Asshole GMs

>>48967642
>GM does an excellent job imersing the player into the town's atmosphere
>"Waaaaa the GM is mean! I hate him!"

>>48967642
You now realize that nobody had traveling papers to begin with and literally everything the guard said was a lie.

>>48967642
>>48967679
Exactly, your first quest was probably to kill the guard.

>>48967642
Man, shut up, that's hilarious.

Try This one:
> playing a half elf sorcerer
>had a staff with the soul of a cleric trapped inside
>all sorts of powers
>travel with staff girl for a long time. Develop relationship.
>one of the other pcs goes behind my back
>petitions a God, asks for staff girl.to have body again
>boon granted
>super passed that I lost my staff
>whatever, now I can be with girl
>things get heavy really fast
>stop because it's too fast. We stop
>go for a walk, clear my head
>get back
>open door
>staff girl is gangbanging 8 random soldier and the pc.who got her a body in the first place.
>breaks trust, ruins relationship.
>dm says he did it for the lulz.

>>48967657
But he lied! GMs can't lie to players!

>>48967642
Seriously, the idea of townsfolk hassling newbie adventurers with fake quests is pretty fun. It's like being told to fetch some elbow grease on your first day at the job.

>>48967729
Mein Gott...

>>48967731
You have to separate the GM speaking as himself and speaking as a NPC, anon.

>>48967642
>important NPC tells us major plot point
>since we've been tricked before, have detect lies spell up
>reads green
>turns out it was wrong
>go in completely wrong direction
>waste time, people die
>haha, NPC believed it himself, he was honestly relating inaccurate information, fuck you.

>>48967729
>It's raining

>>48967766
>RAINING BLOOD

>>48967642
That's hilarious.

Now you have to get back at them by gathering a bunch of rats and letting them loose in the basement.

>>48967756
It's a dick move, but it checks out mechanically.

>>48967785
>MFW no basement

Just one little problem with your plan anon

But seriously, there's no way that inn didn't have any rats.

>>48967785
>>48967793

He just has to secretly build a basement.

>Oh, man, since when did we have a basement?
>OH GOD'S, SO MANY RATS!

>>48967729
This can't be real. Please say you're rusing us, anon.

>>48967642

Go back to the guard and assure him that there are no more rats in the inns basement, and he is free to check if he doesn't believe you.

If he brings up the fact that there isn't a basement, point out that means it can't have a rat problem and the task he assigned to you is completed.

>>48967843

But to build a basement like that in secret, he needs workers. Magic to cover their trail, or just really strong magic to simple make the basement build itself.

You also need a cabal of verminmancers to summon and bind the rats to the basement so they don't leave. The bigger and nastier the rats, the better.

You are, effectively, the small scale BBEG of this town. The rats are coming, can't you hear them?

THE RATS

>>48967836
Clearly the patrons were the rats, anon
better slaughter them so they can't reproduce, and clear out their little nests so the little ones can't rebuild

>>48967819
Lies within lies, there's no way an inn doesn't have a basement unless it's located in a city with some specific zoning law saying they can't have one. The door was behind the counter where you couldn't see it.

The inn had a basement and a rat problem, part of your quest was figuring it out. They don't want some half-baked adventurer taking jobs in their town if all it takes is a few peasants laughing at him to put him off a quest.

>>48967745
>>48967766
>>48967855

Hand to Pelor, it's true. It happened a long time ago, and while I was crazy mad at the time, it's cool now. Although, soon after that we kicked out that other player, and now we only have 2 people from that original group, me and the dm of that story. But, we don't let him dm anymore.

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>>48967836
>>48967876
I'm pretty sure the implication is that this shit happens on the reg. Guards see a green-looking adventurer, ask him for his "papers" (which anyone experienced would recognize as bullshit), then send him along to the tavern to embarrass himself by inquiring about the rat job.

10/10 DM desu senpai

>>48967902
>Lies within lies, there's no way an inn doesn't have a basement unless it's located in a city with some specific zoning law saying they can't have one.
Or, you know, it's in an area with a high water table.

>>48967906
How'd it go down directly? How'd your character react?

I mean jeez. Betrayed by your girlfriend staff.

>>48967642

Your GM is awesome, fuck off.

>>48967906
Hey, sometimes s girl needs some mileage.

>>48967729
was she at least getting railed by orc guards for maximum cucking?

>>48967642

Well to be fair adventurers are vagabonds that are often bad news since they go looking for trouble. Unless you have built up a reputation you SHOULD be treated with suspicion and ridicule.

>>48967729
Well, hey, she finally had a body again, she wanted to put it to good use, you weren't up to it...

>>48968082
>Unless you have built up a reputation you SHOULD be treated with suspicion and ridicule.
The way players tend to play their characters, once they have built a reputation they should be treated with even more suspicion, though probably not ridicule.

>>48967642
This is actually pretty funny, I've not heard of someone doing this before.

>>48967950
My character didn't have a lot of.time after that. So besides never trusting her or the other PC again, not much. Soon after that, there was the climax of this war we were involved in. The other PC died, the staff girl fled mid-battle. Me and the remaining PC rode off into sunset on the back of my Dire Giant Tortoise mount.

I spent a couple weeks away from the group, came back and had a good heart to heart with the dm. Everything worked out, I guess.

>>48968131
>the staff girl fled mid-battle

to this day she is still out there somewhere, getting fucked by bugbears

>>48967895
>this is how anon turned into Pied Piper

>>48968146
>staff girl is probably someone's PC from an ERP game the GM is in, whose goal in life is to end up a dragon's cocksleeve

>>48968146

>instead of keeping tally on mighty beasts slain she has a mighty beasts laid list.

>>48967642
P gud really.

>>48968172
>instead of keeping tally on mighty beasts slain she has a mighty beasts lain list.
Why did I have to fix this for you? Do you even Carlos?

>>48968210

I'm sorry i can't brain today.

>>48967906
>>48967729
Well idk, the gangbang is a weird place to go with it but it seems appropriate to have the girl end up with the guy that went to the effort of getting a god to intervene to save her from her nightmarish existence, especially if he did it with no expectation of reward. On the other hand you have the guy who says he likes her but is clearly irritated that she's turned into a real person instead of a useful and compliant tool. Seems like the appropriate ending to me.

>>48968166
>>48968172
"Totems from a whole goblin tribe, gold from a dragon's hoard, hill giant scrimshaw, devil's shield. You must be one mighty adventurer miss to have amassed all these battle trophies."

"Oh no these are just gifts from my boyfriends."

"..."

You know, the staff girl was probably a succubus and the body she was given was probably just a normal human female. So instead of being a demon, she just turned out to be a slut.

It figures too, because sealing extraplanars like demons into weapons is what makes them intelligent, depending on the setting. I'm a bit rusty on Forgotten Realms, but I'm pretty sure that's how it worked. Cutter would be my example of this.

Alright, let's see how this goes
>be playing level 6 wizard
>dm hates my characters for some reason
>Probably because I like understanding and applying the rules
>try my best to roleplay though regardless
>anyways
>party arrives in new town after world shattering realization that our patron was the bbeg all along
>wizard decides to kip off to a bar and drink
>alone time is important for those magic types
>dm says "a prostitute approaches you and offers her services"
>fuckno.jpg
>"she drags you away anyways"
>"you now have chlamydia"

>>48968224
Think of it this way: I'm the guy who.likes her for who she is. I didn't care if she was a staff or a girl, we laughed together, we cried together. For almost two years all we could do was talk, and we got to.know each other on such an intimate level, that it grew into love. I was scared of the idea.of her having a body and having sex all in the same day. It's a lot to take in all at once.

Then we have the PC who never spoke with her or interacted with her at all. Not one word. He didn't even know she was a staff until the session before, and we had played for 10 months before that. He then didn't talk.to.me about giving her a body. Which I would have been fine with.

Then the dm, who decided instead of having an interesting and thoughtful interaction between two people who supposedly love each other, has the girl fuck everyone in the immediate area because he thought it was funny. He was cackling in his chair the whole time.

I.would have punched him if I didn't remove myself from the situation.

>>48968433
My new working hypothesis is that gangbang dm was taking revenge (in a kind of petty and passive aggressive way) for sitting through two years of you and other dm playing out a sappy romance between a wizard and his staff.

