ITT: Try to piss off /tg/.

I left the semen marks on ALL of your elder models.

>>52053282
In truth, the "OMG COASTERS" business has always been lame and gay, and I feel ashamed whenever newfags try to pretend anyone except the biggest faggots tried to push that as a meme.

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>>52053282

>>52053282
>-4 Str

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>>52053415

>>52053282

> 4 > 3 > BECMI > AD&D > 5

>>52053359
The coasters obsession is lame but there's a real underlying kernel of truth. Fucking up somebody's table because you're too lazy to sit your glass on a coaster is pretty shitty.

Why are threads like this allowed? I want lefty redditors to fucking leave /tg/

>>52053282

I'm having fun!

>>52053282

Pathfinder is a great system.

>>52053282
Okay.

Hey guys. I'm rolling up a new toon. Can I get some help?

>>52053449
If you move the first two to the end, I agree with this.

>>52053282
Woman adventurers are unrealistic in a medieval fantasy setting.

It's what my character would do

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We're looking for a new GM because our old one had to quit for personal reasons. We absolutely want to play at minimum 20th level. Your job as GM will be to create an interesting world with believable NPCs, interesting set pieces and challenging dungeons. We would prefer a homebrew setting with kitsunes and other anime inspired custom races, but if you want to run it in Golarion (tm), that's fine too. You have to be able to take in input from our side, we will tell you what we want and when we want it, don't worry ;)
Pic related is our favourite supplement, that we absolutely want to see in action.

>>52053282
>You all meet in a tavern
>You see in the corner a young man in studded leather chatting animatedly with an older woman in heavy armour.
>An old man wearing a ragged cloak over equally ragged clothes nurses a cooling cup of coffee while watching their antics, stirring in a spoonful of sugar after a exploratory taste.
>A man with dark skin pays for his meal with several unfamiliar coins, before brushing past you on his way out the door. He wears a vest made of soft leather over a loose cotton shirt, a short sword in its sheath across his back, held by a series of leather straps and small metal rungs.
>A young girl greets you animatedly, and asks if any of you were interested in buying some of the potato and rabbit stew that is currently cooking, or if you'd like rooms for the night.

>>52053415
He said piss off /tg/, not piss off feminists.

>>52053609
>20th level
Instant nope.

Meatbread tastes like shit.
Dwarf Fortress is worse than shit.

>>52053632
What am I supposed to be seeing here

>>52053475
See, I was thinking of trying something like this, but I was cocerned that i wouldnt be able to craft my bait well enough. What we need is a anon wiling to craft a page long, infiriating script that is also elegent in its simplisity. Something that is garanteed to drive even the sanist of all anons into a froothing rage. Something that will leve them reading far logner than necesary due ot a lack of content, but which has to ned somewhere. We need an exert wordsmith and a bodrerline socipath. The hero we need must be... [spoler]a master baiter.[/spoler] ;)

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>>52053716
>Dwarf Fortress is worse than shit.

You have a female Dwarf and a female Elf.

The dwarf is a hot shortstack, the elf is pure cheesecake.

The Dwarf loves Pathfinder, the Elf prefers 5e.

The Elf wants quests back on the board, the Dwarf is glad to see them gone.

The Dwarf enjoys generals, the Elf says they killed creativity on the board.

The Dwarf is tolerably Progressive. The Elf posts on /pol/... and means it.

The Dwarf believes all the memes about GURPS. The Elf is willing to give it a try.

The Elf is an Ultrasmurf fan. The Dwarf likes the Magpies. However, the Dwarf plays Orks and the Elf plays Tau. Both like the look of Tyranids though.

The Elf plays Blue-Black, the Dwarf Black-Green.

The Elf likes Cultist-Chan. The Dwarf hates the All Guardsmen Party stories.

The Dwarf wants to experiment with Monstergirl sexplay... possibly to the extent of furryism. The Elf is into pegging and urethral sounding.

The Dwarf enjoys JoJo. The Elf thought Kill La Kill was an instant classic.

Both thought Boku No Pico was adorable.

The Dwarf insists on playing the rogue if possible. The Elf always makes paladins.

The Elf is the one posting the Varg threads.

The Dwarf posts Lindybeige threads because she thinks they lead to interesting discussion.

The Elf couldn't care less about the new season of Samurai Jack. The Dwarf thought Firefly was just ok.

You have to pick one to date for the next six months. No, you can't kill both. Or yourself.

>>52053899
Dwarf

>>52053359
It actually IS terrible though. OP's picture? That is actually disgusting.

>>52053899
Let's hope the dwarf has a steady source of lava to drown in.

>>52053899
Well, you beat me. I tip my figurative hat.

>>52053952
>>52053932
One of you has Shit Taste.

It's unrealistic for wizards to be balanced with fighters.

>>52053525
>>52053573
>>52053415
fuck you guys

>>52053899
Dwarf, but I won't play Pathfinder with her.

>>52053899
So basically, the Elf is perfect in every way and the Dwarf is shit?

>>52053359
But it's the kind of shit that makes me loathe to take the antique table my grandmother wants to give to one of the grandkids. I'd love to use it as a gaming table, but I don't want to be having a panic attack every time I bring someone over and they have snacks. I could cover it up, but it's a beautiful table - if you get it for the looks, what's the point of never seeing it?

>>52053768
Actual traditional games

>>52053988
>Tau Player
>Liked Kill La Kill
>Plays Asshole colors.
>questfag

Whelp, you failed.

>>52053768
>>52054030
Wait I got
>cliche start
>woman in heavy armor
>coffee
>sugar
>dark skin
>sword worn across back
>potatoes

>>52053632
You fucker, this is like that thing where two guys with swords pass each other and then the other guy takes five steps before he splits in half.

