Confession time

>>53110395
I've never actually played a proper tabletop in my life.
Ran online games for randoms? Sure, why not. Done worldbuilding? Yeah, I did. Designed homebrews? That too.
But actually sitting down and playing a game with 3 or 4 people? Never in my life.
The only reason I post on /tg/ is because it's the only more or less civil board on 4chan that encourages creativity.

>>53110395
Also....

>I don't like druids unless the player plays them as a true nature lover, and will punish that pc in 1000 little ways, or reward the pc in 1000 little ways, depending on the players style.

>>53110447
>I've never actually played a proper tabletop in my life.

Shit man.

Is that by choice? or because of conditions?

>>53110395
I like challenging my players. I like being challenged as a player.

>play warhammer
>hard encounter, two players take crits (one player was suicidal so he dies: he wanted to play a new character so he was burning through his fate points. The other just got hit hard.)
>another player sends me a message "wow encounter balancing!"
>I'm actually enjoying this

>I don't think I have the balls to kill any of my players if I can help it. Fortunately my players are quite new and haven't caught on yet, in fact they think I'm actively trying to kill them
>>53110395
what RAW rule OP?

>>53110459
i play my druid as someone who worships the hunt, and believes natural order means "the strong prey upon the weak"

would you prefer a tree hugger over that?

>>53110471
A mixture of coincidences and bad life choices. I've spent the last 6 years faking madness, so I can't really socialize a lot.

>>53110395

I enjoy tormenting my players. I set up huge, elaborate romantic subplots for them, then I put them through the emotional wringer. I do this because, to be frank, character drama is the most interesting part of games, to me.

I'm also massively right-wing. Whenever I can, I slip red pill truths into my games. Nothing overtly racist, just things like girls in traditional roles and multiculturalism being inherently self-destructive.

>>53110395
>say it now, get it out in the open, and off of your chest.
I think 3D20 tale the middle, and also the advatange and disadvantage on top of that. Is the best dice system to date.

Prove me wrong, I think its even better than 3d6

>>53110599
That sounds overcomplicated.

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>>53110617
Not that anon, but 3d20 take middle is pretty simple. And I do agree with that anon.

>>53110506
>what RAW rule OP?

A "minor" thing really.......it's about rolling init. We started with 2e, where init was rolled every round....when we started 3.5, we kept doing it.

>>53110532
>would you prefer a tree hugger over that?

I want a player to justify WHY a nature lover, who's dedicated his life to nature, would constantly be in town, sleeping in Inns, exploring dungeons, and solving a murder mystery at the nobles castle.

>>53110645
How about the A/D, then?

>>53110647
>I want a player to justify WHY a nature lover, who's dedicated his life to nature, would constantly be in town, sleeping in Inns, exploring dungeons, and solving a murder mystery at the nobles castle.

that's fair enough, and something ive struggled with to justify in character

>>53110395
I pretty much killed my own campaign and let my players, who are all my friends, down because I was depressed and struggling to keep up with just 3 college classes this last semester.

>>53110647
The last Druid I played was basically just the local village wise man. Lived out in a hut tending to beehives and helping people with their crops or health issues before adventuring. Was pretty much fine wandering around cities though, and just considered them as hives that were all part of the balance of nature.

I miss Swarm Druid

I stroke my dick under the table during sessions.

>>53110395
I hate what my horror campaign has ended up as with every single PC no selling gore and inhuman monsters that shouldn't exist. Now I'm just trying to get them killed and have myself liberated from this nightmare.

Forgive me /tg/ for u have sinned

> I use in character loss to torment my players and I enjoy it. To the point of having the low int dwarf hearing her mother wispering to her and accusing her of failing to protect her after the player critical failed a listen check.

>I don't really plan, I just make most of the game up as I go along. Thusfar it has worked out.

>I am a killer dm. Even if I do not admit it too my players.

>I use natural 1's to dick with my players. Even to the point of killing them.

>I have purposely made characters to break games and done so whilst in character.

>there is a reason players do not pick mushrooms in my games. It harkens back to a near tpk.

So, am I forgiven /tg/?

>>53110822
Fuck that sounds like literally the druid I was going to play. He was good at carpentry and first aid.

Boardgames are shit and I don't know why people like them.

I'm only in my current game for the combat. I don't give a shit about the GM's story because it's not very good and is going nowhere interesting.

I also regularly zone out and look at smut in another tab while plot happens.

>>53110447
>never actually played a proper tabletop in my life
>Ran online games for randoms
that's a lil contradiction i see here

>>53110821
Mental health comes first anon. I've been through similar, don't let it eat you, you had to do what you had to do.

I'm rooting for you.

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>>53110395
>Rob/riot/kill for no good reason

>Not realizing that everything has a reason and nobody goes out and smashes shit for no reason unless they're just a 1-dimensional caricature of something you're afraid of understanding.

You can make something have a reason without that reason being correct or even morally relatable, anon. You're /pol/-ing up this nice, happy board.

>>53111320
well the difference seems significant to him so, eh

>>53111459
>You're /pol/-ing up this nice, happy board.
He did warn you

>>53110821
>>53111402
Nah fuck that, push yourself, keep going, it's a slippery slope mate you can't give up.

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>>53110567
>/pol/ttrpgs.
That sounds awful.

>>53111459
People can have reasons anon. Most thugs however have shit reasons.

>>53112361
Literally everything has "reasons" for bad acts.

Dahmer raped and killed because he had reasons.

That's a pointless argument.

>>53111459
>Orcs Rob and kill..
> Zomg!!! GTFO pol!!
Wat?

>>53110599
>Prove me wrong
d% exists. Takes away all that obfuscation bullshit.

>>53112603
He specifically said he has them act like 'Detroit urban dwellers'.
Y'know black people?

>>53112671
Only blacks live in Detroit?

Fucking racist...GTFO to /pol/

>>53110395
I make it rough as hell to multiclass.

Want a level of rogue? Find the thieves guild and convince them to teach you the tricks of the class. Want a level of cleric? Find a god that wants you and talk him into accepting you. Want a lv of fighter? Pay a master to train you.

It costs money, time and effort.

> Why?
> Because I hate multiclassing

I honestly can't play evil characters. I find then one-note at best, edge lords at worst, and the last time I got convinced to do am evil campaign, my character was lawful neutral and disgusted by everything going on.

I also have a bad case of human supremacy. In my cod game i'm in, out annoys the shit out of me that a vampire with celerity will always beat a mortal in melee, even if the mortal was like fucking Bruce Lee.

>>53110821
Are...are you me?

>>53112907
Why do you hate multiclassing?

>>53113394
Pick a lane. Stay in it.
Don't try to be everything.

>>53113477
Clever players use their abilities and think past problems. They know they have limitations and strive to work around them.

Multiclass players aren't smart enough to do that. They have to take class levels of other classes, to make up for their lacking.

>>53113254
>I also have a bad case of human supremacy. In my cod game i'm in, out annoys the shit out of me that a vampire with celerity will always beat a mortal in melee, even if the mortal was like fucking Bruce Lee.

Same here anon.

There's nothing wrong with that

>>53110567
>a /pol/ fag can't help but insert his ideology into everything

What a surprise

>>53114347
>DM inserts his ideology into his campaign
>imply that his creations will see the world the way he does

Why, that's unheard of !!! he must be from pol!

>>53110647
>I want a player to justify WHY a nature lover, who's dedicated his life to nature, would constantly be in town, sleeping in Inns, exploring dungeons, and solving a murder mystery at the nobles castle.
Sentient races are nature too, they live, breed, and die just like everything else. As such, they have just as much right to exist and be protected. Most importantly, the character themself is also nature, and their self-preservation is perfectly allowable in any situation where their life is in jeopardy.

At least, that's how I play my ranger, along with being quick to acquire cabin fever due to being "stuck" in a town or inn as opposed to /trv/ling /out/doors

>>53114720
>Sentient races are nature too, they live, breed, and die just like everything else. As such, they have just as much right to exist and be protected. Most importantly, the character themself is also nature, and their self-preservation is perfectly allowable in any situation where their life is in jeopardy.

That's a total crock of horse shit, and a poor attempt to justify someone playing a druid like a retard.

"Urban Druid", is an oxymoron.

I'd strip a druid of his powers, his animal pet would leave, his spells would fizzle, if they attempted that shit.

>>53110395

My big brother taught me RPGs and was a complete dudebro. We used to have so much fun, random friends and family playing with us. Then I tried to go into the 'gaming community' and, well...

Most tabletop gamers sicken me. Seriously. The smell, the mental weakness/illness, the social ineptitude, the autistic repetition of injokes. I participate in forums and /tg/ to get my fix and allow me to be physically away from you all. I am moderately well off, decent looking, and have a social life, which makes me anathema to 99% of tabletop gamers. After dealing with a couple of sad powertripping DMs and then the sad sacks trying to hit on any female I was around when we were gaming I just stopped participating in the physical gaming community.

Though for the last 6 months I have belonged to a society of actually well-balanced professionals who game, and it's fun as fuck.

>>53114786

>"Urban Druid", is an oxymoron.