>>48968368
That's what happens when you roll a character that can be physically overpowered by a lady of the night, get drunk, and go off without your beefcake bodyguard. I bet you dressed provocatively, too. You were basically asking for it.

>>48968481
It was all the same dm. There was no other, it was the same person.

>>48968496
>implying
It's a pretty shitty GM who lets women have more than 14 strength in their setting.
Seriously. Dryads and Nymphs are both STR 10. Even Succubus are only STR 13. What kind of setting are you running where women kill people with blades? It's just not their style.

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>>48968496

Nothing worse than slutty manwizards.

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>>48968561

>>48968592
It's not a meme when RAW supports it.

>>48967785
Just up end half a dozen grey (?) bags of tricks, and flood the whole bar with small animals.

>>48968709
5e. Not that easy.

>>48967642

Be glad there wasn't actual rats there or worse a rat king.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zi_hSogLSAs

Rolled 7 (1d10)

>>48968509
The guards and other pc were obviously helping her via immersion therapy.
You should be proud of your waifu

>Not bullying weebs at your table

>>48968908
THis, weeb is for bully

>>48969227
But she's just a kid! No bully!

>>48968433
The more I hear about your shitty story the more I believe your DM was entirely in the right.

>>48968561
>It's a pretty shitty GM who lets women have more than 14 strength in their setting.
AD&D, which was the earliest adopter of different strength ranges for men and women that I know of, caps the strength for female humans at 18/50, which is obviously far above 14.

>>48967679
He was probably angling to charge a 10 gold "entry fee" or something before the adventurer comment, and decided to have some fun instead.

>>48967743
I've always wanted to start a company selling a cleaning solution or something called "Elbow Grease", just to further confuse things.

"Hahah, stupid new kid thought 'elbow grease' was a real thing!"
"Um... it is. I have some at home."

>>48967785
Good idea.

>>48967843

A basement can be just a hole big enough under the Inn, easy to do.

>>48969900
>AD&D
>good

Grog detected.

>>48969973
No, it can't be just a hole. It's the principal. This has to be a storeroom. It has to be stocked, maintained, well supplied. This has to be something the likes of which the King's own larder would weep in jealousy over.

And it must be utterly teeming with rats.

>>48970063
No. I prefer Basic, where there is literally no difference between males and females when it comes to ability scores.

>>48968433
>>48969882
Your GM sounds very juvenile. I guarantee he has an NTR fetish.

>>48971368
>NTR
>juvenile

?

>>48968561
/pol/ is that way.

>Be swashbuckler in pathfinder campaign we're all lvl 4
>Decide to chance through a frozen forest that was said to be controlled by cultists
>A day into the journey after finding many signs telling us to fuck off we encounter our first cultist
>Draped in black 500 feet away dancing and singing naked
>We all roll and quite hilariously fail a willsave
>Turns out he encapsulated us just long enough for most of our food to get nicked
>They leave watching us
>We press onwards
>That was our first mistake
>Life turns into hell
>Constant hit and run attacks
>Minor illusion up the ass
>Cant rest or get attacked
>Night falls and we set up a fire and the spell casters try to sleep
>Nights filled with the cultists banging pots and shields together
>Every hour one of them chances it and tries to sneak up and dump water on one of us
>More hit and runs
>Notes pinned to trees with hurtful messages and personal attacks
>Get fed up and decide to chase
>Run through traps and the like
>Mistake two was our ranger deciding to split off to chase one who ran with a limp
>Gets gang banged by three other cultists and nearly dies
>We kill two and they explode showing us we're fighting Dark Folk
>Meet back up and get ambushed
>No casualties on either side they spent attacks sundering clothing and bedding
>Relies we're barely half way through and starting to suffer from lack of sleep/food
>Turn back they leave us alone
Fucking hell GM brought up he just used tactics he thought an under armed and weaker force would use on a stronger enemy. Also brought up how surprised he was that we acted more or less like video game NPC's when it came to choosing targets and chasing.

>>48972213
>Playing swashbuckler
You deserve everything you get.

>>48972213
You GM sounds like alot of fun actually.

>>48968172
I've read that hentai.

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>lethality is zero
>DMPC always bail the party out of tight spots
>everyone in the world is helpful and friendly except the villains
>PCs can do whatever the fuck they want and never face sterner repercussions than a finger shake, if there are any rivalries or persecutions aimed at the PCs they're mostly comic
>party's basically running a cushy 9/5 job going out, killing some monsters 1-2 CRs below them, then coming back to a royal feast and everyone hailing them as heroes
DM's not an asshole, actually as chill a dude as can be...but sometimes I feel like we're metaphorically wrapped into five layers of sweaters and bubble wrap and told to fight paraplegic puppies with boxing gloves on.

It would also be easier to swallow if the game was very lighthearted and cartoonish I guess, but we're basically CN Murderhoboes Extraordinaire: the Party

>>48967793
In a way, that makes it even worse. He actually put deliberate thought into fucking them over instead of just dropping rocks on them or something.

>>48968589
Bigby's Grasping Beard?

>>48967642
Reminds me of Bard's Tale.

>>48971397
ntr is for the criminally insane

>>48967642
Luigi stop whining

>>48967729
Your DM is a filthy cuck fetishist and you got magical realm'd

>>48967876
"You collapsed the inn!'

"Thus filling the basement and removing the rodent problem!"

"People died!"

"So I get extra XP?"

>>48967729
Had a GM like this once.... made it a point to kill his PCs ( usually in over the top contrived manners) when my turn came up and to kill his special snowflake GMPCs at any and every opportunity that presented itself.
One of the others assisted me and the other didn't give a shit.

>>48972213
I can't believe this is in an asshole GM thread.

Sounds like the worst - or perhaps only - crime here is you and the GM had differing expectations of how the game would work and what sort of things to expect in it. Sounds to me like you're upset - or at least upset enough to call the GM an asshole - because you were expecting a more...I'll put it lightly and call it a more traditional kind of foe who passively awaits you in some kind of preplanned encounter scene that's balanced juust so that you'll win but not without effort, that kind of thing. You came up against a challenge you weren't expecting, but it's neither an unfair one nor something I would argue is "technically" within the rules not not intended.

If you don't want to worry about things like rest and supply, don't play games that model rest and supply. If the game models those things they're fair game for the GM.

>>48974742
*but not intended.

Admittedly, not clearly communicating what to expect in one's game IS a fault of the GM, but it hardly makes him an asshole not to spoil things for you.

>>48971545
Realism isn't /pol/
or is it?

>>48967642
>Be DM
>Make a fun joke to immerse player in my world
>actually have guards be remotely interesting
>He goes into full autism rage and complains on chinese cartoon board
>calls me an asshat
Why do I even dm anymore? Fuck you Ryan.

>>48972213
Nigger, the fact that the world can be flexible and proactive with human intelligence behind it is like the #1 strength TTRPG has over video games.

Fuck off back to World of Warcraft if what you really want is a passive, unchanging explore->kill->loot->explore loop while your skinnerbox reward XP and gold slowly increases.

Some of us like having to actually think and adapt our strategy to unplanned-for or changing context.

>>48968368
>Probably because I like understanding and applying the rules
If a new player of mine told me "I like understanding and applying the rules," I'd instantly mark them as a powergamer munchkin or a rules lawyer.

Are you sure your GM wasn't passive-aggressively getting back at you because you were minmaxing or arguing over the rules to the detriment of everyone else's fun?

>>48967642
Didn't this happen in Bard's Tale? The remake

>>48969951
>always wanted to start a company selling a cleaning solution or something called "Elbow Grease"
I've some bad news, anon

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>>48975977
I'm stupid.
Also, check'em.

>>48975945
No, there was an actual rat in the basement besides the firebreathing one.

>>48975945
No, in that game there was one very large rat rather than a bunch of minor rats.

>>48974962

Your fault really, everyone knows Ryan is a faggot

>>48968344
Not really necessary to sus out the logic behind all of this. His DM was clearly just a tool.

>>48976413
Agreed

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>>48967729
R E K T

Also, I think your GM was in the right.
>be stuck in staff forever
>bond with one wielder, become his SO
>some other guy literally gets a god to give me a body again
>finally I can get some for the first time in decades
>go to BF, finally to get some man-meat
>he gets cold feet, runs the fuck off
>butyouwerethechosenone.jpg
>don't care, it's been decades, gotta get some NOW
>complain to dude who freed me
>next thing I know I'm in a room with nine guys I barely know

You fucked up so badly anon. You could have had a thirsty cleric waifu, but instead you got cucked.