>>52053899
Wow.
I guess elf, they're at least kind of cute in a "wow they are really retarded how do they even remember to breathe" kind of way.

>>52054008
Put tempered glass on top of it?

>>52054053
>this is like that thing where two guys with swords pass each other and then the other guy takes five steps before he splits in half.
Bleach?

>>52054069
Literally any Japanese anything made in the past 50 years

Skub, yes or no?

>>52054062
Enjoy having your anus and urethra torn apart by a retard.

I'm gonna play a CN Kender rogue.

>>52053899
You win. Fuck you.

>>52053282
Jim Profit and LogicNinja and VirtualOptim and Sergal posting and Flare posting really addd to the character of the board, and all of them should be brought back and made janitors?

>>52053899

Date the Elf.

>>52054048
There's also
>studded leather
>unfamiliar coins
>cotton
>rooms for the night

>>52054069
No thanks, you go ahead

>>52053899
dwarf anyone choosing elf is shitter

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>...and this is what my character looks like!

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>>52053899
>The Dwarf hates the All Guardsmen Party stories
10/10 you got me anon

>>52053899
>The Elf is the one posting the Varg threads.
elf is wife tier

>>52054117
>>52054162

See: >>52054130

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>>52053899
Is there a limit on how drunk I can be the entire relationship?

>>52054184
Drunk but not to the point of death.

>>52054106
Go die in a flaming acid bath.

By the way, who brought the Cheetos and Mountain Dew?

>>52053899
Literally only downside to dwarf is a love of PF and a memetastic distaste for GURPS. She's miles better than pure faryan /pol/ack.

>>52054162
>>52054174

You need to get shot.
This thread was bad, but you guys seem intent on turning it into a "let's pay attention to shit best left ignored"

>>52054217
The elf, then. The dwarf will take my constant alcoholism as a sign of approval. The elf will be disgusted and want nothing to do with me for being a filthy fucking degenerate. Especially if I drink ouzo, or fermented mares milk, or something. No urethral sounding for me!

Plus, with boku-no-pico, and the elf wanting to try gurps, I can probably combine the two and my brain *should* explode in protest at being exposed to that sort of horror.

>>52053899
ROUND TWO

The Elf thinks Steven Universe is the best cartoon currently airing. The Dwarf says the same about Adventure Time.

The Elf likes Big Bang Theory. The Dwarf hates Rick and Morty.

The Elf always smells of cigarettes. The Dwarf is frequently stoned.

The Elf thinks Wyverns should count as Dragons. The Dwarf thinks she can fix Chakats.

Both don't see what the big deal is about kender, or airplane food.

Both of them would've thought that was funny.

The Dwarf tells the WORST puns imaginable. The Elf Thinks fart jokes are only funny when she tells them.

Both have very strong opposing opinions about Tolkien and Harry Potter. Freebie on this one, you get to choose.

One thinks Douglas Adams was better than Terry Pratchett. You only find out which one after you make a decision.

The Elf only uses GameScience Dice. The Dwarf believes all Dice Gods superstition and is super uptight about letting others touch her dice.

Same rules apply before, except now both are strapped to a trolley problem. The question now becomes who would you rather date, and who would you rather see dead?

Communism is wrong.

>>52054438
Reddit is that way, friendo.

>>52054393
>Can't kill yourself.
Try making the elf want to kill you instead.

>>52054427
>>52053899
Fuck you. Well done.

>>52053566
>Woman adventurers are unrealistic in a medieval fantasy setting
>fantasy
If you were talking about an actual historical setting you'd have a point, how do people generally handle that? Do female players just have to genderswap or have a permanently gimped character?

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>>52054427
You win, anon. I think I'd rather smuggle drugs into thailand with a picture of their king taped to my boots than date either of them for six months or kill one and leave the other alive.

>>52054427
I'd rather see them both dead and continue to faithfully date my left hand.

"Pathfinder is a bad game."

>>52054479
No multi-track drifting.

I'll make a chaotic stupid loner whose selfish decisions are all defended by " It's what my character would do!"

>>52053899
Dwarf for three reasons
>My anus/ urethra will remain safe
>I can share my ambivalence of firefly with her
>I find Lindy threads enjoyably annoying

Other than that they're both hot memetastic weebs. I don't see this lasting beyond six months.

>>52054444
/tg/ are the most easily baited board on this whole website, by far.

>>52053899
Dwarf, because I don't need to agree with her on every little thing for me to want to date her, and we agree on enough (or at least have perpendicular enough interests) and she's cute enough that I'll enjoy the six months that I'm finally not alone.

>>52054427
WHERE IS THE DAMN LAVA!
NO BRAKES = AUTOMATIC CRASH.

>>52054512
"Communism is bad"? Really?

I'd say /tg/ falls for the bait harder, but actual baiting tends to be a bit harder.

>>52054549
>"Communism is bad"? Really?
It worked didn't it?

>but actual baiting tends to be a bit harder.
Nah, I've seen people get baited accidentally which doesn't even make sense.

>>52054512
You don't go to /k/ much, do you?

>>52053386

This has reached a point where it could piss people off not because of the man himself any more, but only from people who take 1d4chan as gospel.

>>52054580
How easily baited are they?

>>52054444

>4chan is communist

How can you get four fours and still be retarded. What a waste.

>>52053282
One of your players wants to bring his girlfriend for just one game and asks you to create her an appropriate character. She arrives and the only thing she knows about the game is that she absolutely hates the character you created for her.

She stays for the entire session frequently saying things like "What the fuck am I supposed to do?" every time her turn comes up. The boyfriend makes excuses on her behalf saying "At least she's willing to play," and other things to mask the fact that he is completely embarrassed and emasculated.

