Quickest Character Deaths

>>50269086
Why not just build another character and join back in?0

>>50269086
>a minute or two in, not even at character introductions yet
>try to mess with the DMPC (didn't really know that he was one at the time)
>get in a fight but don't intend for it to get serious
>roll 3 critical misses in a row, one on a really easy save
>Get murdilated

Not really a proud moment, but eh, it was funny enough.

>>50269114
Because a lot of the most deadly games also have stupidly in-depth chargen, and/or some GMs are twats who pitch a fit if you just say "okay here's my new character, he's my dead character's brother" and try to hop back in.

>>50269086
>me and my group start a new campaign
>I'm the DM and said adventure starts on a cliff with the PCs as captives of a tripe that sacrifices their captives by throwing them off the cliff
>Make it clear that the group is on the very edge off the cliff several times
>Over the course of a short RP event the PCs manage to free themselves
>The barbarian picks a large stone up and announces that he wants to take a step back to leap at the tribe
>Ask im if he's sure
>He says yes and falls off the cliff
>Ask him again if he really wants to do this
>He says yes again

I really tried to save him, but he didnt listen.

>>50269178
looks like that barb hit rock bottom

>>50269086
My and my gaming group got into a fight with I guess a pretty high powered dragon in RIFTS. He cast some spell on my robot pilot that any damage he would deal to the dragon, it would deal to him. Then I crit failed a pull punched head grab and crushed my own head.

That was like 15 minutes into the fight. The fight lasted another six hours. The whole time I didn't consider making a new character during that time either.

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>>50269086
>gm dark heresy
>group enters combat
>first in initiative throws hallucinogen grenade
>botches the throw and it falls right in the middle of them & the enemies
>they get various degrees of bad results
>all enemies get frenzy
>1 hour in and at 0 things done, the assassin gets butchered while screaming that his arms are melting

>>50269086
I once was rolling up a character fro Traveler and my character died during character creation.

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>>50269270
Sounds pretty funny in retrospect.

>>50269302
>NB: must be in play deaths, not any of this shitty Traveller "death during chargen" stuff.

literally learn to read you mongoloid retard

>>50269165
this guy died to rats as a barbarian. He was likely level 1 in a D&D derivative. That's a 15 minute character.

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>really shitty GM
>want to highlight his shittyness
>roll up a lvl 12 Monk
>dig through every splat book i can find
>will always hit with a +34 unarmed strike
>2 negative level damage in every hit
>6 hits per flurry
>start in a tavern
>get in a fight with the other two players cuz they wanted to start shit
>round 1, flurry the fuck out of fighter
>he so dead
>tank a lightning bolt spellnfrom wizard
>round 2, flurry the wizard
>he so dead his twin brother across the planet does too
>round 3
>get eaten by "random" Purple Worm
>Total play time: 7 minutes

>>50269467
>Killing other players to "show how the GM" is shit
You ever heard the saying "if everyone you meet is an asshole, maybe you're the asshole". Seems to fit in this situation.

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My friend's bard died to a "save or die" spell on turn 2 of a combat that opened up a session. To be fair it was a one shot, but it was probably only 7 or 8 minutes in.

>>50269086

>Playing DnD 1E
>Roll up a fighter
>This is before we had any sort of rules about max HP on first level, there was an "optional" that we weren't playing with at the time, that you'd get the better of two rolls on 1st level.
>Anyway, my fighter, due to some shitty rolls, has all of 2 HP.
>And we're on our way to whatever dungeon it was
>And we come across a door. It's not even locked, just stuck
>Well, I've got a 17 STR, I bash it down!
>Roll badly
>Injure myself bashing the door.
>1d3-1 damage
>Roll 3
>Die.

>>50269565
Yeah, in hindsight, I was just being a huge dick. I thought I'd if I was an as, just like the GM was, he'd learn his lesson.

All that happened was we got into a huge fight, every bottled up emotion was uncorked, and we didn't see each other for about 6 months.

It wasn't entirely my fault, we had a ton of other problems, but i was the catalyst.

Eventually, we came back together and worked it out. We've played together for the last 5 years after that.

>>50269086
The most famous one in our group was when we were all playing as Dragons in the old Council of Wyrms setting. Key to the setting: dragons rule everything, and the players are dragons who get class-levels rather than normal HD. Shit is bananas and amazing.

The first session of the game began with us all hatching out of our eggs, just as the hatchery is being raided by ogres who are trying to steal us for nefarious purposes. So we hatch in the middle of a melee and gang up on them, and our initiative score is when we emerge from the egg to join in.

It gets to the squishy Copper dragon bard's turn, and they immediately charge out of their shell at a nearby Ogre mage, to some effect. The very next person in the initiative order is the Red dragon fighter, who has took every single breath weapon feat they can. They explode their egg, and breathe over the ogre and the Copper, burning them both to death instantly. Total time alive: roughly two and a half seconds.

The GM was nice, announced that was an unrelated copper, and let the bard respawn out of a new egg. The red dragon did skin the other and turn his scales into a chef hat though. God that campaign was great.

>>50269403
>This meta bait

>>50269086
>Running Halloween one shot this year
>Party is invited to the town for harvest festival by an old friend and his wife.
>Get there and the wife is missing and the husband is acting sketchy as fuck
>They stay the night with him, explore the creepy house and find that every exit is barricaded to prevent something from getting in.
>Cleric unblocks the chimney, sees it's coated in dried blood then decides he wants to sleep directly in front of it while everyone else takes bedrooms.

Yeah the party heard a thud that night and never saw him again. He lasted about 20 minutes.

>>50270261
>Cleric unblocks the chimney, sees it's coated in dried blood then decides he wants to sleep directly in front of it while everyone else takes bedrooms

Even teen horror characters aren't that genre blind. What did his player expect to happen?

>>50270303
I have no idea. We played with this guy for a month and I feel like I have a hundred bizarre stories about his play. Every session I'd have 2-3 other players PMing me asking me what the fuck he was doing.

He was hands down the WORST player I have ever seen. We just removed him from the group because of shit like that. Every session.

He wasn't even an intentionally bad player just so utterly oblivious to everything. Like he couldn't put 2 and 2 together.

>DM tells us to show up with the most broken characters we can
>I make a muscle wizard
>K makes a Tome of Battle dude
>B makes a half werewolf, half vampire, half ogre, half minotaur abomination
>DM limits me to 50 strength at creation, "To prevent anyone from being too strong."
>B shows up with 70 base strength
>Beginning of combat starts in a dungeon
>DM smiles as we are forced to face ourselves in combat
>Toss an antimagic field at the other me, let the other two handle him while I solo their counterparts
>Force cage is a hell of a drug
>Two rounds later they're all dead
>DMPC god steps out of nowhere and kills us, removing all our templates and turning us into skeletons
>K and me just kind of walk out to get a pizza and never go back

I still have no idea why he wanted us to start at level 20, with broken characters, only to nerf us all within the first session.

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>>50270375
Reminds me of one of my best friends and also one of the worst roleplayers

>Party gets attacked by werewolf in the middle of the forest
>Retreat to a cabin near a clearing
>The back wall starts getting smashed by the werewolf
>Everyone gets armed and in hiding
>He gets his back against the bloody wall
>Werewolf breaks in, he gets knocked out cold
>After the session was over, I ask him why
>"I thought that he would just start waving his arm inside"

also

>Asks werehouse worker about classified inf
>"I can't tell you that! If I tell you, I'll be fired!"
>Attempts intimidate
>"If you don't tell me, you'll be fired."