>>48968433
>Then the dm, who decided instead of having an interesting and thoughtful interaction between two people who supposedly love each other, has the girl fuck everyone in the immediate area because he thought it was funny.

Anon you literally had her squirming in your character's lap aching to get impaled on his fat dick, you described things as getting "heavy, very very heavy" and you even made it sound like the heaviness was happening right after she got turned into a human.

What she did was unforgivable and the DM was clearly an ass for doing it, but can you see where things could have gone better? Why didn't your character give her the dick, why did he hesitate getting heavy with someone you've been trying to convince us was basically his soul-mate?

>>48975977
>>48975992
Hey, as long as the product's out there, I'm happy.

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>>48979630
Also why did anon get so CLEARLY overattached to a DnD waifu?? I can understand being miffed at the loss of a good weapon, but who really cares who your imaginary girlfriend (that your DM imagined in the first place) imaginarily fucked? Just imagine it didn't happen; you're cucking yourself here.

>>48971545
Fail for not spotting the -4STR troll

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>>48967642
That's pretty damn funny desu

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>>48967729

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>>48967642
I'll be honest, that's actually pretty fucking funny.

>>48972213
>Draped in black
>Naked
How?

>>48980463
>roleplaying games
>only care about your imaginary weapons instead of caring about you imaginary waifu.
Why even play? Just write halberd of memery +10000 on a piece of paper and cry yourself to sleep

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>>48967729
>>48967906
>>48968131
>>48968433
>>48968509

You spaghetti'd hard with your waifu, friendzoned yourself and you're mad at your GM for having a laugh at your expense after you got him to cyber as a girl for you for two years before you fucked it up?

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>>48982834
>blowing 2 years of character development on a joke I can guarantee only he found funny.
>an acceptable thing to do
that guy detected

>>48972785
sounds terribly boring desu

>>48982743
I think the NPC was roleplayed perfectly well, anon. You were pining for her in the staff, right? Well imagine how she was pining without even any kind of physical body.

She gets one, she starts with you - this is the first time she's felt arousal since she was literally trapped in a fucking staff, she wants to fuck. She needs to fuck, and she wants to do it with the guy who talked with her all the way through this horrible non-physical experience. And then you back off like you're having second thoughts ("Does he not like how I look? How I am as a person? How can he be having second thoughts after all we went through?"). I mean literally you were in love with this girl as a lump of wood and now she's a person - and probably a good-looking young woman too, but honestly ANY person would work. ANY person is a better prospect than a stick of wood - you back off. You make some shitty excuse and leave her all hot and bothered and thinking the romance was for nothing.

Well, you didn't do shit from her. Maybe everything was a tragic mistake. So she speaks to the guy who DID do something from her, got her a body again. And you're adventurers so you're probably all /fit/ and the guards are probably in pretty good shape too. And she just goes hog fucking wild, why not? She has a fucking body again, it's time to FEEL again. And I bet those 9 stranger's dicks felt fucking great anon.

Your D&D waifu didn't abandon you. Your DM didn't fuck with you. You abandoned her. You fucked with him.

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>>48982888
Ok I guess I'm That Guy then because I see the humour in a player forgetting that this is a fantasy game and attaches his beta male insecurities to his fantasy character, thereby flushing two years of RP down the drain rather than take this chance to at least pretend to be alpha.

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I'll post this again

>Party wants to move to bigass city because reasons
>Gear up, get everything together, tell DM we're going
>DM: K, guise, y'all ready?
>Party: Yeah, lets move on
>DM: Ok. On your way to bigass city you invade the plains with the gay ass mist
>Party: Are you fucking serious
>DM: Yes I am, you never specified which way to go
>Party: Fine, fine. We plan our journey and walk through the dirt road.
>DM: Too late, roll your save or fiddle man holes

>>48983118
>you invade the plains with the gay ass mist
This is an excellent phrase.

>>48983118
>roll your save or fiddle man holes
That's /tg/ in prison talk.

>>48967642
>guys i was embarrassed by FICTIONAL PEOPLE!
>fuck my GM

>>48967642
>Starts roleplaying
>Guards are acting like dicks
>Take it personally and blame GM

>Roleplaying

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>>48967729

>>48967729
How could you not give staff grill your staff?

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>>48967729
>have pretend girlfriend
>post on 4chan about "trust" and "things getting heavy"

>>48983900
Because he only has a little wand, and she wants a big, thick warhammer.

>>48967731
The NPC lied, they can do that.

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>>48983916

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>>48967729
As someone that has never done any RP type games I cannot fathom how this comes about let alone someone trying to hook you up with a fantasy stick person

So you and a few people are sitting around a table and the turbofat with the cardboard shame deflector tells you that the made up person that was previously in your walking stick wants to bone you?

and then you just continue this game?

no realization that you are sitting around a table being cucked out of reality by the cheetomaster?

I think you deserved the fantasy cuckbang for playing games where you sit around listening to faggots set you up with imaginary pixies.

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>>48984450

>>48968561
>It's a pretty shitty GM who lets women have more than 14 strength in their setting.
I mean its DnD so who gives a shit?

>>48982708
I suppose it could mean they're wearing a black cloak or something but are otherwise completely naked, and you'd see everything if you saw them from the front.

>>48983116
You know, it being funny AND it being a dick move aren't mutually exclusive concepts. His GM is still a cum-gargling twat.

>>48982966
>ANY person is a better prospect than a stick of wood
No. There are plenty of people where I would rather cuddle a staff than fuck them, especially if it's a talking staff that's like a best friend to me.

As for the rest, I think a better DM would have had her actually express all the feelings of frustration and loneliness and play out a scene where she just freaks out that he doesn't want to move so fast. Then there can actually be dialogue, character development, and actual discussion of things. You know, like how people act.

I also suspect that people would have less of a problem with him not wanting to move so fast if the sexes were reversed. Instead they'd be saying they guy who used to be trapped in the staff shouldn't let his "thirstiness" overcome him and respect the female PC's boundaries and all that.

>>48986263
>they guy
*the guy

>>48983116
What kind of shitty fantasy world still requires you to be "alpha"? I go to fantasy worlds to *escape* that shit.

>>48986263
There's no indication she didn't do that. The PC bailed on her

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>>48967729

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>>48986494
Shit's not required, I guess you can decide that your character is a spineless fuckstick if you want. Which I guess is what the OP did, consciously or not.
But I don't see why you would choose that and then complain that your GM took two years out of his life to RP a make-belief girlfriend for you and at least wanted a laugh out of it.

>>48989096
>is the dm really going to try and erp with me?
>umm, I uhh go outside to clear my head (and think of a way to avoid this)
What I want to know is why you think roleplaying sex with and in front of your presumably male friends is a alpha thing to do.

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>>48989194
Kek. So this was the more dignified option then?

>playing a cultist character in a long term campaign
>bump into one of my cult leaders traveling on the road
>gives me a ritual scroll to be used in most dire need
>months go by, waiting for dire need
>finally, shit is getting fucked, need is dire, I use the scroll
>the entire cult was a lie, the scroll summons a demon god that steals my testicles and sews them into a book, then turns my character into a cripple that can barely walk with a permanent curse that can't be cured.

Why

>being cucked by your imaginary girlfriend
Literally the ultimate cuckold

>>48989444
The cult of sick pranks can get pretty meta

>>48967729
>Coming up next, on Things That Never Happened™

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>>48983118
I like the way your DM thinks.

>>48989096
>GM took two years out of his life to RP a make-belief girlfriend for you
Which makes it all the more odd that he'd be willing to just throw it all away because of one (understandable, in my opinion) moment of hesitation. Not only is it a dick move, it's also just bad storytelling.

>>48989965
Exactly! This sounds like a terribly small, sad scene. I hope the DM confessed his own insecurities and has a nice boyfriend now.Or 9.

>>48986897
Literally went for a walk, you tool

>>48976413
op = faggot
Ryan = op
Ryan = faggot

Math checks out guys.