>>52054505
>>52054427
Sticking with Dwarf, Elf get TROLLEY'D. Also dwarf has some hot opinions that might be interesting to listen too. It'll be a long six months.

>>52054608
That's kind of the point. Reddit is turning into a commie shithole. 4chan? Why the fuck would you troll about communism on 4chan? That's like trolling about ancaps anywhere.

>>52054427

>Wyverns

>Loves Tolkien

>Hates potterfaggotry

She's perfect

>>52054597

Not as easily as the white bread wet towels on this board

>>52054597
At any given time, half the threads on page one are pure bait.

>>52054629

Art thou a fellow goldiblack flagman of nonagressives and the freebydowants?

>>52054597
Springfield Armory 1911 or Glock 17 Gen 4

>>52054656
Do /out/ ever have threads about what kind of bait to use when fishing, a bait thread if you will.

>>52053899
Hardmode: They're friends that will take eachother to whatever game you're in or running. They cannot be separated. They talk about you all the time. Whoever you don't pick will stalk the fuck out of you.


INTRODUCING DLC CHARACTER:

Male dragonborn.
He is into fitness and weightlifting.
He will play tabletop but only half assedly and will generally play CN rogues.
He doesn't play anything other than 3.5 and demands to use all the splat books.
He plays on his cellphone when it's not his turn.
He never brings snacks.
He has a fursona and will talk to you about it autistically.
He prefers "classic" anime like ghost in the shell and will not watch anything popular.

True Demon Hard Mode:
He unironically browses /mu/ and /lit/ and shares their views.

>>52054427
>elf likes big bang theory
>Elf likes fart jokes
Regardless of my opinion on >>52053899
which still means dwarf is kind of better I want elf Dead.
They're both kind of shitty, though.

>>52054659
Damn straight. Want to go shoot some of neighbour's escaped child slaves?

>>52054666
Yes, it is actually a general.

>>52053984

It's possible, it just requires old-school conventions like high lethality and varying XP curves, along with additional restrictions on advancement for wizards.

Having a PHD in restructuring reality is obviously stronger than having a PHD in sword-fighting, but the latter should take much less time.

It also makes no sense that a wizard can develop his skills to such an insane level just by camping in the woods and putting kobolds to sleep.

Wizards should have major storyline-level requirements to advance past certain thresholds. Like....

1-6 - Hedge wizard: Run of the mill murderhobo, knows some spells only really useful for adventuring, doesn't do research, can spend his whole life doing this and never progress past that

7-12 Mage: Wizard has to settle down and attend some kind of organized learning institution to reach this point (he can do that at any level, but he can never get to level 7 without doing it)

13-17 High Mage: This wizard has transcended his training and can teach his own institution if he wants to. A high mage that deigns to murderhobo will completely outclass his mundane peers but why would he bother? A wizard has to do something to contribute to the world of magical academia equivalent to a graduate thesis, generally requiring collaboration between player and DM to figure out a suitable story arc for it.

18+ Archmage: At this point the wizard can do pretty much anything and as such most have transcended human concerns entirely. Reaching this level requires serious consideration by the DM, should take discoveries or deeds of global impact.

-------

But that's all really complicated and just gives arcane classes even more cool shit while fighters languish.

The real answer to the mage problem is to play Ars Magica.

>contributan

I like quests a lot, especially ones with sexy kobolds and le epic memes

>>52053899

>The Elf is into pegging

I choose the elf.

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>>52054427
>>52053899
I made a thing no one will thank me for and will likely be passed around filename threads for the next few weeks.

>create an NPC that is distinct and vital to the story
>have the PCs frequently talk to and about him
>Near the end of the campaign he does something very significant like become the BBEG or sacrifice himself for the party's sake.
>One player pipes up
"So who is this guy supposed to be again?"

>>52054629
>Why the fuck would you troll about communism on 4chan?
Because it works? There was a thread the other day someone started about using communists as villains and the first response was some moron bitching about the thread and how everyone should sage it, and that post was just the first one like that.

>>52054670
Don't you mean...
He has a humansona and is a reverse otherkin. He is just as annoyingly delusional as otherkin saying shit like "Fuck you I'm a Human Bean.

>>52053632

>Metal rungs over the back.

This must be uncomfortable. Maybe it's his 10ft ladder?

>>52054134
that has a penis doesn't it

>>52054726
Wait the PCs didn't kill him the first chance they got? I call bull.

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>>52054727
I have legitimately never seen a genuine communist thread on /tg/. Huh. even one like that.

>>52054597
Just use clips interchangeably with magazines or say one ww2 tank was better than another. You'll be sure to get some replies. It'll start with some funposting then go to shit. You could replace the first bit of my post with something /tg/ related and have it be equally true. But I just treat all shitposting on this website as non-serious, I have neither the time nor care to check the belief of some anon.

>>52054703
Enjoy getting fucked by a Tau Player.

>>52054760
I've seen /tg/ take bait that wasn't even intended as bait, that's how easily baited they are.

>>52053899
>No, you can't kill both. Or yourself.

YOU AICK TWISTED BASTARD!

...

unless you a lady, then I love you.

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>>52054705

>>52054727
Just use "Stalin did nothing wrong" Marxist-Leninists as villains and basically nobody will complain besides MaoistRebelNews and similar jackoffs.

HERE COMES A NEW CHALLENGER!

Kobold, but you'll forever be forced to watch shitty anime and BBT. Eventually you'll have to take care of like fourty or fifty kob-lets when she gets preggo.

Wyvern: Guaranteed affectionate but unfortunately she's also a fucking huge ass wyvern and might crush your junk when she lays down on you. Oh yeah, you're also bottom bitch forever.

