That DM Thread

>>50143139
stop whiteknighting for some other guy's girl faggot

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Obligatory.

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>>50144708

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>>50143139
Damn son. Better call the cops on them before he starts beating them where the bruises can be seen.

My ThatDM:
>ask DM how much backstory he wants
>"as much as you want my dude"
>write two pages, condence it to five paragraphs
>"that's not enough my dude"
>give him the two pages, says it's okay
>game starts with us being attacked by assassins
>everyone dies and gets handed out sheets with our "real" characters
>mfw

>>50144769
Damn...that actually hurt me

>>50144769
hahahhaha

i'd just leave

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>>50143139
>Be forever DM
>play a lot of dnd and RECON with some new guys
>one friend is in school 4 hours away and wants to commute every weekend to play
>whatever but I'm not dming every weekend
>Black Crusade gets brought up and starts with 3 people
>I get to play
>build a techpriest and deck him out to provide covering fire and deal with a lot of not combat
>everyone else is marines
>first game comes around and im the only one who read the book
>everyone looks to me when they ask if they can do something
>no one knows their shit
>ROLL FOR EVERYTHING
>roll to see if we ask nice enough
>roll to see an air vent
>roll to see if I notice a terminal right in front of me
>roll to not get scared of another player after he psykers something
>roll
>roll
>ROLL
>not even rolling the skill were rolling a base stat
>new gm starts adding more players
>no one knows what they are doing
>no one cares and is on their phone
>no one read the book
>gm tells us what we do and how
>we just roll

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>College board game club starts playing D&D campaign
>Pretty good, but there's a That Guy
>Everyone wants to play constantly, so start 4 more campaigns
>One I get roped into is DM'ed by That Guy
>It's Lost Mines of Phandelver
>He's played D&D a ton but can't DM worth anything
>At the end of 2nd session he throws a wish in after I'd left for the night, comrades wish we were level 20
>immediate fear, he's the DM that wants his players to brutally die
>instead of continuing any sort of narrative, we teleport into some random forest
>Some other dude gets a PC with Level 20, 30 strength, and a cavalcade of magic items
>He gives us stuff, our sorcerer gets Wand of Orcus, fails save, dies
>Ragequits before I can try to resurrect him as a Cleric with none of the components for high level spells
>After that, he pulls out a Deck of Many Things
>I commit honorable suicide to end the campaign, call drawing 9 cards and get the Donjon by the third

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>>50145098
>always speends 5 minutes describing something pointless like how the terminal browser looks
>"anon is standing guard watching the hall. You feel the bloodlust and hate coming from him."
>me "Im just standing there. More cold and impatient"
>"well, you stand there proud of your kills but ready for the next round of combat"
>me "Im trying to play a cold, goal based marine with hopes of captaining a starship"
>"okay, you stand there waiting eager for the next fight"
>more rolling
>me "I headed out for a smoke"
>friend comes out with me
>him "your a better dm than a player"
>finish smoke and head back inside
>still rolling loot after 7 minutes
>next combat and every one after I do nothing because gm.
>score a critical, but the dude dodges
>be at 2 wounds after facing a guardsmen
>"but they're from the inquisition lol you take another wound"

>>50145382
In my rage I forget that my tech preist had died because he didntknow how to hold on to a zip line.

>>50144937
We did. He's not allowed to DM ever again.

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>>50144769
Did you play with that GM before?

>>50146777
Yeah, but not with him on the GMs chair. He was a good player, but that stunt made us all evry sour of the idea of him ever getting the reigns again.

>>50143139

>Be new to group
>And new to system the group likes
>Trying to generate a character
>Have little idea what I'm doing, and being walked through by a different player.
>It's this weird/neat hybrid roll and point buy system, you basically make one roll, which tells you how many overall points you get and how much you can put in as a maximum to any one stat; the more points you get, the less the max is.
>I get a guy who is geared towards a jack of all trades sort of setup, and I start scribbling some stats down.
>Veteran player tells me I should put in a bit more into perception, maybe ding willpower and/or endurance a bit to get there. Ambushes are apparently deadly in this game and GM likes to have relatively low powered enemies dug in deep and hitting from the rear and all.
>He overhears this.
>Turns a weird shade of purple and starts literally shaking.
>How can you do this, he half hisses, half chokes out to the other guy, then starts shouting METAGAMING! METAGAMING! at the top of his lungs before stepping out of the room for several minutes, and then coming back and acting as if nothing had happened.

I've yet to actually play with him, and several guys I trust assure me he's a good GM, but that was something of a red flag.

>>50144769
I'd strike him down with all my hatred.
That shit is intoleratable.
>>50143139
This guy's a huge tool, but his GF should just tell him no. If she can't, there are bigger problems.

>>50147276
>Turns a weird shade of purple and starts literally shaking.
kek

a DMs GF I had was like this. she'd start yelling if you helped people out that were new with the system and didn't understand the rules, and would go red if someone revealed something about their character as a player. our backgrounds had to be super secret by her standards. she actually hit the DM when he mentioned something about her character. crazy unemployed bitch with too much time on her hands.

>>50143139
She's not gonna have sex with you dude.

>>50144769
>Cool
>>LEAVES
Do not stand for ass hattery, walk away and find something more productive and fun to do