>>48968561
The argument appears misogynist but there's another dimension to it. These are not adventurers, they are service npcs who likely aren't out all day killing goblins in dungeons. 10 is, after all, the expected standard of a healthy adult. Maybe smiths have a higher STR due to hammering blades all day, in the same way that merchants have higher INT or scholars have more WIS or courtesans/aristocrats have higher CHA.

On the other hand, it's very possible the Mage made STR his dump stat. Tenser's Floating Disk is still a thing, right?

>>48990775
Who the fuck is Ryan?

>>48991041
A faggot, and OP.

Get with the program

>>48990694
And it sounds like he had every intention of going back to her. He just needed some time to process everything, which I don't think is unreasonable. He didn't even know there was a plan in motion to bring her back to normal, and then suddenly, there she is.

I think it's also pretty suspect that the DM suddenly allowed another PC to just get her a body, out of the blue, by just saying one prayer to some god. You'd think if it were that easy, it would have come up long before that. You'd also think staff girl would want to let sorcerer guy know it's about to happen and would probably want him there when it does happen.

If the DM was well-intentioned, and wanted it to be that easy, he should have dropped that opportunity in the sorcerer's lap and let him do it himself. As it stands, it looks more like he and the other player conspired to fuck the guy over.

>>48991363
That's what I mean. He went for a walk, that's not bailing on someone.
The GM even allegedly admitted he did it for a cheap laugh

>>48967642
>What are sense motive checks

>>48991422
The player needs to pass his sense motive check before his character can role one.

>>48991422

Worthless. See>>48967756

>Be a monk (Zen Archer)
>Party ends up in a place called Kel
>Magic does not work on Kel
>Apparently neither does Ki
>Apparently Ki is magic

>>48991407
>The GM even allegedly admitted he did it for a cheap laugh
Which brings us back to >>48989965. The kind of guy who would pull something like that for a cheap laugh generally isn't also the kind of guy who would go to the effort to play out a developing romance across what I assume was several sessions. So I don't know what the fuck.

>>48991739
I mean the Anon that got fucked doesn't seem particularly bright, so he was probably just easy to satisfy in terms of waifus

>>48991731
>Apparently Ki is magic

Yes. That's 3.5/PF for you. All the nice things are magic.

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I shit you not this was the first campaign I ever took part in

>every one is lvl3 fag
>traveling into sketchy town with 2 bros
>we under powered as shit
>defeat some cultists with shady artifact
>artifact turns out to be op home brew weapon
>literally the Zeus canon from cod zombies
>we are the chosen ones
>start wrecking shit up
>bandits
>evil bards
>trolls
>no one is safe from the 1 hit wonder 5d10's
>meet super cool guy in bar fight
>has bad-ass rogue daughter
>hire them and become some-what serious fighting force
> idiot friend shows off zeus canon to cool guy
>cool guy flips his shit
>LEMME SEE THAT
>beats us all up
>takes the weapon of the chosen one
>npc cool guy now becomes chosen one
>don't see him for 3 sessions
>mfw the dm tells us he saved the world without us

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>>48967642

>>48974928
Realism isn't a place for D&D where magic not only exists, but supersaturates the setting. Say your woman has some distant giant blood in her if you want to justify her muscle mass.

Not a shitty DM story, but we fucked with him quite a bit.

>Be party of 5
>Really early in the game, like 4 hours in
>We just hit lvl 3
>We constantly went the opposite way the DM wanted the campaign to go
>He ends up summoning a lvl 51 demon as a warning
>We keep trying to piss the demon off, because we were cocky as hell
>The look in our DM's eyes when everything he tried to build was falling apart
>He ends up destroying every town around us
>Have to literally travel for 9 hours real time to find nearest village as a punishment

>>48992648
See, the thing about That Guy, is that he doesn't understand how the game works. The GM makes a promise of fun to the players if they agree to follow his rules, and then That Guy goes and ignores those rules.

Of course the GM can't deliver fun. That Guy is too busy stroking his dick under the table with how he's winning the game against that asshole the GM.

>>48967729
No Cortana, whyyyyyyy?

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>>48982966
>>48986263
Yeah, this is literal anime protag levels of idiocy.

>The girl I fell in love with finally has a body, and wants to fuck me and be in a proper relationship!?
>NOPE!
>Abloobloobloo she fucked somebody else

I agree that nine guards is a little excessive, but at the same time being stuck inside a piece of wood for god knows how long, and then being friendzoned by the one person you have developed a bond with (While he also friendzones himself, simultaneously!) is gonna make you rip-shit pissed enough and horny enough to do really stupid things.

Anon literally NTR'd himself out of what could have been a sweet and well-done love story ending. I mean jesus christ, the DM only fucked with him AFTER he spilled his spaghetti all over staff-waifu. It was justified.

>>48967642
>Chaotic neutral, leaning chaotic good, sky pirate campaign
>Hijack an airship full of adamantine ingots fairly early on
>Fly halfway across the world to the dwarven kingdoms
>Sell off the adamantine for credit, trickling it into the economy specifically to prevent collapse
>Make investments in local industries that could be both useful and profitable to us
>Skill checks rolled, diplomacy committed, negotiations fruitful, expecting to see results in a few months time
>Leave to do something else in the meantime, appoint a skilled financial manager to oversee things in the meantime
>This has taken us about 15 sessions, or 60 hours worth of real time, of almost entirely diplomacy and talking to people. Was actually fun for us, constantly asked the DM if he wanted us to do something else, we were assured that he was enjoying himself as well
>We liberate a small oppressed kingdom, a campaign which takes us just over a month
>Return to dwarven kingdoms to inspect our progress
>'Oh, well. Uhh. Your finance manager tells you that the economy collapsed. You have nothing left'

We were righteously pissed. Didn't even try to play it into a plot arc, like the vizier of the kingdom was sabotaging something, or maybe foreign merchants from the place we stole the adamantine from had created an embargo against the dwarves. Nope, just straight up the economy collapsed for no reason, I suspect because the DM didn't want us to have any kind of base or headquarters, or was too lazy to work with us, or realised that giving us a bunch of financial power early on was a mistake and fucked us over instead of admitting his error.

>>48993244

Shit, getting your talking weapon an acceptable body seems like a obvious Quest in and of itself.

>>48993420
Did you torture the advisor?

>>48993244
For fuck's sake, it wasn't NOPE!, it was "I need a moment."

And she must not have wanted to be in a proper relationship that badly if she couldn't give the person she supposedly loved a few minutes to sort things out.

>>48993516
Which is why I think it's a little suspicious that the DM just made it happen all at once out of nowhere instead of building a whole adventure or subplot around it.

>>48993618
How long was she trapped in the staff?

>>48993604
Hurled him off the side of the airship.

GM whined at us for 'being evil'. Well, by jove, we made sure to try to live up to his expectations after that. Went straight up Tehol Beddict with our newfound power to crash any economy we touch.

>>48993721
I don't know. I'm not the guy who posted the story.

>>48993773
>GM whined at us for 'being evil'.
Well, you were. You murdered a man.

>>48993618
>For fuck's sake, it wasn't NOPE!, it was "I need a moment."

Need a moment for WHAT? They've been in constant communication for two years, and now that she's got a body (undoubtedly an attractive one) she desperately wants to use on you, NOW'S the time to try and slow things down?

Dude, there's a time and a place for having moments, but your long-term magical girlfriend finally getting a body she wants you to touch and grope is not one of them.

In fact, fuck him for getting shocked at something like that, he should have been *elated* she got a body, he should have felt nothing but joy! What kind of self-centered, sniveling idiot tries to put the brakes on a relationship when his woman gets the happiest experience in her life and wants to *share it* with him?

>>48993797
He dug his own grave by not contacting us when, you know, the hundred thousand gold pieces worth of property and goods we had invested in began to vanish into the fucking ether, presumably while he stood by and watched.

Any effort at all to salvage our investment, or liquidate assets and conserve as much wealth as possible, IE what he was being paid a significant sum of money to do, and we probably would have slapped him and dumped him in a nice gutter somewhere. We returned to a net worth of zero gold pieces and deemed him too incompetent to continue living.

>>48993773
I mean, I wouldn't expect much different if I had to inform my sky pirate bosses that I failed to keep their investments going

>>48993618
And to her, it probably felt like an incredible betrayal. He finds out that the woman he loves can finally express that love in a fashion she has probably been wishing she was able to for years, and instead of unconstrained joy, she is met with panic as the person she loves shies away and instead goes for a walk.

