Field Kit Inspection: Praetorian Peaks pt2 Edition

>>54237095
I don't know if I can pull off anything... I'm good but far from the best.

Rolled 8 (1d100)

>>54237229
REC ROOM

>>54237289
>He would wrap his arms around her waist, and would smile.

Riasz I'm telling you right now. You'll look good in whatever it is my mother picked out for you. I promise!

Rolled 31 (1d100)

>>54237329
*now violently charging around the upper floors screaming rec room*
REC ROOM REC ROOM REC ROOM

File: Viet Cong soldier.jpg (110KB, 442x640px) Image search: [Google]

110KB, 442x640px

>>54237229
What's to be served?

Rolled 25 (1d100)

>>54237345
REC ROOM please?

>>54237345
>Eventually, the local Arbites would come. Their bolters loaded, and ready to fire.

>"Mutant! Put your hands in the air, or you will be eliminated!"

>>54237392
*Losing all hope and most of my sanity, I return to the manor completely devoid of happiness.*

Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>54237404
>I'd attempt to find the rec room for him

>>54237403
All right all right, hands are thoroughly up.

>>54237339
>A praetorian guard runs up to the captain
Sir! I'm sorry to interrupt but the garden may be dangerous, we recently caught and defeated a spawn might be more of them. I recommend you to leave the gardens

>>54237476
I could hunt it for you.

>>54237527
Sorry visitor, but it's already dead, you could help us find the others

>>54237545
I'd be happy to.

What kind of plantlife is in the gardens?

>>54237564
Dis a regular garden boy so no carnivarous plants, well unless you go greenhouse, just search the gardens labyrinth

>Wanders around aimlessly

>>54237583
Hm. I'll give it a look after dinner

>Wanders off
>>54237597
>bumps into the astropath

>The Sicarian Infiltrator would do a fucking backflip onto the roof of the estate
>He'd make his way to the window of the General's room
>Would anybody be in there?

File: tie.png (70KB, 847x521px) Image search: [Google]

70KB, 847x521px

>The tech priest wanders into the dining room and finds himself a chair, before looking at his watch and realizing he is early
...shit

>>54237602
>Drops a handful of less than wholesome trinkets
Watch it! You would assume people with eyes could look where they are going...
>Picks the trinkets, odds and ends from the ground

>>54237643
My apologies, bound one.

Excuse me, would you help me find the dining room?

File: You_Doodle_2017-07-09T18_02_34Z.jpg (492KB, 670x1024px) Image search: [Google]

492KB, 670x1024px

>>54237403
This is Sargent rogg rogga. I outrank you. Maybe.
*my hands are still up*

>>54237660
It's that way. Need me to show the way?

>>54237734
If it isn't too much trouble.

>>54237749
Very well.
>Leads the way, making "witty" remarks about any passers-by
>Unless you havs a malformed and horrid sense of humor, you would grow tired of it in the first five seconds

>>54237793
Humorous. This is a mirror of your role in space, is it not?

>Seeing as I did not get a reply, I will assume there is nobody in the General's room
>I'd enter he estate through the window
>I'd scan for life in the estate, picking up multiple life signatures
>I'd close the door, and Id lock it. I'd put a wardrobe in front of it
>I'd raid the entire room for the General's possessions, and any imperial plans he had

>>54237804
Close enough. I do prefer carving over talking, and often it shows.

>>54237833
You carve?

>>54237339
Fine... I'll trust you here. Lead the way Mr. Posh.

>I'd begin wiring up a giant cybernetica bomb in the generals quarters
>This bomb would be big, capable of doing a lot of damage to the estate
>I'd begin uploading the stolen imperial data to HQ

>>54237875
Wood, metal, bone... I do like bone the most.

>>54237924
Wait a second.

>>54237904
Did you hear that? Sounded like that buzzing language the tech-heads use.

