>The Pizza arrives but the game's been cancelled

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>The game resumes but the pizza got eaten

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>the game is on the pizza arrives but you're trying to eat healthy so you drink a smoothie while everyone else eats the pizza

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>The Pizza is canceled because the game got eaten

>Literally why my group has a BYOF policy

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> The pizza arrives but the game's been going a while and everyone's too drunk to reliably handle money

>The pizza arrives but the game's been cancelled
>Get the pizza guy to stay and play games to fill the table

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>the game gets cancelled for good because everyone left
>also there's no pizza

>>53682019

> The pizza arrives but someone short changed you and won't admit it

>everyone pitches in for pizza
>you have to cover the tip for 6 pizzas on top of your share

>>53682286

We make the GM host and pay for food and drinks. Sometimes I don't even play, I just show up for the free food and mess around on my phone.

>The Pizza Arrives. The game can finally begin.
>The Pizza is the nickname you gave to your Acne Laden Player.
>The Pizza is MVP and total Bro. Really cool guy.

>>53682342
i wish i could hate you to death

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>>53682342

>>53682362

I wish I could bait you to death

>>53682327

Do you not say, "It's $58," before the divvy if what you're handing the driver is $58? Certainly you're not paying tax and delivery fee separately.

>>53682342
NO. NO. BAD ANON. NO. GO TO THE CORNER.

>>53682342
I'm not even angry. If your GM hasn't swatted the phone of your hands and punched you in the face already, he deserves it.

>>53682395

She doesn't have a lot of friends so RPG night is really her only social activity

>>53682390
I've been jewed like that before when people get sandwiches and shit.

>>53682468

>jewed

Could you not? This isn't /pol/, throwing out casual hatespeech here isn't cool.

>>53682529
Incidentally, the player that does it is jewish. It's appropriate.

>>53682423
Oh, fuck you with a rusty fork.

>>53682579

I've been thinking about pretending to be in love with her and then dumping her on her birthday.

Talk me out of it.

>>53682637
The pussy might be too good, are you willing to risk that?

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>>53682019
>The pizza guy crashed into the players' car

>>53682654

I mean if it's good I can always just keep it going until I get bored.

>>53682637
That's bold talk for a master baiter.

>>53682637
I will be forced to make /tg/ even worse than it is now. You think it's bad right now? I can get 12 threads off an hour between two IP Addresses. Worse, I know exactly how to make an unbannable shitpost... 3.5, Numenera, Cypher system, Pathfinder, and degenerate threads. And that's just the lazy ones. You haven't even seen the original bait threads I have stored away. Each causing the right amount of anger and discussion to propel them to a full bump limit.

In short, Wayne will actually start ruining the board.

>>53682704
That and if she's really as desperate for company and affection as you say, who knows what fucked up and devious and degenerate things she'd do to keep you locked inside her. She'd get you to spill your spaghetti while you're balls-deep in her claptrap and before you know it she's wearing a cow-print bikini and begging you to milk her while you've got a plug up your ass or something wild.

Best to just leave it be.

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>You try to cancel but the games been pizza'd

>>53682745

You know, you might be right. There is a guy in the group she obviously has a crush on, I'll just try and fuck him instead.

>>53682744

I don't care what everyone else thinks about you Wayne, I think you're alright.

>>53682767

Fuck him, fuck her, get him to fuck her, cuck him, cuck her, then make them both your fuckslaves. Slaanesh demands it.

>>53682529
Holy shit gb2leddit and kill yourself when you get there, you massive, weeping vagina.

>>53682744
Wayne, the hero we don't deserve

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>>53682390
>paying taxes

>>53682744
wtf I love Wayne now

>>53682529
I know right! 4chan is a politically correct place. Everyone should check their privilege

>>53682668
Why is that so believable?

>>53682185
Pay by card by phone when you order.

>>53682744
>chronic name user threatens to ruin the board
already there fampai

>>53682147
>no one shows up because they stressed out about buying pizza so the game got canceled

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>>53682392
Best post.

