Imperial Guard Regiment Creation

Rolled 6 (1d10)

>>54231342
I'll bite

>>54231380
What's that soldier? A PDF? Well, we can't all be proper Guardsmen I suppose.. but at least we get to live planetside instead of those damned troop transports.

Now, I need a d100 to find out what kind of sorry sacks of shit that the Commissariat has to work with.

>>54231410
>PDF
Great, another retuard guard regiment

Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>54231410
At least it's not a Penal Legion again.

>>54232192
You sorry excuses for humans should be ashamed at your slovenly state! Look how long it took you to find a d100!
Though I shouldn't be surprised, as this planet's PDF is apparently filled with Gangers!

Now, unless you lot want to roll on nature of recruitment, Instead of taking Punishment/Redemption/Recycling, perhaps we should find out what kind of planet we're supposed to be bloody guarding!

We'll need another percentile roll for this one, if you scum can manage that.

>>54232257
PLEASE DONT YELL AT ME SIR, I AM TRYING MY BEST

Rolled 25 (1d100)

>>54232310
WHY ISNT THIS WORKING ?

>>54232329
Likely because you're a simple and foul Hive Ganger!
Well I suppose it could have been worse, at least there's a chance for clean water and working toilets on this shitheap of an Imperial planet.

Right! Now which one of you can tell me what this planet is like once you actually get outside of this damned hive of scum and villainy?
>Another d100 roll

Rolled 82 (1d100)

>>54232437
Yes sir, we are in....

>>54232462
..A dead world. Well isn't that just bleeding wonderful! Cherry on top that is, though perhaps I should be thankful there's an atmosphere!
Planetary Defense Force of a Dead World, now there's a laugh!

Well.. fall in, let's see what kind of troops you make at least! Who knows, perhaps you're a mite more specialised than infantry!
>d100 again, wow these tables use a lot of them

Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>54232508

>>54232513
Seems like we are an Heavy Infantry Regiment....

Arent mist Heavy Infantry regiments elite regiments sir ? How did we manage to become one ?

>>54232513
Hmrph... Heavy Infantry is it? Perhaps you're NOT totally undeserving of the Emperor's holy grace after all! The Guard will make a regiment of you yet!

>>54232537
Buggered if I know! By all rights you should be meat for the slaughter but here I am seeing you in heavy throne-damned armor! Where'd you get it from? It's not mining gear or something is it?

We'll get to that later. Now I'm told you receive some specialised training?
...You there! Perhaps you can enlighten me.. What exactly can this band of criminals possibly be specialists of?!
>d10 this time

Rolled 4 (1d10)

>>54232578
Well we specialize in...

Rolled 4 (1d10)

>>54232578

>>54232578
How should i know how mining gear looks ? I never worked before, at least not honest
>>54232593
>>54232597
Even more important, how exactly do we manage to be lightning strike units if we wear heavy armor ?
Being in the guard is confusing.....

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>>54232597
>>54232593
What the fuck

>>54232618
The dice gods will it!

>>54232609
Maybe were shock and awe kind of unit

Rolled 9 (1d010)

>>54232636
Possible, but i doubt that we are competent enough for that, after all we are in the retuard guard.

Anyway, lets find out how loyal we are....

>>54232666
i guess it kinda fits, we are heavy troops trained to do the job of light infantry, of course we are Unorthodox

>>54232593
>>54232597
So it looks like you're most definitely a quick bunch of hive scum aren't you? Alright, suppose that'll do...

>>54232609
Jump jets? Vehicles? I'm just the damned census taker, you're the ones with boots on the ground! Work it out!

>>54232666
After my job are we?

...Yeah fair enough I just need this damned form filled in, if you're willing to help I'm not going to say n-
What the hell did you say? The Imperial Creed isn't good enough for you is it?! Now I see why you're just damned Gangers!

Let's get this over with so I can leave your horrible presence..
d100! Show the bleeding class what special wargear the regiment no doubt stole is!

>>54232609
>Even more important, how exactly do we manage to be lightning strike units if we wear heavy armor ?
i guess once you are inside a chimera it doesn't really matter how heavy your armour is.

Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>54232719
We didn't steal anything mister! Honest!

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>>54232666
>Unorthodox
>Satan trips

>>54232732
>>54232744
It isnt stealing if we kill them first, never forger that comrade, it is a trophy
>war trophies
>unorthodox
>satan trips
I have a feeling that the inquisition wont like us at all.......

>>54232732
Then what, pray tell, is THAT? You little shits have been looting the battlefields, haven't you?
Good on you! That's some initiative right there! Just clear what you find with the cog-boys and point the dangerous end at the enemy, that's the ticket!

Right.. what's next.. seems the Administratum, in their infinite wisdom, need to know what your basic Creed is!
You there, guardsman! Which one of these is closest? We're nearly done and then I can leave this dead rock in space to somewhere with proper soldiers!
>d100 once again

Rolled 98 (1d100)

>>54232787

>>54232812
...You what? I'm.. just going to put you down as "other", guardsman. And maybe have a shower afterwards.. fething gangers...

By the Warp and every damned nasty that lives in it, how have you survived?! Who is covering for your borderline heresy? There must be someone!
>roll for regimental ally, d100

Rolled 38 (1d100)

>>54232837
Well, from time to time the higher ups get visited by ....

>>54232837
The- the what? The Mechanicus? Well I suppose that may explain a lot.. heavy armor, your... 'trophies'..
Though that means whatever comments I leave on this survey won't matter a damn when you're vouched for by the red robes..

That'll about do it, at least. Just need to hand this slate over to the quill pushers for them to.. I don't know, eat the thing. Update records, probably.
Before I go, at least.. what kind of trouble do you see around here? Xeno? Orks?
>d100 for regimental foe now, see what you've been taking trophies from!

Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>54232905
We have taken them from our evil enemies, we hate them, they hate us and we killed them !!!!
if only i could remember their name....

>>54232933
>tfw too intelligent as a ganger to remember your enemy.

>>54232940
What can i say, all these narcotics left their mark in my brain......

Not in a heretical way though, i always praid to Big E before snorting Cocaine of a hookers asscrack.....

Anyway, what was i saying ?
Oh yeah, right fuck those emperors children, they aint children of MY EMPEROR !!!

>>54232933
>Chaos aligned group
Hmmph, I know a lie when I see one, but if you don't or can't say.. well I have better things to do than force it out.
Carry on soldiers, and pray that the next inspector is as lenient as I was, plenty would condemn you as corrupted to the core!

>PDF made up of Gangers, criminals and dregs of society
>Hive on a Dead World, though it still has atmosphere it's still pretty shit outside the walls
>Heavy infantry specialising in lightning strikes
>They have an unorthodox following to the Emperor
>The regiment takes war trophies and have an... unusual philosophy
>They're, for some reason, pals with the AdMech and fight against a Chaos force

>>54233011
Thats the 112. circadian planetary defence force for ya, we kick their asses before they kick ours !

Rolled 9 (1d10)

Come on come on come on!

>>54233100
what were you even rolling for ?

>>54233011

Neato, are we talking a Chaos militia or Chaos Marines?