Rolled 14 (1d100)

>the bomb would be completed, and the timer would tick for ten seconds
>The infiltrator would jump out of the window and into the back garden
>rolling for the power of the explosion

>>54237940
Eh, I don't hear anything.

>>54237877
>He would smile, before once more leading the way to the manor.

Trust me. You'll love it! And you'll see love meeting Mother!

>>54237832
>There would be no such things in his room.
>What moron keeps secrets plans in a room he shares with his wife?

>>54238007
Bear with me a second.

>he goes into a side door in the hallway

>rolling to determine where the sound is coming from

Rolled 48 (1d100)

>>54238017

>>54238011
Will my Mother enjoy meeting your Mother?

Rolled 13 (1d20)

>I'd shove the wardrobe aside and I'd open the door
>I'd charge Vu Chen to leave no witnesses

>>54238032
As long as she doesn't show up qearing next to nothing. And doesn't try anything stupid.

Then again. My mother is rather easy to get along with. Especially considering she's a noble.

Rolled 4 (1d20)

>>54238053
Fuck!

>he tries to parry with his bayonet while firing his longstubber into the ceiling

Rolled 3 (1d20)

>>54238080
>I'd attempt to chop his right arm off!

Rolled 9, 13 = 22 (2d20)

>>54238107
>he walks backwards at a brisk pace while firing at the cyborg

>>54238080
>Hearing the sound of gunfire. Matthias would quickly pull out his hotshot Laspistol, and sword.

>>54238032
Go and find my Mother! NOW!
>With that said, he would rush towards the main manor. Several dozen armed guards following after him.

Rolled 7, 19 = 26 (2d20)

>>54238127
>first roll to dodge the gun fire, second roll to attack him

Rolled 20 (1d20)

>>54238127
>>54238107
>Knowing the large manor better than anyone. Matthias would manage to get to the area they were fighting in, relatively quickly.
>Taking quick aim with his hotshot laspistol. He would fire a shot at the mechanical warrior.

Rolled 8 (1d100)

>>54238151
>now bleeding profusely from the torso, Vu Chen stumbles and drops his weapon

>he scrambles to escape the room and the murderous machine man

Rolled 11 (1d20)

>>54238185
This would knock my flachette blaster arm clean off, and I'd only have one arm left
>I'd charge wyvern, letting off a flurry of attacks to his laspistol arm which was extended

>>54238056
If you keep trying to piss Mother off she won't do anything... but piss her off and we'll have a problem... please don't piss her off

Rolled 8 (1d20)

>>54238206
>He would manage to avoid the worst of the blow. His arm taking a rather minor, and uninteresting cut.
>Now in melee range. He would swing his power sword against the mechanical warrior

Rolled 2 (1d20)

>>54238252
>I'd attack back, trying to strike the man in his torso

Rolled 9 (1d20)

>>54238268
>the Guerrilla draws his sidearm and takes a shot at the infiltrator

Rolled 9 (1d20)

>>54238291
>I'd attempt to spit hot motor oil at Vu Chen

Rolled 9 (1d20)

>>54238268
>His opponent missing an arm, make it a lot easier to gauge his next attack. And he is easily able to parry the blow away with his power sword, before attempting to counter him, with a thrust.

Rolled 14 (1d20)

>>54238311
>I'd thrust my transonic razor into the man's stomach!

Rolled 9 (1d20)

>>54238322
Sir Matthew take cover!
>A praetorian attacks Infiltrator with his hot-shot

Rolled 13 (1d20)

>>54238322
>Thankfully, his armour, and his Refractor field would manage to aboarb the worst of the blow. Causing the attack to do very little to him.
>As such, he would straighten out his leg work. And would give another swing towards the one armed warrior.

>>54238333
>>54238311
>>54238303
>>54238291
Truly we are blessed by Tzeentch.