Wyrm (Or asia noodle): Neverending story! Except youve developed some extreme premature syndrome, and you can't even go for more than a minute. It will talk a lot of shit to you, but at least it's loyal enough to cuddle.

Dragon: Cons - It might fucking eat you. Pros - You might be into that. Bitchin wealth though, and you might get to go do some awesome rampaging or sky soaring before then.

Dragonborn: Bro as fuck, will play all the games with you, but will put your ass on a fitness regiment until you're swole as fuck. Keeps teasing you about being fat, and will secretly try to fuck over your weight regiment with junkfood because he's into making you get strong, but he's also into you getting big.

Mimic: ITS A TRAP! ... but it can take whatever shape you want it to be, and it wants the d. cons: sticky ass shit all the goddamn time mimic what the hell are you doing?

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>>52053899
>>52054427
>pegging, sounding and cigarettes
Literally the only things stopping me from picking elf outright, but holy shit are those giant deal breakers.

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>>52054786
Either dragonborn or mimic

>>52054786
Man, I fail to see the problem with dragonborn. I like to eat, I already have to exercise like a motherfucker to keep my weight down. I'll go gay for something like that, no problems.

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>ITT: Try to piss off /tg/.

I'm for/against quest threads

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>>52054427

but.... but you reversed it!

>>52054786
Bro... now it's just getting silly. This is basically the TowerGirls generation someone created specifically so we could hatefuck it. Even if you win, you lose.

Elf and Dwarf are really all we need. One's am elf, the other's a Dwarf, and already I'm favoring one of them. The rest is just careful balance of things /tg/ hates to actually make it a difficult choice.

Multiple months into the game
>"so what do I roll to attack again?"
>"how much damage do I do?"
>"oh wow, I've been doing this all wrong, can you help me fix my character sheet?"
>"I slit his throat/Achilles tendon/ect." "What do you mean I have to roll to attack and for damage!"
>Gets hit once, "5 damage? I'm ~sooo~ scared". Gets hit again for the same amount of damage, "wow, now I'm at half health I guess the GM is trying to kill me or something."

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>>52053899
>>52054427
>Likes BBT
>Cigarettes
>Sounding/pegging
>/pol/ack
vs
>Short as fuck
>Drug use
>PF

>>52054850
Filthy Skubfag.

>>52054850
u dun it now

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>>52053359

Get a real job and buy real, quality furniture (Read: not IKEA shit) and you'll about strangle the fucker who can't fucking use a goddamn coaster.

>>52054779
>"Stalin did nothing wrong" Marxist-Leninists
So actual communists? College students larping as revolutionaries aren't real communists kid, they're just morons (slight difference).

>>52054427
Does anyone have the multi-track drifting pic?

>>52054836
Way too late bro. Elf is Pro-quest, Dwarf is Anti. Anon really ripped us a new one with this, and >>52054705 just made it worse by making it spreadable.

>>52054885
Nice addition to the thread, comrade.

>>52054886
See: >>52054775

>>52054853
>Gets hit once, "5 damage? I'm ~sooo~ scared". Gets hit again for the same amount of damage, "wow, now I'm at half health I guess the GM is trying to kill me or something."

This is me, basically all the time. I'm sorry, I can't help it, particularly when I feel in an adversarial mood that day.

>>52054900
Shit.
What if I destroy the house/apartment that we'd be staying at, so that we're forced to live outside in the winter and die of exposure? Does that count?

I want to talk about Myfarog. I'm totally going to post a scan. Later.

>>52054933
That one no longer works.
https://mega.nz/#!b9AyCbgb!4MBEciB5_0mpmvQ0KKif96pz9gdCDtvbo9-WiH3NiyU

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>>52054735
When I saw pic related a while back I saved it because it caused me physical pain. I know there's way worse shut out there, but I look at this shit and I say, "How the fuck does someone honestly end up like this?". It makes for interesting thought experiments to figure out how to effectively and ethically manage to help someone who's this far gone.

....or you could take the mystery box

>>52053282
THIS IS MY FUCKING HOUSE

THOSE ARE MY FUCKING GLASSES

THATS MY FUCKING TABLE

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WILL POST PROOF IN THE MORNIN WHEN I FIGURE OUT WHO IN MY FAMILY FUCKING LURKS 4CHAN

>>52055056
I did it. Me, your cat

>>52055056
OP here. I just Google image searched "ring on table from not using coaster."

The image is from this page:

http://www.thriftyfun.com/Removing-Water-Marks-from-Wood-Furniture-1.html

>>52055087
why is there a picture of my table on the intenet?

if you look into the reflection you will see the bay window that is attached to our living room

>>52053899

i usually pick Elf Gals, since i look like an Elf myself...however,

i am so doing the Dwarf. we just don't play DnD, we watch Samurai Jack and i introduce her to new shit i like, and we Wargame like mad on our gamedays.

>>52054705
Dwarf is objectively the best.
Quests are for faggots.

>>52054427
>>52055150 me

>Stoner Dwarf
and i will end the relationship by hate fucking the elf in front of the Dwarf once...i can run faster than that dwarf can try an catch up to over 30 minutes....

still, i liked that Dwarf until she had dogshit breath. i cannot stand pot-smell.

>>52055126

I don't know how to tell you this, so I'll just come out and say it.

Have you considered you may be living inside a stock image?

>>52054705
Dwarf, just for the puns

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>>52053899
Elf. Elves can't win against the cock anyways, and a mindbroken elf is easy to bend out of habits and preferences that go against mine.

>>52055338
This nigga gets it

>>52053609
Okay, yeah, this one got me..... FFFFFFUCK YOU!!!!!