>DnD 3.5e, PCs are 12th lvl, wandering around in a hueg government magical library
>Player introducing new character, gray elf malconvoker to party. Sent as reinforcements by the partys' boss
>Walks up to party and says hello. Without explanation summons giant centipede to impress party or something.
>Goliath druid panics and casts miasma. No save, lungs are full of red smoke
>elf chokes to death while goliath grapples the centipede. 0 to dead in 30 seconds


And that's how goliath druids AND miasma got banned in my party.

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>>50270622
>>Walks up to party and says hello. Without explanation summons giant centipede to impress party or something.

What a fucking idiot.

>>50270531
>>Asks werehouse worker about classified inf
>>"I can't tell you that! If I tell you, I'll be fired!"
>>Attempts intimidate
>>"If you don't tell me, you'll be fired."

Pshthaha, how did that one go over.

>>50270764
I didn't even allow him to roll. The first of two times I've auto-failed someone's social attempt. Then he tried fistfighting the worker and the party was ejected from the premises, because it was three of them versus twelve people.

At least he never complained at the results he got due to his dumb actions, so props to that.

>>50269086
The first boss in the first session hit me with a critical on a mercurial greatsword, cleaved me in half. Every character who wielded that sword after ended up dying, and we eventually ditched it because we were convinced my first character's vengeful spirit became bound to it.

>>50269796
>a dragon wearing the scales of another dragon in a chef hat fashion
There are moments when I wish I could draw things. This is one of those moments.

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I once had a player in Dark Heresy playing a deposed noble. They were meeting the "Inquisitor", actually his Interrogator, for a briefing, where he was accompanied by his retinue of a Commissar, a Death Cult assassin and a Magos built like a dreadnought.
The player got bored during the meeting and tried to shoot the Interrogator and escape. It did not work.

>>50271473
I suspect he was bored of the game, not the meeting.

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>online 5e with close friends
>and one that guy
>says "i want to talk to the goat"
>he doesn't have speak with animal prepared
>first encounter
>tries to hug a monster and gets ko'd
>second encounter
>tries to hug a monster and gets ko'd

After that encounter he just asked us to kill him and left.
Later he said that he would be interested in a IRL campaign

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>Running WW2 one-shot set in pacific
>4 PCs land on the beach at Tarawa, are briefed by the lieutenant
>He tells them to check in at the airfield, and to avoid the jungle to the west - its crawling with Japs
>Sniper immediately decides to walk into the jungle alone
>Fails to spot a hidden MG nest
>Is shot in the head and killed immediately

Total play time: 5 minutes into session.

I let him "respawn" as a shitty marine and the party was able to complete their objectives, although most died in the process. They got in a Stuart and had a brief scuffle with a Chi-Ha, then with a few of them dead and some wounded, they packed a jeep with explosives and suicidally drove it into a Japanese artillery position, detonating it and completing their mission.

WW2 only really suits one-shots due to the high lethality.

>>50270375
Getting rid of him is kind of a dick move when he didn't mean anything by it.

>>50269086
Paladin, CoS. He was introduced halfway into Death House and lasted three rooms, dying to protect a fellow party member (who he had only met recently, but he was of the self-sacrificing sort).

>>50269229
That's House of Glass. You can't cast that on someone you can't see and/or is in a vehicle, power armour, etc.
So that was a bullshit move on your DM's part.

>>50270842
now you know you have to share the second time you auto-failed a social attempt.

>>50271145
The bard-dragon dies multiple times that campaign, and was skinned for a hat on several occasions before we resurrected them. They still enjoyed the campaign though, weaving immense quantities of trickery and bullshit everywhere.

The Red dragon player left halfway through, which was actually pretty okay because they were the only CE character in a mostly Good party. They were replaced by a CN White dragon barbarian/draconic defender (like dwarven defender), whose preferred tactic was to land on an enemies face, latch on like the world's angriest house-cat, and announce this was the spot they were defending. They then became our leader, by virtue of announcing plans loudly and none of the rest of us wanting to argue with them.

That campaign was only the second time I'd ever roleplayed, and there were enough shenanigans to fill an entire storytime thread. It ended with every character ascending to divinity/immortality in different ways, pretty much becoming a new pantheon.

>>50269086
Play 5ed. first session. first five mins. driving a caravan. We were Lv1 and got ambushed by goblins on the side of the road. Two max crits during the surprise round. Failed my stabilize checks. Wasn't even mad. I was just laughing. Gm took mercy and retcon the death. Later on I got to be more useful.

>>50269086
>"see you next week"
What?
I mean, every group has its rules, but you're not supposed to be kicked out of the session just because your character dies. Usually you stay, enjoy the time with your friends, see how they screw things up, and meanwhile roll your next character. Then you just wait until the GM is ready to have your new character meet the party.
And I mean, this is *particularly* egregious if it's the first twenty minutes of the first goddamn session.

>>50269144
>DMPC killings PCs in the first two minutes
I guess your DM is really proud of this, huh?

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>>50270531
>werehouse

>>50269178
>>50269224
That's a funny death though. The players will remember it.

>>50269086
Technically not death during chargen, but...

>online PF campaign
>DM watched and approved our character sheets.
>I play half-orc sorcerer, other players are Dwarf paladin, Human wizard and another sorcerer, Kitsune.
>"you all start at the town square, overlooking the burning of Kitsune sorcerer at the stake..."
>kicks Kitsune player

The game lasted for two incredibly awkward sessions afterwards. To this day i'm not sure why our DM even approved of that character if he was going to kill him anyway.

>>50274996
Sounds awesome, especially the implication that the party had a collection of hats made from the bard's skin.

>>50275215
>Muh feel of power
>Look guys, I don't have a small dick!
Both are the same, but you can pick only one.

>>50269086
Fastest Character Death Award has to go to any system that allows for your character to die during character creation.

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>>50275215
>>"you all start at the town square, overlooking the burning of Kitsune sorcerer at the stake..."

As it should be. Furry scum do not deserve rejection, they deserve humiliation.

>>50269086
Not me but a friend's MERP character had hilariously short lifespan.
>character starts game in tavern where rest of the group has gathered
>character is some truculent fighter and sees huge guy in tavern
>"I'm going to prove my worth by beating this man in a brawl"
>huge man turns out to be Beorn
>character dies within minutes of gameplay

This was a campaign back in college, only lasted a few sessions but it was fun.

One of my friends is playing a dwarf with two axes named Axebeard Beardaxe. We get our introductions done, get the starting quest, then head out on the road. At one point, he just leaves the party, wanders into the woods, and finds a bear. Now, bears at level 1 ain't nothing to fuck with, but he couldn't give less of a shit about that, and dives after it. After getting pummeled to near death, he tried to climb a tree to get away...you can guess how that went.

In the next town we met another dwarf named Beardaxe Axebeard.

>>50275373
That's odd, he had the same name of the previous dwarf's axes!

>dm a world war 2-ish game
>make a car chase intro scene
>one of the players decides that trying to throw a grenade towards the following car while inside of a speeding car on a pumpy road is a good idea
>whatcouldpossiblygowrong.png
>less than 15 minutes in and tpk because the player managed to fuck up throwing the grenade and it blew up inside of the car

Our Rogue Trader game started out with us being beaten in prison (Causing some damage which was mostly cosmetic and certainly not critical for anyone) on some awful Imperial planet, and when we were finally SENTENCED TO DEATH BY EXPOSURE in the wilds outside, one of the two astropaths, who had absolutely nuked their starting toughness and wounds into the ground, died 10 minutes later simply from the damage that the snow on this awful planet did over time.

>>50275009
This is why you have a DM-screen and hidden rolls. This exact instance.

One of our long-term partymember, who is a terrible minmaxer had a well-deserved death in the first session for one if his characters.