Rolled 6 (1d20)

>>54238347
>I'd take the brunt of the attack by my extra armour I conveniently had on
>I'd attack back on the man's power-sword wielding wrist

>>54238381
>he fires again, still laying on the floor

Rolled 16 (1d20)

>>54238381
>A simple parry, and a kick to the stomach, is all it takes to block the block from touching him.
>While the foul warrior is still unbalanced from his previous attack. He would thrust his blade towards him, before giving a swift slash upwards

Rolled 6 (1d20)

>>54238381
Die you rust bucket!
>Shoots another volley

Rolled 15 (1d20)

>>54238404
>The Infiltrator would now be brought to his knees, nearly dead
>In a last ditch attempt he'd spit motor oil in the face of the man

Rolled 19 (1d20)

>>54238401

>>54238144
What the fuck...
>She's running through the various halls and corridors
How the fuck am I supposed to find her...

Rolled 5 - 1 (1d20 - 1)

>>54238413
>He would be forced back, as motor oil covers his face and uniform.
>Though blinded, he would attempt to finish the warrior off.-1 too hit.

Rolled 17 (1d100)

>>54238426
>This shot would smash my head off, sending boiling motor oil everywhere
>rolling for radius

>while wandering the grounds of the mansion looking for 'souvenirs', he hears the sounds of battle
Uh, shit. I g-guess I should check that out. Can't have our generous hosts being shot up in their own house.

>>54238437
>after jogging through the corridors (during which some candlesticks mysteriously disappeared) he rounds a corner just in time to get a splash of oil across his coat
Ya gotta be shitting me, I just cleaned tha- say, what the fuck is goin' on round here?

File: saber-fate-extra-game-mobile-wallpaper-1080x1920-8960-3667331868.jpg (588KB, 1080x1920px) Image search: [Google]

588KB, 1080x1920px

>>54238430
>Rias would find several guards taking away a woman that would appear to be in her mid-to-late. As the sounds of fighting are heard nearby.
>"Mi'lady! We must get you too safety, now!"
>The woman would seen extremely hesitant to go anywhere. Going so far as to tell her guards so.
>"Not while my son and his Fiancé are in here somewhere!"

>>54238437
>Matthais Refractor field, would stop any of the boiling oil from reaching him.

>At this point, well over a dozen guards have arrived.

Search the area! Find what that bastard was doing in here! NOW!

>"Yes Mi'lord!"

>>54238437
>some of the oil splashes on Vu Chen's leg
Ouch.

>>54238529
Sir, are you alright? First the Spawn and now this, this...anyways should I call the medicae?

>>54238586
I'm fine! Go and take care of Private Chen! Have the Cog-boy search through this mechanicus warrior for whatever information it contains.
>Having finally heard electronic ticking of the bomb, Matthais would enter into his parents room.

Crap!

>>54238637
by the by. Did the discord channel go.diwn for anyone else? Or just me?

Rolled 64 (1d100)

>the Bomb would go off as Matthias entered the room!
>rolling for how badly he gets affected!

>>54238637
Oh course sir!
>>54238548
Come now chap, you did good. Are you okay?

>>54238652
no

>>54238679
ok, no! That's actual bullshit right fucking there and you fucking know it! You started actual shit, when this wasn't supposed to be a fight based thread today, and no you're outright trying to kill not one, but three characters with a fucking bomb? Smooth.

>>54238727
Caaaaaalm. It was a 64, not a 97. You'd be wounded at best, nothing a medicae can't fix

>>54238727
I have to agree.

>>54238775
dude no. Wtf man. I'm serious right now. You literally started SHITZ when this wasn't supposed to be one of those threads. And now you're not only blasting matthais to hell, but blasting van kleez and Chen as well! Like wtf man.

>>54238801
Void it all you want if this damages your perfect story arch your trying to set up between your own characters. All I wanted was to make 40k grimdark, like it always was. If you have such a massive problem with that then I'll take my leave

>>54238502
Well that makes things easier...
>she rushes to her, her rifle humming lightly
Are you Lady Wyvern?!

