How do we make vampires cool again?

>>52447775
Make them immortal demigods
Just one, all minions are ether mindcontriledor or brainless monsters. the lord of terror and all darkness. Literal embodiment of evil n'shit going on nigga

A SMART goal is Specific, Measurable, Agreed-upon, Realistic, and Timed.

Congrats OP, you're doomed from the start with the most nonspecific, vague, unagreeable, unrealistic, and unregulated question.

What's a "cool" vampire? What isn't? Why aren't vampires cool now? Are vampires uncool now? When were they cool? Does accuracy to historical myths matter? No one's going to agree on this, and nothing constructive is going to come from this.

>>52447775
Lamprey mouths.

>>52447775
Instead of worrying about what strangers on 4chan who don't even play RPGs think of your setting, just focus on making a cool game that you and your friends enjoy.

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Make them metal.

make them sparkle

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Make them cute little girls!

Lock them in a freezer and throw away the key

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>>52447888
I thought you wanted metal.

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Stop Whining! All I did was cut off your stupid legs! Summon your demons! Transform yourself! Regenerate your legs! Stand up! Pick up your gun and attack me! Do something! The night is still so young, and the real fun is yet to start! Hurry, hurry, hurry, HURRY!!!"

>>52447775
After Twilight?
You need to literally wait entire generation of people now to be done with the fallout it created. On the plus-side, it's already few years, so I guess by 2020 they will be cool again, all by themselves.

>>52448394

I hope the fucker with a top hat on his helmet gets bullied to fuck by the other vampires.

>>52447775
drag them out into the sun

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Introduce more RAPE

Read Masquerade or Requiem. I think White Wolf single handedly saved the idea for me

>>52447775
Parasitic, more The Strain less Interview with the Vampire.

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>>52447775
Vampires have a castle town that they are able to run because they have built in to a hollowed-out mountain, with human thralls or willing workers running the farms in the foothills. They have a burdgeoning trade economy with the Drow, who have learned that they can get valuable goods from vampires in exchange for leftover blood from torture, violent anal sex, and violent anal torture. The vampires themselves aren't strictly evil people, but their methods will disgust most mortals and they are cautious of outsiders for this reason.

For extra spice, make their vampire lord Doctor Doom or Magneto

>>52447775
I don't know what "cool" means, but my preferred vampires are evil, monstrous, and antagonistic. I know ther sexual undercurrent has always been there, but that should add to the horror.

>>52448394
Mounted centaurs? What are they mounted on?

>>52447775
Stop letting girls turn them into a sexual fantasy.

Lower the temperature.

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>>52448951
Taurcents.

>>52448951
It says right there they're riding werewolves. What I don't get is why they didn't just infect the centaurs.

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Drop the muh tragic, misunderstood super-humans shit, and let vampires and werewolves be accursed monsters you are meant to fear and hate, as they once were.

>>52448525
But that'll make them warm

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>>52447775
Oh, are we posting funny meme faces?
Let's make a collage!

>>52447775
by roleplaying them

Psychadelic Castlevania Vampires

>>52447775
>make a list of what you find uncool with vampire
>remove/change those things in your setting
>vampire are now cool
That was hard, and if you mean in general, write a book/make a video game/make a movie with cool vampire that become really popular.

>>52447775
Make them less edgy

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>>52447775
>How do we make vampires cool again?
We have this thread, like, every fucking week, regurgitating the same stale ideas.

In any case, the machines of the common people will topple the vampire borgeoisie. Long live the Party!

>>52447775
By pretending that uncool vampires never existed.

>>52447775
>tg
>being cool

>>52452376
>pretending vampires never existed
how will that help?

I mean if you believe in stupid trends then we should see a resurgence of vampires in the next few years. That whole "vamps are big when there is a republican president. Zombies are big with democrats". Its stupid but fairly accurate and i am getting sick of zombies.

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Lolipires are the future.

If you disagree, you're probably a huge faggot.

The same way you make ANYTHING cool. You do not concern yourself with the concerns of sheep, and lead the pack as a lion.