He's a great guy, but it's like he can't help himself. I blame his penchant for MtG - he sees exploitable rules, and he exploits them.

Anyway, after the demise of his first character - he rolled up a 2-handing paladin, with all sorts of stuff to increase crit-ranges, and a keen greatsword, power attack and smite.

Going for absolutely ridiculous damage output.
First 2 rounds of her first ever combat she does like 60 and 50 damage. We are level 4 or 5, I think.
And then she takes a full attack from a 7-headed hydra, and gets literally torn apart at the waist.
Of course, he went on to make an equally broken character, so it didn't matter all that much. Now we've switched to 5e, and things are somewhat better.

>>50274465
I guess I have.

It was during an encounter the party that got the hallucinogen death got later. What is happening is that one of them has snuck inside the den of one important bad guy and then they spot him arriving. All three of them try, but fail due to pretty shitty luck. And then one of them goes
>PC: "Excuse me sir, but can't help but notice your magnificent moustache. Would you care to go into that dark alley where my friend will trim it for you?" What do I roll
>Me: Nothing.

First 10ish min a gunner falls down an icy chasm and to save himself from the pain of impact he blew his head off with his shotty.

there was a giant pool of water at the end of the chasm.

>>50269165
even so, no in-depth chargen takes over seven hours. he could've joined later, but still in same session

>>50276615
To be fair, if you're using real-world physics, the water would have fucked him up hard on impact. It's not a soft landing like it is in Source Engine vidya, ask anyone who's belly flopped off a diving board. Surface tension is a bitch.

>>50269601
good thing it was just a bard

>>50269086
>playing DH
>pcs see my pc walking thru the desert barefoot whilst driving in an armored transport
>they almost hit me, botch the drive check, careen out of control, crash into a dune
>I go to see if anyone is hurt
>the warpspawn they are transporting is in the vehicles armored cupola
>I see it
>GM tells me to roll fear check
>I tell him I frenzy and charge
>flagellant+frenzy= immediate reaction frenzy status on command, immune to fear
>get to the truck
>athletics check to scale the truck, roll so damn good the GM basically says I leap and wallrun up the truck
>in the warpspawns face, sword in hand
>warpspawn tries to turn the mounted gun my way, can't, in CC
>start laying into it, screaming abrogations against all that is sinful and evil
>rest of the party piles out of the truck, some start taking shots at me
>ignore them, still laying into the warpspawn as he struggles with the giant club in the cupola
>sororitas with a twohanded chainaxe and plate armor clambers on
>ignore bolter bitch, too busy killin' warpspawn
>she attacks me, I parry with my blade
>defenders of evil are also evil, draw my pistol, swinging at warpspawn, shooting at armor dyke
>she attacks again, big damage, flub parry
>cuts my leg off mid-thigh, I go down
>fail toughness check to not die of shock
>burn fate point to survive
>still bleeding out
>party tries to stabilize me
>fails
>repeatedly
>like 7 times in a row
>take enough fatigue from bleeding out I die again
>I allow my pc to die, because if I burned fate I'd be starting the campaign with literally zero fate points
>from character introduction to death, it was about 20 minutes
>ONLYTWENTYMINUTESNOX.webm
So ended Penelope, the penitent noble guardswoman, cut down before her new life even began.

>>50269617
Horray for happy endings.

>>50269609
Wow. Things sucked back then

>>50276200
>no fun

>>50277208
The DM was an idiot.

>>50277252
>no retardation
FTFY

>>50277208
Probably half of all the problems that edition were caused by all the random chargen.

>>50275373
he lived and died like a true dwarf!

>>50269086
It was traveller but it wasn't during chargen.
It was my first time running the game and I didn't know damage goes directly to CON instead of a hp pool.
A soon-to-be-ex-cop PC straight up murdered a rather frail ex-pirate PC with a tazer during the introduction scene.

>>50277267

The other half were the retardedly high damage suggestions for accidents. Tripping and falling, and I'm not talking about falling down a flight of stairs or something, I mean just like falling on your face in a flat plain, often did around as much damage as being stabbed with a dagger, and could easily be fatal to a level 1 character.

>>50277134
WHY were they attacking you?
WHY was a sororitas defending a fucking daemon, when she should've been challenging you to fastest chopping contest?

>>50277266
>not rolling to see how the badguy reacted or to see how badly the player failed and modifying the reaction based on that.

>>50277455
On my defence, such a stupid thing would give him a -30 and with him rolling untrained and with low Fel, every possible reaction became a variation of his scowl when he inevitably casted Inflict Pain on him.

>>50277438
>WHY were they attacking you?
I was attacking their mission priority.
>WHY was a sororitas defending a fucking daemon
Wasn't a daemon, was a mutant that rolled a nat 100 result on the mutation table. (yes, yes, I know, don't bother). Their inquisitor boss had ordered them to go into the desert and retrieve it for him, and the sororitas assumed it was some manner of retrieving it for proper disposal.
It being in the cupola was an oversight by the players, but I had to play it straight.

>>50277489
that's some radical bullshit

>First session of the game, I'm the GM. The world is a stone age/barbarian setting.
>Player A is an orc rangerbarian, player B (his son IC) a half-orc half-cyclope bardbarian, player C (not from their tribe) is a centaur sorcebard.
>Characters meet each other in the wild : A captures C as a slave. C is cool with it : my players are all friends and it could bring interesting dynamics.
>A and B's tribe is hunted by a giant murderous bear. After coaxing from the two bards, they manage to convince the trisbespeople to fight back, and start a giant hunting party with groups of three/four tribesmen.
>The idea is that as soon as a group finds the bear, they'll warn the others with a horn.
>A and B naturally go with their new slave.
>They find a giant cave with giant bear prints and dead people and giant bear droppings.
>But since they're not sure the bear is there, they decide they'll investigate. More glory this way! For their defense, they did sound their horn to warn the other groups, they just didn't want to wait for them.
>I think I should mention there that character A is an old orc. He's still a good tracker, but age hasn't been kind on his hearing. He's half-deaf.
>As the best tracker, he's still going first.
>After some very infortunate rolls, he gets surprise-attacked by the giant bear, and almost flattened here and there.
>His son pulls him out of danger and they try to run for it.
>Unfortunately, a half-cyclope carrying an inconscious body and a centaur do take quite a bit of space, so they're blocking each other and getting mauled by the bear.
>So the cyclope, naturally, violently pushes the centaur out of the way.
>The centaur, as the weakest member of the group, promptly gets bearmurdered.
>Cyclope exits, pursued by a bear.

I did feel bad about it, since it was the first session and I suppose they expected the reinforcements to come faster. So he's playing the centaur's twin, now.

>>50269086

What kind of party doesn't have backups? What kind of GM doesn't allow you to join in with a backup or hell control a NPC?

Fuck i bet you folks didn't even have rope with you.

>One-shot, magical postapoc, custom system I made in like 30 minutes
>2 players, one is a gunslinger other is a gambler mage
>Begin game in a field
>Gunslinger says "I look down at the ground and stare at it."
>Giant magical worm jumps out and starts chewing up his face
>Both spend a round of combat trying to kill it
>They realize that this thing is going to kill gunslinger next round
>Gambler has a spell that can heal- but he's a gambling mage so the same spell has a chance to harm instead
>He can put it 70/30 in favor of the effect he wants but that's it
>Casts on gunslinger
>Harm effect
>In the second round of existence the gunslinger was killed by his fellow party member
I know this was terrible GMing but in my defence, I stated it would be overly lethal, they put about 3 minutes into their characters, and gunslinger continued on as a ghost. and most importantly, everyone had a good time of it.