There is life in a city. Rats, packs of feral dogs, pigeons, birds of prey, cats, bugs. City parks, sewers, graveyard ecologies. Grass and weeds, trees from farflung climes. Man has turned his hand to make cities in their image, but it's just a saddle on the earth.

I've seen some well-done urban druids.

>>53114786
Cities are an ecosystem Anon, have you never heard of urban animals? Urban foxes? Urban dogs? Urban cats? Urban crows? ...No?

And the most invasive species, humans?

>>53110395
I start games, but almost never finish them. Mostly because i get frustrated because the players start minmaxing and just trivializing things but also because I start to hate anything I build. It's never good enough, so why the fuck do I keep coming back for more?

>>53114786

>I'd strip a druid of his powers
Butthurt supreme.
>his animal pet would leave,
and be replaced by a dogbro to chill with while handling urban ecology
his spells would fizzle, if they attempted that shit.
More butthurt. Give 5 druid spells that don't have an urban application. I'll wait.

>>53114961
At worst, the druid gets homesick. One of mine is a 7ft tall stag-like sort of faun, he gets irrationally irritable and moody when he's been around a crowd of people too long, not helped by how they stare, gawk and point, or try to touch his antlers for luck and fertility.

He may or may not still have some remnants of puberty in his hormonal setup.

>>53110395
I never thought we'd actually get the questfags kicked off /tg/. I was just trolling for giggles because questfags were so easy to get butthurt.

>>53110447
Goddamnit, I came here to post this.

Actually I guess it's only partially true as I have a lot of hours clocked in for Blood Bowl 2, but BB2 isn't a 1:1 copy of the tabletop's rules.

>>53115367
>Give 5 druid spells that don't have an urban application. I'll wait

You miss the point.
Druids revere nature. If you revere nature, you're not spending all your time in the city, doing city stuff. You're out in NATURE, doing nature stuff.

I don't give a fuck if a spell can be used in (x) location or not, that has not bearing on reverence for nature.

Also:
>Durr.......imma walk around town with my wolf! cause ir druid!!!

If any of my players tried that retardness, they'd get booted. No fucking city wants a fucking wolf roaming the streets.

>>53115397
>7ft tall stag-like sort of faun,
>>53115397
>irritable and moody
>>53115397
>touch his antlers
>>53115397
>fertility
>>53115397
>puberty


Yiff in hell furfaggot.

>>53114961
>There is life in a city

So? Rats and housecats don't make "nature".

The crazy cat lady, isn't a fucking druid. She's a cat lady.

I have grass in my yard. That doesn't make my yard "nature". Its a fucking yard.

Damn /tg/ is fucking retarded some days.

If you want an urban guy, make one. Don't try to twist the nature class into some freaky position just for cool spells and a pet. Faggots.

>>53115662
your definition of "nature" is completely arbitrary

t. bio engineering student

>>53115367
>urban ecology

>I have a house plant in my apartment.
>that's revering nature! i r druid!

Yeah, no.

>>53115690
So are the RAW.

So in that case, we defer to whom? The DM? Oh, that's me.

Well, my definition of "nature", isn't the city streets.

>>53115576

>wolf
>dog
>cannot answer the question

Oh, poor retarded fa/tg/uy.

>>53114786
>"Urban Druid", is an oxymoron.
That's just what marketers call the black druids

>>53115690
>Where is the Vulgar Unicorn Inn?
>I know, I'll make a NATURE CHECK
>Said no one ever
>Why not? because cities aren't "nature"

>>53115714

>waaaaah, i dont like a class archetype waaaaaah

God damn neckbeards.

>>53115690

If you have 5 or more ranks in Knowledge (nature), you get a +2 bonus on Survival checks made in aboveground natural environments (aquatic, desert, forest, hill, marsh, mountains, or plains).
Why didn't they include "cities" in that list of NATURAL environments?

>>53115754

>not keeping (nature) add (streetwise) to class list and/or allowing Druid to make (nature) checks in his home city

Tada. A nearly meaningless check that gives no true mechanical advantage in 99% of adventurers but allows this fix.

>>53115737
>>wolf
>>dog
>They're exactly the same!

t. ceasar the dog whisperer

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>>53114786
>"Urban Druid", is an oxymoron.

>>53115754
obviously that would be knowledge(local) instead
but id be fine with a druid making a knowledge(nature) check to figure out what's causing the rat infestation in a city

>>53115788
IC

We just have to twist shit around, and change it up, and then it fits what we want to twist it to!

Ok.

>>53115804

>post you quoted specifically says swapping out to dogbro

Dyslexic and autistic.

>>53115832
>specifically
You don't know what that word means anon?

>>53115826

>hey, I want to have a meaningless skill check available
>nooooooo youre ruining my gaaaaaame maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamaaaaaaaaaaa!

So, how many tendies do you charge per session, glorious DM.

>>53115847

Dyslexic, autistic, and just straight uneducated. Triple threat bro.

This is coming back to a thread I saw a few times on /tg/.

Where players were crying like little cunts, that a DM put a couple ladders in the game. And the druid had a animal companion horse. Thus the druid was disadvantages because his horse couldn't climb ladders.

Why are druidfaggots such bitches?

I'll play mini games with strangers, but to play in RPGS with my group you have to be vetted first by somebody in the preexisting group.

I will cheat if somebody else cheats, and I will do it blatantly, daring them to call me out on my shit.

>>53115916

>has vetting
>still has cheaters

Need to go to extreme vetting.

>>53115882
>druid that cant deal with ladders
i hope this was a new player

>>53110555
>faking madness
Elaborate

>>53115937
There were dozens of posters saying that the DM should adjust his setting and game, to remove ladders, because it disadvantaged the druid, by denying the druid his companion.

It was pretty fucking autistic. The "reeeeees" were off the charts. Over a ladder.

>>53115779
Um...I've got no answer for that.

>>53110395
>I hate one of our players, he constantly tells me how bored he is during serious moments in the campaign. Unless he is the center of attention 24/7 he's bored.

I'd kick him but I think the other player like him.

>>53115603
Piece two and two together, anon. Humans attribute holy powers of fertility to nature and its godly representations, whether or not anything of the kind actually exists. Stags also have a reputation, and there's no need to be insecure about it like that.

The guy is also a born druidic entity that makes seeds grow into mighty trees and grass sprout in the most unwelcoming soils.

Yes, the women believe that they will be more fecund if they get to touch the "forest-god" 's horns or ask for his benediction (a similar thing existed in chinese culture with getting a boy for touching the emperor's seat), and because he tries to be patient he doesn't scorn people off but at some point that gets to him like it'd get to you. It's just roleplay.

>>53115662
>Rats and housecats don't make "nature".
They... Kinda do.

"nature
'ne?t??/Submit
noun
1.
the phenomena of the physical world collectively, including plants, animals, the landscape, and other features and products of the earth, as opposed to humans or human creations."

Don't go and say that just because cities are human creations, there still cannot be nature IN the cities.

>>53115779

Who makes survival checks in a city? You Bear Grylls'ing it through Manhattan? Shoving a thumb up a cabby's cloaca to sex it?

>>53116002
>human creations
Natural environments make up nature anon.

A rusted truck sitting in a field isn't "nature", even though it may have a snake living in it.

>>53116027
>Who makes survival checks in a city
No one usually. Because they're for natural environments.

>>53116027
>Shoving a thumb up a cabby's cloaca to sex it?
I mean......will the cabby file charges? Because that could be a deal breaker.

>>53115933
Eh, the cheating is mostly in the mini shit. Crap like fast scooping dice, mismarking damage, etc... People get horribly shitty when playing tourney shit.

RPGs tend to be cleaner because of the vetting process.

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>>53110555
Juicy

>>53116027
>Shoving a thumb up a cabby's cloaca to sex it


>Be me, Druid
>Roaming the city streets (as druids tend to do)
>See a cabbie
>It's flowing turban makes identifying it's sex impossible
>I sneak up and dive through it's open window
>Jam my thumb up it's cloaca
>From the screams, it seems this one is a male
>Run away and document my findings
>DRUIDS, FUCK YEAH

>>53110395
>A forever GM here. Once ran a game for six months while suffering burn out.
>Did not take notes on anything, did not prepare anything (winged the whole game).
>Failed to even check the MM and just randomly awarded exp.
>In short I did not put in any effort, and it killed that group. All players left.

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>>53110395
>running a game
>one player is my best friend, another is a girl that I'm in love with
>they only met because of the game I started
>their characters and an important NPC have a love triangle going
>best friend and the girl grew closer by acting out the in game relationship, turned into an actual romance IRL
>told the girl how I felt about her but she only sees me as a friend
>mfw I had to watch them fall in love IRL and in game
>mfw I have to pretend to be an NPC watching their characters fall in love
>mfw I know that his character is going to choose her character over the NPC, and I as the NPC will have to act out exactly what happened IRL

When is it supposed to stop hurting

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>>53116091
God fucking damnit I can't stop laughing

>i will report these findings to the group

>>53116030
No; but the snake, and the mice it ate, and the owl that eats the snake, are part of nature themselves. What you mean is that the landscape is artificial; but if the truck has been abandonned, nature has reclaimed it just like it reclaims old sunken ships for coral.