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>>52452730
The only thing that can save us from the faggotry that are lolipires is the Good Doctor.

Cool is based off opinons

>>52452773
>>52452368
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JUJ2WnUsrzA
AYY

>>52452773
The good doctor a shit. He failed to kill the lolipire in his own series, even. But that's not why he was shit. Doctor a shit because he was wrong. And a monster, as much a monster as the things he fought against. And by becoming a monster he cemented his wrongness.

The lolipire in that series was wrong too, of course, but that's neither here nor there.

>>52452825
Lolipire was more wrong than the Good Doctor, though. She spouted the "we just gotta eat and I want friends, so why don't you roll over and die? ;^)" rhetoric and was surprised when SUDDENLY people didn't want to roll over and die, and when started fighting back, she spouted "you are the real monsters ;(((((" shit.

Sorry, but the Good Doctor was at least consistent in his motivations - a true man of conviction, willing to recognize his former wife for what she was - a predator. Lolipire was not - she was just throwing a tantrum like a fucking immortal manchild she was. And don't even get me started on the faggot monk.
Honestly, the only actually truly Good with big G character in the entire series was the nurse.

>>52453262
The memes have frayed your recollections. The story delivered the fact that humans were monsters, lolipire never said it. And he was not consistent. Hell, lolipire was 'consistent' in that she carried the childish beliefs about shiki/human nature and relations as long as she did. Doctor went from being a normal enough guy to being a hollow sociopathic husk of a man. Real men do not treat others as he treated his wife. His wife was not a predator, she was a frightened, confused tragedy.

Monk might not have been good but he won.

Nurse and the old lady were good guys.

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>no dio
i am disappoint

>>52453395
I'd take a hollow husk of a man who sees the situation for what it is over the immortal manchild that ruined the lives of many people with her delusional outlook any day of my life.

>>52453433
To become less than man is too great a cost, dude. If he really saw what the situation was he would have reached out to the monk and things could have ended differently. Instead, he took the cold and efficient way out. It was barbaric and disgusting, and presented as such.

>>52453482
>he would have reached out to the monk and things could have ended differently
The monk was less than human too by that point. He wagged his tail like a dog to the first person who praised him in the entire village (namely, Sunako). Now, you might say that there could've been another way, but consider the situation Ozaki was in - he was tirelessly trying to cure his patients, and it simply got to him at some point. Meanwhile, both Sunako and the faggot monk enjoyed their sheltered lives without a single actual real worry.

>>52453542
Both human dead-ends but the monk got a waifu for laifu and the doctor got a half-rotten village.

Shiki was a fun read.

>>52453629
>implying selling your humanity for a waifu is better in any way for a respectable human being
Ozaki was a man crushed by his responsibilities and he did what he did because he saw no other way to prevent what happened to his village from happening to other places.
Both monk and Sunako did what they did simply because of fucking boredom and ennui.
If you ask me which I feel more apologetic about, it's a fucking no-brainer.

>>52453690
Selling your humanity for anything takes you out of the running for respectable human being. That's why Doctor McGruesome Wife Torture gets as little sympathy as Monkpire. Just saying the Monk at least gets loli tail out of it.

Make them scary

They're horror characters

I should tense up whenever a vampire interacts with a human

>>52447775
Make them bloated disease spreading corpse monsters like they were in many of the original myths and legends about them.

Do it like Salem's Lot

Vampires are a plague that breeds wherever evil and degeneracy can be found

>>52453825
Let's agree to disagree. A man sells his soul to prevent vampire from subverting other villages gets more respect from me than a man who sold his soul for stale vampire pussy.

>>52454123
> A man sells his soul to prevent vampire from subverting other villages
"A man who sold his soul to prevent vampires from subverting other villages", of course.

>>52453825
>How dare you put an unholy abomination against nature out of it's misery?

She would have inevitably gotten hungry and murdered someone. Even the nurse had to tell her coworker to stay back or she'll bite her.

The doctor gave his ex mercy. He saved her soul from eternal damnation. One moment of courage, and it is done.

