How do we fix the Goblin race?

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genocide

>>50863825
Longer lifespan, lower reproductive rate, and more Eberron Goblins.

>>50863825
What's there to fix?
I fucking love most Goblins.

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Kill them all.

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>>50863825
Little bit of stability results in them being less fucktarded, but keeping a vein of ideas so stupid they loop back around into being brilliant.

>>50863825
Hot, human, Dickings.

>>50863825

'Ere gonna need a 'ole lotta gubbins.

>>50863825
Get a lot of veterinarians first.

>>50863825
Stop sexualizing them, dumb ass.

That's how you fix them.

>>50863902
The Asura are pretty fucking stupid. Look at what the Arcane Council did with the information that the Elder Dragons eat magic. They tried to cover it up to the point that they were willing to destroy one of their three main colleges and murder a huge number of their own people to keep it a secret. And why did they do this? Money. Maybe. They didn't actually have a way to profit off of the information at the time, but they figured that there MIGHT be a way to make money off of knowing that the Elder Dragons eat magic. So they started killing and destroying to make sure only they knew that, just in case there was money to be made in the future.

>>50863825
Bigger hips.

>>50863873
But anon, that LN doesn't have enough rape.

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>>50863987
I figured that was partially the inquest running shit because their society is composed entirely of absent-minded genius dipshits, and partially anyone with good intentions on the council buying "Well, we don't want to make EVERYONE panic".
I think their biggest problem is a lack of coherent action, really. One asura can work wonders. Five asura managing to work together for over ten minutes can wreak miracles. Ten or more asura collapses in on itself into a backstabbing pile of uselessness that keeps asking for more funding and repeatedly explodes.
I'm not saying the council isn't retarded, but I am saying a direct and present threat motivates the asura people as a whole much more effectively than an ephemeral one.

Also catcows a best.

>>50863825
What's wrong with them?
You've probably just answered your first question too.

The Socratic method is your friend.

>>50864068
> anyone with good intentions on the council
There aren't any. The fucking Inquest have a seat on the Arcane Council, and the others are all so self-absorbed that they'd do things like intentionally sit back and let an Elder Dragon eat the world unless they're allowed to literally steal inventions from children.

>>50863825
The WoW version?
Don't bother, they're just green gnomes for the Horde.

/TG/ related versions?
Depends on the setting.
What do you find offensive that isn't /v/-spawn?

>>50863987

Well yeah. People think that the asura's theme is SCIENCE! It isn't. Their theme is capitalism. Just listen to the chatter at mount maelstrom, the asura there are talking about the dangers of working on top of an active volcano that's constantly oozing lava (and destroyers).

One of them says that they should probably develop some better heat resistant protective gear for their work. But that gets dismissed because the other asura says that would cost money and it would be cheaper to just get new crew members when their current ones all burn to death.

Their attitude to science is one of ambivalence. They don't actually care about it, they only care about making money. If it would be cheaper to forget all about technology or magic and just throw bodies at the problem, they'll do that.

>>50863825
The same way you fix any filthy animal.

>>50864196
It's funny how the Inquest is almost a universally hostile faction because their science is so morally unbound, even by asura standards.

>>50863825
LITTLE GREEN DICKS

*boo*

GET OUTTA TOWN!


BIG HUMAN COCKS!

*cheering*

>>50864821
> even by asura standards.
It's not like they're separate from the rest of the Asura. Hell, they're a part of the ruling government. If anything, Asura with any scruples are the unusual ones while the Inquest are in the mainstream.

>>50863825

More catchy goblin jams

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9kAEoCHANYY

>>50863825
Make them taller, less retarded, and give them human skin colors instead of green.

>>50863825
females look exactly like males, males are the disgustingly buttugly type, NOT the androgynous type.

>>50865036
>>50863861

so make them not be goblins?

whats wrong with goblins any way?

they are perfect for what they are, scrowny little greenskin humanoids breeding like rats and at the same time cunning and inventive but impulsive and childishly irrational, with a tendency to make magic/technology that routinely blows up in their face and something of a evil streak that you just cant blame them for

the only way you could make it better is if you made it more literal, like if their females actualy had reproductive systems like rats females, if they got born in litters of 5+ and breed in pulses, if their brains actualy functioned as if they were hiperactive autists with borderline & bipolar because concrete neurology, etc

only thing id ad is longer noses, jaws and ears, like whfb style

>>50863825

You can ask the same about literally any version of any race.

A better question would be: What purpose do we have for them? How do we adjust them accordingly, so that they will fulfill it in an ideal manner?

Change the stats. +2 DEX, and -2 WIS or INT in exchange for +2 CHA (passionate little buggers)

Give them a racial trait worth picking.
Have them become mad tinkerers.

>>50863825
What is there to fix other than their lack of presence around my penis

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>>50863825
Goblins are great just the way they are. If I were to change anything, it would be to just give them more natural enemies/predators that kill/eat them on sight.

Make some of them genuinely badass and able to stand up to the other races without crutches such as mad tech, dark magic or black gods' blessings.

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>>50866846

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>>50866770
interracial gene-mixing could be a solution to "improving" goblins

>>50865168
I think he's mostly right, only I would make goblins longer lived, simply that most don't because of external conditions, like Styx, goblins could live for centuries, if they could ever stop being under the thumb of an oppressive society. I imagine the insane deviousness and wickedness is more of a by-product of juvenile behaviour, bad parenting and the constant threat of plated boot storm troopers with maces kicking in your door to assert dominance and "heretics gonna burn"

By not having them. The very idea is a racist idea of lesser human that are brutish with flavors of magical negro/evil vodoo magic sprinkled about but ultimatly they're a lesser person and should be killed under the game systems. It's like trying save that racist merchant depiction of a person of the jewish faith, no matter how much you try and do mental gymnastics you're a moron for trying.

Goblins have instinctive knowledge of how to be good doms, and use tamed humans as mounts.

>>50866910
I'm sure you're open to discussion anon

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>>50866770

The lack of Anon/goblin mating is truly a serious problem.

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>>50866951
Can you think of any reason she puts up with this bullshit other than the orgasms must be mind-blowing?

>>50866889
can confirm goblins in my groups setting have gone from a barbarian race to a civilized one and have a pretty decent demense within the kingdom that could be a nation in its own right

>>50866991
Without magical cop outs nothing about that image really makes sense outside of it just being sex play. Slaves that fight while getting whipped really wouldn't stay completely unscarred for very long

>>50863825

> How do we finish the Goblin Race?
Fixed that for you anon.
And of course the answer is:
with fire and sword!!

>>50863842
Romans weren't really interested in genocide for the most part though.

Goblin Knights

>>50864249
>Don't bother, they're just green gnomes for the Horde.