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>>52053899
>>52054786

new contenders are shit: here ya go

>Gnoll Female,

>Thick Hispanic accent
>she's /tg/ because it complements her /k/ and /x/ leanings.
>spends time outdoors
>dem hips

>she has a dice collection she calls "shiny"
>she prefers homebrew and almost conceptual games
>hates CATastrophe, will play OSR
>"what's GW?" ..."oh, those guys. fuckign jews"
>Magic deck is 15 years old and hashed together almost at random: Red-Green-Artifact?
>would rather Tarot. she has some Heresy Kingdom Cards
>you are afraid to show her a living card game for the same rreason as above and below...
>loves being a bastard at Catan and RISK, etc...
>won't play wargames, but mini paints like a fucking machine

>barely watches TV
>horror and foreign films mostly
>endless taste in music, mostly indie and metal.

>occasionally sniffs paint.
>alcoholic
>no sense of fashion taste or social nicety
>abhors fat, she's skinny as fuck.
>seemingly random IQ.
>she loves to cook, and brews her own mead.

...

>as likely to use the demi-penis as she is to take yours
>virginity long gone
>pays no heed to chad, but accepts fedora company
>she has the best bedroom voice and dialogue.

...

>owns a confederate flag for some reason....

>the moment you choose her, everyone will peg you for a fucking furry.

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>>52054646
Go away, shitskin. Your kind isn't welcome here.

EZ PZ
https://youtu.be/m3p_VuPIS2c

>>52053609
holy shit dude. that's some high quality bait

What's that one spell....Mordicanon's Disjunction?

>>52055635
Is this loss?

>>52054438

I think your confused. The point is to say something that will make us angry, not make reasonable statements.

>>52053609
I've only played once and this still seemed downright stupid.

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>>52053282

>>52055786
fake

>>52053899
Damn it, I pick elf. But I'm not getting pegged or whatever the fuck "urethral sounding" is

>>52055841
You ever wanted to get penetrated through your dickhole? no, well too bad. Six months of forced dating is more than enough to coerce you into that and getting pegged.

>>52054786
Dragonborn easily.

I'd go gay for 6 months for that.

>>52053899
Literally EVERYTHING about the Dwarf is perfect, except for her being progressive. I'd take her for 6 months, and keep her for 6 more.

>>52054427
That dwarf is actually alright, seems like a standard issue normalfag. The elf is just every 4chan stereotype rolled into one.

>>52054427
>>52055968

I still think the Dwarf is perfect, except for her being stoned

>>52054681
My main point was actually that there is no "realistic" version of wizards so it's arbitrary what magic is and is not capable of. Magic doesn't NEED to be so easy and powerful.

>>52054119
anyone mind explaining these four?

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I'm glad WHFB was killed off, it was old and turgid for a long time and the setting was going nowhere.

Space Wolves have the best lore of all time in 40k.

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If the Emperor had a Tex-to-Speech Device is a good series

>>52053899
Dwarf all the way. Why would anyone choose otherwise? For other reason than not liking shortstacks of course.

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>>52056082
It is tho.

>>52056082
>>52056109
It is, but it's the Robot Chicken of 40k lore. It's good because it's a parody, and manages to be somewhat clever at times while still being funny and knowing its audience.

It's just that, like all things on /tg/, people take it way too seriously. Sometimes things are good precisely because they can be a little dumb sometimes.

>>52054597
They're up there, but if you really want to b8 people, the top three boards to b8 on are

>/pol/
>[r9k]
>/v/

Hell, just make a "Fembot feel thread" on [r9k] and it's hundreds of free (you)'s.

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>>52056131
Latest episodes haven't really been funny though. Just spouting memes and random things while expecting people to laugh

(all of these are from the SAME player, and sadly, he IS real...)
2 years into the campaign:
"What dice do I roll again?"
"can I borrow some dice?"
"Can I borrow a book, I need to look up my abilities"
"according to the latest errata on the web page that I just brought up, I should be rolling 12d8 not 12d6... (checking the address bar, which is carefully hidden, shows that this is a page on his harddrive)"

>>52055968
It says she's tolerably progressive - she probably won't get on some pedestal and rant at you. You can probably survive for six months without politics getting in the way if you have so many other shared interests and likes.

>>52056131
I don't think it's even funny. The humor is really weak, and mostly relies on you agreeing with the Emperor as some sort of mouthpiece for the fandom, and enjoying laughing at things from this meta perspective of 'oh this is how things should be, you idiots,' instead of having the series actually show you how things are stupid, and then letting you appreciate how stupid they are and laugh at it. The series is not really open to anyone interpreting it in any other way.

It works if you are a part of that narrow range, but for anyone else it's going to miss and fail horribly. No one likes to be told 'you should agree with me,' and personally I hate the idea of being pressured to agree with someone else's opinion, that is probably based on a bunch of 1d4chan articles and someone else's meta humor.

>>52053359
It's not a meme. Stop ruining tables you fag

>>52054427
ROUND THREE

The Elf thinks Darkness is the best girl. The Dwarf, Megumin.

The Elf Carefully Balances her characters between being too fetishy, Sue, or Edgy. The Dwarf frequently spills over into one of these categories, but usually has enough character development that it's passable by the end.

The Elf's first character was a Dual-Wielding Ranger. The Dwarf's was a Happy-go-lucky bard with an abusive history.

The Dwarf Likes InCase. The Elf reads ShindoL for the plot.

The Elf prefers d20 over Dicepool, the Dwarf Vice versa.

The Elf knows a cute half-orc she might invite to a threesome. The Dwarf knows a Kitsune.

They both use coasters, however the Dwarf prefers square coasters, the Elf round ones.

