Mooks ahoi!

Benefits are good, and I get to act out my impulses. Same as any minion.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q2PxxbJydBU

>>50394058
I am a very generic person with little ambition in life. I'm okay with a jumpsuit and possibility of being one day killed by secret agent or something. Maybe get weekends off work?

>>50394058
They've got better dental than FBI.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-CG5w4YwOI

>>50394058
I have no marketable skills beyond my moral flexibility.

>>50394058
I'm really interested in the 401k match program. Plus, as the other anon said, you can't beat that dental

I want to realize my life-long dream of laughing maniacally.

On my target practice I miss 10/10 shots, with everything from a sniper to machine gun. I can on special occassions hit side-characters, but that's only after taking an extra re-education course.

It's been ages since I had to do that. Besides that my morals are like my problems, I ignore them untill they go away.

I hate my life and want to die.

>>50394058
Although on the surface I am a conformist, I have a hidden side of mental instability. In five years I see myself, not as a mook, but as a quirky miniboss.

Because we've got movie sign!

>>50394058
I plan to usurp the boss' place and eventually become leader of *insert-generic-super-villain-organization-name* and rule de world. When do I start?

It has great union benefits.

>>50394058
I think I would work well as the token moral Mook who gives the heroes an excuse to angst about what they do and provide a hint of that grey-and-grey morality that's hip these days.

>>50394058
I feel that working here can help further my career goals. I'm hoping to advance to an elite enemy-type position.

I have crippling memory problems, no moral compass to speak of, and my clumsy shaking hands mean I can barely hold a gun straight enough to look threatening, so I figured, why the hell not? If someone shot me in the head right now, I'd probably brush it off as 'just the wind' in forty seconds, tops.

If needed I could develop a smoking habit that would give intruders more opportunities to evade me, as well as make me less morally relatable. I am also capable of urinating on walls to make it obvious that I am a degenerate who is not performing his duties.

My terse lower-class accent could admittedly use some work, but my previous experience as a Walmart greeter means I can belt out canned dialogue like it's nobody's business.

>>50394058
What else am I going to do with a philosophy degree?

>>50394058
I will engage the protagonists in melee.

>>50394058
>I don't. My parents just want me to move out, and no one else is hiring.

File: download (15).jpg (10KB, 259x194px) Image search: [Google]

10KB, 259x194px

>>50394058
I want to live my dream of being in the middle of the struggle between Heroes and Villains. I have extensive knowledge on most major heroes, villains, and geniuses, and am extremely Genre Savvy.

Plus, like everyone else said, there's just no beating the dental. I hear total Jaw reconstruction surgery is covered in the case of getting punched by some superhero or other.

>>50394058

Because I deserve to be here.

Here is my negative review from my previous employer, *instert-generic-superhero-organization name*

>>50394058
Honestly, I'm a borderline sociopath and I'm looking for other people who won't judge me for lacking any sort of actual moral compass. I feel like this sort of organisation is the only place I'm going to find any sort of real human connection.

In return, I'll use my modest talents to further the aims of the organisation, and lacking any other true purpose or direction in life I will be free to devote myself to it's ideals and goals.