>>50277663
how many eyes has a half-cyclope got anyway?

also, a stone age campaign sounds cool

>>50275617
I agree. Open rolling is good mostly for short campaigns.

>>50275617
It's how the dice fall, bro

>>50277495
The inquisitor is clearly a radical.
Amusingly enough, when they got the hellspawn back to their base, the interrogator killed him by "mistake".

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>>50269086
>D&D 3.5, playing a monk
>Session one
>tried to be stylish and jump over a group of enemies
>failed my Jump check and ate six attacks of opportunity
>-10 before I even hit the ground

I then made a cleric who lasted through the entire rest of the campaign and utterly dominated in combat.

>>50278298
And sometimes it's shit

>>50278350
and that is all there is to know about monks in D&D

>>50270400
Reminds me of a dm I had

>Lets everyone get away with murder using broken templates
>That's ok, my best friend is a level 30 black dragon/angel
>He's gonna train you for holy warriors despite being evil
>Every other player quit the first session, I kept trying to get killed, but the dmpc kept rescuing me 'cause he needed someone to talk at.
>I didn't roll any dice the entire game

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>>50278384
I feel like people like your DM there would have more fun in freeform games in internet chatrooms, the kind that have no stats or dice or even rules. The kind where EVERYONE plays a half-angel half-demon half-dragon type of character, and just exists to show off to all the other half-angel half-demon half-dragons how cool they are.

>>50278384

Stuck in a perpetual nightmare.

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>>50275303
>Willingly lets a player into your game
>Oversees his character generation
>Tells him what time the session starts
>Waste his time by making him plan to have SEVERAL HOURS FREE right then

>Lol guys I killed his character he's sucha fag

Pokedol does not approve

>>50278356
When life gives you shit you make shitelade.

>>50275251
I know nothing of Traveller, but how is dying during chargen even a thing?

>>50278557
Basically, you do stuff in your "background", which is chargen, that determines your numbers.
The more times you go around the block, the higher your numbers get, but the more likely something really bad happened to you in the process.
Say you have one go around, set off, the odds of something bad happening is a percentage of 1%.
You do it 6+ times, you will have sky high numbers, but you could end up crippled, insane, or dead. The more you do, the stronger you get, but the more likely you won't get thru it all intact.

>>50278708
So 3 to 5 times is a good balance?

>>50278761
5 is pushing it, 6+ is almost assuredly fucked.

>>50269086
Not mine but,
>Playing 70s fbi shenanigans
>3 sessions in
>Friend has made awful rolls for the last two sessions
>Finally rolls like a god, clears out a warehouse Dirty Harry style
>He specifically wanted a 1911
>He fired 5 times
>He cocked the gun afterwards, just in case someone was hiding after the shootout.
>Revels in his newfound glory, wants to spin his gun like Revolver Ocelot
>GM reminds him of aforementioned facts
>GM flat out tells him not to
>Does it anyway, rolls a 1
>GM trembling, asks to roll again
>1
>"So you shot yourself, roll to see where?"
>Rolls yet another 1
>After clearing out a warehouse full of armed communists, our top agent shoots himself in the head, only three sessions in.

>>50278125
Rule 1 of GMing is that the most important thing is that everyone at the table is having fun. So if everyone had good time, it wasn't terrible GMing.

>>50273223
Almost causing a tpk every session, complete refusal to work with any of us, and his batshit insane lengthy spell descriptions were why we dropped him.

It was fine at first but he was unbearably bad and after a while it starts ruining the fun for everyone else.

One time I invited a kid who I thought was really smart but turned out to be a dick to swords & wizardry.

three choices for class, which also is race
>I want to be a wooden robot
alright, sure, let's fluff your character a robot, but you need to pick one of the three for mechanical reasons
>I want him to be cylinder-shaped, with a single cannon in the chest.
N... No arms? Legs?
>no arms, legs are treads
there's stairs in the dungeon
>don't care
you... 50% chance of toppling?
>yeah let's do it
enters dungeon, topples, nobody can lift him back up because of self-declared immense weight

session ended there, wasn't invited back

writes an alt-right blog last i heard

>>50270400
It's a good way to get a measure for how you think. And maybe gives him an idea of what he'll want to disallow in game.

Could be he was just a berk, though.

>>50275046
Some Players really suck at chargen, and a DM might figure instead of derailing the session every time somebody eats it, or making some poor sap sit at the table twiddling his dick for eight hours, just send the guy home and work on the new character later.

>fighting an evil cult that stitches horrible abominations together
>one is a huge stalker type with large glass orbs for eyes
>we know the orbs provide sight and hearing to our enemies, as well as location
>they also explode when triggered by cult
>'friend' puts 2 in his backpack to try to 'reverse engineer'
>was somehow butthurt when he died
this was the character's second session (but the first was mostly introductory as he brought this character in after his last one died.)

>>50270531
The best friend/worst player is a painful universal law. Mine did a deathworld milf assassin prostitute for a DH game and the fishiest malk ever for a oWoD game.

>>50269086

>DM for 3.5 game with usual group
>All of our games are too easy imo so I decide to break that trend by upping the difficulty to present a challenge
>Over arching plot is pretty standard high fantasy stuff, the party has to collect a series of Mcguffins from progressively harder dungeons to defeat a big boss while simultaneously going from nation to nation recruiting allies for big war
this was a long time a go so the specifics are blurry, but bare with me.
>Party must have been relatively mid - high level, and everyone in the group is pretty much a power gamer.
>They enter one of the aforementioned dungeons, which are huge and the intent is for rests to be taken in safe spots in the dungeon.
>nothoweroll.jpg
>Party makes its way to the first dungeon boss with no losses and fights a hydra.
>They kill the Hydra and see a door on the other side of the room
>Meta gaming rogue assumes the door is an exit and doesn't check for traps
its not an exit and it is trapped
>Has craziest contact poison out of Book of Vile Darkness on the handle.
>Rogue takes way more con damage than he can handle and drops dead... but the door is open.
>In the meantime a new player was creating a character, was going to do bard but decides to do rogue given the circumstances.
>Makes the adjustments and is ready to go in short order.
>Character intro in a dungeon in the middle of fuck all nowhere fml
>Mean while the party has entered the labyrinth
>Decide new rogue was frozen in magical ice in the maze, gets thawed out and decides to hang out with the party
>Group decide to send tank and new rogue off in different directions at an intersection
>New rogue finds a magical flame trap, fails to disable it, but makes his reflex save. No damage
>In game the party hear *Shwoosh* "Im okay"
>On the way back the rogue figures out the trap auto reset but decides not to disable and just dodge again
>In Game: Swoosh.... silence
>Failed reflex save. Dies of massive damage.

>>50278557
In Hackmaster 4E you can die while rolling on the advanced training tables in character gen. They're an optional part of chargen which is meant to cover things like who your fighter fought with/against to get to level 1, where you mage/cleric studied, or what your thief's mentor was like. As a fighter you can die from a training accident or in the field during a battle. Thieves can get imprisoned and executed. I believe clerics and mages can flunk out of their schooling, which is effectively death in character creation.

>>50269086
I played a summoner mage in 4e, I thought it was a good idea to dimension door over to a pirate ship and make a wall across it, they ended up just climbing over the wall with ease

>>50269086
I was running a high level one shot that was more meant to just dick around and explore the system than anything else. Describe the party meeting each other in a field where a great battle had just taken place between some extraplanar forces. Some of them ask if they can loot the remains. Most of the really good stuff had already been taken but they find some valuable things still lying around including a few +2 swords. These are not significant to them considering the level of this oneshot, but a couple of the players really want them. First guy calls dibs. Second guy calls dibs. First guy pulls a bag of holding and leans over a portable hole in front of him, threatening to kill himself and everyone else if the doesn't get the +2 swords. Second guy not only calls his bluff, but pushes him into the portable hole with the bag of holding. Entire party died a couple minutes into starting the one shot. I just retconned it though and we kept playing.

