Campaign Defining Moments

File: 1469318805854.jpg (19KB, 200x176px) Image search: [Google]

19KB, 200x176px

When the drow stuck his dick in the centaur I knew exactly where that campaign was going

>>48662845
>Call of Cthulhu
>Player arrives at the cults hideout before the rest of the team
>Has an idea, rolls to disguise himself as a janitor using tools he finds laying around
>Walks into the middle of the cults hideout, in front of dozens of worshippers
>"Its okay, Im a janitor from the goverment. Im here to clean up."
>Rolls a perfect 1.
>"Congratulations, they all have no doubt that you are a janitor from the government."
>They all immediately shoot the fuck out of him
>Barely manages to crawl away into his car before they kill him

It...didn't get better.

>roll characters
>step out to piss while the DM sets up
>come back to the table and the other two players are already ERPing

I need new friends.

File: 1455566495384.jpg (79KB, 589x774px) Image search: [Google]

79KB, 589x774px

Probably when they decided to torture the bandit leader's wife by cutting long gouges in her stomach and filling them with honey to attract flies to feast on the wounds.

They also lured her children in by leaving her somewhere she could scream for help and they drew in the kids and held them all hostage to get the bandit leader to surrender his weapons. Then they shot him anyway, which took a while cause he had like 50 hp. He tried to run away after picking up his crossbow but by then he only had like 13 hp left so they brought him to 0, dragged him back, and then one of the players killed one of his children and brought it back as a zombie and forced him to watch while tied up as the child zombies devoured its mother alive feet first.

Sad thing is I still DM for these fuckers.....

>>48662921
More like this. When you realized your game was going to be shit.

File: 20160707_095013.jpg (46KB, 213x164px) Image search: [Google]

46KB, 213x164px

>>48663317
Good god anon, those people are insane.

>>48662845
Players just burned down a pub and were running from the law. They ran past a cottage with an old man staring out the window at them.
"Shit, he'll tell the guards." A player says before he fires an arrow into the man's jugular.
Then a woman cries out "Oh my god, my husband!"
The player fired another arrow into the open window and rolled a 20.
"You hear a baby crying and a body thumping to the ground."
"I throw a bottle of Alchemist's Fire into the building."

The players then went on the kill another family and kidnap the child to raise as their own.
I think the campaign ended with one player implied to have raped an orphan boy.

>>48662845
>sailing on a boat back home
>protecting an emissary
>getting close to port
>storm is picking up
>one of the PCs is hated by Zeus
>Iwonderwhocouldbebehindthis.jpg
>PC hated by Zeus stands on prow and shouts insults
>another PC, cleric of Priapus, stands at full mast
>both get struck by lightning
>one loses a leg, the other gets a bunch of scars on his dick

It's only been two sessions, but I'm pretty sure the rest of the campaign will be the party fighting against the church of Zeus.

File: child surrounded by rape.jpg (2MB, 5184x3456px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 5184x3456px

>>48663831
>implied to have raped an orphan boy
how does that get implied?

>>48663912
>Drags screaming orphan to a back room
>Says he makes a grapple role, succeeds
>Comes back, bloody and in a chipper mood
Never really went into detail past that, cause Im pretty sure everyone knew that would be a bad, bad idea.
Even if it wasn't, I mean, c'mon.

>>48663978
>>48663912
Oh, yeah, the orphan had made the mistake of trying to pickpocket him. Doesn't change much, but, uh...theres that?

>>48663875
What game is this?

>>48664005
>>48663875
I too, wish to know this.

>>48663875
>another PC, cleric of Priapus, stands at full mast
Admit it, you made up this whole story just so you could post that line.

>>48664005
>>48664017
Hackmaster 4th edition

>>48664050
Close, I made the character because I thought it would be an interesting deity to follow, especially in a high fantasy world. Getting to make cheesy jokes is just a well appreciated bonus.

>>48663317
They sound like edgelords who have never been exposed to IRL traumatic violence. It's because they don't understand the emotional depth of doing something horrible to another living being.