I'd be more fair to say that gnomes are just white goblins for the Alliance.
At least goblins occasionally get some lore.
Once you level past Gnomer, gnomes are permanently irrelevant.

>>50863825
Don't, they're fine as is.

Make them a minor power. They have their own country with their own goblinbrained government and laws.

>>50867101
Don't think she's getting whipped, I think that's a leash.

>>50863906
>>50864029
>>50864852
>>50866770
>>50866889
These are all I agree with. Shortstacks are a blessing.

>>50867245
Except for goblins, of course.

I mean, you seen any goblins around since the Roman Empire?

>>50868454
why did the romans genocide them

>>50867639
Then again, look what happens to none humans or dwarves in the alliance that get attention, night elves and draenei are just eternal useless punching bags for orcs.

>>50868485
Didn't pay their fucking taxes man.

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>>50863825
By giving them a king.

>>50863825

Make them an all female race that requires human males to reproduce.

>>50868669
Have them believe that the mightier and wealthier a BBEG is, the better his offspring will be, explaining why they would be gleefully willing to join their cause.

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>>50863825
>Serious answer
They don't need fixing, really. A destructive, horde race with little scruples for life. Mix in a liberal amount of insane engineering and you've made me a happy Anon.

>Non-serious answer
Shortstacks are super hot. Make them less disgusting, more civilized, and much more fuckable.

>>50868788
>to defeat the BBEG you have to fight your way through hordes of goblin waifus

Seriously gonna have to roll bard and James Bond through that shit, the PTSD will be too severe the normal way around.

>>50868617
Are you talking of the Dave?

>>50868788

Also makes sense that they would betray him then once you start kicking ass because they see you as a possible mate as well.

>>50869800
>once the party defeats the BBEG, the goblins will demand someone from the party to become the new overlord
>without an overlord, goblins everywhere will go crazy, abducting humanoid males to use as mates
>there must always be an overlord to keep the goblins in check
One of the few moments where the bard's sex prowess becomes vital to the game.

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>>50863825
make goblins silly and have quirks, but still can be serious and even deadly. instead of flat evil or good have them be mislead or ignorant of the world around them (books eat thinks, so burn da books!). having a strange sense of logic for better or for worse is what makes them so fun.

also speaking of goblin kings, i just had an idea for a story
>starscream type guy wants to take over kingdom
>king cursed to be super ugly beyond recondition
>can only be undone through true loves kiss
>but his one true love, the queen, has died long ago from some ailment
>blamed ugly king for killing the king
>runs away into goblin village in the mountains
>think hes a big ol gobbo
>"he da tallest, so he da big boss now!"
>mountains rich with ore and materials
>builds goblin kingdom ground up
>wage war against old kingdom
>too strong head on
>attacks resources, all for revenge
>starscream sends party to kill the "evil" goblin king slayer in his "evil" lair on top of the "evil" mountains
>keikaku intensifies

>>50871580
I've always loved it when non-goblins takes the role of goblin leaders, whether they're humans, orcs, ogres, dragons and whatever, so I approve of your idea.

I guess that means that I prefer goblins as gremlins who don't care if their leader is a non-goblin, it's enough if they're strong, or cunning, or both.

>>50863842
fpfp
/thread

>>50867245
>Romans weren't really interested in genocide for the most part though.

Except if you really manage to piss them off.

>>50872087
Well, even then, mass execution is rather hard to pull off without industrial technology.

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>>50872028
agreed, lovable little underlings are lovable.

>captcha: de jesus viking
>look at pic
that'll do captcha, that'll do

>>50866959
I swear, Incase consistently hits every single fetish I have. It's so nice.

>>50863825
engineer their wombs to bear human children, then turn them into breeding sluts

>>50865018
I'd get in bed with a goblin.

>>50869871
Like a sexual lich king, then?

So what would a half-goblin look like? Is there half elf half goblins?
How do i homebrew a half goblin race?

>>50873101
Yes.

>>50873286
Like half-elves, but green and with delicious birthing hips

>>50868485
I dunno, they rebelled over something, hid in a bunch of forts for like fifteen years, it was shitty.

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>>50872489
>>50872792
>>50872964
>>50873384

>>50863825
I run them in my setting as essentially roaming gypsies who travel from place to place in massive caravans, before setting down a tent city to try and scam their wares.

Lets me keep them slimy, but less full retard. Also lets me run them as oracles or palm/card readers.

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>>50863825
Exterminate them, don't let even the babies alive.

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>>50863825

> "We whack 'em upside da 'ead n' eat 'em! 'Cause dere Tasty!"

>>50874037
but goblins are tiny. that means they have tiny guts. split and incise.

>>50871580
>party gets to his lair
>explains the situation
>he has found true love with one of the goblin women, but knows if his curse is undone he shall be cast out once again
>torn between duty to the goblins and his love.
>feels ensue

>>50874158
goblin lords, champions and heroes are big.

>>50866991
Bondage and electrocution are her fetish.

>>50873286
>How do I homebrew a half-goblin race?

Depends on what game you're running. D&D 3.5 has a canon half-goblin race already, from Dragonlance's "Races of Krynn" sourcebook.

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>>50863825
I work goblins as mechanical people that work off gut instincts, and we play with dragonmech so it works out great. Goblins in my games have +2 wis, -2str and will have the racial ability to change the following skills from int to wisdom - Alchemy, Craft (including mechcraft), Open Lock, Knowlege (Mech, Geography, Architecture), and Bonus Steam Powers. this will be due to a trait called Innate Know How

>>50874200
>has to live a life of bitter vengeance lest his plans fall

love it. was thinking of a koopa kids type of elite group, because midbosses, and a girl or two among them.

>>50872028
This sounds incredibly fun to role play but also could be problematic with getting the goblins to not make a huge mess of everything. I'd be like trying to herd cats.
What could be some sure fire ways to get them to behave without being cruel and edgy.

>>50863825

Remove everything redeemable or personable about goblins. Remove sexual dimorphism. Remove intelligible speech.

The only good goblins these days are fucking grots, man.

The rest are just green gnomes. They even contain the same memes: A love of terrible tinkering, short, busty women, invisible, easily killable men, high populations, insularity(except when it comes to their women apparently, because fetishes), and explosions.

Gnomes and goblins both need to just die.

>>50875338
Have you heard of a game called overlord?

>>50864032
Which LN does have enough rape then?

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>>50863825
We become the goblins.

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>>50875402
This.

>>50875432
Yeah but it has been years since I played it.

>>50875579
We can take inspiration from it. you give them their own quarters that they can fuck up all they want. They are not allowed to mess up the rest of the area, but they have their own containment area. Give them missions to vent their special creativity on. As long as they have an outlet, you have your unfucked castle

>>50875621
Nice but what about on the go can they be trusted to accompany me to go to market?