>>54238851
I'm not saying that. And not everything has to be grimdark and fighting everything thread. Sometimes a thread where stupid silly shit is good. And this was supposed to be one of those times man. If I could get into discord right now, I'd be discussing this with you. But discord isn't letting that happen right now.

>>54238871
Maybe we should continue this some other time

>>54238871
I'm out

>>54238866
>The guards would raise their weapons at the strange woman approaching their mistress. But the woman would raise her hands to stop them. A warm smile, not unlike those that Matthais usually has, would be on her face.

By the descriptions I've heard, I can only assume you to be the one my son, Matthais, keeps writing home about.

Rias, wasn't it. Ara, ara. You do look rather beautiful. I'm not surprised he's become so taken with you.

A strange citizen nobody noticed tagging along starts babbling in low-gothic then shits himself to death in a corner. The stench is unbearable, and otherwise of no consequence to the current goings-on.

>>54238932
Yeah. He ran into the gunfire like an idiot. He sent me to make sure you're safe. I'm assuming it was more to keep me out of harms way as well...
>she smiles lightly
I wish we could have met under less... stressful circumstances but
>she sighs
Never a dull day in the guard

>>54238965
Ah shit, I left the door open. Strange people you get round here, eh?

>>54239021
INDEED I DOTH AGREETH ON MINE ONST SELF I DO I DO.

>>54239001
>She would flash Rias a gentle smile

Of course he would do such a thing-

>Wow... She's actually rather short now that you get a close look at her. And she looks like she can't be much older than her late twenties, early thirties.

-he's a guardsman through and through. Just like his father.

>Matthais would just manage to turn off the bomb, right as the clock hit 00:01. Forcing him to let out a long sigh of relief, as he falls to the floor.

>>54239061
I know. He says it runs in his family. Is there a safe place I should get you?

>>54239114
>The smaller woman would smile.

It'll be alright. The Emperor's tarot said so.

>She would nudge her head towards the stairs.

You should go find him. I'll have the guards make sure everything else is alright.

>>54239194
Are you sure? He told me to find you for a reason...
>she puts her rifle on her back
I'd hate to leave you...
>glances at the guards
well not alone but... uhh... you know what I mean...

Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>54239194
Why hello there lady wyvern, what a lovely evening we are having. Mind pouring me a glass of painkillers and intoxicants?
*charisma roll*

>The man would enter the estate unknowingly with his giant sombrero on, and his banjo slung over his back

>>54239108
>Once he had calmed down a bit. He would stand up, and make his way towards Vu Chen, helping him to his feet.

You did a damn good job there trooper. If it hadn't been for you, who knows what would have happened to me and my family.
>He would pat the injuried man in his shoulder.

Remind me to put you in, for a commendation after dinner, and after we get you taken care of.

>>54239284

>(Fucking wrong character name! Damn mylenand having to phone post!)
>>54239247
It'll be fine, my dear.

>She would smile, before waving her off, as she is lead out to the house.

You did as you were asked. He won't fault you in that.

>He'd take out his banjo and maracca, and using his psychic powers he'd begin playing this song
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q-Rqdgna3Yw

>>54239324
>she sighs
I'll make sure he's alright.
>she starts hurrying back to the direction he ran off in
I'm so going to kill him...

>>54239248
>The guards would level their hell.guns at the Abhuman's. But once more, lady wyvern would raise her hand, to keep them from shooting.

I'm sure you can find something over in the dining room. As for painkillers.... You'll have to wait for the medic to arrive.

>>54239362
>Cuts and brusies can be seen all over Matthias. Small drops of blood dripping from him. But his injuries would seem various serious compared to Vu Chen's.

>>54239407
Positively wonderfluous.
I will just go do that then.

>I'd enter the building, looking at everyone as I did so

>>54239424
>Rias quickly pushes upto him, her weapon raised
Matthias... Are you okay? What the fuck happened?

>>54238684
I think I need to go to the infirmary.

>>54239444
Why hello there my inexplicably cultural friend. How are the ruffians treating whoever you are?

