That guy thread

Why not just break his legs in order to give him greater challenges? That sounds pretty in character by the standards set forth

Retaliate. You're a wizard and you're NOT gonna fireball the ass of whoever killed your family?

>>51417048

Color Spray, Ray of Enfeeblement, Feeblemind, Baleful Polymorph... you're a Wizard. Make him not a threat.

>>51417095

He hasn't killed anyone yet,he just told me and he was damn serious about it, I could kill him but I don't want to fuck this game up.

I want to try convincing him and that fucking DM that doing so is totally retarded and will only fuck everything

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>Every time one player needs information from an NPC, their actions devolve into horrific and graphic torture

>>51417953
>I could kill him but I don't want to fuck this game up.

Anon. It's already retarded. You have That Guy and That DM sniffing the same glue. Kill That Guy, finish the session, then leave.

>>51417048
Could tell the local peacekeepers if the dude is in the same city/town/whatever as your family is, or perhaps hire some people to help protect your family. Or could simply just hope there's a situation where you're the only one who can save his life and don't.

>>51417048
Clearly, all of you are that guy
Which mean that none of you are, congratulations you have a functionning group

>>51417048
Not really that great one but it happened yesterday.
>friends and I got to Adventure's League games at LGS so we can all play together
>usually enough for all of us
>usually only one or two other people but they're really chill
>DM's also cool
>show up a bit late
>table's damn near full
>don't recognize half the people
>the new people consist of an old man,hambeast and scrawny dude
>I heard hambeast's intro and he's a female tabaxi rogue
>scrawny dude is sitting next to me he's an elf wizard named 'the Professor'
>playing the game find out old man is a human monk
>didn't mind them
>thought it couldn't be too painful
>made a paladin and decided to chill with my buddy who's a ranger
>spend most of them game of just talking in character with him
>the Professor kept leaning over to me
>I'd look back and he'd stop
>hambeast has his rogue speak in a horrible russian accent
>the Professor asks to make investigation checks
>one of the regulars(we'll call him Josh) finds out plenty of information with his arcana check
>Josh tells the rest of the party
>Professor asks to make an investigation check on it
>finally get around to combat in the session
>party's getting jumped by halflings and human
>some of are bloodied but we're more or less murdering these fuckers
>the Professor goes down
>Josh uses spare the dying on the Professor so he's stabilized
>He asks if he can do anything now
>GM explains he's still unconscious since he's at 0 hp but he's stabilized. He'll wake up when someone can heal him
>bad guys turn again, one them hits the unconscious Professor since he was the closest one to them
>GM says that it counts as one fail on a death save
>Professor starts putting his dice away and stands up
>"I concede this game."
>everyone's baffled
>Josh being the cleric said he was going to cast cure wounds on him next turn
>"No it's fine, I lost."
>Old man speaks up,"Why? We can heal."
>Professor leaves
>Hambeast looks at him walking, "What a sore fucking loser."

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>>51417048
>That Guy walks in to our session
>invited by last guy
>rolls up a character
>christ the nerve of this guy
>we meet in a tavern
>"I'll have a beer"
>My fists clench and my jaw tightens
>the entire groups laughs ironically
>"Well Al, any news lately?"
>I cringe and bite my tongue while our DM obliges him with a cheapass plothook
>The rest of the party nods on like bored zombies preparing themselves for the worst campaign of their lives
>pathetic 'smiles' grace their dull lips
>this continues for 2 agonizing hours
>"Hey guys, who feels like a pizza? I'll buy."
>my eyes bulge and a small angry squirt escapes from my sphincter
>son of a bitch orders a margarita chicken and a meatlovers
>everybody fawns sarcastically over him while my tongue suffers a lack of pineapple chicken barbecue sweetness which ANY fucking player could tell you is the superior topping combination
>always hangs back in encounters after wearing down bosses and lets the bard finish them for credit
>insists on brief descriptions of downtime activities that round out his lame fucking character (oh look, another Dingo Druid!)
>hosts at his apartment and plays 'mood music' to complement the setting and provides comfortable furniture.
What the hell am I supposed to do about That Guy?