>>50863825
I prefer my goblins being more like intelligent violent rats that destroy villages and caravans and like rap music a lot.

I don't need green violent humans since niggers and gypsies can be shown openly at the table.

>>50875711
kid harnesses. alternatively have a big or smart one to help manage/babysit the lot.

All these ideas are shit. The reason goblins don't care about lives is because their lives are cheap. The combination of short lives and the accelerated creativity that comes from it is what makes them interesting. Imagine a rail system that is a better engineered product if it kills a couple workers a month for a smidge of cost effectiveness. Making them longer lived, less chaotic, or muh oppressive culture completely removes what makes goblins interesting. Goblins mature in weeks, are working in months, and die in a decade. They are absurdly creative and clever because that is the only way their species can survive living in fucking dungeons, and like the naked mole rat, kamikaze attacks actually increase your chance of genetic immortality.
Stop trying to make them human waifu-fags

>>50875817
This.

Why is it high birth rates are also shit?

Life is devalued. You just go around killing each other and it doesn't matters at all.

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I always really liked the goblins in the now obscure crpg Lionheart. An otherwise poorly done game that had a very interesting game world idea where magic suddenly came to a real life medieval timeline.

In it goblins have taken over/taken the place of the mongol horde. Asiatic swarmers, they use harass tactics and specialize in archery.

The interesting thing about them is that they have the ability to eat brains and gain some semblance of intelligence and transferred skill from the act. Individually goblins are standard dumb and loathsome, but the commanders would have above average intelligence and the khans would be near superhuman geniuses.

I think it hits a lot classic points. Goblins are still weak and come from a land of "rough" civilization. They're still associated with destruction and terror. They are still vaguely evil by their very nature and use tricks more than raw strength to win battles. But there's potential for them to be truly threatening and the big brain leaders insure that goblin civilization is dangerously competitive. It explains why goblin culture is so aggressive since their entire culture is probably built around leveling up themselves from their kills.

>>50875817
well thats like, your opinion man.

i do like goblin slayer because the pure evil dnd side we haven't seen recently, also for the insight as to why they are so deadly. they are many, small, smart(enough), crafty, and know they are underestimated. they adapt to thier suroundings with what little they have and take any advantage they can, even if they have to cover a rusty shank in blood, piss, shit, and poisonous mushrooms. having goblins being a race is one thing, but making just short orcs or green gnomes is missing the. they are annoying little point. they are little annoying shits like gremlins and i love them for it. and best of all they are dirt cheap and come in bulk.

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>>50873582

Years ago, a magical kingdom created goblins to be cannon fodder - fast breeding, fearless, able to eat almost anything, the plan was to just breed them by the dozen and drown their enemies in rancid little balls of violence.

The females are very intelligent though, closer to humans in shape and designed to be able to control the males. They began to question their lot in life, and they turned on their creators, fled the kingdom, and tried to make their own way.

There are two kinds of goblins today - the feral matriarchs who send their children to raid civilization for food, and the free goblin-girls who live in cities, developing their own culture, and using magic to breed with other goblin-girls so that no males can result from the unions.

But no matter how intelligent and educated they are, all goblin-girls are secretly tremendous sluts who love being bred.

>>50875958
High birth rates aren't shit, forgot to mention it.

>>50863825
What's broken?

>>50876032
It would explain why goblin matrons are regularly considered a thing.

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Let the paladins have at them.

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Get them Organized

>>50876032
>The females are very intelligent though
Why?

>>50877050
queen bees

>>50877090
That explains nothing.

>>50877050
He want his slutty waifus

>>50877222
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Queen_bee_(sociology)

>>50877459
I get what you're going for, but only social intelligence among other factors from what I've seen has been cited as a factor. Not just "intelligence" per se.

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>>50877577
goddamnit just let me have my SOFT, SHORT, LIPSTICK-WEARING FUCKPILLOW WAIFUS already faggot.

>>50876032
>Smart, organized matron figures that just want to be bred good and deep.
N-nice...

>>50877659
PERFECTLY REASON OUT YOUR SEXUAL FANTASIES OR GET THE FUCK OFF MY BOARD, NORMIE

>>50877697
>saying normie
What are you a fucking normalfag?

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>>50877577
for consensual sex in the missionary position for the sole purpose of recreation and hand holding

>>50877741

Which is secretly the end result of said goblin seducing a wealthy man who can support her many daughters, whom she will teach to go on and seduce other men so that even the outspoken bigots have a green sexpot waiting at home for them. Even tied up in the basement, bent over and locked in stocks, heavy with another sexy little bitch due in a few weeks that the men expects to train for his own perverse desires, each matron knows who is really in control of their relationship thanks to careful manipulations, contingency plans, and the support of the other matrons and their man-pawns.

>>50863873

>King's Quest 5.png

>>50877741
But maybe "Certainly" and "Of course" are the only sounds the creature can make and only happens to sound like english sentences ?
What about neoteny ? like if you fuck a sapient axolotl, then is it paedophilia or not ?
If you have sex with an alien a lot more intelligent, than you then is it the equivalent for it to fuck a mentally retarted member of it's species, maybe too much to truly have consent for their standards ?

>>50878556
>Power bottoming SO HARD you become a political juggernaut

stop I can only get so erect

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>>50863825
You give them telepathy that's just short of being a legitimate hivemind.

To balance this, you slightly cripple or weaken all of them randomly, forcing them to be symbiotic with one another to survive. Anyone who is tough enough to survive without a partner is revered by the rest of their kind.

>>50863825
>>50876032
Anyone make cute goblin minis in 28mm?

>>50879316
Why is this not a game I can play

>>50872153
Tell that to the inhabitants of the city of Carthage, or the Tencteri and Usipetes. Or any of the several Gallic tribes that ceased existence.

And if that didn't work they fucked you out of existence. Like the Sabines.

My goblins are basically mooks, but creepy mooks that can either infest a village eating all the old, sick and young during the night or ascending like a locust plague to feast on everything flesh in a matter of hours.

They live far, far underground in cthonic caverns that never see the light of day.
They look like a gollum with a face a cross between a goblin-shark and an angler fish, with huge, dish-like reflective eyes and 7 long, spindly, frayed fingers on each hand that regenerate. They can see quite well in the extremely dim bio-luminescent light of their caves but there are some areas that are completely dark, which is where they creep about with using their fingers as antennas.
They can live to be very, very old and grow very large, but most are eaten by their superiors before they can grow bigger than a human 12 year old.
They mostly eat fungi and each other. They farm the fungi like leaf-cutter ants, but clearing trees and debris during the night and bringing it into the caverns as fertiliser.
In their forays to the surface they run into many strange things that an individual goblin has never experienced before, like plants, birds, sleeping children and the stars. They take some of these things underground to be eaten.