>>54239444
Hey, do you p-people hear maracas? Oh, uh, hello there.
I really shouldn't have left that door open.

>>54239527
Ah, you'll be fine. I've seen worse, uh, horrendous abdominal trauma.

>>54239524
>He smiles, before patting her head with his hand.

An assassination attempt. Likely by one of my families rivals.

I'm fine, but I'm more worried about the true hero here.
>>54239527
>He motions to Vu Chen who is on his back.

He needs a medic. Bad...

>>54239444
The shit and entrails from the first intruder follows this man, consuming him raw into its mass before slinking back off out of the story where he belongs.

>>54239558
>>54239560
....

Que?

>>54239572
Excuse me?
Is that uncultured low gothic swine speak I hear from you?

>>54239611
Ehh, no comprende

>>54239572
Ah, shit, lemme just...
>he pulls a battered book titled 'Languages of the Imperium: A Handy Phrasebook' and leafs through it
Uh... ¿Quién coño eres?

>>54239626
Me llamo José Luis Juan Miguel Ángel José Francisco Jesús Antonio

>>54239561
How bad? Bad enough that if his organs don't appear in 10 seconds he'll die bad?
>wink wink nudge nudge

>>54239623
YOU ARE NOT IN SPACE MEXICO ANYMORE COMPRENDE?
By the emperor these scoundrels keep multiplying...

>>54239569
>an attendant in a pristine suit comes over and begins poking the shit with a broom
I say, away with you! Filthy creature.

>>54239652
Uh...
Que?

Rolled 25 (1d100)

>>54239663
...
*rool to amount of alcohol consumed*
I need a drink to forget this ever happened.

>>54239663
>his eyebrows furrow as he furiously flicks through the book
Emprah's teeth, where... ah, this looks about right.
¿Cuál es su negocio aquí?

>>54239651
Bad enough, that he'll bleed out in about twenty minutes...

>>54239717
Soy un psíquico poderoso que rivaliza con los gustos de Ahriman y Eldrad Ulthran del mundo artesanal Ulthwe. He venido a buscar venganza sobre los enemigos que han matado a mi familia. Estoy en la esperanza de lograr esto uniéndose a este regimiento de la Guardia Imperial.

>>54239744
>she grabs his hand and starts dragging the two of them to the nearest side room
I need you to tell me where the cameras are...

>>54239764
Alright, I think I got, uh, maybe half of that. Some kind of psyker, wants to join the guard... eh, other bits probably weren't important.
¿Ha sido sancionado por el Imperio?

>>54239841
>He would nod his head. Doing one better, as he drags the two to a nearby room.

We'll be fine in here... Now you need you hurry up and do this, Rias...

>>54239527
Relax Chen... You're gonna be alright...

>>54239849
Eso no importa. Lo que importa es que yo le ayudo a usted ya sus compañeros

>>54239880
Oh shush and stand outside the door. We don't have time for this
>she starts unbuttoning her shirt
Double time it!

>>54239892
No, no, uh, ninguna sanción significa que, uh...
>he makes shooting motions

>>54239971
Que?

>>54239984
Shit, um...
Sanción, uh, ¡muy importante! ¡La policía te disparará de lo contrario!

>>54239955
>Matthias' eyes would narrow at this sight..but he would raise his hands up.

Just.... Don't make regret asking you to save him... You're my wife after all...

>He would stand outside the door. Albeit he would keep it open slightly.

>>54240043
Para ti, soy un psíquico sancionado

>>54240047
HELLO IS ANYTHING IMPORTANT HAPPENING IN THIS EXACT MOMENT?
DONT MEAN TO INTRUDE

>>54239955
Ummm...

>>54240075
Wh- ya know what, bien, bien. Eso servirá.
>he puts his phrasebook away and shakes his head

>>54240047
Uh, captain? We've got a s-sanctioned psyker here, says he wants to join the regiment. Don't ask me where he came from.

