Carl is the God Emperor, what happens?

>>50422644
The portrayal of the Emperor being a big, bad, mean, daddy to the Primarchs in Black Library novels would actually be justified.

>>50423148

>Emperor to Angron
Emperor: Look, don't beat yourself up over it. There's nothing you can do about this. I mean, it *kinda* was your fault, but hey, screw it. They're dead and you're not.

>>50423645

You forgot the part where he suggests they double team a hooker as a way of getting over it.

Everything doesnt matter

The Horus Heresy

The Black Crusades

It all really didnt matter

>>50422644
> "It don't matter...
> ...none 'a this matters, Horus."

>>50423645
>>50426488
The funny part is...That would probably work.

>>50422644
Would there have even been a horus heresy?

>>50422644
>Hey! Malcador! Come in here, ya' got ta see this!

>>50422644
>>50427613
As Malcador suggested, the Primarchs would most DEFINITELY be female.

>>50427645
>Prima-whatists? What ya' talkin bout Malcador I was taking about my penis! It freakin ginormous! Biomancy is freakin awesome!

>>50427706
>Oh ya mean the boys... I left that to Doc Strange.

>>50427741
>... We are all going to die.

>>50427799
> This is what scattered the Primarchs.

File: 345634.jpg (15KB, 480x360px) Image search: [Google]

15KB, 480x360px

>Look, I'm just saying...
>Just saying what, Horus?! Are you seriously trying to make me convert to Chaos? I ain't doin' that bull*car horn* and you know it!
>I know, I know, but, think about it, if I don't get what I want, then I get very sad. And if I get sad, stuff starts getting broken more frequently, if you, uh, catch my meaning.
>Yeah, sorry, Horus, I'm gonna have to say no to this one. This is stupid even compared to your usual dumbass plans.
>FINE! WE DIDN'T EVEN NEED YOU ANYWAY, MAGNUS THE GREAT AND POWERFUL AND CAN'T EVEN FOLLOW THE DECISION OF THE COUNCIL OF NIKAEA FOR ONE DAMN SECOND! ME AND PERTURABO-
>I'm Angron. At least, I-I think I am.
>I DON'T CARE! ME AND ANGRON ARE GOING TO GO OVER TO THE EMPEROR'S PALACE AND
>MAYBE
>WHEN YOU DECIDE TO NUT UP, I MIGHT DECIDE TO LET YOU JOIN!
>Boy, you sure were raising a ruckus in there.
>Yeah, that's called "laying down the law", and I am dead beat from doing it all day, so if you don't mind, you disgusting hunk of man-shaped meat, I'll LET you carry me over to Father's palace, while I sit here using my magnificent mind to concoct a plan to... do something.
>...
>...
>FOR CHAOS!

>>50429919
Read that in their voices.
Top kek.

>>50422644

>WHO DID THIS TO MY FRICKEN' WEBWAY

>>50429919
Is meatball an angron? This is gold.

>>50429919
More like this.

>>50429919
I now want to see the Entire Horus Heresy, told in the style of an episode of Aqua Teen Hungar Force.

>>50435095
Fund it.

This thread is now Aqua Teen Heresy Force?

So... what other characters are there to assign?

File: Dr._Weird.jpg (36KB, 400x300px) Image search: [Google]

36KB, 400x300px

>>50437779
>Magnus

File: Markula.png (143KB, 463x266px) Image search: [Google]

143KB, 463x266px

>>50438016


Who should he be? As well as the Mooninites and the Plutonians?

>>50438311
>Mooninites
Obyron and Zahndrekh?

>>50422644
Who?

The speech Carl did to meatwad in the superbowl episode is much better if yoy imagine Angron as meatwad and Carl as Empsy.

>>50438740
He's a character from Perfect Hair Forever.

File: 330.jpg (45KB, 680x680px) Image search: [Google]

45KB, 680x680px

>Magnus whattah, Whattyah doin with my Golden Throne there buddy?
>Horus did this! I had nothing at all to do with this
>Yeah yeah and uh, how did Horus do dis when he was on the FRINGE OF THE GALAXY
>woah woah calm down dad, I can explain everything I had a mystical voice in my head tell me all ABOUT how I could save the Imperium as long as I-
>A MYSTICAL FRIGGIN VOICE LISTEN TO THIS GUY!
>I know you're upset but you need to calm down and not sick the Space Wolves on me.
>Oh you're right I'm gonna calm down and I'll get my gun AND sick the space wolves on you, you friggin IDIOT

>>50438016

>Space Marines, BEHOLD! I have made love to this tomb!
>Wow. How is that even possible?
>She was drunk! She didn't know what she was doing!
>Um
>*mutated spawn crawls out of tomb*
>MY MAGICAL BOY!