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>>50878893
Neoteny isn't really relevant. Being an adult isn't about having the features of an adult. There's a theory that humans are all neotenic; compare our big heads and largely hairless bodies to those of primates.

The Harkness test assumes there's a threshold between human-like intelligence and not that probably doesn't exist. Makes our lives more easy when we eat meat, though. There's definitely a case to be made that other species on the planet have human-like intelligence but can't communicate effectively.

>>50863825
Sex slavery

>>50872153
... the fucking rwandans managed a pretty good job with machettes. The catholic church didnn't neec any for the cathars, bogomils or fuck knows how many other groups either. hell you dont really need anything if you can just round them up & take the somewhere to be locked up & left for four days without water.

>>50872153


There is literally zero evidence that suggests that the Holocaust's pedal driven brain bashing machines and auto jerkoff machines actually helped exterminate jews faster, you could use bullets or sticks just as well.

Goblins are dope
>multiple can occupy one square and get bonuses
>they can ride cavalry in fucking doors
>their wargs are smarter than they are
>they're prone to using poison
>they're sneaky
>they're evil

Gonna use goblin blackguards, of all things, as a major antagonist due to them being able to ride medium sized evil dragons and make them relevant.

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>>50880180
>Crow waifus

>>50873488
resisted invasion by pyscho bastards.
>>50873798
if you're running them as roma then genocide is definitely the best option
t.european

>>50878893
>neoteny
This has never had anything to do with the ability of an individual to give consent. There are a shitload of adult women who're as flat as a washboard and they're still perfectly capable of giving consent. How pronounced the secondary sexual characteristics of a person are has no bearing at all on whether or not they're a consenting adult.

>>50877741
this implies bestiality is a bad thing: why are you shaming people who love animals in the purest form? YOU BIGOT!1!

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>>50880275

>>50865018

wow this was actually pretty funny and I can't even stand Alex Jones

>>50863825
What do you want to fix? There is nothing wrong

>>50872402
>his other nipple gets rubbed raw
>its erect
>but sore

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>>50863825
with Christmas

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>>50863906
There won't be any objections to that...

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>>50881377
That's a cute girl, what's her name?

>>50881377
Life is short and so are they, don't pick and choose gender.

Gobbos are good for only one thing and they know it.

>>50881424

>cute girl

Oh... Anon-kun...

Should we tell him?

>>50881598
Going by the image I'm pretty sure he realizes

>>50872087

Doesn't Genocide imply that you are killing them for their ethnicity/race?

So if they are massacring a city because they rebelled it isn't really a genocide.

>>50881734
>it's not real genocide! Real genocide has never been tried before!

Carthago delende est, my friend. The Romans had no problem wiping out hosts of undesirables.

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>>50881765

>>50881875
That's a real killer meme, my dude. Real fetch.

But if the means of production are not controlled by the working class, it is (by definition) not socialism.

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>>50881922

>>50865036
>I want dwarves
get out stunty

>>50882645
I like dwarves, especially thick busty lady dwarves, they should be love interests in games more often.

For instance look at how often they got snubbed in Dragon Age with weak handwaves such as
>"too much trouble to animate romantic scenes compared to other races"

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>>50879316
>>50878556
>>50877741
>>50876032
>>50877672
>>50877672

>mfw

>>50882687

Dwarven women are sorely underappreciated.

>>50867639
That analogy only makes sense if goblins are around from the Horde's beginning, which they're not.
(Unless you're going back to the old RTS, but at that point, *nobody* has any lore or personality, and dwarves are shown to be as suicidal as goblins, so it's a bit pointless.)

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>>50869729
What Dave?

>>50863902
>Average Goblin Thought Process is like an episode of Xavier Renegade Angel
>"Smoking takes 12 seconds off your life, eating bacon takes 7 seconds off your life"
>"The way I see it, if I smoke enough cigarettes and eat enough bacon, I can go back in time."
>Goblins take an idea that's inherently stupid, and run with it until it CAN work
>Eventually have bacon grease and Nicotine fueled time machines.

>>50863825
WOW inspired anything is garbage.

Tolkien's Goblins are fine.

>>50863825

Mixing goblin archtypes. All the females are WC gobos, while the males are a mixture of Warhammer-style gretchins and D&D moron-savages.

>>50885060
phuck you, shortstack gobbo waifus.

Goblins in my setting were made by a witch, using gross sexy fey magic. They are slaves, and were treated like slaves for a long time, until a human king realised they were actually intelligent creatures with feelings, and gave them a mountain to live in freely. They still work like slaves, but they're happier.

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>>50863825
Why would you need to fix them? Keep them cunnin' but brutal.

>>50881424
Can someone edit this last panel to say

>Now I realize that I'm gay anyways
>Dicks dicks dick
>Finally, I am happy at home

>>50864068
Wait. The Asura are Jews?

>>50885667
Not really. The Asura are science capitalists, but they don't really control any markets.

>>50876032
I was onboard for the:

>Years ago, a magical kingdom created goblins to be cannon fodder - fast breeding, fearless, able to eat almost anything, the plan was to just breed them by the dozen and drown their enemies in rancid little balls of violence.

part.

>>50885629
No, it's fine the way it is.

>>50869580
>you will never be a BBEG with your own gigantic harem of loyal goblin minions

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>>50873101
Yeah, except it would actually make sense.

>>50869871
Isn't that kind of the plot to at least Overlord II? There MUST be a BBEG else the world spirals out of control.

>>50868617

It's time for elves to admit that they're actually goblins.

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>>50869871
>>50873101

>>the world celebrates at the news the overlord is dead
>>all but one of the group responsible returns to civilization to be hailed as heroes
>>holy day declared in honor of the paladin who must stay behind on a lonely vigil
>>by his sacrifice shall the gates of hell remain shut
>>endless poems, songs, and offerings made in his honor throughout history
>>really just spent the rest of his days drowning in green pussy

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>>50863873

>>50869871
>>50873101
>>50888064
That premise is hot and I need more of it in my life.

>>50863825
Step 1. Kill them all.
Step 2. There is no step 2.

>>50888064
I need more of this in my life

>>50889917
But Anon, what are you going to use as replacement for the easy staple of weak and/or humorously randumb race? Goblins are great both because they're often very expendable and also

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>>50872402

>>50872402

God, I love this picture.

So out of place in mtg. But god damn.

I'm writing a story where goblins are the primary non-human fantasy race, with hobgoblins as the more populous human/goblin offspring species which varies in height/appearance depending on percentages. The average goblin would be around 2 feet tall, so hobgoblins range from 3-5 feet.

