PCs vs Guards

Well if that's how your party rolls then that's just how it is. They can do whatever they want as long as they know there will be consequences for their actions and the Dm actually enforces (reasonable) consequences and doesn't just let everything slide. While no fun allowed Dm is no good, overly permissive Dm is worse. Just like life there should be consequences, and then they have to deal with them. If you steal you may get caught. If you fight the guards you may die/get thrown in Jail. Etc.

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>>50137341

>Party consists of Magus, Sorcerer, Cavalier, Druid, and Barbarian.
>That Guy playing a CN catfolk Sorcerer
>Fat as fuck, extraordinarily obnoxious
>casts mostly Reduce Person and Enlarge Person
>Won't stop making dick jokes
>will spend all the party's money on pigeons unless stopped

>Introductory session
>go to defend a parishoners house from grave robbers
>Group goes to house
>guards let us through
>Catfolk jumps through window yelling “I’m going to rape you”
>Residents terrified
>asks the guards to help
>The sorcerer is now talking to the town guard
>sorcerer: "Aha, but I've clearly got animal magnetism. Ffffffffffffffff..."
>sorcerer stumbles around, drunkenly threatening guards with fire magic
>guard appears to be apathetic, tells sorcerer to wrap it up
>in a fit of rage the sorcerer confronts the guy
>ohshitniggerwhatareyoudoing.jpg
>throws his axe at him.
>of fucking course he misses
>have to run away from town
>everyone loading up into a wagon, but they don't see the sorcerer
>A gondola full of guards pass by
>Hilarious 30-40 minute Benny Hill-esque chase
>General confusion over what to do next
>Sorcerer finally shows up
>seconds later the sorcerer fucking fireballs them all to death, which results in the non-player guards to pincushion the idiot with crossbow bolts
>roasted
>Crowd begins vomiting
>The sorcerer then does something none of us really expected.
>The sorcerer is contacting some devil and rolls pretty well on his social checks
>Stunned silence all round the table, someone asks 'for god's sake WHY?'
>he rambles about how he got mouthfucked for nothing
>Magus (smug): "Would you like a Grease with that whine?"
>entire party loses it in laughter
>the sorcerer, unable to comprehend what he just witnessed, stares at me in confusion
>His frustration began to mount as my unblinking eyes started to water
>That Guy throws a fit, his face turns red with fury and storms out.
>mfw

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>>50137341
At low levels, the PCs that fuck up are usually up shit creek

At high levels, pic related happens

>>50137341
>party is at one of the top floors of an apartment buidling
>lights are out, their contact is dead and SWAT have been called by badguys
>they get warned they should surrender through megaphones and that a team is coming upwards
>they try escapong
>by going down the stairs the cops are coming
>then they start running upwards
>two of them decide to hide in one of the uninhabited apartments
>get spotted immediately, because they stood by the door, keeping it half open so they could peep at the action
>one tries to bluff that he is immortal and attacks them with a screwdriver
>dead in a single round
>other guy gets pulled out from under the bedsheets where he hid
>last two guys jumped from one roof to another after getting unbelievably lucky with the roll

Everyone had fun in the end. Yes, even the guy whose character died.

>>50137943
>will spend all the party's money on pigeons
I'm sorry but...what? really?

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>>50137341

>Dark Heresy
>Psycher goes to Arbites station to report being abused by the Arbites
>Head Arbite has him arrested
>Day of trial
>The Judge tells him that he is trialed for insurection, resisting arrest, sycophantic defemation and being a waste of space
>He accepts the charges
>Does not try to escape
>Gets executed
>mfw

>>50137341
My party has a charismatic rogue who likes to flirt her way out of trouble. They were in a Castle, returning the King and Queen's kidnapped daughter when our rogue breaks off from the party with the intention of sneaking into the treasure room and robbing them blind. She made it pretty far before getting caught and attempted to flirt and seduce the guard into helping her. I had her role a contested check, persuasion against perception, and then he began escorting her through the Castle... To a cell.

