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Horse 2.0

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Thread replies: 98
Thread images: 19

File: Moose riding.jpg (76KB, 700x495px) Image search: [Google]
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A wizard has upgraded your horse to Horse 2.0. Horse 2.0 is larger, faster and better able to traverse water than Horse version 1.
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Who love you baby?
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>>49808297
Changelog.txt

Fixed issue with horse trying to rape players
Fixed issue with horse only outputting 0.74 horse power
Reinstated bare back riding ability
Removed talking horse ability due to balancing issues
Fixed centaur half human half horse hack
Fixed equipped horseshoes giving 4x luck to riders
Fixed hex hack of horse skin color, now no more rainbow horses
Reinstated horse in North American servers
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>>49809160
>Fixed equipped horseshoes giving 4x luck to riders
Fuck you, there goes my build.
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>>49809160
>No Horse Rape
>No rainbow Horses

Fuck that, to the glue factory with you!
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>>49808297
This looks fake as shit, but apparently it's possible to actually ride mooses. Meese.... Whatever the plural is.

It's just that warmooses... warmeese are not possible, because they get scared by loud things, so they're not very useful in modern times or times of war.
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>>49809160
>Fixed issue with horse trying to rape players
Why remove this feature? Rapehorse wasn't even a very good PvP build, it was just one of the more amusing ones.
Fucking nofun devs.
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>>49809160
>Fixed issue with horse trying to rape players
>Fixed
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>>49809160
>Reinstated horse in North American servers
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>>49809160

Devs, how are the horse skin cosmetic packs coming? I saw concept armour for a horse with antlers and I really want one.
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>>49809160
>Reinstated bare back riding ability
Aw yeah.
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>>49810351
Elves out!
REEEEEEEEE!
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>>49810440
Jezee, it'll just be cosmetics, its not like I want the devs to buff the charge attack. Im play to win not pay to win.
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>>49810485
I see his point. You guys have all that mounted archery stuff. Something for someone else would be nice.
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>>49810485
It will happen when the developers make the official rainbow horse cosmetic pack.
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>>49810512
Pastel pony mods when?
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>>49810232

Horses are scared by loud things

also plastic bags, fencing posts, rabbits, and anything new
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So does it also have 2 horsepower now? My previous steed had exactly 1.
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>>49810550
Yes.
But they can be trained not to. Hence why DnD has warhorses and normal horses.
Meese couldn't be trained to not be scared of artillery fire.
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>>49810550

Horses are just big dumb goofballs, aren't they.
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>>49810584

If a horse can be trained, a moose probably can

Its just a matter of not being stomped to death by ice age megafauna
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>>49810598
>If a horse can be trained, a moose probably can
It can't.
That's what i'm saying.
The swedes gave up trying to create moose cavalry precisely for this reason.
The Mooses couldn't be trained to not get scared.
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>>49810232
A few dozen generations of breeding to take the wilderness out of them and properly domesticate them would make it a lot mroe practical in general though.
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>>49810592

yeah

They are convinced that they are living in a survival horror and are therefore a bit jumpy. Combined with sensitive but imprecise hearing and eyesight, and their danger radar gets set off by random shit constantly
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>>49809160
>Reinstated horse in North American servers
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>>49810575
>My previous steed had exactly 1.

The game displays it as 1, but 26% of that was lost due to problems with the calculation, so you were actually getting only 0.74 horsepower.
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>>49810604
>The Mooses couldn't be trained to not get scared.
More like it couldn't be trained to not shiv people innawoods.
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>>49810608
Herbivores in the wild pretty much ARE living in survival horror.
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>>49810617
They can actually be tamed enough not to kill or maim people.

>>49810608
I loved the one video where a horse just walks up to a plastic bag sitting still in the middle of the road and then freaks the fuck out.
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>>49810622

tru dat
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>>49810608

They even operate on tank controls with a surprise jump-step to the right when spooked.
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>>49810550
>>49810608

thread derailed
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>>49810662

... This might need to be a game, a survival horror with a horse main character
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>>49810550
>Horses are scared by loud things
Dis nigga. I've trained my to not give any fucks whatsoever. They've done the Santa sled thing with bells and everything, not giving fucks. Plastic bags? You mean play toys. Posts? Belly scratchers. Rabbits? Fuck those things, they're everywhere where my horses live, they're only afraid of that goddamned badger anymore. Anything new? Bitch please, mine keep walking ina straight line when a firetruck and two ambulances screech past at 100+kph, with sirens and everything.

