D&D

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Today we went on a side quest, nothing special get a quy causeing problems, our bard gets to him first and seduces him ( bard elf whore) and the fuck. Not nowing the elf is a dragqueen and pulls out an out size penis, rails the dude so hard break his legs and tears his asshole so wide he took to steps and shit everything he ate the last week.

>>54645758
>le nat 1 maymay

I've played like three sessions of D&D in my life, why this triggers me so much?

>>54646342
because its an artist from tumblr appropriating one of our stories and inserting their pro-diversity narrative.
And 'lol auto-fail on nat one lol' is a terrible device for people without imagination

>>54646612
>appropriating one of our stories
If you really think that "rolled a 1 to intimidate and accidentally seduced the orc" was invented on /tg/, I have some 4chan gold accounts to sell you.

>>54646342
>>54646612

What would you guys have happen on a nat 1 in the exact same situation? I get the feeling people that automatically hate on these things barely even sit at tables and just piss vinegar on boards like these.

>>54648467
Depends on the tone of the game, if it's pretty serious I don't allow crit fails or successes outside of combat/damage. Otherwise this is completely fine for a less serious more pure fun sort of game. btw not either of those two people.

>>54648467
Assuming he's a character with good charisma, he makes a good insult, but it's lost in translation due to the differences in language and culture, and the Orc just shrugs him off.

A Nat 1 Intimidate doesn't magically turn into Diplomacy.

>>54648467
>Natural 1
Here's the problem. A natural 1 isn't an automatic failure on skill tests in DnD. A natural 1 is just 1 off from a natural 2. Nothing is "supposed to happen" when you roll a 1. If your skill+stat+roll doesn't meet the target number, then it's just a failure. So rolling a failure, regardless of degree (since degrees of success don't exist in DnD, everything is a flat % of success or failure), is just a failure.

>>54645758
>actually taking a screenshot of your phone
>not even saving the image

How retarded can you be?

>>54648467
I'd ask the guy what the fuck he's even rolling for. He's not intimidating the orc or anything, he's literally just trying to weasel out of coming up with a good insult. Fuck, why am I even playing with this jackass anyway?

>>54648917
He's a half-hearted troll. Of course he's retarded.

>Legend of the 5 Rings campaign
>I'm a socially incompetent murder-hermit Crab Clan bushi from the Carpenter Wall

We happened to be nearby when the Empress was attacked by Kolat assassins. We moved to intervene and were intercepted by ninjas, who attacked with poisoned knives and swords which proved useless because they apparently didn't know what a Crab bushi in heavy armor was capable of.

>laughing_hida_man.jpg

One glorious massacre later, we cut our way through to the Empress just as the last of her personal bodyguards falls. Some scarred, Tainted ninja starts casting a maho spell and we all shit ourselves trying to figure out how to stop him. Our shugenja flubs a spell to drop a huge block of stone on him and gets showered with gravel instead, but thinks fast and throws a fistful of gravel into the guy's face just before he finishes the spell, causing him to inhale pebbles and stone dust and start coughing. I introduce the ninja to the business end of my tetsubo and we help the last few guards mop up the stragglers.

The Empress instructs us to kneel, and we do. I make sure to keep my mouth closed because I'm even more socially awkward than the average Crab. Then the Empress makes us a Minor Clan, right then and there.

"Roll Etiquette to respond politely and appropriately," says the GM, with a shit-eating grin.

Luckily the Empress thought it was incredibly funny when I quietly, sweatily stammered out, "th-thank majesty, your Empressness," and there were no other important people within hearing distance.

>>54645758
Fuck off, phoneposter.

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>>54645758
>Black female muslim transgender DM

>>54650225
One of my best players is a black transwoman Quaker.

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>>54650252

>>54650447
How is that drivel?

>>54651689
>necromancing this shit thread

What is wrong with you.