How do eldar taste like?

The taste changes the longer you chew on them; it starts terrible, but the flavor gradually gets better and better until it tastes like the the greatest thing you've ever experienced (note ate, experienced.)

>>48639268
Salty, mostly.

>>48639298
Longer in human time or eldar time?
the longest im willing to chew a bite is about 2 minutes human time

>>48639332

Eldar time, of course.

You'll be chewing on raw sewage and rotten garbage for the first hour, it will take maybe a day of chewing to get to the "first kiss" and "seeing your lover naked" stage.

>>48639351
That's the same effect if i just take literal sewage and chew if for a day, since i will start halucinating from the gasses and brain rot

wait

what if i cook the eldar meat first?

>>48639374
>what if i cook the eldar meat first?
Don't. It just turns to rubber and you'll ruin the taste.

If you have to cook it at all, try briefly searing it.

>>48639705
Since cooking is out the window,
Can i smoke it?

>>48639268
like pussy of course, isn't it obvious?

>>48639732
So, eldar pussy tastes like pussy squared?

>>48639763

Eldar don't have a pussy, they are one big labia waiting to be penetrated by a trusty bayonett

>>48640180
How does slaanesh do his/her thing then?

>>48640220
What thing?

>>48640248
The rape thing

>>48640283

By drilling new holes along the way.

>>48640324
oh, just anywhere on the body?

>>48640341

I guess so, unless you have a better idea.

>>48640350
Are tau any more fun?

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>>48640372

Yes.

>>48640419
Sweet

How do Tau taste like?

>>48640419
bring me dem earth caste hips

>>48640437
Like blueberries mixed with fish

>>48640437

Blue berry mixed with human pussy (the rotten fish taste)

>>48640470
>>48640484

Hivemind

>>48640470
>>48640484

I like Tau more now,
post moar delicious xenos

>>48640517
male or female? This is important

>>48640517

The Romans considered cunnilingus the lowest a man could degrade himself for a reason, degenerate.

>>48640568
ALL of them, no mercy

>>48640574
Well im not roman

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>>48640605
>Well im not roman

Yeah and with that kind of pussy sucker attitude you never will be, son.

>>48640574
Preeetty sure that was serving as irrumator.

>>48640655

Nope, women were below men. So if you lick a pussy as a let's say senator, you are literally serving a second rate citizen.

>>48640646
Celts for life, boy-fucker

>>48640706
>unironically preferring women for pleasure

Fucking barbaric.

>>48640744
Yes, where are the tau women i was promised

>>48640744
Guess who got dominated by barbarians in the end.

>>48640768

I would never promise anything to a smelly Celt.

>>48639268
Like chicken.

>>48639268

Eldar tears are a delicacy

>>48640788
Do you even lift, roman?

>>48640818
He doesn't, he's too busy being cucked by Visigoths.

>>48640853
300+ years of glory and all it took was a party bus of germanics to stop by at the right time and boom, end of roman empire

We left off at Tau booty,
the booty isnt just good, its greater than good
the tau know their priorities

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Eldar meat is so delicious that it has an endless deliciousness factor, with an enormous taste and an endless bliss that remains even after consuming it. Eldar organs possess a high concentration of nutrients and energy. If eaten raw, a human can work from seven to ten days in a row without sleep. Also, the tongue has a high concentration of fat and when heated it turns into oil. The oil can be used over and over again without turning old.

Oh, and eldar blood is tremendously concentrated and surprisingly sweet, similar to champagne jelly with a touch of honey. Just a tea-cup of it is enough to turn a whole 25-meter pool into a huge bowl of inebriant liquid heaven. Because of its intensity, people are cautioned against eating too much of it.

>>48641730
>Lord Captain, the body has been prepared fully
>Good, good. We start slowly, is the bleeding liquor ready?
>Yes Lord Captain, who shall be served first at the banquet? The good Captain Brusko, or . . .
>No, the Eldar Matriarch we invited, serve her first, then Brusko, I want to see both their faces by the end of this dinner.
>Yes Lord Captain.
ROGUE TRADERS, NO SENSE OF RIGHT OR WRONG

>>48641898
>Trader is later entertained on the Eldar vessel
>Eldar serve up human in retaliation to the first meal
>Trader digs in and comments offhandedly that the best ingredients for this dish seem to come from this little colony he sometimes does business with
>space elves not sure what to think any more

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>>48642111
A sensible chuckle can be heard from the warp

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>>48641898
>>48642111
Fucking rogue traders man