I'm very specifically not saying that a nine guard gangbang is justified in that scenario, but I am saying that anon fucked up super hard.

>>48984450
>>48984493
Not even that anon, but how is this bait? This is literally what is happening - a bunch of fat nerds salivating (while in a group, nonetheless) over having pretend sex with imaginary characters and even getting "emotionally invested" into it. No other word but "pathetic" springs to mind.

The premise of P&P roleplaying only sounds good on paper. IRL, it's mostly what I described above.

>>48993618
>she must not have wanted to be in a proper relationship that badly if she couldn't give the person she supposedly loved a few minutes to sort things out.

Sort out what? He walked out on her on what was supposed to be the happiest day of her life, so he could... Sort things out? What is there to sort out?

>>48994144
Maybe to get over the emotional shock of having her suddenly appear out of nowhere?

>>48994266

Shouldn't that be something he get over *with* her?

>>48994266
But she didn't.

The character has known her for literally years. They are basically already in a relationship. There's no way to walk out of that situation without it feeling like a betrayal, so the best course of action would have been to... Not walk out of that situation. Talk it out. Don't fuck off for a walk and leave her alone and feeling betrayed when she is clearly not in the most stable of mindsets.

Bearing in mind that as much of a shock as it is for him, it's probably a lot more of a shock for her. You know, what with the whole 'Trapped in a fucking wooden stick for years' thing. The right thing to do would have been to stand his ground and talk it out, whether or not it ended with him giving her the dick.

Anon missed his chance and he suffered for it.

>>48994548
The right thing to do would have been for someone to let him know she was about to be returned to normal so they could have sorted it all out beforehand and none of that unpleasant stuff would have happened.

>>48994548
She's not fucking blameless. It apparently took her no time at all to go from "I want to be with my true love!" to "I want to fuck a bunch of guys I don't even know!" If she's that insane, maybe anon was better off without her.

>>48994682
Not saying she's blameless. Just that the scenario would have played out in a very different way if he hadn't left the room, and might have ended happily, rather than devolving into a peurile NTR joke.

>>48994682
Obviously, the GM didn't expect him to fuck up so spectacularly in that situation. He probably went into a sort of fugue state and decided 'fuck it' and performed the equivalent of burning down the house.

Ultimately, it's still anon's fault. Clearly, the GM went 'lol 8 guards', but her winding up with the PC that got her a body again? Totally anon's fault.

>>48982743
No but the point is he got Actually mad in Real Life. I'm not gonna look up the quote but he said something like "if he hadn't apologized I would've hit [the GM]." THAT'S what I'm making fun of. Of course the character should have been upset, but this dude was truly upset about a girl that didn't exist

>>48994743
>Obviously, the GM didn't expect him to fuck up so spectacularly in that situation.
Yeah, because having any emotion in that situation other than "Have sex immediately" is such a colossal fuckup that he deserves to suffer horribly.

>He probably went into a sort of fugue state and decided 'fuck it' and performed the equivalent of burning down the house.
And that makes him an asshole.

>>48994743
Maybe she wanted to make sure all the holes worked properly.

>>48994844
So we have concluded that nobody was right, that everybody was wrong and also an asshole.

>>48994853
New car needs a test drive, doesn't it?

>>48994877
First part was sarcastic. I don't believe anon was wrong.

>>48994946
In what way is the guy who left his game group for a few weeks because he was so upset about his fake pen and paper role-playing game girlfriend being taken by another character because he decided that he didn't want to spend his true love's first moments back in a real body with her and instead decided to just wander off on his own to reconsider their relationship not in the at least some way?

>>48994997
Maybe he's a little wrong, but not "deserves to lose her forever" wrong. What she did was far worse.

>>48993721
>>48968433

Terribly shit D.M sharing horribly overused cliche 1st level task that would be non existent in 'real world' fantasy setting.

>DM barely understands how D&D works, regardless of edition
>Is making a home brew setting
>Asks 3 of us to make 10th level characters to test out a boss encounter
>I roll a Pally, the others are a Fighter and a Cleric
>"Ok, so you guys are walking down the road, and you see a guy with a scroll"
>I greet the guy, ask about the scroll
>"roll initiative"
>Oh
>The guy turns out to be a vampire lord or some shit
At this point I should point out that he never told us what he rolled, ever. He'd always hide his dice when he rolled for anything, and always conveniently pass every check, hit with every attack, etc.
>Guy gets first in initiative (of course)
>DM starts describing him preparing a spell
>Fighter has Mage Slayer as a feat, can make an attack against adjacent spell casters
>"Uhh, what's the reach on your weapon? Oh, 5 feet? He's 6 feet away."
>Rolls 2d6, "Ok you guys take 90 poison damage"
>I point out that I have resistance to poison damage
>"WHAT? That's so OP!! I'll nerf that when the real campaign starts"
>I go next in combat, roll attack, hit, Divine Smite with Greataxe for 2d8+1d12, roll relatively high
>"He chuckles at you as you strike, he seems undeterred"
>Alright, I'll make my second attack then
>Que more whining and complaining about how OP Paladins are, they shouldn't get multiattack, etc, etc
>Drop it, let the cleric go
>Rolls spell attack, hits, Guiding bolt
>Starts rolling D6's, DM insists that he's rolling too many, goes and scours through the PHB to try and prove himself right, pouts when it turns out he's not
>Cleric rolls damage, DM says the vampire is unfazed, Cleric and I question this, shouldn't Vampires be weak to radiant damage?
>"Oh, not in my setting."
>Fighter's turn, tries to hit with his greatsword, somehow misses every swing, despite not rolling lower than 16.
>Vampire's turn, heals himself to full with a cup of blood, turns to mist, spams us with saveless 90+ damage spells every turn until we all die.

>>48995169
>but not "deserves to lose her forever" wrong. What she did was far worse.

I'm inclined to think the DM got turbo-butthurt that the player ruined a tender moment by saying he "needed to go out and walk."

>>48993420
now That's a shitty GM

>>48995653
maybe the worst DM in this thread. Way worse than the gangbang guy.

>>48995169
>>48995708
>Be Stafffu
>Finally gain body, tell anon I want to put it to use
>He excuses himself for a moment and I'm confused
>Realize he must be worried about the body being cursed, so I get another party member and some guards to help try it out and make sure my body won't curse him
>Anon doesn't talk to me anymore
>but this sex thing is pretty great.

>>48993721
>>48993721
Almost two years (in-game)
The character who got her the body found out the session before.

>>48994016
This, right here. Roleplaying is working backwards from the most autistic and cringeworthy thing ever, and I genuinely pity anyone who actually does it.

>I roll to hit the monster XD
>I level up!!!!!

Cancer

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Still can't believe staffcuckanon got ACTUALLY mad in real life about an imaginary gangbang. And yeah, he kinda deserved it. I'd play with that DM way sooner than I'd play with one like >>48995653
or
>>48993420
or especially staffcuckanon himself, who's made me sit through two years of a soap opera co-starring a stick.

I was an asshole GM a couple times

My favorite example is a game of Deathwatch. My players went through hell and back to save a Lord Commander of an IG company from being captured by the invading Tau, they defeated an entire hunter cadre and a Riptide with sheer force of will and lots of screaming.

So they drag the sorry bastard back to HQ, just for the guy that sent them off on the assignment to shoot him for cowardice then take the Commander's spot himself.

>>48996181
>He doesn't roleplay
kill yourself how about.

>>48996230
that's pretty mean, but at least it's fittingly grimdark

>>48996259
Yeah, and one thing worth mentioning is that because they made an ally out of that particular commander, they were able to break through a particularly horrofic space blockade of Chaos fuckery and Orkz at the end of the campaign when they asked for his assistance

>>48967729

Oh shit, is that the same GM who did the Priestess thing? Because truly, he is the king of NTR.

>>48996329
See, so you're not a complete asshole GM.

>unless that commander then got gangbanged

>>48968433

Truly the whitest of knights.

>>48996371

Princess thing?

>>48968099
Can't speak for all players everywhere, but that's definitely true for me. I cannot be trusted to not go mad with power.

and in the game

>>48982888
>only he found funny
Says you. If I was at that table I'd love the GM forever for screwed with the obnoxious weeb.

>>48991363

The funniest part is that arguably, the other guy deserves her more since HE gave her a body. Not the PC.