It is out of the lore and experience of the ancients and of all those who have studied the powers of the UnDead. When they become such, there comes with the change the curse of immortality. They cannot die, but must go on age after age adding new victims and multiplying the evils of the world. For all that die from the preying of the Undead become themselves Undead, and prey on their kind. And so the circle goes on ever widening, like as the ripples from a stone thrown in the water.

>>52454123
>>52454153
Reminds me of how Buddhist soldiers/warriors believe that doing evil against the enemy will certainly damn them to the pits of Naraka for their act but there lies an opportunity to be reborn eventually. They know what they're doing is generating karma, but for the sake of others they choose hell.

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Lolipires are still the way to go desu

>>52454468
There might be something in this, actually.
>mass lolipire pandemic in media
>mainstream becomes disgusted with vampires, moves on to something else
>blank slate for vampires to be dramatically rebooted into something cool

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>>52454508

>>52452700
So the new vampires should be billionaires who prey exclusively on blonde women and turn orange when exposed to direct sunlight?

>>52454508
Actually, I can see lolipires turning mainstream due to the "creepy child" vibe, old vampires normally being seen as a joke halloween thing now and anything like blade that has modern vampires reminding peoplof twilight.

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>>52454468
I agree. Badass lolipires. They are the future.

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I wrote a ton of settings back in high school as a writing exercise, and made a game of each setting having completely different rules for vampirism. Because they all had to include vampires, because I was 15. My writing style has changed a lot since then but it was good practice.

Some examples. Vampires are:

>crazy old rich people who think that drinking the blood of young people will extend their lifespans (it doesn't)
>straight-up bloodplay fetishists with delusions
>a divergent strain of leeches that evolved to be human-shaped, still think like leeches though
>people possessed by parasites like cordyceps to have crazy estrus cycles and crave the sodium and iron content of blood to feed the invader
>the result of a cheap, off-brand style of necromancy that incompetent or poor mages buy (spells were a consumable commodity controlled by corporate wizards like they were soft drinks)
>the second or third stage of evolution from basic undead to liches, like they were pokemon
>larpers who wished really, really hard to be actual vampires
>people from venus who live beneath the cloud layer
>cavemen
>a voluntary genetic modification that became a fad in an age of excess
>a slave race that serve their skeleton overlords
>smokers
>yandere girls
>everybody but they didn't know it (Castlevania fanfiction, alternate end to symphony of the night)

I'm pretty sure I've got more autism stashed somewhere too.

The vampires in the firefall novels are really cool. Super intelligent apex predators from the Pleistocene era.

Necroscope

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>>52447775
They're mosquito people, or at least the Annophelic strain are.
"Vampire" is a catch-all folklore term for a bunch of different blood-suckers with different origins and different rules

>>52447775
WHFB

>>52447775
With liquid nitrogen.
The only way cooler then that is with liquid helium.

>>52448674
If there's an underdark, why aren't the vampires living in it?

>>52448674
Why is both the sex and torture anal? Not that I mind but it raises questions.

>>52456116
They're allergic to edgieness.

>>52456239
Maybe they mean forcibly feeding them spicy food and castor oil?

>>52456282
They're vampires, edginess is the lifeblood that sustains them.

Also, living somewhere where you'll die instantly if you step outside your house half the time is way edgier than living in a giant cave system.

Vampires aren't just a type of undead, there are many kinds of vampires all with purportedly different origins.

For example, Drow vampires believe that being embraced is the Kiss of Lolth. They turn into spiders, control spiders, and their mist form is poisonous. If it were up to me, instead of mist they become a dissipating swarm of tiny spiders just to really fuck with my players.

>>52456300
Your anus is WEAK. and also castor oil makes you puke Skippy. Other end

>>52456324
Noone said those vampires die to sunlight.
Remember that Stoker's Dracula walked under the sun freely, he just had no superpowers during the day.

After a great calamity, almost all the humans in the world are dead, leaving more vampires than humans. There are a few independent human settlements, but most live on farms run by the more successful vampires. The majority of vampires have gone mad from hunger and wander aimlessly in search of the dwindling number of free humans hiding in the wilderness.