I don't think that cities are the correct environment for a druid to feel fully at home but there are plenty of ways he can bring nature to it by reclaiming manually this area with methods including, but not limited to, making plants grow in walls if he thinks that's funny or taking care of the local ecosystem.

>>53116052
I do. Foraging for garbage and foraging for berries that foxes pissed on, same thing to me; I have no taste buds.

>>53116052

Nah, it's because you are fed and kept in a non-settled or unfamiliar environment where resources are scarce. They give planar survival check information as well.

But you're autistic, so it's not worth arguing. Go find a hugbox.

>>53110916
>>I use natural 1's to dick with my players. Even to the point of killing them.

You need to stop that shit. Otherwise you are fine.

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>>53116151
fucking amazing

>>53110395
I have committed various sins involving my magical realm using Mutants and Masterminds/DC Adventures:

Playing DC Adventure: I played an 18 limbed insect broodmother monstergirl that would constantly get herself into awkward sexual encounters due to her "hormones" and ended up fucking a disguised Count Vertigo in a three way with a screaming (his powers) gay bruiser.

Running my own campaign: You guessed it, 6 breasted world-ending broodmother. But at least most of the players are actually into pregnancy. But even then, because I had essentially put the not-tastumaki player through a broodmother mutation and decided that "let's make this campaign about this now since I literally cannot focus on anything else", that campaign fell apart as desserved...of course it didn't help that two of the players invited a kaiju broodmother monstergirl as another character who ended up taking the spotlight for the rest of the campaign.

Running the solo campaign: But since kaiju girl's player was the only one up for talking with me on a semi-regular basis, I decided I really wanted to give the character a campaign of her own that...just had to continue from the first one and turn the plot into a trainwreck. One of the biggest complaints ends up being the exposition dump that happened due to the previous campaign beign unfinished and my bad judgement to pair. The other is the main villain is supposedly way too strong and that she feels she can't do nothing some of the time. She might find her odds better than expected this Monday, but FUCK, that doesn't change the fact that I feel I can't do anything write and some weird part of me always steers me in the exact worst decisions even when I plan in the other direction.

>>53116151
i feel like that's actually not good for your mental health at all anon

ive been in a similar situation before and the only thing that works is taking distance from the girl in question.

>>53116289
That is what happens when you play with your dick

>i methodically plan out entire timelines in which the players can act freely for the most part, where if they ignore the obvious evil plotting they will face a full wipe with no chance of survival

>i intentionally go out of my way to counter munchkins or problem players abilities or skills with the patience of a torturer, i once had a player just ask for me to kill their character and be done with it

>i will throw monsters at a group if they spend two hours jerking eachother off in the woods

>i have played Tucker Kobolds against players who complained the campaign was too easy, even if other members in the group were struggling

I'm not sure any of these are too egregious, but I've felt pretty guilty about them before.

>>53116299
Believe me I want to, but this is the best campaign I've ever run, and all the players are having tons of fun with it. I don't want to ruin it for them because I'm too much of a bitch to leave my emotions out it.

>>53116371

Who the fuck cares?

Burn it down. The game ain't worth you killing yourself over it.

If you do go double murder/suicide post a thread first though.

>>53110490
wow that guy sounds like such an ass, would he rather he just be on a little fantasy themed disney ride where nothing can hurt him?

>>53116399
>Burn it down. The game ain't worth you killing yourself over it.

If you do decide to kill yourself. Write a green text first so we can read it. Betafag.

>>53115963

WTF?

>>53115662
lmao. "nature is exactly what I say it is fuck of faggot"

/tg/ really has gone downhill if autists like you are hanging around.

>>53112216
don't knock it till you try it friendo, it's pretty great.

>>53114520
>I can't even think about trying to put myself in someone else's shoes
Yup, smells like /pol/.

>>53116340
In my defense, I was getting very mixed messages. Also, having to chose between what the actual conversational player wanted and those who wouldn't say anything until the last minute players did not help.

But even without the magical realm issues, the campaign was an unfocused mess. In the first campaign I ran, the villain was nowhere to be seen for several sessions and the players were just sent to do monster hunting jobs. It's such a shame since the prologue sessions leading into the main campaign actually went pretty well.

One of the players I had so many hooks planned for flaked on a constant basis, only 10% of the time for good reason. Several other players, even when having full access to the core rule book, which is honestly all you need for even running the system, complained about not understanding how combat worked. I also had to make their character sheets for them.

>>53110395
5E is utter shit and I would be happier if it never existed because at least that way I would have never been roped into wasting my time on it and wouldn't have people begging me to play it weekly even though they KNOW I fucking hate its guts.

>>53116577

But 99% of fluff from RPGs these days is decidedly left of center. What would be wrong with right wingers making their own shit? Hell, may be a change of pace at least.

>>53116622
Thats not what I'm talking about tho. I didn't say anything about right or left.
Regardless of politics, not being able to try and imagine what the world must be through the eyes of someone else, or at least try, is the mark of an asshole. And there are lots and lots of people like that on /pol/.

>>53116758

I know plenty of rich folks who don't get poverty. City folk who don't understand rural life and vice versa. Black who don't get white and vice versa.

I think its more comforting for us to have a bogeyman in /pol/

>>53110395
>Orcs/goblins behave like niggers
literally nothing to confess

>>53116758
>waaah muh /pol/ boogeyman
People like you enjoy being richeously indignant far too much for your own good.

>>53110395
I hate how I went That Guy and pushed an intra-party conflict with a problem player thinking there would be a suitably satisfying explosive character-growth payoff without thinking of how the GM and other players were having fun, and subsequently had the game fall apart and abandoned with no good conclusion when scheduling conflicts led to no game.

I hate how the aforementioned problem player then makes a campaign in an attempt to prove that my and his character can get along, but invites the guy he had scheduling conflicts with and the game dies.

I hate how the aforementioned player only rolls up Fighters and Rogues, and then says that he's tried every character option.

I hate how the schedule conflict guy only rolls casters but isn't that good at roleplay to the point where his Pelor cleric is informed of an undead infestation and responds "what do you want me to do about it?"

I hate how our GM started up a fresh side-campaign to introduce the new guy in the group to the setting, burned out of ideas, and is now getting Stockholm Syndrome'd into HackMaster with his IRL crew.

I hate how whenever the meek characters fail horribly at being party face they never let me try to face instead because my character is too quirky.

I am a massive ruleslawyer, but only when people ignore the rules so hard that even reality says "fuck off" or "people just aren't seeing reason"

I hate myself for hating so much of my gaming group, because I know that everyone except aforementioned has a valid excuse for such.

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>>53116289
Jesus Anon.

>>53115963
I think that argument was that it was a dick move for the dm to put ladders in for the sole purpose of fucking the druid.

But yes, there was a lot of buttmad from druid players.

>>53115960
I'm a political criminal (the government in my country is corrupt as fuck, so that's not really a good indicator).
It was either being jailed and then god knows what, or faking madness and house arrest for about a year and then being under very, very liberal surveillance (so liberal that I can post about it on Internet, provided it's done anonymously).

>>53115960
>>53117243
Also, if you want to ask me what country - it's Russia.

I hate all my players.
I don't hate them as people. They're good friends, pretty fun to play vidya with, and when we just chat and do dumb shit, its fun.
But goddamn I hate all of them as players.

I hate you, Snowflake, because you can't fucking stand to not be the best at everything. "Oh noes my social charcter isn't as good as the combat character at combat. Oh no, my combat character isn't as good at magic as the wizard, a bloo bloo bloo. I better switch and remake my character"
I also hate you for not being able to take any sort of improvization. You can't handle anything done to your character unless its in the exact manner you want, but you insist on being the leader or the plot reason the party is together. I dread the game you're planning to run because I know its just going to be absolutely contrived and full of awful fucking forced social commentary.

I hate you, Magical Realm, because you think you're cleverer than you are. "You go to a town, now what?" is the GMing equivalent of giving someone a blank sheet of paper, telling them to draw on it, and then walking out of the room. It's even worse when you force timeskips because "nothing's happening right now" when I am actively trying to engage in unorganized RP with the rest of the party.

I hate you, Shitposter, because you act like you know what you're doing, and are interested in an idea, but then won't put forth the lowest form of effort to just read the damn book or setting or rules or party makeup. I've literally watched you go through character creation by randomly picking options off a list, without even looking at what they do, after you specifically asked me to run this game.

I hate that I'm a gamist. I hate that I literally can't stop thinking of these things in terms of a game that I can win. I can't do character builds that are sub-optimal. I can't fucking stand low-rules systems, or systems that are blatantly unbalanced that have a disclaimer that says "guys play nice".

I have a buddy who I run for that is OCD about clues and overthinks things by a million. One time I gave him a very direct clue which explained the missing password, but I put gibberish in the corners intentionally so it would mess with him. And it did.

>>53116151
is that how you cuck yourself?

>>53117270
Dude. I would say, I can't even really believe it. But at least you wouldn't be a weirdo and therefore you could be a potential player online.

>>53117400
>I hate you, Magical Realm, because you think you're cleverer than you are. "You go to a town, now what?" is the GMing equivalent of giving someone a blank sheet of paper, telling them to draw on it, and then walking out of the room. It's even worse when you force timeskips because "nothing's happening right now" when I am actively trying to engage in unorganized RP with the rest of the party.