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>>48996636
>weeb

>>48996230

That happens a lot in Deathwatch. I recall one mission where we helped an Inquisitor escape with some sort of anti-Tyranid enzyme, but the ship was damaged and needed some time to function.

He told the Imperial Guardsman we'd rescued to hold the line and buy him time to escape. Of course, we got to come along - Adeptus Astartes are really important - but no, the poor bastards could just eat shit.

>>48996484

http://archive.4plebs.org/tg/thread/48900638

>>48996152
So that was total time or time since you found her.

>>48974962
Jordin?

>>48996675
Oh please. Read over his posts and you can tell he's the dumb weeb who stroked his girl-staff every time his party set camp, insisting on doing it publicly and gave the other players nasty looks for whispering and chuckling between themselves when he spouted cliched lines from his favorite animes.

By the way the PC who did in one session what he didn't do in two fucking years gets shit done and deserved the girl (and if we're taking this seriously the dipshit who never cared about freeing his waifu from her predicament definitely didn't deserve her)

>>48996097
This, basically.

>>48967729
Or look at it from her perspective

>Trapped in an unending hell
>reach out to staff wielder in hopes he will get you out
>he never clues in you're just nice to him to get out
>He will never let you out, just wants a powerful staff
>other guy busts you out
>Finally have a body
>want some dick
>offer first guy as a pitty fuck
>he says no
>fuck everything with a dick within 100 meters instead.

you were the real BBEG all along.

>>48997788
Damn right.

He actually stated that he viewed his waifu getting a human body a consolation prize for losing his powerful staff.

/r/ing fanfic of the 9 guard gangbang from the female cleric's perspective. don't let me down /tg/

>>48974928
It is.

>>48992327
Magic is irrelevant unless the prostitute had bracers of strength or something.

>>48993846
Someone suddenly getting a body is something that generally needs to be thought about. That's an extreme and jarring change, no matter how positive it is. Any normally functioning person would need at least a little time to process a change of that magnitude. People in real life get totally freaked out about far smaller changes than your talking staff suddenly gaining a real body to fuck you with.

>>48984069
thatsthejoke.png

>>48991483
>The player needs to pass a strenght check first before his character can roll* one.

Your logic checks out, thank you baitmaster

>>48993846
>oh, my best friend, who was a staff, now has a body
>that's right, I should bone her right away to celebrate

No wonder this place is so shit. That's absolutely not how 99,9% of normal people would react.

At least this experience showed anon that the GM is a prick and to never romance any NPC ever because of things like this.

>>48993937
While I can understand the reaction in-character, anon is right OoC. Why the fuck would the GM think that suddently going *poof*, the girl is back in human body, is a good fucking idea?

>>48994743
>the GM didn't expect him to fuck up so spectacularly in that situation.
I doubt that the GM was thinking anything, really

What kind of retard would just be like "whoops, the girl of your dreams that was your staff suddently has her body back, just like that, herp derp"?

The kind of retard who would make the girl go fuck 9 random dudes instead of insisting to go with the guy for a silent walk while he sorts his thoughts.

>>48967895
At the very least,he has a goal for his character.

>>48995653
I'm sorry that you had to deal with a shitty GMs' speshul snowflake villain.

>>48971545
Roast in hell, feminist.

>>48996097
You're single right?

>>48990935
Reality is mysogynistic. Get over it.

>>48993892
Still very evil.

>>48998806
If it's justified, it's not evil.

>>48998806
Not him.

But pirates were evil: what is your point?

>>48993846
This isn't a 1:1 analogy but just imagine you had a son/daughter who wanted a sex change.

You need a fucking moment to sort that out with yourself (this assuming you're okay with it).

Then instead of your child telling you about the sex change but instead comes home as the opposite sex and tells you to except them.

You would need one moment to figure this all out.

BUT since you decided to take walk your child sees you as an asshole for not accepting him/her and goes out fucking all your friends.

>>48980463
Because it's a ROLE playing game, the character got attached to person in the staff.

I mean if you're going to care more about weapons, go play vidya because it's sounds like you just want to kill shit.

>>48996662
Only because the DM contrived it. Anon and staff girl must have discussed it, and she wouldn't have fallen for anon if he made it clear he didn't want to change her back. It's just that they couldn't find a way. Then all of a sudden it's as simple as making a single prayer, but the DM only lets another PC do it, doesn't do anything to get anon in on it, and then proceeds to royally fuck him over when he needs a minute? Come the fuck on.

>>48997788
>you're just nice to him to get out
>offer first guy as a pitty fuck
If that's how she saw anon, as a mere means to an end, then maybe she deserved to remain a staff.

>>48998820
Yes it fucking is. Evil people rationalize their actions all the time. That's why we say "everyone is the hero of their own story".

>>48998898
That's a terrible analogy.

You're terrible at trying to convince people that you aren't dumb as a box of rocks, and twice as noisy.

>>48999355
>ad hominem
Nice comeback there, shitnugget.

Not the guy you were replying to btw

>>48998583
>best friend
>mad that they're fucking someone else
Anon that's not a best friend, that's a friendzone
When your best friend gets laid you're happy for them, not salty

>>48998820
I guess when the mafia kills all those dudes that fuck them over its the same then
Because that's literally what this is.

Ironically I can guarantee this party didn't check the npcs they left in charge of their finances etc for legitimacy or trustworthiness
Maybe the gm had a plan with it, somewhere it was going

Most players on tg genuinely seem go be unable to accept loss as a story mechanic and assume it's just the gm trying to be a dick

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>>48967642
No, your GM sounds fucking amazing.

>>48989281
If DM wouldn't start shit for lulz, yeah, it'd be. I am surprised anons in this thread try to pine all kinds of explanations for why it'd make sense while it's established DM didn't give a shit about character's needs or whatever, he literally done it for the lulz.

That makes it a shitty DM - not only results, but reasons behind them. Same with great DMing - if DM fumbled through the campaign and was shit and it's the players who basically had to make all the fun for themselves and each other, DM was not good.

>>48999310

Maybe she didn't want to ask him for it, but when someone else gave it as a gift, it meant a lot. Like, your girlfriend doesn't expect a diamond ring from you, but if someone drove up and gave her a new car, free of charge, she'd be very appreciative.

Anon seems like a tremendously clingy guy anyway.

>>48998583

Dude, she was probably grinding him right there and wanting an introduction to the pleasures of the flesh. If you just got a body for the first time, you would want to get drunk, gorge yourself and get laid, in no particular order.

This girl wanted to fuck his brains out, and all he had to do was to, well, do her.

>>48994743
>Obviously, the GM didn't expect him
>He probably went into a sort of fugue state and decided

No, anon, stop excusing bullshit. You already read it, as a stated fact: GM done it for lulz. Fucked up because player actually roleplayed somewhat shocked guy and it's the girl character who suddenly turned slut. And it's not because she was secretly a slut, or had an angle or felt betrayed (which all are kind of stupid explanations - no sane person, no matter the itch, is going for gangbang after harrowing experience she had). It's because GM wanted lulz. Just plain handwaving.

That fits the thread. GM was an asshole. And he fucked up potential for nice drama, character development and RP. It basically was RP version of "rocks fall, everyone dies".

>>48996417
Fitting for the setting, though.

I am surprised how many anons are fine with just fucking at first opportunity. Are so many of /tg/ just horny neckbeards who never got any and are now so desperate? I thought it was just a meme.

>>48999847
I'm fine with fucking at first opportunity and I *still* think what anon did was perfectly understandable and the DM was just a dick, because I understand that people have emotions and some situations can shake them up for a while.

>>48999847
> Are so many of /tg/ just horny neckbeards who never got any and are now so desperate?
They are. People here have no clue how sex or real life work and get their ideas of them from NTR doujins and some imaginary vision of how "Chads" or "alphas" are supposed to act.

>>48968561
Jean d'arc
Reality is truly stranger than fiction eh anon? She was 19 when she was burned.

>>48999982

Joan of Arc didn't fight with a sword, though. She outright stated "I love my banner more than my sword."

From wikipedia:

> The extent of her actual military participation and leadership is a subject of debate among historians. On the one hand, Joan stated that she carried her banner in battle and had never killed anyone,[40] preferring her banner "forty times" better than a sword;[41] and the army was always directly commanded by a nobleman, such as the Duke of Alençon for example.