I have some rough idea that they shared a common ancestry with humans very far back and through magical convergent evolution they're near-identical to humans genetically aside from certain traits common to the race (stunted growth because they developed on an island, a green skin mutation that was helpful in camouflage, pointy ears because I'm a sucker for a magical humanoid with pointy ears, etc.)

>>50893814
>green skin mutation that was helpful in camouflage
I'm sorry, but to me that just begs the question: camouflage against what? Please tell me it's not-dinosaurs.

>>50893968
Any predator what color is grass again?

>>50893968
In a sense a large hawk is a "not-dinosaur". The goblins have always been small and thus relatively easy prey for a lot of species and needed to survive until one invented a particularly sharp stick, so blending into the local foliage helped.

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>>50894022
grey.

>>50880235
>The Cathars

They murdered a close personal friend of the Pope. Not many ways to get out of that one after that.

>>50881377
What is the source for this? I've seen it on a couple of goblin threads, at this point.

Also, why is it that, in terms of fetish fuel/magical realms material, goblins tend to go so prominently together with breeding fetishism?

>>50873101
a bitch king then?

>>50894727
>Also, why is it that, in terms of fetish fuel/magical realms material, goblins tend to go so prominently together with breeding fetishism?
Goblins has a tendency to come in overwhelming numbers. One can assume that excessive breeding is why there's so many. Naturally it caught on with breeding fetishists.

I like goblins to be a balance between cute, ugly, and dangerous. Too cute and they're just waifu monster-girls (example: most anime goblins). Too ugly and they're simply unappealing (example: elder-scrolls), and too dangerous and they're fucktarded (example: Pathfinder) World of Warcraft handles them beautifully.

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>>50895356

Logistically, would it be viable to be the king of a goblin waifu horde? Let's assume there's spells to give you effectively infinite stamina for that purpose and such.

>>50896480

>king of goblin harem
>goblin wives are all vying for your emotional attention though you can cover their physical needs in great mega orgies in the Palace Pleasure Den
>Goblin wives turn their own wombs into soldier production facilities to spawn armies
>They use their children to fight the children of other wives in some kind of 100 person chess game where the 100 Goblin Queens give birth to the other pieces continually
>When they can no longer bear children, they will eventually lose the war as their kids will be removed from the field
>Some queens who can't bear children anymore will form strategic alliances with other queens in the hopes of protecting their continued bloodline and their surviving armies of half-breed children will be used more efficiently
>Mega-faction alliances form as competing super-fertile queens form sub-harems of less fertile/infertile queens who's armies are now on the decline
>You can do nothing as your children commit grievous war crimes against one another while their mothers shove their butts into your face in the hope that you will love them more than the other Goblin wives

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>>50863825
Are you referring to the LotR goblins, D&D goblins, Pathfinder goblins, Warhammer goblins, Warcraft goblins, Artemis Fowl goblins, Final Fantasy goblins, Ragnarok Online goblins, or traditional bogarts? You're going to have to be a little more specific.

>>50895647
Really? I thought it was the combination of that and the "shortstack" thing, so you've got a curvy, breedable monstergirl who you can fill so full of babies she can't walk, and who's too small to stop you from picking her up and having your way with her whenever you wanted.

Talking of sexy, sexable goblins... which would anons prefer in a suitably magical realm setting? Female goblins are hot (males being hot is optional) and produce a half-breed child (be it classified as hobgoblin or half-goblin) with a human male? Or goblins being all-female and so human spouses end up with a gender equals breed scenario, where most of the litter will be goblin daughters and one or two human sons?

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>>50897723
Goblins are their own race, with males and females.

>>50897723
All-female with only goblin daughters. They raid human settlements for food, supplies, and husbands/slaves.

>>50881875
Maybe, but everytime we try lots of people die.

>>50896685
>You can do nothing as your children commit grievous war crimes against one another while their mothers shove their butts into your face in the hope that you will love them more than the other Goblin wives
Ahaha

>>50897723
Definitely their own race with males and females so I can dominate the male goblins and fill their asses up, too

>>50867101
She's actually a dragon or some shit, so...

>>50897760
>>50899187
Just because I'm obsessed with crunch... in such a setting, would you make the offspring of goblin and humans be hobgoblins or half-goblins?

>>50899187
Remind me not to share with you one interpretation of the goblin race I devised, then. In essence, they're all born as males, grow up to be traps, and end up becoming either pregnancy-hungry females, impregnable power-bottom traps or dominant traps, depending on how they fare in the constant struggles for sexual dominance in the tribe.

>>50899681
>in such a setting, would you make the offspring of goblin and humans be hobgoblins or half-goblins?
Let's see, in my setting humans and goblins are the two races that can breed with anything; humans make half-breeds and goblins just make more goblins, so combining the two makes a special hobgoblin. Makes sense to me, anyways.

And that setting of yours is... Very good, very good indeed. Have anything else worked out?

>>50863825
In my custom setting there are no female goblins. They just reproduce from green good in caves.

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>>50899681
>end up becoming either pregnancy-hungry females
So they're alps?

>>50900683
In my custom setting there are no males at all
Only females and hermaphrodites.

>>50869160
Fuck damn

>>50900764
Cute.

>>50900749
you've lost me, anon

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>>50866959

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>>50899681

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>>50896685
>you start to hate them all
>swear off sex forever
>dedicate yourself to the pursuit of knowledge in a secluded tower
>eventually return only to find that they're still warring with each other for the sake of generations old grudges
>now only you can hope to stop the cycle of violence

Would you play it /tg/?

>>50900651
>Have anything else worked out?

Sorry, don't quite follow what you're asking here.

>>50900749
If that's how you want to think of them, then sure.

>>50901868
I suppose it doesn't help that there's a bit more gender-fluidity than that, so even the dommiest of "male" goblins can be knocked up if you overpower them, and breasts and/or female genitalia don't have to come at the expense of male genitalia?

>>50863825
With sex.
Pumping fertile shortstack goblin wombs full with potent human seed.

>>50902223
>even the dommiest of "male" goblins can be knocked up if you overpower them
Is this board seriously going to give me a fetish for gay goblin assbabies? God damnit...

>>50901870

I'm pretty sure this would end in a massive incestous orgy.

>>50877050

In settings where they exist, Goblin females have a tremendously lower mortality rating than their male counterparts which are always seen sitting on the front line. One can infer that goblins, if they're educated at all, are taught by their mothers since chances are their father is dead or indistinguishable from the other dozen gobbos she's been boned by. Goblin mating season is marked by the males doing increasingly reckless and dangerous things in order to impress a potential mate, and this is all balanced by their high breeding level. Goblin elders are more often than not female for this reason as well.

>>50902702
Nah, just recruit some adventurers, send them on a quest to prove their worth then throw em at the girls. Repeat until the ratio is close to 1:3.

>>50902629
Just hope it doesn't get worse from there...