But... That's not Magical Realm. Magical Realm is sexual fetishes pushing into game.

>>53117539
I'm referring to him as such because he slides that shit in there too, but I don't actually care about it. This shit bothers me even more than someone playing a furry with a six-foot horsecock if he actually cares about his character.

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I can't enjoy anything when I have metaknowledge. If the GM tells me what he's planning on doing, I no longer want to be part of it. If we're fighting some monster with a weakness, I take no pleasure in defeating it that way if I already know the weakness out of character. I've literally kept parts of in-character plans away from the GM because there's no satisfaction in achieving them when he knows, because it becomes clear that he just let you do it.
Also I'm fucking sick of political intrigue in games holy shit, I just want a single chance to play a murderhobo and fight dragons and save princesses and shit. I hate this fucking board for perpetuating that high combat, rules intensive games are bad, to the point where dnd 4e threads get trolled into oblivion and garbage like dungeon world get hailed as art.

>>53116758

> Regardless of politics, not being able to try and imagine what the world must be through the eyes of someone else, or at least try, is the mark of an asshole.

Why are you obliged to do that? This isn't Gundam.

>>53115662
Cities are the bane of nature, but fuck man, if a player wants to make a crazy hobo druid who lives in the sewers and controls weeds and wild dogs let him. That's a cool concept

>>53115826
I mean it is a game that's selling point is you can do almost anything you want

>>53117894
>controls weeds
Ooh... So he's a drug lord.

>>53113477
>>53113968
god just play 5e then so the mechanics are so linear you can enforce your boring life on your players without being a pita to play with

>>53110395
I play female characters because I'm transgender, but nobody knows. No one will ever know.

>>53110555
Hamlet is that you?

>>53118088
I know, Anon. Now do we all. We shall hunt you and eat your heart.

>>53110395
I slept with the on-again, off-again gf of one of my players, when I thought they had broken up for good. They didn't, and she told him, and that started a shitstorm, and I became a persona non grata in the group. Because I'm the only one there who can DM for crap, it's now essentially imploded.

>>53110395
I fucking hate you fags. I only run games for you losers out of pity.

You're all a barrel of obnoxious entitled children. Those few of you who have barely managed to make something of yourselves are even worse, always finding or creating some way to remind everyone else that you have a 9-5 job and a cum dumpster who was willing to put up with your shit long enough to gestate some ugly as fuck piece of whiny shit that you can barely call a baby.

You bitch about all the fucking normies and libtards and /pol/cucks but not one of you can resist injecting references to this months pop-culture topic, some stale fucking "le jews kek" memery, or some shitty reasoning for how "socialism works bruh, it's just never actually been tried before." You cock gurgling sluts need to learn how to leave your fucking out of character references and ideology at the door.

And GOD FOR-FUCKING-BID there's some cunt with a vagina in the party. I could supply Olive Garden with enough crappy, soybean based, spaghetti to crash the global pasta market and end world hunger if only I could find a way to harvest the shit you boys start dropping everywhere.

Don't even get me started on how flakey you autistic fucking snowflakes are. I will never fucking understand how I can run a game for four fucking years in the real fucking world at my FLGS but you fucking nutbags can't commit two hours of your life on a fucking Sunday morning, afternoon, or evening, to a game you fucking asked me to design and run for you and the dead weight turds that you call friends.

Also, to all you fucks outside the US. STOP FUCKING APOLOGIZING FOR YOUR FUCKING ACCENTS AND JUST FUCKING PLAY THE GAME. AND LEARN FUCKING ENGLISH BEFORE TRYING TO READ THE FUCKING RULEBOOK THAT WAS PUBLISHED IN THE MOTHER FUCKING UNITED FUCKING STATES.

I'm done now. Thanks for the quality thread OP, you faggot.

>>53118152
I like you.

>>53110395
I used the same spoon to put sugar in my tea that I used to take the teabag out of the tea.

>>53118236
As a non-British person, I must ask what's the problem with that?

>>53118267
There is now tea in the sugar. I can already feel the tremors as the foundations of my flat block begin to give way. I have consigned them all to oblivion by putting my own laziness before their safety.

Why?! Why didn't I just use another spoon?! He is coming now, coming up from below, I can hear-...

>>53118152
>capitalist

I no longer regard your opinion as valuable

Even though you were kinda right

>>53118299
But the sugar's going in the tea momentarily anyway.

>>53118323
No, no, you don't understand...the tea has now tainted the plastic tub in which the sugar is kept. It doesn't matter how much sugar I pour out, the tea has been in it!

There can be no going back, no aversion from this course. I am consigned to my wretched fate. He is here...

>>53118345
Ah, I see what you mean. I had not considered the sugar container. In my previous, limited experiences with tea it's always been those little paper packets with sugar in them that were available.

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>>53118152
>Implying Americans can speak English

>>53118323
You American piglets. I'm not even British and I find that gross. Have some manners.

>>53118379
Help m-!

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>>53118236
heathen

>>53116876
>richeously
Jesus fucking Christ, anon. Literally any device you could have used has built-in spellcheck, if not just access to Google.
You don't get to rip on someone for being "wrong" while actively flipping off the written language like that.
That's straight up laziness. All this technology, and you choose to be wrong.

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>>53116876
>richeously

>>53118451
It's okay. HE has taken me, to repent for my cosmic transgression.

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>>53118404
>got a bad rating in a TOEFL test for speaking proper english

fuck you

I dont give a single fuck about actual stats on encounters, and will slightly cheat to make the fight be as long or short or interesting as I intend it to be, merely taking inspiration from the dice.
For example, player gets 7 damage dice off
Do I want to show how tough the enemy vampire is? Oh he totaly has Fortitude 4.
Is it just some trashmob? I explain in vivid detail how the cut slashed through the arm and the torso of the shovelhead, leaving only dust behind moments later.

>>53112907
Nothing wrong with this desu, and I don't even have a multiclass hate boner. If anything it's the only sensible option given that a fighter wouldn't randomly pick up a wizard's spell casting ability just from killing a few monsters.

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>>53110395
I really, really, really fucking hate your plot twist DM. Not only does it not match your setting but you're just lazily porting your favorite video game into a setting it doesn't match /at all/. I know you're better than this and it kills me to watch you be so lazy but I'm three seconds from staging a coup and installing a new DM

I wish I could pay one of our players for casual sex but we're both in our own relationships. I don't want anything serious out of it. I don't want to ruin anything we all have going for us but god damn I would pin her to the wall and bust a nut in every hole she has

One of our long term players is tolerably abrasive but lately I'm just hoping he dies in a car accident on the way over. Fuck you Mike don't take my shit without asking like a functioning adult first. And apologize to the DM already for making a mess in his car you dense fuck

One time I noticed that previously mentioned grill player showed up with a low intensity vibrator in her and it was occasionally making her chair rumble, which she didn't notice for a while. I waited until after our game when everyone went to the pool and jerked off into her panties.

I've never used metagaming to my immediate advantage but I fudged a die roll once in a boss encounter and still feel kinda guilty about it for some reason

I actively prey on players who think they're the "destined chosen hero of legend" or shit like that

I feel extreme guilt when I leave a campaign unfinished when I really shouldn't since my games are always cut off due to health issues

I didn't use a coaster once

>>53110395
I make excuses to avoid my groups outside of actual play. There's nothing wrong with any of them and I enjoy the game enough to want to keep playing, but I genuinely don't want to make friends despite having no issues with anxiety or communication.

My only goal as a GM of about six years is to ruin one players enjoyment of the game as subtly as I possibly can due to a slight he made against me when we were growing up together.

That gentle spitefulness is literally the only pleasure I derive from forever-GMing.

My game exists because my previous game ended because of Those Guys and I don't accept how things ended up for my PC, which I made an NPC.

Go fuck yourself, you faggots. No wonder the best players of your former group play with me now.

>>53118152
>And GOD FOR-FUCKING-BID there's some cunt with a vagina in the party. I could supply Olive Garden with enough crappy, soybean based, spaghetti to crash the global pasta market and end world hunger if only I could find a way to harvest the shit you boys start dropping everywhere.
Sorry

>>53110567
typical stormfag

>>53119796
>jerked off into her panties.
What the fuck dude. And what the fuck dudette too who comes to a game with a vibrator?

>>53120717
>who comes to a game with a vibrator

My mom?

>>53120717
She's a pervert and I'm a degenerate. I don't think anyone knows of our individual power levels though

>>53120731
Tell your mom to call me

>>53120738
>Tell your mom to call me
Fine, but you're picking her up this time. I'm not waiting in the car again.
You also promised we'd play some ttrpgs after you got done "talking" to her alone, and you failed to honor your end of the bargain.

>>53120738
>She's a pervert and I'm a degenerate
And she games?

I see potential here anon.

>>53114786
>whaaa people have the wrong kind of fun I won't let a player play something because I don't agree whaaa

>>53120941
>Waaaa Waaaa.......i wanna play a nature guy who lives in the city!
>I wanna play a cleric who doesn't believe in a god

You faggots......sheesh

I've never read an actual RPG rulebook.
Yet I run 3 groups with my own homebrew systems based on things I've heard and my own ideas.
So far, everything has worked out pretty well.