You've just got the wrong breed I'm afraid.
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>>49810686
>>49810662
People talking shit about horses, but the current gen of robots can't even deal with doorframes.
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>>49810748
This.

Where I live, we have a big annual historical play outdoors.
There's cannonfire, muskets, pyro, loud music, and about twenty horses. It's all amateur riders with their own horses, they've just trained them well, and I've never seen one of them freak out.
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>>49810779
What is Tarantino doing next to that robot?
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>>49810779
What has that got to do with anything?
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>>49810779
To be fair, horses have a millions of years head start on robots in terms of evolutionary optimisation.

Robo horse never.
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>>49808297
Thanks wizard!
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>>49810806
Testing its Cuck protocols
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Have they fixed that bug where any animal can count towards the horse's "herd" requirement? I've seen people game the system with two horses and a couple goats.
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>>49808297
>Ctrl + F
>"horse anus"
>0 matches
okay
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>>49810959

Horse anus?
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>>49810831
>Robo horse never.
Why not?
Robot or cyborg horses would be great for mounted police work, there's a reason they keep them around for riot control in cities and difficult terrain in the country. Depending on your setting there might be gene mods in there as well
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>>49810949

I grew up on a horse farm, and our fields were a kind of safe haven for all the deer in the area. The deer would come and chill in our fields during hunting season or when there were coyote about. The deer didn't consider the horses to be a threat, and the had learned over time that hunters and coyote didn't come near our farm.

The horses, for their part, barely seemed to notice that the deer were there at all.

It was fun watching deer jump through the electric fence. I have seen them do it half a dozen times, but I still can't properly explains the motions involved. They didn't go over the fence, they just jumped forwards, became sideways and slide through the gap between two of the strands of electric braid, and then land on their feet. Like threading the needle.

Not so hilariously, while totally okay with deer our horses were NOT okay with cows. A neighbors cow got loose, wandered up to our farm to check out our barn, and in doing so panicked a couple of our horses so bad that in their terror they destroyed THREE of our fences, one suffering some pretty bad injuries in the process. As to be expected by throwing your body against wooden posts until they break. All because they saw a dairy cow and decided that it was a monster.
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>>49810979
Because quadcopters are cheaper.
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>>49810831
We're getting there though, as humans we're capable of making a great many useless things
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>>49809160
>didn't remove rare % chance for horses to spawn unicorns
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>>49810949
>bug
That's intentional so friends can play together. And honestly 2h/2g is pretty meh tier, you just need to git gud a little.
There are a couple ways to break the game a little with multiherding, but goats aren't going to do it and can be fun to mess around with.
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>>49810949
I've found Donkeys to be superior to Goats for meeting the herd prerequisite. It also gives you a chance to get the Mule rare spawn.
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>>49809160
>tfw they didn't fix a mule infertility bug.
God damn it, fix this shit already!
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>>49811243
It's not a bug, it's a feature.
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>>49809160
>mfw when I found a workaround to re-activate the rapehorse
>mfw the same coding that was supposed to prevent it now makes it untargetable
>mfw it no longer distinguishes between living and dead players either
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>>49811081
> Not showing kinetic sculptures that literally tear/shake themselves apart
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>>49811268
Fuck this game, they promised me a full genetically compatibility and what I get?!
At least add more Goat Towers.
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>>49811271
Where's your face? Did the horse take it off?
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>>49811243
No way Jose.
All animals work under the same rules when it comes to interspecies breeding. Some have an additional rule to produce sterile offspring.
If they decided to get rid of that we could get our servers swamped with liger farmers and their atempts to breed ones with the highest stats
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>>49811081
>We're getting there