>>50902716
That sounds suspiciously like gypsies...

>>50885382
fuck that, i prefer em brutal, but cunnin'

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How about som fel dragon goblins?

>>50904200
if they are descended from dragons, a okay. if they are half dragons its too special snowflake. if its only a form it better be a curse or a weaken form.

>>50904686
In muh custom setting all the humanoid races are based off the human template which came from dragons+civilization.

>>50904200
SFM porn when?

>>50867245
>where did all the Gauls go?

>>50904200
Oh dear, I want to make half dragons with That chromie.

>>50904808
they were fucked by romans and became franks

>>50905150
Would they be half dragon, half human halfgoblin?

>>50905734
Half human, half goblin that turn into mini dragons in the full moon

>>50905777
So a half goblin werdragon...?

>>50902629
Only if you let it. Really, there's nothing to worry about.

Except maybe if you allow the idea of blasting the king/queen/whatever it was of a goblin tribe and making all of its womenfolk and sons into your lithesome, lusty, green-skinned slaves, who worship you and beg for the privilege of bearing your superior half-goblin/hobgoblin offspring, sound like an erotic dream come true, of course. But so long as the idea of twinky cute goblin bois, voluptuous goblin girls and every blurring of genders along that spectrum, all either swollen with your children or trying to entice into filling them in turn, doesn't sound pleasurable to you, then you have nothing to worry about.

In other news... what's the most interesting "role" for goblins outside of the comedic relief and/or cannon fodder slots, in your opinion? Merchants, feral mystics, enthusiastic engineers?

Dammit, now I want to see if I can find a way to fit my aforementioned ero-goblins into the role of mekanicians in a diselpunk meets magitek fantasy world...

>>50905944
>what's the most interesting "role" for goblins outside of the comedic relief and/or cannon fodder slots, in your opinion?
An extinct race, because they have no use outside of being cannon fodder or literal vermin.

>>50863825
true goblins are all female shortstacks. hobgoblins are the males. hobgoblin/orc crosbreeds are bugbears.

>>50905684
>they were fucked by romans and became franks
No, the Franks were a Germanic tribe that invade the Roman provinces that once formed Gaul.

Thus, the Gauls were fucked by Romans, and became Romano-Gauls and were then fucked by the Franks...

>>50883935
The Dave with the power.

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>>50906022

Femgoblins use Hobgoblins to carry around their stuff during the day and to hold their clothes at night while riding their husbands/masters.

>>50905944
Have you ever written any stories in your setting, Anon? Because I would absolutely love to see your ideas come to life in some sexy stories.

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>>50896685
Sounds like business as usual in the Goblin Kingdom.

>>50906214
I've had two ideas that've been haunting me, one about the wedding day of a trappy human evoker and his kobold boyfriend (kobolds in "my" verse are herms of the "shortstack impregnable trap/shemale, depending on if they choose to grow tits" variety} and another featuring a love triangle between three "evil adventurers; a trappy human necromancer, a kobold, and a goblin. But I've not written them due to various factors, mainly the uncertainity of an interested audience.

If folks were interested, I'd probably write them up. Maybe some more featuring my special goblins too, if that were so desired.

>>50896685
Replace Goblin with monstergirl-ants or some other kind of social insect and I'd love the idea.

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>>50906657

>A predator with a harem of xenomorph queens

>>50906458
>If folks were interested, I'd probably write them up. Maybe some more featuring my special goblins too, if that were so desired.
You are hitting several of my interest points, so please do. Just make sure you share them on the Erotic Fiction General threads on /d/, they keep a compendium of works like yours and mine

>>50902820
Worse from here? I was just a vanilla straight guy when I started coming here, now I become diamonds at the sight of traps and consentacles.

>>50866840
I think they have enough already. Seriously name a carnivorous creature bigger/more aggressive than a fox and it probably eats goblins.

Thought OP had said "How do we fix Goblins?"

First off, every time Thunt feeds his crying fetish, he gets hit in the nuts.

Second: Every time we get narmtastic dialogue like "It hurts like a sickness!" we actually cause him pain

Third: We repossess his house and use the money to pay back all the G:AR backers

As for fixing the goblin race, give them their own little niche in the world. Elves have sticks up their asses, Dorfs have beards and mining, Halflings steal everything that isn't nailed down, then steal everything that is nailed down by stealing the nails. Gnomes fuck around with gadgets and Humans fuck everything and make viable hafus.

>>50882687
DA: inquisition was SO SO disappointing. I can't even get past the character creation because the models and hair styles are so shit.

>>50900749
Booo.

>>50904808
Like all Celts the Gauls got fucked by the Romans and then fucked by the Germans.

>>50906458
Am I missing something, or are your descriptions for kobold and goblins basically the same?

>>50907703
I like how warrant gobbos are the best alchemists

>>50909440
Warcraft*

>>50909440
>>50909454
Pfft, Forsaken are still the top dogs in alchemy, they're just bit lore-boycotted after Wrathgate incident.

>>50906458
Please, Goblin-kun, I would like some more

Prepare for Magical Realm
>It is well known that the Ork tribes south of the wall could easily take the small tract of land the humans have staked. In fear of the greenskins, each month the humans send another of their strongest and most skilled fighters down to the south wall, out into the marshy wilderness to protect their lands. None have ever returned.
>What the races of men don't know, however, is the other side of this story.
>Orks are a strange species. Male orks are small creatures, with long ears and wiry bodies. Females are much larger, standing tall above most humans, with thickly muscular bodies and protruding tusks. The most widely accepted theory about this bizarre sexual dimorphism, theorized by the Scholars of the Capitol Tower of Wizardry, is that Orks somehow have a distant evolutionary connection to spiders.
>These matriarchal ork tribes make large camps in their marshy wilderness, where the women hunt, drink, and fight, while the males cook, work, and handle other tasks more suited towards their small forms.
>For some reason unknown to most, Ork women are fascinated with human males. We can conjecture this has something to do with Ork women being unfamiliar to the concept of men almost as large and strong as they are.
>And so we return back to the problem of the monthly noble sacrifice of our brave warriors.
>Sadly, due to exposure to only the strongest of our race, Orks believe that all mature adult humans are much stronger than they actually are. And even though most are quite strong, they still are no match for an ork club.
>The fates of these men are best left to the imagination, but let's just say that, if encountered by Orks in the wilderness, a brave adventurer eventually ends up in the tent of the Cheiftan.
Cont.