>>51418506
Honorable?
I don't know. Maybe he was really into the roleplay for a sec there. Or he got Call of Cthulu confused in and thought his character ain't got a chance.

>>51418533
He played PF and 3.5.

>>51418527
Wait what. This dude sounds perfectly goo
ooooooh

>>51418506
>>finally get around to combat in the session

Found the problem player. It's you.

>>51418549
Honestly doesn't sound that bad though. Guy just sorta gave up. He didn't screw over anyone or anything like that.
He just left-he conceded. Seems pretty ok.

>>51417953
>don't want to fuck this game up
You don't have to worry about that, he already did

>>51418575
I guess. Dude just seemed kinda weird. He sounded offended when he said conceded. It slowed things down briefly because cleric had to think about what he wanted to do since the dude left.

>>51418639
Yeah, that's just a guy being weird.
Maybe his past experience just involves dying if he goes down, even after revive.
Or perhaps, in an even stranger manner, he wanted to keep you guys on yourselves, rather than worrying about him at which point leaving would provide that.
But idk. Probs past experience or something.

>>51418527
IDK, but I mean pineapple chicken barbecue? Don't know to many people that say that's the best.

>>51418527
I recognize that his is bait, so I will only say you should ironically kill yourself for mentioning pineapple barbecue pizza.

>>51418527
>pineapple chicken barbecue sweetness
It took me til this to realize it was satire.
Who the fuck likes fruit on their pizza?
And pineapples are gross on their own anyways
t. Hawaiian.

>>51418506
I've done that twice before in games where I couldn't bring myself to give a shit about the plot or PCs. Seems nicer than just saying "I don't care what happens anymore" and waking away

>>51417977
Make them fuck up the whole mission when they act on fake information, because the tortured person didn't know anything but had to make it on the spot so they wouldn't kill him.

>>51420294
this but unironically

>>51417048

>That Guy decides that anything he rolls well on, no matter how stupid or ridiculous it is, should be successful
>Whines when it doesn't go his way.
>Purposefully seems to go out of his way to try ridiculous crap to hope for this short of shit.

>>51420988
>players who think that good rolls = instant success
Probably my worst pet peeve

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>>51418527
I know you wrote this as a joke but...
>mfw someone in my group actually does like pineapple chicken BBQ pizza
>and always tries to order it
>and usually doesn't have money to pay for pizza/snacks

>>51417048
>>51417953
You do realize that player is not calling the killing of your family "challenging", but actually getting on the bad side of a (hopefully)powerful wizard, right?

He probably wants to go the Vegeta route in Super, making threats and sounding crazy to induce the wrath of whoever he wants mad. For a "warrior who wants to be the strongest and who's always looking for challenge", that's dickish, but not out-of-character.

My point is, he wants you to retaliate and defend your family, thus giving him a good challenge. After he loses(because come on, you're a wizard), he'll probably go the generic shounen ex-villan-turned-rival and use you as a measuring stick for his improvement. If all that reading is somewhere near truth, you're in for some fun bouts.

>>51417048

To be fair, he wasn't exactly That Guy, just being incredibly dense.

>Low level
>Attack this goblin fort
>Win
>Piling up their crap to sort through it
>It's about 1/3 weapons, 1/3 coins, and 1/3 random crap
>DM at one point while we inspect it describes a stick.
>That Guy keeps asking more and more about the stick.
>DM gets sarcastic about it, saying things like how a knowledge, arcana check determines that it "used to be part of a tree"
>Tone clearly says to drop it
>That Guy wastes maybe 15 minutes trying to figure out if the stick was really a POTENT ARTIFACT OF DOOM instead of the obvious fact that these are a bunch of poor as shit goblins and it's just a fucking stick.

>>51421892
Probably this if he hasn't already gone out of his way to kill any of your family yet.

>>51417048
>"Slaughtering innocent people is challenging"
it kinda is when you're aiming for a high bodycount

>>51421965
At that point you all should've just run with it.
>"DM, my character suddenly feels a strong need to hold the stick!"
>"DM, my god is speaking to me, he's telling me that this is the stick that my ancestors used!"
>DM, we're out of toilet paper. My asshole demands the stick!"

>>51417953
Kill his character, leave the group and then find a better game