>>53683444
I do it because it's the most hilarious joke ever. You know what anyone who's annoyed at me for namefagging does? They reward the behavior by making a big deal out of it. They insult me, they tell me to stop, they make it their problem.

Better yet, namefagging for me is an act of laziness. It takes effort to delete my name, but requires nothing of me to leave it. I am literally doing nothing and it annoys people.

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>>53682062
OP here, this happened.,,

...and then the gm had to cancel again due to an unexpected IRL occurrence.

>>53682342
Thats no good anon, I hope in time you can see where you've gone wrong.
>>53682423
You may be across the point of no return anon.
>>53682637
Oh, you've been baiting people. Good to know you're not as shitty as you were pretending.

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>>53682529

>>53682019
Anon, the game ended months ago. If you want to eat a groups worth of pizza every week just admit it

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>The pizza is running the game now

>>53682019
>The Game arrives, but it's been on the pizza and the rulebooks are all soggy with grease.

>>53682019
>>53682062
When are we getting a Fire Emblem tabletop roleplaying game?

>the pizza arrives but there is no good pizza delivery in the whole capital, especially not with student meal coupons

I want back to my small town with 2 good pizza deliveries and a godly Italian restaurant.
1 internet to the anon who can tell where I live.

>>53685293
What can I buy with 1 internet?

>>53685936
Half a plot device.

>>53682637
Can I be your shitposting apprentice? This is masterful tradecraft.

>>53682529
Calm down tumblr, you'll spill your mayonaise gender.

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>dinner is cooked but players skip out on the session

>>53686581
It's better than average, but I doubt he could pull it off more than once. It's straight shock value with a good solid punchline, but it lacks longevity. Repeated it would become little more than a Virtpost imitation.

>>53682342
I am trying to set you on fire with my mind.

>>53686443
Shit is that the exchange rate on it these days? In that case I up my offer to 2.

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>>53682342

>>53685292
I've been mulling over homebrewing one ever since Awakening and it came back to mind with Echoes, but it'd probably just be a bunch of aspie numbercrunching and bad balance.

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>>53685292
Just use d100. Every major FE combat mechanic is based on d100. The formula for combat is a lot simpler than you think. There's this system which is far from perfect but I've adapted it considerably and hopefully will have a test game with friends this month.
http://fed20.wikidot.com/start

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>>53685292
>>53687038
I found this homebrew a few years ago. We had a fun campaign before it died due to school and summer. The balance is all over the place though, and random leveling can leave you with bad or amazing stat arrays.

>when all your other stats are higher than your hp as a mage

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>>53687307
Holy hell, it actually got updated. I thought it was dead.

>>53685292
Better question, when do we get
>Pizza Delivery, the RPG
?

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>>53687322
Here is the other book for that system.

>>53686948
Gee Bill, how come your mom lets you have two Internets?

>>53687378
I'm sure you can find a Snow Crash setting with Pizza Delivery fluff.

>>53682745
Why are you trying to give me a boner at work nigga ?

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>>53682744

>>53687378
Build a system around the idea of over-the-top bullshit hampering goofy anime-ish pizza deliverymen with an emphasis on the system moving as fast as possible. Every delivery must be made within 20 minutes. Real-time.

>>53687378
Sounds like the Fururama RPG, but it's now Planet Express Pizzeria.

https://1d4chan.org/wiki/Futurama:_Now_With_Dice

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>>53682529
No

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>>53682342

>>53682123
Enjoy your disgusting runny shits

>>53685292
I'm not sure how you would do it. Weapon degradation seems like pointless book-keeping, random leveling is just videogamey bullshit.

As >>53687307 says a d100 hack. Alternatively, hack 5e somehow, make some grid maps, give players advantage for weapon type shenanigans,

>>53685292
4e

>>53687378
>>53687989

Google Ninjaburger the RPG and be amazed. Refluff it to Pizza and be even more amazed.

>>53690616
>>53687378
>>53687989

Refluff it into Pirate Pizza specifically. Crucially important.