>>53120956
That's an awful example and you know it.

>>53115662
if you are this autistic your games must be fuuuun

>>53110395
I am the worst GM in my group, but I still actively try to run my games over my friends because im a massive attention whore who cant handle 5 seconds without the spot light

>>53116151
don't run the game again then lol, or just you know ignore it, she said no now it's time to move on

>>53120968
It's really pretty accurate desu

>>53121644
It's been done.
It's like saying
>Waaaa Waaaa.......i wanna play a nature guy who plays in the city
>I wanna fly in a vehicle heavier than air

>>53122043
Holy shit, I knew /tg/ moved on glacial time but this argument has been going on since my son was born.

>>53122074
My branch has only been going on for an hour.
That was a bad example.

>>53110395
I homebrew for Dungeons the Dragoning.

>>53118459
>>53118474
>hurr hurr muh bad spelling
We've reached levels of deflection that shouldn't be possible

>>53122093
Fucking hell, this has branching paths now too? How deep are we?

>>53121644
Not really, because that example is comparing someone displaced from their stereotype that can still function in many examples (park manager, environmental lobbyist, rooftop farmer, previously-mentioned sewer druids) to something that is such a blatant contradiction that the only feasible loophole is to say their religion is Atheism and that they're playing a wizard with WIS and a cleric's spell list.

A better example would be along the lines of:
>I wanna play a fighter that doesn't kill people
Instead, that anon went with
>I wanna play a Paladin, but I don't have an oath so I can act however I want (probably plays CN)

>>53122397
>not playing lethal classes as non-lethal

anon it's like you've never even tried to have fun

>>53122577
>implying I haven't actually tried that
'Tis merely a point being made anon, I've played my fair share of shorter-ranged blunt-tipped-arrow archer before the campaign fell apart. A damn shame too, he made a good contrast with Humalefiter "Cleaving Crits" MacGutsword

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>>53110567
>im INSANE!! >:D
The fuck is your problem?

>>53112830
Haven't you ever run into a real hard-ass psychopath urban black? It's pretty scary, and if he can project that on to orcs more power to him. Remember, around blacks (and orcs) never relax.

My hoard of pirated RPG PDFs (mostly predating Da Archive by a few years) is one of the great achievements of my life and I spend time literally reveling in it on a near-daily basis.

>>53114347
Have you watched anything made by Hollywood?

>>53123182
>Remember, around blacks (and orcs) never relax.

Redundant.

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>>53110916
I wanna know the circumstances of fungal avoidance

My confession is that I have never played a tabletop, only read stories and rulebooks. While I desperately want to play, circumstances are limiting right now.

Even worse, I want to play a chaotic neutral rogue that's basically a self-insert in terms of personality, just to ease myself into roleplaying

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>>53120778
Not who you replied to, but I like you very much

>>53115662
>The crazy cat lady, isn't a fucking druid. She's a cat lady.
Actually gave me an idea

>>53110395
I actually want to be as much of a good player as I can be, both in game and on the social side.
Just so nothing bad happens between the group so it doesn't dissolve. The stories I read here are really frightful.
However inside the group of 9 potentiel players I have I know that 5 of them are players I can play with without having to worry about the game going out of bounds too much

>>53111459
>"Sheeeit, I want dem Jordans!"
>"Mikey got shot by da polese!"

He said no *good* reasons.

>>53118152
>mfw I will never be this anon's boypussy cuck cumdumpster
>mfw this anon will never GM for me while I secretly fall in love with him and never tell him
>mfw I can't apologise to this anon for my shitty accent, and then kiss him on the asscheeks to beg for his forgiveness for apologizing
why live

>>53117400
You are the worst of all.

But you're forgiven

>>53118088
Now we know
And therefore all the internet knows

I only ever play Kingdom Death Monster alone, because it feels like a magical realm and I just can't bring anybody into a game hat feels like fetish fuel for despair nuts.
Even if I personally think the game is way more hopeful than many a player thinks.

Also, I've tried playing Call of Cthulhu, but I hate the systems too much to finish designing a campaign for it. No matter how much my players ask.

>>53110395
I think I might be that DM

>party's dealing with BBEG who controls a shit ton of undead
>party have a bunch of sending stones, one of the pairs is to the BBEG
>BBEG tells party to go get the ashes of another PC and return to the forst
>party realizes NPC Dad might know some shit
>NPC dad explains that he .wasn't taking any chances with undead shit cause mama didn't raise an idiot so he hid the ahses himself and the ashes that are his tomb is just a jar of dirt
>party had the sending stone that connected to BBEG the entire time
>party decides to pull the heist regardless, realize BBEG has been listening to most of their conversations break the stone and decide to fuck off in another direction
>off screen had BBEG invade NPC dad's home because fuc the party and undead NPC dad could be useful
>actually did some simplified roling and set DCs for various people
>made dad's DC a 14
>rolls a 6
>with adavantage
>Players had no idea for awhile but they get roped into a civil war and decide it'd be smart to pick up NPC Dad and his wife to help out
>party shows up town's nearly fucking empty
>one of the BBEG's lieutenants is just chilling NPC Dad's home
>everyone is surprised that everyone's probably dead
>explain to particular player that I did legitiamtely roll for it
>says its cool and is glad that I wasn't being a complete dick
>later get to some other fight
>another player's wife is captured
>bad guy casts lightning bolt and manages to hit damn near everyone including the wife
>let the wife drop to 0 instead of autokill so I can death saving throws
>half the party are paladins so she's okay
>PC that lost his dad is grumbling a little

I feel like shit cause I know its scummy to kill off players families and shit. I felt really terrible about the dad so I was puling my punches this time around so now it looks like I'm playing favorites and I don't know how to move forward.

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>>53115662
>I have grass in my yard. That doesn't make my yard "nature". Its a fucking yard.

Anon, you are pic related through and through.

>>53110395
>Our D&D games violate a RAW every single game
So what? I'm not sure I've ever played a game strictly by the RAW in my entire life. Something always gets changed, and honestly, that's a good thing. The rulebook isn't some bible you must follow to the letter. It's a guide to help you out, and should be disregarded if it starts to get in the way.

>When one player wanted to invite his wife to play (i don't like her), I told him that we had a new guy coming that day, and his wife would make too many people.
Another non-optimal way of dealing with things, but not exactly a crime. You can't exactly say "I don't like your wife, so I don't want to play with her."

>I insert subtle racism into my games. Orcs/goblins often behave like Detroit urban dwellers. They rob/riot/kill for no good reason.
Orcs and goblins are pretty much supposed to be despicable, irredeemable savages. They're there so you can butcher monsters without compunction. The only troubling part is that you seem to be connecting them to real-world racism.

>>53118688
TOEFL is the biggest scam in the world. "Sorry anon, your made the test three years ago, so it's no longer valid and you don't know english"
Well fuck you I hope your son dies of cancer, how's that for english.

>>53124815
I'm having to post this piecemeal as it apparently doesn't like some of my text and keeps giving me a connection error when I try to post the whole thing.

>One of my players irks me. He's fine IG, no issues, but I don't like the PLAYER. And when I roll to see which PC a monster attacks, I've often had it attack him, just because of that.
I'd avoid this if for no other reason than it undermines the integrity of your game. And, aside from the fact that you shouldn't be cheating to fuck over a player (which is, I would imagine, the thing you're looking at), I doubt it really accomplishes anything.

>>53124815
>>53124830
>>53110395
>I lied to my players about not being able to 'think up anything', when we play other games, just so I can play and not have to GM it.
I mean, ideally you want to just have an honest conversation with everybody, but people can be tricky to deal with, so I don't think there's anything morally wrong with this. It's not optimum, but there may be no optimum choice.

>>53124833
Okay, that was apparently the passage that I couldn't post, but once I added the links to my earlier two posts in front of the one to the OP, it worked fine.

I homebrewed an entire system because I couldn't be bothered learning a new system.

I stand by my decisions.

>>53118345
>Keeping sugar in a plastic container
Filthy peasant, get a sugar bowl

>>53110927
Story time!
This harkens back to my early days of dm'ing. The party consisting of a human fighter, human spellsword, human cleric, tiefling rogue, halfling bard and elven mage where traversing a massive forest, hard on the trail of cultists whom had kidnapped the fighters sister and unleashed a possessed dire boar on a village (level 6 encounter. My players used cunnin and beat it at level 1).