>>54240096
I've been checking rooms, too see if there are anymore assassins.

I'd suggest you check another one down the hall. That's an order.

>>54240135
Oh dios mio...

>>54240135
>He would let out a sigh.

I'll have the Commissar look into it, when I see him.

Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>54240125
>I'd walk up to Vu chen, casting a healing abiluty to heal him of all his wounds
>Due to me being a very powerful psyker, +20 to my rolls

>>54240141
That was an order.
So what's behind the door you are nervously guarding.
Also if there are assassins I'm not going to wander into rooms with no weapon into an ambush.

>>54240047
>The door quickly shuts

>>54240125
Fuck you're awake... Just close your eyes and shut up.
>she puts a pillow over his face before pulling a wisp of shimmering pink energy from her chest
Don't make me regret this
>she gently pushes it into the wound, the dull pink light turn gold as it pours from his cuts and gashes, his internals knitting themselves together, It's also excruciatingly painful for them both

>>54240189
What the feth did you do?

>>54240197
>she slaps him and glares
I said shut the fuck up. You don't say a word of this to anyone EVER... I just saved your life so be grateful.
>she starts buttoning up her shirt again
Please don't say anything...

File: chris-hansen.jpg (26KB, 352x707px) Image search: [Google]

26KB, 352x707px

>>54240189
Come out here, and take a seat for me

Rolled 77 (1d100)

>>54240239
Is that Chris Hansen!?
*rushes in through to meet Chris*

File: scooby doo.jpg (9KB, 236x267px) Image search: [Google]

9KB, 236x267px

Why are we here, just to suffer?

>>54240239
>>54240275
>an attendant begins poking them with a broom
Shoo, shoo! Back to your reality!

File: chrissy.jpg (31KB, 850x850px) Image search: [Google]

31KB, 850x850px

>>54240272
So Rogg. It seems there is a mistake here. Were you fully aware that you in-fact were sending sexual messages to a 14 year old girl online?

>>54240308
Yes

File: chris-hansen-1200x0.jpg (55KB, 1200x800px) Image search: [Google]

55KB, 1200x800px

>>54240318
And you know the consequences to such actions?

>>54240336
>>54240308
>>54240239
you've got the wrong guy for this. You're supposed to be Chris ORKSON.

>>54240336
Yes, hovever I am a minority and therefore not responsible for my actions. Case closed

>>54240359
So why'd you do it Rogg? You do realise sexual pictures were exchanged during the texts. and is, under the law, child pornography.

>>54240388
Well I wanted to make it onto dateline. And any crime I commit is the fault of society.

Rolled 16, 7, 11, 8, 15, 14, 11, 2, 9, 9, 15, 13, 15, 18, 17, 8, 13, 18, 15, 7 = 241 (20d20)

>>54240410
>I'd smash you around the head with a confederate flag multiple times

Rolled 7, 8, 9, 20, 3, 17, 6, 15, 9, 2, 7, 3, 3, 9, 9, 14, 17, 20, 9, 12, 10, 19, 7, 13, 6 = 254 (25d20)

>>54240410
>I'd do it again, this time with help from the police

>>54240431
You would think that.
It's lucky for me that you don't exist and I'm just awkwardly sitting asking to myself in rias room.

Rolled 73, 53, 26, 39, 20, 53, 12, 17, 68, 10, 22, 1, 23, 54, 53, 53, 90, 62, 23, 18 = 770 (20d100)

>>54240452
>I'd pull your pants down, and I'g gang rape you
>rolling for the size of your asshole afterwards

>>54240483
Ahh, this reminds me of nam.
I was tripping balls then too.

>>54240512
Ahh, after all that business with the psyker I need some- wait, where did that powder the spawn gave me go? Ah shit.

>>54240573
You, snake person. Don't pass the vinegar.

>>54240573
> stealth field deactivates
Here have some more "stuff"
Can you tell me what happened a saw a skitari but it wasn't mine