Awful TT Experiences

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>>53104536
Sidenote: I've been playing RPGs since I was 15. I regularly GM for GURPS (my favorite system). I have never endured a more insufferable, confusing process than making a character in Pathfinder. It's the most obnoxious bullshit I've ever seen in my life. I digress.

>start making my character
>genuinely amazed at the sheer number of options available for a character
>"wow, the character creation process is so versatile!"
>only other version of D&D I've ever played is 5e
>impressed by the granularity of the skills list
>recognize that DCs are much higher here
>+15 seems to be the minimum to be somewhat effective
>intelligence boosts skill ranks available
>pick vigilante as class and boost INT as high as possible
>want to be kind of a medeival superspy type, a little like pic related
>choose half elf to get INT to 20
>11 ranks at 1st level
>feel pretty awesome
>have to dump all my other stats to get that, but my social skills are great
>find out later that the fucking GM explained skill ranks wrong to me, but whatever (told me that each rank in a favored skill gives 3, when it's only the 1st rank)
>finish my character
>not great at combat, but killer social skills
>GM also gives each player one wish
>not sure what I really want
>STR 7
>wish for bag of infinite holding that also lets me grab random useful items from other dimensions

>>53104536
>"cool, we're using pathfinder. It's a homebrew setting with some custom race and classes that I designed. Also, it's an evil campaign, so no good aligned characters are allowed."


Red flag right there. Ya should've known better.

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>>53104575
>miss first session, but hear about it later
>one player apparently intimidated a pair of guards so badly that they shat themselves and ran into the woods
>bunch of other retarded shit
>everyone seemed to really like it
>feeling in the pit of my stomach, but already here so fuck it
>GM introduces my character
>other players are:
>human rogue. His wish was for a rock that teleports. >basically works as a once a session instakill by teleporting it into their skull
>probably does other stuff, is apparently sentient
>fire nymph wizard, a homebrewed race with its own broken shit
>not sure what this guy's wish was
>has a power where he can expend 'Evil' to make his spells even MORE powerful
>gets a custom spell list as part of his race
>final player is a druid
>is also a custom race
>"unicornkin"
>gets healing and a bunch of other shit
>apparently integral to the story
>whatever

>>53104592
I concur.
That should be an euphemism lf "I have a new pair of Martens, would you be kind of let me kick you balls for try them

>>53104592
By my count at least 4 red flags, plus the fact that he'd never DMed before, but like I said I was excited to get a chance to actually play, and I found them out kind of gradually, so it was pretty easy to convince myself maybe things would be OK

>>53104594
>we start the session
>goddess ressurected us to investigate why the gods can't intervene in this world
>literally gives us no information about what's going on or what we're looking for
>fucking around begins
>druid and rogue sneak into a slave camp
>me and fire nymph hang around outside because we have no ranks in stealth
>camp is full of Jews
>literally, a bunch of Jews in fantasy land
>no idea why
>group of robots catch D&R
>attack us
>Dm says "sorry guys, you're just going to have to lose this fight"
>doesn't matter what we roll, robots kick our asses
>kidnap me and fire nymph even though we were completely uninvolved in any of it
>regretting joining this game
>robots kidnap us, take us somewhere else where we're put on trial
>finally get to use my character's abilities
>roll pretty well
>GM just kind of lets me dictate whatever I want to happen
>we're dropped off back where we were, and the robots give us some gold
>I never even asked for the gold

>we go into a tavern to find out what the deal is with this place
>the bartender is a khajiit
>actually called khajiit
>they come from the land of sandboxia
>I'm getting really close to done with this game
>gives us a quest to go collect somebody's skull that he took as a trophy years ago
>whatever

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>>53104594
>we journey North to sandboxia to track the person down
>get attacked by dingos on the way, which are apparently not like Earth dingos because they only survive via cannibalism
>one left
>wizard shoot fire through me to hit the dingo
>3 HP left
>druid refuses to heal me because he doesn't want to waste a spellslot
>we go into a cave
>as we descend everything begins repeating
>stuck in an infinite loop
>repeatedly pass a curious stone altar on the ground with pressure plates labelled 'A' 'X' 'B', 'Start', etc.
>there's a sequence on the ceiling
>out of boredom and curiosity, press the start button
>everyone except me and the rogue freezes in time (me because I pressed it, rogue because of backstory fuckery)
>rogue takes the opportunity to piss on the other PCs while they're frozen
>lame
>once everyone stops laughing from the HI-larious hijinks that. Ensued, we get on with it
>enter the konami code to continue
>everyone at the table thinks it's really clever
>eventually get out of the cave and reach sandboxia
>vast desert land
>suddenly, ground rumbles
>the sand erupts and gigantic, stinky, brown worm attacks
>belches gobs of shit
>my character does best to contribute
>still haven't been healed
>worm hits me
>insta gibbed
And That's the story of how I learned to never let anyone else be GM

>>53104536
Maybe not the worst, but the freshest in my memory.

My buddy and I rolled two sisters for a new campaign. Session 1 we get class levels by raiding a caravan for food, because our town is destitute and taxed into oblivion by cruel overlord. We return we find out that our little sister shows some signs of being sexually abused (getting class levels allowed us to notice this all of a sudden). Sister and I go "aw hell no" and ask our little sister who's doing the molesting. Surprise-surprise, it's our father and the creepy neighbor taking our little sister to pound town.

At this point buddy and I are like "AW HELL NO," so we confront pops with our new force of arms and demand that he submit himself to the town's justice. That's when we find out that he's level <LOTS> and whoops our asses. We flee, and the next day take our case to the town by calling out his crimes in the square. Townspeople congregate, we find they're unenthusiastic about bringing our father and the creepy neighbor to justice. In fact, they tell us we're silly.

Here we stop and ask the GM: "Hey man, were we off the mark assuming that raping your children, then passing them to neighbors to be raped, is not okay? I mean, unusual moral codes aside, incest is one of those big ones..."

His response is basically: "It's frowned upon, but they see it as mostly his business."

At which point we begin to argue that maybe we would have known that, seeing as how we've lived in Incest-Rape Town our whole lives. But he counters with "Well, it's frowned upon, so you never knew that."

We find out that the incest-raping was part of some elaborate plan to train up our little sister to become some kind of loli-assassin, who would be married off to the evil, taxatious overlord (remember that?) and kill him. Which even in-game sounds like a guy making an elaborate excuse for raping his daughter. Needless to say, we tried to kill our father for his crimes, and we were unceremoniously murdered. Campaign over!

>>53104671
>>53104641
>>53104594
>>53104575
While that does sound like a dogshit game, if the guy was a new GM and the players were new as well, I can say that in the beginning all my shit was pretty cringey.

>>53104575
>>53104594
>>53104641
>>53104671
Sounds funny as fuck, you're just too stuck-up to enjoy some good old-fashioned stupid.

>>53104671
>>53104641
>>53104594
>>53104575
>>53104536
I unironically would gladly play this.
For fun

>>53104912
>>53105170
>>53107889
samefag.

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>>53107940
Tough shit bro

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>>53104641
>>goddess resurrected us to investigate why the gods can't intervene in this world
>god intervenes so you can investigate why she can't resurrect you

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>>53105170
>>53107889
>be shit DM
>know that I can't run a game worth crap
>suddenly
>brilliant idea
>purposefully make the game shit
>other morons cheer me on
>never learn to run a game sorth playing in
>mfw