Eventually civilization will either re-form around the human farms, or the last of the humans will die and the vampires will have to just suck it up or kill themselves.

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>>52456434

>>52456369
Bonus points if they can bite people and make spiders burst out of them

>>52456369
Plot twist: they're actually of the same nature and origin, but their abilities are shaped by their own beliefs.

>>52454993
>Make vampires great again
>Slave race

>>52447775
Turn them into cum pires.

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>>52456686
Fuck forgot pic.

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>>52447775

Use vampire counts

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>>52447841
I LIKE IT

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>>52447775
every vampire that isn't an undead a shit. a shiiiiiiittttttttt

>>52456116
They have to live where their food is found, humans don't thrive in caves.

>>52456902
>Drow, Gnomes, and Dwarves.

>>52456943
Maybe human blood is healthier or more nutritive.
Or hell, maybe vampires can only drink the blood of their original species.

>>52457009
Maybe tgey are just petty enough to risk their life to drink out of sweet sweet humans.

>>52457028
That vitamin D man, blood just doesn't taste right without it

>>52456384
It's unclear how many of Dracula's powers are from being a vampire and how many are from being a wizard

>>52447775
I'm brewing up a setting based off georgian london but with fantasy races (think fallen london meets shadowrrun) and the vampires, being most, part of the aristocracy they keep themselves as hedonistic celebrities to entertain the proles. Imagine a bunch of bloodsucking kardashians and people compete ata chance to becoma a thrall or "blood donor" and get some of that good unlife that can brush off.

>>52447841

Well this comment renders the comment directly above it objectively false.

>vampire terrorists
>>52438077

>>52457028
underdark is a form of risking your life, too.

>>52447775
-first things first strip them of all the other traits and just keep vampirism as a consistent factor
-don't just restrict them to humans, there are vampires of every race
-remove weaknesses, add new weaknesses, don't let any of those weaknesses be known
-they are not immortal or unkillable they are just very clever, murderous, and mysterious so that by the time you are onto them being a vampire they've already turned you into a bloodless corpse
-taking from the inter-species part there is no standard look for a vampire, they can be anyone or even anything
-they can be nobility but there is no "big aristocratic vampire families"
-they generally act like stalkers, sexual predators, and serial killers

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I think the vampire monsters in MYFAROG are a good example of vampires that are neither a Bram Stoker reboot or contrived edginess (probably because they're based on pre-Stoker folklore). Huldas are women that were lured into the underworld and turned into abominations by Hel as her revenge for having to rule over a world of death and darkness, who have been stripped of their souls (which move on to be judged) leaving only their shadows (the dark parts of one's spirit that aren't reincarnated). Huldas have an additional blood-based stamina pool they need to replenish to keep from fading away. Huldas "steal" the beauty and life force of those they drink from, so they can only replenish blood points from those with positive Cha, proportional to the modifier, and cause those they drink from to age one month per feeding. Huldas are extremely beautiful and appear as light elves to those they seduce, who have to match an extremely high fortitude roll to resist their allure if they come within eyesight of a Hulda. If a female is allured thrice under the same moon, she becomes ill and dies in D6 days of the third feeding, later rising as a Hulda under the other Hulda's control. If the same happens to a male he turns into a wight and ceases to be playable. Huldas lose all favor with Deities, and all sorcery ability that doesn't have Earth as its element. Once a Hulda is killed its body turns to earth, its mind is sent to join its soul, and its shadow is sent to Hel and destroyed. I've been spending way too long trying to find a screencap from /x/, where some guy tells a story about how his SE European great grandpa fell in love with a corpse during WWI that would stand up and embrace him with its stiff arms whenever he would be lured into its graveyard, and he'd claim afterwards that he had spent the night with a beautiful woman, but I couldn't find it. If you know the one I'm talking about, it's a good example of the sort of folklore vampires MYFAROG's Huldas are based on.