The Dwarf thinks Dragon Quest overall had better games than Final Fantasy, but she insists VII was the best one in that series. The Elf likes VI, but would rather play Chronos Trigger.

The Elf owns Bad Dragon merchandise. The Dwarf rents all her sex toys.

Both Have a Fetlife account.

The Dwarf Lives pays rent to live in the basement of her parent's rather large house. The Elf Rents out of a decent apartment with thin walls.

The Elf likes Dwarf Fortress more than the Dwarf does.

The Dwarf is incredibly chatty, but the elf is a little to quiet at times.

The Dwarf Refuses to let you pat her head. Poking the Elf's nose is off-limits.

The Elf is a bit of a health food snob. The Dwarf suffers from cheeto-fingers far too often.

The Elf plays Assassin or Tank. The Dwarf does Support or CC.

>>52056310
>All of this is biased towards an elf
Fuck off.

>>52056310
>Elf
>Smoker
>Health food snob
These two don't go together.

>>52056354
>Implying Darkness is Better than Megumin

Shit Taste.

>>52056339
I bad joke, but I don't see what's supposed to piss me off. This feels more like a /co/ thing.

>>52056388
>An elf that admits masochism is best is better than a shortstack that likes flat chests and quickshots
You have the shit taste here, friend.

>>52056310
The dwarf gets better and better with each part. Elf is a real, 100% cunt, while dwarf is described like a normal person with few flaws, most extreme being a stoner...

Well, besides that half-orc for a threesome... ungh...

>>52056486
>Rents Sex toys.

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>>52056310

>>52054958
Holy shit, dude. I didn't think it'd ever happen.

>>52056498
She won't need them anymore.

>>52053282

I don't get all the hate for the Big Bang Theory. It's like any other US-produced sitcom with a laugh track that came after Friends: you don't watch it, you leave it on as background noise. At least the acting and pacing is passable unlike, say, Two Broke Girls, which somehow remains popular despite having even less entertainment value.

>>52056040
Anachronistic concepts.

>>52053359
Oh look a lovingly maintained 200 year old table. But the coaster is all the way over there. Netter be an inconsiderate lazy slob rather than make the effort of reaching a whole 3 inches.

Nah. It's super discourteous and you are shit for excusing it.

>>52056671
Just tell the person to use coasters? If they refuse or ignore you, forbid them from putting drinks on the table. If they still ignore you, just kick the disrespectful cunt out of your playing group... If it's not your table, shut the fuck up.

>>52053359
I've never understood why this was such a huge sticking point. When you're in someone else's house, and you're using their property, you follow their rules. This is basic social etiquette; the kind of thing you'd teach children.

But apparently basic social niceties are too much to ask of the denizens of /tg/. Which says a lot, now I think about it.

>>52053899
Elf has some minor drawbacks, but otherwise she is perfect. Date the Elf, of course.

>>52054040
And Dwarf likes /generals/, it's a catch 22 since you cannot win.

>>52056310
>The Elf reads ShindoL for the plot
literally mah nigga

>>52054119
>No thanks, you go ahead

Milton Berle-tier underrated post.

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>>52053282
i sure hope no one here plays ranger.

>>52056354
The elf likes BBT.
She needs all the help she can get to make it even close to equal.

>>52057299
I guess I don't have to be in the same room if she watches it? It's a pretty heavy detractor, yeah.
The main things would be
>how much is "into" sounding
>would elf play a skullclamp deck
>Is she good at playing paladins
That would make up for the /pol/ and BBT.
the rest are pretty good, DESU

>>52056400

Delphyne is a Gorgon so she comes up in /tg/ now and then.

The usual thing that sparks rage here when it's posted is the use of Japanese steel.

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>>52053282
>ITT: Try to piss off /tg/.
okay

>>52053282
The Riptide is perfectly balanced, and there's nothing wrong with bringing a riptide Wing.

>>52056802
>>52056671
For the love of all that is good, stop being faggots. It's not a question of how important coasters are, it's about you faggots pretending it's worth bringing up and arguing about like it's a point of contention. It's a poor man's skub.

You already know this. You pretend otherwise, because that's the game. That's what makes this whole thing lame and stupid.

>>52054850
Why would that piss off /tg/? Skub is great.

>>52057830
IKEA pleb detected.

Either that or slob

>>52057875
For the love of all that is good, stop being a faggot. It's not a question of how important coasters are, it's about you pretending it's worth bringing up and arguing about like it's a point of contention. It's a poor man's skub.

You already know this. You pretend otherwise, because that's the game. That's what makes this whole thing lame and stupid.

>>52054008
>Gaming table doesn't have a glass or acrylic top with a 1 inch grid underneath, allowing you to draw maps on it with wet erase markers.
Found your problem.

>>52053282
Why would you use a nice wooden table for gaming?

Use a large cheap Walmart table if you're being cheap, otherwise use a table that's actually good for gaming, with a glass or acrylic top and a gaming grid underneath, or one that looks like terrain.

For extra points, large LED screen underneath.

>>52057894
IKEA pleb detected.

Either that or slob

>>52057950
>He uses nice wooden tables for gaming.
But why though?

They're shitty for gaming in terms of size, they're easily damaged, and they don't have any extra gaming features, like built in terrain or grids or a screen or anything.

As far as gaming is concerned, a $25 Walmart table is better than your fancy oak dining table.

>>52054427

Wait, the elf believes /pol/'s ideology, but likes Steven Universe?

I think you dun goofed

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Catgirls, not anthropomorphic catfolk but a human with girl with cat ears and a tail.

>>52054679

Yes please!

>>52057188
>that fucking pic
I CAN'T!