While the plan was just to leave her in the cell as a lesson, to be released once the party learned of what happened, she made matters worse by attempting to escape, assaulting another guard, and when that failed offering her services in exchange for release.

The session ended with the party being informed of her arrest, and a trial being set for the next day.

The next session began with a failed break-out attempt that resulted in the arrest of the rest of the party, with the exception of our Bard and Warlock (they hadn't been there the week before, so we said they was drunk and passed out in a tavern when all this went down).

The rest of the session was spent on the trial as our Bard represented them, to a spectacularly hilarious effect while our Warlock prepared a back-up plan. It was actually going very well but our Warlock mistook a nod from our Bard as a sign to go into action, and called forth her Patron with a Gate scroll (gifted to her previously by her Patron, who she also communed with earlier to barter for help) who caused a bit of chaos and destroyed a temple and a couple of small buildings until our party helped 'drive it back' in a bid to secure their freedom.

The Warlock is still paying in various ways for the events of that day and it's become a major plot point in the campaign.

>>50137341

This one group I used to play with, in about 6 games encompassing different systems, all had

>Commit some sort of crime, without doing much if anything to get away with it.
>Guards come and try to arrest them
>Someone in party attacks the guards
>More guards come
>Eventually, PCs are wiped out, as they inevitably don't stand down, try to flee, or actually do much of anything but stay in whatever street or square they were in and keep attacking anyone not in the party they see.

Then they congratulated me on my great worldbuilding and rolled up new idiots to do it again.

I eventually left the group because I felt like I was in a twilight zone episode.

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>play on some wierd ass homebrew system with our usual GM
>our party goes to a tavern
>our rouge tries to pickpocket things from the customeres
>does pretty well
>untill a one guy
>that guy had a fucking trap in his pocket
>cuts off the rouges hand (I think the GM got annoyed)
>guards are called in
>the rouge tries to resist arrest
>gets beat into the ground
>the guard ask us if we know him
>we say "hell no"
>we leave him in the city
>he dies in the custody
>mfw

That guy actually left us after this. I dont blame him really. I dont even know what got the GM so annoyed. When I asked him he said that "he did not like that guy"

This is what I do:

>Guards have Whistles/Bells/Signal horns
>When they get into an actual fight they start whistling/ringing/signaling
>Guards are almost entirely defensive based
>A trained guard is a level 3 warrior generally (meaning as a human he has 3 feats)
>Guards patrol in groups of 2-5
>When they begin signaling guards start fucking pouring in.

So last time this happened the following occurred.

>PCs got into a ballroom brawl
>guards (3 of them) came to break it up
>one of the PCs (level 4) shanked a guard
>the other guards started using signal horns
>the guards fight defensively and stick to the door, survive a few rounds
>6 more guards arrive
>PCs realize things aren't going their way, other patrons are running
>Hear that there are guards around the back as well when one of the patrons gets his head cracked
>Guards start beating patrons unconscious
>The PC who stabbed a guard gets hanged, the others get heavy fines which they can't pay
>The state confiscated their gear, and cuts out the wizard's tongue so he can't cast spells

>>50143309
It's from a mildly amusing /tg/ story.
Guy spent nearly all his starting cash on birds, commits to it, makes it work.
>Lolsorandumb! >IamSirBearingtonHenderson!
Continuing with dick jokes and joke chars after being asked to stop would be enough for me to not ask him back of not eject him.

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This is all well and good but whats the best kind of guards?
>Professional corps of knights, heavily armoured, dispensing royal justice
>Angry mob, pitchforks, torches, furious justice
>Mercenaries hired by the locals, well armed, good tactics, easily bribed justice
>Local militia, decently armed, largely made of ex soldiers, classic justice
pic related, /fa/ as fuck and largely ceremonial guards

>>50148444
Ranked from best first

1) Knight corps. There is something about fierce loyal arms that is unique in every setting.
2) Local militia. Many flavors, hard working honest men, their loyalty dependant on their personage and paycheck.
3) Angry mob. Kinda shitty regarding disposal of justice, but scariest of all. Especially if they are determined on tearing your legs off.
4) Mercenaries. Literaly murderhobos.