A day in, and they decided to start looking for items to supplement their rations. Dear, herbs, and other such stuff. Everyone is searching when the tiefling finds some mushrooms.
>roll wilderness to identify
>>Nat 1
>They are good eating
And so did the tiefling rogue eat a hallucinogenic mushroom. So, he starts rolling around, giggling at the pink cattle and floaty things vomiting rainbows and the rest of the party goes to investigate. In the end he is tied too a pole and carried by the fighter and cleric, until the drugs wear off some hours later.
Now, this would be the end of things if it where not for the cleric.
You see, as the halfling was cooking up that night and the cleric decided to find something to add to the stew.
>roll search
>>12
>you find some mushrooms
>are they okay to eat
>roll wilderness
>>Nat 1
>they are amazingly good for you and taste delicious
>I add them to the stew
You can guess what happens next.
Only the fighter and spellsword abstained from eating. And so the party went on a bad trip.
The tree elf sitting in a tree suddenly realised that it was all a joke, and that the trees he venerated where in fact evil man eaters whom where going to devour him alive.
The cleric looked up and saw the fighter for what he truly was, a champion of the dark gods sent to test him.
The halfling looked into the fire content and happy and. ... wait. This was no fire, it was the mouth of he'll and her comrades where demons wanting to rape and torture her for all eternity.
The tiefling passed his test fine.

Want to hear more?

>>53124940
Fuck yes I do.
I'm chuckling heartily. This is great.

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>confession thread
>all those guys using it as an excuse to complain about other people with huge paragraphs

That's not what I came here for

>>53117243
>>53117270
So you can't leave the house without assuming some twitching, gibbering persona who talks to himself in public? And you can't leave the country neither, or go on vacations..

That must get weary, anon.

>>53110916
I, for one, cannot forgive you.

>>53115812
wow fuck that guy

I know the rules enough, but when we play I only care about them enough to enforce them if the players care.

I hate one of my players and do everything i can to ignore him in game and out.

I once played a dwarf just so I could bring beer to a game because I'm an alcoholic.

I am so burnt out on DMing. I just want to play again.

>>53116151
Just bail my dude. Now, before it's too late

>tired of living
>don't want to suddenly leave a campaign
>sessions are slower and have occured less often
Hopefully, now that the GM is done his semester, I can find a way to have my character exit the stage.

>>53116151
Obviously the only answer is kidnap and murder. First in the game, then mirror your actions in real life.

>>53118088
You are not as smart as you seem to think you are, let me tell you.

>>53116151
Dude, hit the eject button on that shit. The NPC gets killed or at least put out of commission in the next big battle. Or they see which way the wind is blowing and just take off in the middle of the night. Or something from their past comes up and leads them to change the course of their life (they discover they have a kid with the-one-that-got-away, or they're needed to be an integral part of something that means turning their back on their old life). Or maybe they fall in love with somebody else, like a lightning bolt out of the blue. Or they're brainwashed, or have already been brainwashed and have been a sleeper agent of sorts. Or helm of opposite alignment. Or any number of things. There's no need to suffer through that shit.

>>53116151
>allowing yourself to fall in love with just anyone

Jesus fucking Christ anon, harden your heart. You have to take care of that thing or it's going to get broken easily. Don't make the same mistakes I have. And I was careful.

When I start to think about her I spend all night driving around town, hanging out at gas stations and smoking a lot.

>>53124925
Please, have mercy!

>>53124319

No one wants to fuck your ugly ass.

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>dying to play in a superhero setting using mutants and masterminds or something
>spend hours trying to learn rules
>come up with three or four characters of varying backgrounds, abilities and power levels
>never get to play with anyone
>afraid to fuck up and annoy others

Just kill me. At this point I should just get the desire out of my system by writing a book.

>implying I have the talent or motivation

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I've had it with DMing for my group of friends, and knowing none of them will actually step up I've been running the same fucking campaign with them 7 times now, just changing names, and making it set in the desert instead of some normal, europe-like area, and small changes like that, but the story is just always the fucking same

On top of that I don't even look at what number I roll on a die behind my screen, just say the result depending on how I feel like it, same with enemies dying and shit, I just lost it.

Maybe one fucking day they'll realize "hey, anon is running the same shit again, what's up with that?"

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>>53110567

>Ok anon, say it now, get it out in the open, and off of your chest.
>We won't judge you (well, there might be a little judgement), and you'll feel better for saying it.

>>53112216
>>53114347
>>53120706
>>53123117

>Except for those faggots. They'll judge you all the way. So much for the tolerant nice guys masks I guess.

>>53125959
Your rejection only makes my ugly ass drool and rage with more inner fire for you...

>>53115754
When was the last time you did a nature check to find a specific lake or cave?
That stuff is area knowledge or survival/tracking man.

>>53118459
>>53118474

The delfector-shields are well-maintained on that ship.

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>>53120778

Ha, well played anon.

I run one-shots because GMing severely worsens my depression, but I need games. I keep asking other people to GM.
>but you do so well!

>>53126045
I'm sorry I insulted your very special and important views anon. You're a very special snowflake so don't feel sad!

Is that more what you were looking for?

faggot

I must confess, whenever the DM says a monster's name I memorize all the stats because I have a photographic memory.

>>53126181

Now that's a proper confession. You're all forgiven son.

>>53116408
He probably had a rough day. The enemy had an impact weapon without the slow quality. It also got a surprise round and was able to blink 10 feet once as a half action.

>>53122325
>>53126088
Actually he was having a rel conversation and making good points then one of you just insulted him without saying anything else. When someone resorts to that level of ad hominem there isn't much else to say to them other than to point out how stupid they are, insult them back and stop talking to them.

"Deflecting" implies he was deflecting from some point you made but no one made a point, someone just called him self righteous without explaining why they thought that. That's an insult not a talking point.

>>53118152
>And GOD FOR-FUCKING-BID there's some cunt with a vagina in the party. I could supply Olive Garden with enough crappy, soybean based, spaghetti to crash the global pasta market and end world hunger if only I could find a way to harvest the shit you boys start dropping everywhere.
I'm fucking dying anon.

>>53117682
>I have no responsibility to coexist with other people
You don't need to be in an anime to be a dumb villain, anon. Empathy is a thing you ostensibly have, unless you're an autist, so use it

>>53122043
But only one of these things is impos-
>Fly spell
Neither of these things are impossible in a fantasy setting!

>>53122043
>fly in a vehicle heavier than air
Anon, have you not heard of these new things called Aeroplanes?

>>53126713
>Empathy is a thing you ostensibly have
99% of the time, when faggots talk about Empathy, they are the one's who can't apply it.

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I burnt bridges with the best group I ever had, because I had a series of mental breakdowns and didn't tell them that I'll need to be leaving for treatment. When I came back, I masked it as "emergency vacation" and then they stopped talking to me. The worst part is that because of that I hate them now so much and don't want to mend fences. I'd rather endlessly browse roll20 until lightning strikes twice than try to explain my mental issues to a bunch of faux-friendly diet /pol/acks.

>>53128383
Mental health puts certain things into perspective, ie human honesty.

>>53127898
You don't need to be a psychopath to act like one. On the contrary of a "normal" person, the psychopath will never single you out personally; it only so happens that what he wants requires you to be hurt.

I've grown tired of all the elf hate
I just don't care anymore to pointlessly complain about elves just because they exist

>>53128469
(cont) You know what, an addendum. Imagine the Psychopath as Lawful Evil and the Sociopath as Chaotic Evil.

Yet, they only account for 50% of violent crimes. The 50 other % are therefore people with empathy.

Also having the Antisocial Disorder does not mean at all you're going to be a criminal. Violent psychopaths are violent for the same reasons everyone else is violent, it's mostly raising conditions, such as abusive families.

>>53127898
Sorry, anon, but you were the one arguing against the need to do it, so what's with the change of heart all of a sudden?

Society requires people to not throw a hissy fit every ten minutes over something retarded so that it can keep working as efficiently as we can make it. Maybe you're some magical creature who can tell exactly when not to be empathetic, but generally speaking you solve a lot more problems by trying to understand other people. Sometimes people can mislead your empathy, but that's not a reason to stop using it altogether, and the more stupid shit you advocate the more society's going to see the need to *institute* ways to force you to see things their way.

>>53125105
Nowadays I can leave the house just fine. But anything that involves governmental shit or presenting an ID is a nightmare.
For example, I can't do anything that requires presenting an identification - that includes everything from buying liquor and making a contract with my local ISP, to buying drugs in apothecary and driving a car. I can't even order shit online or use a credit card.
It's still fucking retarded, because I'm usually too paranoid to use my real name in public, because of how zombified our country is.

I mean, thankfully, it's Russia, so you can usually bribe someone to get what you want.

>>53128598
>Those alignments
Psychopath is Chaotic Evil
Sociopath is Chaotic Neutral

Sociopaths can sometimes form bonds, which can actually drive them to selfless actions if that bond is strong enough, even though they don't really do it out of love, more than anything they do it because they feel they should, or they want to.

Psychopaths are what you envision when you say the word, cold, unfeeling, fake, only out for themselves.

>>53129169
They don't have those little cash for card cards in russia?

>>53124611
Just grow a pair. If the dice say someone dies,they die. Don't be wish-washy about that shit. Become the DM they all fear

>>53129214
We have QIWI terminals, and I can use those just fine, but I can't do anything that involves international transactions.

I hate playing D&D with my friends, I find it easier to play with strangers who I only see at game night.

>>53125045
I will, once this device stops spazzing out. Maybe later.

>>53129244
Could always send someone you trust money and have them order it for you.
It'd be in their name going to your address, I'm not sure how mail works in russia, but you don't have to check IDs to recieve mail in the US

>>53118152
Anon. I'm right there with you.