>>52056547
Holy shit they are both awful there is no way in hell I would put up with either of their shit, no choice because there is no way in hell I am dealing with cigarette or pot smell for 6 fucking months ... wait I can't kill myself instead!? I take the third option.

>>52057188
Arrow on the wrong side of the bow, fuck anon you got me.

>>52058639
Now look at the rest of the pic. Look at how the bowstring is, and how she's holding the bow.

>>52055056
But this looks like a floor, not a table.

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>>52057188

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>>52058286
>wait I can't kill myself instead!? I take the third option.
What made you think you could do that?
This IS the other place

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>>52058863
This is not a floor its my table

this is an old pic with all my 40k models on it, notice the seem down the middle of my pic and the seem horizontaly on the op pic, its a place were the table can extend out and become bigger. in my picture the table is already extended.

how did my table become a stock image?

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Post a model which is objectively better designed that these. Protip: you can't.

>>52055010
From what I know about real bashit-insane rabidly SJ-obsessed otherkin your pic looks like a troll.

>>52056160
>"according to the latest errata on the web page that I just brought up, I should be rolling 12d8 not 12d6... (checking the address bar, which is carefully hidden, shows that this is a page on his harddrive)"

Hahaha, holy shit. I'd kick someone out for that, or at least put them in my . Being clueless is one thing, you can make the guy some reminders and set them down under his nose every session to mitigate the problem. But once you prove yourself a cheating bastard the trust is broken and you're not getting invited back.

>>52059003
*or at least put them on my shitlist (or be wary from then on at least).

>>52058990
look i love AOS but the back of these things, spicifically their butts and those pouldrons look silly.

>>52056027
>>52056310
I still don't see anything major wrong with the Dwarf.

You're not making this a hard choice, anon.

>>52053609
Not gonna lie, I'd do it for money. I've been a paid GM before, and all those things are totally reasonable to me. I have a nice pile 'o adventure modules for ridiculously high level play, and a bunch of minis I have never had the opportunity to use because they are for things like the tarrasque and ancient colossal red dragons and whatnot.

>>52053282
One thing that really pisses me off is stories about players who get fucked over by their DMs. As a DM myself, that shit makes me furious.

>>52047816 This entire thread for example.

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>>52056160
>"according to the latest errata on the web page that I just brought up, I should be rolling 12d8 not 12d6... (checking the address bar, which is carefully hidden, shows that this is a page on his harddrive)"

>>52058014
There's a /pol/ screencap floating around about how SU is secretly /pol/ with SJW-trappings

the actual point it makes isn't even that /pol/, it's just filtered through a /pol/-point of view. Basically, the female characters are trying to be role-models, but are flawed and Greg seems bumbling but is actually a good dad

>>52053899
>Hating on the AGP
this is an instant dislike

I miss Virt.

>>52054040
Elf is hotter, we only gotta go six months, any other flaws you can work on

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>>52059169
It's not just a filter, it does actually make some good points.

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>>52059257

>>52053282
I like 3.5

>>52055510
>alcoholic
>racist
>abhors fat
honey i'm home

>>52054427
I still say elf, but if she hates Pratchett I'd feel a lot better about having her sent to Dubai in a shipping container

medieval armor and weaponry that sacrifices the slightest amount of functionality because it looks cool

>>52059269
Dwelf-guy really made it hard to post the lazy, easy posts like this. All taken together as the girl you've got to date for the next six months...

>>52055010
The only thing triggering about that image is peanut butter being stored in the fridge. If you take any of the other nonsense written seriously you might have actual autism

>>52059265
My cap is the full thing, senpai.

>>52055644
fuck you. you got me.

>>52059311
Bitch thinks she's a japanese tortoise, it should at the least trigger laughter.

>>52054621
that's why you have several spare characters on hand at any time, because your players are babies and giving them a new sheet for the session is easier than stopping for their tear fest after they try to bluff a fireball.

>rolls out of sight then scoop up the dice announcing i made it

>>52058286
there is no multitrack drifting

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>>52054705

>>52053899
Dwarf. Shame she isn't taller.

>>52059326
4chan has rendered me incapable of believing any of that nonsense is true

>>52053949
>>52054427
>BBT
>Cigarettes
>Fart Jokes
As if I didn't dislike her enough. I'm a pun guy anyways

>>52053794
It really is. At minimum is needs a full overhaul of graphics and gameplay.

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>>52054853
I laugh at my own suffering

>>52057910
>doesn't use the clearly superior hex system

>>52054427
multitrack drifting

A kobold only ERP game in a pathfinder setting that's magical realmed all to hell.

>>52053899
>>52054427
If there is no multitrack drifting, I choose to save the dwarf.

>>52059611
>A kobold only game in a pathfinder setting.
Brevity is the soul of wit, anon.

>>52054666
/out/ is comfy. The people who bait threads all have identifiable themes.
The guy who says he'll shoot your dog if it is of leash.
The stability guy in trekking pole discussions.
Anything pro rainbow gathering.
The guy who goes to the batoning threads to shit talk

>>52054853

This

This cuts too close to home...

>>52056354
>BBT
>SU
>Smoking
>Urethral Sounding

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>>52057188
Jesus Christ how horrifying.

>>52055010
The thing that upsets me is the use of an Asterix after a word but nothing later specifying what they mean by it

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>>52055080

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>>52053282
"d20 is the greatest system ever and D&D is totally balanced"

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>>52053609
just slowly breathe.... and count to ten

>>52059972
>when a shapeshiter decker tries to steal your pay-data.

>>52053632
>studded leather armor

>>52053899
As long as neither one fields Female Space Marines, I'm good.

>>52053609
I see nothing wrong with this

>>52057830
I second this.

>>52054079
...Yotsubato?