>DMing homebrew.
>Player wants to try out his animal magic.
>Wants to give his pony wings.
>Warn him that transformation magic is very volatile.
>Assures me he wants to do it
>ends up turning his pony inside out in the middle of a train station.
>Arrested for Reckless Magic, Offending the Public, and Interfering with Trade.
>slated for execution
>Calls for animal aid
>gets 7 cockroachs
>manages to leave cell
>Decides he's going to assault the guards with his "army" of cockroachs
>gets shot and bleeds out like a stupid asshoe

>>50148818
That is fantastic.

>>50148715
I often feel like knight corps need to be somewhat disconnected from reality, looking down on the peasants. I mean did these men of noble upbringing really expect to be stopping tavern brawls when they joined they swore fealty to the king?

>>50148818
Ok, those are some pretty light charges to warrant execution. A fine or prison time makes a lot more sense.

>>50148444
Here's another: Religious Zealots, whips, the world of god and holy justice

>>50146906
This is pretty epic, awesome warlock.

>>50151958
Animal Transformation magic has the capability of creating extremely dangerous monsters, it's sort of lIke building a bomb. He was also in a kingdom that places profit waaayyy above human life.

>>50137341
if it's a city of more than 2,000 people then thay shouldn't have any problem just walking in and out as thay please.

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>>50152763
>they shouldn't have any problem just walking in and out as thay please
>trying to walk by the front gate of the city after assault, robbery and murder of an officer of the law

>>50137943
Am I retarded? I couldn't really follow this

>>50152860
i guess it depends on if it's a game where it's trivially easy to fly, turn invisible or glamer

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>>50137341
>Bandits attack the carriage the party's hired to transport them.
>Driver runs and hides while the party deals with them, only for them to take the carriage afterwards.
>They also take one of the bandits hostage because the alchemist wants someone to test his potions on.
>Party leaves him tied up in their stolen carriage while they stop in a small village.
>He escapes.
>One of the town's guard's intervenes when they capture him again.
>They explain he's a bandit, guard thanks them for capturing him and asks them to hand him over for a reward.
>They refuse.
>Guard warns them that taking slaves is illegal.
>Party refuses to listen, and at one point throws the Gnome Berserker the owner of the bandit, and saying that they don't know eachother.
>Guard doesn't believe them, and because he's old and doesn't want to fight three murderhobos gives them one final warning before letting them 'go'.
>Party notices a horse bearing a guard ride back to the larger city they just came from that night, and decide to leave.
>Later, after a failed encounter with a pair of antlions in a magically conjured desert, they wake up to find themselves captured by bounty hunters after the price on their heads.

Ironically, they then proceeded to defeat the bounty hunters, taking two more hostages in the process but what they don't know/realize that they're going to have a hard time cashing in on their reward when they complete their current quest.

It'g good to see that RPGs train young people in the ways of the prophet.
Go get your virgins holy warriors!
Allahu Akbar! Allahu Akbar! Allahu Akbar! Allahu Akbar!

We had a guy who edglorded himself into a losing fight with the cops. it got to kind of sad to watch, in the train wreck you can't look away from sort of way.
So I brought down a building on him.

>>50137341
>PCs versus guards
Yeah that happens a lot in my campaign.

This would be less disturbing if the PCs were not in fact the town guard.

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>>50148444

Ex-soldiers that are well armed and armored is always my favorite: they make a credible threat to the PCs at early levels without running into the issue of being worth more than the land they're defending. Knights and paladins are for important cities and temples later down the line.

All this guard talk makes me want to play a town guard!