>>50269086
>DMing D20 modern campaign
>new player
>rolls up a pilot
> goes on about how his player is a manic daredevil
>session starts
>party's CIA contact gives them a mastercrafted Blackhawk
>"Infiltrate and disable this enemy aircraft carrier"
>team decides that by broadcasting an enemy signal they can get close enough to the carrier to deploy
>flycasual.jpg
>new player brings the helicopter behind the carrier
>hailed by the tower
>face rolls bluff
>nat 1
>Pilot rolls to dodge AA fire
>nat 1
>pilot rolls to safely land on carrier deck
>nat 1
>switches dice
>Helicopter is on fire at this point and is on a collision course with the tower
>party rolls reflex saves
>makes them all
>except for the pilot
>nat 1
>crashes the heli into the tower, setting off the spare fuel tanks and rocket pods in the process
>starts a chain reaction that is about to destroy the carrier
>rolls massive damage save
>nat 1

He never came back after that session and I don't know why.

>>50280183
Mabe he undertook a journey during which he became the world's greatest Yahtzee player.

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>>50269086
>...this was supposed to be a seven hour session, I got 15 minutes then "yeah bye" due to a fucking rat mob.

... do ho ho, well done sir.

>>50278557
The game designers of Traveler (2?) realized that certain results on their random table made characters that weren't any fun to play. Instead of rewriting the table they just took out all the results they didn't like and replaced them with "you die".

>>50280183
I know this guy...it's stork from Happy jacks RPG podcast

>>50278384
I really don't know why DMs try to have intentionally broken games if they don't plan to have equally broken shit as a counter.

>D&D 3.5, level 15
>DM allows us to take any class/template we want, as long as it's from WotC
>I end up with a Fire-Souled Magic-Blooded Pixie Saint, with only LA-2 somehow by DM logic
>Bard, Marshal, like 5 other classes to end up with stupid bonuses to perform.
>Ended up with +50 in every perform, and+90 to Bluff
>Literally every NPC that exists has to believe even the most ridiculous lies I say, and just speaking to them makes them regard me as their greatest ally.
>DM tries to throw some deaf enemies at me so I couldn't talk to them
>Bitches don't know about my Perform:Dance
>Anything that wasn't mindless, I diplomacied, and everything that /was/ mindless didn't have a shot at finding an invisible bard.
>There was no session 2.

>>50280514
I doubt it was him, mostly because I don't think he goes to my college

>>50269086
Session 2. Played once a week with this group and finished a lengthy campaign recently. We switched up GMs for a change of pace and it was this guy's first time running a game, but he was a long time player.

Anyway, is be pretty excited about this character, but the GM threw us into a fight we totally could not win and we were expected to run from; none of us did and it ended up being a TPK. We talked about it and decided to run a do over next week where the fight was a lot more fair and we weren't expected to run from it.

>>50270842
>>50270764
>>50270531
>if you don't me you'll be fired

I imagine him suggesting he's going to "fire" the guy, not actually get the guy fired. I wasn't there but this sounds like a perfectly reasonable threat.

>>50269086
We started the campaign traveling on a ship. The sailors tried to rob us in the opening scene and the bard tried to put them to sleep with a spell. They shot him, and then half the party died.
11/10 game

>>50269086
> Dark sun, 4th ed.
> Warrior charges.
> Miss.
> Monster A crit.
> Monster B crit.
Not even a full round. Then we got to optimize.

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>>50278174
Only one. Although that's a good question.
His depth perception is awful, so he's a terrible shot. That makes him an interesting duo with his deaf dad.

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>playing 3.5 campaign
>friend rolls a new character cause he didn't wanna play his super racist dwarf anymore
>makes a pirate-like character
>keeps asking us in character if we like his clothes that he picked out
>"fuck off piratefag"
>"do you like my hat?"
>wants to escort us to his ship so we can continue our quest
>seems good
>get to this giant chasm where we need escorted through
>long journey
>protected by our hired body guards from dinosaurs, weird beasts, etc.
>friend playing pirate starts getting really tired cause its like 5am and we started at midnight
>starts roleplaying like he is going crazy
>this goes on for hours
>run into a basilisk
>all stealthy walk by it
>he sprints up to it
>"DO YOU LIKE MY FUCKING HAT?"
>shoots his gun and misses it by a mile
>turns into stone basically instantly

PC's who last only part of a session are great

>>50278350
Holy shit thats hilarious

>>50270531
That gif is fucking incredible. Giggling like a madman over here.

>>50275373
Truly, a dwarf to be remembered.

>>50281641
Happy end!

>>50269086
First legit 3.5 campaign I ran, sandbox style.
>PCs have a few minor adventures. Doden, farmer turned warrior, has now saved a blacksmith's daughter and a gemcutter's son from goblin kidnappers.
>Plus an admirable win in the local arena. Good winnings for the homestead, but gained a petty and spiteful enemy.
>New foe tried to torch Doden's farm at night while family is sleeping and Doden is railing his wife. They kill him without mercy, bucket-brigade to save the farm. Doden claims enemy's bow and helmet.
>Now PCs follow hook to hunt prized game for upcoming bible's feast. Dire Boars are the chosen game.
>Much tracking, So Survival! They find a herd.
>Doden takes a surprise action to snipe a boar with fallen enemy's bow.
>1
>1
>1
>random roll: instant death.
>Doden ends career suddenly as poorly-maintained bow snaps in his hand and top half and gets sent directly through eye and into brain. Only way I could rule it.
>Player rolls up adopted member of the clan, they eventually become a fixture of that city until it's inevitable death by zombie plague, since they ignored that plot hook but turned their eyes to grander adventures and left city alone for many, many months.
I really like my players and how they don't take things so seriously.

>>50269086
>Welcome to Level 1.
>You can learn 1 new spell.
>The Mean-Looking Mercenary hits you.
>The Mean-Looking Mercenary hits you.
>"My God, it's full of stars!"
>You die.
>Dump the screen? (y/n)?

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>>50269086
I played in a game where our characters each were recruited by an organization that served some god to better the world. I created a born-again christian. He refused to believe this god was real, so in his recruitment scene he was given a heart attack.

>>50269086
In a lengthy Call of Cthulhu campaign another player introduced a replacement character. The new character met the party, asked about a magical mask, put on the mask, Saw Some Shit gaining d100 insanity, immediately went insane and exited the campaign.

>>50283555
> I created a born-again christian.
Is that some kind of christian-kin?
Is that what happens when you mix bigots and Tumblr?

>>50275061
Well, to be fair it's not like he expected me to have such shit rolls. Also in the end I insisted that the outcome not be fudged since it was my stupidity that got me there in the first place.

>>50275415
That's just bad GMing. That grenade could have gone anywhere it didn't have to kill them.

>>50278453
Meh you arent the one who rolled 4 ones on a d20 in a row.

>>50284260
Mixing bigots and tumblr is just social justice warriors anon.

>>50269086
>kicked younger brother awake, snapped his neck by accident
>first roll of the session was a 1.

>>50269086
>Level 1 3.5 Wizard in a solo adventure
>Get a distress message from an alchemist that my character knows
>Go to his magical lab, he's nowhere to be found, but there's a magic mirror leading to somewhere else
>Notice a treasure chest in the corner of the lab
>Maybe something useful in the chest?
>Open chest
>Dart trap, deals 1d4+1 damage, max damage, 5 damage. Go unconscious, only had 4 HP
>Fail Fort vs. Poison, more damage.
>Fail secondary save, more damage.
>Dead less than 10 minutes into first session.
Oops.