>>48999982
And she was unique enough among her peers that she went legendary. And even then I don't recall any unembelished records of her in any battle that'd suggest she had physical strength above average, yet alone at uncommonly great level.

Hardly an argument, anon.

>>48998898
More like a loved one was suddenly paralyzed in a freak accident and, after years of talking and being with you, suddenly wakes up one day to find herself perfectly healthy.

>I need time to sort things out.

Sort what out? The best thing that could possibly have happened to someone you supposedly care about just happened and you need time to consider how this affects YOU? How selfish could one person possibly be?

Sure, what the DM had happen next sucks, but that doesn't mean what anon did wasn't just as absurd.

>>48967701
It becomes this.

>>48999825
How was it rocks fall everyone dies? Because stafffu was no longer pure and thus a dirty slut?

>>48993937
>And to her, it probably felt like an incredible betrayal. He finds out that the woman he loves can finally express that love in a fashion she has probably been wishing she was able to for years, and instead of unconstrained joy, she is met with panic as the person she loves shies away and instead goes for a walk.
To be honest, as a girl who have been in a somewhat similar situation after a 1 year long distance relationship, this really is heartbreaking.

The gangbang part is a bit absurd and heavy-handed, but you have had a lot of time to "sort things out", suddenly going "Oh wait, hold on, I'll go take a walk!" after things are getting heavy, is straight up like telling the girl "Nah, not interested."

That isn't necessarily what you intend to convey with that kind of action, but that's what it feels like. The GM likely didn't know this, but it still stands.

Walking out on a girl who have wanted you for a long time is pretty douchy.

>>49000430
>Walking out on a girl who have wanted you for a long time is pretty douchy.
Now substitute the "girl" for a "guy" in this sentence and tell me it is not creepy/unreasonable/rapey/pathetic etc.

>>48995708
>I'm inclined to think the DM got turbo-butthurt that the player ruined a tender moment by saying he "needed to go out and walk."
Honestly sounds more like the player got turbo-butthurt.

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>>48967729
Ya got cucked!

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Shut the fuck up.

>my very first tabletop game
>GM brags about how his last character from an epic level advanced d&d became a demigod
>we go through chargen
>very first scene is this evil demigod summoning us via a teleportation spell into his antechamber
>demands that we carry a package across the land from point a to point b or we die
>"you can't just teleport it?"
>"NO, NOW DO IT AND DON'T DAWDLE OR I WILL INSTANTLY STRIKE YOU DOWN, MY AGENTS ARE WATCHING"
>ok fine
>giant evil town with dragons stalking around it and laughing at us (????)
>we trudge away sullenly
>walk through goblin forest
>nearly die on our first encounter due to brutally bad rolling...to goblins (this is actually not so bad)
>encounter more people on our quest as more people IRL join the tabletop next session, including death knight and evil half dragon fighters
>encounter a cathedral in the middle of the forest (????????)
>there is a cleric who offers us a meal and shelter
>oh thank god
>cleric IMMEDIATELY demands that we all shift our alignments to lawful good or he will kill us (?????????????????????)
>death knight attacks and we are all drawn into conflict
>priest nearly TPKs us, all but one of us are in negatives by the end
>"I went easy on you this encounter, he was level 17"
>we were level 1
>?????????????????????????????????
>during our travels this game devolves into really stupid IRL shitposting because nobody can believe it or take this seriously
>deathknight elects to stay awake at one campsite
>"can I roll to rape the half-dragon?"
>half dragon: "Wh--n-"
>GM: "Okay, roll a d20"
>"You succeed"

At this point the game completely unraveled but it's a miracle I ever stuck with this stupid fucking hobby.

>>49000469
>Now substitute the "girl" for a "guy" in this sentence and tell me it is not creepy/unreasonable/rapey/pathetic etc.
What? No.

Look, I know some feminist idiots will think this way, but I would have been an evil bitch if I had flirted with a guy for a full year, and then cockblocked him randomly when we finally got the chance to meet up.

That's not how normal and reasonable people should be acting. If you didn't want it, you should have at least made it clear prior to meeting up.

>>48967729
Just kill them, what's the problem?

>>49000566
Fair enough.

If you look at this thread, at both sides of the dispute, you will quickly notice that "normal" and "reasonable" are not readily applicable adjectives. On one hand you have autists who "fall in love" with a make-believe characters, on the other - internet tough-guys whose idea of human behaviour comes from an almost platonic way they imagine normalfag "tough guys" and who are ok with re-enacting gangbangs involving imaginary characters in a social environment.

This is why I don't play tabletop anymore. It's glorified play-pretend which, unless you're playing with real friends whom you know really well, more often than not devolves into depravity and pathetic fanwank.

>>49000640
>unless you're playing with real friends whom you know really well
Which is why this is what you should stick to.

>>48993420
The dorfs elected David Cameron.

>>48996181
Why are you here, then?

>>49000741
>roleplaying is the only /tg/ activity in existence
kys yourself my man.

Also, I think that's the main tragedy of roleplaying and /tg/. The activity is, in an ideal world, interesting and fun. Even /tg/, as shit as it is, sometimes produces nice stories and concepts. But that's all there is to it, because in practice roleplaying is way too much effort for a mediocre way to kill time which is only entertaining if stars align just right.

That's why I, and I believe many other people, browse /tg/ for interesting threads but don't roleplay, or have very low opinion of actual roleplaying.

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>>49000864
>Even /tg/, as shit as it is, sometimes produces nice stories and concepts.
Not anymore. People who couldn't stand creativity chased the creative people off the board.

>>48967729
>Getting cucked by an NPC

Jesus christ anon

>>48968368
>>"she drags you away anyways"
>Then I stab her to get away screaming "I don't want AIDS"
Is probably what I would have said.

>>49000169
Because GM apparently worked with the player to have this romance thing going for two in-game years, so presumably it was to lead somewhere other than just fucking stuff up. Then, due to player's quite reasonable and believable hesitation, that romance, understanding and the like gets thrown out of the window and not even for in-game reasons, but because GM wanted lulz, as he himself confessed.

>>48979483
Not everyone is a cock whore

>>49001030
According to 4chan, all women are either cock-hungry sluts or just don't know it yet/can't get any because they are fat or ugly.

>>49000640
I am not sure why do you have to bring it down to stereotypes and extremes when it's nto even that. I agree, "defenders of love" and "clueless wannabe alphas" are both groups full of retards but the problem with this case is whether GM acted reasonably or not. Fucking up a subplot he made with the player, making character do a heel turn without storyline reason/explanation is an asshole behavior. While anons here can be making excuses - some worse than other (and actually hardly believable for anyone who ever had a healthy, normal, working relationship) - the fact is that none of these were made by GM, who done shit for the sake of cheap laughs and messing with the player.

>>49001048
Unless they're lesbians.

The number of lesbian RPG players is astonishingly high.

>>49001082
Lesbians aren't real.

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>>48967731
Oh boi, I have news for you.

>>48967642

The guard let you in, didn't he? That makes him better than 99% of every other guard.

>>48999310
I'm with this guy. The GM should not have even allowed the other player to free the staff girl without presenting an opportunity to the character that actually invested time with her.

Furthermore, funny or not, deserved or not, the GM took a massive shit on his own game and players. If I pulled this shit in a game I would not expect the game to last long after.

>>49001068
I am not defending the GM - who is a socially inept prick with a fetish. But the fact that people take this kind of issue seriously and invent the justifications you were referring to in your post speaks volumes about /tg/'s demographic.

We may keep laughing this off, but the truth is that behind all the ironic shitposting and "ebin racist posts xD" etc., 4chan is really full of awful people with twisted views of social interactions. /tg/ happens to be one of the worse ones as well - right there with /lit/ or /v/ - because they always take themselves seriously.

>>48997788
>>other guy busts you out
>>Finally have a body
>>want some dick
Your logic completely failed right there. The first thing you want to do after being trapped in a staff for years and your only point of contact is a wizard is to not try and find pieces of your old life, hang out with the wizard, find out why you want to do with your life since you now have a body after so many years, or any Miriam of more rational options she decides to have sex with 9 random people and abandon her "boyfriend" because he was so shocked by her appearing out of thin that he needed time to think off all of the above things.