I remember a thread a couple days ago where someone was complaining that vampire noble houses don't make sense because vampires are immortal and don't reproduce, which I was thinking about before I saw this thread. I had an idea that vampires aren't actually immortal, they're just in a sort of walking suspended animation that slows their ageing down two or three-fold (maybe it's some sort of slowed cell division or cooling of body temperature and metabolism, if you're the kind of faggot that ruined walking voodoo corpses with "lol it's a supervirus"). Of course, this means vampires will eventually die, so when their time is coming closer they bite someone to be their heir and "descendent," replacing their human blood with the vampire blood to be passed down. Before the vampire dies it spends the last couple years of its life "raising its child" into vampire culture and ways. This way vampire houses actually have a sort of familial descent, and their "ancestors" who bit the guy who bit the guy who bit the guy who bit them aren't around and seemingly the same age as them. There could also be more or less noble lines of descent, with many just being commoner bloodlines. If a vampire could only bite one or two people at the end of their lives, and being staked or whatever was a real possibility, trying to keep their bloodline alive could be a big concern and motivation for vampire culture.

>>52452773
It doesn't matter. The Good Doctor has to pay.

Step 1: Act cool
Step 2: Impale a few hundred people on stakes
(optional: fake your own death)
Step 3: Wait a hundred years or so

there you have OP, there are about 100 different ways you can spin vampires that people think are cool. Just because the pop culture image is bodice ripper it doesn't mean every other depiction stopped existing.

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>>52447841
>>52448255
>>52448394
Can someone combine those please.
Cute little vampire girls with lamprey mouths doing cute and metal things.

>>52447775
Contrast noble dignity with with an inescapable, bloodthirsty addiction.

>>52461951
This. Everyone in this thread needs to watch Dracula Untold, that movie got it so right.

>>52461919
Literally Shalltear Bloodfallen

>>52447775

Make them subtle.

>they drink blood, but don't have fangs
>they're pale, but not dead
>they're longer-living, but not immortal
>they're sensitive to sunlight, but not instantly destroyed by it
>they're good manipulators, but not outright hypnotists
>they have an affiliation with wolves and bats, but they can't transform
>they're only slightly stronger and faster than humans, but not super powered
>they're the result of a blood-based parasite, but not one that's too ridiculous
>their shadows seem slightly off, but they can't move them independently
>they're aristocratic, but not gothic and obsessed with leather

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Vampires are gay.

Wizards are better.

>>52462570
So they're bankers and businessmen, but with enhanced strength and pet dogs.

>>52462638

Yup. And they rule shit.

>>52462650
Gives me an excuse to vent my desire to kill bankers and businessmen in a medium where it will be celebrated (as it ought to be in real life).

Thank you, anon.

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>>52454993
>crazy old rich people who think that drinking the blood of young people will extend their lifespans (it doesn't)

https://www.newscientist.com/article/2112829-blood-from-human-teens-rejuvenates-body-and-brains-of-old-mice/

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The Vampire itself is a cool guy.
Keep sunlight weakness and blood drinking, make them have to hold back their instincts-they are calm and collected, but the second they get angry, they get super fucking angry.
Idk, just not faggy emoVampires

>>52461919
Shalltear Bloodfallen. She is a little girl vamoire (that isnt so quuen of her child body), she has an huge pool of fetishes (the main being necrophilia) and booms her powers by not only sucking, but magically draining peoople blood. Her actual form is actually a mini ghoul with a lamprey mouth. It's not a pretty sigh. Sadly she is from overlord, it might not be your cup of tea. Luckily you might find her rpg stats somewhere, if I remenber she is a level 100 mob.

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The only good vampire is a dead vampire!

>>52462685
Well vampirism is a stand in for the insufferable ruling class sucking the working class dry

Anyone have vampire character art to share?

>>52463596
Blood and Iron

>>52448394
gay as fuck

>>52463596
BLUT UND EISEN

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>>52463596
BLOOD AND IRON

>>52447838
your stupid meme is already mutating

https://www.google.com/search?q=SMART+goals&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8

>>52447775
Easy.
Have nobody use them for 20 years.

Suddenly they'll go back into fashion instead of being overused, cliched, bland and boring pieces of shit.

