>54659068
very flavorful reminder text

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Transform Flavor

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>>54677089