>>48983118
>MIASMA OF HOMO LUST
HELP
MY SIDEskhdjkbg

>>48999982
geez at least start with La Maupin you uneducated pleb

>>48989444
No atempt was made to identity what the scroll did?

>>49001458

It's been hundred of years. Everyone and everything you know is dead. Either you get some dick from Mr. White Knight, or you get fucked good and hard by the guy who actually gave you your body back.

Shit's obvious.

>>49001048
No, according to 4chan, all internet women are that.
Because on internet, your gender isnt neither relevant at all or a point to consider in any conversation.
That's why, actual women dont give a fuck about standing out from the blurred default everyone is considered , and why women that make a point on "Hey, I'm a WOMAN on the internet" are doing nothing but seek attention and be treated differently for what's not hanging from their crotches, when it does not matter at all.
It's why, before this wave of internet feminism, 4chan used to point "Who you are doesnt matter unless its needed to understand what you're saying"

>>49001879
If it's been so long, I'd suspect the person to actually care about fucking first dick available even less than any average woman - suddenly there's shitload of things to do with your life, your whole existence changed. Suddenly you can go to so many places, create so many goals for yourself. But, no, a guy you were in love with is as surprised by the change as you likely are and needs a minute so... gotta get them dicks, you guess?

Bullshit even from in-game perspective. And even that doesn't really matter because in reality there wasn't in-game perspective, it was just GM going "okay, I'm gonna fuck up the shit we built for who knows how many sessions just so I can have 10 seconds of laughter".

>>49001954

You have to admit, it was hilarious.

>>49001968
Eh, not really, I'd just facepalm - it wasn't even original or ambitious as humor, just "lol so random cause giggles". To hell with staff waifu, that's cringey, but if they went with it and it became some part of the story, it's GM's responsibility to not fuck it up like he did.

So, like it was written above, it's about as hilarious as GM in the middle of some campaign, unprovoked, for no good reason deciding "you all now have heart attacks and die".

>>49001895
Why would gender never be relevant to a conversation?

>>49001968
No, it wasn't. I find no amusement in other people's undeserved suffering.

>>48972442
never played swashbuckler before are they a cheesy class?

>>48998513
lel
But if you'd taken Meta-gamer as your class, you should already be proficient in Sense Motive.

>>49001701
Duelists use Dex instead of Str though.

>>49003756
>What kind of setting are you running where women kill people with blades?

It's still a blade

>>48967911
I need to make an MMO that sends all newbies on a fetch quest which has no reward because "You actually went out and did it? Hahahaha hey everyone, look at this idiot! He collected actual boar assholes!"

>>48998691
>>>/pol/
You meme loving fuck.

>>48989471
>cucked
>involuntary
nice meme you retard, it's not cucking since he specified this broke the relationship

>>49004337

What, by leaving the room for a moment?

>>49004346
I assume it wasn't an imaginary girlfriend anymore based on what anon said.

>>49003938
That would be great, honestly.

>>48967642
So fucking stolen.
This is going to become a tradition at my table.

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>>49003873
Alright, didn't see that part of the conversation.
Still, from the Str side of things, there really is a lack of actual examples for women. The ones that do exist were either Cha based (Joan) or Dex based.

For the record, that "14 Str rule that never needed to be announced" thing is from Virt. It's hilariously difficult to disprove however.

>>48983118
>PCs
>sane people with common sense

I suppose it's theoretically possible, but I've never seen it happen.

>>48989592
It's only funny the first time, later you realize GM might have some minor OCD issues when he makes the group roleplay opening a door or deny a player a water skin refill because "He never uncorked it back at the fountain" and gets annoying.
If it was something consistent, there would be no issue, but when he suddenly decides to drop into realistic mechanics for no real reason, its quite a slap to the face.

I'm playing a haggard Town-Guard archer on leave to repay a favour to an adventurer friend of his, winds up getting caught up in an adventure of his own but very much feels to be a serviceman at heart and not a vagabond. When fighting intellgient humanoids he always attempts to take them alive and restrain them,if he can't send them back to some kind of jail to pay for their crimes, at the very least he will give them a good beating and telling off and then leave them tied up on the roadside to think about what they did wrong.

Fighting in combat, using Sharpshooter to deliver some accurate headshots that ignore cover. Roll a natural 1. "Your shot hits the party druid in the head, roll 1d8+14 damage." "Wait, really? I'm a longbow sniper and I can accidentally hit my allies if they are in the way still?" "You did roll a nat one" "And I hit them in the HEAD, you know that accurate shot I do that lets me pinpoint vitals, I'm accidentally doing it on my ally?" "You rolled the Nat one, not me, now resolve damage."

Repeat every single time in combat I roll a Nat1, it magically headshots an ally, including but not limited to, missing a shot when trying to shoot down a flying enemy, DM rolled randomly to determine which ally my arrow fell down point first into and one time when I fired a shot at an enemy, rolled a natural one and said "Oh well, at least there isn't anyone int he line of fire." "Uhh actually, your shot hits the Paladin." "The fuck, why? He is literally twenty feet away from the line of fire." "Yeah, but hes got that shield of arrow-attraction, so your shot curves mid-shot and hits him in the neck." "Over twenty feet, pulling my arrow at a literal 45 degree angle?" "Yup, roll damage."

>>49006541
The worst bit of all, was later we're fighting the BBEG, a powerful demon and his warlock summoner who happened to be the Sister to the party paladin. Sister gets knocked low, so I move in to try and grapple her and manacle her to prevent her from casting spells and healing the demon. DM has her scream out "Oh save me brother hes going to kill me, save me!" to the Paladin who is standing nearby, fighting the demon.

"So, Paladin, as your sister cries out to be saved, do you think your character would take a free attack against the archer?"
"Wait, okay seriously, out of all of the people in the party, the frothing retard barbarian, the cannibal druid and execute-them-for-my-religion-of-peace cleric, I'm the only character in the party who has never killed a humanoid, we've been travelling together for a long time now and I've always taken the effort to restrain and interrogate whenever possible, don't you think that might conflict with the fear that I'm actually murdering your sister when you can clearly see I'm trying to drag her away from the dangerous combat to save her."
"Mhmm, that is true, but at the same time, it is like, my characters sister so he is totally on her side, and I don't know maybe there could be a good reason she summoned this huge demon, plus you know you DID shoot me that one time. I think I'm going to side with the sister and attack you with a divine smite."

Naturally I drop, the Warlock gets up, buffs the demon and heals it, the party have to fight without me, the paladin is knocked down by the demon, then the cannibal druid leaps on the wounded sister and mauls her to death, eating her chunks of her corpse, we manage to rally up, slay the demon although obviously in the aftermath of the battle, the Paladins sister is very very very dead with no chance to interrogate her or have her awnser for her crimes or for the Paladin to have a heart to heart with her.

>>48984450
This tbqh
It's even well written
>cucked out of reality by the cheetomaster

>>49006795
And at the end of it all, who does the party blame? Me. Because A) Well, last I heard my sister was being attacked by you, then when I woke up she was dead despite it being VERY CLEARLY teeth and claws mauled her body into red paste from the chest down, it must have been the archer. and B) To be honest dude you should have been fighting the big demon instead of wasting time with the sister, why didn't you do that we would have won the fight sooner. Because apparently they don't fucking concept of the fact that she was a high level spellcaster buffing the demon and fighting her was a waste of time when I could have put more damage on the BBEG.

So all this party drama aside, we saved the day, defeated the demon lord and get to finish this story and get ready to move on to the next one. Due to general disgust of his travelling companions, my archer decides to return home to his family with his share of the coin to return to work as a town-guardsman and live happily ever after, after saving the realm.

So next session when we show up, I'm rolling up a wizard for the teams next adventure the DM reads the epilogue for the last part, apparently while clearing the area one of the cultists stabs my character in the chest with a poisoned dagger and he falls down stairs and dies, instead of getting his "Returns to family." part. I asked why because obviously he wants to veto the happy ending to set up some kind of plot hook. "Oh no, like you see hes a town guard right like an officer? He was ending his careeer as an adventurer so it's like he was just a couple days away from retirement so he HAS to die, get it?".

Literally worst campaign roleplay/characterwise I've ever played through, and that includes the time I GM'd a game of rough and touble adventurers who turned all heel-face-turned into chaotic-evil torture fetishists half way through the second session.