Talking to your dice

>>51845416

Why do you always spite me on the important rolls you son of a bitch? You best start rolling right or I'm going to go and get dice who will, and you can say good bye to your comfy case and regular cleanings.

>>51845416
"I wish you existed."

>>51845416
you watched me melt your brother and sisters in the oven, do you really think i'm not gonna do the same to you? your choice is simple, be on my side or become a pile of molten plastic on a cookie tray while your brother and sisters watch from a chair.

IT WAS A TWO PLUS REROLLABLE SAVE YOU FUCK!

>>51845416
"did you have to fuck [friends spouse] so damn hard tonight? what the fuck dude(s)?!!"

>>51845416
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
[incomprehensible sobbing]

Apologise.

>>51845416
"I used this hand to masturbate."

fffffffFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK YOOOOOU

>to my d20
"What the fuck, bro? We just finished a four hour session and the highest number you rolled was a 10."

>to my d12
"I'm sorry I never use you. I promise I'll play a barbarian in the next campaign."

>to my d4
"You are awesome. Keep rolling those 3s and 4s and we'll show these fucks what the smallest die can do."

You've always done right by me, friends.