This one's a fake though.
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>>49811305
Raped it to fuckin' bits, m8.
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From my home area
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Horses horses horses. When can I get my Diregoat mount?
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Dat feel when sheeps are so underpowered species. How they still have are most numerous playbase
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>>49811382
Too many welshmen
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>>49811355
The steam man of Newark did reasonably well
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>>49811379
M8, I'm still lookin for mine Emu mount.
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>>49811438
You should wait for the Dire Emu that becomes tameable in the next patch They are in the game right now as "Cassowary"
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>>49811382
Wool buffs look good on paper, and they synergise well.
Plus they've got a low barrier of skill for entry. It's easy to play a decent sheep game. Though playing a master rank Ram is -I'd argue- one of the hardest to play endgame.
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>>49808297
I don't know about this.
Old horse was just fine, water traversing is overrated and at least old horse didn't explode.
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>>49811382
>Dat feel when sheeps are so underpowered species.

Toppest kek.
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>>49811704
This shit was beta and more like test creature and you know it. Good riddance they removed that.
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Why are goats so fucking buggy?

I mean, they're hilarious and shit, you drop one in a city and watch everything burn within minutes.
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>>49811807
At least they're the perfect counter for trolls.
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>>49811733
>tfw beta testers were faggots and whined about cool megafauna so much that it was pretty much completely removed outside of asian and african servers
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I swear i am the only one in my server who runs deer. I don't get it, they're core. They look cool. They have the whole antler thing which is just majestic.
But everyone is just fucking farmyard expac all day every day.

Is it like this everywhere or do I have to bite the bullet and go llama or something?
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>>49809226
If you equip 4 different quality levels, it still works. BTW anyone got a mod to change wooden, glass, and paper horseshoes to the skin of adamantine?
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>>49810232
The plural of moose is mooses, moose, or from the original language of Algonquin, moosug.

Here's a blog post that explains why its not meese.
http://blog.oxforddictionaries.com/2015/03/plural-moose-meese/
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>>49810959

that was one of the few things the early devs got absolutely right though.

>>49810550
pic related.
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>>49810861
Don't mention it.
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>>49808297
But can it love?
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>>49815288

Have you ever been around a horse? They're quite aggressive about their love.

If MonMun was being any way accurate about animal behavior than Cerea would be constantly bumping her rump into Darling and act like a huge obnoxious dork around him.
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>>49811452
The game files list them as "murder_bird" though.
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>>49815319
I bet they're just misunderstood like wasps.
Wasps are actually pretty neat.
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A wasp once approached my breakfast outside in summer and tried to get a bit of ham, but it was of course too heavy for it and it couldn't cut it in time, so i cut off a tiny bit, and shoved it under its nose whereupon it happily flew away with it.
I really don't get why people are afraid of them.
>>49815711
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File: wasp.jpg (71KB, 640x461px) Image search: [Google]
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>>49815766
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>>49809160
>Fixed issue with horse trying to rape players
FUCK YOU DEVS, THIS WAS LITERALLY 90% OF THE REASON TO GET A LEVEL IN HORSE RIDING.
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>>49815766
We get wasps shearing tiny pieces off slices of ham all the time during summer. It's quite adorable and they aren't particularily dangerous when they're alone and far from their nests.

Though folks with allergies do have reasons to panic in their presence.
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>>49810979
Because... I would feel our mounted police wouldn't be doing their job right if their mounts were not constantlu trying to rape innocent bystandards. You have a Robo-horse that just follows commands and that's just cold and distanf... nowhere near as comforting as a fleshy horse cock penetrating your ass.
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>>49815902
They beat up my bees. Fuck wasps.
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>>49815949
This. Wasp apologists deserve to hang.
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>>49811081
>It starts spinning

Lost my shit
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>>49809160
>Fixed issue with horse trying to rape players
Get fucked GM, that's the core of my build
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>>49815766
Found the wasp poster.
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>>49815949
>>49817638
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>>49810575
They were bugged to have only .74 Don't you ever read dev notes?

Dang I liked the rainbow horses...


On the plus side the horseshoe nerf was badly needed.
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>>49811640
Neither does Horse 2.0. Unless your applying aftermarket magics recklessly, but that can blow up ANY creature.
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>>49809160
>Fixed issue with horse trying to rape players

It's not a defect. Players are simply riding them wrong.
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>>49809160
>Fixed centaur half human half horse hack
Damn.
Thread posts: 98
Thread images: 19


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