>>50269086
>VtM game, other layers are acting like murder hobos in a political game.
>character deaths every session.
>one of the players keeps on making new characters to take revenge on the NPC that killed his last character.
>latest character death was at the hands of the princer.
>he pays the storyteller to give him more freebie points, and to let him buy down to 7th generation.
>character is a celerity 6 monster. We object, and the ST points out his characters never last a session.
>sure enough five minutes in, and he gets butchered.
>superhuman speed isn't that useful if somone is using telekinesis to hold you in mid air.

>>50280796
>boss gives you orders to never speak about the classified stuff or you lose your job
>random guy tells you if you don't go against your boss, you'll lose your job

Anon, no.

>joined a game planning a crafting oriented merchant character so I could take it easy during mid-game combat, wasn't built for anything crazy
>first session, spent my time helping the party in and out of combat, was generally the only one engaged in roleplaying since everyone but me dumped charisma
>party sets up camp after a few encounters on the road, almost everything I own and the thing we were out there to get is stolen in the night by ghosts, literally
>DM gives some vague hints for the party to follow to recover the stolen goods, then throws an adolescent dragon and a posse of trolls at the level 3 party when those hints are followed
>DM favors targeting me over other party members despite my lack of a weapon and armor, I end up being the only casualty, as the party is forced to flee, and the DM spends a few moments to describe the desecration of my character's corpse

I dropped that game hard.

>>50269086
>join DH game
>some retarded mega-hybrid of 40k, Starcraft, Alien v Predator and D&D
>stay because I thought it would fun from a "watching three legged mutants trying to dance" perspective
>GM runs me through an intro session
>insist on rolling for absolutely everything
>rolls an encounter for me versus 6 fully armed and armored human enemies when I'm merely a rank 1 arbitrator
>die 30 minutes into the goddamn intro, five days away from the actual game

How I managed to thank him and leave with "this doesn't look like my scene" instead of repeating four letter words, baffles me to this day.

>>50288950
He meant "fire" as in, light on fire (or perhaps fire a gun, or fire him out of a cannon, or the airlock or something of that nature). That's why the second was in quotations, a double entendre

>>50289466
It doesn't work that in the language we were playing the game, but I could probably see it working in English.

>>50284260
Nah, born-again christians are the "praise Jeeeesus, CAN I GET AN AYYYYYMEN" bible basher type kind. At least where I come from.

>>50289505
>It doesn't work that in the language we were playing the game
Oh I see, my mistake then.

> I could probably see it working in English.
Yes, English is wonderfully, and at times woefully, ambiguous like that.

>playing incredibly simple lotr homebrew for some new players
>it's the DM's first time doing it too
>" you're all gathered in the Inn of the prancing pony... "
>bored out of my mind with the railroading and handholding that's ufolding
>FINALLY get control of my character, annalcoholic Dwarven wrestler, after 35 minutes of WORDSEORDSWORDS.
>start a tavern brawl because of the extortionate ale price, make 3 poor rolls and get glassed across my neck.
>"dead dwarves twin brother walks in!"

No fuck you I'm dead I don't want to play this shit

>>50281641
but was the hat nice?

My Changeling was killed during the third session as a result of pvp, immediately ending the session and derailing the campaign, eventually leading to its demise. The party encountered a Privateer in the hedge, I tried to kill him (as you do with privateers) but because he gave us some quest advice suddenly the rest of the party decided he was more important than I was and turned on me.

>>50278809
Love it

>>50281033
>open rolling in a nutshell

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>>50269086
>3 player + GM ongoing campaign
>1 player who we'll call "that guy" lets us know the day of that he can't make it to the session
>Rest of us decide to have a little 2-man session. GM spends the entire day working on the setting, hooks, and a kind of branching storyline revolved around us being upcoming monster hunters
>Hour before we start, that guy calls and says he can make it and that we need to pick him up. Because he can't pay for gas. All of us go over and pick him up.
>In the car, GM explains that he has been working on this new setting the entire day and would really like to GM it. That guy starts bitching saying he wants to play the original campaign. GM relents but is clearly disappointed. I argue for the new setting and other player agrees, so GM says that it's 2-1 so he'll run the new setting.
>We do 3d6 down the line for chargen and just make a quick backstory. I get decent int and really low cha and make something like pic related. 2nd player makes a dwarf fighter and that guy makes a dragonborn warlock. After we're finished GM asks us to give him our personality, ideals, etc. Dwarf and I have standard ones considering we made chars on the spot. That guy has the words "Fuck it" in each section.
>Ow my edge
>GM is clearly unhappy, like has an expression I never saw on him before, but we proceed
>Standard introduction - that guy being shitty but nothing too notable. We start our first quest - to kill some giant rats plaguing a farm. During the encounter, that guy doesn't cast a single spell and the dwarf gets diseased by a rat bite. None of us think too much of it and take a short rest. GM says the dwarf dies of the disease.
>GM proceeds to nuke the entire campaign.

And that's how my entire party died in less than 20 minutes to a GM that never had a player character death.

>>50289842
>That Guy says he can make it
>we know he's That Guy
>"sorry, man, you said you couldn't so we cancelled the today's session and all have other plans. see ya next week."
>proceed to have a nice 2-man session without That Guy

was is so hard?

>>50283445
>characters insta-die because they roll poorly three times in a row
I still do not see what's so funny about this desu senpai

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>>50269086
>DnD 5e
>GM encourages creating characters that add to the setting
>Create an entire country, religion, and culture for my character
>Become the most important driving force for plot progression in the party
>Big boss battle at the end of our second session
>Enemy barbarian henchman got explicit orders to go after my character
>Fast forward to me rolling Death Saves while the barbarian is on his last leg
>A slight breeze could kill him at this point
>Party Fighter figures out it's better to try to drag me away instead of dealing the 1 damage that would garanteed kill the barbarian
>Barbarian's turn after the Fighter
>Goes up to me and finishes the job

>New character next session
>Start in the middle of another combat encounter
>Die on the second turn before I can do more than one action

>>50288284
That sucks

>>50289230
This happened to me aswell, except the system wasn't DH.

In the session 0, the GM set the group in a pretty one-sided battle scenario and all we could do was watch as our characters were butchered by a combination of magical beasties and very disadvantegeous terrain.

>>50289720
If everyone else in the group is against you, you might be That guy. Were you That guy, anon?

>>50289932
It was my opinion that there was some metagaming going on, because I was doing it stealthily while everyone was asleep and the other player who caught me waits until AFTER I declare my intentions to say "I only pretend to go to sleep". Also its changeling, and the privateer was very forthcoming about his history as a slaver. It wasn't exactly an unpredictable response.

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>>50278809

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>>50269086
My first campaign, in my first ever combat in a TTRPG, the first attack the enemy makes...they one shot my prissy elf sorcerer with a crit

it wasn't a very good campaign

>>50289959
Open rolling campaigns rarely are

>>50289966
>Open rolling
May I ask what this term means?

Start a dark heresy campaign, about 5 mins in the party psycher perils and a blood letter rips out into the material world. Total party wipe. 5 mins in.

The DM was quick thinking and says that we were watching a vid of the previous acolyte team and our journey began from there

>>50289680
If you have to ask, the answer is no. Quite universal really.

>>50289979
It's when the GM lets the players see what he rolls. It generally doesn't go too well, because it might happen that he rolls really well or really poorly, to the chagrin of the players

>>50269086
Dark Heresy

Made a Psyker intended to only rarely use his powers. Inquisitor shows up to recruit me, tells me to prove I am a psyker and can control my power. Uses some minor power. Roll psychic phenomenon, rolled too high and ended up on another table, and got zipped into the Warp.