>>50438016
I'm pretty sure Doctor Weird would be the Chaos Gods.

All of them.

Frylock is a better fit for Magnus.

The Webway don't matter. None of this matters.

>>50444303

Crusadin', whateva. Yanno, whateva.

You do what you like to do, and I'll do what I like to do, okay?

But you're a sucker. You're gettin fed this line about how, like, you're gonna live forever or whateva--you're gonna die.

Someone'll kill ya.

Someone'll kill ya with a power knife.

>>50422644

Hey if uh, any of those Nids come near ya, just hit 'em with the shampoo.

>>50438767
GET YOUR MEAT AS OUT HERE, AND HAVE SOME FUN WITH ME!

File: hey, uh, custodes dude, come 'ere for a minute.jpg (123KB, 885x515px) Image search: [Google]

123KB, 885x515px

>Well, look. I mean, is he gonna be able to chase us? Cause if I woke up lookin' like that, I would just run towards the nearest living thing and kill it.

>>50447623
>Gentlemen, we have the technology. We can rebuild him.

File: Ignignokt.png (326B, 200x168px) Image search: [Google]

326B, 200x168px

COME NOW OMEGON

LET US FORM THE ALPHA LEGION

File: Leman Russ.jpg (65KB, 480x360px) Image search: [Google]

65KB, 480x360px

>Ruinous Powers, I want you to meet... Leman Russ.
>I want my name to be Great Wolf.
>Alright, it's Great Wolf. Whatever, I don't care. Just... you know, just do what I tell you.
>...The hell you lookin' at?
>I'm your fadda, I just made you.
>Haha, I got your fadda right here, hehehehe, I got your spiritual liege, hahahahaha!

>>50447928
>Horus Banana: Tonight...YOU!!!

>>50448205
>All I know is good... and ball... and heresy.

>Hey custodes, check out this pict of this totally hot chick I created, just ta bang!

>Uh.. sir.... that's totally a dude

Creation of Fulgrim

Hey ah moon man. Where's my friggin giant robo suit or whateva. This chair is chaffin the boys and I ain't able to scratch. Ya know what I mean?

>>50447777
Those quads. <3
I am Alpharius

>>50448274

Hahaha-yeah! TONIGHT!

File: 1300797600611.jpg (53KB, 451x392px) Image search: [Google]

53KB, 451x392px

>>50439483
10/10
Read it in their voices.

File: 1467898828130.jpg (103KB, 517x768px) Image search: [Google]

103KB, 517x768px

>>50439483
Very well done.

>>50447928
Funniest post in the thread.

>>50422644
Now the design choices behind the Sisters of Battle make sense.

>>50447928
Alright, I did let out a loud kek, well done

>>50449251
Sisters of Battle came after Emps was already on the golden toilet.

>>50427142
Honestly Carl would probably have been a better emperor than the emperor.
>Lorgar starts worshiping the emperor
"Whatever, it don't matter, none of this matters."

Would Dr.Weird be Fabius Bile?

>>50453959
>GENTLE MEEEEN! BEHOLD!
>DAEMONCUBALA!
>Uhhh.. Dr. Beird, That's just a space marine with no skin
>LET ME SHOW YOU THE MOOOOOOTHER!
>AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH

File: what happens after you finish a request.jpg (156KB, 1441x977px) Image search: [Google]

156KB, 1441x977px

>knocking noises
>Emperor. Emperor! Yo, Emperor! Open the wall.
>Damn it.
>I got somethin' to tell you.
>Go away. Go away... So tired of this. Friggin' go away, you freak.
...
>Father, did you lose something behind the couch?
>YEAH, I DID, I LOST MY ONLY CHANCE TO ACTUALLY GET THIS IMPERIUM TO NOT BE COMPLETELY FUCKED! WHAT DO YOU NEED, WHAT DO YOU WANT, CAN I NOT JUST LIVE HERE WITHOUT OCCASIONALLY DEALING WITH YOU WASTES OF GOOD GENESEED!

>>50450451
Is it like the super toilet frylock "Gave" him in that one episode?

File: 1336481565103.png (26KB, 480x325px) Image search: [Google]

26KB, 480x325px

>>50454163
Is Frylock Magnus in this scenario?

>>50422644
>Le obscure show that no one cares about.

>>50454486
You have to be over 18 to post on this site.

>>50454548
actually, that doesn't even hold up, because loads of kids know about and like ATHF, so it must be some old fogey trapped in nostalgia

>>50453226
A random fucker from the street would have been a better Emperor than the Emperor was.

>>50454079
MY NAME IS

>>50447777
>you will never be blasted by Alpharius and Omegon's quad laser