>>52055338
>mindbroken
OH PELOR JUST LOOK AT THE TIME
IT'S SMITE TIIIME

>>52057188
>The head wouldn't go through a wool coat.
>Arrow on won't side
>whatever the hell she's doing with her hand so that she drops the bite when loosing the arrow
>that fucking draw string
To funny

>>52054427
Dwarf it is

>>52053632
Oh I see
This supposed to trigger people that think
>medieval fantasy=100% real life europe

>>52054786
Forget the dwarf, I want Dragonborn to make me into a Wammuu

>>52057861
skublr is that way

I unironically belive Dreadball is better than Blood Bowl

>>52055510
won't date, but would hang out with

>>52053359
>>52053468 >>52053949 >>52054008 >>52054873 >>52056254 >>52056671 >>52056802

Aaaand we have a winner, and a new /tg/ rule: USE THE DAMN COASTER.

>>52059959
As far as I can tell, the asterisk is meant as a wildcard, like you'd use in a search. The point is to cover the words "trans", "transsexual", "transgender", and "transgendered". Some people throw massive shifit when they see someone else use the Wrong Word, so it's become a tumblr trend to to simply say "trans*" to mean "interpret this how you will".

tl;dr a result of tumblr idiocy instead of an example

>>52061827
>new

>>52056310
>incase
You just made this easy. Dorf gril best gril.

>>52053282
>[literally, absolutely anything]

>>52061841
Is be fine with that but at least put that at the bottom

[Something something something trans* something something something something

*interpret this how you will]

>>52053949
Disgusting is a bit much. Unless my life is a lie thats just water having soaked into the wood and messing with the stain.

Think my grand dad's method of fixing it was just sanding the table once a year and staining it again.

>>52054705
Multitrack drifting

>>52061827
>new
How very appropriate for your post.

Somebody post the Scroll of Reveal Janitor.

>>52061979
fuck you, your waifu is fake.

>>52056253
What , did you watch only few first episodes?

>>52057800
Sunder builds

Players who need "hints" should be penalized experience for the session

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>>52062071

>>52062006
Again, the asterisk here is not intended as a footnote marker, but as a wildcard character. If you don't know what that is, look it up.

>>52056050
>>52056082
These are facts

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>>52055510
>hates CATastrophe

So on a dare I'm rolling up a crossover game between 40k, SU and everyone's favorite miniature equines

>>52054853
>the poor saps who have to play with DSP in a tabletop
"WOOOW HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT GETTING HIT CAUSED YOU TO TAKE DAMAGE?! FUCKIN' BROKEN PIECE OF SHIT!"

>>52059169
>>52059257
>>52059265

Aren't the Crystal Gems *and* Greg bumbling but ultimately decent parents?

>>52062527
The Gems almost killed Steven though, Greg actually saved Steven, Rarely mind you, But he did.

>>52053899
Dwarf. Might have a couple points we disagree on but nothing major. Might talk her into adding some harsher kinks too.

>>52062527
The crystal gems are at their core fundimentially good people, this does not make them good parents, a common thread in their species has been extreme difficulties I'm handling change to the accepted status quo, they have a very sedentary mindset, making them hard pressed for handling the dynamic mindset of organics

In a social challenge, if you only need a player's intent and method before they're allowed to roll diplomacy, then you're retarded.
It's ROLE playing, not ROLL playing. Players should say their character's actual lines like they're in drama class, that's the only way to do it right, no matter the group

>>52062626
>The Crystal Gems almost killed Steven though, Greg too

You kind of proved my point?

>>52054444
Eat shit and die, you fucking Bolshevik faggot. Reddit sucks marx's cock harder than most places online. Communism is never okay.

>>52062918
I think what he meant is that saying "communism is wrong" would work as bait on Reddit where everyone is a marxist, but not on /tg/ where folks aren't quite so retarded.

Agree with everything else you said, though.

>>52062891
No, Greg did not attempt to kill Steven if I remember correctly, In any way shape or form.
The Gems however...

>>52063076
Unless you count that whole Warp Whistle thing, although that was more just annoying him while he was trying to figure out how to defuse a bomb

>>52063101
Who broke his leg?
She started it.

Although yeah, It was silly.

>>52059711
I already covered half of that. Elf, not like she's gonna get cancer, just , and I like the smell of cigarettes, doesn't say anything about smoking them around you, and SU is alright

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>>52059711
>>Urethral Sounding

>>52061827
Like that post said, you guys are some really dumb and unfunny newfags.

>Now I KNOW you said no splatbooks, BUT....

>>52063076
Pearl is the only one who has *attempted to kill* Steven. Greg and the other Crystal Gems have only ever threatened his life indirectly, through negligence or ignorance.

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>>52053282

>>52054586
Yea the memery about him is far more obnoxious than him about at this point
>lel spiritual leige XD

Ban opal.

>>52053609
>tfw I wrote (part of) that pasta.

>halfsword and mordhau were the result of a gigantic conspiracy to trick people into thinking they're real for lulz, I know because I'm a mongoloid that plays with sticks

You babies need to stop whining about 'rules'.
When a player says they want to do something, they should be able to do it if they roll high enough. After all, rolling a 20 is a rare enough event that it's an instant success in combat, why not have it be an instant success out of combat?
Besides, the fighter/wizard power dissonance can easily be solved by looking for homebrew on the D&D wiki.

Nobody gives a shit about how D&D used the names of things like kobolds, bugbears, and hobgoblins, to mean different things than in folklore, and if you're playing D&D, those terms mean what they are published as in D&D, not what they mean in folklore.

Kobolds are dragon worshipping baby eating lizard people. That's not factually incorrect, that's context dependently correct.

>>52056050
I was about to lose my shit but then i remembered what thread I'm in. 9/10