GM let me just reuse the same stats and everything. I still rerolled into a Scum instead, because fuck this shit.

>>50290037
Oh I see, thank you for the explanation.

>DnD5e
>First session
>A rogue, a sorceresss, a barbarian, and a monk walk into a cave, all are lvl1
>it's goblin time!
>TPK 2 turns in
>EVERYONE fails their stabilise rolls
Our party (unwillingly) roleplayed the newbie party from Goblin Slayer.

We rolled new characters and got killed by rats in the sewers on our second session.

Never played DnD again.

>>50278557
Honestly, it mostly happens if you want it to, and not because you rolled badly.

It's a failsafe. It is similar to how, if you roll for stats in d&d, you risk getting a character with no stat above 8. This is sorta the same, except it let's you kill your character and start over, instead of trying to play with a completely useless mess of a character.

>>50290093
You're welcome. I would encourage your GM to use a GM screen, btw. To avoid thia sort of situation

>>50290096
Sorry to learn that you had one terrible GM that put you off anon

>>50290096
>Bad GM detected
Even with open rolls, you improvise out of it.

Maybe the goblins keep you alive for a ransom or because need need more respected humanoids for a task (and thus saves your lives).

Maybe you die, but a divine or unholy higher power brings you back with a purpose, which helps move the plot forward.

Maybe you die, and their kids who up to avenge then, and this is what brings them into the adventuring life.

I can keep going. If you can't figure out how to proceed from here, you are a bad and inexperienced GM, and really should consult some GMs with more experience than you. You really need it.

>>50289871
>funny
If you look, you will find that word was not mentioned in the OP. Just fastest death. I kinda wish it was funny, at the table it was just kinda sad.

>>50290136
I second that it's often way better to somehow obscure or not show your rolls. My players think that "GM screens are for faggots" so I don't use one, but I suffer from a condition where I roll far too well for the enemies. It's D&D and we have a rule where, if someone rolls 20 thrice in a roll when attacking, its an insta-kill regardless of whatever spell/magical items/bullshit the target had that could prevent that attack from hitting.

My players never got to be that lucky with rolls, but I have already done so 4 times as of today. That's how, among other things, a wizard stacked on protection spells flying almost out of range got sniped down by a CR1 goblin. It's so ridiculous I would have liked to fudge those rolls, but oh well.

>>50290184
Sorry, I didn't really make myself understood there.

What I meant to say was "I don't understand why people find that entertaining"

>>50290193
There are more demand in GMs. If they think you are a faggot for hiding your rolls, tell them to go suck their own dick and find another GM.

>>50290193
Different strokes for different people. If your players are masochistic degenerates, who don't mind re-rolling characters during sessions and they do not care about solid character advancement or involvement with the plot, I will just call their taste shit and be done with it.

Playing a light hearted d20 modern game set during WW2. I'm playing a Russian that's sneaking into Germany to help Jews escape, friend is playing a German soldier that's secretly part of the resistance. First session is mainly just me making rolls to sneak and not get shitfaced on vodka, the three of us are all laughing at all of the terrible accents we're doing. Friend decides to gather some intelligence by volunteering to help around Doctor von Nazi's Nazi Doom Castle. Someone tells him to carry a crate downstairs, he fails a strength roll at the stairs. Fails a second. Fails an acrobatics roll. Fails a save. Before we even got the party together, he died. By having a crate fall on top of him on the stairs. This is why the Germans lost the war.

>>50290138
>>50290141
That GM was not even terrible, we played a lot of games together before, we still do actually.
We just had a disastrous combination of bad rolls, slight miscommunication, being new to the system, and amazing npc luck. Twice.

>>50290204
Kek, that's a fairly good solution indeed. If we weren't good friends I wouldn't keep up with some of the shit they pull sometimes, but mostly they're pretty chill.
Nowadays I just deal with the issue by rolling slightly out of their line of sight.

>>50290214
I won't disagree that some of them have a really shitty taste, you're absolutely right. But at least out of these 4 instakills only 2 got rerolls out of them, because ressurection spells.
Still, it was indeed painful having to readjust the story to fit in the new characters, back when they still didn't have access to that kind of magic.

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>>50269086
>see thread
>HP, armor etc...
>mfw when I only play Delta Green, Godlike and Unknown Armies where a swift death is the best you can hope for

>>50290235
>GM making him roll those checks
Jesus, why? Unless the doom castle was actively being shelled, WHY

>>50290463
I don't even know what was in the crate, but the first check was to see if he could carry it down the stairs. He failed, the DM let him try to grab it again and he failed, then he failed to get out of the crate's way, and yeah. It was a few years ago so I'm fuzzy on the details, I just remember it being a silly little thing we did one day to pass the time.

>>50269086
1 / 4
> GMing the dark eye
> Heroes and Players struggle through a hard campaign
> seafaring voyage to the mysterious southern continent
> Campaign runs for over a year
> regularly like clockwork friday nights deep into the night
> mostly even into early saturday Morning or saturday lunchtime
> every other week or so we manage to have a game on Sundays, too

Brilliant times, good players, and I reallay did invest some preptime into the campaign.
Now, for larger combat encounters in the dark eye, or in general, I have a rule:
1) Each Combat should be telegraphed
2) Given sufficient work and dedication, combat should always be avoidable
3) Combat is usually a fail-state in the dark eye - you want to avoid it, as it can be deadly

In my style of GMing, I do not tailor encounters to the party - I tailor them to the world.
For strong and experienced Heroes this means, there are easy combat encounters which they will be able to identify,
but there will also be hard or even insurmountable combat encounters, which they will be able to identify,

I detest "springing a trap" on my players ala "LOL you just ran into a Dragons Cave, guess you gonna die, amirite?"

I want the players - and heroes - to have a feel for any larger encounter,
I want them to gain an understanding of how such an encounter will go.
this is important to keep in Mind.

>>50290772
2 / 4
Enter the Guereni,
> Giant Whiteback Ape
> Magically Powered
> Entire Group would be hard pressed at best to survive an encounter.

So I don't throw them in, instead, they learn of the Guereni Whiteback during their journey south:
> Panther Archipelago Locals have Story of Giant Whiteback Apes called "Guereni",
> Heroes discover one of them calls a volcanic Island in the Archipelago his home
> by some bad decision making the heroes decide to confront the monster
> they (rightfully) assume that his eyes hold strong magic
Encounter #1: A YOUNG Guereni Whiteback, not full combat and physical stats, only half strength magically.
the players engage him on their terms, one player almost dies, then some lucky rolls unfurl,
> Guereni Whiteback Youngster is killed after 20 rounds of grueling combat
> Almost tpk

>>50290778

3 / 4
Later:
Encounter #2: An OLD grown Guereni Whiteback, Full Combat and Physical stats, however, NO Magic
> Group is now on the continent
> Enters an old Sungod temple
> theres an anti-Magic Zone
> they know there's a Guereni in there
> they know it's all grown up
> they know it doesn't have magic in there
> they take 20 norse warriors
> decide to take it down to open up the temple for research purposes
> Engage the full grown Old Whiteback Guereni
> 14 out of 20 norse warriors die a heroes death
> 3 out of 6 PCs go into negative Life
> Manage to bring it down.

even later
Encounter #3 should be a fully grown ( albeit: not an old one ) Guereni Whiteback
Heroes had gathered more experience, had gotten better at fighting
was supposed to be a voluntary Arena match
> PCs could watch the Guereni fight some other creatures
> would be able to enter arena at their leisure
> One Guy goes Full that Guy
> Antagonizes powerful NPCs
> is threatened with the arena as punishment
> exclaims: "whatever you throw at me I can handle"
> NPC goes: "okay, howabout a whiteback giant guereni ape? "
> entire group urges him: NO don't do it
> everybody screams for him to BACK DOWN