>>50910641
>Even more sad, the strongest of our species, the gilded sons of Adonis of men, rarely last long before...."breaking". When broken, most of these men are tossed back over the south wall into their own lands.
>You would think at least one of these men would return to the capital and recount their tales, but put yourself into the shoes of these men.
>After being given the traditional Ork reception (also known as the "Bonk and Plonk"), passing out due to exhaustion, and being thrown (yes, THROWN) back over the wall, even if you remembered your ordeal, you would most likely wish to never speak of it, or adventuring again
>And so, most of these adventurers wander to the nearest village, learn a trade, and settle down. Most with a strange fear of the color green.
>There is more to the story, of course. What about the adventurers who arent very strong?
>Scrawny humans rarely are seen South of the wall. Mostly because the only men who would dare enter the Ork wilds and NOT be one of the strongest alive are incredibly brave, stupid, and suicidal.
>When encountered by Orks, these smaller humans are not given the same treatment as others.
>Since most humans they have encountered are notably large and strong, and because they think most humans look like that, they believe these smaller humans are actually lost human children.
>Sympathetically, these tribes will gladly take in these humans, handing them off to any Ork woman who wants to take them. Most will gladly take in and raise a human "child", and are quite concerned when they dont grow as quickly as they believe they should.
Additional facts:
>Ork women often have tally marks scratched onto their clubs. The uneducated believe this is how many men they have eaten, but truly the mark is indicative of how many days they have made a captive last without breaking.
>Human "children" are used for all sorts of uses in Ork tribes, such as bed warmers, pillows, or to do up their adoptive mother's hair in the morning.

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>>50910641
>>50910751
Not my particular magical realm, but I see the appeal

>>50866959
Where is the image at the top left from?

>>50911893
They're all omakes from Incase's "Alfie" comic.

Why do you guys always immediately go to sex? Don't you get tired of talking about sex day in and day out?

>>50912213

Only when it's related to the topic of Goblins. They only exist to be cocksocks.

>>50880283
Unless you're in Australia apparently.

>>50885382
This is why goblins are actually potent and a real threat in the Warhammer setting. In Forgotten Greylarion, they might be brutal/cunning, but the rule is they are always bumbling first, and thus never achieve much of note.

>>50884125
So they are like tiny spastic orks.

>>50901870

Slaughter all but the most restrained, and set down the Law.
Then return to the mountain.

>>50901870

>giving up wifebutt because your kids are playing War

Nah.

In my setting, goblins, orcs, and ogres are a single species with very great variation in size compared to the higher sapients

>>50913091
This, some time in the military will do them good.

>>50863825
> CTRL-F ster
> -
a comprehensive sterilization program

Anons? Back in D&D 3.5, there was an actual half-goblin race for the Dragonlance setting. It was actually pretty balanced; +2 Dex/-2 Cha, +2 to Bluff & Move Silently, +4 to saves vs. Charm/Compulsion/Fear.

I was wondering... do you think a 5e version of the race would be viable?

>>50868617

Too soon, man.

>>50914364
Literally first post in the thread (with alternative spelling, but still).

My magical realm setting has goblins as an all-female species that orcs commonly uses for an outlet for their sexual frustration.

>>50917493
Are all the orcs only male? The size difference is certainly nice.

>>50918869
No, but female orcs are rare, so they generally just stay home in orc villages and do female orc stuff, and are frequently the wives of the strongest and biggest orcs. Thus, most male orcs are sexually frustrated.

And of course, size difference is always nice.

>>50914764
Sure, that'd be simple enough. The obvious stuff makes a good start:
>+2 Dex
>+1 Con (gotta have a +1 in something)
>Proficiency in Stealth and Deception
>Advantage against Charm and Fear effects
You'd need to tack on at least another two or three features to make it on the level of other races, but it's a solid base.

>>50904200
Wait. This is fake right? Or did they actually turbed/plan to turn chromie into fel?

>>50919760
It's a skin for Heroes of the Storm.

>>50919826
Oh i see. Thanks. I was getting worrird they had corrupted her. Though i know its just a matter if time for that to happen... hell we might have already killed her in drahonflight form alredy

>>50919645
Thanks for the support. Here's what I was thinking of doing for it stat-wise:
>+2 Dex
>+1 Cha
>Medium
>Speed 30 feet
>Darkvision
>Sneaky Git: Free proficiency in Stealth
>Me Mind's Me Own: Add Proficiency to Wisdom saves vs. Fear and Charm, have Advantage on counter-saves vs. Intimidation and Persuasion
>Nimble Escape: As per Goblin

Sound okay to anons here, or too overpowered?


>>50907365
>>50910246
Hmm... okay. Long story short, I'm fairly centered on an adventuring party turned harem with a tsundere caring-dom/power bottom goblin boi as one of the party. Should I just go straight for the obvious "goblin breeding season" story, or should I go with a relatively smut-free set-up piece first so I can then make use of all the characters in various configurations? Party would consist of one human and four monster-"girls" (goblin, kobold, half-marilith gnoll and cholodrith).

Actually, whether I do the set-up or not, I could kind of use a "gang name" to give the party. I struggle a bit with names... The Crypt Crawlers is what I'm currently planning on going with.

>>50920736
Skip straight to the breeding season story, since this thread is about to cap.

Although a worldbuilding prequel story would be great later.

>>50921227
Can I actually post a pastebin for that here, though? I thought it'd be too /d/ relevant to be linked to from here.

>>50921287
There aren't any rules against Pastebin, as far as I know. Just pictures and videos.

>>50920736
So, what do folks think of these half-goblin stats? I'm not sure how o properly balance these off, even with the Krynnish half-goblin fluff for inspiration.

>>50919922
Meant to say in her infinite dragonflight form

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>>50863825
They need to stop making them look like short green skin jews and turn them into bat/mutt/boar like creatures

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>>50924083
Final Fantasy did Goblins the best

>>50920736
>>50923872
Honestly, the bonus to Wisdom saves makes them seem a /tad/ overpowered, or at least out of character. Aren't goblins supposed to be quite dim, making them more susceptible to influence?

Maybe replace it with an Advantage bonus on crafting and detecting traps.

>>50900749
Why would they be mountains

>>50907589
Don't worry you'll circle back eventually
Or, if that takes to long, just stop looking at porn for a while, it will give you brain time to refuckulate itself back to some what normal levels, or that's just me

>>50924143
It's the Krynnish lore that I'm using as a basis. In essence, half-goblins in that setting are known for being extremely confident, self-assured and fearless - as pointed out some posts back, they actually got a +4 racial bonus to saves against charm and fear effects in 3.5.

>>50907365
>>50910246
>>50921227
Alright, I don't know if you anons are still here, or if I'm going to get banned for this or what, but here's the pastebin at last.

http://pastebin.com/6RvqBT4R

This is my first time writing something like this, so sincere apologies in advance for how it turned out.

And yes, the gobbo femmeboi pic from >>50881377 was the primary inspiration for Zix and his distant relatives.