>>53129301
>Could always send someone you trust money and have them order it for you.
That's pretty much what I do regarding everything that doesn't need to involve me personally, yes.

>>53129319
Why not seek asylum from another country?
I'm sure a neutral country would take you, like the swiss.

>>53129410
>Why not seek asylum from another country?

>My country doesn't let me play ttrpgs!
>May I come live in yours?
>"No, gtfo nerd"

>>53110821
Pretty much what this anon said >>53112148
If you give in, it only gets worse

Believe in yourself, anon

>>53119796
I wish you would

>>53116344
I don't know about the munchkin thing. I like making very potentially powerful characters myself, but not actually using that cheese outside of very dire straits. (See: The more egregious Divine Metamagic uses.) If you just look at someone's character sheet and then suddenlt warp the world to make them a commoner with a bunch of Lorem Ipsum on their sheet I think that's being a dick move if they were actually planning on using it as a mechanically supported way to create a dramatic, heroic moment. If they prove they're just trying to break the game then I guess it's fine to punish them a bit to teach them a lesson, but I'd still rather just talk to them about it.

>>53128383

I know the feel.

>>53129410
I tried, it didn't work out. Besides, despite the fact that I'm being treated as a non-person officially here, I don't want to leave my property behind.
Between being a refugee and being an actual citizen (even if limited in rights), I'll take my chances.

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>>53130058
>constantly share fun sounding ideas for campaigns that I never feel compelled to follow through on
>keep baiting my players with ideas because I love to see them interested, but during actual sessions that interest peeters out and I can only count on the two that are GMs in a 5 pc group, so I never go through with it
I just like that spark of interest so much, but me and the other GMs all lament how inactive our players are, it kills our drives

I absolutely hate 3 of the 5 people I used to play with. They're all old men who spend 2/3rds of the game arguing over rules or in-fighting, and have literally spent 30 minutes on a single action because of it.

So when I had the opportunity to literally nuke a game, I took it. Even though it was the most fun game we had played thus far, they were all going off the rails and I was totally fine with wiping it all from the face of the Earth, just to one time make them feel the fucking frustration I feel with them every session.

The other two guys are great, though. One of them is a literal child, but he's adorable, so it's all good.

My GM almost always runs "blank slate/sandbox" games when he doesn't run Exalted and I'm 90% sure it's so that he can inject whatever new rulebook comes out whenever he feels like it.
>kingdom builder game
>reclaim a city from natives
>they were wearing and wielding suspiciously high quality equipment
>they were lead to war by a nature spirit
>investigate
>it's a fucking Starjammer ship that crash landed
>what
>goes into the setting background deeper than when we started the campaign to explain that the reason so much of the world is unsettled is because it was getting overcrowded and a large majority of the population left on an exodus to other planets using these ships
Also, some of the players
>Player A is spoiled on Exalted, can't stand class based systems because he won't be able to easily do everything
>Player B shows up as late as anyone, talks for as long as anyone or longer, and bitches when we start late
>Player B is a Vigilante, DM basically makes it impossible to figure out her identity
>publicly she's the mayor, with us she's b-roll Robin Hood
>when we get back to town, every time she leaves the party without saying anything, sprints but sneaks back to her house, changes clothes, and is apparently completely convincing enough that they are separate people
>Player A also has a boner for Shadowrun even though we always get into "the rulebooks are formatted like shit, gear often doesn't make sense, this and that are pretty unbalanced and unusable, etc"

>>53129569
Anon, the delete button is on the bottom right part of the page, make sure to click the box next to "Anonymous" on your post before hitting delete
Once you realize your mistake, use this info.

>Not had the chance to play for years
>Get invited to a local group
>Everyone is nice and welcomes me in
>The GM is shit
>Favoritism, magical realm, the works
>Sit there thinking I can do so much better
>Suspect the guy who invited me only did so because he knows I GM a lot and he's sick of the GM

It's arrogant of me to want to take over a game I've only just joined, but holy shit I want to usurp this campaign.

>>53110647
>I want a player to justify WHY a nature lover, who's dedicated his life to nature, would constantly be in town, sleeping in Inns, exploring dungeons, and solving a murder mystery at the nobles castle.
Because you've railroaded the party into having to do such a thing.

I play D&D because it is my only reason to live anymore.

>Don't believe in love after family divorce, highschool sweetheart cheated, deployment fairly ghosted me and LTR decided she would rather get drunk and fuck random dudes then marry me, and after time in the army I have see more cheating and twisted relationships then I ever thought existed

>Don't believe in ideals, every person I've ever seen take an oath ether betrayed it or was screwed over because of it for some assholes benefit, both of which I've seen wreck lives.

>No faith, I spent every night on my birthday for a decade trying to talk to god, or anything, and plenty other night besides... and no answer.

>Friendship, my close friends that I had since I was single digits in age, that I turned down better schools to be with and other groups to hang out with. After I got out I realized after a few months I was the only one to visit, arrange meetups, ect. After I stopped organizing and driving to them all the time I went months without seeing them... I was the only one who gave a shit. After all those years of trying to keep us together. I just stopped trying after that.

I'm so tired, I'm still young but I'm so tired, inside. This new group of folks I play with... they keep me going, not that they know it. I'm really outgoing and cheerful with them so they hopefully never will know how much I need them.

I always just wanted a partner and good comrades... more then almost anything else.
That's all.

>>53131181
I'm sure you'll find something other than TTRPGs that'll rekindle you life, anon. I believe in you.

>>53131181
Don't let depression get the best of you.
And talk to a professional, it really helps. Especially when you're light on other people to talk to.

>>53110647
>I want a player to justify WHY a nature lover, who's dedicated his life to nature, would constantly be in town, sleeping in Inns, exploring dungeons, and solving a murder mystery at the nobles castle.

Because she's there for her friends.

>>53111459
>Not realizing that everything has a reason and nobody goes out and smashes shit for no reason unless they're just a 1-dimensional caricature of something you're afraid of understanding.
Some people are caricatures of people.

>>53119796
Okay...kinda weird but I guess you're forgiv-
>didn't use a coaster
>>/out/

>>53130942
Bam.

>>53129177
What? No. Sociopaths are literally the same as Psychopaths, but unlike them, they have a lot of trouble controlling themselves and are more likely to be uneducated and living on the fringe of society.

It is believed that Psychopaths are natural product, but Sociopaths are created by the environment.

In truth they wouldn't even fit in Evil if they're just nonviolent psychopaths. Many neurosurgeons are psychopaths and we're all the better for it.

>>53131635
>Many neurosurgeons are psychopaths and we're all the better for it.
Huh, that must explain why, after my botched brain surgery, my surgeon came into my hospital room, asked if I was happy for the surgery now, and never spoke to me again.

>>53131669
Like really, who do you want touching your brain? Some guy who will never wince and who prides himself on being the very best practician, the only one able to save you, and how much that makes him hard, or a meaty empathic that will fuckup and get sloppy because of his fear, and lack of perfectionism?

The three areas with the most psychopaths are CEOs, lawyers and surgeons.

>>53131718

>The three areas with the most psychopaths are CEOs, lawyers and surgeons.

And 2/3 of those professions are not trusted for it.

>>53131718
You're right, but the guy was still a dick.

>I haven't played any RPGs myself besides a few test encounters a friend did for me in DnD 3.5
>Since then, I've been obsessively looking for different games and systems that I'll never get to play

>I like Critical Role

>>53131737
Aha. I don't trust anyone in a position of power, psychopath or not.

>>53131748
I doubt you could tell if he was one. I'm sure what matters is technically that he's a dick, and I know both kinds of people are. I've found empaths to be much more petty dicks to me than any other kinds.

Also, glad for your recovery... Maybe?

>>53131635
>Wouldn't even fit evil.
They >only< fit evil, you said it yourself, they're not made, they are natural products. These products can not do good or feel empathy for others. They only do what benefits themselves, because it's what they want. It's how they are programmed,

That's like the textbook definition of a Chaotic Evil NPC. They don't have to run around killing people to lie, deceive, and only look out for themselves.

Also, Sociopaths are very similar to Psychopaths, but not the same. People interchange the words so often people assume they are the same thing, but they really aren't.

Psychopaths are completely incapable of EVER helping anyone if they did not benefit in some way.

>>53131787
Yeah, it happened 4 years ago. So I'm fine now. Thanks!
only lost partial vision in one of my eyes. and the surgery was technically a success, i just almost died in the process. no big deal.

>>53131792
That just makes them selfish. Evil is when we believe our morality is infringed by their actions. Better not start this argument again.

We idolize people with sociopathic traits all the time, so if you tell me that most people also say they're disgusted by it, I'd answer they're the bunch of emotional hypocrites I hate.

In westerns with Clint Eastwood the hero Manco exhibited a bunch of sociopathic traits and a lot of selfishness. He just wasn't a complete psychopath.

>Psychopaths are completely incapable of EVER helping anyone if they did not benefit in some way.
In truth, Anon, I believe we are all this selfish, but most of us delude ourselves in thinking there is such a thing as altruism. You give because it makes you feel good with yourself, that is in itself a reward you seek.

>>53110395

I am disgusted with one of my good friend's life choices and it bleeds into our games. I treat his characters and him probably a bit too harsh and he has no clue why.