>>50290794
3 / 4
> this makes him want to fight
> that guy demands to fight the whiteback giant ape
> 1 round of combat in he is dead
30 minutes into the session.
Character Death no1. the next 20 Minutes the following happens:
> other player, playing a noble Aztec like Warrior adhering to a crazy death cult
> feels his character would be honour bound to also try his luck in the arena
> sands are still bloody, body of the first fallen Hero maimed and crushed laying there
> Player declares " I can probably dodge all the attacks coming in from the Whiteback, do an action of Orienting and get in one strike every round of combat "
> or so he thinks
> round 1, Guereni crits 3 times, player has to make insane dodges, goes to ground, loses Initiative
> round 2, player is faced with the option of tanking a hit of the Whiteback - or - to keep on dodging until he hits initiative zero and is unable to act
> Guereni keeps critting
> round 3, noble-stupid Aztec death-cultist: DEAD

Comes the third player
> " I can do it. My Elf can conjur up some illusions as distractions and kill the Whiteback with arrows before the whiteback reaches me. "
> jumps into the arena sands, two fallen comrades already there
> turns out he severely underestimated his own abilities as well as the Whitebacks speed.
> 2 rounds of combat later he is dead.

Comes the fourth player. At this point everybody is in a grim state of disbelief, really disgruntled... except for that guy. He seems dedicated to kill that beast
> Jumps into the Arena
> throws his deadliest magic at the guereni
> rolls badly
> Whiteback rolls well
> 1 round of combat later the Wizard is dead.
...

>>50290772
>>50290778
>>50290794
>>50290806
And that's how a Guereni Whiteback killed 4 ( four ! ) Player Characters within 30 Minutes Gametime, and how 4 out of 6 Heroes who had survived more than a year of outtime reallife playing time died within 1 hour of Sessions begin.

Later there was a Encounter #4, the final Guereni Encounter versus an Ancient Whiteback Ape. the Players had recognized his strengths and weaknesses, decided to slay it even though they didn't really need to, played the monster for a fool, exposed him to his personal cryptonite, poisoned him, trapped and starved him until finally confronting him
> entire party
> engages Ancient Guereni Whiteback
> Combat lasts 4 rounds
> they abso-fucking-lutely destroy it

Was Brilliant. 3 Years later, to this day, we laugh about the Arena incident where 4 People died within half an hour :D

> DMing a campaign
> Dude makes a Pathfinder Sorcerer and has one especially high left over roll that he decides will be STR
> 1st fight 1st round he casts magic missles
> 2nd round he run up to melee and punches the mob
> Get's attacked, critical hit one shot...

Lasted an entire 2 mins

>>50290193

I always use a screen then randomly roll d20s every now and then. The silence every time I roll a D20 and I don't say anything about it.

>>50269086
>running Rogue Trader.
>Guy makes a Void Master
>twenty minutes in he gets insulted by a noble and thus challenged the guy to a duel.
>Noble accepts.
>they go outside and draw on each other.
>noble scores enough degree of success to deal 2d10 extra damage on his archaeotech las pistol and Insta-kills the Void Master.
>Player decides not to burn fate to survive because "if I died in the first twenty minutes the character is probably not meant to survive"

>doing a homebrew where magic use is akin to psykers in Warhammer, high risk random reward.
> party is fighting its mob, rusted mechanoids
> warlock decides to try and summon a lesser daemon
>natural 1 for preparation
>natural 1 for execution
>Natural 1 for attempted cancel
>nails the roll to dodge the summoning explosions, everyone else rolls badly
> party is knocked back as a mighty uncontrolled demon is summoned.
> warlock fails a will save and his Mortal soul is ripped from his flesh.
>paladin casts banish Demon, succeeds and the warlocks soul is gone
>party has no initiative, mechanoids mop them up

These are the best games to be honest

>>50291198
I wouldn't call a game in which the players TPK the first session "good" but that's just me talking from a player's perspective

>>50291612
There's a time and a place for serious long campaigns, but that was designed to be a short one shot anyway

Playing Only War friend of mine rolls a psyker. We get on boarding torpedoes and attack a Tau ship. First round he walks out of the ship and a fire warrior on Overwatch takes a shot at him. 24 points of plasma damage later he exits the game and says thet he will come back next game.
Total lifetime: 5 sec.

<playing Only War
<roll a psyker
<fighting against Tau
<first round of combat Tau beats us on initiative
<random Tau shoots me with his plasma
<deals 28 damage
<I have 8 hp
<Explode with all of my grenades

>>50290197
Basically the rationale boils down to
>it keeps things interesting because predictable games are boring.
I and my players find the game more exciting if the dice can just kill a character suddenly. Its not like we even play high lethality games, we just use a variant rule where triple natural 1s on a combat roll is instant death, which is a 1 in 8000 chance, and the story I told is the only time it's actually come up in my games.

>>50292379
what is this
did you critfail?
> greentext
> wat do
> how to

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2MB, 400x225px

>>50269086
Might not count because he didn't really die, but I'll share the story of James regardless

> Party member dies in dungeon
> Spends rest of dungeon building new character, James
> Rest of party finds and rescue James from a dungeon
> James asks to come with us
> We gladly accept our new brother in arms
> I jokingly tell the Paladin to detect evil
> DM casually asks for Jame's alignment
> James is evil
> DM and party is speechless
> We ask him to leave peacefully and immediately or we WILL kill him
> He leaves
> Never seen again

Five minutes play time, still brought up to this day as one of the most infamous characters ever created in our group. I don't even know what the fuck his class was. He didn't even keep the same build or anything, started a new guy from scratch after that.

>>50269086
>playing dnd 3rd edition
>DM is brutal, characters die left and right
>after a dude dies DM lets us build a new character and jump right back in, new characters get to buy magic items based on the level/gold chart in DMG
>bad string of luck one night, character I had managed to keep alive for three sessions (a real achievement with this DM) dies early because of stupid shit another player did
>frustrated but make new character and get going
>bad rolls, dude's dead a couple encounters later
>aggrevated make another, same shit
>fourth character of night, name him Marf Meti and buy a bunch of gear the rest of the group needs and let the fucker die in the next fight
>DM pissed that I just used this guy to get everyone else some gear, restricts me heavily on the next dude
>decide fuck it I'll just piss him off
>make a cleric and name him Jesus of Nazareth and buy him a ring of water walking
>walk in to the next room in dungeon and say to the group "Hi, my name is Jesus can I join your...."
>the barbarian in the group just laughs and attacks me, fucking crazy crit and kills me in one hit
>DM calls it for the night
>6 hour session I lost 5 characters, the last one didn't even make it through his intro.

>>50292463
As long as you and your players are on the same page, that's okay.

>>50269086
>Make a rogue for a pirate game
>A ship approaches, literally the first thing the GM says
>I draw my blunderbuss and fire
>Accidentally hit the powder keg and blow up the whole ship, first round of combat
My very first session of my very first game, lived every minute of it.

>>50292379
>nat 1 greentext

>>50294935
Loved*

>>50274126

I think it was cast on the robot, and the head got crushed, with the pilot inside.

>>50294949
No, I think lived is pretty appropriate for that scenario.

>>50278350
>naked anime tiddies

MODS

>B/X
>Meet in Tavern
>after greeting each other, DM has 4 orcs attack our six party members.
>I am a fighter, so I wade in with my longsword
>Orcs launch arrows
>3 aimed at me
>All hit

Died in five minutes.