>>50924539
Happy day! I'll read it later, but for now make sure to post it in /efg/ on /d/, too.

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>>50904200
>This skin is one of my main draws to playing HotS at all.
>This entire fucking thread and its fertility+shortstack+harem fetishes.
>Come to /tg/ for MTG, stay for the Goblins.
I think this might be my favorite thread on /tg/ right now.

>>50876032
>>50877659
>>50877672
>>50896685
>>50904737
Kindred spirits.


Anyway, MTG Goblins are generally more full-retard with pretty much no gender dimorphism, yet still breed like rabbits. On (very) rare occassion, MTG goblins also get to be crazy dangerous genius science-ham types.

Once in a while though, the regular full-retard Goblins have some dignity and/or intelligence slip through by the MTG creative team.
Pic related, compare the flavor texts.
If goblins are full-retards in a setting, what if they're self-aware, and don't care/have pride in themselves?

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>>50927099
we all know the REAL reason they banned this mat. wizards keeping the gobbos down. its a miracle we got a goblin planeswalker even if its brown artifacts.

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>>50927099

Spirit and faith in Gobbo butt is the foundation of peace, justice, and prosperity.

>>50867245
>Implying the wouldn't have genocided the Jews if they had the industrial means to do so

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I kinda like what black desert online did by making goblins a subservient speccies that all the other races just sort of exploit

>>50896685
Sometimes I wonder what's wrong with /tg/, grimdark horrorwar doesn't go well with fun filled fetish fuel.

>>50902629
Assbabies are just disturbing, unless they're eggs or something.

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>>50929141

Solution: Don't install windows in the pleasure den. If you can't see it, it isn't there.

>>50924690
Luckily, my connection decided to eventually cooperate. It's up there now.

So, I might as well risk asking... what do anons think of it? Tolerable, or were you expecting pregnant sexings and not the initial impregnation?

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>>50929141
>Not needing women to procreate
>disturbing
NORMIES GET OUT REEEEEEEE!
http://oglaf.com/son-of-kronar/

Although you'd have a cute slender twink with smooth creamy thighs to mother your children, of course... Not mustached über-men, even though the breeding stock would make for excellent offspring?

>>50863825
Stop making them so fuckable

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>>50929702
I think you're on the wrong website, anon.

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mix with dwarves. Both Dwarves and Goblins are two names for the same race, with the appearance of the latter.
-Forgers
-Drinkers
-Volatile
-Gold-loving
-Hardly workers. Most Low-life goblins prefer dangerous professions than stable ones, because they cannot settle. Most that are unfit to work for themselves as artisans end up as dungeon raiders, gold diggers, bandits or warriors.
-Prone to dependencies and obsessions. Some fall into drugs, booze. Some get addicted to work. Some to bloodlust. Some get obsessed with a chimerical dream.
-Prone to hold grudges for like eternally.
-Some goblins try to redeem their grudges and obsessions by following a goblin religion that promotes new age good vibes. Most of them only do the physical rites. Very few accomplish the internal work needed to overcome their impulsive nature

>>50924539
So, morbid curiosity demands I ask: would there be any interest in any sequels/follow-ups to this work, and if yes, what'd you like to see? I've a cast of five weirdos to play around with and a lot of scenarios, sexual and slice of life, to put them through.

>>50863825

they should rape men too.

equality, motherfucker!

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>>50924539
>>50930877

>>50924539
>>50930877
Follow ups would be nice, but a quick note, spider fur is not cozy at all, it's a nasty bunch of itchy bristles.

>>50863825
More caves, less tinkering

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>>50931143

>Hearing tales about human brutality and lust for Goblin flesh, a young goblin girl decides to go on a rapequest
>"Imma be bagged by a biggun" she tells her cavemates, who all shout "Gob gettum, girl" before they return to their attention to their trinket crafting and gold smelting
>confident in her abilities to be raped, she struts out of the cave and into the forest
>trekking for several miles, the faint smell of baked goods and human sweat causes her pause and she reroutes accordingly
>climbing up a tree, she catches a view of a great human city, massive castles next to one another made from leather, mud, and wood
>In the central square, tall, strong, lean human men engage in brutal and beautiful training combat
>Long hair flowing with their movements, chiseled and broad chests with carpets of hair, pearly white teeth and massive forearms moving swiftly as young human men engage in mock battle with one another overseen by older, rugged and beared human men
>The tree branch becomes more soggy as the Goblin continues to peer across the village, eventually collapsing
>She falls over the village's wall, rolling towards the square where hundreds of handsome human man gather around to stare at her
>"Hiya" she says squeamishly to the increasingly larger crowd of human men around her
>The human men proceed to grab her, with a loud meep coming from her mouth
>Hundreds of handsome human men rub her skin and ears delicately, enamored with the small green thing who wandered in from the forest. Some bring in delicious sweets, drink, or clothes & gems to offer her
>For hours the fiends massage her body and give her candy, but never remove her clothes. Ecstasy washes over the Goblin
>After a wonderful feast of salted ork, the goblin girl heads home, disappointed
>The humans had given her tons of candy, food, and clothing and massaged almost every part of her
>But she felt violated, for the humans did not even have the common courtesy to give her a proper raping

>>50900749
I don't get it.

>>50900749
>>50901000
>>50924283
>>50931812
Not sure what the sex thing is about either, but from an etymological pov:
A Nightmare is called and Albtraum (Alb -dream) in German, Alb or Alp being a creature responsible for your dreams. People though they'd sit on your chest at night causing discomfort.

What the other anon describes sounds more like a succubus I guess. Dunno.

>>50931770
What a dumb goblin, goblins gotta come in a large pack to have any chances of bearing a lone adventurer's babies.

>>50901000
>>50907823
>>50924283
>>50931812
>>50931948
MGE alps are guys who, because they secretly lust for cock, slowly turn into girls. I was making a pun, you see.

>>50931948
In the infamous Monster Girl Encyclopedia, a... well, D&D-style bestiary/encyclopedia of sexy monstergirls that is very /h/, but in many ways too tame for /d/, one of the species is called an Alp. It's a sub-species of succubus created when a gay man is exposed to the corruptive magics endemic in all monstergirls, turning them into a tsundere reverse trap succubus.

>>50932300
MGE?

>>50932354
Monster Girl Encyclopedia

>>50932352
>reverse trap
That's the middle stage. The final stage is full endless-lust-for-dicks girl.

>>50888190
hot

>>50930877
You bet your sweet ass there's interest for more.

As for requests, my thing is people that switch topping and bottoming--I've found that makes for interesting power dynamics. Like one story I read regarding a triad where each person dominated one and was dominated by the other, that was nice. Bonus points for orgies and consensual gangbangs, too.

And don't forget to give yourself a pen name on the /d/ thread! I will definitely want to follow your work.