>>53131181
>No faith, I spent every night on my birthday for a decade trying to talk to god, or anything, and plenty other night besides... and no answer.

>Friendship, my close friends that I had since I was single digits in age, that I turned down better schools to be with and other groups to hang out with. After I got out I realized after a few months I was the only one to visit, arrange meetups, ect. After I stopped organizing and driving to them all the time I went months without seeing them... I was the only one who gave a shit. After all those years of trying to keep us together. I just stopped trying after that.


Fuck me. I know these feels all too well, anon. I'd raise a glass for you, if I actually drank. Chin up. That's about the only advice I can give you.

>>53130942
>Because you've railroaded the party into having to do such a thing.

>Guys, why would your (x), be in a group of (x's)? Justify that for me please.
>ZOMG RAILROAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I have only recently learned that they are Rubric and not rubic marines. I thought that the guy who wrote the thousand sons fluff was just a huge fan of rubics cubes

>>53131849
Anon One-Eye.

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>>53131966
That's a good one.

>>53131862
> but most of us delude ourselves in thinking there is such a thing as altruism

Anon, I cannot agree with you more on this, which would make us all a psychopath, but of course I spoke in a sense of "This person thinks giving change to a homeless is altruistic"

But as opposed to a normal person, a psychopath would never give to the homeless without the thought of feeling good about themself, they'd embrace that feeling.

But I'm going to just let this argument peter out before it becomes a "This is what this alignment means" back and forth, so lets just agree to let this go with good graces.

>I deliberately flub rules in order to try and beat a friend who has stupid luck when it comes to war gaming of any kind. The closest I've gotten to beating I'm was in X-Wing Minis because the Slave-1 can't meanuever that well

>I fully admit that I once did some world-building but I named all he important locations after minor final fantasy characters (I.E.: Mt. Tot, Maechen's Point, the People's Theocracy of Bugenhagen)

>I've tried shoehorning a few memes in good social chats with friends. Sometimes it works, other times it falls flat

>I dislike how GW prices their models and am always looking for second-hand models or trying to find a cheap 3-d printer. Gunpla proved to be far cheaper

>>53132013
Well I have a friend who only sees from one eye, he has a huge beard and dreadlocks, he's a muscled beefcake with an Iron Maide battle jacket, and he had people call him himself Olaf.

We call him Olaf the One-Eye.

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>>53110395
>I want to write a lewd adventure path but I'm not sure where to start because I have little experience writing smut and am personally a permavirgin
>I have a deepest lore campaign on right now that I'm not really satisfied with. My players like it, but I honestly feel like it could be improved greatly
>Sometimes when drunk I shitpost about random things relevant to the thread I'm in
>I don't buy into /tg/'s (apparent) sense of cynicism, and honestly think that everything's going to work out for the better in the long run

>>53133048
>I don't buy into /tg/'s (apparent) sense of cynicism, and honestly think that everything's going to work out for the better in the long run
I think this is a good attitude for life in general.

Also, writing smut isn't that hard. Just read a bunch of it to get a feel for the word usage and stuff. Remember that it's better to describe the feeling, and actions that relate to the feeling (moaning, gripping at covers, digging nails into their back) than it is to describe the mechanics of sex.

>I bring large amounts of chocolate and candy to games to offer to my gaming group, because I feel that I am not an adequately entertaining gamer to play with, so I make people enjoy playing with me through other means.

>I have even done this at a national event.

>I have stopped playing with my online roleplay group because of this feeling.

>>53133107
I suffer from the same feelings, that's why I end up wanting to GM.

>>53133107
Tim, if this is you, you said you'd mail me some chocolate after our last session.

Its the only reason we let you keep playing, so pay up.

>>53131862
>In truth, Anon, I believe we are all this selfish, but most of us delude ourselves in thinking there is such a thing as altruism


I dunno anon, helping people for no reason makes me feel good. But does that mean I'm helping people to feel good, or that there is some abstract "good" inside me that compels me to help?

>>53133661
It's only a matter of time until Tim has to start sucking dick in order to be allowed to play.

>i just read up on order of the stick instead of writing an important essay that i now missed the deadline for

why do i keep doing this to myself
why do i ruin everything
help

>>53133772
>why do i keep doing this to myself
>why do i ruin everything
>help
Standard reaction to reading order of the stick

>>53133706
>start

Ha. Chocolate only took him two sessions. He's played 4.

>>53112907
I agree with this method as well. A little multiclassing is fine as long as it makes sense for the character's development. But when a new player enters the game with his 'already multiclassed idea of a Fighter/Monk/Rogue' I'll just say 'no' because that idea screams of a shallow powergaming character.

Learning how to be at level 1 actually takes time and effort depending on the edition or system. A Fighter is not a guy with a sword, if that were true than anything with a sword already had a level in Fighter.

>>53133772
Because you're scared of trying and failing so instead you don't try and then blame yourself which is causing low self esteem which perpetuates the cycle.

>>53110395
One of my players made me incredibly pissed off so I rewarded the fucker really low EXP for everything.
>Player and I hate each other
>Every week and sometimes everyday we have hour long arguments
>It kills fun and ruins shit for the whole group
>Player leaves to cool off and regain sanity
>The group has fun, nobody argues, everything is awesome
>I think the player is gone for good so I ask someone else if they'd like to play
>Dude says yes
>I invite him to our group and we get everything set up for him
>The player in question comes back to our group
>I'm pretty fucking angry but I maintain my cool and try to be kind
>Player says they want to play again
>I know that I don't want more than six players because I've seen GM's overburden themselves in the past. I know that overburdening the GM always kills a game
>I have my players vote to see who leaves the group because we are over our capacity for players
>Nobody wants to vote except for one person in the group
>Everyone gets pissy about the vote even though they had a chance to vote
>I fucking ban the player from playing with us until she can learn to stop snapping at everyone
>Everything is quiet for a few days
>Tabletop RPG's are one of the few enjoyable things left for me
>I'm getting really fucking worried that nobody will want to play anymore
>Eventually everything calms down and goes back to the way it was before
I have to say. She was the problem. Everything was fine until she started playing and everything has went back to being awesome now that she's gone again. I just pray that the bitch stays the fuck away because I don't feel like arguing with her.

Here's an example of her being a fucking cunt.
>I'm new to a system and don't remember all the rules
>She's rolling before saying her action and rule lawyering as a motherfucker
>Eventually it gets so frustrating that I just tell her to roll and tell me what happens

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>>53135641
I forgot the image.
>MFW

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>>53110395
I swear to dog if any of you fucking assholes ever use "I have a life" as an excuse for not showing up on time I'm got to pop a vessel.

Ignoring the fact that you think so little of me that my own time has absolutely no value in your eyes, have you even thought for a second how stupid and shitty that sounds? This is a weekly rpg session on the same day at the same time every week, this is about as trivial as it gets. How the fuck do YOU have a life. How the actual fuck do you manage to maintain the dumpster fire that is your social obligations if you're not even responsible enough to handle THIS. Fuck you.

>>53133703
You feel good because of your empathy. The same way you feel bad if you hurt someone. "Good" is only an egocentric point of view. A psychopath thinks everything that rewards him is good because he can only feel himself. People with empathy base their morality on communautary standards.

>have player with autism
>Asberger friend
>Slowly start hating him for it because it's so fucking rude to do when I'm talking to people
>Rude in other ways too
>Hates how other people have fun
>Tells people horrible things but then when someone makes a joke at his expense he acts like a thin skinned bitch
>Tries to be group leader and fails at all levels of it because he's as charismatic as a box of aborted fetuses
>When people don't listen to his leadership he starts bitching about respect
>Calls other people idiots in front of NPCs
>Fucks up social encounters
>Refuses to attack in combat sometimes because he doesn't want to get attacked
>Fails in all ways to see error or his ways
>If someone calls him out he just calls the person a shitter
>Talks about how shitty one campaign is during another campaign to make everyone mad
>Is a complete failure as a DM in almost all of his attempts
>Makes other players not want to show up
>Can't kick him because one of the core players is his childhood friend
>Decide to get my shit revenge
>Fuck him over ever chance I get as a DM and cover my tracks
>Make sure he gets critted the most
>NPCs start out hating him because of rumors of him being a total asshole
It's great, I've even learned to feed off of his suffering

>>53130339
Holy shit this. I swear to god, whenever i play with people older than 40, theyre rule lawyer cunts. Theyre the kind of people to bitch and Moan over other people bitching and moaning.

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I fucking love non-normative, custom, and homebrewed races.

I love how much a well-placed custom race can add to a setting it's tailored to. I love the unique abilities a custom race can have that make it stand out amongst the regular pack. I love it when players have a custom race in mind that really lets them personalize their character in a way they're really passionate about or interested in. I like seeing really weird, off-the-wall creatures turned into fleshed out characters. I love the freedom and the creativity and I love seeing smart people go farther than just "people of varying height with ears of varying pointiness."

Obviously this is all within reason (absurd, setting-clashing races or ones with busted balance are yuck) but I'm always afraid to talk about my love of custom races because I know it's looked down upon as the hallmark of Those Guys, snowflakes, and difficult players everywhere.