>>52447775
Vampires embody rape, so instead of making them seductive, make them predatory.

>>52470046
>barbed penis

>>52470127
>spiked vagina

>>52468902
Seriously anon, read it, It knows its edgy and gay and evsrything, and it doesn't tale otself seriously. Also, the artwork is gorgeous.

>>52454294
Yeah, pretty much.
I mean, Doc's evil is selfless - he tortured and sacrificed his only wife in order to save other people. Sunako's evil, however is selfish, a complete opposite of Doc's - she sacrificed other people for her personal whims, and so is faggot monk's evil - he abandoned his humanity and helped Sunako escape simply for his own self-satisfaction.
This is what makes Doc a more interesting and a more respectable character, in my opinion. If you want a comparison, remember Powderkeg of Justice story that circulated on /tg/ in the past and 1d4chan in the present - falling isn't something to be afraid or ashamed of if it's done for the sake of others.

>>52470192
And I'm typing from a cell phone with one hand, so excuse me.

>>52470185
Blade 3 was a steaming pile of shit but parker posey was hot as fuck.

>>52447775
In your games, avoid anything based on tweenage girl fiction vampires and (most) anime vampires.
Stick to the vampires you actually like.
Avoid anything cutesier or cuddlier than Spike.
Use things from this list:
>Sunlight burns vampires.
>They live forever and eat people.
>Vampires have a demon spirit instead of a soul, so while they may have human memories, they don't have human feelings.
>Vampires are harmed by running water.
>Vampires are harmed by wooden stakes.
>Vampires are unable to enter a home uninvited.
>Vampires revel in being vampires, they don't angstily pout over it and pine to be human again.
Watch/read/play a few of these:
>Fright Night (Colin Farrell)
>Tzimisce/Lasombra/Gangrel clanbooks for VtM
>Dark ages "Road" books for VtM.
>Legacy of Kain
>*Maybe* Queen of the Damned/Vampire Lestat, they're on the whiny side, but not like twilight.
>Underworld lacks the angst, but it's just a gang warfare movie franchise with vampires. Still though. They've got the structure and trappings down.
>The Lost Boys

Anybody else have suggested "cool" vampire media?

>>52470185
>>52470324
I'm pretty sure that was meant to be figurative.

>>52453482
He didn't really have any actual choice in the matter. He couldn't cure them no matter how hard he tried, and when they inevitably died and rose, they would prey on other people and continue the bloody cycle. Sunako had expressed the desire from the very beginning to turn everyone in the village into vampires by force, making them experience hell all throughout the process, and then being forced to rise and slave away for the vampire upperclass. Even leaving the village wouldn't help, as it was already stated that there was a city branch that along with the others, would inevitably hunt down and find any strays. We even see that the process isn't even all that likely to occur in some people, and there is a good chance that many people's families won't rise as vampires. Ozaki really had no choice in the matter. It was either sit back, and let the vampires slowly poison and kill the village, or take action and start putting the unnatural horrors back to rest in order to protect the rest. There was no middle ground, especially with Sunako and her servants not even bothering to try and come to an agreement. Both were fucked up yes, but Sunako was wayyyyyy worse than Ozaki in that regard.

Lots of people base their vampires off bats but I think they would be cooler if they were made to be more spider like.

Walking on walls is what spiders do not bats anyway and flying has been removed from most modern vampire lore. Bats are weak swarm creatures. Spiders are freaky monsters that trap/lure victims in to their home and tie them up for later consumption. They're also prone to eating weaker spiders but aren't against working together as neighbours.

Spiders are also more diverse as a species. We've got

There are fast ones that chase prey.

Jumping ones that pounce on their victims.

Ones that hide underground and grab you once you have unsuspectingly walked up to their front door.

Spitting spiders spew a sticky web that traps prey.

Some mimic the smell of female insects to attract males in to their web.

They're pretty cool. There are even species of spiders that have evolved specifically to eat other spiders, they pretend to be insects caught by a web and bite first once the unsuspectingly hunter closes in.

>>52447775
Vampires aren't cool because they suck. Simple as that.